The Story Of Us
by Twilightx28
Summary: Seventeen year old Bella Swan wants to leave Forks after her parents divorce left her life in shambles. Eighteen year old Edward Masen moves to Forks after his parents divorce changed his life forever, with plans to pursue his dreams at Juilliard at the end of the year. Sparks fly during the hard times they both face, and will Edward leave the only person he's truly loved behind?Bx
1. I'm Not Okay, I Promise

**Authors Note- PLEASE READ ALL NOTES BELOW!**

**Full Summary-**

**Isabella Swan is hanging on by a string. Seventeen years old and a hard-working, blunt smoking, Bella , is trying her hardest to get out of small town Forks by dedicating herself to school and work. With her re-married father no longer present in her life, and a flighty mother thousands of miles away, she has only few friends and new step-siblings and a step-mother that have taken away the relationship with her father she once barely had.**

**Edward Masen, eighteen, and a seemingly bad boy, moves into town and takes Isabella's life for a spin. When they quickly fall into a fast blissful romance during the end of a school year and during the summer, what happens when Edward has plans of his own not to stay in Forks with his mother and her new husband? Will he decide to follow his dreams to Juilliard and leave behind the girl he loves that is barely hanging on?**

**There is one thing I want to touch base on with this summary. Charlie is going to be somewhat of a jerk in this story, but Bella's step-mother and siblings will not be all like that. As you read the story, you will get the idea of it, I promise!**

**Edward and Bella's relationship will progress quickly and they will become a couple early on in the story. I know that gives it away, but I just wanted to forewarn because it won't be a story where I drag it out. But here's a warning, you will be drowning in fluff for awhile.**

**I don't imagine this story being longer than 30 chapters, but I don't know for sure how long it will be.**

**This story is rated M for drug use, depression with characters, alcohol use, strong language sexual situations- I will not be writing descriptive lemons that go into detail, that's not something I am thinking about doing for this story right now. Most of the sexual situations will be suggestive and descriptive in other ways. To get to the point; If you are looking for hardcore lemons, then this won't satisfy you.**

**So, yeah, here is the first chapter!**

**Disclaimer- S. Meyer owns all things Twilight.**

**Chapter Song- I'm Not Okay (I Promise) ~ My Chemical Romance**

**STORY BEGINS IN 2007**

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BPOV

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As a child, life is perfect, at least, pretty close to it. Mine was. Especially when you have parents that are both together, happily married and perfectly content with what they have. I was an only child, my mother, Renee, and my father, Charlie and I lived in a small town in Washington known as Forks. It's not commonly known, probably because our population doesn't even reach four thousand and it's an all around boring town. In order to do anything remotely fun you have to go to Port Angeles or Seattle, both of which range from being two to three hours away.

I still had a love for Forks when I was a kid though, it was fine for me. My life had basically been completely charmed. That was up until I was fourteen years old.

It was the summer before high school started when things went haywire, and my life had completely did a three sixty and turned upside down.

The day started out good, actually, it was a great day. The sun was shining brightly through my bedroom window, and I got up with a huge smile. Forks probably got sun three times a year, and that wouldn't even be an exaggeration. It was always raining or cloudy around here, and especially with the sun shining in summer, we were definitely heading to the beach.

My best friend, Angela, and her family were going to La Push Beach along with Angela's younger twin brothers. I'd packed up all my beach gear, put on my suit and was ready for a great day. My mom had made me my favorite breakfast before I left, waffles with bacon, and fresh strawberries on the side with a sprinkle of powder sugar.

We spent the entire afternoon in the sand, in the water, and laying out tanning. It was a really fun day and we had a great time. Her parents were really nice, and I'd basically grown up with Angela so they knew me well. Everyone in Forks really knew each other, because it was just a small town and everyone was friendly and nice to everybody, for the most part.

That day when we headed back from the beach we got to Angela's and her dad grilled up some burgers and hotdogs, it was around six in the evening. Her mom also prepared a salad and we all ate outside around their bonfire pit. It was around seven that Angela and her dad dropped me off at my house. With promises to call Angela tomorrow, I headed into my house and immediately knew something was going on. It was quiet, the house almost felt...cold, and not in the sense of getting goose bumps, in a way that it didn't feel homey.

I saw my parents sitting at the kitchen at the table, they looked stern, serious. It was unfamiliar to me; they always were smiling and happy around me. At that moment the warm feeling of home was just gone.

My parents sat me down that night and told me that they were getting a divorce. They weren't happy together, they said.

I'd never seen it coming.

They'd never fought in front of me, maybe a tiny argument about something stupid here and there, but nothing that alerted me of anything close to separating. It was a complete and total shock and I remembered not saying one word, and I had just left the room and ran upstairs, not believing that it had been happening.

The worse part of it all, was knowing that I had to pick. I would have either gone with my mother, or stayed here with my father. They made the choice themselves in the end, though, I didn't have to make the choice, and I was staying here in Forks. I was fourteen at the time, and I was a girl, it was a big changing period for me. I needed my mom the most then.

I found out that she was going to Phoenix, and that she already had arrangements for where she was going to live and what-not. The day she walked out of the front door was probably the worst, because I knew that once she did, it won't be the same as when she says she will visit.

It all happened so fast, and it was an awful time for both my father and I.

At first, I was sad, and I felt alone. But it wasn't long until the pure anger set in.

My father had a full time job working as Chief Police of the town of Forks, and a lot of the time I was alone at home. We had barely ever talked after she left; only spoke a word when we absolutely had to. At first, I understood. We had bills to pay, and I tried to help out as much as I could. My father was also grieving, but at the same time; so was I. Nothing ever made a difference though even if I tried talking to him. He was gone, I made dinner for myself, and the relationship that we had wasn't even anything I could call a relationship anymore.

I understood he was upset over the divorce. I didn't understand why he shut me out completely. He never bothered to look at me anymore, I think at one point it was because I looked like my mother and he hated the reminder of her. He started working late shifts, pulling doubles and was maybe home for a few hours every three days. It was like he was purposely avoiding me.

Right after I turned fifteen, that's when I noticed my dad spending more time at home, with a woman named Sue Clearwater, who lived on the reservation in La Push. I'd never seen her once around there. She was a widow as of five years when she lost her husband, Harry, to a spontaneous heart attack I'd found out.

That's when I was angry the most. I rebelled a lot against my dad, and I really had gotten myself into the wrong crowd at that point. I was angry that he started spending more time with her then me when he had time off, and that he paid more attention to her. When I would attempt to offer going fishing with him, he would say he was going out on a date with Sue afterwards. It hurt me, a lot. He had absolutely no interest in me, and he made that very clear in his actions and the way he ignored me

What had made it worse was that it had barely been four months since my parent's divorce. A big part of me was upset with him because of that. Maybe it was because he was able to move on so fast, and I was still broken. One thing was for sure, I was upset that he opted to find comfort in Sue, and never said a word to me. It was like I didn't exist to him. Whenever we spoke, it was always something that turned into a conflict or an accusation of something. He was hostile towards me after Sue came around

That's when I got into James' crowd, and I willingly staring getting into smoking and doing pot, drifting away from Angela and Jess, who were my really great friends and always have been. I'd go over after school and James and I would smoke joints in his basement.

At one point I hung out with his friends and got more into a party scene, and I also was almost pulled into sex with some of his other guy friends when I was coming around more often. I honestly could only blame myself. A lot of his friends I started fooling around with, but when one of them thought I wanted to resort to sex; I realized that I had to fucking stop that. That didn't stop me from getting completely high and drunk off my ass completely though.

James is two years older than me, and in the beginning, he showed a lot of interest in me. We've never done anything together, he's a really cool guy and I now think of him like my brother. He kept me away from his friends after that entire ordeal with one of his buddies. James and I just started doing pot alone. He actually was the one person who looked out for me at that time, and still does to this day. I realized what a great friend when we spent more time alone together.

I keep up the smoking pot still. It gets rid of the constant edge I always feel. I needed something to help me. Although my dad never found out about that, at this point, I don't think he would care all that much.

One careless day though, my dad caught me smoking a cigarette outside the house when he got home early from work, I was fifteen. I was unable to escape quick enough, he saw me put it out and knew immediately what it was. It also the same day when James' older brother Felix had pierced the right side of my bottom lip. I was grounded for three months after those two stunts, and I'd never seen my dad so completely angry at me.

The first thing that came to mind was that at least he actually paid attention to me in some way. I had gotten in trouble, but at least he noticed me for the first time in so many months.

We had sat down and tried talking about it, more like I sat and he yelled. I yelled at him, too. I said a few shitty things about what I thought of him being with Sue. I screamed at him for loving her more than me, because he ignored me. He told me that I was only ending up like a screw up like my mother had. I told him that it was his fault. Sue ended up breaking up the fight that night. He apologized for what he'd said to me later, but nothing changed.

The entire conflict was strained. Both of us very obviously didn't get each other anymore, and didn't care to change that. I'd changed since the divorce, and my father wanted to move on from Renee, but with me around; I was a constant reminder of their failed marriage. He didn't understand how awful that made me feel as a person. I would have never thought in a million years this would have happened after the divorce, if anything I thought maybe we would be closer and spend more time together.

It was a few days later that I had found out that my father and Sue were getting married in the spring. It hit me like a ton of bricks, and I realized that I'd finally lost my entire relationship with my father, or at least what was left of it. He was moving on in a big sense. The only ties that binded us was that I was his biological daughter and I lived with him; that was about as far as it went.

I finally realized that he was happy with the way things were. It didn't matter anymore, and I had given up on trying to mend things with my father. He didn't care anymore about me, and he was moving on with Sue. He was getting married and that was the end of it.

I was introduced to Sue's kids, Seth, Jake and Leah, and then my father and Sue were married the spring before I turned sixteen and entered my sophomore year of high school. Sue was actually very nice, and I knew she saw how Charlie and I were from the beginning. Many times she would sit down and talk to me in the beginning of their relationship and try to stop the constant sobs and nightmares I had in the middle of the night. As time has gone on, Sue barely talks to me. Seth, Jake and Leah are basically like my replacements when it comes to my father. He treats them like he used to treat me; with love, caring and compassion.

I could tell my dad was happy again and that he loved her. I accepted it because Sue was honestly nice. I couldn't be upset. But the hurt that I felt never went away. Angela, Jess and Ben were there for me a lot, and so was James. They were the only ones I had.

It's been over a year now since Sue and her kids entered our broken family. I'm already seventeen, a junior in high school and trying my hardest to get out of here.

Leah is a year younger than me, sixteen, and is a sophomore. She is really nice, always has been towards me and really pretty. Her hair goes down to her shoulders and is a deep dark brown, and she has a naturally tan complexion. She is slim, and probably about an inch shorter than me, standing at five foot three.

Seth is twelve, and completely a sweetheart. His hair is a shaggy light brown and he is basically usual for a twelve year old in size and height. He's always been such a good kid from the start, always respecting me.

Then there was Jake, he is fourteen now, and basically a huge troublemaker at times. When I first met him, he was around thirteen. Jake is almost taller than me, short spiky black hair that is almost darker than Sue's, and brown eyes. We don't exactly talk much, Jake is a little resentful towards his mother's new marriage. I understood.

Leah's Birthday was February 4th, and she turned sixteen this year. Jake's Birthday is July 19th, and he will be turning fifteen later this year. And Seth's Birthday is August 1st, and he will be thirteen later this year.

When our parents got married we, of course, decided to stay in our current house here in Forks; I at least was happy about something. It was definitely tight at first, but some changes to the house were made. There was a smaller room across the hall from mine that was storage for many years, and we had packed it up in boxes, put it in the attic and that became Seth and Jake's room for the time being.

My dad had decided to renovate our basement. It wasn't dirty or filled with boxes like most basements one would think. It was built with three additional bedrooms that Charlie did himself. He had gotten carpet down in the entire space and three rooms and a bathroom were installed down there for Leah and Jake who are now down there in their own bedrooms. We also had a guest bedroom set up down there if any friends stayed over, or just in case it was needed. Phil and my mother use it when they stay here for the holidays they spend here.

Leah and I shared a room for about a month, and we got along okay, but I liked my own space, it was clear. Leah actually thought it was fun, but it was hell for me. I hated walking into my room and hearing her bubblegum pop music, it was annoyed to say in the least. Her Britney, Backstreet Boys, Christina Aguilera, Justin Timberlake, Beyonce and Pussycat Dolls posters were off the wall within an hour of her basement room done.

We are really different; she is more preppy and girly than I am. I am definitely a little more dark and toned down. Also very much personality wise, I'm calm, collected and quiet, and Leah can be all over the place bouncing around and giggling. She is a very bubbly person, one that is hard to bring down. A complete social butterfly that texts between classes and does homework last minute.

I am, and always have been, very dedicated to my school work. I want to be able to get a scholarship into any school I want to attend, and if I don't get a scholarship, I have money I am putting away for myself. I knew that my father at one point had a fund for college put away for me, but who the hell knows what happened to that. I work hard mostly because I want to be able to graduate early.

I still get along with Sue for the most part, I think she feels sympathetic towards me, and I knew that Seth didn't really understand my relationship, or non-relationship, with my dad. Leah never said anything about it or questions it. It is what it is, that's all. Jake is generally quiet and keeps to himself. He's kind of like me.

As I headed downstairs after getting dressed for school, I saw breakfast already made and my dad was sitting at the table with scrambled eggs and coffee. I grabbed myself a cup of coffee, pouring myself a big steaming glass. I'd only gotten three hours of sleep last night, so I needed something to keep me up.

Sue said a quiet 'hello' to me, and I replied back quietly. She was always polite and nice to me, and I was the same towards her. Yes, we never actually talk, but I still knew she was a nice person.

As of right now my own mother is living in Jacksonville, Florida, much farther away then she used to in Arizona. As of recently she has re-married to a major league baseball player who is thirty years old. I wasn't surprised that my mother picked someone younger.

He was definitely a young one, considering my mother's age, but that was my mom for you. Phil is alright. He is a bit finicky, and uptight, but whatever made my mother happy was alright with me. Phil definitely doesn't get along well with my dad. With Phil on the Marlins baseball team, and my father a diehard Mariners fan they clash a lot not only baseball wise, but Phil is very different from Charlie.

My mother knows how my father treats me, and on some of her visits I've heard them talk about it. The conversation always ends with Charlie telling her to drop it. Even though my mother is flighty and not very often around, I knew that she felt awful about how everything worked out with Charlie and I, and she tries to make up for it.

I was okay with it though. Once I graduated I would be gone. Until then; I was hanging on a string.

I flicked my lip ring with my tongue. I had only gotten two piercings since my lip ring, which are two on my left cartilage. Recently I'd been thinking about a tongue ring. I had connections to get it done but I hadn't decided if I wanted to go through with it.

For a short amount of time around the time my father had gotten remarried, I had stopped smoking cigarettes. I took it back up in my sophomore year when I started hanging out with James more often. Charlie never says anything when he sees me smoking outside. After all, he doesn't care what I do anymore. He doesn't care when I come home at five in the morning, or when I don't come home at all.

I still smoke blunts with James, which is something Charlie doesn't know. It's not like I would be smoking marijuana outside of the house anyways. I may be careless about everything that goes on around my house, but I knew that it wouldn't be right.

James get's my situation, and usually we will have a blunt in his van or at his house. He doesn't do cocaine, or any heavy drugs. I knew that if he was into all of that shit I wouldn't be hanging around him. But he is still a drug dealer, despite it all.

Of course, smoking pot isn't great for someone, but it's not a big deal. It makes me feel like the stress of everything just falls right off my shoulders, and I can relax and focus on feeling good. Nothing else matters. I forget about everything going on at my home life, and the stress of working hard to get out of here.

Even though I still smoke pot sometimes, I am still friends with Angela and Jess, along with Angela's boyfriend Ben. For awhile I was distant from my friends at school, but eventually I started talking to them again, apologizing for my actions. They don't know I still do pot, I'd told them I have, but not that I do it now. I didn't want to risk anybody knowing and letting it slip. I am not out of control with it; obviously my friends would know if I got high at school, I do it responsibly at least

With a deep sigh I took a last swig of coffee, and somewhat listened to Sue and my father's quiet muttering near the kitchen table.

Today I was dressed in a pair of dark wash skinny jeans that were tight on my skinny legs, Angela would call them scrawny. My shirt was a tank top that crossed in the back, and white with a cool grey design on the front. I had my hair down straight in its usual choppy style but somewhat pulled back with bobby pins, and I had on a pair of black flats that had silver studs on top of them. My makeup was just simple dark silver that kind of sparkled, with black eyeliner on the top and bottom, a little thick as usual. I had on some foundation for my deathly white skin, making me look somewhat alive, and a little bit of special makeup powder under my eyes to cover the purple under my eyes from only three hours of sleep last night. Of course the beginning of the week started out with me tired. I finished off my outfit with my red chain heart necklace, leather jacket with silver studs and black school bag/satchel.

It's April 2nd today; Monday.

Apparently starting this week were three new kids that have just recently moved here from Chicago, and ironically, James does know them. The last name I recall is Cullen, James has said it a few times in passing. When there are new kids coming to school, generally it's the biggest news ever at Forks. It's a big deal to everybody. I don't understand the fuss. Then again, nothing exciting ever happens so Forks looks for any reason to be excited.

When James was around fourteen years old, he was uprooted from Chicago and moved here with his family. He actually was best friends with one of them, to which I can't remember the name for the life of me, but I think it's something kind of old school and not heard much of these days.

I've heard around that their father is a surgeon, and I wondered why they decided to move here, must have been a good promotion at the hospital or some shit, because I would definitely not choose to move here myself, it must suck for their kids to go from a big city of Chicago to a small town Forks I imagined.

James had told me that his friend was a senior, as was his brother and younger sister who is a sophomore. I wondered how the brothers were both same grade. James never mentioned them being twins, or a merged family possibly? Adopted?

Realizing that I was analyzing shit that probably isn't my business, I finished my coffee and put the empty mug in the dishwasher, and grabbed the keys to my old dark blue Chevy. I had gotten it from Billy Black, one of my dad's good fishing friends on the reservation, he'd been giving it away a few months ago and my dad got it for me. It was the only nice gesture he'd done for me, but I think he did it because of how Sue had to always drop me off at work and pick me up. I had re-painted the old thing and fixed up the leather and it was my baby. It ran a little bit slow, but I was cool with it.

Leah and Jake were already gone, and had taken the seven fifteen bus. Seth was gone by seven twenty on the junior high bus. Generally they leave for school earliest they can to hang out with friends or some shit.

I walked out of the kitchen without a word and went outside to my car. I started it up and headed to Forks High School, ready to begin another week. Next week was Spring Break, and I wasn't exactly looking forward to it. Hopefully I would spend most of my time with my friends instead of at home. The air was chill, and it was not raining, but of course cloudy. I pulled into the parking lot five minutes later and parked in my usual space and stepped out of the car.

I noticed the new kids immediately; they were very hard to miss when people were flocking towards them like moths to a flame. Two new shiny cars in the lot really showed that they had money. There was a huge black hummer that was really fucking shiny and state of the air, and a shiny silver Volvo parked right next to it, it looked brand new and perfectly waxed. The three of them were standing somewhat together, talking to students who were probably introducing themselves. I saw Jessica Stanley there, a good friend of mine. She's really nice to everyone and all around friendly, so I have no doubt she would be talking to them and welcoming them to the school.

When I saw the huge burly man, I was shocked by his size, not in height, but the rest of him. He definitely worked out a lot, and his arms were like twice the size of my thighs, muscles straining against the sleeves of the t-shirt he wore. His hair was short, a buzz cut but it was obviously a really dark brown, and I could see hazel eyes, and dimples on his cheeks. He probably roughly stood at six feet tall, maybe six two at the tallest.

Next to him was a shorter girl, probably just reaching five feet, and she had the really dark brown hair, almost black, but it was in a pixie cut and stuck up in different directions perfectly. She looked very fashion forward with her clothing, a very updated wardrobe with the highest fashions. Her eyes I think were also brown from what I could tell. I grabbed my bag and slammed the door of my truck shut and stepped forward.

Then I saw what I imagined was the other Cullen son. I was star struck.

He was pretty tall; I am sure about three or four inches taller than his burly brother. I saw he was also like really skinny, his legs were very tall and thin, and he had a thin torso, but I could see a tad bit of muscle. His arms were long, too, and his fingers also long, and slim like the rest of him. He didn't look creepy or anything, he was definitely in proportion with his body, but he was just really lanky and skinny. I looked at his face and just about had a heart attack. He was beautiful, just damn beautiful. His face was perfectly angled and his jaw was a little narrow, a perfect nose, perfect cheekbones, and what I was shocked by was the brilliant emerald green his eyes were.

His hair was this odd bronze shade, and it was really different and cool. It stuck up and literally looked he rolled out of bed and ran his fingers through it. I liked the look.

I also took notice that on his right ear he had four cartilage, rim (or helix), piercings. On his lip he had a ring that went off towards the left on the bottom lip, and I noticed there was another next to it.

Damn.

" Whoa, _those _are the Cullen's?" I heard Angela say from next to me.

" I think so." I said, half dazed.

" You are so going to go for the tall skinny one. Christ, he has like really small thighs, like the size of my bicep."

He was wearing skinny jeans; they were an ash kind of color and looked kind of tight, but not too tight. He had on a white v-neck shirt, it was fitted, and a black pea coat over it, he looked put together in a way, but with some kind of style of his own. His shoes were just flat black shoes that were probably van brand, but they weren't the usual chunky gym shoe one would picture, whole different style

" I couldn't be that damn lucky, let's go."

Angela laughed and I sighed and jogged up the stairs towards the front entrance of the school.

" Bella, watch out!"

Suddenly I felt myself crash into a hard body and I flew back on my ass on the step, smacking into Angela's legs and almost bringing her with me, except she was able to grab the railing. The concrete hurt like a bitch and I let out a painful grunt. When I looked up I saw the tall, skinny bronze haired boy standing there looking apologetic.

" Fuck, are you alright? I didn't mean to knock you on your ass." Even with the swearing, his voice was still the most beautiful voice I've ever heard.

He stared at me with a weird expression. It was almost...Lust? I had no idea but he looked attracted to me in some way, his pupil's very dilated; either that or he was on something. Everything in the world seemed to just still as we watched each other. I didn't want to look away from those piercing green eyes. They captivated me.

I scraped my teeth against my lip ring and he reached out for my hand to help me. I grasped his hand and felt sparks shoot up my arm. He helped me up, dropped my hand, and I brushed my pants off with my hands

As I stood next to him, I saw that I was probably about a foot shorter than him.

" It's alright."

I would have a huge bruise on my ass. I knew it.

" Are you okay?" he asked.

I nodded, " Yeah, fine."

With another reassuring smile I gripped my bag and walked up the rest of the stairs, slightly embarrassed at my stupidity. Once Angela and I got inside of the school building, she grabbed onto my arm and gripped it tightly, leaning towards me to whisper in my ear quietly.

" He totally wanted to bang you."

I rolled my eyes at her. " Okay."

" You saw how he was looking at you. I bet it was the lip ring, probably turned him on."

" Sure, Ange."

" Oh, you saw it."

" He's a teenage guy. He'd go for anything with legs and a p-"

" Okay, I get it. But you should go for him. He's hot."

" Got to get to my locker before first period. See you at lunch." I stated, ending the conversation before it took off further.

" Aw, don't be mean. I love you, Bella."

I rolled my eyes once again at her and walked off towards my locker on the top floor. I walked up the stairs, slowly treading my way there down the halls. The school is kind of small, not that bad, but there really aren't many people around here anyways. Let's face it, this town will always be fucking small and in thirty years the population will still be under four thousand.

When I got to my locker I grabbed my books and headed off to my first class of the day: English Literature, which is also one of my favorite classes.

I always enjoyed this class, reading classic novels was something that I always loved. Romeo and Juliet, Wuthering Heights, The Scarlet Letter, Hamlet. I couldn't get enough of them, and most of the books; I read over and over. Wuthering Heights has always been a personal favorite of mine; the spine on that book is probably the most worn out of all of them. I have a whole bunch of classics on my bedroom shelf, ones I've read for school, and ones just for fun. Most of them went into the same category. Generally I spend most of my time reading novels when I am at home. It keeps me busy, and keeps my mind from wandering.

Right now we are reading The Scarlet Letter, even if I have read it before I have no issues having to read it again and analyzing. Not that I have a fucking choice unless I want a zero. But I bet I could pass without even reading it again. I had this class with my other friend Jess, but with the already assigned seats as per usual, she was basically across the room in the front.

I sat next to stuck up, bleach blonde Tanya Denali. She has always been the schools biggest bitch, and personally, I hate her for my own reasons. I don't hate her because she is popular, and guys are all over her.

When we were in junior high her and her best friend, Rosalie Hale cornered me in the girl's bathroom once when I had been washing my hands.

Tanya held me down while Rosalie pulled a pocket knife to my wrist, threatening me with it. She said she was going to make it look like I had cut myself, as payback for something I had no idea she was talking about. I guess it was a good idea I wore my black docs because I kicked that girl in the knee so hard, and fucking elbowed Denali in her nose and ran out of there like a bat out of hell. They got suspended for four days because of that stunt, and it would be in their school file.

Bitches should have thought before messing with me.

I sat down in my seat and set my bag down on the table.

Tanya then came strutting in, wearing the shortest pink mini skirt I have ever seen, typical her. I could see her fucking thong strings on the side pulled up above her skirt, but hey, at least she had enough decency to even wear underwear. She had on a pair of red pointed toe shoes with a pointed heel that could kill a guy, and her shirt was white and very tight, a v-neck and a thick, pink leather that was pink around her waist. This was typical attire. Even in the rain and cold weather.

Mr. Berty walked in and all were silent then. We were watching parts of the Scarlet Letter, and it was really kind of boring compared to the book. What we read, we watched, not the entire thing through. It was clear if a student wasn't reading a book because a lot of the movies based off aren't all right, I guess it comes in handy

I watched the movie, or at least looked like it, and instead was reading the next assigned chapter underneath my desk. Once class was over I went off to Trig, and then World History, another one of my favorite classes. I enjoyed most History; it doesn't really bore me like other classes.

After that I had Spanish, next was my lunch period. I met Angela in the lunch room and we sat down at our usual table with Ben and Jess who were waiting for us. I grabbed an apple and made a small salad from the salad bar, and got a bottle of lemonade from the machine. When I sat down Angela had Ben next to her and they were giving each other all lovey dovey eyes.

" You guys are gross." Jess said.

" Oh, shush. Don't be so very obviously jealous, Jess."

I rolled my eyes and stabbed a cucumber with my fork. I speared it into my mouth and glared at her. I felt my phone buzzing in my pocket and I grabbed it and looked at the screen after opening the message.

_Message from: James Grahm_

_Hey, my car ten minutes?_

_Got smokes and blunts._

_-JG_

Once I swallowed I took a swig of my lemonade. I quickly finished with my salad and apple, ignoring their stares as to why I was now in such an obvious hurry.

" Got a text, I'll see you guys later."

" What? Bella, come on not again." Jess whined as Angela shook her head at me.

" I'll spend tomorrows lunch with you, the entire time, I promise."

I headed towards the school parking lot for a quick smoke with James. His pitch black van was started up and running and I knocked on the side door before getting in. He was smoking a cigarette, leaning back against the inside walls of the car. His back of the van was a typical style; shag carpet and random pillows flittering around.

He handed me a cigarette and lit it for me. I took a deep drag and laid down on my back with a sigh.

" Hey, you." he said in his rough voice.

" Hey, thanks for this."

James smiled, " I saw you get knocked on your ass by Edward."

Edward! I knew his name was something like that. I kind of liked it; it was old school and classic.

I rolled my eyes, " Yeah."

" He came up to me and asked about you today. We have Algebra together."

" Cool. Must be nice to have a good friend around here, huh?"

" Yeah, he's really chill. I think you two would get along good. He's eighteen."

I looked at him skeptically and he nodded at me. " Well, what did he say about me?"

He put out my cigarette for me and passed me the blunt. Usually, I wouldn't do this at school but two drags wouldn't do anything. I took a hit and passed it to James, I felt slightly relaxed and I liked the feeling. I loved it.

" Wanted to know who you were."

" What'd you say?" I asked, taking the blunt again and taking another puff.

" Bella Swan; wild and freaky between the sheets."

I slapped his shoulder and laughed, leaning against a pillow and laughing at his stupidity. He was teasing me, I knew it. I took one last hit and handed it back over to him, wanting more but knowing this wasn't the place.

" Nah, I just told him that you were real cool and chill. Fun to hang out with, and can be hyper as all hell."

" Hyper as all hell? Really? You couldn't be more off target if you tried."

" You love me. And you can get that way when you're drunk off your ass.."

" You bet, I've got to go though. Can I?..."

I passed him a few twenties and he handed me a blunt he's already made. He was generous with me though, having no issue giving me one of his already rolled blunts for like sixty bucks. James has the really good shit, and usually his lowest price on a bag is like ninety for the smallest amount, but he's like my brother, and he cuts me a break.

He kissed my cheek and closed the van door, pulling his pants up that had fallen to almost halfway down his ass, exposing his purple boxers

" You need to get a belt." I teased him.

" Stop telling me shit I know, kiddo. I'll give you a call tonight where to meet me to grab your cigarette's, cool?"

" Mhm, wear a belt." I said, smacking his hip.

He rolled his eyes, and started heading towards the school. I went to my car real quick and stashed the blunt for later. Sometimes I loitered around the park by my house while I smoked it, but never in the house. I rarely smoked alone at all; James is usually there with me. I sprayed myself with some body spray, strawberry scented, and got out. I didn't want the smell on me.

When I shut my truck door I turned around and saw Edward Cullen standing many feet away from me against a silver Volvo, he was smoking a cigarette, and his eyes were on me. I grabbed my jacket and slipped it on and headed back towards the school, avoiding his gaze as I walked past him.

Suddenly I felt him walking up beside me, keeping similar pace as mine. When I got into the school, I headed to my locker and grabbed my Biology book. Then I was off to Mr. Malina's class and took my usual seat, the one next to me empty, as always. I set my bag down on the table and leaned forward against the table.

That's when he walked in.

Mr. Malina stood up from his desk and strode towards him, giving him a hand shake.

" Class, this is Edward Masen. He is a new student I expect you to be nice to him. Mr. Masen you can take a seat next to Miss. Swan over there."

Masen? I was suddenly very confused by this.

He sat next to me, and I still saw a hint of that look he'd been giving me before. I looked forward at the teacher, trying to ignore his gaze. He wasn't even ashamed to be staring at me. I flipped my book open like Mr. Malina requested, and we were all handed a sheet that goes with the section. He claimed to have paperwork to get together and for us to read it on our own.

I was actually in a Senior Biology class; I'd actually done this shit in hopes of graduating early if it were possible. I broke my back to excel in school, and I've taken summer school classes every year purposely to help gain extra credits. This summer I was definitely going to see if it could be possible, and then I could graduate in August, right before my eighteenth Birthday. It would be too late to apply for college, I'd maybe be able to enroll and start in January if possible.

I moved my leg up to put my foot on one of the bars that was on the stool, and I felt it bump into...Edward's. His eyes shot to mine, looking at me as if I had done it on purpose. I murmured a quiet 'sorry' and put my foot in the bar, gripping my pen in hand.

Glancing over at him, he was...beautiful. The overwhelming urge to just jump into his lap and attack him was weighing down in me. I shook my head out of my thoughts and concentrated on Biology.

He's just so...

I had no idea what was going on with me. I've never had a crush on someone like this before. Something inside of me just couldn't help it, and I didn't even know him. By looking at him something screamed dangerous, passionate and dare I say...sex.

Yeah, I wanted him.

But I bet every other girl at Forks High wants him too.

**Authors Note- That was the first chapter, and let me say there is much more to come. This is barely the beginning! Got any questions, let me know, and I will reply to ALL reviews!**

**Let me know your thoughts!**


	2. Still Breathing

**Authors Note- Hello, so I know I am posting super late at night. I've been gone all day, and all that other stuff, but here it is! Thanks for all the positive feedback for last chapter, I appreciate it so much! Keep it coming!**

**Disclaimer- S. Meyer owns all things Twilight.**

**Chapter Song: Still Breathing by: Mayday Parade**

~\\~

BPOV

~\\~

When I finally got out of that classroom, I had grabbed my bag and was out the second the bell rang, not giving _him_ a second glance. He'd been staring at me almost the entire fucking class period, and I really didn't know why. When I got out of there I was off to gym and trying my hardest not to think about earlier.

I bounded into the locker room and went to my locker, fiddling with the combination before getting it open. I grabbed the gold shorts and blue v-neck t-shirt that had the FHS logo on the breast pocket. I slipped on the shirt quickly and put on the shorts. I laced up my puma's that were kept in there, and headed into the gym, my hair up in a ponytail and swinging behind me.

Luckily we didn't do much. We did a little bit of volleyball, and I still managed to end up getting hit by fucking Mike Newton who aimed it at my ass, purposely. It hurt like a bitch, and I would definitely make it a goal to get him back later. Everyone was laughing over it, but I am sure my glare was what shut them the fuck up. I noticed that Edward was also in this class, and by no surprise, he was very athletic. He was the only thing that kept our team still going. His long arms easily reached up to serve the ball.

When the dreaded gym was over, I changed into my usual clothes, put on some deodorant and headed back out to my locker to grab my jacket, phone and keys. I was suddenly hit by Leah who had run into me accidentally.

" Oh, sorry Bella."

" It's alright." I murmured quietly.

" So... Rosalie Hale is such a biotch." Leah said.

" What'd she do?"

" I was talking to the new kid, Emmett Cullen. And she just came up and wrapped herself around him like he was hers. I was just talking to him, and he seemed to kind of be into me. Then she just draped over him, and he loved it."

She leaned against the locker next to me and sighed, banging her head on it and closing her eyes.

" Just forget about it. I wouldn't suggest messing with Rosalie."

" That's not even the point, Bella." she grumbled, " Never mind. You don't get it."

She spun on her heal and started to walk away from me with a sour look on her face. I didn't know what to say to her, I knew that there was no way a senior would go for a sophomore, unless he is really desperate for a girlfriend. Honestly, it wasn't my concern or place to say anything. And if Rosalie staked her claim, it wouldn't be worth it to mess with her.

I slammed my locker and turned around, running hard into a body for the second time today. Three times if you counted Leah running into me.

This was becoming a regular occurrence apparently. I collided and then hit the lockers, slamming back into them and almost smacking my head on it. When I looked up I saw, who I guessed was, Emmett Cullen. He was the bigger guy, and it was no wonder Rosalie Hale was into him.

He is all fucking muscles.

Her previous boyfriend, Royce King, was built in a similar way. He moved down to Florida a year ago with his parents when his father opened a law firm and he had to move. I don't know what happened with them, I would guess they are over but I don't know any fucking details.

" Woah, little one. You, okay?" he asked in a rough voice, gripping my shoulders to steady me.

" I'm not little." I grumbled in offence, gripping my bag tighter.

He still had a hold of my shoulders, and I had no fucking clue why he did. I quickly twisted around and ripped from his awkward grasp, walking down the hall towards the exit. I didn't know if he had no clue what personal space is, or if he thought I was interested for some fucked up reason.

I jogged down the steps towards my car and saw Leah leaning against my truck with her friend, Janie, standing next to her. They seemed to be in a heated discussion about something. I was suddenly stopped by Rosalie Hale, with Tanya Denali flanked by her side; as per usual.

" What the hell do you want, Hale?"

" Well, Swan. " she sneered, " I want you, to make sure that your... immature, sophomore step sister, will stay away from Emmett Cullen. I've already claimed him. And there is no way that he'll be interested in a little girl, so make sure she stays away from him; or else.."

" Whatever. And if you even try to pull something with her...I'll fuck you up. So don't even try."

Christ, they'd only been here for school hours and I was already dealing with shit. I knew that I would have to look out for Leah, because the girl can be relentless. She, luckily, hasn't had any encounters with them, which I've made sure of, but with her wanting to get this guys attention...Rosalie would embarrass her or do something that would be awful, and Tanya would be her sidekick, as always.

" What could you possibly do?"

" A fuck lot more than just a kick in the knee and an elbow to the nose." I growled, shoving past her and walking to my car.

When I got there Leah was staring at me, " What was that about?"

" Fighting your battles for you. Do me a favor and stay away from Emmett, okay? I don't need this drama just because new guys come to Forks."

She sighed, " Fine, fine. Sorry, Bella... But that other brother is so hot. In like a total bad boy way, no way Rosalie is after him!"

They both got into the car, Leah in the middle of the bench seat. I grabbed my bag and put it between us, not wanting to drive with it on my lap. They started blabbing on about the Cullen's, and I grabbed my bag, taking my pack of cigarettes out of it.

James gets me my cigarettes for me, since I am not technically of age. I'll usually give James like fifteen bucks at the beginning of the month and he'll pick up as many packs as he can get. I smoke recently about twice a day. I know that I can stop because I'm not very addicted, but it takes the edge off.

I opened the window and lit up my cigarette, I kept my arm hanging out of the window so that the smell wouldn't be trapped in my car.

" So, Bella, you saw Edward, didn't you?" Janie asked excitedly.

I laughed, " Yeah, I did. He sits next to me in Biology. Therefore, my partner."

" He is so hot! I am so jealous of you. And he has a lip piercing, and I saw a shiny silver ball on his tongue, so he must also have a tongue piercing. He was talking with that short girl in the halls; I think it's his sister or something, because they came to school together. Unless it's like...his girlfriend. I wonder how that works out; she is like barely five feet tall. But it can't be, unless she lives with them or whatever. He's like six three or something! Bella, you should totally go for him if he's single. With the piercings and stuff, and the skinny jeans...At least someone I like could have that deliciousness!" Janie rambled out.

" It's their first day, give them a break."

" That's code for love at first sight. She wants him."

" I want him? So I can do what with him, Leah?" I asked suggestively, waiting to see her answer.

She rolled her eyes at me and continued talking to Janie.

I finished off my cigarette and shut the window, pulling up to the house. Both she and Janie got out, and I reached over to my glove compartment and grabbed my blunt. I hid it in my pocket and slid out of the car with my bag in hand. I jogged up the steps to the house and headed inside, setting my bag by the stairs and went to the kitchen, grabbing a coke from the fridge.

I made myself a sandwich with some leftover rotisserie chicken from last night's dinner, avocado slices and some miracle whip. I put it on whole wheat bread and grabbed my bag as I headed back upstairs.

When I opened up the door to my bedroom, I sighed. I loved my bedroom, and I cherished it especially with all of the stuff that goes on around here. The privacy is nice to say the least. I generally am always up here anyways. I never really feel the need to spend time with everybody.

I dropped my bag on my bed, my sandwich plate on my desk, and laid down over my mattress.

Unlike the light pink it was years ago, it's a deep dark blue color, and the walls are basically covered in posters. For music posters, I have everything from Chiodos to The Runaways. And my movie posters vary from Tim Burton movie posters to School of Rock. Most of my movie posters are horror movie posters.

My flooring is dark wood, with a blue rug in the middle of the room.. My bed is a queen size, and is on the wall of the door to the right. All of my sheets are black, and my comforter is the same with white design in it. My pillows are just white with the same design in black, with my favorite dark purple blanket tossed in the middle. My end table on the side of my bed has a black wood frame build, but it's a glass top, and another shelf on the bottom. My dresser is the same black wood, but all black wood obviously. It matches my headboard, tying things together. My desk is the same glass, black wooden frame design as my end table, but obviously taller and longer. I have a simple, worn folding chair, with blankets tossed over it to make it more bearable to sit on.

I tossed my cigarette's on my end table and stashed my blunt with my other one in my bottom drawer of my dresser, it was in a tiny box that I'd gotten a necklace from Angela in.

I didn't have any homework, with how slow Biology was, I did my History homework, and Trig was easily finished during Biology class hours. Usually the teacher gives us ten minutes at the end of the class period to get as much done as we can, and I generally finish it all.

With a sigh I grabbed my phone, responding to a text from Jess I'd gotten. She wanted to know if she could stay over Tuesday night because her parents were going to a charity function in Seattle and staying the night there, so she didn't want to be alone.

I work part time at Forks Diner in my usual free time. It's a main place where the local high school kids hang out at, at least, the hours that I usually work there. I only work Wednesday through Thursday. Wednesday through Friday I work from four in the afternoon, to ten thirty, and on Saturdays I open up the restaurant at six and work until one.

I get all the hours that I can get. Four out of seven days a week is good. Forks Diner generally isn't constantly busy, and there are other workers that need hours, but it does pay nicely and I've had a good amount of money saved up since I started working there the summer before I turned sixteen. My mother has a college fund for me; something that she says she always adds money into every week. I'm very grateful that she's done that for me all these years.

I threw my bag over by my desk and sat in my chair, booting up my laptop to check...

Facebook.

A new habit of mine that I am not proud of, but it isn't so bad as to where I have facebook mobile or some shit. I looked at my profile picture; it was when I had my mullet last August. I did it early for Halloween. I fucking loved my hair like that, but I grew it out. Everyone said I was a damn replica of Joan Jett, I took pride it in.

I rifled through status', and something then possessed me to type in 'Edward Masen' in the little search bar. He came up right away, even though there were no mutual friends. I clicked on him and looked at his picture.

Damn.

He was sitting on a bench, large city buildings in the background, and he had a cigarette in his mouth. He had on a pair of skinny jeans, and a black v-neck t-shirt, exposing his long, skinny arms. Covering his eyes were aviators, and he was though clearly looking past the camera person. I noticed in the back was the Sears tower.

I clicked on his pictures and there were about thirty of him. I noticed a particular one that was about two years old and he was sitting on a very expensive looking leather couch, and next to him was a beautiful, smiling blonde. She looked radiant, and he looked happy with her. I wondered if they broke up before he moved here or some shit because his relationship status was single.

Before I could even continue that thought, I just clicked away to my main newsfeed. After responding to a few comments and messing around, I logged out and checked my mail. I saw an E-mail from my mother there that was sent last night.

It was the usual message, and I responded to her, trying to match her enthusiasm. I have no idea how my mom was mostly smiles all the time, but I was happy she was happy. She was talking about Easter, which is the eighth and is this upcoming Sunday. She and Phil always fly out for Easter and we spend it together. My mother and Sue get along okay. My mother and Charlie are civil with each other. I know that it's not my father's decision for her to visit on Easter, but she wants to see me and that's how it worked out.

I heard a knock on my door and I looked towards it just as Leah walked in.

" Hey, Janie and I finished our homework is it cool if we go to her house?"

" How are you planning to get back?"

She smiled brightly and I sighed. " Fine, whatever. Call me like twenty minutes before so I am prepared."

" Sure thing, bye Bella!"

About ten minutes later I went downstairs, after finishing my sandwich so that I could clean my dish. Seth was watching television on the couch, and Jake was staring at his homework looking completely and utterly bored.

" Having trouble?

" No, I just don't want to do it."

I nodded and let him be. Sometimes he would let me help him if he had a problem. Otherwise he was just very quiet and reserved.

I walked out of the kitchen with water bottle in hand and headed towards the foyer. I sat out in the front and lit another cigarette, taking a deep drag. I saw Sue pull up in her small Corolla and she hopped out of the car with a bag in hand.

" Hello, Bella."

" Hi...Um, Leah is at her friend's house. I told her I'd pick her up later."

Sue nodded, " Okay. Thank you."

She went inside, and I followed after a minute or two and went into the kitchen. We were apparently having chicken for dinner; with garlic lemon flavored breading. She had bought red potatoes to make mashed potatoes with; it was actually one of my personal favorites. I preferred them over regular, they had more flavor.

Seth packed up his bag and headed upstairs to do whatever, and Jake was sitting at the table, groaning because he wanted to be done with it. This was a regular occurrence.

I headed upstairs to my bedroom, and I heard my phone going off when I reached the top of the steps. I quickly reached it and saw it was Angela. I answered the call and brought it to my ear with a hello on my lips.

" Hey, so, Ben is throwing a Spring Break party on Friday, and he just made these plans. You're coming right? I mean, I know its last minute but it's cool, right?"

" Damn it...I don't know, my mom and Phil are probably flying in Friday. My dad won't give a fuck so I'll probably end up going."

She laughed, " I know, and if I didn't love Ben so much I wouldn't have agreed to help him grocery shop."

" Mmhm."

" Don't be jealous. I bet you at the end of the year you'll have someone."

I rolled my eyes, " Okay, Ange. I'll just talk to you later."

" I was just kidding about the jealous part, Bella."

" I don't fucking care about it. I'll just talk to you later." I said nonchalantly

" Whatever then, bye."

She hung up before I could respond and I tossed my phone on my bed. Angela was notorious for shoving her relationship with Ben in my face, she does it to Jess, and I don't know if that's her fucking insecurity talking or what, but it pisses me off. It's a high school relationship, not a lifetime commitment.

I itched to have another cigarette, but I had my few. I groaned and turned on some Emarosa, distracting me for the time being. I grabbed my laptop and pulled up facebook again, I went stalking around to keep me entertained for awhile until I decided to crack open the Scarlet Letter and read a few chapters.

I must have found myself lost in the text because before I knew it hours had passed and I heard Sue calling for dinner.

I headed downstairs a few minutes later and saw everybody already seated. My father gave me a glance quickly before looking away. The polished wood table was set perfectly, and I took my seat next to where Leah usually is seated. I thanked Sue quietly for dinner and she smiled at me.

" So, how was work?" Sue asked my father.

" It was fine."

I knew that my dad always ignored me and acted uninterested, but with Sue, Jake, Seth and Leah, he acts like he used to with me; before my mom left. Obviously something happened, but I wouldn't say anything.

" Something happen?"

Suddenly Charlie turned towards me, giving me a look that was something between a glare and something else I couldn't pinpoint. I froze in my seat and looked over at him, wondering why in the hell he would be looking at me like this.

" I found cigarette's tossed on our lawn today. Would you happen know anything about that, Isabella?"

" No."

I never left the filters or anything on our lawn. They were always thrown out and taken care of.

" Really? Because last time I checked you are the only one smoking in this house."

" That doesn't mean that I'm throwing them on our lawn. It could be anybody in the neighborhood."

" Anybody?"

I held back my anger, " I'm not stupid enough to do that. I do have respect. You raised me for fourteen years after all." I put emphasis on the _fourteen _to make a point.

He didn't say anything after that. I finished the rest of my dinner and stood up to clean my dishes. I honestly didn't even want to fucking be here anyways. The table was quiet as I walked upstairs to my bedroom. As I did, I heard a long sigh.

" Can't you just let it alone, Charlie? I told you that Bella didn't do it."

" How would you know?"

" Because despite what you might think, Bella is a good kid."

" Yeah, I bet a lot of good kids sneak back into their house at five o' clock in the morning after doing god knows what all night."

" Sometimes I really wonder what the issue is between both of you." Sue stated.

" Drop it."

Sue wasn't the only one that wondered what the issue was.

I paused on the stairs and remembered that I probably had to say something about my mother and Phil. She'd given me the details on their flight and Charlie always ends up picking them up. I took a step down and stood near the table.

" Renee and Phil are going to be getting in at around seven on Friday night. She said she'd call you for more details."

He didn't acknowledge that I even said anything. I went upstairs directly and shut the door behind me, sitting on the bed with a deep sigh.

I hung around my room and read a bit longer before Leah had given me a call. I put a hoodie on and grabbed my keys. I was heading to the grocery store real quick to pick up some Amp and Jalapeño Fritos to sate my odd cravings.

I then got a call from James as I was in the grocery store at the checkout line with my items.

" At the Speedway by the grocery store."

" Very convenient, I'm just checking out at the grocery store." I stated, sliding my debit and punching in my pin number.

" Only the most convenient for you, my darling."

" Oh, of course, babe." I said sarcastically, " I'll be there in five."

I put my phone in my pocket and I suddenly felt someone staring at me. I looked behind me and saw nobody, shaking my head and calling myself stupid mentally; I grabbed my bag and thanked the cashier.

I drove across the street to the gas station and saw James' van. He must have been inside so I headed into the gas station, as I did, I saw Edward Masen standing by the counter to my right, he was sliding a ten over to the guy working behind the counter. A pack of Marlboro's went into his direction. I saw James standing next to him with a bag, saying something to him that I didn't catch; my eyes were on the cigarette pack.

He smoked the same exact kind as I did. Weird.

I was suddenly pulled outside by James. He stood on the sidewalk and I handed him a twenty, he handed me a bag, and I was still slightly dazed.

" I put something extra in there for ya, Bella." he said.

I looked at him warily, " James, I don't have time for your antics." I shivered from the cold, my sweatshirt not doing much.

He draped his hoodie over my shoulders, and I looked in the bag. I saw an unfamiliar purple box and reached in to pick it up, James wore a very funny expression on his face, like this was so fucking funny and he was containing a laugh.

When I looked at the front of the box, I almost threw it at him. It was a box of Trojan, Magnum XL condoms. Just then that was when Edward Masen decided to walk out and saw what I was holding. He almost looked amused.

" Your such a fucking jerk." I yelled at James with a laugh, shoving at him and putting the box in the bag.

" We could put them to use if you want."

" Then you better go get a refund, these are way too big for you."

He gave me a light shove and lit up a cigarette.

" Want me to introduce you to him?" he asked quietly

" What? No. Don't make it wei-"

" Hey, Edward, come over here." James said just before Edward got in the car.

" James, I have to pick Leah up from a friends." I said, almost begging. " And my night has been bad enough."

Suddenly Edward was in front of me, just a few feet away. I was almost in fucking awe of this guy, something about him just drew me right in. I wanted to just-

" Edward, this is, Bella. Bella, this is Edward."

" Yeah, we met earlier. Sorry for the whole bumping into you, I didn't mean to fucking do that, I was so distracted and shit. I was in a damn hurry as always."

I smiled awkwardly, " No, it's cool."

James put his arm around my neck and pulled me to his side. I poked him in the ribs and he just laughed at my attempt to get him off.

" Well, I'll just leave you both to...whatever."

He started to walk away from us, and I flipped James to bird and started walking towards Edward, after all, his car was close to mine. I caught up with him and he looked in my direction with a quirked brow.

" Hey, I'm not together with that douche bag. He just gets me my cigarettes and shit, though he's like a brother. Sorry he made it so awkward."

" It's fine, I don't really give a shit. I guess I kind of assumed anyways by the...contents of your bag that it was something more. Never mind."

" He just did that to get a rise out of me. We aren't..." I trailed off quietly.

He laughed, and it sounded fucking beautiful. Hands down the most amazing sound I've ever heard in my life.

" Definitely. It was really nice talking to you...But I have to get home, just moved in, house a damn mess of boxes and shit."

" Oh, yeah. Sorry for keeping you."

" Don't apologize, it was a pleasure." he said with a smirk as he got into his shiny, silver Volvo.

I was left standing in that parking lot, staring after him like it was a fucking movie.

" Damn, Swan...You've got it bad already." James said, standing beside me.

Yeah, he was right. I had it bad. Real bad.

**Authors Note- I know the chapter is kind of filler, but as I said, their relationship progresses quickly, so I wanted to get in a few details and whatnot.**

**So, what do you think of Charlie? Sue? **

**I try to reply to all reviews, so let know what you think!**


	3. Teenagers

**Authors Note- I know, I know! It seems like when Friday's come around I am super busy and posting last minute. I am so sorry, next week it will be earlier, I promise!**

**Disclaimer- S. Meyer owns all things Twilight.**

**Chapter Song- Teenagers by: My Chemical Romance**

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BPOV

~\\~

" What took you so long?" Leah whined as she got into the truck, slamming the door shut and adjusting her sweatshirt as she relaxed against the seat.

I rolled my eyes at her and put the car back into drive. I pulled out of the driveway and started weaving through the neighborhood streets carefully in the darkness. They didn't have any fucking streetlamps on, which made it harder to see.

" I was picking something up."

" Picking up what?"

" Just a few things. It's nothing."

She grabbed the grocery bag that I had sitting on the ground. Setting it on the seat, she looked inside and saw the pack of Amp Energy and the Fritos. I saw her glance at the other bag inside of it, with the condoms and the cigarette's.

When she grabbed for that bag, I tried to stop her. " Don't look at that."

Before I could grab it she had it. I couldn't very well do anything about it, my hands were on the wheel and driving was more important. I heard her gasp, and then she broke out into loud, obnoxious giggles.

" Condoms? Are you serious, Bella! Who are you having sex with? And who bought the cigarettes for you? Do you have a fake ID?"

" Leah, damnit...I have a friend who buys me the cigarette's, and he bought the condoms as a joke. Don't say a word about it."

" You are such a liar! You're having sex aren't you?"

" It was a joke."

" You said 'he' bought you them."

" Stop, just let it be. Forget about it."

She said nothing afterwards, seeing that I was clearly annoyed with her accusations.

When we got home I grabbed both of the bags and headed inside the house after locking the car. Leah went for the living room and I headed upstairs to my bedroom. I shut the door with my foot when I got in and set my things down on the desk, shedding James' sweatshirt, that he said to return to him tomorrow, and tossing it on my bed.

Making sure the door was locked; I started undressing myself and put on a pair of shorts and t-shirt to sleep in. I put James' sweatshirt back on and booted up my computer and flipped on my TV, putting on an episode of Friends. I opened up an amp and took a large swig, leaning back against my chair.

I heard a knock on my bedroom door and I looked back, seeing Leah standing by the doorframe.

" I'm sorry for looking through your things and making comments."

" It's fine."

She shut the door and sat down on the edge of my bed. " Don't be mad at me, Bella. I was just curious."

" Look, Leah, certain parts of my life are private to others, just like you have your own thing going on sometimes. We are both entitled to our own things that are a secret. Alright?" I said in a calm voice.

" Yeah...I won't say anything about the condoms."

I sighed, " Thanks."

" What are you both talking about?" I heard Sue say as she entered my room.

_Shit!_

" Nothing." Leah said.

" I heard a certain word in this conversation, something that I need to be knowing about, Leah?"

" That 'certain word' has nothing to do with, Leah. So don't worry about it."

I already have a messed up relationship with my father, so why not have Sue on my case also. I didn't want Leah dragged into anything. There was nothing for her to be dragged into.

Leah sent me a grateful look, glad that I was getting her out of it before Sue freaked out about her daughter having condoms. I wished James never bought me those stupid things; I'd definitely have to give him a good tongue lashing tomorrow.

" I'm just going to go to bed, night guys!" Leah exclaimed, hopping off of my bed and out of my room. I heard her footsteps down the stairs and Sue gave me a glance, as if to ask me whether or not it was alright to come into my room. I nodded my head and she took Leah's spot at the end of my bed.

Of course I forgot to hide the condoms, and they were still in the bag on the floor by the side of my bed. I sighed at my stupidity and hoped she wouldn't look at it.

" Mind my asking how the word 'condoms' in a conversation came up with my daughter."

" It has nothing to do with Leah, so don't worry about it."

She didn't say much, as usual, " Okay."

Without another word she left my bedroom. Sue has always been a nice woman, but we don't talk much at all. She's married to my father, and my father is basically done with me. I could see that she was in a hard place. At first she used to try and ask him why it was the way it was, but eventually she gave up.

I surfed around on the internet for a short while before using the washroom, washing my face and brushing my teeth. I headed downstairs, grabbing some water, not wanting to drink too much of the energy drink before bed. I headed back upstairs, set my cell-phone alarm and got into bed.

With a yawn I slumped against my pillows, closing my eyes. The last thing that flashed in my head before falling asleep was bright green eyes and bronze hair.

~\\~

Next Day

~\\~

_...BEEP_

_...BEEP_

_...BEEP_

I groaned and groped for my phone, turning off the obnoxious ringing noise. I rolled onto my stomach and sighed into my pillow, not wanting to get up today and start my routine. When I opened my eyes, the room was still mostly dark, making me sigh once more. My head hurt just a little. I wasn't sure why.

When I sat up, my back cracked slightly. I got out of bed and stretched my arms above my head, feeling my shirt slightly rise. Half asleep, I trekked to my bathroom and turned on the water. I was glad that I had my own bathroom in this house. There's one right next to my dad's room that they share with Seth, and then a powder room on the main floor, and a full bathroom in the basement that was installed.

I turned the water all the way on hot so it would warm up and I locked my bedroom door. I tossed off all of my clothes and stepped into the hot spray. I scrubbed my hair vigorously with my berry scented shampoo, and cleaned my body with my vanilla scented body wash. I shaved my legs nice and smooth, and turned off the water and wrapped a towel around my body, using a smaller towel for my hair.

I washed my face with a scrub, and brushed, flossed and swished around mouth wash in my mouth until the burning of the Listerine subsided. I went into my bedroom and rifled through my drawers, finding a matching grey cotton convertible racer back bra and panty set. I was a little above average in the chest area, but I never complained.

I finished putting on my undergarments and grabbed a pair of boot cut dark wash jeans, and an affliction tank top that's dark grey with a silver design on the front. It's one of my favorite shrits. I grabbed my hoodie with the pouch in front, dark blue and zips half down, and slipped on my white puma's. I wasn't feeling very in the mood to dress up today.

Every once in awhile I like to break out some of my more expensive pieces, most of it is things my mom has bought for me. She liked to send me a lot of designer jeans, dresses, and jewelry. Anything from rings to new things for my cartilage piercing. Recently I've been wearing a hanging blue star for my lower cartilage piercing, and the one above is just a silver stud.

Once I finished dressing I went to the bathroom, blow drying my hair and straightening it. It was pretty shaggy as of right now, mostly choppy. I straightened my side bangs and sprayed in a volumizer. I grabbed one of my black clip bows and used it to pull my bangs back and I clipped it to the top of my head, but gave it just a small poof. I slipped on my silver skull ring and my series of bracelets.

After messing with it for awhile I grabbed my makeup bag, a bit of silver sparkly eye shadow, black eyeliner and some over all mineral veil powder, I was basically done. I put on a bit of mascara to finish. My eyes looked a little shot today, but I had been tossing and turning last night. I grabbed my ray ban aviators and set them on top of my head for now.

I tossed my other clothes in the hamper, realizing I had to do laundry very soon..

I headed downstairs and entered the kitchen. As usual, my father and Sue were in the kitchen together.

I had a glass of orange juice and a piece of cinnamon toast before leaving. I grabbed my bag and made sure my books were inside, and said goodbye to Sue in response to her wishing I have a good day. I took the keys from the hook, and made sure to take James' hoodie with me. It wasn't raining this morning, which I was extremely glad for. I put my aviators down and got into my car.

The ride to school was quick, as it always is, and I hopped out of the car, making sure that it was locked when I did. I slung my school bag over my shoulder and walked across the parking lot, James was by his car, and Edward Masen was right there next to him. I draped James' hoodie over my arm and walked over to them hesitantly, not wanting to bother. The moment James saw me; he made a show of it. He let out a whistle and wrapped his arm around my waist, pulling me to his side.

" Still looking sexy in a hoodie and puma's. Congrats, Bella."

" Not today, James."

He passed me a worried look, " Everything okay?"

I nodded and leaned into him, enjoying the comfort of a friend right now, someone who cared honestly.

" If you weren't just a friend I might have to get into your pants, though, Bella. Bet you're glad you get to hang out with me, eh, Edward? This hot thing will be around."

Edward nodded his head at James and took a drag of his cigarette.

" Well, I'll leave you guys to it, If I am late for Trig then Mr. Harke will give me a fucking detention."

" We gonna have a blunt during lunch?" he asked quietly, but I knew Edward could hear.

Thanks, James. Now Edward probably thinks I am a pothead. I mentally cursed him.

" Maybe a cigarette, I promised my friends I'd sit with them at lunch. So maybe I'll head out ten minutes early at the most. I'll text you."

He nodded and I headed off towards the school, not looking back.

~\\~

By the time lunch had rolled around, I honestly didn't want to be there. Angela didn't meet me as usual, and instead was already sitting with Ben. I think she knew she'd been a bitch on the phone to me last night, and didn't want to face me alone. I realized that when I got in line to get something to eat that I wasn't hungry at all.

Jess walked up to me, flanking my side.

" Hey, you look sick. Something wrong, Bella?" she asked worriedly.

" Uh, I don't think I'm going to eat lunch with you guys. I'm sorry, Jess. I'm just going to get some fresh air, chill in my car for a bit."

" I'm not that hungry either, mind if I join you?"

" Yeah, that's fine." I told her.

We stopped at my locker really quick so that I could grab my keys. Once I felt the colder air, I started to feel better. I was surprised on how suddenly the nausea came on, and it was probably triggered because I'd been upset about Angela.

When I got to my car, I got in, and Jess climbed in also and leaned against the seat, I cracked my window and grabbed my pack of cigarettes.

" Is it alright if I?.." I asked her, taking one out.

" I don't care, Bella, it's cool." she said with an eye roll. " Hey, did something happen last night?"

" My dad."

" He talked to you?" Jess asked.

I lit one up and took a long drag, leaning back against the seat as I nodded.

" Yeah...For the first time in like two weeks now. He thought I was putting cigarette stubs on the front lawn and got angry about it or something...God, Jess, I can't wait to get out of here. On top of that Angela called me last night, and she was fucking shoving Ben in my face, in typical fashion. Ever get sick of it? I mean, I get she was a little insecure previously, but it's just getting fucking annoying right now."

Jess nodded, " I'm sorry about your dad, I wonder why he is such an asshole to you. And I totally hear you about Angela, I mean, it's stupid, you know? It's like, since we don't have a boyfriend we are not as cool. I don't know. Just don't let it get to you, because one day you'll be picking up some lucky guy and she'll shut up." she said, laughing at the end.

I chuckled quietly. " I suddenly can't wait for that day."

" Might be near, Edward Masen, or Cullen, is staring at y-"

" Bella!" I heard a voice say suddenly next to me.

I yelped and saw James leaning against the driver's seat of my car. Jess screamed even louder that I did, and jumped about a foot in the air. I smacked James' arm and glared harshly at them, taking a drag of my cigarette.

" Bella, what is James Grahm doing here?" Jess asked.

" We hang out." I replied cryptically

She quirked a brow at me. " Alrighty then...Well, I'm going to head back to the lunch room, girly. I'll see you later, okay? Keep your head up."

" Sure thing."

Jess gave me a huge all toothy smile and hopped out of the car, shutting the heavy door behind her. I leaned out of my window and smacked James again. Without warning, he had his arms around my waist and he fucking pulled me out. I stumbled and almost fell on my ass.

" Fuck you! I feel like shit today. Don't make it worse."

He chuckled and reached out to smack my ass, but only caught my hip.

" You are such an ass." I stated, finishing off my cigarette. I tossed it to the ground and pressed down on it, then picked it up and tossed it in one of the trash cans they kept every few parking lots or so.

" It's fucking cold out here." I stated, shrinking into his side.

James draped his arm around me, " Poor thing."

" I know, right?" I teased half-heartedly, leaning into him.

" Yeah, want to make out?"

He jokingly leaned towards me and I took his cigarette from his mouth. Before I could take a proper drag he stole it back and put it between his lips. I pouted at him and he laughed.

" Maybe if you are lucky later in life, that will work on some poor sucker."

" You bet. Fuck, I am so damn tired. Can we just fucking skip today; get our tongues pierced or something?"

" Go ask Edward over there, he has one. Bet he'll take you and hold your scared little hand."

" No way."

He shoved me and I almost fucking ran into Edward, who held his arms out to make sure I wouldn't fall into him. I steadied myself and he let out a nervous laugh.

" Watch out trippy." James called out.

" I'm sorry." I told Edward quietly.

" You guys are like an old married couple." Edward noted.

" More like he's a jackass and I have to deal with him."

He laughed, " Maybe he has a crush on you."

" James? No way. If he does, it's totally not mutual; he's cute but not my type. And he's like my older brother I never had."

" Do you have family?" he asked.

" Well, kind of. My dad re-married a little while ago, and she had three kids. But I'm not really...in the picture I guess one could say." I said, stealing James cigarette as he got closer.

" Not in the picture?"

" It's complicated." I replied quietly.

He had grabbed my ass, purposely distracting me for the cigarette. I smacked him away from me.

" James, just fucking take this and let the girl keep it." Edward stated, grabbing one of his and handing it to James.

" What about you? Family wise?"

" My parents divorced when I was like thirteen, mom remarried two years ago. My step-dad already had two kids, he was widowed, two kids. Alice is younger than me by two years, and Emmett is younger than me. It's kind of weird; I'll be nineteen this June."

" How does that?..."

" Well, usually It'd be a late Birthday if it was of the usual case. Like I should be seventeen turning eighteen because some kids have a late Birthday. But in my sophomore year I was going through some uh...medical shit...and I really wasn't doing too great. I basically decided to drop out, but my mom was just wanting me to get back into school once I was stable again, so I picked it back up, and now it's just all fucked up."

I nodded. " I'd imagine so."

Suddenly I saw Angela running towards me and she yelled out my name, catching my attention quickly. I sighed and looked over, wondering what in the hell she had to say right now. I wasn't going to settle whatever issue was going on here in front of them.

" BELLA! It's Leah." she said hurriedly.

" What's wrong?" I asked, handing James my cigarette.

" All I saw was her being escorted into the nurse's office with a bloody lip, and Rosalie Hale being escorted into the principal's office."

When I got into the school I headed for the office, ignoring the receptionist who was asking me mindless questions. I reached the nurse's office and I stopped in the doorway. Emmett Cullen was standing in there, standing next to Leah, who was sitting on the cot, and apologizing profusely to her.

I walked in there and her eyes shot to mine.

" What happened?"

" It's nothing, Bella..."

" Fine...Look, I'll have to get a note for you and call Charlie. You probably need stitches.

Leah looked down at her lap and sighed, hopping down. She walked in front of me, and I saw Edward walk in the office, giving Emmett a 'what the fuck is going on' look. Emmett sighed, mumbling 'Rosalie', under his breath. Edward rolled his eyes and his gaze went to Leah, and then locked on me.

His gaze was piercing, and I found myself frozen in my spot, staring right back at him.

" Bella! Sorry to ruin your moment but..ow!" Leah ground out.

" Sorry, I ju-"

I was cut off when I slammed into a body, a familiar one that belonged to James. I was already slightly ticked off, I didn't want to snap at James."

" Whoa, Swan. Just wanted to know what was going on." I heard James.

This office was getting way to crowded

~\\~

After getting us excused, being able to excuse ourselves because of the situation, I called my Charlie in the office and told him what happened, or at least what I knew from the situation. The conversation was short and awkward.

I took Leah to the hospital in Forks and we sat in the waiting room for a short while before being taken into an open exam room. She sat on the cot, holding a cloth that the nurse gave her to her bottom lip, swinging her legs back and forth.

" What happened?" I asked her.

" I swear to god, Bella, we were just talking. Emmett's locker is like three away from mine, and he was joking with me about how I have to basically pull the locker door off to get it open. And all of a sudden Rosalie Hale just came clicking down in her stupid heels and started yelling at Emmett, and I tried to tell her that we were just talking and then she just shoved me into the locker and punched me. Emmett grabbed her before she did anything else."

I sighed, " Okay, fine. Just watch out, Leah, or else it will be worse next time."

" What did she do to you, Bella?" she asked.

" Nothing that needs to be re-lived."

" Leah Clearwater, is it?" I heard a smooth voice say, I looked up and was met with a pair of shocking blue eyes.

" I'm Dr. Cullen, and what have we got over here?" he asked, looking over her chart.

Dr. Cullen looked pretty good being an older guy. His light blonde hair was slicked back completely, not a hair out of place or hanging loose. His face structure was perfect, sharp angles and perfectly symmetrical. His face was basically perfect, right down to his bright blue eyes that were piercing.

His body was lean, obviously someone who was a health freak, but he's a doctor so that's expected. He was dressed in a pair of perfectly pressed black slacks, an ironed button up with blue striped tie, and a lab coat hanging off his body, but fitting. His gold plaque nametag said ' Dr. C. Cullen' engraved into it, and his black shoes were so shiny I swear I could see my face in them.

I think Leah was drooling when she took one look at him. I smacked her leg and she glared harshly at me before looking at him. He asked her to take the rag off and he took a good look at her bottom lip.

" Definitely going to need a few stitches, most likely three. How did you get this?"

Leah's eyes down casted. " Fight at school."

" Ah, I see. Well, give me a second here."

He shuffled through some drawers for a few things, and just then my father came bursting through the doors, police uniform at all. When he spotted us he came over and stood next to Leah, not glancing at me for a second.

" What in the heck happened?"

" A girl at school hit me." Leah said monotone

" What? Why did she hit you?"

" Can Bella tell you?"

Dr. Cullen came forth, greeting Charlie before getting started on Leah's stitches for her busted lip. My dad turned towards me with an uninterested look on his face, and I looked back at him.

" Well, the situation had to do with your son, Emmett." I stated, looking at Dr. Cullen who immediately looked towards me, but didn't interrupt. " His girlfriend Rosalie Hale is very hostile towards other girls and, uh, Leah's locker is close to Emmett's, and they had just been joking and laughing about Leah's weird locker door and Rosalie took that as them flirting and hit Leah."

" What in the hell is wrong with that girl? I'm going to talk with the school about this."

Dr. Cullen said nothing, but he probably wanted to. This was his son's girlfriend, he must have known her, but I didn't know a damn about that situation, or how they must have knew each other before the move. Honestly, I didn't give a fuck. I gave a fuck that Rosalie messed with Leah. Yeah, Leah and I aren't exactly 'sisters' but I care about her if something were to happen.

When they first moved in Leah definitely made it hard not to like her. I might not be on great terms with my father, Jake doesn't seem to like anybody, Seth is lost in his own world and Sue loves Charlie and is polite and brief to me, but with Leah, we are okay to some extent.

Once I'd been done talking with my dad, he told me to get back to school, and at this point, I'd be walking in during Biology class. It was twice in two days we talked.

That was a record.

With Leah taken care of with my father, I headed off back to Forks High School. When I got there, I quickly skittered through the halls with my Biology book. I went to the office first to pick up a late slip and that I was excused for it.

When I walked into the class the teacher was right in the middle of the lesson. I walked over to his desk just as he silenced and handed him the note, after giving it a good once over, he nodded at me and I took my seat next to Edward.

The class was resumed as so, and I was not paying much attention today, I really just wanted to take a few hits of my blunt and be at James' house right now. The class continued on, and Mr. Malina was going on about Mitosis in detail, next class we were going to be using microscopes, so I guess that was going to be cool.

Once I was dismissed I headed off to gym, and noticed Edward Masen following me closely. When I entered the gym doors I went straight for the girls locker room. I changed my clothing and put on some deodorant. Once I finished I headed into the gym, and teams for volleyball were being set up again.

Unfortunately, I had this class with Rosalie Hale.

I wondered how she was still in school right now.

Great, now I can make an idiot out of myself in front of Edward, again.

When Rosalie Hale spotted me, she gave me one of her stupid smirks, as if to say she won.

I glared at her, and Coach Clapp stood us all up.

I was on a team with Edward Masen and Rosalie Hale, same side of the damn net. Some girl named Samantha was there, and she was in front, closer to the net, with me. The other team started it off good. I was fucking shocked how great Edward was with sports, he hit the ball hard enough to come towards me, but not far enough to pass right over. I jumped up and spiked it down, earning us a point.

The ball went back and forth for awhile, and at one point, Rosalie had hit me square in the back, 'on accident', but I kept my cool. And then she did it again, and Coach Clapp clearly was not pleased with her at the moment.

But no, it was the third time, when she smacked me straight on the back of the head that I had completely had enough of it, and I turned around and went up to her. Yeah, she was fucking taller than me, but she was a fucking marshmallow.

" What are you going to do, Swan? I already got a good hit on your sister, you next?"

" You're a fucking bitch." I spat at her.

" At least I'm not the most butch girl in school."

Before she could blink I knocked her down and clocked her right in the nose. Her scream bounced off the walls and I heard Coach Clapp use his whistle. A few awful names for her spewed out of my mouth and suddenly I felt two hands firmly grip my arms and pull me back after receiving a clear smack across my face. I struggled in the arms, and felt myself being pulled against a strong chest.

" Fucking bitch!" I screamed, thrashing violently.

" Miss. Swan! Calm yourself." Coach Clapp shouted just as Rosalie got to her feet, her hand covered her nose, and she was yelling out profanities in my direction.

" Let me the fuck go!" I yelled, struggling against the unknown arms.

" Cut it out!"

Fuck.

It was Edward.

I did my best and successfully shoved him off of me, and I stormed off towards the locker room, ignoring the Coach's yells for me to get to the principal's office. Once I changed back into my clothes, taking about five minutes, I walked out of the gym and literally ran into Edward.

Why was he everywhere I go?"

" Are you alright?" he asked.

" I'm fine. Now if you'll excuse me I have to escort myself to the principal's office."

I brushed passed him and down to the school's main office for the third time today. I knew this time that I probably wasn't going to be getting off without a hitch; detention was definitely in store for me. And I am most definitely not looking forward to it.

At all.

**Authors Note- A few things to say here! So READ ON!**

**I have a Polyvore, and I have outfits for this story already posted, I will probably have 1-2 outfits posted per chapter, but on Polyvore it clearly states what chapter the outfit is for (Starting with ch. 1 of cours). Link is in my profile to my polyvore, so go check it out! I will have ' The Story Of Us' Links at the end of my FF profile, so hop to it!**

**Also, thanks for all the positive response! I love you guys so much and I appreciate you taking the time to read.**

**Review!**


	4. A Place In This World

**Authors Note- Hello everybody. Hope your week was good!**

**Disclaimer- S. Meyer owns all things Twilight.**

**Chapter Song- Chapter Song: A Place In This World by: Taylor Swift**

~\\~

BPOV

~\\~

" Alright. This is what I want you kids to do. I'm going to leave the room, and you aren't going to be loud enough for me to hear you from outside the room. I have other stuff to do then watch you all sneak texts under your desks and other teenager stuff. I'll be back in two and a half hours."

Yeah, teachers at Forks High are really dedicated to making sure we are properly disciplined.

Honestly, I didn't want to spend my Friday after school - which I could be spending time at Angela's before the party at Ben's - in detention, but I was still paying the price for hitting Rosalie, and so was she two rows ahead. Filing her fucking nails, the sound annoyed me to absolutely no end.

Just as Mr. Warren was walking out of the room, the door suddenly opened and revealed Edward Masen. I wondered what the hell he did to get his ass in here today. Mr. Warren gave him a glare, but Edward just made his way back, walking towards me and took his seat in the chair next to mine, which was particularly close.

" You look nice today."

I looked down at myself. I had on a pair of three year old knee high leather boots, with a worn three inch heal, and even more worn leather, with a pair of skinny jeans tucked into them, a red t-shirt with a saying. Over it I had on a black pull over hoodie that dipped down in the front, which showed my red shirt. Instead of my usual satchel I just had a black leather tote.

My black eyeliner was extra thick today, and my hair pulled back in a messy bun with a few strands hanging in front of my face.

" Uh, thanks. You look nice yourself."

He had on a pair of skinny jeans, those flat black shoes, and as usual, a white v-neck t-shirt. Edward is super skinny, and his arms are long and super thin, and long piano fingers. He doesn't look creepy, but he is borderline Tim Burton Victor character, no joke.

But despite, I find myself wondering how it would feel to be wrapped up in those thin arms, and being held against his lean form. Feel his li-

" Are you okay? You're fucking staring at me like something is wrong."

I snapped out of it and looked back at my phone. " Sorry."

" Still in for Rosalie Hale?"

" Mhm, what about you?"

" Caught smoking on school grounds more than once."

I nodded, " Yeah, that's why I usually smoke in the car."

He shrugged and set his black messenger bag down on the ground, taking out his fancy Blackberry from his small pocket in those nice, tight jeans. He was driving me crazy, and this is only his first week here. And he also had no damn clue how much he was affecting me. One look in those eyes and I was basically a goner, or a look at him in general...

" It was fucking stupid. I don't like to smoke inside my car unless absolutely necessary."

I laughed under my breath, and he tossed a glance in my direction, raising one perfect eyebrow.

" One of those guys?"

" I don't want my fucking car to smell like the inside of a cigarette box. I actually value the people who bought that car for me enough to take care of it."

" I never said I didn't value my car."

" How can you value that thing? It's a hunk of metal."

Asshole.

" I'm done talking to you."

" Attitude... You seem to have a lot of it."

I sighed, " I don't appreciate you insulting my car. What you like and what I like are different, so what you think is ' a hunk of metal ', is something that I cherish because it has good years behind it. So, whatever. We all have opinions."

I continued with my game of Tetris on my phone until I was finished and failed once, then I just leaned against the chair with a deep sigh. I pocketed my phone and grabbed my tote, riffling around in it until I found my mini bag of honey mustard pretzel chunks. I opened it up and suddenly Edward became interested in what I was doing.

If he loved these as much as I did; then we were clearly meant to be. There would be no question about it. I looked over at him, and he passed me a glance.

" Plan on sharing?"

" Plan on apologizing."

He scoffed.

I put a pretzel in my mouth.

" Sorry."

I held the bag in his direction and he grabbed two. I smiled at ate more.

" How long have you been hanging out with James."

" A little over three years. I kinda just flowed into his crowd."

" I see...Why'd you decide that?"

" I was really pissed when my dad started seeing this new women after he divorced my mom, and him and I weren't ever talking...I kind of rebelled. That was the result of the lip ring. I don't know, when I got into pot and the smoking, I just wasn't stressed about shit. I forgot about everything that was going on, and just felt good for once. I didn't worry about the next awkward phone call with my mom, or seeing my dad so happy with his new girlfriend, but avoiding me. It was a mess."

" Why do you still do it now?"

" Because I still stress over shit, and I just never dropped it. I mean, if I stopped I would crave the pot, but I know it wouldn't be an issue. It's not a crutch, just something to loosen me up. You know?"

" Yeah... I can definitely relate on the stress, that's why I got into it. My life just got fucked up. I mean, my parents know I do it. They aren't stupid; and they don't like it, but I'm not snorting coke, or dropping acid."

I nodded, " Yeah...My dad just...We never talk."

" I'm sorry."

" It's life, you know."

" It definitely sucks sometimes... Alice and Emmett are just...fucking perfect." he said, " and Carlisle is Mr. Dreamy. I care about Alice and Emmett, but sometimes I just miss my old life. I miss it just being my parents and I; hanging with all my old friends."

" Yeah...Just you and your parents having a great time. I get a new step-mom and I get three younger ones, and I am suddenly just nothing to anybody."

" You aren't a nobody, Bella." Edward said quietly.

" I have my friends, including James. He might be a fucking tool sometimes, but I love him like a brother."

He laughed and took some more of my pretzels.

" You, uh, going to James' later on?"

" Actually, one of my friend's boyfriend is throwing a party tonight for Spring Break or whatever. I kind of have to make an appearance or she'll probably fucking kill me."

I was really disappointed, because from what it sounded like was that he was going to be at James' house tonight, and I wished that I could just ditch the party and hang out with Edward. Granted, James would be there, but Edward was such an easy person to talk to. It was a fucking surprise, because it's generally hard for me to find a person that I can genuinely stand without wanting to kill myself.

When I looked over at him; his expression was slightly crest-fallen, and I wondered if he was disappointed that I wasn't going to be at James'. I had no idea what else would have caused the look on his face right now.

" Maybe I could stop by later on and hang out with you guys if that's cool."

He nodded, " Yeah, that'd be cool. He asked me to head over tonight, I have to pick up a few things anyways..."

" Yeah, he's pretty close to my house, actually just four houses down from Ben's, sometimes I crash on his couch if I can't get through the entire party night at Ben's. Are you going to the party tonight?"

" Not exactly my scene."

I sighed quietly to myself and nodded slowly, occupying myself with the patterns of the table top. He said nothing afterwards, and we didn't talk after that. The clock ticked by and Mr. Warren came in twice, and everyone was generally quiet, besides the occasional passed word, or flip of a book.

I was a little disappointed that Edward wasn't planning on going to the party, but I could tell it wasn't really his scene, hell, it's not even my scene but with Angela as my best friend, it would be weird if I didn't go, and she would totally guilt trip me about it later, especially if she found out that I ditched her to get high. She didn't exactly think that getting high was good, and yeah, it wasn't like it was healthy, but I didn't expect her to understand.

When the clock hit five fifteen, Mr. Warren came in for the last time and propped the door open and let us all out of the room. People shuffled out quickly, some lazier then others because they just slept right through it.

I was glad that this was my last day of detention

I stood up, shoved my chair in towards the desk and swung my messenger bag over my shoulder. I zipped up my grey hoodie that hung around me and pulled the hood up, knowing that it was raining outside by the sound of it tapping relentlessly on the tall windows.

I headed out of the room and down the hall. I already had put my keys in my bag, so I just went straight for the exit. I jogged down the stairs carefully in my shoes and headed to my car. I wretched open the truck door and closed it, and started up the car. It didn't go the first time I twisted the key, but the second time it roared to life. I turned on the radio and heard some The Pretty Reckless playing, so I kept it on low and hit the road.

I lit up a cigarette just as I put the car in reverse, and suddenly there was a knock on the passenger window. I stopped and looked over, and standing in the pouring rain soaking wet was Edward. I leaned over and unlocked the door and he opened it quickly and hopped in, fucking soaking wet from rain.

" Emmett decided to be an ass and leave me carless. He must have stolen my fucking keys from my locker somehow. Give me a ride?"

" Lead me there."

~\\~

Holy damn.

Their house was absolutely fucking awesome. I couldn't put it into words.

Not only buried in the fucking woods, but open once you reach it. Huge house, large open windows on the outside, balconies, pillars by the front door, and steps going up to the main floor, and the ground leveled down by the garage. Basically one of those houses that on the outside there was a door to the basement, but with fifteen steps up to the front door there was the main floor. It was fucking gorgeous.

All the lights were lit up outside, and while it was big; it looked like a home.

" Wow."

He laughed, " Yeah. My mom is a little...eccentric."

" This is really cool."

" It's completely crazy on the inside, don't be fooled."

I smiled and my eyes down casted to my lap.

" Thanks for the ride."

" Sure thing."

" Is my face that fucking awful looking, or is something interesting in your lap?" he asked

I looked over at him.

" Any reason you want me to look at you?"

" I just like being looked in the eye when people talk to me."

With a deep sigh, I looked through the windshield.

" Is something wrong with you?"

" I've got to get going. Since I am going to the party I have to get dressed and head over early to help. So..."

" Alright, I get it...Bye."

Just before he closed the door, he looked at me. " I'll see you tonight at James' right?"

" Maybe."

~\\~

That maybe turned into a definite yes the moment I walked into Ben's party.

It was so unusually packed tonight, and the moment I was through the front door I was rammed into bodies. I almost tripped in my heels and went to go find Angela. I looked at my watch, and it was already eight thirty. I had homework I'd wanted to get done, and I had pawned off my hours because of detention and then the party. I didn't do this often at all.

But tomorrow I opened up at the diner, so I didn't want to stay out too late tonight. When I left the house Charlie had already been in an awful mood upon having to pick up Renee and Phil from the airport, and he looked briefly at me. The look of disapproval didn't seem to affect me anymore. He probably didn't like my clothing choice.

Leah had almost gotten on her knee's and begged me to let her come with, I stayed out of it and ignored her, but Sue did not want her here tonight, because by six thirty, apparently there were cars already lining up when Sue had gotten back from a quick stop at the grocery store, said she could barely weave through the parked cars, and I could hear the music from my house. I walked over to Ben's, only a ten minute walk from my house.

He lives in a two story house, it's pretty basic. Our neighborhood is basically middle class homes, a few ones that are bigger than others maybe on one street to another. His is pretty simple, grey brick, white siding and black shutters and white porch accents.

I had put on a spaghetti strap metallic lace dress that was tight and hit mid thigh. It had a band around the waist that showed off my figure. It was a little out there for a party, but usually I always do this.

My shoes were a dark red, and leather with a three, almost four inch heel. I had my hair up in a high ponytail, and my neck was full of necklaces, and I had a few random bracelets on my arms, and my beaded choker that had dropped beads that draped over my collarbone.

I never made myself look trashy, a little overboard, but not trashy. Some days I am found at a party wearing this, others in a basement with James with a pair of skinny jeans, converse, and a t-shirt and hoodie.

" Bella! Thank god, I have been looking for you!" Jess said, hanging onto my arm.

" Hey, everything alright?" I yelled over the music.

" Yeah! But Angela is like sucking face with Ben on his couch. You look hot by the way!"

Jess had on a skin tight pink ruched tube top that fit her figure perfect. She had on a very short jean skirt, and a pair of pink pumps. Her hair was down in curls, and pulled back with a twisted butterfly headband.

" Thanks, you look awesome, too!"

We both headed for the kitchen and I grabbed a bottle of sprite, drowned a fourth of it, and put vodka in it. Jess shook her head and laughed at me, but did the same thing with a coke bottle but with rum instead of vodka. Once we finished with our drinks, I went for the cupcakes. His mom makes killer red velvet cupcakes, and I quickly snatched one up.

The party was alive, and every time Jess and I checked on Angela, she and Ben were just making out with no shame. It's really not like Angela to act like that, and I wasn't jealous, but she was definitely attracting attention.

Jess and I danced with the others in the middle of the living room, and the music was a little too hip-hop for my taste, but I danced anyways and it worked. The sprite and vodka loosened me up a bit, but not enough to make me hazy. As I danced around Jess, I suddenly felt myself being pulled back against someone's chest, and his...excitement on my ass. I turned around and shoved the guy back harshly; he tripped into another guy who spilled his cup of beer.

" Don't fucking touch me." I snarled.

" Bitch!"

" Jackass!"

" Whoa, settle down there, Swan." Jess said, pulling at my wrist.

I grabbed my small wallet/clutch and strode over towards the guy. He had on a smug expression, and without warning I slapped him across the face. There was no way a sleaze was going to do that and get away with it, and Jessica knew that I wouldn't let it go, that wasn't my fucking style.

" Any girl who finds what you did alluring is fucking stupid and has no respect. It sounds like that's in your category anyways."

As I walked off, I saw Angela walking towards me, looking disheveled and confused.

" What the heck was that?"

" Some guy walked up and grinded up on Bella, and she did not appreciate it." Jess put in for me.

" He was a fucking creep."

" Are you alright?" Angela asked, and in that moment I knew that we were back to normal, and our friendship was alright; despite us not talking as much the past few days since that phone call.

" I'm fine. He just pissed me off."

" Sorry, I was a little occupied..."

" I am going to get another sprite." I stated, draining the rest of my other one.

I went back to the kitchen and made myself another vodka and sprite, and headed back out to see Angela and Jess. We all danced together for a bit before going over and sitting on the couch to talk for a bit, I was getting kind of antsy by ten, because I was itching to head over to James' and see Edward there.

I wondered what he was like high. Yeah, that wasn't even the beginning of my curiosity about that man. Angela seemed to notice my fidgety movements and cast a look over at me, as if to ask me what the hell was wrong. Well, not only was I itching to see Edward, but I just wanted to get high. I always a little tense in these scene's in the first place.

" Let me guess. James' again tonight?"

" I know you don't like it, Ange." I stated with a sigh.

" I just don't want anything to happen to you, okay?"

" James is really cool, guys, honestly. He isn't some pothead, and he's a great friend to me."

" You seem extra eager to go over there." Jess noted suggestively.

" We aren't like that, okay? I swear, it's like he is my older brother."

" Then why are you so antsy?" Ange exclaimed with a laugh.

It slipped out before I could even stop myself or even think about it for that matter.

" Edward Masen is going to be there tonight. James used to live in Chicago near Edward and they were friends as kids, and then James moved away, and now Edward ironically ended up in Forks where James is, so they are friends."

" Wait, Edward Masen does pot? Bella, come on!"

" We were talking in detention today. He's like so chill and cool, and on top of being so fucking...Come on, guys. Cut me a break."

" Come on, Bella! You and I solo until college!" Jess hissed quietly.

I rolled my eyes at her and leaned back in my seat, taking another sip of my drink. Angela patted my leg and winked at me.

" Go, and don't get yourself stupid drunk or high, okay?"

I almost squealed.

I shot out of the place before they could tell me not to go and change their minds. I went out from the backdoor and worked my way around the house to the front. I weaved through bodies, because it was packed out on the lawn also, and beer cans were littered everywhere imaginable. I lit up a cigarette once I got to the sidewalk and went down a few houses to James'.

When I got to his house, I had to go through his fucking basement window. I knocked on it twice and then opened it up. I saw him appear and he grabbed my arms and helped me down safely.

" Hey there, hottie tottie."

I rolled my eyes, " Hey, what's up?" I asked, putting my clutch down on the arm of his couch.

" Nothing really. I'm just waiting for Masen to get here already. He said was running late because he was organizing his music collection in his new room."

I nodded and sat down on the couch, taking a deep breath.

" Starting early?"

" Yeah, light me up."

" If you weren't like a little sister, I would be in your pants right now. Trying to lure Edward to you?"

" Think it might work?"

" Yeah. Just don't have sex on my bed while I am sleeping."

He handed me a blunt and lit it up and then sat next to me with his own. Usually we passed one, put apparently not tonight. I took two long drags and let out a breath, feeling my body start to unwind.

" Your not planning on just fucking with him are you? I mean, he's a good friend to me."

" James, do you think I would do that?"

He shrugged.

" I've never had a relationship before. He's just...something about him is just... I like him."

" I'm not accusing you, Bella. Just saying."

I sighed.

" Don't get like that. I just wanted to make sure you didn't want him for all the other reasons girls do."

" He is not lacking in the looks department, but that's just a bonus. I mean, he's easy to talk to and something about him just...I don't know. I'm a freak, I know. I just met the guy."

James laughed and I took another drag. When I let out the smoke, James blew his in my direction. I shoved his shoulder and he stood up, walking over to the small mini fridge that he had next to his entertainment system.

" Drink?"

" Just water. I had sprite and vodka at Ben's, and if I get home smashed tonight it wouldn't be good. At least, not for tonight."

" Oh, yeah, your mom and step-dad are here this weekend for the holiday, right?"

" Yeah, and my dad just fucking hates the guy, so it's always crazy tense with that. But my mom and Sue get along. I don't know, it just sucks because my mom always tries to corner my dad about me, and he just fucking blows her off. And my dad gets annoyed at my mom and Sue being nice and civil to each other. He's still fucking bitter."

" Isn't that fucking weird? My aunt and uncle got a divorce, but when he got re-married, they were both over for holiday dinners and got along just fine. No snarky shit going on. He was so fucking annoyed by it."

I laughed, " Yeah, my dad fucking hates it."

" Enjoy this night Bella, enjoy it." he said, handing me my water.

I groaned and took another drag, just as I did, I heard footsteps heading down the stairs, and James glanced over at me and winked. I slapped his shoulder and took another drag, being greedy this time. My eyes flickered over and I saw Edward standing there.

Fuck, he's so hot.

And apparently I already lost my mind filter.

" Hey," he said, kind of just standing there.

" You should take off your dress, Bella. Get the party started."

" Fucker." I mumbled under my breath.

Edward took of his leather jacket and tossed it on James' desk chair, and sat down on the recliner near my side of the couch. He sighed and leaned back, eyes shifting around the room until they landed on James.

" Hey, Bella, why don't you treat Edward while I roll another."

With an annoyed groan I looked over at James and scowled.

" I don't want to share."

" Swan."

" Grahm."

I took in a long drag and looked over at Edward. I asked him to lean forward and I was feeling courageous. He hesitantly leaned forward, and I moved so that my mouth was only an inch from his, I breathed out the smoke and Edward opened his mouth as I transferred the smoke into his system.

" Whoa, someone is courageous."

Edward leaned back with a satisfied look on his face, but was hiding a smile. I leaned back into the couch and looked over at James.

" You told me to share."

" You never share like that with me."

" That's because your my older brother, jackass." I said, watching as he carefully rolled a blunt.

Once it was finely sealed he lit it and passed it on to Edward.

" Bella, you are in for an experience."

" Why?"

" Because Edward here...He's a riot."

~\\~

" I mean, like, fuck! How does a bunny relate to Jesus? Be honest about this shit, I mean, fuck! A bunny, peter cotton tail for fucks sake. I mean, what do you guys think?"

I looked over at James. " He's fucking hilarious."

Edward let out a hysterical laugh, which made me laugh with him. Mostly because it was funny, but everything was fucking funny right now.

" I don't fucking get it either. I mean, maybe because it's spring and spring means bunnies? And more bunnies because fuck, rabbits go at it like fucking rabbits."

We broke into James' vodka stash if it wasn't already obvious.

" Right? I mean, how much do they do it?"

" Probably like fifty times a day."

" Fuck, I wish I got that lucky, that would be fucking awesome. I wonder if my body has that much se-"

" Okay, whoa guys."

" How many times have you done in it in a day?" Edward asked in general.

" Like...Three, same girl though."

" Don't fucking ask me, I'm fucking pure, man."

Edward stared at me like I had seven heads.

" You are fucking with us."

" No way!"

" That's why she won't have sex with me, man. I am not special enough."

" How is that fucking possible? That's like a fat kid sitting in front of a triple chocolate fucking truffle cake and not eating just one bite."

" Are you saying I look like a whore?" I asked with a laugh.

" Fuck no, you are just hot. That dress looks fantastic on you."

" Oh, this old thing." I joked.

He let out some kind of groaning noise, and I saw James stand up and walk over to his bed. When he looked over at us he looked exasperated and annoyed.

" I'm claiming my bed before you both do." he said before collapsing down onto the mattress.

I laughed loudly and stretched on the couch. Before I knew it, Edward was standing over me.

" Scoot over. That recliner is fucking uncomfortable."

I continued laughing and he lifted up my legs and set them over his lap, his hand running over my calf. His hand felt good, and for some reason I just closed my eyes and enjoyed it.

" I'm so tired." I said in a whisper.

I felt Edward moving me towards the edge of the couch, and he laid behind me. I looked over my shoulder, and he wrapped his arms around me as if giving me a hug. He rested his head on the plush arm rest and closed his eyes.

" What are you doing?" I asked, my words coming out in a slur.

" You look like you need a fucking hug."

I didn't say anything; I looked forward at the wall, something inside feeling wrong and empty. I let him hold me, because a part of it felt right, and he was already almost asleep beside me. I wondered how many girls he'd done this with.

" I won't do anything." I heard him say, sounding half asleep.

His arm moved across my waist, reaching over until his hand was next to mine that as near my face. I sighed and closed my eyes, trying to relax, but I'd never done this, and when I get high sometimes I get paranoid. I felt him kiss the back of my neck softly.

His forehead press against the back of my neck and his hand moved to wrap around my wrist, and I felt circular movements with his thumb in the middle of the inside of my hand. Something about that soothing movement made me relax and I was soon asleep.

**Authors Note- I updated a little earlier. As I said, every time Friday rolls around I get busy!**

**In my profile, there is a picture/link of the CULLEN'S HOUSE, and a link for Bella's outfits and Jessica's outfit for the party! All outfits for this chapter are posted on my POLYVORE, link in my PROFILE!**

**So, we've got a little bit more Edward and Bella stuff going on for this chapter, trust me, more Edward and Bella to come in the future! Send me a review, I want to know your thoughts! Have a question? Ask and I'll get back to you, I promise!**

**Review!**


	5. Falling For You

**Authors Note- Alright, here is the next chapter! Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer- S. Meyer owns all things Twilight.**

**Chapter Song- Falling For You by: Colbie Caillat**

~\\~

BPOV

~\\~

When I woke up, it was to the sound of a vacuum on the floor above me. My mouth tasted like vodka, and my muscles felt like jelly for an odd reason. I felt something behind me shifting, and I looked over and saw Edward.

All of a sudden there was the slam of the basement door, and barreling steps. I looked up and James appeared, he looked at me and gave me a smirk from across the room.

" Sleep well, Bella? I thought you were one to take it slower."

I rolled my eyes and lifted myself up. Edward's body flopped over on the couch and his arm locked around my waist, holding me tightly to him. I almost fell back on top of him, but I caught myself. I looked over at James and he sighed and walked over. He pealed Edward off me, which was pretty fucking hilarious, and helped me stand. I was still in my dress, which had fallen a bit, exposing my strapless bra and my stomach.

" That's a good look for you, Bella."

" Shut up." I said, lifting up my dress and looking around for my shoes.

" I think he noticed that his couch buddy left." James whispered.

I looked over and saw that Edward was shifting around, and his leg bent upwards and a small groan emitted from his mouth. I grabbed my clutch and opened it up, finding one of my little mini wisps to brush my teeth a little. I freshened up a bit and then put the gum in my mouth. I cleaned up some of my smeared makeup so I didn't look like a creature that just crawled out of a cage, and fixed my hair up neatly on top of my head.

" What the fuck happened last night?" I heard Edward say distantly as I plucked a bobby pin from my head and used it to put my bangs up.

" We got high, then we got drunk, I fell asleep, and I woke up finding you spooning my friend."

" Ah, fuck, I did do that didn't I?"

" Sure did."

" Probably scared her away. Fuck, I'm sorry that I did that, man."

" She's in the bathroom, and I don't think she minded all that much. You got her dress down to her stomach." I heard James say, and a slap following afterwards.

" I'm not like that, you know it."

With one last look in the mirror, I stepped out of the bathroom. James looked up and gave me a grin, and Edward looked away with a sigh. I walked over to the couch and grabbed my phone to check for anything, I had one message from my mom.

" In trouble from dad, Swan?"

" Haha, your hilarious. You and I both know he doesn't give a fuck."

I sat down on the arm of the couch, and Edward was next to me, fidgeting around and looking nervously at me every few seconds. I put the phone to my ear and looked over at him.

" You like to spoon, huh?" I teased.

James laughed and Edward sighed quietly.

I listened to my mother's voicemail.

" Isabella Marie! You are supposed to be here because I am in Forks, not partying out with your friends! Well, have fun, and be back in the morning, and be safe, I hope you brought condoms with you... I love you!"

I rolled my eyes, and James looked over at me.

" Just my mom making sure I have condoms." I said nonchalantly as I slipped my heels on, using the couch to help me so I wouldn't fall over.

" You know, you never answered my question." I said to Edward.

He glanced over at me, his green eyes almost looking ashamed.

" Sorry about last night. When I am all fucked up like that I get a little..."

" Cuddly? I mean, you told me that I looked like I needed a hug."

James belted out another laugh, and I glared at him.

" Is that what they call it now a days?"

" Anyways." I said, interrupting James, " Thanks for the _hug_."

" No problem." he breathed.

" What Bella means is that she really wishes you guys would have done the deed instead. She's waiting on someone to steal her v-card."

I slapped his shoulder and found myself blushing and embarrassed.

" Can you shut up about my private life?"

" Hey, you openly admitted to it last night, and right after Edward referred to you as delicious chocolate cake that should be eaten, and then called you hot."

" You know what, we were fucked up last night. And I have to get home and walk in these damn heels, so, bye."

I stuffed my phone in my clutch and I heard Edward stand.

" Do you want a ride? I have to get home, also, so I can drop you off."

" Uh, yeah, that'd be nice. Thanks."

Nice? More like awkward, but I didn't want to hurt his feelings because I do actually like the guy. He stood up, tall, skinny and just...beautiful. Edward grabbed his keys and shrugged his jacket on, handed James a wad of hundred dollar bills, and James handed him a kind of container that looked like an altoids container. Edward thanked him and slid it into the pocket of his skinny jeans, and walked over to me.

James let us out and I gave him a hug and promised to stop by with some money later.

" I love you, Swan. You know that?" he said as he wrapped his arms around me.

" I love you, too. Later." I said, smacking his ass jokingly. " And pull your damn pants up!"

Edward's shiny Volvo was parked on the street, and he opened my door for me and then got in on the driver's side. When he started the car up, it was quiet and it sounded like the purring of a cat. Just as he sat down, his ringtone went off, and I heard Breaking Benjamin playing. He gave me an apologetic look and answered the phone.

" Hello...I know I didn't come home this morning, mom...Out with some friends...Yeah, friends...Of course I did...I know, I love you, too...Okay, bye."

It sounded like he had a concerned mother.

" Sorry about that."

" Concerned parent?" I said.

" You, too?"

" Not really...My dad is the police chief of Forks, but we don't talk anymore really."

He looked at me incredulously as he put the car into drive. " You are fucking with me. The Chief of Police has a daughter that gets drunk and high, and goes out looking like how you look? Yet, you both never talk and he doesn't care about you?"

He drove down the street that James was on, and made a left as I told him, and slowly started cruising down my street closer to my house.

I scowled, " What are you saying?"

" To be perfectly blunt, you look fucking amazing in that dress, and I bet guys were all over you last night. And don't you find it kind of ironic that you are the daughter of a police man, and you smoke blunts and drink vodka."

I shrugged. " Yeah, I guess. But as I said we don't really talk or anything."

" Why don't you guys talk?" he asked as I pointed out my house for him.

" Maybe another time. I'm not really...open about what goes on in my life besides with James and my friends."

" Oh, sorry for pushing. Do you, uh, maybe want to go get breakfast together later after you shower or whatever, we could just talk?" he said forwardly.

I really, really wanted to say yes.

" I can't I have to open up at work this morning."

" Well, where do you work?"

" Forks Diner. And why are you so curious?"

" Maybe I'll stop by. I am kind of hungry."

This guy was a flirt, and I didn't expect it when I first met him. He seemed shyer and brooding the first few times I talked to him and it was kind of different. I looked over at him and smiled slightly. I felt hopeful for once.

" Yeah...That'd be cool."

Edward smiled and I opened the car door. " Thanks for the ride."

" Anytime."

I shut the door and walked towards the porch, taking my shoes off in the process because they were no longer comfortable anymore. I hopped up on the first step and then the next, and then stole the key from under the eave. I unlocked the door with a twitch of my wrist and put the key back. When I was finished, I walked inside the house and closed the door behind me.

Just as I turned around I almost ran right into my father. He looked down at me disapprovingly and I didn't say anything as I moved passed him to go upstairs. This was a rare occurrence.

I headed upstairs and went into my bedroom. I locked the door behind me and stripped off my dress. I tossed my dress over my desk chair and sunk into my bed. I sighed at the feeling of my mattress and comfortable sheets and covers around me. I nestled into my pillow and reached for my phone, setting the alarm for five fifteen.

I fell asleep relatively quick, and had to get up too soon for my liking.

When I stood, I felt really grimy and gross. I went into my bathroom and closed the door, and finished taking off my clothes. I stepped under the warm spray and washed up. I washed my body twice, and scrubbed my hair extra hard with the shampoo. I wrapped a towel around me when I was finished and felt much more awake.

I cleaned my face, brushed my teeth extra good and did my makeup real quick, a little bit of black eyeliner, silver shadow and an overall fair colored blush, and a special powder for under my eyes to hide to purple bruises.

I went into my bedroom and put on an underwear set, and slipped into a pair of medium wash studded skinny jeans. Then I put on a black tank top, and then a looser one on top of it that's grey, short sleeved, with 'danger' written across the chest in black letters. The fabric tied off to the left, which is why I had on the tank top so my stomach wasn't exposed. I grabbed my Prada black leather braided, platform sandals to finish the outfit.

Only minutes later I had my hair in big waves that reached my shoulder, I sprayed it, put on a little body spray. I finished off with my studded black bracelet and pirate charm bracelet.

After putting everything I needed in my bag I headed downstairs.

When I got downstairs it was quiet. I drank a little bit of orange juice and figured that I could have some breakfast at the diner. When I open our Chef, Garrett, usually makes us breakfast because early morning we aren't too busy.

When I got outside, it was pouring really badly, and I darted out quickly and got in my car and started it up. I put my phone in my bag and fiddled with my radio for a moment before heading off. The diner is about seven minutes away from my house, not far at all.

When I arrived it was five fifty, and I parked in the back and headed to the door quick, unlocking it and heading inside. The familiar smell of coffee made me smile, and I turned on all the lights in the break room, kitchen, and in the front. Five minutes there Garrett and another co-worker Jeremy, who cleans up tables and does any other cleaning work around here, showed up. He filled the salt and pepper shakers, re-filled the little black crates on the tables with sugar packets, creamers and napkins.

Garrett started up cooking and I cleaned off the counter and made sure that everything was good to go for the day. I put my black apron on, along with my nametag that was pinned to it and stuffed my things in the locker.

We are all like a little family, and we get along well around here. Another waiter and behind the counter is Jasper Whitlock. We go to school together, and are same grade, but he is basically in the same social class as Rosalie, they are actually cousins so they grew up together. He isn't a big a jerk as Rosalie, but he is a little bit snooty. We only really talk at work if we need help or something.

I always wondered why he had this job when he seemed like he was in a family that was well off, but it's never really my business.

Then there are two other workers that I don't encounter at all really; mostly because they work during the times that I am not working, and those two are Bree and Emily.

And last, but not least, we have the owner Charlotte Biers. She's actually only in her early thirties, and the diner has been passed down for a long time. Actually, she is one of the cooks, an amazing one at that, so she is around every day. Charlotte is really cool, and super nice and patient with her group of teenager employee's. She does anything really, and even covers shifts for us if we need it.

Today it was just Garrett, Charlotte, Jeremy and I, which was cool. At around six as the doors unlocked and the open sign blinked, Garrett handed me a place of hash browns and bacon like he knew I loved. I was able to eat it all in one sitting before our first customer came, and it was Waylon, he sat at the barstools by the counter and had a cup of coffee. He was here every morning without fail.

" Shouldn't you be sleepin' on a Saturday morning?"

" You always remind me. I wish, man. But life gets in the way. Someone has to pay for college." I noted, tapping my fingers.

He laughed and nodded.

The mornings dragged on slow around here, and at around eleven people were coming in a bit more. I had two tables of Saturday regulars, but it was still pretty slow as usual. I kept coffee going around, making sure to keep an eye on customers.

" Garrett, can I get a breakfast platter, with no hash browns and extra eggs, then an order of walnut pancakes."

Just as I finished taking the order, I heard the bell on the door go off, and I looked over and saw Edward standing there, with what I believed was his step sister Alice. I fought a smile when he looked over at me, and he walked through the diner and sat down on the stool right in front of where I stood behind the counter. Alice sat in the stool next to him and smiled at me.

" Hey."

" Hey." I replied.

" Hey!" I heard a chipper voice exclaim.

I smiled, " What can I get you? Anything?"

" Coffee, and some hash browns." Edward said.

" Oh, can I get an order of the blueberry banana pancakes, a side of bacon and corn beef hash, and a big glass of orange juice, no pulp, please!"

I put in the order to Garrett and made a few rounds, making sure everybody was satisfied. I rung up a bill and slid a debit in to pay and then returned. A few minutes later Jeremy dropped off an eight dollar tip for me, I smiled and put it in my pocket, and checked on Edward and Alice's order.

I re-filled Alice's orange juice, and Edward's coffee.

" Where's the ladies room?" Alice asked.

I pointed in the direction and she hopped off the stool and headed off.

" Nice work place."

I smiled. " Pays for shit."

" You look nice."

I looked down at my attire and smirked, " Thanks. So do you."

He laughed quietly and took a sip of his coffee. I smiled at him.

" Is it okay that I brought Alice? I am actually dropping her off at your house, apparently her and your younger step sister are now 'bestest friends'."

" Not really, it's not like it's a date. And, uh, interesting… Leah didn't really say anything, but that kid is weird anyways."

Edward nodded his head and smiled around the rim of his cup as he took another drink. I heard the small bell behind me, and I turned around and saw their order on the counter. I handed Edward his hash browns, and put Alice's plate near her chair.

He took a bite of it and then looked at me when he swallowed.

" These are the best fucking hash browns I have ever tasted in my entire goddamn life." he noted.

" Good, I am glad you enjoy them."

Alice pranced back into her chair and smiled at her meal. The entire way through eating Alice was raving on how good the pancakes were, and how 'crisp' the bacon was, which made me smile and hide a laugh. I could hear her talking about it as I waited on tables, and when I came back she would compliment. I never knew that our food was that good to people who just moved here.

" We used to live in Chicago, and I have never found a single place in the city that had pancakes, bacon and hash browns as good as these. It feels more homemade. This is awesome. We should come here every Saturday, Edward!"

I smiled at Alice's enthusiasm, and she looked over at me. " Do you work every Saturday morning?"

" I sure do." I replied, putting on another pot of coffee.

" Yeah, for sure every Saturday. Hey, maybe we could take my dad, or Esme. We could take Emmett but he has awful table manners." Alice said, trailing off.

" He's a fucking monster, Alice." Edward corrected.

" Why is that?" I asked.

" He will order everything, eat sloppy, burp, wipe his hands on his pants. It's gross, honestly."

" Yeah, and my dad...Well, you probably know that Edward has a different dad, right? We're basically a merged family, kind of like yours! Anyways, my dad is like totally proper, not uptight, he's an awesome dad, but he has good table manners, as do I and the rest of us, and Emmett is just terrible. We tell him that he was adopted."

I laughed, " Well, you know when Amish people burp after a meal it's actually a compliment as in a way of saying it was a great meal."

" Emmett would be all over that." Alice laughed.

Edward nodded in agreement, " He probably would. Or use it as an excuse."

" Like he needs those."

I smiled, and mumbled an excuse me as I greeted another costumer and seated them. Much to my dismay, I saw Rosalie, Tanya and Kate. Kate is Tanya's sister, and she is actually a sophomore and pretty much a bitch like Tanya. She isn't nearly as bad considering she makes it easy to shut her down.

They gave their demanding drink orders and I got them quickly so that they wouldn't complain. They still did, and I also noticed Tanya eyeing Edward, licking her lips.

" I'd actually like _that _on a platter." Tanya said, pointing to Edward while his back was turned.

I looked at her, " So that'd be nothing for you?"

She glared at me. " Fine. I want a spinach egg white omelet and some greek toast on the side."

Her two little minions rattled off their orders and I put them in to Garrett and saw Edward smirking.

" Should I get the platter, or do you already have one for me to get on?"

I rolled my eyes. " How about I take you out back and beat you instead."

" He'd probably like that." Alice said, laughing.

" Oh, look, it's the freak!"

It was Kate Denali, and I was pretty sure that she was talking about Alice. I looked over at Alice and saw her looking down at her place with a sigh. Edward looked pissed, and I walked around the counter and looked at her.

" This is a public diner, so I will kindly ask you not to speak like that. Thanks."

She laughed, " Really? That the best you got?"

" Look, this is a work place, and I have respect and I am mature. So either keep your thoughts to yourself, or head for the door."

" Hey, Cullen, I heard some rumors around school that your brother Edward over there isn't actually related to you, and that you guys hook up. Must be easy, since you live together I mean."

I heard to barstool slam down, and I knew it was Edward. He was almost charging for that girl.

" Kate! Oh, Edward, she so does not mean that." Tanya said.

She probably only said that to be on good terms with Edward, or try to look like the non-bitch that she really isn't.

I didn't want to, but I grabbed a hold of Edward's wrist, and with all my strength pulled him back. It worked, and he stilled.

" You've officially been kicked out. I don't want to see you here now. Leave."

" Bu-"

" Bella, what's going on out here?" I heard Charlotte say.

" They have been disrupting the diner and insulting our customers. I've asked them to leave."

" You three, again?" Charlotte asked them.

They said nothing, and Rosalie glared hard at me.

" Get out of here, now. You aren't allowed back in here."

" See you at school, Swan." Rosalie sneered as she walked past me.

Once they were gone, Charlotte gave me a smile, apologized to Edward and Alice and headed back into the kitchen.

" Spinach egg white omelet, greek toast, pecan pancakes with a side of bacon and a fruit salad up for grabs!"

Edward picked up the chair, sat down and looked through the kitchens open window.

" I'll take the pecan pancakes."

~\\~

Edward and Alice left at around twelve, and I had gotten off at one afterwards. When I got home, Leah and Alice were in the living room painting nails, and Sue and Renee were also there talking to the girls, and they were giggling and laughing like they were at a slumber party. When my mom saw me she stood up and ran towards me, arms open.

I felt her arms wrap around me tightly. I forgot how crazy she was, and how she was sometimes annoying, even being faraway like she is, and I hugged her back, wrapping my arms tightly around her. I missed her sometimes, and she smelt like the ocean, like she always had. Sometimes I got an overwhelming feeling of just wanting my mother, and this was one of them. Tears welled up in my eyes and I tried to fight them back.

" Hey! I've missed you so much, sweetie. Are you okay?"

" Yeah, I really missed you." I murmured as she kissed my forehead.

" Oh, baby I miss you, too? How's school going?"

" Good, it's going great. How's Florida?"

" Sunny! You have got to come visit sometime! I think you'd love it!"

" Maybe sometime in the summer."

She looked surprised, and so was I. I've always said no when she offered to let me stay for a week, but it actually sounded kind of good. I could smoke without anybody bashing me, no responsibilities with work. And I could get away from all the stress here.

" We'll plan it out, and have a fun girls week. So...Leah told me that you went to a party last night. I heard you sneaking in early this morning."

" It's nothing, mom."

" That means it's something. We'll talk later."

I rolled my eyes and headed into the kitchen to grab some salad that I knew they had for dinner last night. I was planning on raiding the fridge this morning, but I had no time and I ate at the diner as usual when I work early. And I saw some boiled egg in there, which made my mouth water.

" Oh, Bella! I hope you don't mind, but I gave Edward your number!" Leah yelled.

I walked out of the kitchen, wide-eyed, and shocked. Why would Leah give Edward my number? Hell, why would Edward even ask for my number?

I looked over at my mom and saw her smirking at me, and I tossed a glare right back in her direction before putting my eyes on Leah. She looked smug, knowing that she had successfully gotten to me by doing that.

" Leah! Why did you do that?" I demanded.

" He asked for it! I swear I didn't just hand it out to him. But he said you were cute, and I think you guys should go out, Alice totally agrees with me, and she's known Edward for a few years."

I headed back into the kitchen, mortified but kind of...excited. I ate my salad, drenched in Italian dressing. Afterwards I headed over to James' house really quick to drop off some money, when I got there, I saw Edward's car in the driveway, and I wondered why he was here.

With a shrug, I got out of the car and went to the front door, because his mother's car was gone. I rang the doorbell and knocked twice. About two minutes later he finally got there, looking confused a little bit, I held up a wad a cash and he nodded.

" Sorry to interrupt your little gay lovin' fest."

" Shut up, Swan. See ya, later."

" Bye, and pull up your damn pants."

**Authors Note- So…Reviews kind of flopped next chapter, but hopefully I get some more response. I appreciate all reviews that I receive, so thanks for all of the insight, sincerely,**

**Next chapter we definitely have some Edward and Bella action going on…And by action I think you know what I mean…**

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	6. Take This To Heart

**Authors Note- Hello everybody! Hope that you had a good week, and here is the next chapter! I'm sure plenty of you will like this one…**

**Disclaimer- S. Meyer owns all things Twilight.**

**Chapter Song- Take This To Heart by: Mayday Parade**

~\\~

BPOV

~\\~

_New Message_

_Unknown_

_2:17AM_

_Hey, baby._

Edward thought he could fuck with me, because he thought I didn't know it was him, I wasn't stupid, but I could play along with his game.

_Who is this?_

I replied

_Anybody you want me to be, Angel._

Could this guy get anymore cheesy?

_So in that case, you can be Edward Masen?_

_Been having some pretty wild and vivid_

_dreams about that guy._

I laughed at my own text.

_I fucking knew it!_

I smirked.

_You're an idiot. My sister told me that she pawned_

_my cell phone number off to you._

_-B_

I could only imagine how disappointed he was that I was just fucking around with him, and I hoped he was.

_So, what kind of dreams? Have any...Nice ones last night?_

_-E_

_It was a joke; go deflate your ego, ass._

_-B_

_You're cute_

_-E_

_And you are just so damn adorable._

_-B_

_Fuck you._

_-E_

_Rather you do it._

_-B_

_Wish I could, but it's getting rather late, and tomorrow_

_is a busy day, so I will talk to you later, Angel._

_-E_

I'd never acted so playful and flirty with a guy, and it made me smile. A part of me felt like a giddy teenage girl. I actually was for once.

I smirked and set my phone down, resuming the part of my book that I had been immersed in. A few minutes later I felt myself falling asleep, and I got up, put my book away, brushed my teeth and got into bed. When it was dark, and quiet, I sighed and grabbed my remote, turning the television on with the volume on low before turning over and closing my eyes.

A lot of the time, I needed a little bit of noise in order to fall asleep. When I was little, my dad used to put on my little boom box that had been in the corner of my room, and in the CD player, he would put in one that made weird ocean noises, but it always helped me fall asleep after about three tracks. Those memories seemed so far away. I distantly heard the voices on the television, and it lulled me to sleep slowly.

~\\~

" Bella, sweetheart?"

I felt my mother's hand resting on my shoulder softly.

" Come on, Bella."

I groaned and tried to burrow myself into my bed sheets. My mom laughed quietly and I felt the mattress shift with her weight. I turned over and rubbed my eyes, slightly looking up at her. She was as chipper as ever, and I rolled my eyes at the brightness in her eyes.

" Tired sweetheart?"

" No shit?" I asked her, laughing.

" Oh, don't be a smart ass...So, would you like to tell me about this boy? I've been curious all night."

I groaned and shook my head at her. Usually, I tell my mom a lot about my social life. She knows that I've drank before, but she never brings me down and belittles me about it. She understands, and trusts that I wouldn't ever let anything get out of hand. I never told her that I did pot, but she knows I smoke.

Yeah, maybe my mom was one of those 'cool' moms, but she still cared about me even after she moved away and got re-married. She e-mails me all the time, and gives a call when she can. Usually it's e-mail because she is busy, and on the road and at games she can type up an e-mail on her fancy phone.

" Come on, Bella. Where were you the night before, darling?"

" Well, my friend's boyfriend, Ben, was throwing a party. I'd met Edward earlier and he was going over to our friend James' house to hang out and I told him I'd stop by. Well, I went to the party a bit before Jess and Angela encouraged me to go. I went to James' house, we drank a bit and Edward and I ended up sleeping on James' couch together and I don't know, we were flirting a bit that night, and in the morning he drove me home, and he showed up at the diner while I was working...I think I really like him. He was really shy at first but now he's just a shameless flirt it seems."

She smiled, " Oh, I know those kinds of boys. So, what does he look like?"

" He's like, super tall. And I think he is skinny enough to rival me, and his arms are really long too. His hair is like this bronze-ish color, and he has really pretty green eyes. Super pale and just...He's so gorgeous."

My mom laughed at me and I glared at her.

" My little girl has a big crush."

" I think he likes me, too...But I don't know, I was facebook stalking him a bit."

" Oohh, Bella."

" I know...And there was a picture of him and this beautiful blonde girl. He used to live in Chicago before here. James knew him from when he lived there.

" Sweetheart, Chicago is far away, and unless this boy is playing with your heart, I don't think she matters anymore."

" I trust James to tell me if Edward has some hook up with a girl still. I mean, James is like my older brother, and we've been great friends for like three years. He'd never messed with me like that, ever."

Mom rubbed my arm back and forth over with her hand, and I sighed.

" Don't stress, Bella. You're only a teenage girl once, so have fun with it. And always be safe."

" I feel happier...Like I have something to look forward to, you know? Being here in this house...I hate it so much. Now I feel like there is an opportunity to be happy despite it all if something happens between us."

" I know, baby. I wish things weren't so hard here for you. I wish your father would..."

" I know, mom."

I rubbed my eyes and she kissed my forehead quickly.

" Now get all showered up, we have dinner to get started on. Oh, and when you are finished, is there any way that you can drop Alice off at home, her and Leah are having breakfast, and still have to get ready."

" Mhm, sure thing." I said, hopping out of my bed and stretching.

" Isabella Marie! Is that all you wear to bed? No wonder you've got boys crawling all over you."

I looked down, seeing my black tank top, which was a deep v-neck and showing plenty cleavage, and just my cotton striped boy shorts, which were underwear, but it's not like my dad or anybody else walks in my room while I sleep.

" It's not like I have boys sneaking in here." I snickered.

" You will soon. Now off to dress." she said, smiling as she walked out of my bedroom, locking it behind her.

I stripped off the rest of my clothes and got into the hot shower. I took my time in the shower, reveling in the warm water. Once I had finished I stepped out and wrapped a towel around my body, and a smaller one for my hair. I brushed my teeth and washed my face, and then got started on my makeup. I used a silvery color for my entire eyelid, and a little bit above it, and used a white shimmery highlighter powder on my brow bone. Once it was blended I brought it to my lash line and then put on some eyeliner and winged it slightly.

Once I finished with my makeup I did my hair, and decided to curl it today. They were in big curls once I had been done with my entire head, and I used a pin to pull it back from one side. My bangs swept off to the side, and I reached into my drawer for my tube of lip stick.

I rifled through my closet and put an outfit together. I grabbed my strapless white lace tunic with a black belt under the bust, a pair of skinny jeans that are black denim, and my black Christian Louboutin pumps. I finished the outfit with a necklace I had gotten from my mom last Easter. With Swarovski crystals that was in the shape of a butterfly, with matching drop earrings.

I sprayed on some midnight raspberry body mist and headed downstairs.

" Oh, you look absolutely beautiful today!" my mother fawned as Sue nodded quietly in agreement. That's a shock.

" Thanks. Where's Leah and Ali-"

" Right here! Ready to leave? And you look so cute by the way."

" Thanks. Got your things together?" I asked her.

" Yup, ready to go."

" You coming Leah?" I asked her.

" I have to shower. I'll text you later, Alice!" Leah said enthusiastically, embracing her.

" Okay, I'll be back soon." I told everybody as Alice hopped outside.

Luckily, it wasn't raining, and I got over to the truck and unlocked the door, and quickly got in to unlock the door for Alice, she hopped in with her bag on her lap and swung the door shut. I started up the car and put on the heat so she wouldn't freeze, and also the radio on low.

" Mind if I smoke, or will your parents kill me?"

" Oh please, Edward smokes around me all the time." Alice said, waving her hand at me.

I put the cigarette in my mouth and lit it up as I made a turn in my subdivision. I cruised along nicely, holding my arm out of the window so that the smoke wouldn't make the car smell like it. Alice tapped her foot and looked over at me.

" Do you like Edward?" she asked.

Apparently Alice liked being very forward.

" Uhm..."

" Yeah, I thought so."

" He's really nice, and cool to hang out with. We're just kind of getting to know each other."

" I know he really, really, likes you, which is pretty rare for Edward. But, be careful, okay? His life is kind of...complicated."

I wondered what she meant by complicated, but I didn't say anything after that. When I pulled up to the house, Alice thanked me for the ride, wished me a Happy Easter, and hopped right out of the car.

Just as I was backing up, I jerked to a stop when Edward's Volvo came to a jerky stop behind my car. I just about had a heart attack, and I knew he did it on purpose. I heard his car door slam and he leaned against his car, giving a nod in my rearview mirror. I killed the engine and stepped out of the car.

" What're you doing here?"

" Dropped your sister off." I stated as he walked towards me.

" Hm, I see."

" Did you need anything? I kind of have to get home."

" Just wanted to say hello...Why weren't you at James' last night?"

" I don't get high every night." I said, not wanting him to think that was the kind of girl I am.

" I wasn't assuming that you do."

" Yeah."

He glared playfully at me, " Someone a little edgy?"

" I just have to get home."

" Alrighty then."

Edward moved his car so that it was beside mine. And I got back in my car and put the key in the ignition. My stupid truck apparently took this as a time to not start up. I groaned and tried again, and again, but it wouldn't start. I looked out to see Edward smirking at me, and he came over to the driver's side of my door, where the window was open and leaned in.

" Car troubles?"

" Yeah..."

He laughed, " Come with me. My brother Emmett can take a look at it."

In a feeble attempted, I jerked the key again and still; nothing. Reluctantly, I got out of the car and slammed the door shut. Edward took my keys from me and started up the stairs towards the front door. I followed after him and he jiggled with the lock for a moment with his keys before the door swung open.

Holy fuck.

First, I thought that the house was beautiful, and second, I wondered how in the hell all of this was all done when they just moved in. The walls were painted a cream color.

I stepped into the foyer and saw the staircase that curved upstairs and was a medium/dark wood, and in the middle of the foyer was a round table, same wood as the stairs, with a huge bouquet of flowers in a vase, and hanging from the wall ceiling was an ornate chandelier, and on the upper high walls there were pictures in black and gold frames. To my right looked to be a library/office. In the middle of the room was a huge wooden desk with a desktop computer on it, with a plant off to the side, and another taller desk against the wall, pictures on both sides of it, with a few books. I also noticed another open doorway that I could only see a smaller bookcase. There was a huge window, and a brown couch near the open doorway, a long rug spread out.

To my left was the dining room, more pictures on the walls, and to the left there was built in shelves. In the middle of the room there was a wood paneled wall, and flanked on each side were walls made of glass, but pushed back, and near one of the walls was a bathroom. The middle of the room was a six seated table, round with dark wood, and upholstered chairs with a cool light above it that looked like glass/crystal balls.

The floor in the entire house that I'd seen so far was very dark and fucking shiny as hell, like it was freshly waxed an hour ago.

In the living room, there were two French door openings to enter, one right to the left when you walk in, and another a little bit more forward down a very short hallway that had a door on the right to a bathroom I guessed, or a closet.

I followed Edward straight through the foyer and I stopped when I saw the living room. There were three windows on a corner wall; two on one side, and one on the other, there were two three-four seater black couches with a few décor pillows. A glass coffee table was aligned with each and then they had a big entertainment center with a big television and many shelves to the left of it.

When we entered the kitchen, I had frozen completely. It was a kitchen, but to the left there was like a second family room, it was more formal.

The ceiling was spectacular to start, with some dark wooden design on top with beams, with small lights in the ceiling above installed in, which were like spotlights. A little more to the left was the living room area, a huge rug in the middle, with a coffee table in the middle, and two loveseats and a single cream chair off to the side, with wooden arms. Behind the loveseat in the middle was a tall table with two lamps on it, and little figurines, and in front of the coffee table and couch, a few inches away was a huge fireplace. All the way down straight to the other side two single arm chairs, and another tall table on the sides of each of them, with two more matching lamps, and the entire wall were windows from ceiling to floor. Now, off to the right, was the kitchen. There was another table set that was on a two stair up pedestal and two white columns on the sides, with a gold chandelier, and in the kitchen there was an island, with two chairs at the side and a bouquet of flowers, along the side at the end of the kitchen, just a few feet from the couch was a long counter with a chair near it. The cabinets above the counters all the way to the right were a dark wood wood with glass doors with wooden frames, and a big window over the sink, and stainless steel appliances.

" Oh my god."

Edward rolled his eyes and tossed his keys on the long counter. I saw a woman at the sink washing her hands, back to us. But I noticed her long bronze colored hair, which was slightly darker then Edward's. She had a slim body, and looked pretty average height. When the sink turned off, she turned around and looked at Edward, smiling at him until her gaze went to me and then she looked curious.

She was almost as pale as her son, but she wasn't as tall and super skinny like him either. Her eyes were a hazel color, and she had very straight angular features like Edward. Very defined, but her's were still feminine and soft.

" Edward, sweetheart, who is this?"

" Mom, this is Bella, and Bella this is my mother, Esme Cullen."

" It's very nice to meet you. You have a beautiful home."

She smiled proudly, " Thank you very much."

" Do you know where Emmett is? Bella's car isn't starting up so I was going to have him look at it."

" Oh, he's upstairs right now."

" Alright, thank you. Come on."

Without any warning I felt Edward's hand wrap around mine, his long fingers braiding through mine and sending a wave of shock throughout my body.

" It was very nice to meet you Bella, come back soon."

I smiled at her and Edward tugged me along with him. When we got to the stairs I attempted to break from his grasp but he didn't release me. My heels clicked on the hard wood as he led me upstairs in front of him. At the top of the stairs there were many doors to the left, and one to the right, and then a long hallway to the right. We walked down that hallway, and there was French doors leading out to a balcony out there, and it was very open in the hallway, and on the left side was a balcony, and when I looked down it was a library, which looked to be what was in the opened door that I saw in the office room to the right of the foyer, but I wasn't able to see farther. The library went up high, and there was even a sliding ladder. On the other wall it was pure glass, and I was fascinated by how awesome it looked.

" Do you like it?"

" It's absolutely beautiful."

He smiled and stopped at the first door at the end of the long hallway, and he knocked twice before opening the door.

And there was Emmett, in his bed, with Rosalie Hale on him and they were shamelessly making out. Edward sighed as Emmett blankly ignored him.

" Hey, jackass. My friend here needs you to look at her car."

Rosalie looked up and Emmett gave Edward the middle finger. When Rosalie's eyes met mine, her eyes went hard and she glared at me. If looks could kill I would have been dead.

" What the fuck is emo, weed smoking, bitch doing here?"

" Emmett, put a fucking leash on your girlfriend will you? And a muzzle?" Edward said as Emmett got up.

" Figures you'd end up with her Emoward. It's been not even a week, and I'm sure I could hook you up with someone who is actually a girl. Oh, wait, right! You guys can go get drunk and high together."

" You know what Rosalie, get off your fucking high horse. Being a bitch makes you ugly, not that you ever had looks to start with."

I stifled a laugh and Edward smirked in her direction as she gave him the death glare.

I was also surprised that Edward was defending me in front of her, and still holding my hand for some reason unknown. I looked down at our hands and smiled just slightly at them together.

Rosalie was silent after that, and Emmett said nothing as he stepped out into the hall.

" So, what's the problem?"

" It won't start, and thanks so much for this."

" It's cool, no problem." he said, smiling.

I handed him my keys and he jogged down the hall and disappeared to the left to go down the stairs. Edward slammed the door shut for his bedroom, leaving Rosalie alone in there, and I stood next to Edward.

" Sorry about her..."

" Hey, I've dealt with her since elementary school. So I know her bitchy qualities."

Edward laughed and started heading down the hall further, past all of the doors until there was three steps up, down a short hall and another door. He stopped and grabbed a key from his pocket and unlocked the door.

I watched him closely and curiously as he unlocked the door and opened it slightly. Edward opened the door to me and pulled me inside, and suddenly I was pressed up against the door with Edward standing so close.

My breathing hitched in surprise and I stood still against the door.

" No camera phones."

" Why?"

" Because not many girls ever have the privilege to see my room, and I don't want you sharing."

" You just want to take my phone so that you can get me alone and vulnerable."

" We are alone." he murmured. " And I can have you vulnerable soon enough."

I felt an involuntary shiver run through my body and Edward moved away from me.

His room was very...Edward. When I walked in I saw the wall ahead, and the wall to my left were glass, in black frame around them. On the left of the glass wall was a flat white lounger, a few books at the end of it, and there was a weird bookcase that was almost like a CD tower, instead for books. On the front glass wall was a small soft chair with no arms, but a small end table next to it. On the right wall the head of his bed was in the middle, it was an amber gold color, and had black wrought iron posts, and an iron design on the top with white almost flowers designed into it, there was also two fabric curtains, same color of the bed, tied to the posts at the head of the bed, and on each side of his bed there were shelves into the wall, which were absolutely filled with books, CD's, movies and records all of sorts, and at the end of the wall, near the small soft chair was a door which I guessed was for the bathroom.

On the wall of the bedroom door to my left was a huge expensive looking stereo system, which looked like it cost more than everything in my room put together.

In the corner of the room beyond the lounger, there was a rectangular odd lamp at the end of the lounger, and in the corner was a tall, thin, black wooden dresser that was on a slant, so each of the side, if pushed in, would touch both sides of the glass wall, and it wasn't just pushed against one wall, so it faced the bed more. On top of the dresser was a flat screen, and I also saw a picture frame on it, but couldn't see who it was.

" Reach your standards?" he asked, breaking me out of my reverie.

I smiled at him, " Of course not."

He smirked at me and I walked forward, my shoes sinking into the plush white carpet. I paused for a moment and looked down.

" Should I take these off?"

" You can keep them on."

I walked over to his white lounger and sat down, looking around his room once more before relaxing.

" You alright?"

" Yes, I'm fine."

" If it makes you uncomfortable to be in here you can tell me." he murmured, coming to sit at the end of his bed as he watched me closely.

" So, you and James were good friends back in Chicago?"

" We grew up together basically, almost like brothers." Edward said.

" Yeah..."

" He'd been talking about you to me for awhile. Since you were like fifteen."

" Yeah, I kinda got into his crowd that summer before I turned fifteen."

" Was it that bad?"

" Your parents divorced. You tell me? I never saw it coming, they never fought in front of me or anything...It was such a shock when I heard about it. And then when my dad started hanging out with Sue, who is now my step mother...I guess I got jealous that he paid more attention to her than me so I got a lip ring, started smoking and doing pot. After my mom left...my dad started working me and he wouldn't talk to me. I think it's because I look like her, and I'm a constant reminder of their marriage that fell apart. Even after he got married we never talk. And if we do it's always a fight.

" I'm really sorry, Bella... Yeah, the divorce was shitty to say the least. I'm still really close with my dad though. He still lives back in Chicago but he said he'd fly out here when he can."

" How long has your mom been re-married?"

" Almost three years. But Esme and Carlisle met back in Chicago, well, actually Evanston. But, Carlisle got an amazing position out here, and my mom wanted to get away from all the shit in the city so I was forced away from Chicago and to Washington. How the fuck do you stand it?"

" You get used to it. But I am getting out of here as soon as I can."

" I guess I'm just so fucking used to the city, and my old friends."

" Yeah, that must suck."

" It does, but I pulled a lot of shit back in Chicago with my parents. Like you with the piercings. I came home with one the day the divorce was finalized, and...Well, medical shit that I've gone through. The ear piercings were just when I got fucking bored. And I got my tongue ring when they told me we were moving." he said, showing me the silver ball in the center of his tongue.

I laughed and shook my head at him. " Can't forget that."

He smiled at me, " Is your stepmom at least nice?"

" Yeah, she's nice. Civil, and is pretty short with me but...I don't know, everything just got fucked up when my parents divorced."

" Sounds like it...God, I'd have no idea what I would do if I were you. If my dad stopped talking to me and just ignored me I would probably flip my shit."

" It's hard, but it just gives me more fuel to want to get out of here."

" Yeah...I know what that is like."

" So your older then Emmett, right? What happened to you medically as you said? You don't have to say anything. I'm just curious."

" Maybe I'll tell you some other time."

I heard my cell phone going off near Edward, and I looked at him. " How?"

" You are easily distracted when pressed against a door." he stated, tossing it to me.

I answered my phone and leaned back against the glass wall.

" Hello,"

" Hey, sweetie. Where are you?" my mother asked worriedly through the phone.

" I'm stuck at the Cullen's because my car won't start. So my friend's step brother is looking at my car for me."

" Oh, Edward."

" Not now, okay? I'll be home soon."

" Okay, Bella."

The phone clicked and then I hung up afterwards and looked over at Edward who was watching me still.

" Is it alright that I'm here?"

" Yeah, it's fine." Edward assured me.

I put my phone in my pocket and looked outside, seeing the large, expansive backyard. There was a pool in back, and metal rods on the ground many feet away, and a tarp that looked like it was a trampoline in the making. There was a garden against the house that I could see; which was beautiful. It was now obvious where the beautiful bouquets downstairs had come from.

The house really was gorgeous, they were lucky to live here and have all of these things. I wished my parents' divorce had worked out like his, in the fact that both of his parents are still active in his life and love him. But I guess not all of us get lucky in that way. Not everything is a clean break.

Suddenly, I felt Edward sitting closely beside me. I turned my head and saw how close he was really sitting next to me. He looked at me. And it didn't feel like he was _just looking _at me. It felt different. It was like he was staring into my soul and trying to study me in some way. As if I were a mystery to be figured out.

His hand rested at the nape of my neck, and I felt his other one rest on my waist.

" Is this okay?" he whispered.

I didn't answer him, and instead leaned forward until his lips pressed against mine, the cool steel of his lip ring pressed against my mouth. The feeling of his lips against mine wasn't anything that I could describe in any way besides it felt perfect. His lips were gentle, and soft against mine in a way that made me want to melt into him.

My arms hesitantly wrapped themselves around his neck, and I felt Edward push me back slowly and kneel with one knee between my legs. Keeping our mouths fused together he brushed all the books off the end of the lounger and he leaned over me, one hand smoothing over my hair and the other on the side of my neck. My heart was beating like crazy, and I was breathing heavily through my nose.

He gave me a few slow, chaste kisses before his lips fully moved against mine. Edward's mouth slanted over my life, and I loosened one arm from his neck and moved it down his side. I heard his quiet moan and felt it against my lips. His lips parted and I felt his tongue brush against my bottom lip, the smooth metal of his tongue ring brushing against it slightly. My small moan spurred him on and I felt his hand move down to my waist, his long fingers grazing my stomach lightly. His mouth moved to my bottom lip, and he sucked it into his mouth as his tongue flicked my lip ring.

It felt fucking amazing as hell. Best feeling ever. It was the greatest kiss I'd ever received, and I didn't even open my mouth. I followed his ministrations and ran my tongue along his lip.

Then I heard two loud knocks on Edward's bedroom door. We both pulled away from each other and I sat up quickly. Edward stood up and walked to the door as I fixed my hair and just sat there, pretending nothing even happened and trying to make my breathing more even in a discrete way.

Emmett poked his head in and smiled. " Car's all fixed, just something loose is all."

" Thanks, Emmett. I appreciate it very much." I said, standing up and smoothing my shirt. Emmett tossed me my keys, which I caught expertly.

Edward walked with me down the hallway, and Emmett disappeared back in his room, giving me a wink to let me know he knew what had happened before he walked in. Neither Edward or I said anything at all; I followed him, shamelessly checking out his ass. When we got downstairs he opened the front door and let me go out first. I hopped down each of the stairs and went straight for my car.

I opened up the door and before I got in, I felt Edward's hand on my wrist. I reluctantly looked up at him. He put his long finger underneath my chin and leaned down to kiss me.

" I've been waiting to do that since I knocked you on your ass." he whispered against my lips.

" That was the first day we met."

" I know."

I pulled away from him and looked at my car. " I have to go."

" Are you upset with me?" he asked.

My mind was racing if anything. I wasn't upset at him. I wanted that kiss.

Gathering up my courage, I leaned up to kiss him and pulled away slowly.

" Not at all."

I hopped in the truck and shut the door. Luckily, it started this time and Edward gave me a slight wave as I backed out and turned the car around. As I drove down the long driveway I took a deep breath, trying to believe that what had just happened was not just a dream.

**Authors Note- Alright so….**

**First kiss! I hope that you all liked it, even though it was interrupted. More Edward and Bella coming soon!**

**Reviews were awesome last chapter! Thanks so much for the response, it's been making my writing juices flow and I can barely take my hands off the keyboard these days! Keep up with the response, I definitely want to hear what you guys think with this one!**

**LINKS!**

**Links for the Cullen house are in my profile! Such as the foyer, living room, kitchen and so on! Also a link for Bella's outfit! All in my profile so check them out!**

**Review!**


	7. Take Me As You Found Me

**Authors Note- Happy Friday. I hope you all had a good week!**

**Disclaimer- S. Meyer owns all things Twilight.**

**Chapter Song; Take Me ( As You Found Me) by: Anberlin**

**(It's kinda vampire-ish oddly)**

~\\~

BPOV

~\\~

I didn't respond to Edward's text that I had gotten later that day.

When I got home I was shuffled straight into the kitchen and put on the duty of peeling potatoes. Phil sat awkwardly in one of the chairs near the kitchen window, and my father was in the living room with Jake and Seth, watching them play one of their video games on the Playstation 2.

Leah kept giving me sideways glances whenever the opportunity was available. I didn't know what she wanted, or what she meant by that. Despite her odd behavior, she was hopping around the kitchen in a pair of purple flats, a grey ruffled skirt and a lavender top with a ruffle design in the front. Her hair was pulled back smoothly and face clean.

" What was wrong with your car, Bella?" My mother asked.

" Something was loose is all." I said, cutting the potatoes in cubes and putting them in the pot of water.

She nodded and I paid attention to the cutting. Once I had finished with all of the potatoes, I put the pot on the stove, but didn't yet turn it on because it was too early. The ham was in the oven, and the bread dumplings were all good, just had to be warmed up before we ate, the gravy had to wait also.

I headed outside on to the porch and sat in the glider that was placed on our porch, and sat down slowly, leaning back against it. I held my pack of cigarettes and took one out and grabbed my lighter. Once one was light up I took a deep drag and let it out.

I was pretty confused as to what I was going to do about Edward.

The kiss that he'd given me was...Well, to say in the least, the most amazing kiss that I've ever gotten in my entire life. The way he kissed me felt like he just couldn't get enough and only wanted more, which I'd admit it was nice. He felt right, and I only wanted more, too.

I wasn't sure what was going to happen from here. Obviously Edward expressed that he liked me, and even said out loud that he wanted to kiss me since the day we met. There was absolutely no doubt in my mind that I liked him, but I wasn't sure if it was right. I've never been in an actual relationship, not one that involved going out to see movies on weekends, holding hands and being affectionate in a way that was romantic and intimate. I had no fucking clue what it meant to be in a real relationship.

Yeah, I've made out with a few guys, were they guys that would hold me if I wanted, or would give me one of those sweet forehead kisses? Fuck no.

Did I even want a boyfriend who gave me forehead kisses?

I mentally slapped myself for sounding so stupid and took another drag of my cigarette.

What the fuck did I have to lose?

Complete gorgeousness.

Fucking amazing lips.

Yeah, it had absolutely nothing to do with any of that...

~\\~

Dinner was...rough.

With Phil and Charlie sitting at the same table together, nothing was going to go completely right. It was like Charlie and I having dinner; tense as hell. Between disagreements on views about the government, how the president is doing in office and everything from that all the way down to fucking baseball was just bad, including everything between. They glared at each other, snickered and scoffed to the point where I was about to just go eat upstairs in my bedroom.

It was like high school almost. Trying to one each other up, and try to make their reason seem like the right one. It was like opinions didn't even exist in their world, it was either right or wrong; that was it, end of story. I knew that this competition had absolutely nothing to do with my mother. Renee was happy with Phil, and Charlie is happy with Sue. I think...

Phil and my father are just so different to the point where they just clash badly. In part though, I know that my dad was confused as to how my mother even lived with this man. With how fun-loving and crazy she is Phil's stiff attitude and stern ways were the exact opposite in my mother.

Renee had not one stern bone in her body. She wasn't really ever in the least bit serious.

Once dinner was over, I basically sprinted for the kitchen.

Renee and Sue basically forced all of the boys to clean up all of the dishes while we went in the living room. Somehow Sue even persuaded them to bring out the apple pies that she had made last night with my mother. The television was on, and we were all really forced to watch at least a half hour of news. I had no idea what kind of point that made; but I endured it.

Eventually, I made up some excuse about being extremely exhausted from not getting much sleep the night before, and headed upstairs. Once I got to my bedroom I locked the door with a sigh and leaned against it.

I put my hair up in a ponytail and stripped out of my clothes, slipping the strapless top off first. I kicked off my shoes and tugged my skinny jeans off. I put on a white racer back and a pair of black sleep pants, and then just tossed a red pullover hoodie on and reached over for my phone, which was blinking with a message.

When I picked up my phone, I saw that I had two. One from Jess wishing me a good holiday, and wondering if I wanted to hang out on Tuesday, which I replied to with a yes, and then saw that I had another message from Edward, this one a little bit depressing, and had been sent to my phone only a few minutes before I got to my bedroom.

_New Message_

_From: Edward Masen_

_9:23PM_

_Bella,_

_I'm sorry if what had happened this afternoon freaked you out._

_I hope that you don't think that I was taking advantage of you._

_Kissing you was a little bit forward, but I won't lie and say I didn't like it._

_I hope you won't say that you never wanted it._

_Coffee, tonight?_

_-E_

I sighed and leaned my head back on my pillow.

He was...I couldn't explain it. I stared at the text over and over again before sitting up and sliding up my phone to reply.

_Coffee sounds great._

_Forks Corner Coffee,_

_Meet you at 10_

_-B_

I hopped out of bed ten minutes later, after getting his reply, and switched my pajama pants for a pair of jeans. They were just nice straight leg, dark wash jeans. I slipped into them easily and buttoned them quickly. I grabbed my converse and laced them up, and reached for my keys from my desk. I shoved them in my pocket, grabbed my cigarettes, lighter, twenty bucks and my cell phone.

When I got downstairs, everybody was in the living room, and their eyes were all on me once they saw me. My mother raised an eyebrow at me.

" I'm going out with a friend."

" Be safe." she replied

I swung the front door open and shut it, just as I was reaching my car I heard the front door opening and closing. Leah appeared soon enough and she walked over to me, giving me a look like she wanted to know what the hell was going on.

" Okay, first you are chilling at the Cullen's house, and now you are going out at ten to hand with a friend? What's going on, Bella?"

" When did you become so interested in my life, Leah? I'll see you later."

She glared at me before walking back in the house. I hopped into the car and started it up, then quickly pealed out of the driveway and headed out. The drive to the coffee shop wasn't long at all, everything in Forks that someone would need is only about ten minutes, or less, away from them at the longest.

I started getting a little bit nervous when I got closer, and wondered what we were going to do. Just sit and talk about how we made out? I guess I could go for that...

With a sigh I pulled into the parking lot and I already saw Edward's shiny Volvo. I parked in the empty space next to it and hopped out. I slammed the door and smoothed over my jeans, and with a deep sigh I leaned against my car and took out my cigarette from earlier. I finished off the cigarette with a few puffs.

With every ounce of courage I had I walked into the familiar coffee shop and cast around a look.

Edward sat in the way corner table, his elbows on the edge of the table and one hand rubbing behind his leg. One of his long legs were bouncing, his foot tapping on the floor.

As quietly as I could, I walked over to him and pulled out the chair that he was not seated in. His gaze looked up once he saw me and he smiled slightly. I sat down and set my keys on the table next to his, along with my cellphone, cigarette's and lighter.

" Hey."

" Hey, what's up?"

" Nothing really. How about you?" he replied lightly.

" Oh, you know, just having coffee at ten at night."

Edward laughed and shook his head at me.

" What do you want, it's on me." he stated, starting to stand.

" You really don't have to pay."

" I invited you, therefore, I pay."

" Java Chip, please."

He nodded once and headed over to the counter and put the orders in. I heard him say something about caramel and vanilla to the lady before sliding money over. I felt guilty that he paid for mine, but as long as he wasn't making a big deal I wasn't going to. I appreciated it.

Once they had finished getting the drinks together he brought them back to the table, setting them down, I noticed they were to-go cups. He slid mine over to me and I thanked him. Before he sat down he walked closer towards me and he bent down to kiss my forehead, his hand on the side of my face. I felt the cool steel of his lip rings on my skin, and shivered.

Maybe I did want one of those boyfriends who gave me those kisses.

My eyes closed slightly, and opened when he pulled away to sit down in his chair. I fucking blushed like a little girl and looked down, hearing his quiet chuckle as I did so. When I looked back up at him he was sipping his coffee, but still smiling at me.

" What was that for?"

" You're cute and I thought you needed it."

I took a few sips of my coffee, enjoying the taste of it thoroughly.

" Let's go." he said, grabbing my hand. Sparks shot up my arm.

" Where are we going?"

" Well, first, you are going to drop your car off at home, and then you and I are going somewhere."

" Why do I have to drop my car off at home?"

" Because, I want to take you somewhere."

" Where are we going?"

He pulled me out of my chair, handed me my keys, cigarette's, phone and lighter, ignoring my look of confusion and surprise.

I trusted him. Something in my heart told me that this was right, and my brain enthusiastically agreed. With another kiss on my forehead; he released me. I went over and opened my door and hopped in quickly. The engine started up smoothly and I set my coffee in the cup holder.

Edward followed me the entire way home and when I pulled into the driveway, I saw the curtains in the front window rustle. With a groan, I got out of the car, grabbing my things. Edward was parked on the curb, and I knew he was probably smirking at me right now. I knew that someone knew I came home, but I doubt they cared.

" Get your sweet ass over here already." I heard Edward shout out the window.

Without one look back, I ran towards his car and hopped in, shutting the door. Edward peeled away from the curb, his car only making a light purring noise. I put my seatbelt on, put my drink in the cup holder and leaned back.

" Sweet ass, huh?" I asked, smirking at him.

" You bet."

" Where are we going?"

" You ask too many questions."

" I'm just curious."

He glared at me playfully and put his eyes back on the road.

" So, I dropped my car off at home, even after someone saw me, and ran for your car. All of this just to spend time with you. What do I get?"

" Would you like me to take you to my house and lock you in my bedroom so I can reward you all night?"

Hell, yeah.

" Tempting."

" Very."

" Maybe I could make use of those condoms James gave me." I murmured, reaching over to rest my hand on his thigh.

I needed the skin and felt his muscle's tighten underneath my touch. I moved my hand up and down his thigh, messing with him a bit about my previous comment. I felt his hand cover mine and he moved it upwards and to his inner thigh. Just before I reached the promise land, I took my hand off his thigh and rested it on my knee. I have no idea what possessed me to be so bold.

" Oh, you're a fucking tease."

I smiled.

Edward suddenly put the car into a stop, and put the gear into park. When I looked out, all I saw was the dark woods. The trees were tall, and above I could see how to moon hit them, creating a silvery glow. I looked over at Edward, and his back was turned as he got out of the car, taking his keys, cellphone and coffee with him. I noted that something was tucked under his arm. Before I could think he was at my door in less than a second, holding his hand out for me. I put my car keys on the seat and stuffed my phone in my pocket. I grabbed my coffee and used the other hand to take his, feeling familiar sparks shoot up my arm.

Once the car door was shut, he clicked something on his keys before stuffing them into his pocket along with his phone. He stepped away from the car, taking me with him. I followed him along the edge of the woods, and the car eventually got further away until I was unable to see it.

Edward led us through the woods them, expertly like he'd done it a million times before. I stumbled a bit, but he kept me standing thankfully. He weaved through the trees, hopped over fallen trunks; ones that he helped lift me over much to my embarrassment. But it paled in comparison to the thought of falling over it myself.

We were walking for a good fifteen minutes until I started wondering where he was taking me. Finally, we got deep in the woods, and the trees were getting close together and heavily populated around the area. There was moss stuck to them, and little canopies from the willows. Edward pulled back one of the canopies and suddenly we were in a small clearing.

It was beautiful, and almost dreams like. The ground was dry, but grass was sprung up everywhere, with purple and blue flowers appearing in random places. But when I looked up, I saw the moon, and when I looked out, it light up the entire area, bathing it the beautiful, silvery light.

I didn't know what to say, I was awestruck.

" Back in Chicago I kind of had a knack for finding places like these in the woods, and I used to spend a lot of my time thinking out in the woods, or to clear my head. And just the other day, I found this. It was the most fucking beautiful place I've found yet."

I took a hesitant step forward and kept moving until I was in the middle. Suddenly, Edward was behind me; his chest pressed against my back.

" I thought of you when I was here."

Before I could stop the words they escaped my mouth.

" Why me? Out of all the girls you could pick, why am I so special?"

" Because even in the short amount of time I've known you; I know that you are different from the others. You aren't a stuck up preppy bitch. There are so many other girls I've seen here; in Chicago that like that, but you...You're something special."

I felt the hairs on my neck stick up and felt my body heat up.

I turned around and saw his deep green eyes staring down at me. Before I was getting lost in a sea of green; I looked away, and took a few more steps around the little meadow.

" How many girls have you used that line on?"

" None."

" I still don't get it."

" The past...year...James has been telling me that I needed to fly out here to meet you. He was convinced that both of us were going to fall in love and run away together, as a joke of course. But he talked about you like you were some goddess to be worshipped or something, and I thought he was just trying to fuck with me. And when I met you, I realized that you really were special, something to talk about. And I know it sounds weird but it was almost like I already knew you. He talked about you a lot on the phone, saying that we would be perfect together. When my girlfriend completely dumped me when I was seventeen I was heartbroken. I didn't think that I would really give a shit about any other girl; then I met you and I felt like I could feel for someone like that again, but it feels different."

" I'm not as great as you think I am, okay? I...I live in a house where three fourths the time I am alone and ignored. The only people I think might care for me are James, and my friend Jess and sometimes Angela. And the two people that mattered the most to me in the world...One of them lives across the country and the other wants absolutely nothing to do with me and hates me. I spend all of my time either working or at school so that I can graduate early and get out of here, because as much as I love my friends, there is nothing I want more than to get out of here. And you are just...amazing. I don't deserve someone as great as you...I really don't, and I really wish you would see that."

I caught my breath and cast a look in his direction.

With a step forward there was no more space between us and I felt his hands cradle my face gently.

" You're like a broken angel who's wings I want to fix... Bella, you do matter. And I care about you. Sometimes I'm astounded how much I care about you when I just met you days ago. But there is something about you that I can't figure out that makes me want to be with you. I want you Bella. I feel absolutely terrible that there are people in this world who have torn you up like they have. You don't deserve it. And I'm not saying all this because I want to get in your fucking pants. I'm saying it because I mean it and its how I feel."

Nobody had ever said anything like that to me, and I almost felt terrified. I felt like he had just told me that I was his beloved soul mate or some shit, that I was _the one_.

It was astounding how my life had suddenly been twisted and thrown around in just a week, and now someone I'd been crushing on for just a few days just confessed that he thought I was something special and that I made him feel something he hadn't felt before, but in a different way. And he wanted me...

" I've never...experienced this, or felt like this before." I whispered.

" Don't be afraid."

He bent down and I felt his lips touch mine gently. I couldn't describe it, but the way his soft lips molded to mine felt more amazing than anything I'd ever felt in my life. Without hesitance, Edward slowly glided his lips over mine, and one hand that was placed on my cheek slid over my neck, and down over my body until his arm wound around my waist. Edward tugged me closer and I moved my arms to wrap around him.

I slanted my mouth over his and touched his jaw with my fingers. The way he held me made me feel safe, and cared for. I leaned into him completely and he pulled away slowly and chastely kissed my lips. Edward bent down to retrieve the blanket he brought and he spread it out and grasped my hand, sitting down and encouraging me to do the same.

He sat closer to me and pulled me in his arms. I rested my head on his shoulder and felt him hold me closely. He smelt like vanilla, cinnamon, musk and a hint of cigarettes. It still smelt amazing. I felt his hand in mine, long fingers placed between mine.

I felt his lips on the top of my head and I looked up at him. He lifted his hand to brush my bangs out of my eyes.

" You're beautiful."

" So are you." I replied, touching his bottom lip with my fingers lightly.

For awhile we were quiet, just listening to the quiet sounds around us, and letting the moon bathe us in silver light as we sat in the middle of the clearing. I didn't want to leave this place, and I felt like it all too perfect. Edward made a move to lie down on the fleece blanket and I laid next to him, resting my head in the place just under his collarbone and shoulder

" When I was sixteen, I found out that I had Marfan Syndrome." Edward started. "It's why I'm so tall and have such long limbs. Usually it's genetic, but the doctors said that I was somehow a fluke. I was really scared at that time, and I almost suffered a collapsed lung while I was in the hospital once. The syndrome has a lot to do with connective bone tissue; they said that I was lucky they caught it. I started having heart problems. I had a heart murmur and my heart valves were leaking. I'd had it for awhile they said."

I looked up at him, " What about now, are you okay?"

" I take medicine every day. After the doctors found out they immediately put me on prescription medicine. If left un-noticed I could have died. Before I was diagnosed I was having a lot of trouble with joint pains, chest pains and breathing problems. They said I was really lucky."

" Are you sure? I mean, nothing can just happen to you randomly? What abo-"

" Bella, I'm alright." he assured me, holding me closer to his side.

" Okay."

He moved his head to the side and I felt his nose touch my neck. Slowly his hand moved to glide over my waist and I sighed.

" What are you doing tomorrow?"

" Uh, I don't really know. My mom is leaving tomorrow. I want to spend some time with her a bit."

" Well, how about later on I pick you up and we can go out to dinner."

I was slightly stunned. " Really?"

" Yeah...sure. I'm still getting to know the area, but I know there are places out in Port Angeles."

" Sure...That would be nice."

My first date!

" Around six thirty okay?" he asked.

I nodded, " That's perfect."

Edward turned my face to the side and pressed his lips to mine smoothly.

Correction; That was perfect.

**Authors Note- I know this chapter was kind of short, but it definitely made up for it in how heavy it kind of was with emotion. No links for this chapter, but please send me a review! I reply to all of them and I love to hear everybody's response!**

**Review!**


	8. Uncharted

**Authors Note- I know this is late, and I sincerely apologize. **

**Disclaimer- S. Meyer owns all things Twilight.**

**Chapter Song- Uncharted by: Sara Bareilles**

~\\~

BPOV

~\\~

Edward had dropped me off at my house only ten minutes before one. He didn't want me to keep me out too late because of my parents. They wouldn't care; but he was being sweet. The night had been...fucking magical. Yeah, magical.

The moment we were leaving the meadow, Edward had promised me that we would come back sometime soon, and I really hoped he knew that I was going to be holding him to that. I wanted to see it during the day especially, maybe a day that the sun was finally out and shining down.

When Edward dropped me off, he hadn't gone up to the door to walk me. Infact, I had to basically stop him because he insisted to. I didn't know if there was going to be any peaking eyes looking out of the windows.

Edward wished me a goodnight and his hand released mine. I had gotten out of the car swiftly, with probably the goofiest grin on my face. When I had gotten into the house, it was completely pitch black, and I headed upstairs as quietly as I could. I opened up my bedroom door and shut it quietly behind me, turning the light on. I kicked my shoes off, tossed my hoodie on my bed and went to the bathroom, relieving my bladder that was crying for attention. I brushed my teeth and combed through my tangled hair. I needed to wash it, especially after laying in grass, but I was too exhausted to care.

I put on a pair of sleep boxers and got ready for slep.

I clicked on the television and put on Family Guy. Once I hopped into bed, I heard my phone going off.

_New Text Message_

_1:07AM_

_From: Edward Masen_

_Just wanted to let you know something for tomorrow._

_Short skirt and five inch heels._

_-E_

I smirked.

_We going to a bar?_

_-B_

_I was just kidding. Be comfortable_

_-E_

_I never said a short skirt and heels were uncomfortable._

_-B_

_You torture me._

_-E_

_Don't pretend not to like it._

_-B_

_Who said that I was pretending in the first place?_

_You should get some sleep, Angel._

_I'll text you before I leave to pick you up tomorrow._

_-E_

_That sounds great. Goodnight, Edward._

_-B_

_Goodnight, Bella._

_-E_

I set my phone down on my end table, sinking into my mattress heavily and glad that I could sleep in tomorrow. At this point, it was sounding pretty heavenly to sleep late after everything today. I fell asleep with thoughts of Edward, and the remembrance of how his lips felt as they pressed against mine the last thing on my mind.

~\\~

When I awoke in the morning, I could hear the rain tapping on the window. And this would sound annoying to most people, but living in Forks, hell, living in Washington in general, it's something easy to get used to, especially growing up here.

I flipped onto my stomach and buried my face into the pillow next to me. I opened my eyes just a crack and saw that it was just past eleven. I groaned and let out a deep sigh. Slowly I sat up and rubbed my eyes, groaning again when I saw my makeup coming off.

Shower.

I took my time heading to the shower, allowing myself to wake up a bit before doing anything. I went to the bathroom and first cleaned my face off, getting all the dried on and clumped mascara, and everything else that smeared. Once my face was clean I took a shower.

I didn't really pay much attention on what to wear; I figured I could change later. I put on a black band t-shirt of some sort, a pair of skinny jeans, and my flat shoes. I blow dried my hair, and then straightened it. I put it in a ponytail that draped over my shoulder, leaving my bangs to hang down. I didn't do much makeup really, and then just finished with everything else and headed downstairs.

My dad had made breakfast, which was the only meal he could prepare. Pecan pancakes, homemade maple syrup, bacon, hash browns and scrambled eggs. When he saw me, he was obviously not pleased. Especially when he saw the cigarette and lighter in my hands as I headed out back. I sat down in one of the chairs and looked out into the open forest behind the house.

Suddenly, I heard the back screen door open and close, and my mother sat down in the chair across from me.

" So, where were you last night?" she asked, smiling.

I rolled my eyes, " With a friend."

" Does his name happen to be Edward?"

My blush gave me away instantly, and she smirked.

" Where'd you go."

" Got some coffee, and just kind of hung out."

" Is that what the kids call it now a days? I hope you were safe."

I choked on the smoke in my lungs. Once I could breathe, I looked at her, my eyes wide. Did she honestly think that I snuck out last night to have sex with a boy?

She was crazy!

" Mom, I did not have sex with him last night!" I exclaimed in a whisper.

" Okay, fine, fine. Then what did you do?"

" We kissed, a little bit. But nothing went that far...He's actually taking me out on a date tonight."

" A date! Oh, my little girl is growing up going on her first date! What are you wearing? We should go shopping!"

" Mom, I-"

" Come on, Isabella! I'm leaving later tonight, can't we just go to Port Angeles. Get you a pretty top, maybe some shoes. Please, sweetheart?"

I sighed, " Okay, fine."

" Oh, this is so great! Come on, we can take your truck!"

" Fine, but I'm driving."

I have no idea how I suddenly got roped into shopping with my mom. When it comes to her and shopping, there is no doubt that she won't go crazy and make me try on the contents of an entire store. When we got back in the house, Renee fled upstairs and left me in the kitchen with my father. Sue, Phil and the rest of the kids were in the living room talking and watching TV. I also noticed that the boys were eating breakfast on the floor.

My mom walked into the kitchen and skidded to a halt upon feeling the tense air. She put her hands on my shoulders and looked over at Charlie. I looked back at her just as she opened her mouth.

" Charlie. Our daughter is going out on a date tonight."

He didn't respond and I turned around to look at my mom.

" Let's just go."

" No. Charlie, why do you do this to her? She's an innocent girl and you act like our issues were her fault and treat her with such...disrespect and ignore her." Renee said in a hushed, angered voice.

" Renee, I'm done with this conversation." he said shortly.

" I have half a mind to take her with me to Florida so she can finish school."

Suddenly his head whipped around and he glared at her. I didn't understand.

Obviously I wasn't going to be going to Florida. I did want to finish high school here, especially with the fact that I will be taking summer school classes this summer and I hopefully will end up being able to graduate early this August.

And with Edward here...A big part of me wanted to stay. I didn't want to leave now.

But the look that Charlie had given my mother sent a chill running down my spine. Why would it matter so much if I left?

" You aren't taking her anywhere."

" Why would it make a difference, Charlie? The girl is already working her butt off in school and work so that she can leave here. She _wants _to graduate early in August to get out of here. Isn't that a big enough sign for you? Or do we need to tattoo it on your skin?"

" Can we please go?" I pleaded quietly with my mother. She rubbed my back and nodded.

My mom asked Phil if he would be alright here while we went out; of course, he got that sour expression, but he sucked it up and said it was fine. I almost felt bad, but my mother shoved my keys in my hand and shoved me out of the house before I could say anything.

I needed another cigarette.

Fuck, I needed a blunt.

When I got in the car, my mother plopped down in the seat and set her bag down next to her.

" I'm so sorry about him."

" It's okay...I'm used to it.

I pulled smoothly out of the driveway and weaved through the subdivision until I got onto the main road to head towards the highway. My mom cracked her window and I did the same.

We shared mindless chatter through the hour drive to the mall on Port Angeles, not really getting into any big conversation. She asked me about school, and in turn we talked about what was going on in Florida. Apparently my mother has been doing quilting. We all knew that eventually she would pass that off and find something else. My mom never was one to stick with things for a long time, but that's just part of who she is. The topic stayed off my father, and that was a good thing in itself. Talking about him pissed me the fuck off.

The drive went pretty quickly it seemed, and I pulled into the closest parking spot at the mall and we got out. It was misting slightly so we paced quickly to the doors. Once we were in the building she rolled her eyes.

" I can't stand this rain."

I smirked and put my hood down, then opened up the glass doors into the Macy's. We walked through the small place until we got to the actual mall, where all the shops were.

" Okay, now let's start. Are you thinking low cut?"

" Mom..."

" Just asking, just asking." she said, laughing quietly.

I rolled my eyes. " I don't want to look like I am trying hard."

" Okay, so is it just dinner tonight. Or are you seeing a movie also, what are the night plans."

" Uh...He just said dinner really. We might do something after but I don't think so."

She nodded and then we started looking through stores to find anything suitable. We started with American Eagle, skipped Aeropostale because they are too preppy for sure. Charlotte Russe had a lot of clothing, I have clothes from there. Their elegance in clothes held liking, but there wasn't really anything that had caught my eye that screamed perfect.

I didn't want to look too fancy, yet, nothing too casual and just easily picked. My mother made me try on a whole bunch of shirts, and most of the ones she forced me into just did not work for me. They were either too loose or my boobs were falling out. I think she was frustrated with it also. Sometimes my body shape didn't always cooperate with clothes. I had to be careful with tops.

We headed into Hollister to see if there was anything there, but most of those places are so conceited with all their logos with names plastered everywhere on the clothes, and I wasn't interested in that for this event.

Then we came up to a store called Trends. When we walked inside, I paused and looked around. It was a store that was full of designer clothes from all different people, from well known to just slightly known, but they also had non-designer clothes. I knew that all of the clothes were more expensive, and I looked at my mother.

" Mom...This is all like designer."

" Hey, I send you the stuff in the mail, so let me spoil you here. I have the money. So let's forget about price and just have fun, okay?"

I nodded and we started looking through the racks

Just as we were searching, and I was close to giving up I heard my mom skitter over to me.

" How do you feel about a dress?"

" I don't want to look like I'm trying hard..."

My mom held up a hanger, which had two pieces on it. The dress was really, really beautiful. It was spring and summery at the same time. It was a very light cream color and went mid thigh, and on the right flowed out just a small bit longer. The top was almost corset styled, but had a small printed design on it. Over it was an open burgundy/raspberry cardigan. It was a very beautifully put together outfit.

" You won't! It looks very first date appropriate and very sweet."

" Who's the dress made by?"

" Don't worry your pretty little head."

As we were heading to the checkout, my mom had disappeared off somewhere in the store. Just as I was lying the clothes in the counter, my mother came back holding a shoe box. She waved me off and scanned her debit, not letting me pay for anything despite my trying to interfere and do it myself. She didn't let me look at the price, and immediately when we were out of the store she sat me down on a bench and grabbed the bag.

" Come look." my mom said,

She took out the shoe box, and I saw they were in my size, of course. She took off the top, pulled the tissue back and revealed a pair of platform heels. They were the same exact color of the cardigan. The platform was about an inch, and the heel about three inches, all made of suede.

They were absolutely gorgeous, and perfect for the outfit.

" Oh my god, these are so cute." I said, grabbing them from her.

She laughed, " I knew that girly part was stuck in there somewhere."

Shoes have basically always been my favorite thing when it came to an outfit. I own a lot of flats, converse, heels, wedges, boots and I even have a few pairs of Nike's and Puma's in my closet somewhere. I leaned over and gave my mom a hug, thanking her for all of this.

Once we had left the mall, I had bought us lunch at Red Robin and we talked a bit more. Just as we had gotten out food, my mom looked at me and brought out the big guns.

" Should I ask Sue to take you to the doctor so you can get on birth control? I'm sure if I asked her she would be alright with it."

My eyes widened, " No!"

" Oh, baby, I know you'd probably want me there but..."

" Mom, I-"

" And I know you'd go alone when you are eighteen, but if you aren't planning on waiting to have sex with Edward then please let Sue take you. I know condoms are safe, but sometimes things happen when you're young."

" Oh my god..."

" I know how it is sometimes, Bella. Sometimes you want to get adventurous and-"

" Mom, please, please stop."

" Just promise me that you'll-"

" I'll be safe, okay? Can I promise that?"

" I would just feel more comfortable if you went on the pill, or even got a monthly shot. Sweetheart, I know you are a very responsible young woman but things can happen."

With a deep sigh I looked at my mom, " Look, mom...I still am a...fuck...I'm a virgin. And even if that happened with Edward I'm sure it will be later on in the relationship. And when I feel like that step in our relationship will be taken, I'll make sure that it's taken care of."

" Okay...But across the country or not, I am still here to look out for you."

" Thanks, mom."

It was moments like these where I felt so appreciative to have a mother like her. A little bit crazy, but she was somebody I could trust, and talk to without feeling awkward and weird about it. Not that I was going to be talking to her about anything physically, if it even goes there with Edward, but still. She never made me completely uncomfortable about it, which was something that I cherished to this day.

When we got back home, it was about four twenty. So I had just a little bit over two hours. I cleaned up my room a bit, dusted and vacuumed, which killed about twenty minutes. Then I organized my messy end table, dresser drawers and my shoes in my closet.

At four forty, I had to bid my mother a farewell, her and Phil were leaving to go back home. It was hard, as it always was, but I knew I'd see her soon. She wants me to come out to Florida for a week anyways and I was going to do that one of these days. I thanked her for my outfit for tonight and she told me I'd have to e-mail her sometime about the date.

Sue had taken them to the airport this time, and Leah had also gone with them. Jake and Seth were at their friend's house for a sleepover tonight, so it was just my father and I here.

At five I decided to get ready. The tags of my clothes were off, and I had steamed the cardigan a little.

I piled my hair up and did my makeup first, using a shimmery taupe color on my eyelid. I blended it up with a shimmery white up to my brow bone and lined my eyes with black eyeliner. I then finished my eyes by curling my lashes and putting on mascara.

I put on a fair powder just to even out all tones. My skin has always been nice, so it was blemish free. Afterwards I did my hair. I used my bigger barrel for curls and then sprayed it with a nice hair spray.

Once I was finished I slipped into my dress. It fit perfectly to my bust and waist until it flowed out just a bit. I slipped on the cardigan, leaving it unbuttoned, of course, and pushed the sleeves up to just below my elbow like my mom said. It had a bit of a loose fit, which made the outfit seem not as dressed up and overdone, just the perfect amount of dressy that it could pass off as casual. I grabbed my key necklace from my jewelry case and clasped it on.

I used my silver bead studded clutch and put on a little bit of body spray so I wouldn't smell like new clothes.

Once I was good; I looked in the mirror and smiled. Just as I did, my phone went off.

" Hello," I answered lightly.

" Hey, I should be there in about ten minutes. Is that okay?"

" That's perfect, I'll see you then."

" Okay. See you soon."

" You, too, Edward. Bye."

" Bye."

I put my phone and some money in my clutch, along with the house key just in case. It all fit perfectly into the clutch so I headed downstairs. I saw my father in the living room and then I decided to freak out. Obviously Edward was coming to the door and he was going to meet my father. I cursed under my breath and tried not to panic. I didn't want my father to say anything awful to him though, or to sit and ignore him. That would make me feel awful. I hadn't though it through/

I looked down at my outfit and smoothed everything out, feeling confident that I looked nice.

My nerves got the best of me, and when the doorbell ran I almost had a heart attack. Taking me by surprise, my father stood up from the couch and looked over at me.

I opened the front door, and saw Edward standing there holding a bouquet of white violets, and looking absolutely great. Well, he always looks great. He was wearing a pair of fitted dark wash jeans, a pair of nice green and white Nike's, a fitted white v-neck shirt and his leather jacket.

Wow.

His eyes gave me a slow look over and he smiled, " You look absolutely beautiful."

Edward stepped forward and handed me the flowers, " These are for you."

I smelled them and smiled, looking up at him. " Thank you." I murmured.

He walked through the front door with no hesitance, but he looked slightly nervous.

" I should find a vase for these." I stated, walking towards the kitchen and giving him to okay to follow.

Behind me I heard my father's heavy footsteps as he followed. I was absolutely shocked that he was even getting up to do anything. When I turned around Charlie stood in the doorway.

" Chief Swan, it's very nice to meet you. I'm Edward Masen." Edward said politely as I dusted off a vase that was underneath the kitchen sink cabinet. I rinsed it out, watching their exchange closely as I filled the vase with water and set it on the counter.

" You're taking my daughter out tonight." It sounded like a statement, and somewhat of a question.

My dad's eyes looked at Edward's piercings, and I knew that he was not pleased in the least bit. I didn't fucking care if he didn't approve. I honestly wouldn't.

" Yes, sir. I am planning on taking her to a restaurant in Port Angeles."

I snipped the ends of the flowers and put them in the water. They fit perfectly, and I smiled as I looked at them.

" So, Edward...Why all of the piercings?"

I walked over near Edward and looked over at my dad. He wasn't looking at me once, but the way he looked at Edward made me feel protective.

" Can we not get into that?" I said through my teeth.

" Well, Chief Swan, they are something that I've just obtained over the years."

My father quirked an eyebrow.

" We should get going." I stated.

" I'll take good care of your daughter, sir. Have a good night."

I didn't think my father even cared about the fact that Edward said he'd take care of me. He was already walking away by the time I told Edward that we should get going.

Before we left, I put my flowers upstairs in my bedroom and then headed downstairs with Edward. He opened the front door and let me walk out first. Once the door was shut behind us I felt his hand grasp mine.

" You look absolutely breath-taking." he whispered, sending a shiver over my spine.

Edward opened the passenger door for me, and shut it before getting into the drivers spot. The drive to Port Angles was a little long, so we would have a lot of time to spend together before that.

I was going to learn about Edward Masen

Starting with that girl in one of his Facebook pictures.

**Authors Note- I promise that next chapter will be updated on Friday at a normal time.**

**Links for Bella's outfit are in my profile. So check that out!**

**Send me a review!**


	9. Today Was A Fairytale

**Authors Note-Here it is! First date! **

**Disclaimer- S. Meyer owns all things Twilight.**

**Chapter Song- Today Was A Fairytale by: Taylor Swift.**

~\\~

BPOV

~\\~

Since it wasn't too cold outside, but there was still a lingering chill, Edward kept the heat in the car on low. It was comfortable, and not too warm. One of his hands rested on the wheel, and the other on the gear shift. I rested my hands in my lap and twisted my fingers together. I wondered why I was suddenly so nervous.

I spent the most amazing night with this guy last night; in a beautiful meadow, and he kissed me. And now I was nervous? I mentally rolled my eyes at myself.

When I glanced over at him, I saw him looking at me out of the corner of my eye.

" I'm really sorry about my dad..."

" It's okay, Bella. Let's talk about something else."

I nodded.

" Do you miss Chicago?" I asked him.

" Not really, I needed to get out of there...But I miss my dad. Every Friday he'd take me out to dinner, and we would go back to his house and just...hang out. I mean, yeah, he let me have a beer with him and we'd play video games, but I loved it."

" Yeah, it does kind of suck. When my mom is here, everything is so much...easier. She sticks up for me."

Edward's hand moved from the gear shift to grasp my hand. His fingers threaded through mine and he rested our linked hands next to my leg.

" I guess we all can't be that lucky."

I looked over at him, wondering what he exactly meant by that.

" My mom is great, she's been my rock through so much emotional shit I've gone through, and medical issues. And my dad has been just as amazing about it. It kind of sucks that you know, you have your mom, but your dad is kind of...strict."

" Well, he's Chief Police here, and his parents grew him up with completely traditional views. Even though they had me when my mom was only, like, eighteen."

Edward nodded, " It was the same with my mom, she was seventeen when she got pregnant with me. Her parents kicked her out, and she married my father when they were eighteen. They had to support me and having their own apartment so quickly, and both of them stuck together...I guess when I was younger I figured that since they were there through everything and made it out, that they wouldn't ever end up divorced. I guess I was totally wrong."

" Yeah, I never saw it coming with my parents... I just went home one evening and they sat me down."

" Definitely not the best time of your life was it?" Edward asked, chuckling quietly.

" No... So, anyways..."

" Bella, have you ever been out on a date before?"

Uh...

" No." I mumbled.

" Hm?"

" I said no, I have never been out on a date." I said confidently.

He smiled, " So I am your first then?"

" First for a date, yes." I confirmed.

" So, I'm not a first for other things?" he asked curiously.

I smiled, " You certainly weren't my first kiss."

" Who was?"

" Uh...That would be...Luke Shuyler. It was freshmen year, and I made out with him at his locker because Rosalie Hale liked him, and I wanted to piss her off after the stunt she pulled."

" Why do you both hate each other so much?" Edward asked.

I looked down, " I don't think you want to know."

" Why wouldn't I?"

" Because I don't want you to hate her, or go to your brother and tell him and make them break up. Then she will hate me even more and make me miserable until I graduate; not that she isn't already planning on it."

" Tell me."

" It was just the beginning of Freshmen year, and apparently she was 'getting back' at me for something. Which really I have no idea about, this was before I even made out with that guy...But, uh, you know Tanya Denali right?"

Edward nodded, " Yeah, I know her."

" Well, I was in the girls bathroom and they cornered me. Tanya was holding me down and Rosalie pulled a knife on me wrist, threatening to cut my wrist and make it look like I had been cutting myself. They had this delusional thought that then I would be shipped off to a mental institution, 'where I belong'. But I got away from them; they actually got suspended for doing it."

His eyes were as wide as saucers, " They did that to you?"

" Yeah, but it was awhile ago, I got over it. Rosalie just doesn't know when to fucking stop."

" You know, her and Emmett met on an online chat room? When we were moving, Emmett was over the moon. We all teased him about her being some eighty year old pedophile, that is until Alice and I stole his phone and saw all these naked pictures of some blonde girl on his phone. By the way, her boobs are totally fake."

I laughed, " Yeah, we all know she got them done the summer before sophomore year. It was so obvious, I mean, no girl comes to school on the last day being like a 30A, and comes back with at least a D, I mean, seriously?

Edward chuckled, " I know...She plays nice girlfriend for Carlisle and my mother, but otherwise she is a complete and utter bitch."

" I can only imagine."

" But I'm glad that I now have a valid reason to hate her."

" What?"

" I don't like at all what she almost did to you. That is absolutely, downright, completely awful. Especially with all the home issues I bet you had going on at that time."

" Yeah... So, anymore questions?"

" Are you still a virgin." he asked bluntly.

I blushed. " Uh...yeah. I am."

" Don't be embarrassed about it."

" What about you?"

" Me? No, I actually am not."

Should've seen that coming.

" Oh..."

" It was to my girlfriend...We'd been dating since we were like fourteen, and when I was sixteen, just after...Well...yeah. But she dumped me after my seventeenth Birthday." 

" Do you mind if I ask why."

" Well, Makenna, that's her name, didn't want to stick around after I was diagnosed with the Marfans the fall before we broke up. Once I found out I had it, I got really depressed and it was just a really down time in my life. She told me that she couldn't deal with me anymore, and just...left."

" Edward, I'm sorry." I whispered.

" Don't apologize, she just wasn't all she was cracked up to be. The time that things got hard she bailed, and I don't want to waste my time on a girl like that anyways. A week later I found out she was fucking my best friend, Matt. I haven't dated since then."

I looked over at him, " Look, if our...relationship...goes into something boyfriend/girlfriend-ish, I wouldn't ever be so heartless as to do that to you. I wouldn't ever do that to _anyone_. And I know we haven't known each other for that long, but I hope you know how much I truly mean that. What she did was awful, and she apparently has no idea what the hell she is missing."

Edward squeezed my hand, " Thank you, Bella."

" Just thought you should know how fucking awesome you are."

He rolled his eyes and lifted our hands, placing a kiss on the top of my hand. I almost melted into my fucking seat.

" She didn't know what she was doing anyways." Edward commented.

It took me a moment to realize what he meant, until I got it. Edward watched me as I broke out in a quiet laugh.

" Oh, yeah?"

" Mhm. Ever have an official boyfriend?"

" Not really...I'll admit, when I was like fourteen, after I got into James' crowd, I started partying a bit, made out with a lot of guys and did things I'm not proud of, but I never went as far to sleep with them. I used to...I used to leave the house wearing jeans, and I would push my dress up to my waist and put a big sweatshirt on. Then when I would get to James' house, I would do all my makeup, fix my dress, which was like pretty short anyways, broke out the four inch heels. As you've seen, I still go to parties like that. Usually my dad doesn't notice what I wear anymore. Once I saw he didn't give a fuck I went all out."

" Since we were on the subject of boobs, what size are you at? I'm going for C." he teased

" You are such a guy."

" You bet. Now tell me."

" Full C. Let's move on."

" Ever give a guy a-"

" Yes, and please don't ask questions."

He laughed, " Why not?"

" Let's just say it was not a great experience."

" Oooh, that doesn't sound good."

" Can we not talk about it?" I pleaded.

" Oh come on, this is perfect pre-date conversation."

" Usually people talk about their sexual experience many dates in, or before they are about to go for it. They don't talk about bra size's and previous sexual encounters!"

" Want to pull over and do it?"

" No!" I basically shouted at him.

He laughed loudly, " I was kidding, Bella."

I felt his hand tighten around mine, and I looked over at him.

" You're something else..."

Edward smiled, " So, what are your college plans?"

" I want to go into Journalism, and become a publisher. What about you?"

" I actually, uh, have applied to many music schools. I am hoping to get into Juilliard to become a professional piano teacher."

" Really? That sounds great."

" Yeah...Might have to pull some of these piercings out but...It's so worth it. I've wanted to do it my entire life, piano has always been my passion; music in general is my passion. I know that it's all the way in New York, but I just want to get a great education, and be fucking good at something."

I smiled, " That's really amazing, Edward."

" I've also applied to Chicago College of Performing Arts, Harrt College of Music, and Yale's School of Music. Other random places in Washington also, but not many. They are usually in Chicago, New York, Connecticut, Pennsylvania...I kind of just want to do my own thing, nothing holding me back."

Even though I knew that this was only my first date, I wondered what Edward's plan was if anything happened more between us. I wasn't going to be some passing trend, and I am sure he knows that. I wasn't going to be led on.

Soon we were in Port Angeles, and Edward was driving around the area like he knew it perfectly. Just as he was pulling into the parking lot of a very nice looking restaurant, he looked over at me.

" Don't think I am being too cheesy by bringing you here." he said as he parked the car.

" Why would I think that?"

Edward opened the car door for me, holding my hand the entire way towards the building. When I looked up to see where we are, I knew why Edward would say something about it. Personally, I thought it was funny and even a little bit cute that he picked it. Usually I would have made a jab at it, but he was being sweet.

_La Bella Italia_

" I hope you like Italian food."

" I happen to love it." I replied.

When we walked inside, we were immediately greeted by the hostess. Her eyes went immediately to Edward and she licked her lips. I fought the urge to reach over and hit her. Barely acknowledging my presence, she grabbed menus after Edward gave his last name. I saw her look over her shoulder as we walked to our table, which was in a secluded booth near a corner. The atmosphere was darker, but had elegant little lights hanging above the middle of each table.

Edward and I took our seat, she handed us the menu, blabbed off the specials, and then went on to tell us that our waitress would be here soon. With a wink in Edward's direction, she walked off, swaying her hips ridiculously from side-to-side. Edward paid absolutely no attention to her; instead I could feel him staring at me until I met his gaze.

As he was about to say something, our perky blonde waitress made an appearance.

" So, what can I get you to drink?" she asked flirtatiously, batting her eye lashes and leaning forward, giving Edward a good shot of her cleavage.

Edward moved towards the wall end of the booth.

" Bella, what would you like?" He asked me.

" A coke, please." I ground out.

" Make that two." Edward finished.

She stood up straight and walked away, winking at him.

What. The. Fuck.

I was, honestly, pissed off at all of the girls who were attracted to Edward. His dazzling capabilities were enough to catch the eyes of girls from all around, and from the looks of it; he had no idea how he was affecting any of these girls.

Well over half of them were probably wondering what the hell he was doing out with a girl like me. I was a lucky bitch, and I could say that with all the truth in the world. Out of all the more beautiful girls in Forks, he somehow wanted me.

Breaking me out of my trance, I felt Edward's hand rest over mine over the table. I hadn't realized that I had basically been staring into space and not been paying attention to him. When I looked over at him, he smiled slightly.

" Everything okay?"

" Everything is perfect." I replied.

He nodded once and moved his hand to look at the menu. I did the same and started scanning my eyes over the menu. Everything sounded really good to me, and as soon as the waitress came back with our drinks, Edward looked over at me, asking if I was ready to order. I answered with a nod and he told me I could go first.

" The, um, Tortellini al Pesto."

She nodded unenthusiastically, and looked over at Edward, putting on the whole flirty look for him. I rolled my eyes.

" Eggplant Parmigiana." He flashed his gleaming smile at her

She returned an awkward toothy smile and scribbled down his order. Dazed, she walked away from the table with the same smile on her face as before.

" You really shouldn't do that to people."

" Do what?"

" Dazzle people like that."

He seemed genuinely confused.

" You honestly don't know the effect you have on people?"

He ignored my question. " Do I dazzle you?"

" Frequently." I admitted, fighting back a blush

Edward smiled at me, " I really wish I could kiss you right now."

I found myself smiling as I pressed my teeth down on the corner of my mouth.

" So, music. What do you like?"

" ADTR, Chiodos, Muse...Stuff like that. You?"

" Good taste...Emarosa, Rise Against, Devil Wears Prada...City and Colour a bit, D.R.U.G.S. Shit like that."

I nodded, " City and Colour is great."

" You know Dallas Green?"

" Yeah, stumbled across him online actually one night. Really good stuff."

Our conversation seemed to flow easily, from music to movies, and Edward was just really easy to talk to. We talked over our meal, never stopping the never-ending stream of conversation. We talked about childhood memories, laughed over stupid things that happened, and favorite clips in movies.

I loved it. I was so fucking happy I couldn't contain myself. When I laughed, it felt genuine, and I hadn't felt like I could be like that again. Edward brought out a part of me that I missed and thought was gone. The tough bad-ass girl exterior seemed to falter with him around.

I found myself not wanting to leave ever, or even attempt to end the conversation. The waitress seemed to get the idea that this was a date, so she stopped with the flirty glances when she refilled drinks and took plates away.

Edward and I talked a bit about our first experiences with marijuana, which was pretty fucking hilarious. Apparently I hadn't been the only one who was uncontrollably laughing, and falling over myself when I walked, ending up falling asleep face down on the floor.

" You know that night you slept over at James', and I took over the couch we slept on?"

I smiled, " Yeah."

" You really didn't look like you needed a hug; I just wanted to be close to you."

" Oh, really? I completely didn't get that." I stated sarcastically.

" Probably. I was desperate. The morning at the diner just topped it off."

" Topped what off?"

" The fact that I wanted you to be mine."

I blushed, " Oh, yeah?"

He smiled, " Yes...Now, shall we leave."

I honestly didn't want the night to end. Edward paid the bill and I thanked him as we headed out. His arm wound around my waist as he walked to the car, and he opened the door for me once again like before. I hopped in and he shut the door and got in himself.

" Where are we going?"

" Well...I was thinking we could go over to my house and maybe watch a movie. I looked at show times, and since it's late, they have Face Punch show times, and Love Spelled Backwards is Love show times for after nine. So?"

" Let's just go to your house...Popcorn is free there anyways." I said, laughing quietly

Edward smiled, " Of course. Have you ever had marshmallow popcorn before, Bella?"

~\\~

" I honestly do not think that I can ever eat regular popcorn again."

Edward laughed loudly as he put the rest of the marshmallow popcorn in the bowl.

" Want a soda or something?" Edward asked.

" Uhm, sure. Whatever you're having is fine."

" Sure thing."

He reached into the fridge and told me where the glasses were. And they were all tall glass ones. I carefully grabbed two and set them down. Edward filled them with ice and poured what looked like homemade raspberry lemonade in each glass. I tried to distract him as he poured, dancing my fingers along his neck and waist. He laughed and playfully shoved my hands away, once the glass pitcher of the drink was back in the fridge, he trapped me between him and the counter top.

" Hey, Edward. I heard the garage door, how was your da-" Alice rushed out, pausing when she saw me standing there.

Edward moved his arms away from me and I smiled wryly at Alice.

" Still on that date?" Alice asked.

" Mm, kinda."

Alice smirked and walked into the kitchen, sliding past me to grab a Sunkist from the fridge. I grabbed the popcorn from the counter. Edward said that he didn't want me to trip with the soda just in case, I glared at him. But I had also been holding my clutch, so he won anyways.

" I'm close to your bedroom, Edward. If I hear any noises I'm going to start banging on your door!" Alice shouted.

Edward rolled his eyes and headed up the stairs. I followed after him down all the hallways and past all the doors. Just as we passed the last door at the hallway before the three stairs, all the way to the left another door opened, and Carlisle Cullen walked out of the room there.

" Edward, you have company?" Carlisle said.

He was wearing a pair of long sleep pants and a t-shirt. It was weird seeing him not in his doctor clothes, but I guess he was just a normal person, too. Edward looked over at him upon hearing his voice and stopped walking.

" Yes. Carlisle, this is Isabella Swan, or Bella. Bella this is Carlisle, my step-father."

" Yes, we've met before. But it's very nice to meet you formally."

" You also. I hope you don't mind me being here kind of late."

He smiled warmly. " Of course not. A friend of Edward's is always welcome. Enjoy your night."

Friend? Well, I guess Edward and I hadn't really made anything official yet.

Edward and I got to his bedroom and he told me to shut his bedroom door behind me. I set the popcorn at the end of his bed, and he put the drinks on his end table. He looked around his shelves at his movies.

" What do you want to watch?"

" I'm pretty much into anything."

" So, Busty Cops 3 sound good?"

I glared at him, " Really?"

He laughed, " No. But what would you like to watch?"

" Anything but busty cops anything."

Edward grabbed a movie from the shelf and held it up to me. Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest.

" You are my soul mate." I proclaimed. " Put it on."

He smiled and headed over to his television as I set my clutch on his white lounger chair/couch.

He changed the input and put the disk in his DVD player and grabbed the remote. I turned off his bedroom light and Edward sat on the bed, sitting on the right side. He patted the spot next to him and I sat a few inches away from him, adjusting my dress to not flash anything.

Edward looked at my shoes and then back at me. " Those shoes are sexy as hell, but take them off."

I rolled my eyes at him and slipped them off, placing them at the side of his bed.

The popcorn was between us, and we ate as we watched. He passed me my drink, and I chugged it fairly quickly and Edward set it down for me, letting me take sips of his. We didn't talk really, just sat in comforting silence as we watched the action of the movie.

The popcorn went quick, and when the bowl sat on the end table, we slowly started to gravitate towards eachother.

It was kind of hard to pay attention to the movie, no matter how good it was, with this man sitting next to me. I couldn't help but glance at him to almost make sure this was real. Edward watched the movie seemingly intently, until both of us slowly started to move closer, inch by inch until at one point our hips were touching. It was at the part of Will Turner battling on the water wheel.

Slowly Edward's arm wrapped around my waist, and I leaned into him, resting my head on his shoulder. His hand moved up and down my arm in a slow motion, it was soothing and slowly making me fall asleep. I still tried to watch the movie, but he was making it awfully hard. His room was warm and I started to sweat just slightly, and I decided to be courageous and shrugged off my cardigan, leaving me in the dress.

I've of course seen the movie before, and even though how many times I enjoyed watching it, my eyes were starting to close. Edward knew it, because he could tell that his touch was doing that to me. I'd never actually been able to fall asleep too early, but he was some kind of sleeping magician. When his hand moved to my outer thigh, he stroked my soft skin and I got lost in his touch even more.

Before I knew anything I drifted off in Edward's arms, still feeling his hand moving up and down my leg.

~\\~

I awoke hearing the Pirates of The Caribbean theme song playing from the television. Outside was completely pitch black, as was the bedroom besides the television illuminating the room a little. The volume wasn't too loud; it actually was lower than it had been before.

I felt Edward underneath me, his chest slowly rising and falling with slow breaths. He looked peaceful and comfortable with his arm around my waist. I smiled and rested my fingers on his jaw.

When I realized I should probably check the time, I slowly pealed myself away from Edward and grabbed my clutch that I had just thrown on his lounger, next to my cardigan. I grabbed my phone and checked the time, seeing that it was eleven thirteen.

I knew it wouldn't be a big deal to stay later, but I didn't want to be here for too long. It was only our first date.

Before waking Edward, I put my phone down on the end table and went to the bathroom that was connected to his room, relieving my bladder. Once I had washed my hands and stepped out of his bathroom, I went into his bedroom. Edward was still lying down in bed, fast asleep. I turned off the television and slowly got back up on the bed.

Edward woke up as I sat next to where he lay.

" Hey...Sorry for falling asleep." he said, his voice rough with sleep.

" It's okay." I murmured, resting my hand on his chest.

Taking me by surprise, Edward pulled me down next to him and wrapped his arm around me. I wanted to be here forever. I ignored my minds chatter and went with my heart instead, curling up next to Edward.

" Do you have to go?"

" Not right away."

" Think we can take another nap before I have to give you back?"

" Yeah."

We didn't end up falling asleep again, but we laid down and cuddled for awhile, dozing off for short periods of time, but never falling asleep. Soon we had to get up so that I could get home.

I walked over to the side of his bed and grabbed my shoes to slip them on. I put my cardigan on and grabbed my clutch, making sure that I had my phone. There was a hair band laying at the bottom, so I grabbed it and tossed my hair up.

Edward grabbed his keys and slipped his phone into his pocket, slowly leading me out of his room. As we walked down the hall and down the three stairs to the main hall, Edward slipped his arm around me. I leaned into him and we walked down the stairs together before he released me to open the front door.

I attempted to go down the many stairs to the driveway, but I stumbled and Edward caught me many times, laughing every time. Once we got in the car he started it up and headed to my house.

I didn't want the night to end, it was too perfect and I didn't want to face the reality of my real life.

He drove swiftly through the empty streets of Forks, and once we were in my neighborhood, I almost found myself frowning. He had held my hand the entire way there, and I felt him squeeze my fingers every once in awhile.

The night had been perfect, and I hoped that we would have more of them.

Once we pulled up to my house, which was completely dark. Edward parked the car on the curb and got out, quickly going to my side before I could open the door myself.

He held my hand as we walked up the driveway and to my front door. We stopped on the porch and he turned to face me.

" I had a great night tonight. Thank you for dinner, and everything else."

" Anytime, we'll do it again." he murmured, running his hand over the side of my face.

I leaned into his touch, but all too soon he moved his hand away to put his finger under my chin. I looked up at him and he moved towards me. His arm wound around my waist, and I did the same with both my arms. Slowly he leaned down to kiss me, tangling his free hand in my hair.

Even though the kiss was closed mouth, it was still amazing. I teasingly flicked his lip rings with my tongue and he growled against my lips. I smiled and he leaned against the wall by the front door, pulling me along with him.

" Mm, I don't want to stop." he murmured.

" Me either."

He caught my lips with his again, parting his lips against mine. His breath was sweet and cold, and I felt his tongue run over my smooth lip. I moaned quietly against his lips and rested my hand on his cheek.

The kiss was utterly breathtaking, and I couldn't find it in me to grasp the reality that Edward was kissing me. All too soon he pulled away, breaking the kiss. His forehead rested against mine, and I moved my hands up and down each side of his body.

" I feel like maybe that should have been our first kiss."

" No. Unpredictable sounds just like us."

He smiled and ran his fingers through my hair.

" Thanks for tonight."

" Of course. Now I should go before I continue making out with you in the dark."

He chastely kissed me once before jogging down the porch steps and down the driveway, before making it halfway, he looked back at me, and I walked forward, leaning against the beam by the top porch step.

" Bella?"

" Yes, Edward?"

" You're mine right?"

The words sent my heart fluttering.

" Yeah. And your mine."

I grabbed my house key and opened up the door, smiling as I did. I heard Edward start up his car and drive away. I leaned against the front door, probably with the creepiest smile ever on my face. With a deep sigh I headed upstairs as quietly as I could.

I opened and shut my bedroom door behind me, tossing my clutch and cardigan on my bed.

I went through my before-bed routine of washing my face, brushing my teeth and changing my clothes. I took my phone out of my purse and saw I had a text message.

One from Jess, reminding me about hanging out tomorrow, and one from Edward he sent a few minutes ago.

_Hey, we're still hanging out tomorrow right?_

_PA mall? Text me back!_

_Love ya,_

_-Jess_

And then Edward.

_By some weird wicked way, I already miss you._

_But I hope you get some sleep tonight._

_What are you doing tomorrow?_

_Let me know._

_-E_

He already wanted to see me again tomorrow? My heart was sent into overdrive, but I took a deep breath and calmed down. I didn't want to tell him no, but I had plans with Jess, and I wasn't going to be the friend who ditches her others for her boyfriend; I wasn't like that.

_I'm actually hanging with my friend tomorrow,_

_Maybe on Wednesday? _

_I miss you, too_

_-B_

I set my phone down and crawled into bed, smiling as I went over the evenings events in my head, replaying everything; especially the kiss.

I fell asleep with the biggest smile on my face. For the first time in a long time I was happy, and it felt amazing.

**Authors Note-**

**Hey, guys. I hope you liked the first date!**

**Leave me a response on what you think! I reply to all reviews!**


	10. Falling In Love At A Coffee Shop

**Authors Note- Hey guys... This chapter is randomly long, so just go with it. I hope you all had a good week.**

**Disclaimer- S. Meyer owns everything Twilight.**

**Chapter Song- Falling In Love At A Coffee Shop by Landon Pigg**

~\\~

BPOV

~\\~

" Oh my god. You, Bella Swan, were kissed, or you got laid! You are so totally glowing!" Jess shouted.

" Shhh, keep it down!"

" Tell me everything!"

" I went out on a date with Edward last night."

" Edward _Masen_?"

I bit my lip and nodded as Jess squealed like a teenager at Britney Spears concert. I had no idea why she was so surprised, but I guess maybe I could in a way. Edward has only been here for just over a week, well, he'd been here longer, but that was when he started school. It was pretty insane, and I couldn't get over it myself.

Thinking about last night made goose bumps spread over my skin and I thought back to the kiss he'd given me. It was perfect. Almost too perfect.

" Oh my god! Why didn't you tell me?"

" I didn't want to say anything before something was even made out of it. I was of course going to tell you down the line...But last night was fucking awesome."

" Did you do it?"

" No! But damn did he kiss me when he dropped me off..." I sighed, trailing off.

" Oh, I bet it was dreamy...What'd you guys do?"

" Well, he picked me up and we went to this place in Port Angeles called _La Bella Italia. _When we finished with dinner we went back to his house to watch a movie, and ate marshmallow popcorn; which is fucking awesome by the way."

" Aw, that's sweet. Why didn't you guys go out to a movie or something. Need more privacy to make out?"

" There wasn't any good movies playing at the right times, smartass. And we didn't make out, but we fell asleep in his bed during the movie. It was just fantastic, everything was. He's...he's honestly great, Jess. I can't believe it sometimes.

" And so incredibly sexy! Do the lip rings get in the way? Oooh! the tongue ring?"

" They add to the fun." I teased, smiling.

" Aw, I'd be so jealous if I wasn't so happy for you!"

I rolled my eyes at her and grabbed my car keys from my table.

" Let's go, Stanley. We can talk more in the car."

" I like this new happy Bella Swan."

" I do, too."

Jess shut my bedroom door and followed down behind me. I felt her tug on my ponytail and I jogged down the stairs; I turned back and glared at her, and suddenly ran into a hard body. A _familiar _hard body. I looked up and saw Edward standing there, looking surprised that I had run into him.

" Hey, what're you doing here?" I asked, sounding breathless.

" Alice was making me drop her off, but I also wanted to ask you something."

We made a move to step outside, and I saw Jess wink at me as she followed not so closely behind us. Edward and I walked down towards his car which was parked on the curb, and Jess waited by my car, leaning against it and staring at her phone. I was curious as to what Edward had to say to me, and kind of anxious to hear it.

The air was already getting warm and sticky, but it's almost May so it's not entirely too weird, but luckily it wasn't raining; at least not yet. I had on a pair of dark wash denim shorts, and a strapless dark orange shirt that clung to my chest and flowed out. I finished the outfit with black flip flops.

" Hey."

" Hi." I replied, smiling brightly at him.

" I was thinking tomorrow I could steal you for lunch?" he asked.

" Uhm, yeah, that'd be great. Where should I meet you?"

" I'll pick you up, okay? Be ready at around eleven."

" Okay, I'll see you then."

" Alright, enjoy your day."

" You, too."

Before I walked away, Edward grasped my hand and used his other free hand to tip my face up. He kissed me softly, no hesitance in the movement of his lips on mine. I grasped the short hair on his neck and tried to deepen the kiss, but he pulled away from me before I could.

" I'll see you tomorrow." he murmured, kissing the side of my mouth over my lip ring.

I stumbled back and he caught me, chuckling quietly and holding me against him.

" My clumsy girl." he murmured in my ear.

" I have to go." I told him regretfully, pulling away from him.

He nodded and brushed his hand through my hair, leaving me dizzy and in a haze all over again. Edward turned and headed away as I walked towards my car, unlocking the door on the drivers spot.

" Bye, Edward!" Jess shouted, smirking. I glared at her and shut the door

Edward gave a small wave in response to her and got into his car. Jess quickly got into the car on the other side and squealed so fucking loud it hurt my ears. I leaned back and groaned, waiting for the oncoming girly talk she was going to give me.

" Oh. My. God. You guys are so damn cute together! What did he tell you?"

" He wants to take me out to lunch tomorrow." I stated nonchalantly, when I was really just about dancing and squealing inside like Jess was just hearing about the news.

" Where?"

For a minute, I thought, but he never even told me where we were going. He seemed to be one for surprise, and while I honestly was never big on surprises, especially as a kid, I was really excited for it.

" He didn't say." I replied.

" We are buying you something cute! Let's go!"

~\\~

I didn't end up buying an entire outfit; I honestly didn't feel the need when I had an entire closet filled with tops, but I did find a pair of, what I consider cool but what Jess considers stupid, skinny jeans that are ripped up pretty wickedly. I was thinking I could wear a pair of sheer colored tights with them. I thought they were fucking bitchin', but apparently Jess has no taste. They were pretty dark wash, almost black, but not quite.

She went insane going into Forever 21 and bought a whole bunch of things that were on sale, ending up with about five tops and a pair of acid wash shorts and a white and black patterned skirt. Jess had always been a little girlier, while Angela was a bit earthier, and I was kind of rocker sheik.

I bought a bandeau top for a bright green and grey striped tank top I bought a short while ago. It came down a little low on the sides and I liked the bandeau top for it.

We stopped in at Victoria's Secret, of course. Every time I've ever really gone to the mall with Jess and Angela, we always end up in there. Angela not as often, but she's a bit more modest then Jess, who is completely fucking out there. I got a new dark purple lace bra and panty set, and the bra could go strapless. Jess flew through so much I could barely keep up with her, but her bag was bigger than mine.

We stopped out and had lunch at a cafe, getting sandwiches and salad at just a small place. We'd been here a few times before when we came out this way.

" So, I totally saw that kiss."

I rolled my eyes and took a bite of my salad, chewing and swallowing before I even answered her comment.

" Yeah, I bet."

" Aw, don't be embarrassed."

" I'm not! You know that I have absolutely no fucking shame when it comes to everything."

I took a sip of my strawberry lemonade and leaned back.

" Do you think it's going to last?" Jess asked.

I looked over at her, " I like him...Like, a lot more than I have any other guy. I mean, sure I've had my fair share of making out and fooling around with guys, but Edward just feels different. Something about him just isn't like those other horny teenage boys running around Forks High."

" Have you guys made it official?"

" Last night he asked me if I was 'his', and I told him yes. Does that mean official?"

Jess turned her head to the side. " I guess, but you should talk to him about it tomorrow. I mean, obviously I know you like him, but be careful. School ends this May, and he graduates. If he goes off to college or something, what's going to happen then?"

She gave me a lot to think about.

What _would _happen when he went off to college, assuming he would go? I still have a year of school left to finish up, and I'm not even eighteen yet. I was definitely hoping that I was going to be able to graduate early. That would mean maybe a few summer school courses, but I wanted to do it. This plan was even before Edward.

Did I really want to get into something that could end up a mess?

What if he realizes he doesn't want some seventeen year old girl, and he wants some blonde equally as beautiful as him that's in college. Someone who he'd probably be able to see more often than he could ever see me if he did go to college.

" Hey, I'm not trying to bring you down. I just totally do not want to see you crushed, Bella; you're my best friend and you wouldn't deserve that."

I nodded. " Yeah, I know."

" But let's not think about it, because if it does work out and he cares about you, it will all work out!"

" You're right."

We finished up eating our salad and sandwiches and headed back out to the truck.

I was plagued with many thoughts on the subject of futures.

Edward and I have been on one date. We haven't even kissed more than like four times. I needed to ask him what our relationship was, because I don't want to end up in a mess and confused as to what we are to each other.

I fell so hard for him I nearly crashed through the ground, and the feeling scared me. I didn't want him to leave. And I was stunned for how strong that feeling was. I couldn't grasp it. In just a few short days he meant more to me than a lot of other things.

I was utterly terrified of that.

~\\~

Jess stayed over that night. We dropped by her house and grabbed a bag of over night stuff and headed over to my house. We got there around six, and dinner was already on the table. Alice and Leah were talking in their own little world, and Jess and I just grabbed a few potato wedges that Sue made and headed upstairs.

With her bag tossed on the floor, Jess plopped down on my bed with the plate of potatoes on her stomach.

" I wish my mom could cook half as good as Sue."

I rolled my eyes, " I bet."

" Hey, you were over that night she made what she calls 'meat loaf' and 'mashed potatoes'. I know you were grimacing through the entire meal."

" Okay, yeah, but she made awesome double chocolate brownies."

" For sure." Jess agreed. " But they were out of a box."

We hung around my bedroom, talked, and did our nails. Typical girl things. Angela called me to talk about her date with Ben on Sunday, but I hadn't told her about my date with Edward. I figured maybe she could find out when we got back to school. I didn't want to be sitting on the phone gossiping about it.

Realizing that I had a shift tomorrow, I called in and asked for someone to cover for me. It was the first time ever that I had actually called in for someone to cover, and Charlotte was totally cool about it. I knew that I wasn't going to make a habit of it.

At around one Jess and I got some sleep. We shared my bed, like always, and slept on opposite sides. That's when the relentless teasing about Edward started.

" You talk in your sleep, and I swear to god if I hear one ' Oh god! Edward!' I am going to kill you."

" I wouldn't do that!"

" I bet you would Miss. He's so hot and sexy. And 'we cuddled it was so awesome'."

" Shut up!"

Jess giggled, " No way. You finally like a guy and I am going to tease you about it whenever I want."

I rolled over and sighed. Jess shifted on the opposite of the bed before laying still.

" I'm really happy to see you happy for once, Bella. You deserve it."

" Thanks, Jess."

Jess was like a sister to me, it didn't matter how much she teased me because it was harmless. She quickly fell asleep, breathing quietly next to me.

I fell asleep with a smile on my face, thinking of Edward; as always.

~\\~

" Bella, time to wake up sleeping beauty."

I groaned and rolled over, ignoring her. Her hand suddenly poked the back of my neck and I sat up and cringed, mumbling a small 'ow' under my breath. She knew that it would get me up in an instant.

" Well, it's nine thirty right now. I figure you could get me home by at least ten thirty. Then you can just chill for a bit before going out."

" Yeah, yeah. Ten more minutes." I groaned, laying back down in bed.

" Okay, lazy bones. I'm going to shower real quick, that okay?"

" Sure, don't use all my damn shampoo though."

She laughed, " Of course not, princess."

I rolled my eyes and laid back down, closing my eyes slowly. I stretched out and sighed, feeling myself slowly start to fall back asleep.

It felt like five minutes later, but Jess woke me up and was already dressed, hair and makeup done and ready for the day. She started the shower for me and basically shoved me in. It woke me up pretty well, and I cleaned up quickly.

Something inside of me felt different though. When I shaved my legs, I wanted to make sure that every single hair was gone, and when I washed my hair I scrubbed it twice as good. I scrubbed my body twice, and gave the conditioner time to silken my hair.

I wanted to genuinely look nice.

And not just for myself.

Because of Edward.

I did my hair in the bathroom, using a thicker barrel for bigger curls, and used a brown, and light tan eyeshadow for today, with thin liner. I finished my eyes off with a touch of mascara, and used an overall powder for my face. I used a very light pink NARS gloss for my lips. Last night I already had my outfit set out, so I knew what I was wearing.

I put on the light ivory strapless bra and panty set, and Jess tossed my skirt at me. It's a ruffled light, but still slightly dark, tan colored skirt. I tucked in a white tissue tank top that has a little bit of a print on the front and I finished it off with a leather, two strap belt that's a dark burnt orange. It was secured where I tucked the shirt inside, so it wasn't showing.

" Hey, where are my suede Louboutin's that match the skirt?" I asked, riffling through my closet.

Jess literally reached forward and pulled them out of my pile immediately, smiling.

" Perfect!"

I slipped the shoes on and Jess grabbed my six brass plated bangles that are an orange that match my belt. I grabbed my bronze clutch and tossed it on my bed. Jess insisted on body spray, and I went with it and used my usual raspberry one.

" You look awesome!"

I checked myself in the mirror and smiled. It was put together well, and I hoped Edward liked it.

We headed downstairs after I put everything I needed in my clutch.

" Where are you going?" Leah asked,

" Edward and I are having lunch this afternoon." I stated, sitting at the table.

Alice smirked, " You're going to love it."

My gaze snapped to hers, " You know?"

" Yes, I do. He's been walking around the house smiling for no reason for the past few days. I think it's the first time he's ever been like giddy happy."

I smiled and looked away, staring out the window. Jess chewed on bacon, munching and smiling.

" So, you still say you guys haven't had sex...But why is Edward Masen _giddy_?" Jess asked suggestively.

Alice and Leah's jaws dropped down to the table.

" Oh my god, Jess. For starters, there are little sixteen year olds at the table. And for another thing, whatever I do with Edward; is my business."

" You totally gave him a-"

" Shut up, Jess. Stop making assumptions." I stated, ending the conversation before it went any further.

She glared at me and Leah picked her jaw up from the table. Alice was sending me sideways smirks every few minutes.

At ten forty, Jess and I headed to her house to drop her off. She hugged me and thanked me for letting her crash at my house, and for yesterday. Agreeing to do it again soon, and promising to see each other at school, Jess headed into her house.

When I got back home it was only five minutes to eleven. I had stopped at Target to pick up a few things and immediately went home. James called me about hanging out tonight. I wasn't exactly sure because of Edward, but I told him maybe before just shooting him down.

Since it was nice outside, I waited for Edward. I smoked a quick cigarette and popped a few mints in my mouth. I was excited to see him again, even though I saw him yesterday, and the day before that, and technically, also the day before. He was just addicting in a way I couldn't ever explain or find words to express it.

As per usual, the familiar Volvo pulled up to the curb.

Instead of being the regular everyday jackass and honking the horn like any other guy would, he got out of the car to walk towards me. I met him halfway and he was looking up and down my body.

" You look beautiful today."

" You look great, too."

He smiled and took my hand, leading me to the car. Edward opened up the passenger seat door, and I sat down. He didn't close the door, and I turned towards him, sitting sideways in the seat. Edward moved my legs apart and stood between them. My skirt rode up slightly and I felt his hand moving up my thigh.

" This skirt is going to drive me insane." He breathed

I leaned forward and reached my arms out to wrap around his neck. Edward's lips crashed on mine and I fervently moved my lips against his, wanting more and more. His head tilted to the side to deepen the kiss and I felt his tongue against mine. Metal touched my tongue, tangled with it, and more metal pressed against my lips. I wouldn't have wanted it any other way. My body was lit on fire and I felt my lips tingle slightly.

" Ready to go?" he murmured against my lips.

" Mhm." I hummed, pulling away from him completely.

He kissed my cheek softly and I sat properly in the seat. Edward shut the door for me and got into the car himself, starting it up and hearing it purr quietly. He didn't say anything, all he did was take my hand and take off.

~\\~

We were at his house, and I looked over at him, wondering why he had kept the destination such a secret if it was here. Edward didn't even answer my questioning look. We got out of the car and Edward started taking me around the house.

I followed him to the back, through at least a half mile of the woods I heard water, and we came up to a stream. Water tumbling over rocks and spilling down over them. It was beautiful, and I had also noticed the red blanket laid down on the ground with a basket in the middle it.

" Wow."

" Do you like it?"

" It's perfect."

He sat down on the blanket and I did the same, being mindful of my skirt. Edward smiled at me and stretched his legs out, placing the basket next to him. He took out two cokes, which were in the fancy original glass bottles. I laughed quietly and picked one up.

" These are so fucking old."

" I know. I found them at the store, so I just figured it would be cool."

He took out neat containers; there were three of them, two of them bigger, one smaller.

" How do you feel about chicken, bacon and mozzarella together."

" I think that it sounds absolutely divine."

" Good."

Edward opened up a container, which inside had two sandwiches that were wrapped in plastic wrap. They were Panini's, and they looked amazing. Edward took them out and opened up the next two containers, one was an assorted fruit salad, and the other a regular romaine lettuce salad with feta, hardboiled egg, cucumber and onions, with Italian dressing.

" This looks amazing."

" Ah, this isn't all."

He took out another container and took off the lid.

" Mascarpone Mini Cupcake's, and a Strawberry Glaze."

My mouth watered.

Then he put the lid over the container and put it away. I pouted and he smiled at me, sliding a sandwich over to me.

" So, who made this? I know it's not you."

" Hm, good question."

I took a bite and almost moaned. Fuck. It was delicious.

" Keep moaning like that and I won't stop feeding you,"

I blushed and took my time chewing and swallowing the delicious sandwich. I basically devoured the entire thing, unable to put it down. I don't think I've ever even had one that good in my entire life. Edward also finished his off when I was done with mine and he smiled upon seeing the satisfaction on my face.

" That was phenomenal."

" My mother prepared all of this for me."

" Well, you have to thank her for doing all of this. It's honestly amazing, Edward."

" I'm glad you like it."

" It's not just that...You're just...amazing."

" Amazing?"

" Yeah, you are."

" Thanks." he said awkwardly.

I moved closer towards him and he watched me closely. When I leaned into his side, almost immediately his arm wrapped around my waist. He set the regular salad on his lap and handed me a fork.

" Mind sharing?"

" I sure do." I teased him, clanking his fork with mine.

We ate between the regular and fruit salad until it was basically gone, and I was full. I knew I still had some room for those mini cupcakes though, they looked absolutely divine and there were five in there.

As I took large gulps of the coke Edward took the container out, putting the empty ones back in the basket. He took out a mini cupcake, took off the paper cupcake wrapper and held it towards my mouth. I ate half of it in one bite and felt the gooey frosting on my upper lip. Before I could even finish the half, Edward playfully shoved the rest in my mouth. I chewed, swallowed and before I could even get to the strawberry icing on my upper lip, Edward sucked it into his mouth and moaned.

When he pulled away he licked his lips. " Good icing."

I hummed quietly at him.

With the basket pushed aside and the cupcakes not in the way, everything else ceased to exist. Edward's hand caressed my upper thigh, but he never took it further besides those touches. His lips against mine were soft, but also urgent at the same time. He tasted like the strawberry icing, and it was delicious.

I groaned against his lips when his other hand moved up my waist and along my curves, and I felt the hand on my thigh squeeze my flesh. A wave of lust and want suddenly crashed over me, overwhelming and overpowering. I ran my tongue over his bottom lip before taking it between my lips and flicking his lip rings with my tongue. Edward moaned deeply and he shifted himself above me, moving his hips away from mine.

His arm wrapped around my waist, his hand warm even through the material of my shirt. I felt like I was on a little euphoric cloud, floating about peacefully. I tangled my hand in his hair, tugging in the stands; which he seemed to enjoy thoroughly.

" We have to stop." Edward ground out, pulling away.

My chest heaved wildly, trying to get in as many breaths as I could. Edward sat up and ran his hands through his hair. I smoothed my skirt down and ran my own fingers through my hair.

" I got letters in the mail from college's I applied to."

I glanced up at him, surprised at his sudden outburst of words.

" I haven't looked at them yet." He said regretfully, looking at me with those piercing green eyes.

" Why not?"

" I'm not sure." he replied.

" You should open them." I encouraged, closing the cupcake container and putting it in the basket.

" Your hair is a mess." Edward said, chuckling quietly as he fixed it for me.

" Thanks to you."

" Most definitely,"

Once my hair was fixed, Edward just laid back down and I rested my head on his chest, feeling his fingers run through my hair, loosening up my curls. I put my hand on his stomach over his shirt, keeping it still for the most part.

The silence was also comforting, and lying in Edward's arms made me feel warm and secure, like nothing in the world could ever hurt me with him here. I hoped that it would always feel like this. Every once in awhile he would kiss the top of my head and squeeze me tighter.

" I care about you so much." he murmured.

" Yeah?"

" Yes."

" I care about you, too."

" I don't know what it is about you that makes you so alluring. You're charming in the cutest way."

I blushed, " Charming?"

" Very much so."

At around three thirty Edward and I got up and I folded the blanket for him. He insisted on carrying the blanket and the basket, so I didn't bother to argue with him. When we headed to his house, he walked in through the side door, leading me through a very organized garage. There was a silver M3 convertible parked, and also a sleek yellow Porsche, which apparently belonged to Alice for when she got her license this summer.

Edward opened up the door to the house, and we were in a laundry room, and passing into the kitchen. His mother Esme was there, and appeared to be starting dinner. When she saw me a big smile broke out on her face.

" Bella, it's so very nice to see you again!"

" Thank you, and also thanks so much for all of the food; all of it was absolutely divine."

" You're very welcome. I couldn't let that kid over there make it, unless you actually don't want to eat." she teased as Edward scowled at her.

I laughed and threaded my fingers through Edward's. Just then I heard a little click sound, and Esme looked over in the direction of the laundry room.

" That's another load finished. Excuse me."

She fled from the room, still wearing that radiant smile on her face.

" I like your mom." I told him, leaning against the counter.

He smiled, " Yeah, she is quite the character."

" Oh, don't like to be teased about your lack of culinary skills?"

" I can make it up by other talents." he said suggestively, resting his hands on my hips.

" Is that so?"

" Mhm." he hummed before pressing his lips softly to mine.

" Hey, Edward, who are you making out with?"

We parted quickly and suddenly I heard something between a gasp and a snort.

" Isabella Swan? Really, Edward? Couldn't do any better? I totally set you up with Tanya, you guys were perfect." Rosalie Hale stated with a laugh.

" Tanya Denali? She's a bitch and she's fake, Rosalie. No wonder you both get along so well." Edward sneered.

" As I've said before; Bella is the most butch girl in the fucking school. Surprising you even own a skirt, Swan."

" Rather be the most butch girl in school than a slut with fake boobs." I retorted.

Emmett just kind of stood there, almost like he expected it and didn't even really care how things were turning out. I wouldn't be surprised if he was sick of her attitude, too. Rosalie just stood there with a dumbfounded look on her face.

" Fake? Whoa, babe, you never told me that." Emmett commented.

Rosalie went red in the face and she glared hard at me. Edward was trying to hide his laughs behind his hand, and I just stared at her with a satisfied look on my face.

" And Bella doesn't really look butch, Rose, just saying'. I mean, if I didn't love you I'd tap that." Emmett finished off, giving me a grin.

Yeah, he was officially one of my hero's in that moment.

" Shut up, Emmett!" she yelled.

" You can't control people, Rosalie. Oh, and the red color on your face seems to match your personality; just get some horns to go with it next time."

Edward grabbed my hand and trailed me along with him. I brushed my shoulder past Rosalie's and followed Edward down to the foyer and upstairs. Once we were in the hallway he started laughing. I smiled and rolled my eyes at him.

" What is so funny?" I asked.

" You're fucking amazing." he stated, taking me by surprise and lifting me up in his arms. His hands held me up by my thighs and I put my arms around his neck.

" You're very strong."

" I think that you are about as light as a feather."

" Mhm, su-"

" What's going on out here?" I heard a familiar voice ask.

Leah.

With Alice next to her. They looked at us with curious eyes and I rested my hands on Edward's shoulders to distance us.

I tried to get off him but he wasn't having that. He only held me closer and tighter.

" Nothing. We'll see you ladies later."

With that Edward carried me off to his room, almost sprinting. I kept my arms around him, not wanting to fall to my death, and suddenly we were in his room and he leapt to his bed. I scrambled on the mattress but his weight held me down. I heard him growl lowly in my ear.

" So scary."

His lips attached themselves to my neck and my body went slack against the mattress.

I felt like I couldn't control myself when he was around. He could do whatever he wanted and I would be all for it. I couldn't figure out if that as something bad or good.

When his hand clamped around my thigh again, an unexplained noise came from the back of my throat. Edward pulled away from me, looking at me oddly.

" What was that?"

" Uh, I honestly don't know."

He laughed, but soon it was interrupted by his phone going off. Edward kissed my forehead and grabbed his phone, answering it quickly.

" Hello...Oh, hey, man...With Bella right now...No we were not...Let me ask."

Edward looked at me, " You want to go hang with James?"

" Sure, whatever. If you want to I'm cool with it."

" Alright, we'll be there soon...Fuck you...bye."

" He apologized for interrupting our ravenous sex session."

I rolled my eyes, " Of course he did."

Slowly I scooted off the bed and smoothed my skirt down.

" Do you think we could stop by my house? I would like to put on a pair of jeans or something."

" Sure thing, hot stuff."

~\\~

When Edward got to my house, there was absolutely nobody there. I invited him inside and he trailed behind me in a pretty confident manner. The front door was locked, confirming my thought of nobody home, and I unlocked it and let Edward inside.

He looked around for a long moment, taking everything in it seemed. He'd been here when we had gone on our date, but now he seemed to be analyzing everything.

" It's not some fancy mansion, but it's my house."

" I like it. It feels like a home."

I smiled and started heading upstairs to my bedroom. I hoped I didn't have anything laying on the floor, but I was pretty sure I picked up my room not too long ago. Edward was careful not to knock his head as he walked up the first few steps until it was open to the top floor. He was probably the tallest person to enter this house.

I was relieved when I opened my bedroom door. My room was organized.

Edward stepped into my bedroom and looked all around. I was almost nervous as to what he was going to think about it, because it suddenly did kind of matter. I grabbed the Scarlet Letter book off my bed and put it back on my shelf before turning to look at him.

" It's very...You. I love it."

" Is that so?"

He sat down on my bed like he'd been in here many times before, and I swear I heard him moan or something.

" Your bed smells just like you."

" Well, I'd sure hope so. Nobody else sleeps in it."

" Atleast not yet. I could fucking nap in here all day."

Edward rested his head on my pillow, but his eyes were wide and open on mine. The most cutest, but wicked crooked grin was on his face, and it made me smile back at him. He was laid right over my bed. Edward Masen was laying in my bed.

" I'm just going to change really quick."

I went to the bathroom and put on a pair of black skinny jeans, that still matched my shirt and decided to toss my hair up in a messy bun with a few pieces fallen. When I walked out of my room, Edward was still on my bed, and I went to my closet to grab my shoes. A simple pair of black flats.

I grabbed my dark blue zip up hoodie and Edward crooked his finger at me. With a smile I hopped up on my bed and crawled towards him. He grabbed me around the waist and pulled me down with him, pressing his lips to mine slowly.

" I've never made out with a boy in my bed before." I noted.

" I like the sound of that. We'll have to do it often."

Edward and I shamelessly kissed on my bed for just a few minutes. I felt like a teenager, except for the fact that I didn't have a parent downstairs and there was no excitement of getting caught. Hell, I didn't want to get caught anyways. I'd get reamed out.

We got to James' house fairly quick, and it was starting to get a little bit dark outside. After reaching the basement Edward and I collapsed onto the couch together in a heap. James looked fairly not surprised about this at all. Edward draped my legs over his thighs and pulled me close.

" Are we all happy couple, now?" James asked, handing me a blunt.

" Definitely." I said, grabbing my lighter from my pocket and lighting it up. I took a deep drag and handed it off to Edward.

" What did you guys do today?"

" Had lunch together and hung around. What about you?"

" Well, after pealing another clingy girl off my bed; I showered and ate. Awesome fucking day."

" Who was it this time, player?"

" Victoria Bennett."

I wasn't surprised.

Victoria is definitely the girl that often falls into James' bed. They are so off and on in a relationship that it's literally like a light switch for them. He constantly talks about how annoying she can be, but how

' absolutely fucking fantastic' she is in bed. I guess I can understand. James is all about physical aspects of a relationship. He's a guy. I can't blame him. I wouldn't be with a guy if he sucked in bed. Sexual chemistry is important.

One day I would hope that he would actually get his shit together about her. Until then, the light switch was well...still a light switch.

" She has huge knockers, man. First day of school she comes up to me wearing this fucking tiny as hell tank top shoving them in my face. Told her I wasn't interested and she tripped over her five inch heels while doing the fucking walk of shame."

James laughed loudly, " I'm not surprised she did that. Why'd you turn her down? Big boobs and big red hair not your type?"

" Not at all." Edward replied, resting his hand on my calf.

I smirked and James rolled his eyes.

" Of course. Brunette and small boobs."

" Hey! I do not have small boobs." I protested, looking down at my chest.

" Compared to Victoria you do."

" Shut up!"

Edward pulled me over onto his lap and rested one hand on my waist.

" I think your boobs are absolutely perfect, Angel."

" You're lying."

" Never."

He smiled and wrapped his arm tightly around my waist. I took the blunt from his mouth and took a deep drag. James opened his mini fridge and took out a bottle of Smirnoff that was in the freezer part.

" Yeah, I can't be getting smashed tonight." Edward said.

" Me either." I agreed, taking another drag.

~\\~

" Edward, come on, please?"

" I'm not dancing with you while you are drunk."

" You don't want to do anything while I'm drunk!" I whined.

He leaned forward and kissed my cheek. " I don't want you to fall."

" That's why I have you to help me. James over there is just a fucking...lazy ass!"

" Hey, take a chill pill, hot stuff."

I glared at him and put my hands on the zipper of my hoodie. It was fucking hot in here. I didn't want that thing on.

" Hey, now." Edward said, stopping me.

" I'm hot. Please let me take it off."

He shook his head.

" Are you my boyfriend, or my father? I don't even think you are my boyfriend. Did we make that official? I don't think so. So I can do as I please."

I hopped gracefully to the middle of the room and unzipped my hoodie, tossing it over on James' bed where he was laying on his back smoking a blunt. I walked over to him and bent down in his face. I stole his blunt and put it off to the side of my mouth.

" Are my boobs really that small?" I asked him with a laugh.

He grabbed my waist and tossed me on his bed. I yelped and laughed more.

" Your boobs are just fine, hottie tottie. I think your boyfriend over there is kind of pissed that you are in my bed."

I rolled over onto my stomach and looked over at Edward. He sat on the couch, watching me with an unreadable expression.

" He's mad at me."

" I'm not mad at you." he said.

" And I'm so not stupid. You are mad."

" Whatever."

I lifted myself off the bed and walked lazily over to Edward. He almost seemed annoyed at that point.

" I'm going to go get something to eat. I'll be back." James said, stumbling his way up the stairs.

Once the door slammed I sat down next to Edward on the couch.

" Hey. Please don't be mad."

" I'm not mad."

I sat in Edward's lap and turned towards him.

" I'm sorry that I get...flirty and crazy."

" Don't apologize."

" Too late." I teased,

" It just makes me jealous. I know it's just James but...I can't help myself."

I leaned forward and pressed my lips to his. Edward gripped me tightly and pulled me down onto the couch. I laughed against his mouth but was interrupted by his loud moan and body pressed against mine. The way he was pressed against me had me moan in response. He pushed his hands underneath my shirt and I tensed up slightly.

" Hey, not...Edward..." I stuttered out.

" I'm sorry. I'm really sorry. Fuck, I don't mean to take advantage of you."

" It's okay. I just don't want to do that here."

He looked at me in surprise, " Bella! Damn it you made me feel like I was..."

" You can touch me. Just not in the basement of my friend's house where I get stoned and drunk, and where we can get caught."

Edward licked my bottom lip and captured my lips in another kiss. His hand stayed on my waist, gripping it firmly to hold me to him. I ran my hands down his back and pushed my body up to his. He let out a low groan.

" We have to stop or else I will take it too far."

I shook my head and pressed on. He was hesitating.

" Okay, fine. Fine, fine, fine."

I pushed Edward off of me and sighed, running my fingers through my hair.

" Didn't you just say you don't want to do that shit down here?"

" Well, fuck. I don't know what I want!"

" Apparently."

" Shut up!"

" Fiesty."

" Edward!"

" Bella!"

" Ugh, you piss me off so fucking bad."

" You're sexy when you get pissed off."

He tickled my side and I squealed, " Can we go?"

" Where do you want to go?"

" I really want a fucking slurpee. That peach dragon shit is like, epic, babe."

" Babe?"

" Yeah, babe, let's fucking go."

" You are so drunk, Angel."

" Edward, let's go! I really want some sour patch kids, too. We can chill in your car and just...I don't know. Let's go!"

He grabbed his keys from his pocket and I walked towards the stairs. He helped me get up them, and we ran into James on the way out. I basically threw myself at him for a hug and he laughed.

" I'm getting a dragon slurpee, and I'll see you later."

James laughed, " Okay. Take care of her, dude. She...is a handful."

" He can handle me! I'm not that awful."

" I got her." Edward assured.

~\\~

" Fuck, these are good."

" I bet they are. After all you almost stole them."

" I did not!"

" You were going to."

" Edward, the police are going to come here! Stop saying that."

" Nobody is coming here." Edward laughed, pulling me to his side and holding me closely.

" Have you ever...done it...in your car?"

" No."

" Want to change that?"

" Maybe in the future."

I leaned over and kissed him before cuddling into his side.

" Aw, someone is getting sweet."

" Sour. Sweet. Gone."

" Mm, no gone."

" Do you think your parents know we are laying on a blanket in your front yard?"

" Probably not."

" You're so adorable. Do you know that? I look at you and its pure adorability. "

" Oh, really?" he asked.

" Yeah. Like fucking adorable and sexy all at once."

" Thanks."

" You're so welcome."

I put my slurpee down and rolled over onto him. He brushed my hair out of my face and smiled at me. I put one of the candies into his mouth and he chewed and swallowed it quickly.

" You're amazing."

" Why is that?"

" Because you are completely...Nobody has made me smile so much in my life. Or made me laugh so much. I finally feel just happy. Really happy."

I smirked, " Oh, yeah?"

" Yeah."

" I know something that will make you smile." I said suggestively, adjusting myself in his lap.

" Really?"

" Oh, yeah, babe."

I leaned down and kissed him deeply, resuming everything that we started in the basement before. He moved us to cradle me gently in his arms, and I sighed into his mouth contently. I felt his tongue fiddle with my lip ring, flicking it around. He flipped us over and pressed his upper body to mine, resting his knee between my legs.

It was over before it felt like it started. Edward got off of me and laid on his side next to me. He had an intense look on his face as he watched me.

" You know...A big part of me says that I'm nowhere near ready for a relationship, but another part tells me to never let you go."

" I know what that feels like." I murmured, staring up at the sky.

" Do you?"

" I've never...Been with a guy like I have with you. And I've never experienced these feelings before, or anything close to it. I don't...I never thought I'd be one of those girls who wears pretty skirts and goes out on dates and tries to look pretty for a guy. I mean I try harder to make sure my hair looks good, and in the shower, my legs are like fucking smooth as a waxed floor..."

Edward interrupted me with a laugh.

" And all I want to do is just be in your arms. I always want you to hold me and kiss me...To be perfectly honest; these feelings scare the shit out of me because I haven't known you that long. I know I sound like I am rambling, but I just can't help how I feel about you. I can't remember the last time I was happy like this."

" I can't help it either sometimes." he replied, taking me in his arms.

" I'm cold."

" Want to sneak into my room for a bit? I have a ladder."

" Huh?"

" You know those French doors in my bedroom? There is a ladder below it that's four feet above the ground."

" Fuck, I can just sneak over here in the middle of the night."

" There's a key for it."

" We'll make a copy! Let's go."

Edward and I ran around his house, laughing the entire way like it was an inside joke. When we got around towards Edward's room above, looking through the first floor glass wall I saw Carlisle. The glass wall showed the entire library, which was basically awesome.

" Shit!" Edward shout/whispered.

" Abort!"

" Here's the key. I'll give you a boost."

Edward grabbed my waist and lifted me up. I grasped the bars firmly and lifted myself up also. There was just a small part to stand on, and luckily the doors pushed in instead of out. I opened them quietly and suddenly felt Edward behind me. I stepped into his bedroom, dark and quiet.

" Want to watch a movie or something?"

" What time is it?"

" Only eight twenty."

" Well, one in the morning is the latest I can get home..."

" Then we've got plenty of time. We can check the movie channels."

I took my hoodie off and draped it over his lounger before laying face down on his bed.

" I'll take that as a yes." he said, grabbing his remote.

When he moved to lay on the bed I snuggled into his side, wrapping my body around his.

" Or we can just cuddle."

He flipped something on and lowered the volume. Edward wrapped his arms around my waist and ran his hand down my thigh to the back of my knee to hook my leg around his hip. I pressed my forehead against his chest, breathing in his scent. He nuzzled my hair and gripped me tighter.

I enjoyed every moment of it. I didn't want to move from this spot.

" Can we just lay here forever."

" Mhm." he hummed, leaning down to kiss my forehead.

" I never thought I'd like forehead kisses."

I groaned after hearing myself say it out loud. He chuckled quietly and kissed my forehead once again.

" You're adorable and sexy, and charming, and beautiful, and simply brilliant."

" Mm, I get it. You're cuddly."

" Cuddly?"

I burrowed my face in his chest and breathed in his scent. " Yeah. You smell really good, too."

" Thanks." he said with a laugh.

" Why haven't you kissed me?"

He looked confused, " I kiss you all the time."

" No, I mean, like, kiss me. You lick my bottom lip, which is awesome by the way, but..."

" You want me to ram my tongue down your throat?" he asked with a laugh.

" Yeah."

" Maybe I want to wait."

" Waiting to french kiss me? People wait to have _sex, _Edward."

" You are so random."

" I know I'm random. Hey, I'm really thirsty."

" Are you?"

" Yeah. My mouth is dry. Do you have like coke or something? Gatorade?"

" Mm, yeah, sure. Let's go."

" Carry me?"

" Why?"

" I feel like I'm made of rubber."

" How about I just get it for you okay, Angel? You lay down."

He got off the bed and grabbed the throw blanket at the end of it, that's a rich gold cover and silky looking. He grabbed my ankle and slipped my shoes off for me. I laid down and he covered me with the gold blanket. The back of it, which is the bottom, is silky, and the top is lusher. I wrapped myself around in it and Edward headed downstairs.

After about a minute suddenly his bedroom door opened.

" Edwar- Oh...I'm sorry, dear. I didn't know you were here."

I'm basically smashed and here if Edward's mother. I sat up and looked over at Esme.

" It's cool. Edward and I were just hanging out. He went to get me something to drink."

She nodded and moved to sit at the end of the bed, I sat up and she smiled at me.

" You know. I haven't seen my son this happy in a very long time."

" Really?"

" Yes. I'm sure you know about him having Marfan's. I was really hard on him, and so was the break up with his girlfriend Makenna at the same time. She was a wretched girl. No heart. Ever since then he's not been as high spirited as he has been in the past days. I miss seeing him like that."

" I'm glad that I can contribute to that...He makes me really happy, too." I was trying my hardest to keep my voice still.

" You've brought him so much happiness. I knew he wasn't very happy about moving here to Washington, but I think he just found a way to make it bearable."

I smiled and looked down at my hands. Just then, Edward walked into his bedroom with a bottle of cool blue Gatorade. He paused when he saw his mother, and looked slightly worried for just a moment.

" Don't worry. I'm not in here to get you in trouble for sneaking a girl into your bedroom. Looks like that ladder came of good use, hm?"

Edward smirked at her and handed me the drink.

" Thank you." I said quietly.

He reached out to touch my jaw softly before dropping his hands and looking at his mother.

" Fine, fine. I'll be leaving. No funny business."

" Me? Funny business? I am no trouble at all."

" Last time you said that you came home with another piercing in that bottom lip of yours."

" I love you, mom."

He kissed her cheek and she rolled her eyes at him. Once the door was shut Edward sat on the side of the bed.

" What'd she say?"

I smiled, " Nothing."

" Don't do that to me." he whined, pushing me to lay on my back as he hovered over me.

" She said that you've been happier since we've met."

I ran my fingers through his hair and he smiled. I closed my eyes as his forehead rested on mine.

" You make me happy. Your smile. Your laugh...Everything. And it scares the absolute shit out of me, too. How can I care so much about someone that I basically just met?"

" I know."

I wrapped my arms around him and kissed his lips softly. When we pulled away he laid next to me and pulled me into his arms. I adjusted my blanket over both of us as he held me as close as he could without crushing me. My arms wrapped around his neck as he buried his face in my neck.

We lay in that same position for an immeasurable amount of time, never moving or shifting. Soon enough Edward was asleep curled up against me. It was nine forty at that time. I didn't want to let him go.

He looked peaceful in his sleep. Beautiful. I traced his bottom lip and ran my finger over the silver rings in his lip. His brow furrowed for a moment and I rested my thumb on the crease, smoothing it out.

" Bella."

For a moment I thought that he woke up, but his eyes were still closed. His body shifted so that I was on my back and his head was resting on my chest. I ran my fingers through his hair for just a moment before closing my eyes and relaxing.

Everything felt perfect.

**Authors Note- Hello everybody.**

**For starters, link for Bella's outfits are my profile, you know the drill.**

**This week has been absolutely awful for me, so send me some love to cheer me up! I'd love to hear from you guys on your thoughts on the chapter! I love you guys!**

**Review!**


	11. Be My Escape

**Authors Note- Hello everybody! Thanks for the response last chapter!**

**Disclaimer- S. Meyer owns all things Twilight.**

**Chapter Song- Be My Escape By: Relient K**

~\\~

BPOV

~\\~

" SHIT! Bella?...Bella...Angel, you have to get up."

I groaned and rolled over, snuggling into the pillow next to mine. It smelt like Edward. Pure Edward. I smiled at burrowed myself deeper.

" It's past three in the morning. Come on, Bella."

I sat up and Edward sighed and ran a hand through his hair, " I'm so fucking sorry. I just woke up five minutes ago and saw my clock."

" Hey, hey. Calm down. It's not a big deal. My dad never gives a fuck how long I'm out, remember?"

" Sorry...How's your head?"

" It's fine."

" Are you staying the rest of the night or...?"

" I should get home anyways. "

He kissed my temple and handed me my hoodie. I zipped it up and slipped my flats on. Edward and I quietly snuck through the house, and got to his car without a hitch. We drove quietly to my house, and I was dozing in and out of sleep. I was really tired and while I didn't want to leave his bed, I didn't want to sleep at his house yet. We weren't together long, and I wanted to get to know him and even his family more before doing that.

I was also sure that they wanted to get to know me before they saw me all fucking cuddled up in his bed with him. That shit didn't seem acceptable at the Cullen's house.

When we got to my house Edward turned the car off smoothly and turned towards me.

" I had a great day."

" I did, too. Thanks for everything."

" And thank you for spending it with me."

I leaned forward and placed a simple kiss on his lips, " You're welcome. I'll talk to you soon?"

" Of course." he murmured, watching me.

" Goodnight."

I opened the car door, and just as I was stepping out Edward stopped me. He grabbed my wrist and pulled me towards him over the console. His hand tangled in my hair and he tugged my lips to his. Heat spread out through my body, feeling the excitement of his sudden need to kiss me. I grasped the hair on his neck and kissed him back. I waited for the tongue but he kept it chaste. Unfortunately.

" Don't go."

" I'll see you soon."

He placed a searing kiss on my lips before letting me go. I got out of the car quickly and darted towards the tall, sturdy tree by my bedroom window. I climbed it expertly and when I reached the level of the window, I slipped through into my bedroom and landed gracefully on my feet. That was a first in a long time.

I could have gone through the front door, but I didn't feel like having to be so fucking quiet. Charlie has ears like a hawk and I didn't need to be reprimanded for coming in this late.

I shut my window and leaned against it for a moment, smiling to myself.

For a few minutes I stood there, smiling like an idiot before I headed towards the bathroom.

Once I cleaned up in the bathroom I changed my clothes into a pair of shorts and a tank top. I grabbed kettle corn and a glass of water from downstairs. After drinking and getting fucking high all night, I was starved.

I turned on my bedside lamp and grabbed my laptop. I booted it up and checked my e-mail. I got one from my mom already, and a facebook friend request, along with a few notifications and another e-mail from some random website.

_Edward Masen added you as a friend on Facebook. We need to confirm that you know Edward in order for you to be friends on Facebook_

I clicked on the link and was on facebook. I confirmed him as my friend and went to my homepage.

Angela Weber- Date night with Ben! Best Spring Break ever! :)

Mike Newton- Bored.

Jessica Stanley- With the fam tonight. Movies and then dinner!

Ben Cheney- with Ange tonight.

Tyler Crowley- Disturbia was fucking bad-ass!

I skipped down to the rest and decided to look at Edward's profile and stalk a bit. His wall was full of ' Come back to Chicago!' posts from friends. When I finally found one that belonged to Edward, it was from the day we had our first date and went back to his house for a movie. I smiled at remembering that night and looked at the post.

_Feeling like the luckiest motherfucker on earth right now._

_9 Comments_

I clicked on the ' 9 Comments' and they appeared.

_Jeremy Landon- on Earth? What's got you all happy, bro?_

_Edward Masen- Yeah. On earth._

_Jeremy Landon- Didn't answer my second question. _

_Edward Masen- Hahaha, knew you'd catch that. I met someone._

_Jeremy Landon- Edward Masen met someone? Legit, dude? Is he good looking?_

_Edward Masen- It's a she you jackass. And she's beautiful. Legit._

_Jeremy Landon- Atleast something good came out of moving to that hellhole._

_Edward Masen- You can definitely say that again. _

_Jeremy Landon- Text me, dude._

The comments ended there and a grin spread over my face. I sighed and closed out of facebook, and proceeded to shut my computer down.

I went outside for a smoke before bed, brushed my teeth and was set.

Most of my life might be bad, and at times I want to fucking run; but Edward was the light in there, making it all worthwhile.

~\\~

April 16th

Monday

BPOV

~\\~

Our break honestly seemed to be over before it ever really started. I found myself once getting up again at six twenty to get ready for school. I stumbled through my morning routine, the shower not even being enough to wake me up. I'd been up late last night because Angela and Jess had come over to watch movies and just hang out. Out of all the days, they decided last night. I wouldn't argue.

I put on a pair of medium wash skinny jeans, a blue t-shirt that said 'SURF' stamped across the bust and 'New York City' underneat it in yellow print with a pair of yellow converse and went to do my hair. I just ran a foam through it after blow drying it, which made it sleek and smooth. My hair was already naturally curly, so I didn't bother to do anything because it looked nice. I did my makeup quickly and finished with a swipe of mascara.

Downstairs it was completely dead. Jake must have taken the early bus with Leah, and Seth was probably either still getting ready or Charlie had dropped him off. I poured a cup of coffee and put a bagel in the toaster, buttering and putting cream cheese on it when it was finished.

I ate it slowly, taking my sweet time because I didn't have to leave for another twenty minutes. Just as I picked up my coffee to take a gulp, the door bell rang and made me jump in my seat. A little of my coffee spilt over onto my hand and I yelped and grabbed a paper towel. I had no idea who in the world would be here at this time. It's pretty unusual.

I set my cup down and made my way to the foyer. I unlocked the door and opened it up, seeing Edward standing right outside with a grin on his face. He was wearing a pair of skinny jeans, of course, a pair of toms and a v-neck t-shirt that was white. It sounded simple but seeing Edward in it made it anything but.

" I didn't know you were coming over." I said, moving aside to let him inside.

He came in and I shut the door behind him. Edward turned to me and wrapped his arms around my waist, kissing the top of my head. The gesture made me immediately sink into him.

" I figured I could drive you to school. Is that alright?"

" Yeah, that's okay. You sure? When people see us they'll probably stare...a lot."

Edward laughed, " I know."

He followed me to the kitchen and took a seat at the chair that was across from where I had been sitting.

" Do you want coffee or something?"

He grabbed the half piece of bagel that I had started on and took a bite.

" No thanks."

I walked over to him and scowled. I grabbed my bagel back and set it back on the plate.

" You can't eat mine. I woke up this morning feeling like a starving homeless man."

" I'm sorry."

" Do you want me to make you one?"

" Yes, please."

I made Edward his bagel and once the plate was in front of him he ate right away. I guess I wasn't the only one who was completely starved. It was obvious that he was hungry. We talked and ate our bagels before leaving and heading off to school. I drank the rest of my coffee and ran upstairs to grab my bag and cell phone.

I was extremely glad that he had decided to come over and give me a ride. We've been spending a lot of our time together, and this short time was even valuable to me. But I couldn't deny my surprise when he showed up. I wasn't sure if he wanted us to go public, especially with this only being the beginning of his third week at Forks High. Apparently it was something that's not an issue though.

There would be its downside's though. One of them being Tanya, who I know will probably confront me about it. I didn't fucking care, I could easily handle her. What bothered me was the fact that she would most likely try something.

When Edward and I got to school a shiver ran down my spine, it was definitely colder outside then I thought. As I got out of the car, Edward grabbed something from the back seat and shut the door. He reached out to hand something to me, and I saw that it was a black zip up hoodie.

" Cold?"

" Thank you so much."

I slipped it on, and while it fit around my body, it was long. I pushed the sleeves up to my wrists and slung my bag over my shoulder. Edward's hand brushed mine as we headed towards the school and I looked at him before grasping his hand in mine, threading our fingers together.

We were stared at.

By everyone. Head's turned around. Mouths were opened, and some people even stopped walking completely and blankly stared at us like we were famous celebrities from Hollywood.

I saw Tanya out of the corner of my eye, standing next to Kate, and both of their mouths were dropped to the floor. I looked away quickly, not wanting to look into her fucking evil eyes any longer.

" When I get beat up in the girls locker room you are in trouble." I said quietly to him.

He ran his free hand through his crazy hair and looked down at me, " I'll make it up to you."

A sinister smirk spread over my face and I squeezed his hand.

Edward walked with me to my locker before heading off himself. He kissed my temple and squeezed my hand before leaving. I missed the warmth of his body next to mine; but I knew I'd see him soon. It was downright pathetic how much I hated not having him around. I opened up my locker and grabbed my Trig book, along with English and a few others and stuffed them into my bag.

When I walked into English Lit, all I saw was Tanya Denali shooting daggers at me. I took my seat in my desk next to hers and put my bag on the table. When I looked around, I realized it wasn't just Tanya staring at me. It was almost everybody. Her expression was the only one that was full of pure anger.

" Edward Masen, huh? You must be a good lay if he's sticking around with you for more than just a one night stand." She sneered

" I don't need to be a 'good lay' in order to date someone like Edward."

She scoffed.

" After all, I'm not you, Tanya. I can actually get a guy to stick around without sleeping with him."

" He'll realize that you're not worth it soon enough. He. Is. Mine."

I ignored her and the teacher came in a half a moment later, saving me from any further conversation. English passed quickly. We did a few work sheets on the Scarlet Letter, watched part of the movie and read a bit in class. Next I went off to Trig with Angela, and had two more classes before Lunch came around.

As usual, Jess and I met up in the halls and we both stopped at the vending machines to get flavored water. I really wasn't in the mood for their hot lunch pizza today, so I just grabbed an apple and sat down with Ben, Angela and Jess. Once I had settled in, suddenly Edward showed up and pulled the chair out beside me. It was always empty.

" Do you mind if I sit here?"

It was a chorus of 'of course not' from the group and Edward took a seat. His arm extended to rest on the back of my chair, his fingers grazing my neck gently. His other hand was carrying a brown bag, which he deposited on the table.

I think they were all shocked that Edward was sitting here, especially Angela. Jess looked at Edward and me and smiled brightly at us, as if she knew something we didn't. I held back an eye roll and leaned into his touch.

" Forks High's newest hottest couple, huh?"

" I guess so." Edward said, laughing quietly as he emptied the bag. " We really aren't as interesting as everybody thinks."

He brought out what looked like a roast beef, lettuce, mustard and mayo sandwich on French bread, and a bag of what looked like some fancy chips.

" Are these chips?"

" Homemade, yes."

" Cool."

" I think you should eat something. I don't want you skipping a meal."

" Edw-"

He gave me half his sandwich, telling me to be quiet, and I shut up and took a bite.

It was fucking delicious.

Stupid, delicious sandwich making, persuasive boyfriend.

" Jesus Christ, Bella. I didn't think you could eat that fast!" Ben exclaimed.

Edward took a last finishing bite of his sandwich and asked if he could have a sip of my flavor water. I gave it to him and he took a long drink, screwed on the cap and handed it to me.

" Want to go have a smoke?"

" Yeah, sure. You guys don't mind, right?" I said as I grabbed my bag.

They rolled their eyes and Edward and I headed outside. We went to the back of the school and where there were plenty of trees's to stay concealed.

I grabbed my pack from my bag and took one out. Edward lit it for me and then his own. I took a deep drag and leaned back against the building. Slowly, he moved closer to me and put his arm around my shoulders, pulling me to his side.

" Tanya came up to me today. She told me that I must be a good lay if I'm dating you. And apparently you are hers."

He rolled his eyes, " Don't listen to that shit."

" I know."

I smoked my cigarette down to the filter before disposing of it, and Edward did the same. We still had ten more minutes of lunch, so we hung around the back, sitting on the ground against the building.

" If you could go anywhere in the world right now, where would you go?"

" Italy. You?"

" Really? I've always wanted to go there, too. And Ireland, where all of my mother's family originated from."

" All of my family on both sides are Italian."

" My dad is full Italian." Edward stated.

" I've just always wanted to go there. I just want to eat pasta all fucking day, see the Trevi fountain. go to the Borghese gallery, Pantheon and the Colosseum...Eat more pasta. I just want to go all around Italy."

" We should go this summer."

" Seriously? Hell, I wonder if I did if my dad would care."

" Maybe when you graduate."

" I'm planning on trying to graduate early. After this semester I'll need only two credits, and I plan on taking summer school for both of those. And then I'm sending in applications to start in January at...wherever I end up."

" Sounds like a good plan you got there."

" What about you?"

" I got accepted into Julliard. And a few places in Chicago and in Seattle."

" Julliard? That's fantastic, Edward."

He looked away. " I'm not sure if I'm going there."

" Why? You told me that you'd love to go to Julliard! That would be great."

A big part of me sunk inside. I was happy for him. He talked about wanting to go there. It was his dream. The selfish part of me wanted him not to leave, but I couldn't expect that. I wanted him to live out that dream if he had the opportunity. It was right in front of him to grasp.

" I'm just weighing all options right now." He said shortly. I could tell he didn't want to talk about it any longer

" Okay." I told him, leaning forward to kiss him.

He wrapped his arms around my waist and I smiled against his lips. He pulled away and kissed my cheek, and then my jaw, and then all the way down my neck to my collarbone. I tangled my hands in his silky bronze hair, feeling his hand pull the zipper down on his hoodie I wore.

" No stripping at school." I whispered into his ear.

" Yes, stripping is fun."

" We're at school. And we better get inside. The bell should be ringing."

He groaned as I moved away from him and grabbed my bag. As I turned towards the school, Edward caught me and pulled me into his arms to kiss me. One arm wrapped around me, and his free hand cradled my jaw. The force of his kiss bowed me backwards, and I could taste cigarettes and mint in his breath. I touched his jaw and slanted my mouth over his, parting my lips for him. He didn't follow my lead, and instead pulled away from me, leaving me a hot mess and wanting more.

" I'm ready now."

I rolled my eyes at him, as we walked through the side door into the lunch room. Everybody was shuffling out, and Edward and I headed to Biology together. When we walked in class I tossed my bag on the table and sat on the stool.

When Mr. Banner walked in I took out my biology book, my notebook and a pen. I set my bag down on the ground next to me and sat up straight. We were handed a three page packet for chapters twenty seven and twenty eight, and told to read both chapters. We could have our partners help or do it separately.

Edward and I just did it on our own, knowing that if we started talking about Biology we would end up moving onto different conversation. We had a half hour to finish it, and afterwards we reviewed over the two chapters. Afterwards we had to sit through a grueling movie that Mr. Banner had put on.

He flicked the lights off and sat in his chair, not even paying attention to my movie himself and he was dozing off. Most of the student's had their heads on their desks, following suit of the teacher and taking a nap. Other's stared with a bored expression into the screen.

I leaned forward with my arms folded on the table, feeling the electricity between Edward and I crackling. He kept trailing his fingers over my arm teasingly, making me shiver.

Soon enough, Biology was over and I had to go to gym. I wasn't looking forward to our new segment. Badminton. Anything that involved a racket would end up with somebody getting smacked in the head. That somebody was most likely be myself. I'd fucking knocked myself out in baseball once.

I was teamed up with Mike Newton, and Edward and Lauren Mallory were teamed up together. Lauren Mallory is basically like Rosalie and Tanya, a complete and utter bitch. But she does her bitchy-ness solo more than half the time. We generally never cross paths at all. I've never had an issue with her

That statement changed the moment I saw her make googly eyes at Edward.

I understood it. He looked hot in those gym shorts and that tight shirt. But he was mine to ogle.

I served first and launched it in her direction. She put the racket in front of her face for some reason and squealed as it fell to the ground at her feet. I rolled my eyes and she served back. Mike launched the birdie hard in their direction and Edward smacked it back. It came towards me and I tried my hardest, swinging my racket forward just as Lauren was smiling at Edward.

And accidentally, by absolute pure fucking accident, I hit Lauren with the birdie, smacking her right in the forehead. I gasped and put my hand over my mouth. It was a perfect hit, but I didn't actually _want _to hit the girl.

" Sorry!"

" Oh my god! You so did that on purpose!"

Before I could blink she had it right back at me. I smacked it down and Coach Clapp walked over to us.

" Stop with the drama, keep going."

I rolled my eyes and continued with the game. Surprisingly, our team won. Mike was actually really good at badminton, and he basically carried me throughout the game. When I went to the locker room to grab my clothes, I heard Lauren talking to some girl by her locker. I changed into my previous clothes, including my - Edward's - hoodie. She kept sending me daggers over her friend's shoulder.

I went back to my locker and grabbed my bag and phone. Edward was already waiting outside for me, leaning against his Volvo and talking with Emmett and Alice. Unfortunately, Rosalie was also standing there, next to Emmett of course. I walked over to Edward and when he saw me he immediately slipped his arm around my waist and I leaned against him.

" Wow. You guys are sickening." Rosalie spat.

" Whatever you say, Rosalie."

Edward opened the passenger side for me and I slid in. He also got into the car and started it up.

" What a bitch." I sighed."

He chuckled, " Yeah. Bitch, is right...So...Where are we going?"

" Uhm, I don't know."

" Well, I have some of that Biology packet left. How about you?"

" I do."

" How about we go to your house and work on it together." he suggested.

" My house?"

" We don't have to if you feel uncomfortable."

" No, it's alright."

When we got to the house, Edward and I had a quick smoke outside before heading in. Leah was sitting at the table with Seth and Jake, yelling at them to shut up so that she could focus. I looked over at Edward, who didn't look uncomfortable at all, and asked him if he wanted a drink.

We went into the kitchen and Seth looked at Edward, his eyes wide and almost nervous. I glanced at both Seth and Jake, both of which who looked kind of intimidated by Edward and his tall figure.

" Jake, Seth, this is...my..."

" I'm Bella's boyfriend." Edward put in for me.

" Yeah. This is Edward. Edward these are my two step-brothers, Jake and Seth."

" It's nice to meet you guys." he said politely.

I grabbed two cokes from the fridge and poured them into two glasses. Once I was finished Edward and I went upstairs. We dropped our bags next to each other by my desk, and just as I was going to take the homework out, Edward was lying over my bed and sighing.

" Homework?"

" Later."

" How about we do it now so we can do whatever the fuck we want afterwards."

He groaned, " You have a point. Grab the black folder in my bag?"

I grabbed his folder, grabbed mine, and the Biology book. I sat on the bed next to Edward and flipped open the book. I handed him a pen and he opened the packet to start where he finished off.

" Do you have music in here?"

" Uh, yeah. My iPod doc is right over here. What do you want to listen to?"

" Got any bullet on there?"

" Yeah."

" Put that on, please."

I went to the Bullet For My Valentine song list and put it on shuffle. Edward and I worked together to finish the packet, filling everything in. He kept teasing me on how slow I was finding what to fill in because I did more reading then scanning. I figured knowing all of the information would be helpful for future tests. Edward didn't have the same view.

" Remember skim and scam? We learned it freshmen year." Edward teased.

" Shut up! Stop being so goddamn mean to me."

He rolled his eyes and took a sip of his coke.

" Anaphase for number thirty seven." I told him, writing it neatly on the line.

Edward wrote it down and I leaned over to look at his packet. His hand writing was very...elegant.

" What are you looking at, Angel?"

" You have nice handwriting.

" Thanks?"

I leaned over and kissed his cheek quickly and hesitantly. He glanced over at me with his eyebrow raised.

" Don't be shy." Edward chuckled, sensing my emotions.

" I'm not!"

" Kiss me."

" What?"

" Kiss me, Angel."

" Why?"

" Just do it." He challenged

When I leaned towards him, I laughed and paused. It felt almost awkward having to just initiate it myself. It wasn't familiar which made me shy away, and laugh at him. If it were the guys I used to make out with at James' party, either they would just fucking go for it, or I would be drunk enough to just grab onto them and do it myself. Edward makes me nervous all over though. I couldn't help it.

He watched me, and I stopped laughing and leaned forward again, only to end up resting my hands on his knee's as I laughed. It was fucking ridiculous, and probably looked like it to. I couldn't even kiss my boyfriend.

He wore an amused expression now as I tried to get a hold of myself.

" Why can't you kiss me?"

" I can. I can, I promise."

Edward just smirked and rolled his eyes, " Okay, let's finish this packet, hm?"

We only had one page left luckily, and we ended up finishing it rather quick, both of us quietly humming the music that came from the speakers of my iPod doc. Once we had completed it, I put my book and folder back in my bag, and put Edward's away for him also.

I didn't have any more homework to get done, so I was glad that I didn't have to waste any more of our time together by doing homework. Although doing almost anything with Edward was enjoyable.

I slipped off my converse and used the washroom really quick. I also brushed my teeth, not to be suggestive of anything... When I was finished I looked at myself in the mirror for just a moment before stepping out of the washroom.

Edward was scanning through my iPod when I saw him. He laid comfortably on my bed with his head on the pillow. Seeing him laying there made a small smile spread over my face. I loved seeing him on my bed, looking so comfortable and natural. Like he belonged there in a way/

Taking him by surprise, I grabbed the iPod from his hands, tossed it at the end of the bed and leaned down to kiss him. He responded immediately, moving his hands to my hips to pull me on top of him. I settled myself on him.

I slanted my mouth over his, our lips smoothly gliding over eachothers. His hands skimmed up and down my body, touching me in ways that lit my body on fire and made me moan against his lips. He seemed to enjoy that a lot. My hands rested on either side of his face. I gently flicked his lip ring with my tongue before running it over his bottom lip. His lips parted and I breathed him in, wanting more of him. All at once.

The hunger for him raged in the pit of my stomach. My desire and desperate need driving me insane.

" I can kiss you." I said against his lips when he pulled away slightly.

He cradled me in his arms and turned us on our sides to hold me. Edward kissed me softly, slowly, and intimately. The way he kissed me made me feel special and wanted. Like I was important to him. I felt his hand moving up and down my waist to my hip. I wrapped my arm around him, using my other free hand to touch his chest, lightly scratching over his shirt and down his stomach.

We laid tangled up in each other for awhile, it felt like it was forever; in the best way possible. The moment he pulled away he was looking into my eyes with those beautiful green orbs. The smile on his face lit up the entire room.

" What's that big smile for?"

" For you."

I looked down and smiled, " Oh, yeah?"

" Yeah. What's that smile for?"

" I haven't been this happy in a long time...A really long time."

" I'm glad I make you happy."

I kissed him once, and then twice before he was trailing kisses up my jaw to nip my ear quickly. I squealed loudly and he chuckled and bit it again. I squirmed against him and returned the favor by biting near his cartilage piercing. He jumped and his hands attacked my body to tickle me.

I shoved his hands away until he let me go and settled with a kiss on my forehead. I turned off the music that played from my iPod and set it on my end table. Edward sighed when I laid next to him once again, and he wrapped me up tightly in his arms like he always did.

Edward and I fell asleep quickly in my bed. It was amazing falling asleep in his arms. I didn't want to be anywhere else.

~\\~

" I'll get her, mom! Christ! Hey, Be-...Oh...sorry."

I sat up in bed quickly, feeling my head rush. Edward next to me was lightly snoring.

He must be a fucking light sleeper. I'd even pulled away from his grasp and now he was just curling up to the nearest pillow. I looked over at Leah, probably looking like a disheveled mess right now.

" Hey, uh...What do you need?" I asked, running a hand through my hair.

" Dinner is ready. My mom just wanted you to know."

" Okay."

Leah still didn't make a move, she was looking at Edward.

" Need something else?" I asked as I started laying back down.

" No."

She shut the door and I sat down next to Edward who was still fast asleep. I brushed his hair away from his face and leaned forward to kiss his forehead. As I did, suddenly his phone went off on the end table on the other side of the bed, where Edward was laying. It was loud metal music and I looked over and saw that it said 'Home' on the caller I.D.

" Edward? Edward, wake up." I said gently, touching his shoulder.

That didn't faze him.

" Edward, wake up. Come on." I said firmly. That seemed to wake him up a bit.

He stretched out with a long sigh before resting his head back on my pillow.

" Hey, you've got to wake up, babe."

The little nickname slipped out easily and Edward smiled and leaned up towards me.

" Why do I have to get up, _babe_?"

I rolled my eyes tiredly and reached over him. He groaned as I did and I grabbed his phone and handed it to him.

" Someone called, the caller I.D said 'Home' on it."

" Oh, okay. Thanks, _Angel_."

Instead of letting him go, I rested my head on his shoulder and wrapped my arm around his waist. He brushed his fingers through my hair as he held his cell phone to his ear. I closed my eyes and sighed against his neck.

" Hey, mom, you called?...With Bella...Yeah...Oh, yeah, making sure we're safe...I'm kidding...Okay...Maybe, I don't know...Alright, bye."

He hung up and put his phone on my end table, dipping his head down to kiss me slowly.

" Do you have to go?"

" Yeah. My mom is almost done with dinner. She said you are welcome to join."

" I don't want to intrude."

" Bella." he started.

" I don't. I mean, you and I just met, I don't want to be a bother."

" Well, this weekend you are invited to dinner. I'll tell my mother and we can set it all up. Does that sound alright?"

" Okay."

Edward hopped off my bed and stretched out, his long arms above his head. I did the same and grabbed his hoodie I used for the day, handing it over to him. He lifted it to his nose and smiled.

" It smells like you."

I winked, " Lucky you."

He rolled his eyes and I walked downstairs with him after he grabbed his school bag. I didn't escape to notice that my father had seen Edward standing there. Before walking out of the house Edward looked into our dining room with a nod.

" Have a nice evening."

Sue's eyes widened upon seeing him, and Leah was smiling to herself before looking up at us.

" Bye, Edward."

We went into the foyer and Edward fished his keys out from his pocket. I opened up the front door and he kissed me chastely before heading out to his car, giving me a smile before getting into his sleek Volvo. I closed the front door and went to join everyone at the table quietly.

I sat next to Leah and put some of the salad on the table, in my bowl. I didn't have a big appetite so I just dressed the salad and let just that be my dinner. I wasn't in the mood for anything else. ISue, Seth, Jake and Leah all participated in conversation, I stayed silent; as usual.

When dinner was over I left the table, cleaned up and put away the contents of the table, and went out on the back deck to have a cigarette. I took my time, enjoying the cool breeze that wafted through the air and ruffled my curls. Once I was finished I headed back into the house, secured the back door and headed upstairs to my bedroom.

I wanted nothing more right now than to be with Edward, in his arms again, feelings his lips on mine. I laid back in my bed and I could still smell his scent on my pillow. I curled up in bed and closed my eyes.

The silence made so many thoughts run through my mind, and of course Edward was the first thing on it.

The past few weeks have been amazing. More than I ever thought. I could only sit and say so many amazing things about him, about us together. But what if it was just some whirlwind romance? What would happen if someone better came along?

These insecurities were new to me in a way. After my father and mother got divorced I wasn't good enough to keep my father happy for just a little while. Something better came along there; Sue. I was nothing after that. Just a wisp of air in the breeze, nothing and unnoticeable.

I had to take in the consideration that Edward would probably be going to Juilliard. My heart knew that's where he was going to go, I just couldn't get my head on board. A part of me wanted to believe he'd stay here because of me. I knew that I wouldn't be good enough to make him stay. I was never good enough to make everybody stick around besides a few friends.

It was fucking stupid to doubt Edward. He's been nothing short of amazing. I should give him more credit and believe that he wouldn't drop me like yesterday's trash. I just couldn't get it out of my head the fact that one day he might not be here, and it scared me. He already meant so much to me, already a vital point in my life in just a few short weeks. The happiness I feel around him is fucking ridiculous, but amazing nonetheless.

I didn't deserve him. I don't deserve him. He's so much more than I am. He has more potential to do something amazing in life.

Without another thought I called up James and told him I was going to head over. He wasn't busy, and luckily he didn't have any company of the female variety. When I got to his house, I immediately headed downstairs to the basement and saw him rifling through his fridge. I plopped down on his recliner and looked at my hands.

" Something wrong?"

" Yes...No...Kind of?"

" Talk to me." James said, plopping down on his couch with a bottle of water tossed in my direction. I caught it and took a long pull.

" Edward makes me so happy...and it scares me."

" Why does it scare you, Bella?"

" Because...Everything has been so perfect and a part of me is just waiting for something bad to happen, something that will make everything not the same."

" He's absolutely crazy about you, you know that? I mean, the dude is over the fucking moon."

" It's just...With my parents, everything was perfect for so long, I thought that they were perfect, and it seemed like it; and then I came home one day and it was over, it was gone and taken away from me. And I know that I am worrying about this so early in our relationship, but what happens when he graduates. James? He said he wants to go to Julliard, and that's across the country. And if I do graduate in August, and he leaves after...How can we make it five and a half months? How do I know we'll make it to August? Or that I'll even get into Columbia? And another part of me wonders if this is something long-term for him. Is he just looking for a high school sweetheart? Some fun before he moves across the country? Am I just looking for a sweetheart? What if I-

" You need to stop." James interrupted.

I looked over at him and he looked at me.

" You're right, this is way too damn early to be worrying about. Edward has been so burned in the past, Bella. And he is taking a chance with you because he wants to, because he trusts you completely not to hurt him and shit. That's why I asked you that night if you were serious about him. But you can't keep worrying about it. Everything will work out, alright? I fucking promise you that when the time comes, everything will work out for you guys. It's okay to be scared, just don't let it ruin what you've got with him."

I got off the couch and leaned towards James to give him a hug. " Thank you. I just needed someone to tell me it's okay."

" Hey, I'm always here for you. Whether you need to get high or need someone to tell you it's alright to be scared. It doesn't make a difference."

" Thank you, so much."

He hugged me back tightly and kissed my temple, " No problem."

" I don't know what I'd do without you sometimes."

James laughed loudly and I sat back on the couch, " Oh, really?"

" Yeah. I mean, you're like a rational version of me."

We smoked a few cigarettes in his basement, hung out and just talked like we used to. I miss just talking aimlessly to James about our lives. We used to spend so much time down here in my first two years of high school. Ever since last summer we haven't had that time and I missed my friend. He was excited to actually be graduating this year, and he was thinking about going to the community college in PA. I was happy for him. He finally got the drive to fucking do something with his life, and seeing him excited was something new for everybody to see.

" I mean, I know I fucked around a lot in the beginning, but I'm fucking grown up, I know what I want to do."

I smiled, " I'm happy for you."

" I'm happy for you, too, kid. You deserve someone to make you smile."

I was happy for me, too.

**Authors Note- Soo? I know this chapter is fluffy and filler-ish. But it's going to be a fluffy summer for Bella, so be prepared for it. There's still plot though, don't lose sight!**

**Bella's outfit in my profile, you know the drill.**

**Do we think we can reach 100 reviews? My 100****th**** reviewer will get a teaser for next chapter, which is traditional for me to do. But maybe for anybody who is the 100****th**** reviewer or is after the hundredth reviewer will get a teaser for the chapter also! Change is the spice of life! **

**Let me know what you are thinking and send me something nice!**

**Review!**


	12. Stories That Haven't Ended Yet

**Authors Note- Hey, everybody! I so wanted to get this up earlier. But the past 24hrs have been absolutely crazy and I just got able to sit down and edit for you guys. Again, I'm really sorry.**

**Disclaimer- S. Meyer owns all things Twilight.**

**Chapter Song: Happy Endings are Stories That Haven't Ended Yet by: Mayday Parade**

~\\~

April 21st

Saturday

BPOV

~\\~

" You're asking me to prom?" I asked skeptically as he smiled at me, still looking somewhat timid.

" Yeah...Well, remember when you talked to me about graduating in August?" I nodded, " I figured since we both know that's how it's going to work, you wouldn't be able to have your own senior prom. I want you to have that experience."

" Edward, I'm not...I don't need those experience's. In fact, I hate half the fucking events the school throws."

" Are you saying no?"

" No!"

" Then what are you saying?"

I sighed, " If you want to go, because of you, then yes, I'll go with you. I just don't want you to feel obligated because of me, okay?"

" I don't. So you'll go with me?"

" Yes, Edward."

He smiled in satisfaction and kissed my forehead.

" Look what the cat dragged in." I heard Rosalie sneer.

I ignored her and leaned against the counter.

Edward grabbed a Raspberry-Apple and Peach-Mango vitamin water from his fridge and held both out to me. I grabbed the Peach-Mango and thanked him before taking a sip. He dragged me over to the living room area and sat down on the couch, pulling me down next to him.

" So, Bella Swan, is my emo step brother taking you to prom or what?"

" Yes, and he isn't 'emo'."

" Oooh, aren't we defensi-"

" Hello, everybody!" Alice chirped loudly as she skipped into the room.

" Hey, Al. Why so chipper?"

She plopped down on the couch, wearing the biggest grin on her face. It almost looks like it would crack her face in half. I leaned back into Edward, grasping his hand in mine as Alice jumped up and down and clapped.

" Jasper Whitlock asked me out on a date on Friday night and he wants to go to prom with me!" she exclaimed.

Rosalie's head popped up, " He did?"

" Yes! And he is like, so, so cute! I really like him."

" You better be careful, little sister. Dad's going to have a fit."

" Who cares! He'll get over it once I give him my puppy dog eyes. Nobody can resist those!"

Edward laughed and shook his head. Emmett did the same and plopped down on the couch obnoxiously. Alice continued to chatter on and on about 'Jazzy' until her phone went off, and with a high pitched squeal, she was running upstairs to her bedroom.

" Babe, let's go upstairs." Rosalie said to Emmett as she started heading towards the foyer.

" Can't we just chill with Edward and Bella for awhile?"

" Uhm, no. Why do you want to hang out with them anyways?"

" Geez, I don't know Rose, maybe because I'm always hanging out with you. Edward is my brother, and Bella is cool to hang out with. Can't we just be down here for awhile?"

" Cool?" Rosalie laughed, " You're funny, Em. Come on."

" So, did you guys see the color of the graduation gowns? I don't think I can pull off gold/yellow. I'm sexy, but I don't think anybody is sexy enough to pull that off."

" Yeah, I know. I just got my gown yesterday and I was like what the fuck? I have to get the smallest size but it's like a t-shirt on me so they have to specially order it so that it's longer."

" Ahh, dude, that totally sucks. Maybe you should get fat."

" I'm sure Bella will like me when I'm fat. I just hate getting fucking special treatment."

" Hey, rather than then they give you a bigger size and you look like a float in the Christmas parade on the television." I told him.

I laughed at that image and Edward glared at me. Emmett busted out into loud guffaws, his head thrown back and body shaking. I'd admit, picturing that was really funny. Edward in a gigantic gown with how skinny he was, everybody would laugh at him.

" Hey, I'm sorry, but that image is fucking hilarious, babe." I laughed, patting his knee.

" You're funny as hell. She's a keeper around here."

" Are you just going to ignore me?" Rosalie screeched.

" I don't know, Rose, are you going to keep telling me what to do?"

" I don't tell you what to do!"

" Since the moment I got here. Fuck, if I knew you were this clingy I wouldn't have started anything with you. Just go home." Emmett ground out as he stood up, walking out of the room and past a shocked Rosalie.

Edward stood up and I followed suit, leaving Rosalie in the kitchen. Just as we were heading upstairs, I heard her loud, obnoxious heels clicking on the floor. She opened and slammed their front door. Edward joked at her to make sure to lock it, and she gave him an icy glare and just to spite him, didn't lock it.

We walked down the hall to his bedroom and saw Esme as we were heading down the hallway. She smiled brightly when she looked at me and I smiled kindly back in return.

" Bella, it's nice to see you! How are you, dear?"

" I'm good, and yourself?"

" Great. I'm so glad you've decided to have dinner with us tonight. I'd like to get to know you more, especially since you're all my Edward talks about."

She looked at her son with adoration that made me smile. Edward rolled his eyes and Esme just smiled at him and reached up to ruffle his hair. I could see a tint of pink on his cheeks and I'd never seen him actually get embarrassed.

" Would you like any help with dinner?" I asked,

She waved me off, " Of course not, you kids go have fun. But I don't want to hear any funny business."

" Mhm, come on, Angel." Edward said, smiling deviously at his mother as he dragged me away.

Once we were at the end of the hallway Edward lifted me up into his arms to go up the three steps to his bedroom, and I squealed loudly. He walked through his bedroom door and kicked it shut with his foot.

" So, what's on the agenda until dinner?" I asked him.

" Anything you want."

I went over to sit on his lounger and laid back; touching the plush blanket he tossed over it.

" This is where we first kissed."

" I know. I don't think I could forget that."

He sat at the edge of his bed and I looked over at him.

" I've never seen you in a suit before." I noted.

Edward quirked his eyebrow, " You haven't."

" And I can't wait to see it…I still can't believe that you want to go to prom. I thought we'd ditch and just get fucking high."

He laughed, " Don't tempt me."

" Well, we could. I could come over, maybe a pair of shorts, a tank top…We can just lay around, smoke, make out, enjoy ourselves." I said slowly.

He was in front of me in a flash and he put his face in front of mine. Our lips only inches apart.

" You're the devil."

" I'm one badass bitch."

Edward chuckled and rested his hand on my knee, sitting at the end of the lounger. He lifted my legs and draped them over my lap, his hands moving over my legs, massaging them. Slowly he pulled up the hem of my jeans, touching my skin and kneading it.

" That feels nice."

" You are wearing some fucking tall heels." He noted, looking at my black, four and a half inch pumps.

I smiled at him " Sometimes I feel so short next to you."

He grabbed the thin heel and pulled it," I like when you wear your chucks and skinny jeans."

" Oh, really?"

" Mhm. I think it's cute. But I'd wish you'd realize that you're so fucking beautiful and you don't need all that eyeliner under your eyes."

" Edward…"

" Shhh. I like you just the way you are. You're so fucking perfect to me. I just wish sometimes you'd see what I do."

I shrugged and he pulled the hem of my pants back down and scooted up next to me.

" I will always think you are beautiful."

I flushed and shoved his shoulder.

We stayed upstairs until Alice called us downstairs for dinner. After prying myself off his comfortable chest after a nice little nap, we went down and headed into the kitchen. He held my hand tightly in his, pulling me closely to his side.

Everybody was at the table, it was Esme, Carlisle, Emmett and Alice. Edward pulled out my chair for me and I took a seat, thanking him.

Esme had made pasta with a light cream sauce over it, and what looked like mushrooms cooked in with it, and a sprinkle of cheese on top. If it tasted half as good as it looked, I knew that I'd be satisfied. We all served out food before the real conversation started.

" Thank you so much for inviting me for dinner, I appreciate it so much." I said thankfully.

Carlisle and Esme smiled warmly, " Of course, Bella. You are welcome any time." Carlisle replied.

" So, Bella, what do your parents do?"

" Well, my parents actually split when I was younger. My mom lives in Florida, re-married, and my father is Police Chief, as you probably know, he is also re-married."

" Oh, I'm sorry to hear that you're parents aren't together."

" It's alright. Eventually you learn to get over it."

" Is your step mother nice?"

" Uh, yeah, she is."

" I bet your father is probably proud, Edward has told us how well you've done in school and how your planning on graduating early. I can only imagine how proud your family must be of that."

" Mom, how about we talk about something else."

Esme looked concerned, " Is something wrong?"

I looked down at my lap, willing the next words to come out. I looked up at her and sighed.

" My father and I aren't on good terms, and I am civil with my stepmother. We no longer have a relationship. Generally, I do not speak often with them unless required."

" Oh, I'm so very sorry for pushing the subject..."

" No, it's perfectly fine."

Edward rubbed my knee under the table and I smiled at him reassuringly.

" Have you lived here all of your life, Bella?"

" Yes, I have. Once I graduate I'm hoping to go to New York and attend Columbia."

" Really? Edward is planning on going to Julliard in the fall, aren't you Edward." Carlisle stated, something about the way he said it made me feel odd. I couldn't pinpoint in, but the entire conversation he's seemed to be very reserved.

" Yeah."

" So, Bella, you are seventeen?"

" Yes."

" And planning on graduating in August, how do you plan on doing that. Not that I doubt you being able to?" Esme asked curiously.

" Well, ever since I was a freshmen at Forks High, I've taken extra classes during the summer to earn more credits, and after this semester is finished I only have to get two more credits in order to graduate, and I am planning on getting both of those credits through summer school. It worked out perfectly considering I can only take two summer school classes at a time. And they do have a graduation for students who graduate early, and I will be a part of that group. I've already talked with my counselor about it, and my teachers. It's all set up."

" Wow. Brilliant and beautiful. You picked a special one, Edward."

I blushed.

" Edward plays the piano absolutely astoundingly. Have you heard him play?"

I looked over at Edward, " Actually, I haven't. I hope someday he'll share it with me."

" He wants to get his degree in Piano/Organ B, which would be his Bachelors degree. Juilliard has been his dream for so long."

A big part of me was absolutely ecstatic for Edward, but I wondered why he never talked about his college plans with me. I was happy for him when he told me he got into Juilliard, but I wanted to know about his passion for piano, and I wanted him to talk to me about it. I wanted to hear him play, because I knew that he could be nothing short of astounding. He always surprised me.

" That's really amazing." I stated, looking at Edward as I did.

He looked...not angry, but not exactly very pleased. As he had done for me earlier, I rested my hand on his knee and then felt his left hand cover mine. His fingers weaved through mine and I held his hand tightly in mine, squeezing his fingers.

" And he got an amazing scholarship." Carlisle added.

" I think that's enough about me." Edward interrupted, taking a large bite of his pasta.

I grabbed my fork awkwardly with my left hand and took a bite of the pasta.

" Everything is absolutely delicious, Esme." I complimented.

" Thank you! I figured tonight I would pull out the big guns."

I smiled, " Well, thank you very much."

We finished up with dinner and Alice insisted that we should watch a movie. As Alice stole Edward away to grab a movie from his bedroom upstairs, I stood in the kitchen with both Esme and Carlisle. Emmett was standing awkwardly by the table not really saying anything, but shifting his weight back and forth.

" It sounds like Edward hasn't told you of his college plans." Carlisle said.

Esme shot him a look.

" Oh, well, Edward told me about his plans with Juilliard, I just wasn't aware that it was for piano. He spoke very briefly about it. I know that some time in the future we will probably talk about it more. But we have a little while to talk about it."

" Well, obviously Edward will be leaving here in the fall to go to New York, which is across the country from Washington. He'll be quite far away from you."

I wondered what he was trying to get at. A part of me knew what was going to be coming next, but I was hoping that it wouldn't come out of his mouth. The way he talked to me almost sounded cruel, and it was unexpected. It made me feel uncomfortable, and when I looked over at Emmett, I could see that, too.

I talked to James about it. He told me not to worry, but when I have someone who is somewhat family to Edward telling me this; it hurts a lot more than just conjuring the thoughts up in my head myself.

" Do you think that you'll stick around if he does leave? What if your plans for Columbia don't work out? Edward can have an amazing future infront of him; I don't want some girl to mess that up for him. He might not be my son, but I look out for him. When Esme mentioned him hanging out with a girl I was hoping it was just someone he would get over quickly and move on after summer; I hope you understand that your relationship with Edward is very unrealistic right now. I know you are a smart girl and can understand that."

My stomach dropped to the floor.

" Carlisle!" Esme scolded. " What do you think you are doing?"

" Am I the only realistic thinking person in this house?"

" Dad..." Emmett said

" Thank you for having me for dinner, I appreciate it very much; but I think it's time for me to go now."

I fought the tears back as I turned and walked towards the foyer.

" How could you do that to her? Edward is not going to react well to this." I heard Esme say furiously.

" Esme..."

I grabbed my keys frantically from the side table by the door and patted my pocket to make sure my phone was there. Just as I unlocked the door I heard footsteps on the stairs coming closer towards me.

" Bella, where are you going?" I heard Alice ask.

I said nothing.

I opened the front door and shut it behind me firmly, feeling like I almost wanted to die.

I didn't want to mess up Edward's future. And what if he did think of me like a before college fling? I knew in my heart that he wouldn't do that to me, and I hoped that it was true. As I was walking down the stairs towards my car I heard the front door open behind me.

" Bella! Alice told me you were leaving, what's wrong?" I heard Edward say as he caught up with me.

When he saw the tears in my eyes he froze immediately in his spot.

" What did they say? Tell me."

He put his hand underneath my chin and made me look at him. A tear slipped down my cheek and he asked me again.

" Carlisle told me...He was asking me if I'd stick around when you left, and what would happen if I didn't go to Columbia. He was telling me that he didn't want 'some girl' messing up your future, and that our relationship is unrealistic, and I should know that because I'm a 'smart girl'." I struggled through my words, but once I was finished, the look on Edward's face was livid.

" Son of a bitch."

He turned around, holding my hand firmly and was walking towards the house. I followed after him. I was too scared to let go of his hand. Fuck, what happened to the person inside me that stood up and fought for shit?

" Edward, don't, I don't want to cause any trouble."

" He's not my fucking father! He has no right!"

Edward ripped through the front door and was sprinting towards the kitchen. His eyes were murderous when they landed on Carlisle, who looked very shocked by the look on Edward's face. I still had my hand in Edward's and he didn't seem to be letting go anytime soon.

" How fucking dare you." Edward said lowly.

" Edward, please." Esme quietly begged.

" YOU AREN'T MY FUCKING FATHER! YOU HAVE NO GODDAMN RIGHT TO SAY ANYTHING." Edward shouted loudly, repeating what he said to me to Carlisle in a harsh manner. I winced.

" I'm looking out for you, Edward." Carlisle said calmly.

" Bullshit. You put up with me because of my mother. I have a father, and that isn't you. I am never going to be your son. Ever. And you think you have the fucking right to say that to someone I care about? You don't. You can say all the shit you need to say to me, but don't you ever _dare _say that to her. You have absolutely no idea what goes on in our relationship."

" Your being unrealistic, Edward."

" Unrealistic? That's a fucking joke."

The way Edward was acting almost scared me. I wasn't scared of him, but I was scared for him. He was breathing off, and he was yelling loudly. Esme looked completely concerned with him, and I rested my hand on his chest. His heart was frantically beating underneath my hand, and I looked up at him worriedly.

" Edward, you have to calm down. This isn't good for your heart, honey." Esme said.

" Your sticking up for him. As always, aren't you?" Edward stated.

" No! From the moment I met...Bella, dear, I have absolutely nothing against you. You remember the night I came into Edward's room when you were laying down? I meant every word I said. I am so happy that you make him happy. Whatever makes you happy Edward is all that matters to me; you know that. I've made that clear."

" Then tell your husband to keep his fucking nose out of my life. I've moved from my home because of him, away from my friends and dad. The least I can get out of that is for him to mind his own damn business." he spoke to Esme like Carlisle wasn't even standing there, and when he finished, he grabbed my hand.

" Hey, let's watch that movie, okay?" Alice said, pulling at my free hand.

I just followed her to the living room and Edward sat on the couch, breathing hard. I rested my hand on his chest once again and he leaned his head back, trying to calm himself down.

" Are you okay? Edward, you're scaring me."

" My...Alice, can you get my pills from upstairs?"

She was gone in a flash, and I stood up abruptly.

" What do you want to drink?"

" Bella, I-"

" Tell me."

" Just water."

I went to the kitchen and got him water as he wanted. Alice came downstairs just as I handed it to him and she handed him three, different shaped pills. He downed them quickly and took a swig of water. Emmett sat down on the opposite couch next to Alice, looking over at Edward and I, but mostly at me.

" I'm really sorry, I would have stepped in but he would have had my ass later."

" It's okay, Emmett." I said quietly.

Edward didn't say anything. I leaned into him, resting my head on his shoulder. I grabbed his left arm around wrapped it around my waist, he complied and held it there tightly. He moved to lay down on the couch and pulled me up to lay on his chest. His heart was calming down more and his breathing was more even. I rested my head in the crook of his neck and rubbed his chest with my hand in soothing circles.

" Is this what we are going to get throughout the entire movie? You better not start to make out."

I felt Edward's arms encase me, one resting on my lower back and the other stroking from my hip to my waist. I didn't even see what exactly we were watching; I fell asleep immediately.

~\\~

I woke up later in Edward's bed, curled up under his covers in the same dark wash jeans and fitted v-neck as before. My shoes were off my feet and deposited somewhere in his room.

His bed was drenched in his scent, and I wished I could lay here forever. With a quiet sigh I sat up, letting the sheets fall and running a hand through my hair. Edward was sitting in his lounger with his laptop on his lap, clicking and typing away.

" Hey." I said quietly.

His head popped up and he gave me a small smile. " Hey, you. Sleep good?"

" Uh, yeah. Really good. Sorry I fell asleep on you."

" You don't have to apologize."

" I feel bad for stealing your bed."

" I like seeing you asleep in my bed. How many times do I have to tell you that you're just fucking adorable."

I smiled and laid back down, closing my eyes. " You are so cheesy. I thought I got the boyfriend who was all tough and, fuck you, fuck everything, fuck authority."

I heard Edward get up and felt him slip into his bed behind me. He curled his body around mine and kissed the back of my neck. " You bring out a nicer side to me I guess."

He moved me around to lay me on my back and he dipped down to kiss me. I tangled my fingers in his hair and pulled him down on top of me, wanting to feel his weight on me. Edward covered his lips with mine over and over, moving his hand over my body smoothly. It skimmed down over my waist, tracing my hip and down my leg, around my knee. His hand curled completely around the back of my knee and he bent my leg, pulled it up, and hitched it around his hip.

I gasped into his mouth, surprised at his movement and felt him consuming me. I put out an olive branch so to speak; tracing his lips with the tip of my tongue. Edward slanted his mouth over mine and thrust his tongue into my mouth suddenly. His breath was pure mint and Edward. I tentatively touched my tongue to his and then moaned at the contact. I wanted more of him. Fuck, it had been better than I'd ever imagined it would be.

My hands found purchase running down his back and underneath his shirt, feeling muscular, smooth skin. I lightly scratched his skin, feeling him quietly moan into my mouth. The passion behind his kiss almost melted me into a pile of nothing. I leaned up to press my body closer to his, desperately wanted to get closer; wanting to get more. He held me so intimately, making me feel cared for; like he always does. I moaned into his mouth, feeling the metal piercing in his tongue come in contact with my tongue.

Edward moved his hands up to cradle my face before sliding them back to tangle in my hair. I sat up on feet; my knees bent, and pushed Edward on his back, never breaking our kiss. He had other ideas. I felt his lips break away from mine and he kissed down my neck. My breaths came out in small pants, my chest heaving frantically. I pulled Edward's mouth back to mine and he complied with what I wanted; his lips on mine.

It was a few minutes of heated kissing until I rolled off of Edward to catch my breath.

" I'm really sorry about Carlisle, Angel."

" It's okay."

" No, it's not okay.." Edward started, " College," he sighed, " That's something that you and I will talk about when the time comes. It's not any of his business what happens in our relationship, okay? Don't let him tear us apart because of his pointless thoughts and opinions."

I nodded and curled into his side, " I know, and I'd fucking never let anybody tear us up."

Edward kissed my forehead, " Did you like your 'real kiss'?"

With a grin, I looked up at him, " I did."

He moved me onto my back and kissed me again, more soft and gentle, less urgent. His fingers ran through my hair for just a moment before he pulled away to smile at me, resting his forehead against mine.

" I care about you so much, I hope you know that. No matter what, you're always going to be the most important person to me."

" I do know. I care about you, too."

I put my hands on either side of his face and stared into his eyes. I leaned up and chastely kissed him before laying back down, curling into his side. I closed my eyes and he ran his hand over my back.

" Cold?" he asked when a shiver ran through my body.

I nodded and Edward maneuvered us around the bed. We laid together in his bed, talking about anything and everything that came to our minds, but avoiding the awkward dinner and what. I loved this time the most. When we could just lie down and not care about anything but each other. Edward fell asleep in the middle of our game of twenty questions, his head pillowed on my chest and his arm wrapped protectively around my waist.

It was bliss.

~\\~

May 8th

Tuesday

BPOV

~\\~

Eventually Tuesday had come around, the Tuesday before Prom that is. I had completely put off getting a dress; which I knew was very essential and had to get done. It was fucking prom, I couldn't show up in one of my summer dresses.

I was sitting at the lunch table with Edward today. Angela and Jess were kind of upset that I sat with him sometimes, but I knew that they still understood. Alice was at the table with us, and Emmett, Jasper and Rosalie. We all had the same lunch period, oddly.

Alice was all cuddled up next to Jasper, her head on his shoulder. They were a couple now, and constantly holding hands and each other. It was kind of sickening. And Rosalie was basically in Emmett's lap as he consumed ridiculous amounts of food. Edward and I simple sat next to each other with our hands linked to rest on his leg.

" I still haven't gotten my prom dress; what about you Bella? Rosalie?"

" Of course I have my dress." Rosalie basically spat. " I'm always prepared."

Alice gave a sour face and I decided to save her a bit. She's a good kid, and Rosalie was being a bitch.

" I don't have mine yet, Alice. I've been busy with work that I haven't had the chance. You know, some of us have important things to do to earn shit to get somewhere."

Rosalie scowled and Alice smiled at me.

" Well, Prom is Sunday...How about we go on Friday!"

" Oh...I have to work."

Jasper's eyes cast up and he looked at me. " What time?"

" From four to nine thirty."

" I can cover your hours for you." he offered.

I was shocked. Jasper and I have never really talked much at all, and now he was offering to take a shift for me at work? I almost reached my hand up to pinch myself, and I saw Rosalie glaring at him. I smirked in satisfaction and looked at Jasper.

" That would be great. Thanks, a lot. And if you ever need me to do the same just ask, alright?"

He nodded once and Alice squealed and clapped her hands. Edward squeezed my hand and I looked up at him with a grin on my face. He leaned down to kiss me, just a quick, chaste kiss.

" Ew!"

" Then don't fucking look." Edward replied, leaning towards me and showing them evident tongue as he kissed me.

I pulled away from him and took a bite of my salad. Apparently I didn't gauge how much I forked because I couldn't get it all in my mouth.

" That was so attractive, Bella." Emmett boomed.

" Fuck off." I said, but it sounded more like, ' Fuh ahhf.'

He laughed at me and Rosalie rolled her eyes in an annoyed manner. I felt Edward wrap his arm around me and I swallowed my bite.

" Fuh ahhf to you, too, Bella." Emmett joked.

~\\~

On Friday I found myself cruising towards Port Angeles with Alice in the car with me. She was just chattering on and on and anything and everything. I thought that Jess could be bad with the rambling, I bet hearing them both have a conversation would give someone a damn headache.

But Alice is a sweet girl, and if I was dating Edward; I did want to get to know her.

She had apparently gone online and found this dress boutique. I wasn't familiar with Port Angeles when it came to dress shops, and neither was Alice obviously, but when I heard Alice talking about it, it sounded cool. Apparently a lot of it was vintage but still with modern dresses. I didn't want to get a huge ball gown dress; that definitely wasn't my forte.

When we get to the boutique and walk inside, I realize that it isn't that bad. And that we are the only ones here. Alice immediately is running towards the dresses with a big grin on her face. I roll my eyes at follow her, looking through the racks.

Pink tulle

Purple tulle

White tulle

Glitter

All of it was fucking tulle and sparkly glitter. I started looking over by darker colored dresses and Alice scowled.

" You don't want to wear black do you? It's not a funeral!"

" Black is my thing. So, you can buy your favorite hot pink dress of some sort and I'll get what I want."

~\\~

Alice did end up getting her perfect hot pink dress. I wasn't surprised.

She had gotten a strapless layered mesh mini dress with a beaded sweetheart neckline. It was definitely her personality, and she had already found the dress she wanted after trying three on. It fit her slim body perfectly, and she was ecstatic to have found it.

Finding mine however, wasn't. I tried on at least ten fucking dresses before I even came across one that I could just barely stand. I sighed in frustration and tore off the dress. Not only did I not like the style, but a lot of them didn't fit my body shape.

Apparently nobody in this world could be skinny and have boobs. Just as I was about to grab my jeans and just call it an epic fail, Alice threw a dress over the door and demanded I put it on.

The dress was mostly a dark grey color with a little bit of black. The first layer had a black velvet design on it, with a satin fabric underneath the pattern, and the bottom of the dress was a very soft, almost feathery tulle-like fabric. There was a slight sweetheart neckline, which wasn't drastic thank fucking god, because most of them showed way too much cleavage.

I slipped the dress on and it fit like a glove, everywhere. No place was too much fabric or too less. It felt like it was made for my body. When I stepped out of the dressing room, Alice squealed and I looked in the mirror.

" Wow, this actually looks good."

" Good? I mean, I think when Edward see's this he might go just a little bit insane."

While it fit perfectly, I loved how it looked on my body. It was strapless, and showed off my thin shoulders, and my hair fell loosely to about mid-bust. I looked at the back and though I fell even more in love.

" It's perfect." I said.

She smiled and clapped her hands, " I'm so glad you found your dress!"

Before making our purchase, Alice had also gotten a pair of shoes. They were a silvery/white with jewels in the middle, and almost looked kind of bridal, but Alice seemed to love them and they matched her dress.

When I thought about shoes, I knew exactly what kind of shoes I wanted to wear with the dress. I had a pair of three inch pumps that were a little strappy and had a small buckle around the angle, with clustered roses going all down the front of the shoe. They are definitely one of my favorite shoes, but a little bit fancy to wear as an everyday heel.

Alice and I actually hung around Port Angeles for just a short while. She wanted to go to the Tiffany's store that they had in the mall. We also had to stop at a store to get Jasper a tie to match her dress. It was pink, just like her dress and it was made out of pure silk.

Later when we walked out of the Tiffany's jewelry store. She walked out with a beautiful, diamond flower necklace that she planned to wear with her dress.

It was fifty five thousand dollars total.

Not fifty five dollars.

Fifty five _thousand _dollars.

I couldn't at all grasp that concept. She just slid a credit card over to the lady with a huge smile on her face and walked out of the store, saying that she had used up all of her monthly limit.

I had no idea they were that fucking rich. It was dumbfounding.

When we headed back to Forks, I figured that we could get something to eat so I stopped at Forks diner. Jasper was, in fact, working my shift and served us when we got there. Alice leaned over and kissed him on the lips quickly. I paid for our meal, as thanks for Alice coming along with me and helping me with the dress.

She really was nice, and had a pretty crazy personality. I could definitely tell why she and Leah got along. When I went to drop her off at Alice's house, I didn't go in with her because I was exhausted and I knew that I was going to end up falling asleep in Edward's arm, and waking up at three in the morning to head home.

Not long after I had gotten home Edward had texted me. We talked for a little bit on the phone before I passed out right in the middle of the conversation. Shopping with Alice for only a few hours was already tiring.

~\\~

BPOV

~\\~

When Saturday came, I had awoken early to get ready for work. I was already wiped out from shopping with Alice yesterday. She was a handful and I have no idea how anybody could keep up with her on a daily basis.

I spent the entire Saturday working and doing homework, I never got a chance to even talk to Edward. At around three Jess had showed up at my house with her computer and we wrote our English papers together. We had the same teacher, just at a different period. We always used to do homework on Saturdays or Friday nights that was until I got a job and had other shit to do. I missed those times, they were few and far between now.

Jess stuck around my house for awhile before I decided that I wanted to hit the sack early. Tomorrow was prom, and I wanted to get up early in the morning to possibly sneak into Edward's bedroom to sleep with him for a little while. Not talking to him at all for a full day was actually weird; thinking about the days before I had in my life depressed me.

How my entire life had been turned upside down because of him shocked me. I couldn't imagine my days without him. He was my light.

I didn't really see anybody. My father worked all day, Sue kept to herself all day, and Leah and the boys were probably with friends. I made myself dinner in a house so quiet that one could hear a pin drop. I saw Jake walk out of the house, and that was it.

By the time that Jess had left I was already showered and getting into bed. Edward had texted me, but I didn't reply. I wanted to wait until the morning to talk to him, and give him a surprise, hopefully a nice one.

Luckily, I fell asleep fairly quickly and found myself up at six thirty, stumbling around my bedroom to grab my things. I grabbed my dress, makeup bag, my shoes for prom and a change of clothes, and drove to the Cullen's house in a pair of short plaid shorts, a tank top and a pair of beat up converse with a messy ponytail.

I was a sight to see.

When I got to the house, the entire property was quiet, just the sound of rustling tree's with wind. I put my purse over my shoulder and ran around the house, feeling like a complete stalker. When I got to the ladder for the door in Edward's room, I was scaling the ladder quickly. Once I got on the small plank I grabbed my keys and put it in the lock.

Edward also had a special lock for his bedroom door, that also went with the French doors. He'd given me the spare lock, in a way of telling me that he had nothing to hide and that I was always welcome. I trusted his anyways, he's given me no reason not to. Once they were open I looked over at his bed and saw his long body underneath the covers, and a flash of bronze hair on his pillow, but his face was hidden. I set my bag down after re-locking the door, and kicked my shoes off.

I crept towards his bed and pulled back the comforter.

Fuck...

He was sleeping in only a pair of boxers.

I crawled into bed behind him and put my arms around his waist. He shifted around, slightly startled, and opened his eyes to look back at me.

" You scared the shit out of me. I thought you were some rapist."

" Sorry for scaring you, but I can't deny the rapist part."

I ran my hands over his chest and he rolled over and trapped me beneath him. He wrapped his arms around me and dipped down to kiss me. I wrapped my legs around his and moaned quietly. I felt his hand move up my ribcage and I smiled and pulled away from him.

" And here I thought I came here to sleep."

" Sorry." he didn't sound apologetic at all.

" If you're done groping my chest maybe we could sleep more? I got up at six thirty."

He sighed and took his hand away, and instead wrapped his arm around my waist. I ran my hand over his waist and down his lower back to touch his ass. He let out a strangled noise and I giggled quickly and gave him a squeeze before letting go.

" Nice ass, Masen."

" Just nice?"

" It's sexy."

" You bet it is."

He leaned down and I felt him lick over my jaw before capturing my lips and kissing me deeply. I groaned into his mouth, sort of disgusted with the fact that he had licked me like I was a fucking animal.

" Not now, later." I gasped out.

" It's later."

Edward repeatedly kissed my jaw before kissing me again once more. I pushed my body up into his and could feel his reaction to me. I could feel my face heat up, and I pressed my hand against his cheek, feeling slight stubble on his cheek.

Then he pulled away.

I was panting so heavily that it was almost embarrassing. Edward pressed his forehead into my shoulder and linked his fingers through mine. He moved onto his back and pulled me onto his chest. I rested my head over his heart and my hand on his stomach. His arm wound around my waist tightly and my eyes fluttered closed.

" We're always sleeping and napping."

" Mm. Sorry. Would you like to go for a run."

" Fuck no. Goodnight, Bella."

**Authors Note- Bella and Alice's Prom Dresses and outfits are linked in my profile.**

**Teasers are sent out for whoever reviews this chapter. Have questions? I'll answer!**

**Review!**


	13. Ours

**Authors Note- So, I know most of you are probably shocked that I know how to update at a regular time. Well, I figured I'd surprise you all since this afternoon I was free!**

**Warning** Girly makeup details to come. Don't complain. I love details and you know it!**

**Disclaimer- S. Meyer owns all things Twilight.**

**Chapter Song: Ours by: The Bravery.**

~\\~

BPOV

~\\~

We woke up at around ten, and ended up lounging around in Edward. He held me in his arms for awhile longer, and to be perfectly honest I wasn't in the mood to even leave his bed. We slept for about a half hour before deciding that it might be nice to actually go downstairs. Alice had already knocked on his door to alert breakfast being made.

I waited for Edward while he took a shower, and once he was finished we walked downstairs. I stole one of his grey pullovers from his chair before leaving and headed downstairs. Everybody looked surprised to see me, but neither Esme nor Carlisle looked upset.

" Bella! I didn't know you were here!" Alice exclaimed.

" She snuck into my bed this morning." Edward filled in for her.

I sat down at their kitchen table and rubbed my eyes tiredly with my hands. I felt two hands rest on my shoulders and Edward leaned down towards me.

" Do you want some coffee?"

" Uh, yeah. But I can get it."

" No, stay there. How do you take it."

" Two teaspoons of cream, three teaspoons of sugar."

" Someone has a sweet tooth." Emmett said with a laugh as he sat down with a plate piled with pancakes, bacon and scrambled eggs.

I shrugged and suddenly a plate was right in front of me, full of steaming food that smelt absolutely delicious.

There were three big fluffy pancakes in the middle of the plate, with bacon off to the side; on a separate plate was a whole fuck-ton of hash browns and scrambled eggs. I looked up at Esme, wide eyed.

" Thank you so much, but I hardly think that I can eat all of this."

Edward plopped down next to me, setting my coffee by the plate, " I'll help."

He leaned over and kissed my lips chastely. Esme took her seat next to me with some pancakes and coffee. Edward slathered the pancakes in butter and a little bit of syrup. I put salt and pepper on the eggs and hash browns and started digging into them. Carlisle sat down next to Alice with his coffee, kissing the top of her head as she beamed at him. I could see how much she looked up to her dad by the affection she held in her eyes.

I felt envious in many ways, but I smiled and looked over at Edward who was shoveling pancakes into his mouth quicker then Emmett.

" Are you going to leave me any?" I asked him.

" I swear to god, he eats more than Emmett and he's the skinniest one in this family." Alice chided, rolling her eyes at Edward.

" Haha, you're so fucking funny Alice."

She stuck her tongue out at him and Esme laughed, " Children."

" So, Edward, is your dad coming for graduation?" Emmett asked

" Uh, yeah. He called yesterday."

" Well, that's very nice. And Bella will be able to meet him." I heard Esme say politely.

" Yeah...He's really excited to meet you." Edward told me quietly.

I looked over at him, " You talk about me?"

" Of course I do. What else do I have to talk about? This town is so damn boring."

I smiled at him and ate a bite of the pancake Edward had cut up. We all ate breakfast, Edward as they said, eating the mass majority of the food. I had no idea that he could eat so much. Afterwards we all cleaned our dishes up and everybody split off for the most part. I went outside and grabbed my makeup bag and dress and put it in Alice's room as she instructed.

I hung out in my pajamas in Edward's room for awhile, and also helped him clean and dust a little bit. At three it was when Alice was forcing me to her bedroom. We had to leave the house at four fifty, because it would take about two hours to get to Seattle. It would be two and a half, but apparently with 'the way Edward drives, we'll be there in two, trust me'. I just complied and went with the flow, for once.

Alice had my dress on a hanger on the inside of her closet double doors. Yes, double doors.

Her room was all pink and white. The walls were painted a pale pink, and her bed was a mix of hot pink and white. All of her furniture, unlike Edward's, was completely all white wood with silver knobs and handles. On her fluffy white carpet, there was a huge, even thicker and fluffier hot pink heart shaped rug.

It was very personalized though. Behind her bed there were pictures everywhere, of friends, family and I saw a few pictures of her and Jasper that were probably new. There were also nature photography pictures that she'd also taken from all different places. New York, Chicago, LA, Hollywood, Disney World, and even Mount Rushmore. It was put together so creatively, in a way that was completely Alice.

" I figured we could do each others make up! Is that cool?"

" Yeah, of course."

I grabbed my make-up bag and spread out everything I'd like to use, and Alice put together an idea of style for my eyes, and I did the same for her. She wanted her eyes to look smoky, but still bright in a way.

" I wish I knew how to do smoky eyes like you do! Any makeup tips?" Alice asked, continuing to chatter as I dipped the brush in powder.

I put a chocolate brown color on her eyelid, and put in a sparkly gold color into the crease. It was all in the blending and color mixing. I blended it up, but not high enough to hit her eyebrow. I lined her eyes with a brown eye liner just on the top lid like she wanted, and curled her lashes and put mascara on them.

She'd already put bronzer and what-not on her face so I just put her lip gloss on for her and then she got to work on me. I had her do basically what I did to her eyes, but in dark silvers and grey's. She did a darker color on the lid, and lighter silver in the crease, blended it up a little with my instructions, but used a white shimmer eye shadow on my brow bone. She used liquid liner on my eyes, and winged it just a little at the end, and lined the bottom also. I had a fair powder on my face all over, but I wasn't sure about my lips once we'd finished.

" How about red? Give a pop of color, but not too dramatic."

Alice let me borrow her red lipstick, and she used a brush to put it on.

" If you didn't have this damn ring in your lip this would be easier." Alice grumbled, trying to weave the brush through the ring to get my entire bottom lip. I tried not to laugh and stayed still. Once she finished I put a clear gloss on over it.

I used her bathroom to put on my dress while Alice used her bedroom. The dress fit me perfectly, like it had before. I struggled to zip it, but eventually was able to get it. I was not planning on wearing a bra with the dress, but when I got home and tried without, the dress didn't have much hold to it. I put on my black lace strapless push up bra and a pair of matching underwear.

Once I had my dress on, I put my heels on. Yesterday I had painted my toes red, and my nails were manicured earlier in the week and hadn't chipped luckily. Alice was in her dress also, and then we finished with our hair. My hair was already curly naturally, but I wanted it to be a little curlier, just looser. Alice let me borrow her curler while she did her hair in its usual spiky style. Once my hair was loosely curled, I grabbed some bobby pins so that I could pin it back. I put just the top layer of my hair back and proofed it up just slightly, and used a barrette to pin it back. Alice helped me with bobby pins to secure it, and a few tendrils fell in front of my face, and my bangs swept to the side of my face regardless of my efforts.

I put on my red heart necklace and chained it behind my neck and set it right in the middle of my chest. Alice planted us in the middle of her floor length mirror and smiled in satisfaction. I looked in the mirror and actually felt beautiful.

" We look hot."

I laughed, " Yeah. Thanks Alice for helping me get ready."

" Oh, thanks to you, too. It was really fun."

I think she could tell I was eager to go find Edward, so she let me go and handed me my makeup back and my folded clothes. I walked to his bedroom and knocked on his door once; when he said that I could come in and I opened the door slowly and looked inside.

Holy fuck.

Edward in a suit was absolutely amazing. He stood by his bathroom door, in a perfectly tailored black suit, a white button up shirt underneath tucked into his black slacks, which were also secured with a black leather belt, and a perfectly fitted black suit jacket was over it. Around his neck was a dark grey tie, almost silver. His shoes were pretty fucking shiny, and they were dress shoes that looked very, very expensive; as did the suit. I almost didn't want to touch him. He was perfection.

His eyes scanned over my dress and he smiled when his eyes finally met mine. I walked closer to him and he wrapped his arms around my waist tightly, still scanning my face.

" You look beautiful, absolutely stunning, Angel."

" And you look...I...Be glad that we have to get going or we'd be in here a really long time."

He raised his eyebrow at me. " Bella Swan likes men in suits?"

" Not just any man. And this suit looks extra fancy."

" Gucci?"

" You bought a Gucci dress just for prom?" I asked him in surprise. " Those suits are like two thousand dollars."

" I actually bought this one a year ago. I generally wear it to any black tie event; a few come up every once in awhile in my life."

" Oh, of course, Mr. Masen." I said with a smile.

He kissed my forehead and pulled away from me for a moment, looking into my eyes.

" I got something for you, actually."

Edward pulled away from me and went to his bedside drawer.

" Now, I know that generally as my date I should have gotten you a corsage, but I figured that you and I are a little different than just the typical rose tacked onto a piece of stretchy fabric."

He produced a leather box; it was bigger than a ring box though, but not by much. I looked up at him and Edward once again walked towards me and opened up the box. Lying on the satin pillow was a tennis bracelet with diamonds and rubies. The diamonds were in a more wave design, and the rubies were nestled into the crooks of the wave, encrusted into the bracelet.

It was breathtaking, and so much more than I ever deserved. I didn't even want to know the amount of money he spent on it.

" Edward..."

" I know you are going to say that it was expensive, and that I shouldn't have, but I want you to wear it. I want you to have it. I bought it just for you."

" Thank you." I whispered,

There was a part of me that was saying that it was too much to accept and I should refuse it, but the look in Edward's eyes was pleading. He took the bracelet out and brought my wrist up to clasp the bracelet around my right wrist.

" You are very welcome."

I kissed his lips quickly, not wanting to get my lipstick on him. I glanced down at my wrist, looking the beautiful bracelet and I felt his fingers run through my hair softly.

" How about you head downstairs, and I'll be there in just a moment." he suggested.

" Okay." I said, hugging him closely to me once more before releasing him.

When I got downstairs Alice was already there with Jasper by her side, and I also saw Emmett, with Rosalie standing next to him with a smile on her face. She was wearing a tight, floor length fire engine red dress with a _plunging _neckline and a halter style. When I stood behind her, I saw that it was backless, and I could almost see her underwear.

_Fuck, this girl has no shame._

Neither do I but I wouldn't wear _that _to Prom. A _school _event.

" Bella, where did you get that bracelet?" Alice asked as she held up my wrist to examine the bracelet.

" Edward gave it to me just upstairs."

" Wow. It's so pretty!"

Out of the corner of my eye I saw Rosalie glare at me, and Emmett had a ' fuck my life' look on his face. I smiled at Alice and whispered a quiet 'thank you'. She didn't drop my hand, instead she led me to the kitchen and handed me a plastic case which inside had a boutonniere. It was a single red rose with small white flowers around it.

" Thank you so much for getting this for me, Alice. I appreciate it."

She waved her hand, " No problem. I had to get one for Jasper anyways!"

I smiled and Alice and I went back to the foyer. Edward was standing there, running his fingers through his bronze hair. It stuck up, and as always, gave that look of just rolled out of bed. I stepped towards him just as Esme came into the room with the camera, and opened up the plastic box.

I'd never done this before, it felt so foreign to me. If anybody would have asked me weeks ago if I'd be standing here, next to my boyfriend, ready to go to prom, I would have probably laughed and asked where they got their drugs from. But no, now I stood next to a beautiful man, who asked me to go to prom because he _is _my boyfriend.

Edward smiled as I took out the rose and brought it towards his lapel, smiling at him as I did. I heard the camera clicking fervishly as I did. I successfully pinned it to his jacket and he leaned down to kiss me softly. The lipstick and gloss had dried a bit so he didn't have a trace left on his lips.

Esme insisted on pictures. She took pictures of all sorts. Of the boys together, the girls (Rosalie was not pleased), many of us with our others, and everybody as a group. Edward grabbed his keys to the Volvo and we headed outside. Alice and Jasper apparently were going with Emmett and Rose, so it was just Edward and I together.

He opened the car door for me, as always, before getting into the drivers spot.

The entire drive there we mostly listened to music or talked. We didn't have to stop once; we were able to drive all the way through. At seven twenty we arrived at Shilshole Bay Beach Club. There was a professional taking picture of couples by the deck that overlooked the ocean, and others scattered around and getting out of cars.

Edward helped me out and I saw kids from Forks, but also from La Push here. They generally always collaborated when it came to prom and sometimes homecoming. When we got inside, the place was big, open, and really well planned out. In the middle was a dance floor, and all around there were very colorful decorated tables. They even had servers with food that at some point would be coming around. They had a drink fountain for everybody to take as they please, along with water, sparkling grape juice and punch.

It kind of sucked that Angela, Jess and Ben weren't going to be here, because they were going to be attending their senior prom, but I was still happy that I was here with Edward, and I was able to even go in the first place. Technically I wouldn't be able to attend my own prom because of an early graduation.

" Nice set up." Edward noted.

" I agree."

" Mm, now let's go find some source of fun in this decorated mess."

~\\~

I took another bite of pasta salad and set my fork down afterwards, taking a large gulp of the water I had. Everything so far was going pretty good, and then Edward insisted to dance with me. Honestly, I knew that I couldn't really dance that good, but the way he looked into my eyes completely mesmerized me and I couldn't say not to him at all.

He swept me towards the dance floor during some random slow song.

" Aw, hell. This Kiss? Faith Hill? Nice timing, Edward." I said with a groan.

Edward laughed and wrapped his arms around my waist, pulling me towards him. I wrapped my arms around his neck, trying to lean up as much as I could.

" Shrink down a bit." I laughed.

He bent his knees slightly and I tried to stifle my giggles. We just swayed from side to side, not doing anything special, but it was still nice, and I'd do anything to make him happy. Once it was over, he stood up straight and I still had my arms around his neck. My feet dangled off the ground and I gripped onto him tightly.

" I won't drop you." he assured.

" I know."

Edward twirls me around once before setting me on my feet gracefully. I smile and lean into him, feeling deliriously happy; and it feels amazing to be that way. We share a few more dances together before we sit down for a short while and talk with a few of our peers. I was glad not to embarrass myself with more swaying moves.

I was honestly having a great time, and I'd never imagined that I actually would have this much fun. Generally, the only time I've danced was probably at one of Ben's or James' parties, and let's just say that isn't the kind of dancing appropriate for here. Edward could fucking ball room dance, and he was really amazing at it.

Tonight, I actually felt like a teenager, I didn't feel like the Bella who was always working and studying, I was able to be the person I'd always wanted to be, and knowing that Edward was able to make me feel this way made it all the fucking better. I couldn't imagine anybody else standing next to me, holding me in their arms; than Edward. It sounded corny, but it was true.

He seemed to be having an equally as good a time as I was. I also noticed Alice and Jasper fooling around on the dance floor. Emmett was trying to get Rose to dance with him, but all Emmett was doing was flailing his legs and arms, it was pretty hilarious.

I left Edward momentarily to use the washroom, and once I had and finished, planning to head back; I turned around I came face to face with none other than; Tanya Denali. She was wearing a super short and tight hot pink dress and white platform heels. Her hair looked like a fucking poodle's hair gone wrong, and her makeup was caked on; as always.

Her eyes were on my bracelet, and I knew almost immediately that Rosalie must have told her something. I wasn't going to let them ruin my night with Edward though. This was our prom, and no bitch like her was going to make it anything less than amazing.

"Looks like you got what you want Swan. Getting showered with gifts by Edward already, are you? We all know that's what you are really after."

" Really, Tanya? Edward gave this to me as a gift. I never asked for anything. Not that I have anything to fucking prove to you."

She scoffed, " Right...That bracelet should be mine."

" Too bad it isn't."

I started to walk away from her but she grabbed my wrist and gave a sharp tug to the bracelet. I could feel the diamonds digging into my skin as she pulled, but I turned around and shoved her away. Luckily, the bracelet didn't snap.

" Bitch!" she screamed at me.

" Leave me the fuck alone. You and I both know I can do more than just shove you away, so leave me and _my _boyfriend alone tonight. You aren't going to fucking ruin anything for me."

I left the bathroom and returned to the table. I looked down at my wrist and saw that the skin had broke and there was a little bit of blood oozing out. I mumbled a quiet swear word and suddenly Edward was right in front of me.

" Are you okay? What the fuck happened to your wrist?"

" Tanya tried to pull my bracelet off in the bathroom. Apparently she thinks that it belongs to her." I said, grabbing a napkin. Edward took it from me and dipped it in the glass of water before bringing it to my wrist and dabbing it gently.

"Are you kidding me?"

" Rosalie must have told her about the bracelet. Her eyes went straight for it when she saw me. I shoved her off and left."

He pulled me to his chest and looked around. Suddenly Alice was walking towards us with a worried look on her face, immediately asking what was wrong. I told her what happened in the bathroom and then, without warning, Alice was running off towards Rosalie and Emmett.

I went after her to stop but she walked right up to Rosalie and was right in her face. Emmett looked confused as hell, and Jasper gave me a helpless look.

" You are such a bitch! You are just so jealous of Edward and Bella's relationship that you will do anything to sabotage their night! I'm so sick and tired of you Rosalie and it's only been a few weeks! You treat my family like trash, but you know what? You are trash, and a stuck up, ugly, bitch!"

Rosalie's eyes were murderous, and looked like she wanted to slap Alice across the face. Jasper reached out and grabbed Alice, pulling her to his side in a protective manner.

" I'm not jealous of anything they have."

Alice scoffed, " Yeah, right."

" Can everybody just stop!" Emmett exclaimed, " What the fuck is going on?"

" Tanya saw me in the girls bathroom, and Rosalie had to have told her about the bracelet Edward got me because she went straight for it. She tried to break it off but it didn't work, instead she cut into my skin. She is under the impression that Edward is hers, and whoever stuck that thought into her mind is a fucking lunatic." I filled in.

" So what if I told her?"

" That bottle blonde bitch hurt my girlfriend." Edward said lowly.

" Oh, please, Edward. You really want to sit here and tell me that..._she _is the one that you want?" Rosalie asked, referring to me, " Isabella Swan is nothing but a lonely, white trash, unloved piece of shit." She finished slowly

I was still, and I said nothing in response to her words. I knew that I could have said things twice as worse back at her, but I had to be bigger than that, no matter how much I wanted to charge at her and ring her fucking neck out.

" No, Rosalie, I think you are very sadly mistakes. Look at yourself. You're parents are too busy to even care about whites going on in your life, and your only friend is Tanya Denali. The only good thing you have is Emmett, and I honestly don't know how he can sit and say nothing about what you've done and what you've said in the time we've known you." Edward said calmly

He wrapped his arm around my waist and led me towards the doors that led to the outside, right on the beach. I stopped for a moment and slipped my shoes off my feet and Edward tossed the napkin on one of the empty outside tables. He held my hand in his as he walked out towards the water with me by his side.

We walked along the beach without a word between us. I looked out towards the water and felt the cool sand on my feet.

The light wind rustled the tree's, and a few stray leaves blew around in the air before floating down onto the soft, grainy sand. I could smell the fresh scent of the ocean, it was refreshing and clean. A light mist hit my legs when the water rushed closer and the wind hit it. Despite the cool sand, the air was warm and musky, bathing us in it.

The sun had already gone down, and all that lit up the outside was the crescent shaped moon. It made the water look almost a silver/black color. The only other light was far back towards the building, where a few kids were hanging out outside where the tiki lamps were lit up. They looked like small flecks of light from where Edward and I now were walking.

" Do you want to stay over tonight?" Edward asked.

I looked up at him, leaning into his side further. He looked stressed out, and I didn't like seeing that look on his face. I didn't want to be causing trouble, but that was what happened. Trouble always followed me on a fucking never ending trail.

" Do you want me to?" I asked.

He nodded and stopped walking. His arms wrapped around my waist in a tight embrace. It was like he thought that I would disappear if he didn't hold on tight enough. I slide my arms around him and press my face into his neck, breathing in his scent.

" I'm sorry for what happened tonight."

" It wasn't your fault."

" It was. I wish I just didn't say anything. I hate drama and I hate causing it even more. This was supposed to be our night."

Edward pulled away slightly and looked at me straight on, " Bella, this is our night. This time is ours. And it wasn't your fault. It's all Rosalie and Tanya, but I won't let them take away all the fun we've had tonight. I won't give them that power, they don't fucking need it."

I nodded and suddenly felt the water rush over my feet. I laughed as Edward frantically moved back so he wouldn't get his pants wet. Once we were safe he released me. We walked back towards the Shilshore building but didn't go inside. Instead we sat in one of the chairs together and watched the ocean. Edward had his legs propped up on the short railing. He pulled me into his lap and I put my legs over his as his arms wound around my waist.

" You know...Back home the hot tub is all set up." he whispered in my ear quietly.

I smiled, " Oh, yeah?"

" Mhm."

" I didn't bring my bathing suit."

" We can stop at your house and pick it up."

" I'd like that." I hummed, running my hand up and down his arm.

" So would I, my Angel."

~\\~

Soon we left prom, and we hadn't even seen Rosalie, Tanya or Emmett when we came back in. Alice told me that Tanya had apparently made this big exit after getting into a fight with Rosalie. Apparently Rosalie was upset because Emmett was mad at her for everything that happened, and now it was all being blamed on Tanya.

Now Alice and Jasper didn't have a ride back, so Edward and I would have to help them, which was no issue. I just couldn't believe that Emmett would just leave his sister and her date at prom. Luckily, we were here to give them a ride. We danced a little bit more until around ten we decided to head back.

Alice had insisted that we stay for crowning king and queen. Honestly, everybody knew who it was going to be. Principal Greene stood up on the stage, both of the crowns at his side on pillows and everybody was looking at him, wanting so badly to be the ones who were king and queen.

Edward and I just wanted to go, but we appeased Alice and stayed.

Honestly, I don't think I got over the initial shock when I heard mine and Edward's names being called for king and queen. We earned a big grin from Alice, and I think Edward wanted to hit her. I had absolutely no idea how in the hell it had happened, but apparently it did.

Since Edward and I have gone out, yeah, it turned a whole lot of heads. I don't think Forks has let it go yet. Of course it would get some kind of attention though. I was a nobody at Forks High, and then when Edward had come around and we got together, I was suddenly a somebody because Edward was. We didn't like the popularity, to be perfectly honest we ignored it and I'd forgotten about anything.

Now we were standing next to each other after leaving the stage with fucking crowns on our heads. Edward took his off and rolled his eyes before handing it over to Alice.

" No, keep it!"

" What did you do, Alice?"

" Let's just say I did not want to see Tanya or Rosalie crowned queen. And if Rosalie was crowned then Emmett would be, and with Tanya...Well, I think you still were going to be king anyways Edward. Every girl at Forks has the hots for you, and guys want to be you because of that."

" And me?" I exclaimed.

" Everybody loves you!"

I rolled my eyes and her and took my plastic tiara off. When we got to the car, Edward and I just tossed the crowns in the back and Alice and Jasper got in. The drive was long, and Alice had immediately fallen asleep on the way there. She was passed out with her head pillowed on Jaspers lap.

When we got to Jasper's house to drop him off he let Alice sleep and just kissed the top of her head, saying a quiet 'thank you' to Edward for driving him home. Edward did stop at my house really quickly. It was pitch black in the house and I stayed quiet as I went upstairs. When I got to my bedroom I grabbed the first bathing suit I saw, which was the light tan one that was bandeau styled, but had the two straps in the middle that wrapped around my neck to be a halter, with the grey/brown bottoms with the little shell designs.

I wasn't caught, but I just missed Leah coming upstairs when I went out the front door, I could hear her footsteps.

Upon reaching the Cullen's house, Edward had carried a sleepy Alice to her bedroom. She awoke when he set her down, but rolled over and closed her eyes afterwards, we just let her be. When we shut her door and headed to Edward's room, Esme and Carlisle popped out of their bedroom.

" Hello, you two. How was prom?"

" It was great. We were king and queen...Alice rigged it or something." Edward said.

Esme smiled, " That's great for both of you. I'm glad you had a great time. Do you happen to know what is wrong with Emmett? He stormed in the house without so much as one word?"

" There was some drama with Rosalie. I'm sure all will be well soon." I replied.

Carlisle sighed, " I knew that girl was trouble."

Esme quieted him and then eyed the bathing suit I had in my hands. I honestly didn't want to be the one to tell them where we were headed, because of the fact that they would probably let their mind wander on that one, but I'm pretty sure they got the idea. We talked for a short while longer before they went back to their bedroom and Edward and I headed to his room.

He let me change in his bathroom while he changed in his bedroom quickly. I wiped off my lipstick and took off my necklace and bracelet, not wanting to lose or ruin either one. I slipped my dress off and draped it over the counter, and then did my shoes. Once I was in the bathing suit I kind of felt a little self conscious about myself.

I wanted to look good for him. With a deep breath I grabbed my previous clothes and shoes and walked out of his bathroom. I didn't look around for him, but I knew he saw me. I set my dress down on his chair near the French doors that led to the ladder, and put my shoes on the ground. I stuffed my bra and underwear in my bag.

When I got the courage to stand up and turn around, I saw Edward near the end of his bed, dressed in only a pair of black board shorts.

God he looked good shirtless.

His eyes scanned all over my body, a satisfied smirk spreading over his face.

" Shall we go?"

I nodded and followed him out of his bedroom. We quietly went downstairs and Edward led me to the laundry room, and handed me a towel. He flipped on a switch near the back door and we walked outside. The lights outside were all on; near the pool, hot tub and along the house. Edward walked over to the hot tub and I looked around. It was housed under a small wooden gazebo, so that nothing could really get into the hot tub water, and it was enclosed and private. There were twinkle lights that Edward had turned on, and when he pressed a button on the side of the hot tub, it bubbled to life and lit up on the inside. While the water warmed, Edward grabbed me around the waist and leaned down. I felt his tongue flick my lip ring before his mouth was on mine and his tongue was mingling with mine.

I was deterred when something came to my mind.

Did Edward think we were going to have sex tonight? After all, it was prom...

He pulled away when my lips were unresponsive, and he looked at me worriedly.

" Is something wrong?" he asked, running his hand down my side.

" Edward...You don't...We're not..."

If I didn't confuse him enough before, now he looked completely and utterly lost.

I sighed, " You don't...think we're having sex tonight because it's prom, right?"

His eyes widened and he looked at me incredulously. I hoped it wasn't in disappointment. I didn't want to deny Edward, but I knew we weren't in that step in our relationship yet. I started to get nervous and shifty until he cupped my jaw in his hands and forced me to look at him.

Edward's beautiful green eyes bore into mine as I twisted my hands together.

" Bella, I don't expect that."

" Do you want to?" I asked out of curiosity.

He let out a nervous laugh, " Yeah, I do. Of course I do. I'm a guy...but I know that you aren't fucking ready for that or some shit."

" How is it that you can turn me into a mess of nerve's? I don't usually act like such a fucking girl." I said.

" I'm not sure…but you are a girl. That's what I like about you." He teased, nipping at my jaw.

" Look, I'm not exactly ready to do that yet. I'm not saying I will be next week, but I am not completely unwilling for…other things."

" You're trying to kill me."

I smiled and walked towards the hot tub, slowly walking up the small steps to get inside, keeping my eyes on him the entire time. I grabbed a ponytail from my wrist and tied my hair up, climbed over and stepped into the hot tub. The water was really warm and it bubbled all around me. I sunk into the water and leaned back towards the corner, crooking my finger at Edward.

If that didn't get him there fast enough I don't know what would have. He was in the water before I could blink and I laughed as the water sloshed around. Edward wrapped his arms around my waist and kissed my temple.

" You're so beautiful, and sexy." he whispered hotly in my ear.

" You're pretty sexy yourself, Mr. Masen." I replied with a smile as I leaned into him.

Edward ducked his head under quickly and came up, shaking his hair around and running his fingers through it.

" What was that for?"

" Well, I tried to gel my fucking hair back, but it wasn't having it, so all night I had gel in my hair and it makes me feel disgusting."

He dipped backwards and I massaged my fingers through his hair. Edward seemed to like that a lot because his eyes closed and he had a peaceful smile on his face. When I was finished he shook his hair out again, getting me wet in the process. I squealed and he put his arms around my shoulders.

" Don't you dare!" I yelled at him.

Before I could say anything more he submerged me and then brought me back up.

" Edward!"

He laughed loudly, " Maybe we should put that tiara back on your head, princess."

I glared at him and he winked at me.

" I really love when you try to be angry, but you actually look fucking adorable."

I sighed and he enveloped me in his arms. I rested my head on his chest and laid in his embrace, enjoying this moment with him. Eventually he turned his head towards mine and kissed me. The kiss started slowly, but it built up rather quickly.

Soon enough Edward pressed me up against the wall of the hot tub and delved his tongue into my mouth. I put my arms around his neck and pushed my chest against his. His hand moved up my side and I moaned deeply into his mouth, trying to get closer to him. I slanted my mouth over his and tangled my tongue with his, fighting for dominance. I wrapped my legs around his waist and he moved to sit on one of the corner benches. I pulled my lips from his and moved them down his neck, kissing and sucking his skin.

I heard him quietly moan my name and I continued my ministrations. My hands moved down his chest, and they disappeared under the water. I turned them to run over his hips before moving to rest them on his thighs.

He grabbed my face and pulled his lips back to mine. I kept up with his frantic, passionate pace, trying to match him.

" I think we should go upstairs." I said against his mouth, pulling away from him and getting out quickly.

Edward and I dried off quickly and before we left he turned off the hot tub lights and jets. When we got inside he turned off all the outside lights and then his lips met mine frantically. Both of us stumbled upstairs, trying to keep quiet but still somewhat failing. The moment we were in his bedroom, the door was locked and we were sailing towards the bed.

Edward's body covered mine and I felt his hands moving all over my body, just like mine over his. I arched my body up into his, trying to get closer to him. It felt like my entire body was lit on fire, and I didn't want the feeling to go away.

" Edward," I sighed, feeling his lips on my neck moving down towards my collarbone.

" We don't have to do anything." he replied in a breathy moan.

" I know. You know what I said before."

He smiled and brought his lips back to mine.

~\\~

My breath came out in short, uneven pants and I laid back on the bed, wiping the sweat from my forehead. Edward turned over, his arm extending out to wrap around my waist. His face buried in my neck, and I felt him kiss my salty skin.

" So, you never told me about that...bad experience."

I groaned, " Do we have to talk about that now?"

" Yeah, because I'm honestly curious after..."

" Ever heard of an angry dragon?"

He looked up at me, " You're fucking kidding me."

" No. After that I swore I'd never..."

He burrowed into me and kissed the side of my neck.

" I'd never do that to you. That's a dick move."

" I know."

I turned into him and pressed my body against his. Edward smiled and ran his hand down my side and over my bare hip.

I pressed my lips to his softly, reveling in the feeling of his lips on mine. He slanted his mouth over mine, our tongues meeting in a delicate dance. Hands gently caressed my back, moving slowly and sensually over my skin.

" You mean so fucking much to me. Tonight has been amazing." Edward whispered, pulling away from me.

" It has been. It feels almost unreal." I replied, brushing his hair out of his face.

Edward smiled and pulled my bare body flush to his equally as bare figure.

" It's real." he whispered in my ear, kissing my temple.

Being like him like this was new, and it wasn't like any other time I've experienced that kind of intimacy. I don't think I could even call any other times intimacy when trying to compare. With Edward it was real, it fucking meant something. In this moment it was intimate and comfortable.

He reached over me to grab the comforter that was bunched up beside me, and pulled it around us. I closed my eyes and rested my head on his chest, feeling relaxed and at peace.

**Authors Note- I know. I'm a bitch. No details. But that's how I do. Instead, I give out teasers for the next chapter for anybody who reviews. So hop to it and send me a message, a smiley face will also suffice!**

**Link for Bella and Alice's Prom dresses in the profile, you know the drill.**

**Send me a review, get a teaser! See ya'll next Friday. **

**Have a happy and safe Halloween!**


	14. Notes in Constellations

**Authors Note- Hey, guys. I know this is late, read end notes for explanation.**

**Disclaimer- S. Meyer owns all things Twilight.**

**Chapter Song: Notes in Constellations by: Chiodos**

~\\~

BPOV

~\\~

When I awoke the next morning, it was to the feeling of Edward peppering kisses all over my neck. I sighed and turned my head to the side, burying it in the pillow next to me. He kissed my lips once and I opened my eyes.

" Good morning, Angel." he murmured, his big green eyes staring into my brown ones.

Something about him seemed different, he seemed happier and lighter. I sat up in his bed slowly, holding the sheet to my chest. Edward lay across the bed, his arm was bent over by my thigh as he leaned over my legs, leaning on his side.

" Morning." I replied, my voice kind of rough.

He shifted forward and kissed my forehead. I looked up and he dipped down to kiss my lips. His hand slid from my hair and down to the back of my neck. I smiled against his lips and pulled away.

" My makeup is probably smeared everywhere." I groaned.

" You look perfect."

I smiled at him and slid out of his bed. I bent down to grab his white button up from last night and put it on to cover me. It went down to my mid-thigh, so it worked perfectly. I went into his bathroom and looked into his mirror. My eyes looked like a panda's. I grabbed my makeup bag and grabbed the make-up remover and got to work. Once my face was wiped clean of all traces of makeup, I peeked my head out of Edward's bathroom door. He was lying in bed, looking at me with the blankets all framed around him.

" Is it okay if I take a shower?"

" Of course."

I thanked him and locked the bathroom door behind me. I slipped off his button up and turned the shower on. When I stepped into his shower I sighed. It felt absolutely amazing. The warm water pelted down on me, and I felt even more relaxed. Edward had axe body wash and shampoo, but luckily I found regular dove hair and body products in there. I used the body wash and shampoo, and used just a little bit of Edward's conditioner.

Once I was finished in the shower I turned it off and wrung my hair out. Edward had towels in a small closet in the bathroom, and I ruffled my hair with it before wrapping it around my body. Once I dried off I realized that I didn't have my clothes with me.

When I opened the bathroom door and looked out, I saw Edward fast asleep on his bed, blankets kicked to the end of the bed and halfway tossed off, and he was laying naked as the day he was born. For a moment I stared at his naked form. When he shifted I quickly grabbed my clothes and went back into the bathroom to change, a small smile on my face.

I slipped on the simple white satin bra and cotton panty set, and pulled a light, loose fitted tan tank top with a pair of dark straight leg jeans and grabbed my dark blue cable knit sweater. It went down to about mid thigh and I buttoned two of the buttons and pushed the sleeves up a bit. My hair dried on its own, and didn't turn out frizzy. It fell in loose, smooth curls that hit below my shoulders.

I put on a little bit of shimmery gold eye shadow, lined my eyes with black eyeliner, swiped on some mascara and covered my face in just a simple fair colored powder to blend everything together nicely. I found a pair of white socks and put them on, and then just brushed my teeth and called it a day.

Once I put my things away and I went over to Edward's bed and he rolled over to look at me.

" You look beautiful today, as always."

I smiled, " Thank you."

" I should go shower." he said, sitting up in bed.

Edward, unembarrassed, walked to his bathroom in absolutely nothing. My eyes raked over his perfect physique and he looked back at me.

" See something you like?"

" Definitely."

He chuckled and walked into the bathroom, closing the door behind him. I fixed up his bed for him and put his suit back on the hanger for him. Once it was set in his closet, I decided to head downstairs. It was quiet and empty, not a soul there.

I went into the kitchen and started a pot of coffee, hoping that it was okay. I looked into the fridge for creamer, and holy fuck. They had every flavor from Chocolate Raspberry to Caramel Macchiato. I grabbed the Hazelnut Latte flavor and went on a hunt for sugar. I found it in the cabinet next to the bowls and plates and set it on the counter.

Once the pot was filled I poured a steaming cup. I added Hazelnut creamer and a little sugar into the cup.

" I see you've made yourself perfectly at home."

Edward's voice startled me and I turned around, " I hope it's o-"

" You don't have to ask, ever."

I smiled and watched as Edward poured himself a cup of coffee, and put some Chocolate Raspberry creamer in his coffee. Afterwards he was eyeing the muffins on the counter.

" Double chocolate chip muffins. Nice."

Edward pushed a muffin into my hands and started taking bites into one himself. When I actually tasted it, it was absolutely amazing. Esme definitely could not only cook, but her baking skills were great.

We sat at the kitchen table and sipped our coffee slowly, munching on the muffins.

" Do you think anybody is wondering where you are?"

I shrugged, " Probably not."

He nodded and finished eating his muffin, taking periodic sips from his coffee cup.

" But I should go home...I'll probably hang out with Jess or Angela."

" Good. I don't want to be monopolizing you constantly."

" I don't mind it."

Edward smiled, " I know."

~\\~

I leaned against Angela's headboard next to Jess, reaching for the popcorn that was planted in my lap. Angela's eyes were glued to the television, and Jess was shaking beside me. We were watching The Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning. Suddenly Angela screamed next to me when the character Hoyt shoved a knife into Eric's mouth but didn't exactly kill him.

" Oh my god! He's coughing blood!...Not a nightstick, holy jesus christ!" Jess yelled, gripping my arm tightly as the character was beaten with a nightstick.

I rolled my eyes at them and took another handful of popcorn to shove into my mouth.

Once the movie was finish Angela scrambled up to turn on the bedroom light. My eyes blinked to adjust to the sudden light and I rubbed my eyes.

" Never again! Bella, you pick the worst movies!"

I laughed, " It wasn't that bad, guys."

" Not that bad! I can't sleep tonight, no way. Lights on." Jess screeched, tossing one of Angela's pink pillows at me.

Angela's bedroom walls are hot pink, with a dresser, TV stand and end tables in white wood, along with a desk that holds her school books and computer. Her floors are white carpeting, and so is her bed, but with hot pink pillows. Her room is mostly white, but with flashes of hot pinks everywhere, and a little bit of green. It was the typical teenage girl bedroom.

" Oh, whatever. I'm going to go change."

I went to the bathroom and changed into a pair of shorts and a tank top, folding up my previous clothes. After brushing my teeth and tossing my hair into a ponytail I went back to Angela's room. They were curled up on her bed already in their pajamas. Jess grabbed my phone and snapped a picture of me as I bent over to put my other clothes in my bag.

" Look at that ass! Let's send that to Edward!"

" Why send him something he's already seen?"

" Ow! Ow!"

I laughed and sat at the edge of Angela's bed.

" So, I totally didn't tell you guys, but last weekend I kinda hooked up with someone." Jess blurted out.

My eyes bugged out, " What?"

" Yeah, but I didn't want to say anything because it was a total drunken accident. And I didn't want Bella to freak at me."

" Why would I freak at you, I just want to know who it was." I replied as Angela nodded eagerly at her.

The next words completely shocked me right to my core.

" It was James Grahm."

" WHAT?"

" Who's that?...Wait, is that the guy Bella hangs with to smoke and whatever."

" Yeah..."

I stared at Jess, " Please tell me you are kidding, seriously. Jess, he's been seeing this girl for awhile on and off."

" I know, I know! He told me about it, and I totally was just over it. It's not like I'm a virgin, guys."

" We all know that." Angela replied as Jess slapped her arm.

" Hey, you aren't so innocent daughter of a priest." Jess retorted.

" Shut up!"

" Has someone been keeping secrets?" I asked Angela as she blushed and looked away.

" You didn't tell her! Bella, it was like a break-through!" Jess exclaimed.

" You and Ben had sex?"

" No! No! We just...explored." she said, clearly very embarrassed.

" Hey, don't be embarrassed. I did a little exploring this weekend."

" Hold up, you haven't done it with Edward yet?" Angela asked, surprised,

" I thought you guys would be going at it like crazy by now. You're always together." Jess finished

I rolled my eyes at both of them, but obviously they thought they had a fucking reason to think that.

" Oh, thanks, guys. I'm not a slut!"

Angela and Jess rolled their eyes at me. " We know that!"

" You guys just seem to be very...in tune with each other. And you're always sneaking off during lunch to do god knows what."

" Seriously? We go out to smoke, and sometimes make out, but we don't do that!"

" Ben and I made out in the janitors closet once. Total cliché but it was so hot." Angela said.

Jess nodded, " Oh, yeah. Mike Newton and me in there...He might be a total jackass now but it was pretty great. You'd better have some janitor's closet fun with Edward before he graduates."

I smiled and shook my head at them, " I'll make sure to do that, guys."

We spent the rest of the night talking, doing nails and watched more movies. Of course they didn't let me pick any, so they were all romantic comedy movies, but I was alright with that. At the end of the night we all passed out on Angela's bed with the television still going and popcorn on the bed.

It was nice to have a girls night. I felt like I hadn't seen them in a long time. Even though I enjoyed my time with Edward it was nice to have one of these nights every once in awhile.

~\\~

" Angela, please get your hand off my boob."

" Then get your face out of my neck."

" I would put Jess is taking up the bed entirely."

" Ughh, chocolate and popcorn hangover."

I groaned and shoved Jess away from me. Angela flipped onto her side and tucked the blanket around herself. I closed my eyes and buried my head into the pillow. It was a blissful ten minutes until Angela's bedroom door had opened up and a very enthusiastic mother came bounding through, way too cheery for my liking.

" Come on, girls. It's time to get up; I made breakfast!"

" Mom, really?" Angela whined in response to her.

Her mom snickered, " Yes, dear. So get up and come downstairs."

The door closed and I crawled out of bed with my eyes still closed. " I'm hungry."

Jess sat up. " Me, too."

" Later." Angela said, wrapping herself into her covers and plopping down in the middle of her bed.

I grabbed a sweatshirt and tossed it on over my tank top before stumbling downstairs next to Jess. When we got downstairs all I saw was bacon, scrambled eggs, hash browns, pancakes, waffles, toast and biscuits and butter. Finishing it off much to my satisfaction was coffee.

" I love you so much Mrs. Weber."

" Oh, call me Anne. You both know that!"

I smiled and took a plate from the counter, loading it up high with food. Once I was seated with my coffee, I was digging in right away and ready to eat. Jess excused herself to the washroom really quickly and Angela's mom sat down across from me.

" I feel like I haven't seen you in forever. How's home, sweetheart?"

She knew all about my home situation. When it had happened, I spent a lot of time either with James, or here with Angela. And I knew my mother had talked with Anne, and still does periodically. When my mother wasn't here for me, she was. So I was grateful for that. Anne was easy to talk to, and always so nice; as is Angela's dad. They were like a second family to me.

" It's...as usual." I replied.

She gave me a sympathetic look and patted my hand, " If you ever need anything just tell me."

" I know. Thank you so much, I appreciate it."

" What're we talking about?" Jess asked.

Anne smiled, " Nothing, get to eating, kids!"

Jess didn't say anything else, just started eating and talking between bites. Everything tasted fantastic as always. Eventually the twins came down and ate with us, and when we got back upstairs after cleaning up after ourselves Angela was still passed out on her bed, but got up a few minutes of us shuffling around her bedroom.

I felt like I didn't spend enough time with my friends, and I would try to put in more of an effort to spend time with them, especially because I would be graduating this August and they would be busy once school started for them, and I was going to be picking up more hours if I could at the diner.

We spent the rest of the day around Forks and went to Port Angeles for a bit, even though it was only ditch day for people who went to prom, they had ditched anyways. We ate breakfast at a sandwich shop, and we were all back at our homes by the time dinner had come around. Nobody was home when I got home, so I just fended for myself. I knew Leah probably went with Janie to her house, the boys were doing something, Charlie was working, and Sue was probably out shopping for something.

I went upstairs, feeling like I hadn't been home in awhile, but yesterday I had stopped over for just a few minutes. I wanted to sleep in my own bed tonight for once. When I sunk into the mattress I passed out immediately. I distantly heard my cell phone go off but I ignored it and drifted off.

I awoke later on when I saw the clock said it was ten at night. I sat up and rubbed my eyes roughly, trying to wake myself up a bit. I checked my phone and saw that I had a missed call from Edward so I called it back.

" Hey, you. I called earlier."

" I know. I got home and just kinda crashed for a bit, just got up. Everything okay?"

" Yeah. I just hadn't heard from you since I saw you yesterday morning, and I just wanted to talk to you."

" Miss me?"

" Incredibly so."

" I'll see you in the morning." I told him quietly, rolling onto my back.

" I know, Angel."

" No need to miss me."

" I miss your lips."

I hummed into the phone, " Oh, yeah?"

" Yeah. Right down to that lip ring of yours. So fucking sexy."

I giggled, " Same goes for you."

He moaned into the phone, " I'd better go before this progresses. I'll see you tomorrow morning, alright?"

" Of course. Goodnight, Edward."

" Goodnight, my Angel."

~\\~

When I awoke in the morning, I could feel a sudden chill in my bedroom. Upon opening up my window I could feel that a rush of cold had hit Forks today. I showered and changed into a black thermal with white strips, straight leg dark wash jeans, and my red converse. I blow dried my hair, curled it, and last minute decided to just toss it up. I did my makeup a little bit darker today, thicker liner, and finished off my outfit with a turquoise chunky necklace on a gold chain.

Downstairs, it was still dead around here. I sighed and poured some coffee, drowning myself in it until I heard a quiet knock on the front door. After putting my cup into the sink, I opened up the front door and there stood Edward.

" Hey, you."

" Hey." I replied, leaning into him with my arms around his middle.

Edward leaned down to kiss me, his lips consuming mine completely. I sighed into his mouth and felt his tongue smooth over my piercing before pulling away.

" I missed you."

" You, too." I murmured, leaning into him for just a moment before pulling away.

" We'd better go."

" Everything okay?" he asked.

I nodded, " Yeah. Everything is just fine."

Edward gave me a small smile and grabbed my hand in his, leading me out towards his car.

" Are you sure?"

I looked straight into his beautiful, bright emerald eyes and smiled sincerely at him.

" Everything is perfect."

~\\~

May 22nd

2007

Tuesday

~\\~

I felt two arms wrap tightly around my waist and I squealed loudly in surprise, but smiled immediately upon seeing Edward. He lifted me up in his arms and I felt like I was a hundred feet from the ground.

" You're done!" I exclaimed, turning my head around to kiss him.

" And you're almost done." he replied, returning my kiss.

" I cannot wait to party tonight. I feel like I haven't in so long."

" Oh, yeah?"

" Yes. I'm going to look hot tonight."

" You always look hot, and sexy, and beautiful."

" Remind me to wear one of my corsets tonight."

" Don't tease me."

He carried me off to his car and set me on the hood as we waited for Alice. She was riding with us today so we had to wait for her to get here; and generally she is a social butterfly and talks to everyone. I stared up at him and he smiled down at me, holding both of my hands in his.

Edward leaned his forehead against mine and his smile widened even further.

I met his eyes and grinned, " You're smile is really cheesy."

" Oh, yeah?"

His fingers ran through my hair and twisted the ends before moving back to hold my hands.

" So, you get to meet my dad in like ten days."

" Really? Is he staying longer than graduation?"

" He's actually planning on staying a week."

Edward seemed so happy talking about his father being here. I knew that he missed him, and he always told me that he did. I knew what it felt like, with my mom all the way in Florida; it definitely can suck. But seeing how excited Edward is really makes me happy for him. He fucking deserved something good in his life. Right now, I was trying to be that for him.

" That's good. I'm glad you get to see him."

" He's going to absolutely adore you."

I blushed, and Edward chuckled. " Adore?"

" Yes. He will adore you, just like I do, beautiful girl."

" We'll see."

" Bella! Hey! I was just in the office and they were giving out all of the prom photos!"

" Prom photo's? We didn't..."

Edward was smiling wickedly as he grabbed the white packet from Alice's hands.

" Edward did! I picked them up for you guys. They are just a bunch of stills, but they are done professionally! Let me look, too!"

Once the pictures were slipped out of the white packet, he started to leaf through them. There were many different pictures of us in different sizes. They absolutely took my breath away. Some were of us dancing, just smiling at each other, sitting at the table, but most were close-ups, laughing, being crowned king and queen, but the last one was when we were sitting outside in the chair looking over the beach, and when we were on the beach with Edward's arms wrapped around me.

" Oh my god! You guys look so beautiful together!" Alice exclaimed.

Edward stared at a picture of when we had been dancing. He was staring down at me, while I looked at up at him. My arms around his neck, his around my waist. My hair looked perfect, and I looked pretty, but Edward looked absolutely gorgeous.

" I love this picture. You look so fucking break-taking."

" I like this one!" Alice plucked out the picture of us up-close and we were laughing and smiling, looking deliriously happy.

" They all look great."

I leaned into Edward, " They do."

" And you look the best in all of them. You do a fantastic job of making me look ugly."

" I was thinking the exact opposite."

He rolled his eyes and grabbed my wrists to pull me off the car. I landed on my feet safely and got into the car. Alice was chatting happily about summer, and I could tell that she was definitely looking forward to it. I was looking forward to it also, at least, after my summer school classes. My classes started on June 11th, and would go all the way to the 9th of July, weekends off.

They both were different times. My first class was going to be Advanced Physics from seven to eleven thirty, and the second one if from twelve to three and that would be Senior AP World History. It would definitely suck being at school for that long, but I was hoping it wouldn't be too grueling. Four and a half hours of Advanced Physics was definitely doing to be a little challenging and grueling.

Edward dropped me off at home, and then headed home himself. I sat outside on the porch and had a quick smoke before heading inside. Leah was already there, prancing around the house happy because school is over. I grabbed water from the fridge and went upstairs, shoving my bag on the floor before flopping down on my bed.

I had to get ready for James' party early because I promised to help him out. I got into the shower and cleaned up and then got dressed quickly. As I leafed through my drawer I found my black corset. Black ribbons weaved though the fabric on the sides with bows on the button, zip's upfront with ten small metal rings along it with a sweetheart neck line

I considered skinny jeans, but since the weather has been getting warm, I grabbed a pair of dark grey, almost black, shorts with a worn hole on the left thigh and a belt. I put on a black gothic drop necklace, silver fringe drop earrings and gold sequin open toed pumps. My makeup was dark purple eye shadow, lined with black eye linger and a thick coating of mascara on my eyelashes.

Before leaving I'd painted my nails a dark purple and put on a little bit of red lipstick. My hair was curled and a little wilder than normal, but this was how I always did it for these kinds of parties.

It's a last day of school party, and it's at James' house, it's been wild without fail every year.

I covered my corset with a hoodie and grabbed my car keys, phone and cigarette's.

It was already five, and I really had to get going. Sue was home, and she had wanted to know where I was headed, I just told her I was going to a party and gave no more details then that. Last thing I needed was to hear her blabbing off to my fucking father.

When I arrived at James' house he was opening up chip bags. I went downstairs really quickly and put all my things on his couch, along with my hoodie. The corset was tight around my thin waist, and it pushed my breasts up just perfectly.

" Holy fuck. Edward is going to bust a nut."

I rolled my eyes and grabbed Hawaiian punch from the fridge. I knew it was going to be spiked later, but I made it anyways. I poured in some of the punch, sprite, and orange sherbet and mixed it all together with a few ice cubes.

I set out all of the other liter bottles, a few cases of beer and set out red cups in five tall stacks, along with napkins. There were five different kinds of chips, and a huge fucking bowl of random candy. Chip dip was also set out, and he got store bought cheese popcorn and kettle corn.

As I was bending down in the fridge to grab the case of mikes hard lemonade, I felt a sharp sting on my ass from a hard slap.

" Who's that sexy girl bent over?"

" Your girlfriend, ass smacker."

I stood up and turned towards Edward, my eyes raking over his low slung dark wash jeans and white v-neck and a black button up over it. He always looked good, even as simple as his clothes might be; he always somehow made it look absolutely fantastic.

" My very sexy, sexy girlfriend." he said, skimming his finger across my chest.

I shivered and pulled away, grabbing the case of mike's hard lemonade. I gave two packs to Edward and took two myself as we headed back inside to put them underneath the snack table.

" Hey, man. What's going on?" James said upon seeing Edward, giving him one of those man-hug things.

" Nothing much. Looking forward to tonight."

" Fuck yeah, so am I. Haven't partied good in forever."

" Well, get ready, man. Tonight is going to be good."

**Authors Note- I know this is late, for that; I apologize.**

**Over the past month or so there has been an illness in a family member, and it's taken a toll on myself and my time for fanfiction. Updates might be a little sketchy, but I will try to get them out ASAP. I will update as regularly as I possibly can; but I need understanding.**

**Outfits are in the profile; you know the drill.**

**Reviewers get teasers for chapter 15!**


	15. Til The World Ends

**Authors Note- Read on.**

**Disclaimer- S. Meyer owns all things Twilight.**

**Chapter Song – Til The World Ends by: Britney Spears**

~\\~

BPOV

~\\~

Two hours later at eight thirty, the party was completely in full swing. Most seniors were here, some juniors, and I saw a few sophomores here, but not many had shown up, at least, they aren't here if James can help it.

Half of the people were already high or off their ass drunk within an hour, and others were dancing and basically going at it in the middle of James' living room. I grabbed a cranberry mikes hard and felt Edward come up behind me and reach for a Corona.

" You're giving these guys a show by bending over like that."

" I bet I am."

He pulled me back against him and I stood up straight.

" That ass belongs to me. And so does this gorgeous body."

His hand ran down my side slowly, running over my curves and stopping at my hip to grip it. I smiled and leaned back into him, turning my head to the side to kiss him. His other hand moved up my stomach but I stopped it because I knew what he was planning on going for.

" No grabbing my boob."

" I'll do whatever I want." he stated, doing just that.

I shoved his hand off playfully, " Later."

We went back into the living room and he put his arm around my waist and pushed his hips against mine, rocking us side to side to the thrumming beat. I took a sip of my bottle and moved with him slowly.

" Enjoying yourself?" I asked, full well knowing that I could _feel _him enjoying himself.

He pinned his hips to mine and nodded slowly, his piercing green eyes never leaving mine. We kept up our rocking from side to side until his and my bottle was empty. I looked over and saw, as usual, James making out with Victoria against the wall near his television. I rolled my eyes and heard Edward laughing beside me.

" He needs to figure out what he wants."

" This is James we are talking about. Hey, I never told you; he hooked up with my friend Jess."

" Jessica Stanley? Are you serious?"

" Oh, yeah. The day after I slept over at your house she told me when I was at Angela's."

Edward chuckled once more, " She's not a clinger?"

" Not really. She understood it was just a one night stand."

" Good. At least James has to deal with one last issue."

" Hey, Jess is nice." I defended.

" Yeah, really, really nice."

I rolled my eyes, " I get it."

He took something out of his pocket and held it between us. It was a blunt; I looked up at him with a wicked grin and grabbed a lighter from my pocket. I lit it up and he brought it up to his lips and took a deep drag, holding the smoke in his lungs. Edward leaned forward and I opened my mouth as he released the smoke into it slowly.

We did almost two blunts, which did us in just a little bit. Generally we need a few to get us completely off the wagon since we've done it for awhile, but this felt perfect. Edward kept his arm around me tightly, that is, until he ran to the bathroom downstairs really quick.

Suddenly I felt someone come up behind me, placing their hands on my hips. I immediately spun around and saw Mike Newton. His hands dropped and he gave me a have smirk, have predatory smile.

" Hey, Bella."

" Hi, Mike."

" Having fun."

" Uh, yeah. You?"

" Kinda. It would be better if you danced with me."

I shifted my eyes around the room, really just wanting to run out of there at this very moment, but apparently Mike was going to be persistent in this one. " I don't really dance, Mike."

" You were dancing with Edward Masen." he argued.

I sighed deeply, " He's my boyfriend."

A creepy smile spread over his face. " I know that...But I also know the way you look at me in the halls. And how you act during gym. You like me, Bella, and I'm pretty into you, too. You're so hot. Seeing you in that little outfit just...gets me going."

I think I might be sick.

He leaned forward to kiss me and I put my hands on his chest and gave him a shove back. He stumbled into a surprised Edward, who shoved him forward off of him.

" What the fuck do you think you are doing, Newton." I heard Edward say.

I grabbed onto Edward's forearm. " It's not worth it."

" Keep your disgusting lips away from my girlfriend. You here me?"

Mike was running in the other direction faster than I could even process Edward's words myself. He wrapped his arms around me tightly and pulled me against him. I leaned into him and giggled.

" So tough."

" I'm just doing my job."

As the night progressed and only got crazier, Edward and I only got drunk. We had completely let loose, and it felt so damn good to do it.

By nine forty five Edward was sitting on James' leather couch, and I found myself in his lap making out with him in front of everybody else. His lips were all over my mouth and neck, along with his tongue. I was returning his passion equally with mine.

I felt his hand touch my chest, and his other hand touch my side over the corset. My knees were on either side of him, and my hips were against his. I moved down on his lap and he groaned deeply into my mouth. I put my arms around his neck and slanted my mouth over his, twirling my tongue with his and fighting for dominance. He pulled away and I felt his lips on my neck, sucking, biting and licking the skin there. I tugged at his hair and moaned, pushing myself impossibly closer. The feel of his hands on my body left a trail of fire. My fingers threaded through his hair, the silky bronze soft and lush.

I knew he loved it when I tugged on his hair. He bit my bottom lip, sucking it into his mouth and laving it with his tongue.

" God, you're so sexy." Edward groaned before pulling his lips back to mine.

The heat of his body against mine was almost too much. I could feel and sense how much he wanted me and I wished that I could find somewhere to have my way with him. My thoughts were clouded with only thoughts of Edward, and the feel of his lips on mine and his tongue in my mouth. I didn't want anything more than him right now.

" Bella?"

I pulled back from Edward and turned around, seeing Leah with Janie and her other friend Kim next to her.

" What are you doing here?"

" Are you drunk?"

" Leah, what the fuck are you doing here? You shouldn't be here."

" Why not? There are plenty of sophomores here. And holy hell, what are you wearing?"

I shakily stood up on my feet and looked at her.

" You guys need to leave."

" But you're allowed to come here."

" Yeah, because I'm going to be eighteen at the end of summer and James is my friend."

" I'm not leaving."

" Fine. But I don't want to see you getting high or drinking, and watch who you talk to. Keep your friends with you, okay?"

She rolled her eyes before walking off, " Have fun sucking face with your boyfriend."

Edward pulled me down on top of him and I squealed and landed on him, making sure to catch myself so that I wouldn't hit him. He put his arms around my neck and pulled me back in towards him.

" I hate being interrupted." He complained in my ear.

" I know, baby." I replied, pressing my lips to his once again.

" Let's go in the basement."

He helped me off my feet and we worked our way through dancing bodies and opened up the basement door, as we were walking down, I could hear loud moaning and shifting. Edward and I froze and he then collapsed down onto the stairs and started laughing hysterically.

" What the fuck? Edward, Bella?"

I found myself starting to laugh with Edward, leaning into his side with my face hidden in his chest.

" Get the fuck out, guys!"

I gasped for breath as I tried to stand, grabbing Edward's hand and tugging on it to get him up. No way was I going to stay down here and listen to James going at it. Edward was still laughing like crazy as he got up and we stumbled back up the stairs. I ran into someone who was holding beer and dodged it as it spilled on the floor. Whoever the person was, they shouted profanities at me as I struggled to catch my breath.

Edward pulled me back and lead me back towards the couch we'd been on just a few moments ago. He started to kiss me, resuming our previous kiss and I melted into him, smiling against his lips before he pulled away.

" I'm going to get some water. Want anything, Angel?"

" No, I'm okay."

He stood up and headed towards the kitchen. The moment he was out of view I saw Mike Newton in front of me, holding out a red cup towards me. I leaned back into the couch, wondering if he thought that I was that big of an idiot to take that cup from him.

" Didn't Edward and I make it clear, Mike."

" I was just getting you a drink, Bella. That's all."

" Yeah, a drink laced with something. Didn't I fucking tell you to leave my girl alone?" an angry voice sneared.

Edward grabbed the front of Mike's shirt, and I saw fear in his features as Edward stared down at him, towering over him. Edward is about a foot taller than Mike; and his height makes him a pretty intimidating person. Mike looked like he wanted to piss his pants.

" Last fucking warning, Newton. Stay the fuck away from her. If I see you near her, you won't know what the fuck is coming towards you."

He pushed Newton away and he stumbled back before darting away, seeming to be truly done trying. Edward sat down next to me and handed me his bottle of water, I took a sip before handing it over to him. He downed half the bottle in about two seconds and set it down. I leaned into him and he wrapped his arm around my waist securely, kissing my forehead gently.

" You okay?"

I nodded, " Yeah. Thanks."

" Of course."

The rest of the night basically went how it had before. More dancing, more drinking, more blunts and plenty of kissing to get both of us to the brink of sneaking upstairs for a little bit of extra party fun, but we resisted on that and settled for hot dancing. Edward apparently is a huge fan of grinding, and I was definitely going to be down for that.

" Stop being so tall." I whined as I moved against him.

" Stop being so short."

" I have heals on."

He wrapped his arm around my waist and leaned down to kiss me. It was all teeth and tongue. Our bodies continued to move, and I really wanted to drag him elsewhere and have my way with him. His body was warm against mine, and I could feel a thin sheet of sweat on his neck. I moaned into his mouth and wrapped my legs around his waist as he pushed me up against the wall in the living room.

" I'm going to strip you down right here if we don't get any privacy in the next minute."

" There's nowhere to go." I whined, pressing my lips back to his.

Edward kept me firmly to his and started towards the basement.

" James is down there!"

" He's not. I saw him up here a few minutes ago. Trust me I'm not that drunk."

We raced down the stairs in a stumbling, lusty mess and fell on top of the couch in a heap together. The only noise in the air was the music from upstairs, and it was loud enough for nobody to hear anything. The couch was a little bit difficult, but there was no way I would touch that bed after what James was doing in it just a few minutes ago.

Edward wrestled his shirt off and I frantically unzipped my corset down the front.

" Hey, hey! None of that get upstairs. You can do that at someone else's house later." James suddenly shouted

" Either you get the fuck out of here or we'll give you a goddamn show."

The steps up the stairs were the quickest I've ever heard them.

~\\~

" No, no, way! I'd rather share the couch with Edward. I am not taking that bed tonight after what you did in there, Jamie!"

" You're drunk, why do you care?"

" Because!"

" Fine, goddammit! I'll change the sheets princess. I'd give you the guest room but...Yeah..."

I heard a crash from upstairs.

" Fuck!" James shouted, " Guys, I've got to get up there. Edward, sheets are in my closet, okay? Get drunky into bed."

" Edward, I want another beer."

" No, Angel. No more. Do you want some water?'

" Sure. I'll go get it."

He looked hesitant and I waved him off. " I'm fine."

I tripped over the recliner and Edward rolled his eyes, " Yeah, okay."

" I'll be right back. Don't get in bed without me."

" I wouldn't dream of it, babe."

I stumbled my way up the stairs, deciding to get myself a beer instead. I could get whatever I wanted if he wasn't with me. I tripped up the stairs and got into the kitchen. I found Leah there, and she was drinking water. When she saw me, her eyes slightly widened.

" Whoa, what happened to you?"

I grabbed a beer and popped it open, take a long drink.

" Fooling around."

Word vomit.

" Too much info!"

" I didn't mean like that! Okay, maybe just a little bit. Just...don't do what I do, okay?" I slurred.

" What are you talking about. Don't do what you do?"

" Don't fool around with guys at your age, get drunk, or get high. It's fun, but you're better than that." I whispered.

" You're high right now?" she exclaimed.

" Shhh, don't tell, okay? My non-dad might think I'm more of a fuck up."

I heard loud footsteps behind me and I turned around and saw Edward, I held up my beer towards him before taking a long gulp from the bottle. He pulled it away from me and set it on the counter.

" Stop ruining my fun!"

" I need to get you into bed, crazy girl."

He lifted me up into his arms and I squealed loudly, " Round two?" I asked, pressing my lips to his.

" Shh, Bella." he hushed as he started to leave the kitchen, telling Leah to dump the remains of the beer out in the sink. I whined and he just chuckled at me.

When we got downstairs he put me on the clean bed, new linens. I laid down and started to take off my corset.

" As much as I would love to have some more fun with you tonight, you need to sleep it off."

" One more blunt? Please?" I begged.

" No, Bella."

" Please, Edward. Please, please. Just half, it will help me calm down."

He groaned and reached into his pocket and took one out. After he lit it up he handed it to me.

" Half, that's it."

I took in a deep drag and moaned as I did. Edward took off his black button up and set it next to me and slipped his shoes off. He took the blunt away from me once it was halfway gone and I sat up.

" I can't sleep in this." I complained as I started to unzip the corset from down the middle.

" I know, Angel."

Once it was off he grabbed his button up that he'd taken off and helped me slip it on. He buttoned all of them and it hit about mid thigh, and it was only slightly floaty around my waist. I never joked when I said Edward was as skinny as me.

I slipped off my heels and took off my shorts before slipping into the bed.

Edward took his jeans off and slipped in beside me. He wrapped his arms around my waist and kissed the back of my neck.

" I'm not sleepy." I told him, rolling around to face him.

" Yes, you are."

" No."

" Can you please cuddle with me, Angel? I want to lay down with you." he asked sweetly, kissing my lips softly.

I hummed against his mouth and nodded, " Fine."

I wrapped my arms around his waist tightly and buried my face in his chest, moving my hand down to graze his ass. He laughed and let me grope him without complaining.

Fuck, he's such an amazing boyfriend...

~\\~

" Oh fuck."

I jumped out of bed quickly; shoving Edward's arms off of me and ran to the bathroom. My entire stomach's contents emptied in the toilet, and my head was fucking pounding terribly. I bent over the toilet and my stomach heaved violently.

It felt like it was turning upside down and inside out. My throat was burning, and I knew that I shouldn't have had those shots and all that beer. Getting high off my ass also didn't help the situation much at all.

" Holy fuck. Bella, are you okay? You're fucking white as a goddamn ghost."

" I'm fi-"

Apparently my mouth was a fucking faucet now.

Edward kneeled behind me and held my hair back as I gripped the sides of the toilet and heaved forward once more. He kissed the back of my neck once and whispered soothingly into my ear.

My face was wet from the tears that came out from getting sick so much.

I was in the bathroom for about an hour until I was emptied out. I grabbed an unused toothbrush from the cabinet in the bathroom and brushed my teeth thoroughly, but slowly. Edward carried me bridal style back to the bed and held me in his arms as he leaned against the headboard. I rested my head on his shoulder, my body shaking from all the sickness.

" Calm down, sweetheart."

He rubbed my back gently and kissed the top of my head. I closed my eyes and relaxed into him, taking deep breaths. Eventually my body completely went slack and I was asleep, warm, and safe and comforted in Edward's arms.

~\\~

I awoke what felt like the early afternoon. Edward was slightly elevated against the headboard, but luckily the pillows were behind him so it wasn't too unbearable. I was curled up in his arms, and I sighed deeply, my body feeling limp as I moved around.

" Hey, you. How are you feeling?" Edward asked as he sat up, groaning.

" Okay. Are you okay?"

He moved me out of his lap and laid across the bed with a deep groan.

" Hey! I'm coming down here, so get your damn clothes on."

" We already have them on."

He appeared and Edward pulled me to his side to hold me.

" How cute."

" Shut up."

" I'm just fucking with you guys. Rough night?"

" Ask Ms. Barf-a-lot." Edward answered.

I slapped his chest and moved away from him, " Jerk."

" Ah, yeah, probably should have warned you. I can't count how many times I've held her hair back. I finally just bought her a fucking pack of those hair ties. They are in the drawer, just so you know for next time, dude."

" No thanks. I'm not the asshole that leaves a sick girl in the bathroom to throw up for an hour while I try to sleep."

James rolled his eyes, " Whatever."

" I work later. Fuck my life." I whined, laying on my stomach.

Suddenly I felt two arms wrap around me and lift me up.

" Hey! Leave me be."

He stood me up on my feet and I hunched over, glaring at him. Edward was watching James closely, I could tell; he didn't like when James would try and mess around with me, even if it was just friendly. He has a possessive side no matter who it is.

" Edward, stop glaring at me like I'm the cause for cancer."

" Then get your hands off my girl."

James wrapped his arms around my waist from behind and put his chin on my shoulder.

" She was mine before she was yours, buddy."

" Yeah, as a friend. Let her alone."

I shrugged James off. " You know he doesn't like it; just let it be, okay? I don't want to fight. Does anybody want something to drink, I'm dying?"

" Water. Thanks." James said as I stumbled my way upstairs. His parents weren't home until tonight, so I was able to get into the kitchen unseen to grab two bottles of water. When I was heading back downstairs I could hear Edward and James getting into it over me.

" I'm not her fucking body guard, dude. You know how I get; I can't help it when it comes to her. I just...can't, alright?"

" She's my friend, Edward. We fucking fool around and act like friends do. I wouldn't take her from you like that. She sees me as a brother."

" But what do you see her as?"

" Look, she's my friend, okay? F-R-I-E-N-D. That's it. No need to get your fucking boxers in a twist."

I started walking down the sound, making noise to alert my presence and I tossed a water bottle to James before laying down over the couch and chugging the bottle down in about a minute. My throat felt ten times better and I let out a small belch.

" I should get home soon. I want to get to work early to discuss my schedule."

" Why?"

" I decided to just see if I can open on Sunday's and work until one like I do on Saturdays, and eliminating Wednesday for extra study time on those days since I have limited study time. And work maybe Monday and Tuesday maybe from four to close. Therefore I work those four days, and I have also Friday nights off."

" Sounds like fun. Will you still have time in that busy schedule to spend time with me?" Edward asked.

" I'll try to fit you in."

He smiled at me from across the room and I got up and grabbed my shorts, slipping them on. I couldn't even see them; Edward's shirt was long enough to cover them.

I went to the bathroom and put the corset back on, Edward said I could keep his shirt to put over it. I put my hair up in a ponytail and walked back out to grab my heels. Once they were on I grabbed my keys.

" I'd better head out."

" I'll walk you out." Edward said, already ready to go.

We said goodbye to James, thanked him and then headed out to the driveway. Edward gave me a long, deep kiss as I was pressed against the driver door of my car, and released me quickly so I wouldn't get soaked by the rain.

He smiled at me as he slipped into his car, and I'd never felt so lucky.

~\\~

As I finished putting my outfit on before heading to work, Leah came into my room; looking awfully tired. I remember seeing her last night, but the events were still pretty blurry. I hoped she was alright last night and nothing had happened.

" Hey. You look tired." she noted.

" Yeah, you, too. Everything okay last night? Nothing happened?"

She rolled her eyes, " Yeah. And you were pretty out of it last night."

" I'm sorry you saw that."

" It's cool. I mean, I don't mind seeing my step sister almost having sex with her boyfriend on a couch, or smoking blunts and getting super high; oh, and getting completely drunk."

" Leah..."

" I'm sorry, that kind of sounded mean. But why do you get like that? I mean, it can't be that fun."

" You don't understand, okay."

" I don't?"

" No."

" Then tell me."

" You know what it's like for me. You see it. And getting high, getting drunk or being with Edward makes it go away. Even if it's just for a little while."

" That's not healthy, Bella."

I sighed, " I know. But once I move out of here I'll be better."

" Are you sure about that?"

" Yeah...I mean, Edward is going to Juilliard in the fall, and I'll do whatever it takes to get into Columbia. We'll be together if everything works out.

" You think it will work out like that?"

" Whatever happens, happens, alright? Right now, I'll deal with shit the way I do. And you can tell whoever but it won't make a difference."

" I wasn't going to say anything."

" Yeah, well, it happens."

Leah left the room soon afterwards and I slipped my hoodie on and grabbed my keys.

When I got to the diner, I was able to talk to Charlotte immediately about my schedule I requested. She said that it definitely sounded like it could work, but she would have to talk to Bree and Jasper about it because it conflicts their schedules and they had to be alright with it. I hoped it wouldn't be a big deal and that it would work out. By the time summer school classes were over in July all of our schedules were going to change, and then by the time school came around they would have to be adjusted once more to fit school schedule.

I worked a little bit later tonight before heading home and crashing into my bed right when I walked through the door. I'd eat dinner at the diner already. It was surprisingly a really busy Wednesday there for some reason, and I was the only waitress there today, Charlotte helped where she could but she was busy cooking up a storm in the kitchen. But, I had made a lot of tips and happily deposited it into the bank before heading home.

I awoke very suddenly to the sound of a tapping on my window. My eyes opened, and the room was pitch black. I let my eyes adjust, and then heard yet another tap. I knew it wasn't the branches, because then I would hear the wind outside whipping it against my window. When I sat up and turned my head around, there was Edward; sitting on a fucking branch in the tree outside my window.

Quickly I got up and unlocked and pushed the window up. He slide through the window and stepped gracefully and quietly into my bedroom. I shut the window and shivered at the cool air that hit my skin. A few droplets fell on the floor from the light drizzle outside that had gotten Edward wet.

He ran his hand through his hair and looked down at me.

" What are you doing here?" I asked him.

" I couldn't really sleep, and I figured I could crash with you for the night. I mean, I know we spent last night together; but it's fucking awesome sleeping with you."

He looked so hopeful and sweet that I just couldn't tell him it wasn't a good idea.

" Okay."

" Why are you still fully dressed, Angel?"

" I crashed after work." I told him, reaching into my drawers to grab something while he slipped his jacket and shoes off.

Edward nodded and I grabbed my flannel plaid pajamas from the drawer and a white racer back. I stripped off all of my clothes and changed into the fresh ones before going back to lay in my bed, properly pulling the comforter back. When he was down to his boxers and white t-shirt, Edward slipped in beside me and wrapped his arms around my waist.

" I haven't kissed you goodnight."

I smiled and turned around to look at him, pushing his hair out of his beautiful green eyes.

When I leaned forward, he met me halfway and pressed our lips together. I sighed contently at the feeling and sunk into his embrace. He ran his left hand over my cheek before pushing it into my hair, his thumb rubbing my temple. I parted my lips against his and felt him do the same before he snaked his tongue out to touch mine. Our lips moved together slowly and perfectly, it never felt so perfect.

These moments were ours, and nobody could ever take them from me.

" Thank you."

" For what?"

" Being here with me."

" I don't want to be anywhere else." He informed me.

I looked over at him, " You're so fucking perfect. Do you know that?"

He chuckled, " I guess I do now."

**Authors Note- I'm so glad that I was able to get this out. I wasn't too sure but I hoped you guys liked it.**

**For those who don't follow me on twitter, last Monday my grandmother passed away so it's been quite a hard time trying to keep everything together. I know this chapter is updated late at night, but I hope you all understand that it was a miracle I got it out today. I would appreciate support if I can't get out teasers in time, or if I update a bit late next time around.**

**Love you guys**

**Review!**


	16. Off By Heart

**Authors Note- Hello everyone, new chapter. I know it's late. Been a crazy week, but it's here!**

**Disclaimer- S. Meyer owns all things Twilight.**

**Chapter Song : Off By Heart by: City and Colour**

~\\~

June 2nd

Saturday

2007

~\\~

My hands were nearly shaking as I slipped on my silver Jimmy Choo leather cage sandals. Once they were on I stood up and went to the mirror, looking over every single inch of myself to make sure I looked perfect. I walked closer and grabbed my nude pink lipstick and smoothed it over my lips, wiping off the bit that touched my piercing.

I smiled when I looked at it. The other day Edward had taken me to a piercing shop and somehow got my lip ring switched out, and the little ball in the middle was in blue, gold, silver and yellow tiny dot designs. He had picked it out for me. I'd never gotten a new one, but this one was pretty cool.

My fingers brushed through my loosely curled hair and I examined my clothes.

I was wearing a scoop neck tank top in a pretty blue color tucked into a black tiered jersey skirt, and a blue/silver beaded belt where the shirt was tucked in. A sterling silver necklace with a wing charm laid on my chest, matching my shoes. My wrist was adorned in the bracelet Edward got me on my right wrist, and on my left were five crystal bangles in gold, blues, clear and purples.

I'd repainted my nails with a very light, tinted blue nail polish by nars which was my favorite. My face just had an all over foundation, and a silvery blue color for my eye shadow with a light pink highlight, mascara and a liner.

Before running out of the house I sprayed on my midnight raspberry body spray and headed out. I was fucking nervous as all get out, but I wanted to appear calm, cool and collected.

Edward told me that I had absolutely no reason to be nervous, that there was no reason to be, but I still couldn't keep myself completely from being nervous.

When I left the house everybody was having dinner, but nobody gave me a second glance. I was used to it at this point. Leah had been at Janie's, thoroughly enjoying her summer with all of her good friends. She was barely home anymore, neither were the boys. I was surprised to see them at dinner.

Today I was going to be meeting Edward's father, Edward. It sounded weird saying that. Edward had just told me I could call him Edward Sr. so it wouldn't really be as confusing; that's what they all refer to him as anyways.

I was really nervous because I know that Edward is really close to his dad, incredibly. They talk on the phone often and he is a very big part of Edward's life; so it was important that I made a good impression. I wanted him to like me, and I hoped that he would.

Edward had wanted to pick me up, but I told him that I would drive. He'd been spending a lot of time with his dad since he got here two days, and I hadn't seen him actually in two days so I definitely was looking forward to seeing him also. But they didn't see each other often so I wanted him to have that time with his dad.

When I pulled up to the familiar mansion Edward was waiting for me on the steps of the house, and smiled at me as I walked towards him. I attempted not to trip in my heels, but the moment he wrapped his arms around me I knew I wouldn't fall.

" You look absolutely beautiful today. I've fucking missed you."

" Thank you. I missed you, too."

He gave me a quick kiss before taking my hand and leading me up the stairs towards the house. Once we got to the door, Edward opened it up and I walked in first. He led me towards the kitchen with his hand on the small of my back, and then I came face-to-face with Edward's father.

I was completely and utterly shocked at how much Edward really did look like him.

He wasn't as tall as his son, but he was fairly thin and had a pretty pale complexion. I could see Edward's jaw, nose, and entire face shape within his father. What stood out the most were the bright, emerald green eyes that on a weekly basis left me dizzy and mesmerized. His hair was dark brown with no visible grey, and it was in a shorter version of Edward's disarray.

When I looked at him and then Carlisle, they were complete opposites. Esme definitely was one for variety it seemed. Edward's father's hair was so dark, and Carlisle was the lightest blonde. The only attribute they had in common was height.

He was wearing a pair of nice dress slacks and a white button up that was crisp. Not a spot on it. I couldn't forget about the fancy designer shoes that I could see my face in. Shined to perfection.

Like father like son. If Edward looked like this later on, I'd be a very satisfied woman. Not that I had the hots for his dad.

Edward stood me in front of him, and I almost felt like a display to be checked out. I couldn't help but feel even more nervous.

" Dad, this is my girlfriend, Bella Swan. Bella, this is my father, Edward Masen."

His father smiled warmly; it was the familiar crooked grin that his son had. It didn't give me that same tingly feeling as when my Edward did it, but it was warm and kind.

" It's so very nice to meet you, Bella. Finally. You can just call me Edward Sr."

I took his outstretched hand in mine and shook it once before our hands dropped.

" It's nice to meet you, too."

" I hope my son hasn't said too many terrible things about me."

I laughed, " No, of course not."

He smiled, " Well, I must say. You are much more beautiful than my son has ever been able to express over phone or e-mail."

I blushed and Edward laughed, " Don't embarrass her."

Edward Sr. smiled at me and Alice hopped into the room happily.

" Bella! You look so cute today!"

" Thanks, Alice. You look nice, too." I said, complimenting her bright yellow sun dress.

She smiled at me and skipped through the kitchen, opening the fridge to get a bottled water.

" What, I don't look cute today, too?" Edward Sr. joked at her.

Alice laughed loudly, " Oh, of course you do Edward's dad."

" Alice..."

" I know, I know; ' Alice, I think you can call me Edward Sr. at this point.'. I just think ' Edward's dad ' is much more fun to say! And plus, doesn't the senior part make you feel old?"

" Not exactly. It just reminds me that I have a crazy offspring of myself."

Edward scowled, " I'm not crazy."

I took his hand in mine and turned around to look at him. He looked really happy right now, and I loved seeing him so happy. He locked his arms around my waist and pulled me against him. His hand played idly with my hair, touching the soft curls with his fingers

" I feel like I haven't seen you in forever." he whispered.

I smiled, " I know the feeling."

His hand wrapped around mine and he turned me around the corner, taking me out of the kitchen and into the hallway. He pressed me up against the wall and looked down at me, a wicked grin on his face.

Edward's mouth descended on mine and he kissed me with fervor. I returned his passion equally and slid my hand up his chest and around his neck to grasp the hair on the back of his head. He pressed me firmly against the wall and I felt his hips flex against mine for just a moment. I wanted nothing more than to have him take me upstairs so we could keep this up; but I knew now wasn't the time.

" You look so sexy." he whispered in my ear as he ran his hand up my smooth leg, pushing my skirt up with it.

" Edward, not here..." I argued weakly before I felt his lips touch mine once more. I couldn't argue any further.

He trailed kisses all the way to my ear and I felt him bite my earlobe, earning him a low moan from my throat. My fingers tightened in his hair and he let out a quiet groan against my neck, once again flexing his hips into mine.

" Ew! Get a room!" Alice exclaimed as she saw us.

We sprung apart and I smoothed my skirt down and fixed my hair. I looked at Edward and he had some of my lipstick on his lips. I giggled quietly and brushed my thumb over his lip.

" I don't think that's your shade." I told him.

He put his arms around my waist and lifted me up, " You don't think so?"

" Yeah. Maybe more of a red color..."

Edward gripped me tighter in his arms and growled lowly in my ear.

I laughed louder and he set me down and chastely kissed me.

" You guys make me want to barf."

" Oh, they are just young. It's just like when I first met your mother, Edward."

A smile spread over my face and I leaned into Edward.

" Don't be giving them any idea's." Esme chastised as she walked into the room.

" Idea's?" Edward asked as we headed back into the kitchen.

" Well, my darling, while you are absolutely the best thing that's ever happened to me; you will not be getting Bella pregnant anytime in the near future. I'm not ready to be a grandmother."

I choked out a laugh, " Don't worry, Esme. You have nothing to worry about." I assured as I grabbed a bottle of vitamin water from the fridge.

She smiled at me and Edward looked at me from across the room, smirking.

" What she means to say, is that she is carrying my child as we speak."

" Oh, shush, you."

" Always be safe."

And that's how the conversation turned awkward.

" Yup, dad, I get it."

" Bella, do you happen to be on birth control?" Esme asked.

Alice choked on a laugh and covered her mouth with her hand, stifling her giggles through her hand.

" Uh..."

" Are you guys fucking serious? We aren't stupid!"

" Language." Esme admonished,

" Sorry. But I really do not think you guys to be giving us an edited version of the sex talk; especially in front of Alice. That's just weird."

" I'm sorry for embarrassing you both. I'm only just curious. You both spend an awfully good amount of time together alone; I just want to make sure that you are both being safe and responsible."

Apparently I was going to have to be the one to let out the next fact. Edward was too defensive.

" Edward and I aren't having sex. If in the future we do; then we'll be safe. End of story."

"So, what's for dinner?" Edward Sr. asked.

~\\~

We all sat at the Cullen's formal dining room table. It was much bigger than the one in their kitchen, with a longer rectangle shaped table with a glass top. Esme and Carlisle had made some pretty good things to eat.

Carlisle grilled up chicken and beef kebabs with onion, mushrooms and zucchini. The chicken was marinated in good season's Italian dressing, and the beef in teriyaki. It was really, really good and cooked perfectly.

Esme had put together a pasta salad that was to die for, baked potatoes with onion stuffed in them and wrapped in foil and a regular salad. I sat next to Edward and his father, right in the middle of both of them. Alice was chattering on happily, as was Emmett about school and any other random topic that came to the table.

" So, Bella, Edward has told me that you plan on graduating early? I think that is pretty remarkable." Edward Sr. stated.

I smiled, " Thank you. I've been working hard to make it happen."

" Do you have any college plans?"

" Yes. I really want to go to Columbia to go into journalism, and I'm hoping to start during January."

" And Edward will be going to Juilliard in the fall."

Every time I was reminded of it my heart clenched.

" - I'm sure everything will work out for you both. Just remember, the few months apart is just that- a few months, it's not forever."

It was the most positive thing anybody had ever said about the situation, and I looked over at Edward and smiled. He smiled back at me and squeezed my thigh with his hand.

His dad was right, it will only be a few months; it's not forever. It's very far from being forever.

" But, you can't disagree that a relationship is more than education." Carlisle stated firmly.

" Well, I was in that situation years ago. And I chose family over everything else. Is it better to be alone with just your education, or to have someone or someone's you love with you to make you happy; even if it is a struggle."

I think everybody at the table could tell that Edward's father was talking back when he and Esme were first together and when Edward came along. The table fell silent, and Carlisle set his fork down.

" I can see that point, but I think at their age; Edward and Bella shouldn't be thinking long term relationships, or getting serious. Bella is only seventeen, and Edward is nineteen almost."

" But that doesn't mean you should discourage them. Nobody at this table can say Edward has had an easy time these past few years; if he found someone to make him happy, everybody should be happy for him. His happiness does matter. Education isn't everything."

Esme cleared her throat, " I don't think we should be talking about this."

Edward Sr. looked over at her, " And you are always avoiding it and siding with your husband. Am I the only one who speaks up for our son and looks out for him?"

" Dad..." Edward started.

" No, Edward. This isn't fair to you, not at all. Might I remind everybody that he wanted to stay in Chicago, but Esme thought it would be better to give him a fresh start? From the looks of it, he is getting pushed around, discouraged. Hell, the only good thing I think he has going here was that he found himself a very lovely girl that seems to be the only one who cares about his feelings."

" I care about his feelings!" Alice exclaimed.

" Can we just resume dinner. I'll do whatever the fuck I want, when I want, with who I want, and wherever I want do it. That's what it comes down to. I don't give a flying fuck what any of you think about my relationship. Goodnight."

Before I could even say anything Edward pulled me out of my chair and we started walking down the hall.

" Edward, don't do this. Please come back here." his father requested.

" Didn't anybody get that I don't do shit I don't want to do? Everybody always fucking starts something at the table, and Bella doesn't need to hear it. Leave us the fuck alone."

We walked up the stairs and Edward was quiet all the way up to his bedroom. Once we reached the door he sat on his bed and put his head in his hands, both of his elbows on his knees. I walked up to him and pried his hands off his face, kneeling in front of him.

" I'm so sorry." he whispered.

" It's okay."

" No, it's really not."

I rested my hand on his cheek, my other hand on his chin to tip his head up slightly.

" Trust me. I know what it's like when it comes to dysfunctional families."

" I think I'd rather be ignored."

I was sure the hurt in my eyes was evident.

Being ignored...it made me feel like I meant nothing; to hear someone say that they'd want that, they didn't understand. At least the weird family he has now talks to him. They might fight, but it doesn't mean they don't care about each other no matter what the situation. Of course they fight, disagree and might be angry at each other, but when it came down to it; Edward loved his family and they loved him.

It wasn't like that with my family. Every fight pushed us further apart.

Upon seeing my expression, he looked apologetic and took my hand in his.

" I didn't meant that."

" You don't know what that's like. Nobody should ever wish for that. Do you want to feel worthless? Do you want to feel like you don't matter no matter what? I'd rather have a family that fought than have what I do. Because you all still love each other. You might be pissed at your dad, but you love him. You might resent your mom sometimes for making you move here, but you realize she did it in your best interest and you love her for it."

" I know, Angel. I didn't mean what I said; I'm just so fucking tired of people picking apart my life and making comments. Nobody can tell me that I can't be with you, or that our relationship is worthless. You're the only one who is always there, and I...I won't lose you. I can't lose you."

The look of desperation in his eyes shook me to my core, and he wrapped his arms around me tightly and held me. I locked my arms around his neck and ran my fingers through his hair.

" You won't lose me. I'm right here."

" You won't always be."

I made him look up at me and I moved my hand to rest on his heart. " Maybe I won't always be here in your arms, but I'll always be right here."

" That's kind of cheesy. Especially for you."

" Yeah, but it's true."

He pushed my shirt down and kissed over my heart. " And this belongs to me."

We stayed up in his room for a short while, not doing anything much but taking and being ourselves. I felt bad that tonight had taken a turn for the bad, but it wasn't either of our faults.

At around six thirty we headed back downstairs and the table was clear and I could hear voices in the living room. Once we entered the room, every single pair of eyes were on us. Emmett, Alice and Carlisle were playing a game of monopoly, and Esme and Edward Sr. sat on opposite ends of a couch quietly, keeping to themselves. When everybody noticed us, Edward's father stood up.

" Edward, Bella. Could I please speak with you just a moment out back?"

" Yeah."

I followed Edward outside with my hand placed firmly in his. We stood outside on the deck and we took a seat at their table. I could see how nervous his father was, tugging at his hair and pinching the bridge of his nose just like Edward does.

" I want to apologize for everything that happened at dinner. Especially to you, Bella. Tonight wasn't supposed to turn into what it did; and I sincerely apologize for everything. I let my feelings get in the way of things, and I shouldn't have done it at this time."

" You're forgiven." I said simply. It really wasn't his fault, he spoke his mind. Nobody could be fucking upset over that.

" Dad, I appreciate that you stick up for me, but no matter what I'll always do what I feel is right, and do what I want to do."

" I know. But when I hear...that man...talk to you how he does; I don't like it. You are my son, and he seems to think that just because you live here that he is your father. Growing up your mother and I have always taught you follow your dreams, to take chances even if they are a little crazy, and most of all to always follow your heart. And the moment that _Carlisle _starts speaking; all your mother does is back down from everything she's ever said, and she'll be quiet or side with him. She needs to support what you do, and tell him that he isn't always right. I'll always look out for you, no matter what, son. You know that."

" I understand. And thank you."

" Bella, once again, I am very sorry."

" It's alright."

He smiled and I felt Edward's hand on my leg.

We wrapped up the conversation and went back inside. The rest of the night we spend generally in the living room. We watched a movie and then Edward and I went back upstairs for a short while longer before I decided to go home.

While it had been a pretty interesting dinner, It was still nice meeting Edward's father despite all of the drama.

It was nine thirty when I'd gotten home, and Leah was sitting on the couch with a bowl of popcorn watching a movie. She looked up when she noticed me and I sat on the couch next to her.

" Hey. Where were you?"

" Met Edward's dad today. He's here for graduation."

Leah nodded, " How'd it go?"

" Dinner was kind of crazy, but it was alright."

" Sounds cool."

" What'd you do today?"

" Tanning, as usual. Alice is coming over tomorrow and we are going swimming at Janie's."

" Well, that sounds like fun. But, hey, I'm just going to get some sleep. I'll see you tomorrow."

She nodded and I went upstairs to my bedroom. I changed into a pair of sweatpants and a t-shirt and went over to my desk to boot up my laptop. I checked my e-mail and then went straight to facebook. The first thing on my news feed was that Edward changed his profile picture.

I smiled when I saw it was a picture of us at prom when we'd been on the dance floor. It was an up close shot from our chests up. I got a notification as I was tagged for it, and more followed.

_Jeremy Landon likes this_

_2 people like this_

_5 people like this_

_3 comments_

_Jeremy Landon- This is your girl? Damn, Masen..._

_Katelin Smith- So cute, Edward! Come visit soon!_

_Jenna Redding- Love it! _

I scrolled down along the page and saw random status updates from friends. Once I was finished I shut down my computer and went to bed ready for the long day to be over with.

~\\~

The next morning I had work at nine to two in the afternoon. My new schedule had already kicked in and I had summer school tomorrow. Since Edward didn't stop by with Alice yesterday morning, he came by this morning with Alice and his father. They sat in the stool chairs as usual and Edward smiled the moment he saw me appear out of the swing door.

I tied my apron around my waist after putting it around my neck and put it in a loose knot as I walked over to them.

" Hey, you." Edward said quietly, leaning over the counter to kiss me.

" No kissing the customers, Bella!" Charlotte said.

" I can't help it. Sorry, Char."

Edward kissed me once more before taking a seat.

" What do you want to drink?" I asked Edward Sr.

" Just coffee, please."

I gave Edward a cup, and his father, and got Alice her usual orange juice. I poured the hot coffee into the cups and put the sugar and creamer near them so they could do whatever. They all took their orders and I put them into the kitchen before getting all my other customers. Bree was also in today, which I was surprised at. I rarely see her because our schedules are opposite. Generally work meetings are the only time she's around with me.

I got more drinks, put in more orders and found myself behind the counter once more putting on two new pots of coffee. Just as I grabbed the basically empty one, it slipped it out my hands and burning hot coffee spilt all over my pants. I yelped and the coffee pot hit the floor, but luckily didn't break

" Bella!" I heard three different people yell.

Charlotte came out of the kitchen and grabbed my hands. " Do you have a change of clothes, sweetie?"

" Yeah. Oh my god, it burns."

I ran out of there as quick as I could and went to the lockers, and then went to the ladies bathroom, locked the door and took the wretched pants off. I had grabbed a clean cloth from the kitchen and wet it with cold water to soothe my red skinned legs. Once I was finished I dried it off and put on a pair of fresh jeans and wiped off my shoes. I always had clothes here, because it's a diner; anything can happen with food and drinks.

I grabbed a new black apron and secured it on and pinned my nametag on it.

When I walked back out Edward was standing right by the door, looking at me worriedly.

" Are you okay?"

" Yeah, I'm fine. My legs hurt a bit, but it's alright."

" Okay."

He kissed my forehead and I walked back behind the counter. Their orders were on the open window so I grabbed them and set them out and took care of my other customers. After my one customer left there were two others that were Bree's, and since they were eating I sat on the stood behind the counter and was organizing papers while I talked to Edward, his father and Alice.

" So, Bella. Feeling a little hot today?" Alice teased.

" Shut up. I've got a whole fresh pot over here just for you."

Edward laughed, " Watch out, Alice."

" Watch out for what?" I heard Emmett say. I looked up and he was seating himself on a stool next to Alice, and Rosalie was there. I internally groaned and smiled politely.

" Nothing. Do you guys want anything to drink?"

" I'll have a big glass of chocolate milk." Emmett said enthusiastically.

" Green tea, unsweetened."

They were so different it completely astounded me how they even got along. After everything at Prom, I didn't even know how they were still going strong.

_Opposites attract._

I got them their drinks and took orders for both of them and sent them into the kitchen. As I did more people came in and seated themselves so I took care of them before getting back to what I'd been doing.

Turns out, Edward and Alice were so right about Emmett's manners. He generally seems alright at his home, but in public, it's like where you'd think he would act at home. He talked with his food in his mouth, loudly at that. Big hand gestures and loud guffawing. It sure as hell was a sight to see.

" Alright, well, we better head out. I'll call you later, Angel."

" We're going swimming later! You have to come!" Alice exclaimed.

I smiled, " Okay. I'll talk to you later, babe." Replying to Edward

With a short kiss goodbye he was out the door with his Alice and his dad. Emmett and Rosalie stayed a short while longer before leaving. She had ignored me completely, but Emmett chattered on about anything and everything right to the moment he walked out the door.

The rest of the time I was at work seemed to go on really slowly. I had a few more customers that passed through, but by the time that it was all over, I couldn't have been happier.

Edward texted me and told me to be over at his house, and bathing suit was 'required'.

I couldn't say no to Edward Masen.

**Authors Note- So, how do you like Edward's dad? I happen to love him. Graduation is around the corner, some drama will spike up pretty soon so be ready for it.**

**Bella's outfit is in my profile, you know the drill.**

**I am going to try to reply with all reviewers.**

**If you review you get a teaser for the next chapter, so I suggest you hop to it if you want a little sneak peek!**

**And did all of you guys see Breaking Dawn Part 1? I definitely did. I didn't make it to the midnight showing, but a morning one instead. It was absolutely amazing. Kristen's dress was completely unexpected and gorgeous. I definitely can't think of a way they could have made the movie it better! Very impressed. I don't know if I can wait a year for Part 2. It's a cruel world. Let me know what you all think!**


	17. Ignorance

**Authors Note- I hope that everybody who celebrated had a Happy Thanksgiving. Did anybody get killed on Black Friday? The sales and crowds were pretty insane! Read on!**

**Disclaimer- S. Meyer owns all things Twilight.**

**Chapter Song- Ignorance by: Paramore**

~\\~

BPOV

~\\~

I laid back on the comfortable lounger and let out a contented sigh. The sun might not have been out, but it still felt nice to lie back in the heat in my bathing suit and relax after work. Turns out, Alice decided to invite Janie and Leah over to The Cullen's so they were also tossed into the group. But I couldn't forget that somehow Rosalie brought Tanya along with her and they were also hanging around.

Rosalie draped over Emmett and Tanya trying to get all over Edward in the pool. It was no surprise to see her in a hot pink, barely there bikini. The front was the smallest triangle I'd ever seen, the strings made up most of the bottom, and her entire chest basically fell out of the top. Apparently she was under the illusion that it was attractive.

I got up for a moment and went inside to grab something to drink. I poured myself a glass of lemonade and went back outside. Edward was holding Alice down underneath the water and I saw Tanya playfully splash Edward and grab onto his shoulders from behind.

I sat back and suddenly felt someone tap on my shoulder. I looked over and saw Janie standing there with a bottle of water.

" You need to get in there and show that bitch who he belongs to." she whispered.

I looked at her incredulously, not believing she told me that. She nodded once at me and I sighed.

Emmett lifted Rosalie up suddenly and jumped into the pool, her screaming the entire way. The water swished around and I saw Edward's arms fold on the concrete around the pool that was about a two inch border with white bricks. His bronze hair was dark and wet, and he looked at me as if I was the only person there and that was all that mattered.

" Get in here, beautiful."

I set my book down and smiled at him, leaning forward. I was planning on wearing my white and blue bathing suit, but decided to put on the white one instead, which was Edward's absolute favorite. I had the dark purple cover up over it so I wasn't showing everybody everything.

" Eddie! Come play with us!" Tanya yelled in her nasally tone.

I looked over and saw Janie give me a pointed look. For a sixteen year old, she was pretty fucking smart. I slipped off of the lounger and grabbed the hem of my cover up. Once it was off I set it down on the lounger and put my hair up in a high pony tail. Edward watched me slowly as I walked towards him and when I was at the edge I sat down and put my legs into the pool.

I didn't even get a chance to barely feel the water before he put his arms around my waist and pulled me in.

" Woah, holy boobs, Bella. Nice bathing suit." Emmett said with a loud whistle.

Rosalie gave him a death glare, but I turned my eyes back to Edward.

" You look amazing."

" Thank you."

I hopped up further onto him and put my hands on his shoulders, trying to push him down. He stood up completely in the five foot pool and picked me in his arms before throwing me. My body hit the water and I went underneath. He lifted me up then once more and held me against his chest.

" You're such a jerk." I spluttered out between breaths.

He smiled and kissed my nose, brushing my wet bangs out of my face.

" A jerk that cares about you."

I leaned forward, and just as our lips were about to touch, Alice shouted out that she wanted to play volleyball.

It worked out for a short while, until us super short people starting having issues. Eventually Alice was on Leah's shoulders and I perched myself on top of Edward. That all led to a game of chicken, that eventually I won, beating Alice and Janie down off Leah's shoulders.

" Emmett, Rose! Chicken."

It was pretty fucking funny being put up against Rosalie. Her hands gripped my arms so tightly it was like she was trying to break them off. I ended up shoving her backwards into the water when Emmett slipped on the floor of the pool. Edward lifted me off his shoulders like a ragdoll and got himself a victory kiss.

" No sex in the pool!" Emmett argued.

" That's no fun."

I rolled my eyes and swam my way out to one of the blow up pool loungers. I hopped up onto it and spread out. Edward put his arms on the side of it and walked me around the pool. Pushing me to the opposite side and doing laps in the pool to get me.

At some point we ended up on the two people lounger and were almost mid-nap when Emmett had flipped the entire thing over. Edward ended up falling into me and knocking me in the nose with his elbow, and we fell into the water, spluttering out chlorine that burned our throats and nose as we came up.

" You're such a fucking jackass." Edward yelled at him.

" Calm down Mr. Pissed-off."

" Yeah, I am pissed off. Leave us the fuck alone."

" Go nap in your bedroom if you're so tired."

" We weren't fucking bothering you."

Emmett looked over at me, " Dude, you need to give him some action so he will chill the fuck out."

" Maybe you should do the same to your girlfriend to get that permanent stick out of her ass."

" Low blow, Bella."

" So was yours."

I got out of the pool and felt the water fall off of my body. Alice tossed me a towel and an apologetic smile as I sat down on the lounger. A towel covered it so that it wouldn't get too wet. I dried off and used the towel to dry my hair a little bit. Edward sat next to me and whispered an apology.

" I'm sorry, Angel. It's barely been an hour and-"

" It's okay. Let's just chill."

The sun peaked out just a small sliver and Edward laid back on the lounger and I laid between his legs with my back against his chest. I felt his hands touch my stomach, his fingers spreading over the flat surface and smooth skin.

" Excited to graduate tomorrow?" I asked him.

" Kind of, in a few ways. You're going to be there, right?"

I smiled, " Of course."

" That makes it even better."

I rolled my eyes at him and put my hand over his and gave it a squeeze.

" I'm excited for you."

" I don't want to leave you in the fall."

I turned my head and looked up at him, " I know, but it'll be okay. We'll be okay."

" God, I'm going to miss you like crazy."

" Don't make me cry."

" I don't want to make you cry."

My body moved up and I turned around to lay with my face buried in his neck, breathing in his scent mixed with chlorine.

He wrapped his arms around my waist and kissed the top of my head softly. His fingers combed through my wet hair that was starting to dry from the light, warm breeze. I traced patterns on his muscular chest, playing with the fine, small amount of chest hair he had.

" Hey, I'm really sorry about earlier. What I did wasn't nice, and neither was my comment." I heard someone say.

I looked over and saw Emmett standing there with an apologetic look on his face.

" I'm sorry, too, for my comment. It was uncalled for."

" Nah, you don't have to apologize; I started it."

" Well, I just did. Thanks for apologizing."

Emmett looked over at Edward with a hopeful look.

" We cool?"

Edward looked at him, " Yeah, we're cool."

" Good."

Once he was gone Edward grabbed my towel and draped it over my body.

" Edward, it's hot."

" I don't want everyone to watch me grope you."

He rolled us over and laid ontop of me. I giggled and moved my hand down the planes of his back, leaning forward to flick the rings pierced in his lip with my tongue. His hand moved up my stomach until he reached my chest.

" Edward." I groaned lowly, " Not here."

His hips flexed against mine and I let out a low sigh and tipped my head back, my eyes closing slowly

" Stop having sex, guys. I can see your hands on her boobs, Edward!" Alice interrupted.

" I liked it better when it was just my mom, dad and I." he whispered in my ear.

I laughed and kissed his lips once before pulling away. I reached over and grabbed Edward's cigarette's and lighter.

" Can I have one?"

" You don't have to ask."

I grabbed one from the box and lit it up. I took a deep drag and blew the smoke out slowly. Edward laid on his side next to me and took it from between my fingers and stole a few puffs.

" Smoking, how cool." Leah teased as she sat down on the lounger next to ours.

I rolled my eyes and Edward reached over to put it out in the ash tray. I ran my fingers down the planes of his stomach feeling him shiver underneath me.

" You look like a display." Edward stated.

" All for you."

He grinned and dug his arm underneath my neck so I could put my head on his shoulder and his arm around my shoulders.

" Eddie? Where's the bathroom?"

Edward looked over at Tanya, uninterested. " My name is _Edward _and the bathroom is down the hallway by the foyer to the right."

She smiled, " Thanks."

Tanya scampered off into the house and Edward rolled his eyes.

" God her voice is so fucking annoying."

I laughed quietly and leaned over to kiss him. Edward finished off my glass of lemonade and I went inside to get more. As I stood up and grabbed the glass, he asked me to go upstairs and get his phone for him really quickly. I poured my glass of lemonade and walked down the foyer. When I looked over towards the bathroom, the door was wide open, but Tanya hadn't come back outside.

Without another passing thought I jogged upstairs and walked down the hallway towards Edward's bedroom. When I opened up his bedroom door I saw Tanya standing by his dresser drawer looking through his fucking boxers.

What the fuck?

" What are you doing in here?"

She stood up quickly and turned around, " What are _you _doing in here?"

" Edward is my boyfriend. I can go in his room. You however, need to get the fuck out."

" You're so delusional. He's just using you to make me jealous."

" You're calling me delusional? When he first moved here he was single, and he met you and met me. Yet, he chose me. If he really liked you don't you think that he would have gone straight to you? Edward doesn't want you, and the sooner you figure that out the better it will be. So get the fuck out of here, now."

Tanya glared at me the entire way she walked out. I closed Edward's drawer, making sure that everything was where it was supposed to be, and went to grab his cell phone from where it was before, but it was gone. I'd seen him set it on his end table before going downstairs; I remembered seeing it. I checked on the floor around it, behind the end table, and under the bed but I came up with nothing.

I looked all around his room before running back downstairs quickly but carefully. When I got back outside I walked past Edward and towards Tanya and Rosalie. He called out my name but I completely ignored him and walked straight up to them.

Emmett was standing next to Rosalie, looking confused at my defensive stance.

" Where is it?" I demanded.

" Where is what?" Tanya sneered.

" His cell phone. You took it. I'm not stupid."

" What?" Emmett said. " How would she have it?"

" I went upstairs to get it for Edward and found her in his bedroom looking through his drawers. He left it on his end table earlier, I saw him do it."

She scoffed, " I took nothing."

" I saw you put something in your bag when you got back outside, Tanya." I heard Leah say.

I turned around and grabbed her beach bag from the ground, she yelled and screeched at me as she charged in my direction. I rifled through the pink beach bag and found it at the bottom, hidden under a summer dress. When I grabbed it and held it up, her eyes went wide.

" What the fuck are you doing with my cell phone?" Edward yelled, running up and stopping behind me.

" No-Nothing. I-I swear. I don't know how I got it."

" Yeah, right. You were in his room. I saw you."

" Get the fuck out of here, Tanya. Go, right now." Edward said.

" Why should I go? I didn't do anything."

" Yeah, you did."

" I bet you put it in my purse to frame me! Knifing little bitch."

" You're crazy!" I yelled at her.

Without any warning her hand lifted up and she smacked me right across the face. I felt her sharp, fake nails cut into my lip and I stumbled back when I felt the sharp sting of her hand. I felt my entire being flood with pure anger, and I had just felt Edward grab for me, his hands grazing my arms as he was unable to grab me. The moment my body hit the ground, everything went black

~\\~

" Bella, Angel. Come on, wake up."

I felt his cool hands on my face first, and my body felt tingly. Familiar hands ran over my face and through my hair. My eyes opened and my head throbbed and my lip hurt. I tried to sit up, but my head started to spin and I laid back down.

" Don't sit up, Bella."

I lifted my hand to the top of my head.

" What's going on?" I asked.

" You passed out after Tanya hit you. I caught you before you fell."

Slower this time, I sat up and Edward had his arm around my waist.

" You, okay?"

" Yeah, just a little dizzy."

" I'm going to fucking kill her."

I leaned up against Edward and saw that I was on his bed. He held me up against him and ran his fingers through my hair.

" Can I sleep for awhile? You don't have to lay here with me. I just don't think I can drive home right now."

" Of course, Angel. Look, I have to go pick up my suit in a bit with my dad in Seattle. It'll be a few hours until I get back, but you can stay here. You're phone is right on the table, and I put your bag on my chair, okay?"

I nodded and he kissed my forehead sweetly and went over to get in the shower. When I laid down, the top for my bathing suit wasn't comfortable to sleep in, from the knot of fabric on my neck and the clasp around my back. I stripped it off and shifted on my stomach, sliding my hands underneath the pillow after putting the comforter up to the back of my neck.

I heard Edward get out of the shower, and the shift of fabric as he put clothes on.

" Shit, she was looking through my boxers?" Edward said to himself.

" Yeah." I mumbled against the pillow.

He chuckled, " That's so fucking weird."

" I didn't know you owned so many silk boxers. Black, blue, grey..."

" Are you teasing me?" he asked as he slid onto the bed. I reached my hand out and found the waistband of his jeans. I slid my hand down his pants and over the curve of his ass, feeling the silky boxers under my finger tips.

" No. I love your boxers."

He let out a quiet moan and pulled my hand out and lifted it up to his lips to kiss each of my fingers and palm. I smiled against the pillow and he set my hand down on the comforter. He slid his hands over my back and let out a small noise.

" Where's your top, Miss. Swan?"

" It wasn't comfortable."

He pushed the comforter down to expose my back and started to lay kisses over the exposed skin.

" I love how soft your skin is."

I hummed quietly into the pillow and felt my body turn into jelly. I was no longer focused on my headache. He massaged my skin with his hands, kneading it until my muscles were loose and relaxed.

" That feel good?"

I let out a quiet 'mhm' and kept my eyes clothes, my body becoming completely slack. I was close to falling asleep, but his hands kept me awake in the best way. When he had to stop I whined quietly and he turned me around and kissed my nose before tucking me back under the covers.

" Are you going to be here when I get back?"

" Yeah." I breathed.

" Put this on, okay? I don't want anybody seeing something only I'm allowed to see." Edward said, giving me one of his black wife beaters.

" Okay. Bye, babe."

" I'll see you soon, Angel."

He left and closed the bedroom door behind him. I slipped on the wife beater of his and snuggled into his bed and closed my eyes. My mind wandered to Edward and a smile spread over my face and I fell contently into sleep.

~\\~

" Bella? Wake up, dear."

I felt a gentle shake on my shoulders and my eyes opened and I sat up and saw Esme sitting on the edge of the bed. She was holding a q-tip and some kind of clear jell. I rubbed my eyes tiredly and looked at her confusedly.

" I'm so sorry to wake you, dear, but I just wanted to put a little bit of this jell on your lip. It'll help you heal better."

The cut was on my bottom lip on the left side, which I thanked god for. If my lip ring had gotten tugged out of place I would have killed Tanya. Esme put the jell on my lip, and it stung just a little but it wasn't too bad. It was cold, so it helped alleviate the pain a bit.

" I feel for awful for that vile girl doing this to you."

" It's not your fault, Esme." I said quietly.

She finished rubbing it in and put the cap on the jell, setting it on Edward's end table by his bed

" Well, you certainly didn't deserved to be hit. Luckily your cheek isn't too red anymore. When Edward brought you in it was very bad. I thank heavens you landed in the grass."

" Me, too."

" Okay, sweetheart, I'll be downstairs if you need anything. I brought you some water, with a straw to make it easier just for now."

" Thanks, Esme. I appreciate it."

She nodded and left the room quietly. All I wanted to do was go right back to sleep. My body was exhausted for some reason. The room fell dark and it made it easier to sleep. I put the television on low, the quiet voices helping to soothe me just a bit before it made me drift off once again.

The next time I woke up, it was to Edward. I heard some ruffling around in his bedroom, opening and closing his closet and bathroom doors. He changed the channel on the television and opened up his drawer to his things.

I sat up and looked over at him as he was stripping off his jeans.

" Hi."

" Hey, you. My mom said you slept all while I was gone."

" Yeah. I'm tired. I don't know why. What happened to Tanya?"

" Well, Rosalie started defending her when I was trying to lift and wake you up; and Alice and Emmett went ape shit on Tanya and forced Rose to drive her home, and then Rosalie came back here acting all fucking defeated and wanted to know if you were alright. Leah and her and Alice's little friend Janie, right? Uh, yeah, she and Leah are sleeping over tonight. Emmett and Rose went out awhile ago."

" Oh, okay."

" Leah got really upset, Bella. When you passed out she looked really fucking scared."

I nodded, " Sometimes when I get overly stressed and upset it happens, her hitting me didn't help. I'm really sorry."

" Don't apologize for that shit."

My arms reached out for him and he sat on the bed and leaned forward to hold me. I wrapped my arms around his neck and he leaned down to kiss me. I winced when his lips came in contact with mine, it stung harshly.

" Fuck, now I can't even kiss you." I groaned as I moved away."

" Goddamn that bitch and her fake nails." Edward grumbled.

I smiled faintly and hopped off the bed to use the washroom. I went to Alice's room and went to talk to Leah for a moment afterwards; she just wanted to know that I was alright and I assured her that everything was okay and not to worry. When I went downstairs I grabbed a coke and a straw and headed back upstairs to Edward's bedroom.

He'd basically tried to steal the coke from me the moment he saw it. I shoved his hands away as he tried to take it and he pulled at me again.

" Get off me." I laughed, pushing on his shoulder.

" Mm." he hummed as his lips caught the straw once more. I put the drink on my side of the table and straddled his waist, grabbing his wrists and holding them above his head. His eyes held mischief, and I knew that if he wanted he could completely turn me over and take control.

He broke free and his hands attacked my sides, making me yell out.

After a few moments of fooling around in his bed, wrestling together, Edward settled in behind me and draped an arm on my waist to hold me against him.

" I love this." he murmured quietly in my ear, brushing my hair behind me.

" What?"

" Being with you like this."

" I love it, too." I replied, shifting in his arms to face him.

Edward stared into my eyes, keeping very quiet for a long while with a wistful look on his face.

" I'm falling so hard for you. And I hope you feel the same way."

I slid my hand into his crazy bronze hair and smiled at him, " I do. Before you all I thought about was work and school, and to get out of here. I never thought..."

" I know. The first thing I said to myself when I moved here was that I was getting the fuck out the moment I graduated. Now, I don't even want to leave."

He leaned forward and kissed my top lip gently before pulling back.

" So, got your gold gown all ironed?" I teased.

" That color is so unattractive."

" But you make it look hot. I can't wait to see you in a suit."

" Oh, really?"

" Mhm."

" What are you going to be dressed in tomorrow, hm?"

" You want me to get all dolled up for you."

" I think that you look beautiful in anything."

" Maybe if you're lucky I'll wear a dress."

Edward gave me a small smile, and I leaned forward to rest my head on his chest. His fingers ran through my long, curly hair and his lips pressed against my forehead very lightly.

" I'm so glad you're okay."

I shrugged, still annoyed at the situation. " I wish I could have spent more time with you outside."

" We have tomorrow."

" Tomorrow?"

" Didn't you hear? The Cullen's are throwing a huge graduation bash tomorrow night." He said in an fake excited voice. I knew that this was probably all Alice's idea.

I laughed quietly, " Is that so?"

" Yes."

" Beer?"

Edward squeezed my waist," You bet. But I think you should stay away from it."

" Why?"

" Because I don't want a raging drunk girlfriend in a house full of men who try to take advantage of her."

" I can take care of myself." I argued feebly.

He touched my lip, " Really? You think you can?"

I sat up and looked down at him.

" Yeah. I took care of myself just fine before you."

" Don't get like that with me."

" Get like what? I'm not a fragile little girl, Edward. I can take care of myself."

Edward sat up and looked at me right in the eyes, leveling with me " I know that."

" Then what was that a minute ago? Look, I get you have a protective side, but I've gotten drunk before. It's not like I end up in some random guy's laps and make out with them. I'm not like that, and I hate that you don't trust that."

" I do."

" I'm just going to head home. I don't really feel like sleeping over."

_LIAR._

" Please, don't go. I didn't mean what I said."

" I just need to be alone right now. I'll just see you tomorrow."

I took his shirt off and put on my cover-up I had on earlier. He quickly got out of bed and I felt both of his hands wrap around my wrists, stopping my movements.

" Angel, please, don't go. I don't want you to leave tonight."

" I have to go." I said quietly and took my keys and phone from the end table.

I left him standing alone in his bedroom; and the look of heart break on his face almost made me turn around. I didn't meet his eyes, knowing if I did I'd turn right around and run into his arms.

~\\~

As I drove home, my mind couldn't stop from wandering. I felt bad for leaving Edward, but I knew what I did was the right thing to do. I needed to think inside my own head and not be clouded by everything around me.

Before Edward, nobody told me what I was able to do and what not to do. I got used to making all my decisions for myself, and I never worried about what anybody else thought because I never had to. Even though what Edward told me wasn't in a completely controlling manor; I still got that feeling inside of me. It was unknown and I couldn't pinpoint it.

When I got home, I felt like I hadn't been here in ages. I went inside and headed upstairs to my bedroom. Once the door was locked I took off my clothes and went straight for the shower. I stood underneath the spray for awhile. I breathed in the steam and enjoyed it.

Once I was finished in the shower I changed into a pair of comfortable sweat pants and a simple white v-neck shirt. My damp hair was braided and I hopped into bed and heard my phone go off a few times, signaling a text message. I grabbed my phone and saw that I had four text messages, all from Edward. Without reading them, I just composed a message, telling him that I was going to bed and I would talk to him tomorrow.

I curled up on my side and held my pillow against me.

I hated that I was basically ignoring Edward and shrugging him off. Right now, he was all I had, but I needed to feel in complete control of myself again. I didn't want to lose myself into this relationship even though my entire being just wanted Edward all the time and nothing else. I've always been a logical person. I thought nothing could fucking change that.

I fell asleep that night with the same troubled thoughts plaguing me.

**Authors Note- I hope everybody is enjoying the fluff right not, besides the end, because very soon something is coming up! Look forward to it!**

**I have links to three of Bella's bathing suits. When I was reducing chapters, I had a shopping skit and it somehow got deleted and I just couldn't rewrite it in a way that satisfied me. But I have the link for the Polyvore set in my profile. Check it out.**

**Everybody who REVIEWS will get a TEASER for chapter 18!**


	18. I Gotta Feeling

**Authors Note- Happy Friday. I hope everybody had a wonderful week! Reviews for last chapter were fucking awesome. They really motivated me this week!**

**Disclaimer- S. Meyer owns all things Twilight.**

**Chapter Song: I Gotta Feeling by: The Black Eyed Peas **

~\\~

BPOV

~\\~

Getting up in the morning was a complete bitch. I had to get ready for my first day of summer school, and I honestly did not feel like getting up at all. Later I would be going to Edward's graduation, and then be at the party afterwards. I did have someone taking my hours just for today. Bree was covering for me, and she nicely offered to do it when I told her about the situation.

I got dressed quickly into a pair of dark wash shorts, a light cream colored blouse that cinged at the bottom over the waistband of my jeans, and a pair of brown flats. I put my hair in a curled side ponytail and did nothing with my eyes but a light shadow, eye liner and mascara.

I was planning on changing my clothes for Edward's graduation today, of course. My phone was once again, full of texts. I wanted to keep my mind clear right now. After all, it was my first day and I wanted to go into class without a clouded mind. Downstairs, I saw my father sitting at the table in the kitchen. I had a half cup of coffee before heading out towards the car. He, of course, didn't say a word to me. I didn't give a shit anymore.

When I got to school, it was pretty much empty in the parking lot. When I got inside there were a few people wandering around.

Walking into Physics, it was me and five other students'. Mr. Lloyd was teaching this class, and I've heard he is a pretty strict guy so I was definitely wondering if that was as is.

~\\~

The moment I walked out of Physics, a girl name Heather, also in the class walked up next to me.

" I thought I was going to die in there. And we have to spend a month with him?"

I laughed, " Yeah, I definitely hear what you're saying."

I had a half hour until my next class, and had a break about two hours ago. I went into the lunch room, which was completely empty and took my seat with a bottle of water that I had in my hands. When I took my phone out, I finally leafed through all of the text messages from Edward.

_Please talk to me, Angel. I'm so sorry about what I said. _

_Bella, please. I was a jerk about what I said._

_I'm going crazy. I can't sleep. Please text me or call me._

_Baby...Please talk to me._

_Fuck, please text me back so I know your okay. I'm starting to worry about you._

I sighed deeply and composed a reply to his messages. I didn't want him to worry about me, this was supposed to be a good day for him.

_I'm okay._

_-B xx_

I shut my phone off and hung out in the room until I headed to Senior AP World History. When I got there, I saw about seven people. I was surprised there was more here than in Physics. I barely even have to pay attention in History and I pass with flying fucking colors.

The class seemed to go on forever, and it was easy enough. Physics was a bit of a challenge, but luckily I think I would do alright and be able to keep up with the quicker pace. I had to have confidence that I could pull it off, and I did.

When World History was done, I packed my book up in my bag, along with a few homework sheets and headed out on my way. The class was mostly work sheets, a quick lesson, and then a sheet. I was expecting this fast pace. We were taking a full entire class that goes on all school year, and packing it into a month, it was expected.

Later on when I got home I went right upstairs and started on my homework. Graduation started at seven, and I knew that Cullen's and Edward's father was going to be getting seats and hopefully one reserved for me. I planned to text Alice when I got there at around six thirty to ask her where they were. It was going to be outside, and the class was going to be probably one hundred and fifty students at the most. And there was only one set of bleachers so hopefully there would be room.

My physics homework was a little bit challenging, but with the help of my book I was able to figure everything out fine. World History was really easy, and I was simply able to fly right through it.

At around five I put all of my finished homework away and started getting ready.

I found a white spaghetti strapped dress with a pretty aqua blue design on the fabric. It was summery, yet still very nice for the event. I curled my hair and pinned my bangs back out of my face, poufing it just slightly. I re-did my eyes with a silver color, and kept the black liner and mascara. I put on just a little foundation and a gloss and called it a day.

To match the dress I had a pair of heels that were the same blue in the dress, and put on my cropped leather jacket for a little bit of an extra touch.

I grabbed my phone and keys and once again found myself heading towards the school. I was surprised summer school started today considering summer school started, but all classes were over by six, which was mandatory. The parking lot was filled already, but I luckily found myself a place and didn't have to park in the grass at all. I texted Alice before heading in and she told me they were right in the middle at the front.

Carefully I headed out to the field, and walked carefully up the metal bleachers. It was completely packed here, and as I walked along I saw Alice and she smiled at me and patted the spot next to her. I sat between her and Carlisle and set my things on my lap.

" I'm glad you're here. He's been really upset all day."

" We just had a stupid argument last night."

" Yeah, he mentioned that to me. He honestly doesn't think you're here."

I sighed, " I know."

" You guys are going to be okay though, right?" she asked desperately.

" Yeah."

The rest of the time we were quiet, and I leafed through the little book I got when I walked in here, it was a list of names. There were one hundred and forty three students graduating this year. I was surprised there were that many considering the school only has about three hundred students.

When the teachers filed out onto the stage, then the students came next. It was really easy to spot Edward; he was nearly the tallest one in the crowd. The Valedictorian this year was some guy named Justin. I didn't even know him, but he'd made a really good speech that was pretty enjoyable to listen to.

Soon they started after all the other speeches from the principal to a few teachers, and student's names were called. I clapped for both Emmett, and especially James. It wasn't too long before I heard ' Edward Anthony Masen' called onto the stage and he walked up proudly and took his diploma from Principal Greene, shook his hand and paused on the stage to take his picture before taking his seat. Esme was completely beaming, and Edward Sr. had literally screamed for him. I hoped that Edward knew how proud his parents were of him. And the rest of his family. I'd never fucking had that in my life, and seeing his family so supportive of him made me beam.

Yeah.

Beam.

I didn't think I was capable of that either.

The names seemed to bleed into each other after that. I wanted nothing more than to run to Edward, but I knew that we would have to wait. It started to drizzle just slightly towards the end, and before I knew it all of the caps were being thrown up into the air as the familiar graduation song played.

They all filed out as such, and I smiled at how proud I was of Edward myself. He'd had trouble around the time he dropped out, but he was able to get the courage to go back and do it again. He was stronger than anybody I knew.

It was a little crowded as everybody started to gather in the parking lot. Clumps of people hugging, yelling, and searching for family as they shoved past people.

Edward seemed to have disappeared into the crowd, because it was easy to find Emmett. Then again, he was fist pumping and acting like a fucking goon, per usual Emmett.

I'd seen James with his family and the moment he saw me he gave me a hug and I whispered a quiet 'Congratulations' in his ear. I was proud of him, too. He'd finally stepped up and was able to graduate; even it was a little bit late. The fact he did it was what really counted in all of this.

As I shuffled through the crowd, trying to find the one that I wanted to see the most, I froze when I saw him. His eyes met mine and I saw him hold his cap in his hand, the tassel hanging down. The look on his face was the same one it was when I left him last night.

Without another thought I dashed towards him and leapt into his arms. He lifted me up easily and held me against his chest closely. I wrapped my arms around his neck and pressed a kiss against his collarbone

" I'm so, so sorry." he whispered in my ear, kissing just underneath it.

" Shh, it's okay. I shouldn't have taken it so personally. I know you didn't mean it like how it was said."

" I thought...Fuck, after last night...and you didn't respond to my texts I thought...I can't lose you."

" I know. I'm not fucking going anywhere."

Our lips met in a deep kiss and I held myself closer to him, never wanting to let go. He kissed me back, and I tightened my fingers in his hair, slanting my mouth over his, ignoring the burn of my cut lip. We didn't care about the people around us; it was only us two stuck in this little bubble.

" Looks like we found him, and Bella." Emmett stated, laughing.

I pulled away and put my head on his shoulder as he still held me up in his arms.

" Congratulations, son." his father said proudly, patting him on the back.

Esme reached over and kissed his cheek lovingly, " I'm proud of you, kid."

" Thanks. I'm going to head home with Bella. Is that alright?"

" Of course. See you in a bit." Esme said, rubbing his shoulder and kissing his cheek once more.

Edward took me by surprise and shifted my body around in his arms to hold me bridal style. I yelped and grabbed onto his neck tightly not to fall. He put his cap on my stomach to hold and I directed him to my car, trying not to laugh at the weird expressions from people.

When we got inside the car and I started it up, Edward turned towards me and slid over the bench in an instant and his lips were on mine. I put my arms around him and eagerly responded to his kiss.

Soon I had to pull away from him, " We have to get out of here unless we want to be trapped here forever."

" I might not mind that."

He kissed the spot underneath my ear and wrapped his arm around my waist, leaning into me. I turned out of the parking lot and headed down the road towards the Cullen's house.

" When does this party start?" I asked him.

" Like a half hour. Carlisle and my mother are actually going to be heading to Seattle tonight to get a hotel and spend the day there tomorrow, and my father offered to stick around the upstairs just to make sure the party doesn't get too wild."

" God forbid."

He kissed the side of my neck and I turned into their driveway. We spent just a few minutes down their long driveway and then I parked behind the rest of them and hopped out of the car. Edward held my hand the entire way up the stairs to the house.

Esme had produced a perfect rectangle shaped chocolate cake with yellow piping designs and in blue it said ' Congratulations Emmett and Edward!' in very elegant piping on the cake. It sat on their kitchen table, with streamers hung all around the kitchen in an elegant manner.

Both Emmett and Edward hugged Esme in thanks for the cake, and she started to cut out pieces to everybody who wanted one.

" Fuck, I can't wait to throw this god-awful gown in the garbage."

" No! You will not throw that gown away Edward Anthony Masen!"

" What am I going to do when I go off to college, mom? Or when I move out all together? Cart that thing around in my suitcase, hell no."

" It will stay in this house!"

" Fine, fine. Whatever you want." he grumbled.

Everybody hung around the kitchen for awhile, eating cake and enjoying conversation. It was loud and busy, but I loved it. It's something that I'd always wanted in a family. I enjoyed the loud enthusiastic voices, the hustle and bustle of people.

I adjusted myself in Edward's lap and he rested his chin on my shoulder, looking over at me with a small smile. I dipped down with my head to the side to give him a soft kiss. His hand came up to touch my cheek and I gently bit his lip rings, smiling against his mouth.

" Looks like they are starting the party early." Emmett guffawed.

" Okay, well, we are heading out. Please do not wreck my brand new house." Esme said, giving Emmett a stern glance.

Edward Sr. laughed at her, " Everything is under control."

" Then we know it's in trouble." she replied with an eye roll

" What happened to being spontaneous?"

" I put all of the spontaneity into our son. We'll see you kids tomorrow night. Remember what I told you."

" Be safe." Edward said.

Esme kissed the top of Edward's head and ran her fingers through his bronze hair.

Carlisle took Esme's hand and once the front door shut, Alice was immediately on her feet and pushing on Edward Sr.'s back towards the foyer.

" Upstairs!"

" Now?"

" Yup!"

" If you break something, tell me right away. Don't get too drunk. I'll be upstairs in the guest room all night unless you need me, alright?"

" Okay, bye!" Alice exclaimed excitedly

He went upstairs with a roll of his eyes and we cleaned up the kitchen and I helped Edward get liters of soda and cases of beer out from the garage.

Esme and Carlisle weren't really aware of the beer, but Edward's dad had a talk with Edward apparently last night about it and picked some up. I hoped that nothing crazy would happen, but I was sure it wouldn't be any crazier than a party at James' house.

I knew that Angela and Jess were coming tonight for some fun also, and Ben was tagging along. Of course James was showing up as usual. I went upstairs with Edward and slipped my cropped jacket off and put my things there. Edward didn't change; he just unbuttoned his shirt a bit and rolled the sleeves up. He still made the effortless look be sexy.

The doorbell rang and Edward clapped his hands, " Let's go."

~\\~

Holy Jesus fuck was my boyfriend drunk.

I spent most of the beginning of the night with Edward, dancing and drinking just a little. I didn't want to get trashed tonight, so I didn't drink much other than a beer. When Angela and Jessica got here I kind of went off to hang with them and Edward went off with James and a few other guys. Alice had joined our little group and we were just hanging around, talking and laughing at all the drunken idiots and ungraceful people trying to dance to the music. It was more like a tangle of limbs and weird thrusting movements.

It was pretty fucking funny.

The party was actually really good. They had so much space to dance in when they moved their furniture around, and there was plenty of food and treats to go around for everybody so nothing had run out yet. Beers were passed around, and a few responsible people had water that Alice set out.

The music wasn't all rap and hip hop, and I could tell that Edward made sure some of his taste was thrown in there. Unfortunately, I had seen Tanya and Rosalie hanging around with Emmett when I last saw them. She only glared at me and flipped her hair over her shoulder in usual fashion. I honestly couldn't wait until I was leaving here and putting all of her bullshit behind me.

As hours passed, I had realized that I hadn't seen Edward in awhile so I told the girls that I would be back and went out searching. After checking the entire first floor, I headed upstairs to his room, and still I couldn't find him. Then I headed outside.

I'd found him alright; he was hanging outside with James by the pool, completely drunk off his ass. A few other guys were hanging out also, just as drunk as Edward and they were all talking and laughing together. The only one who seemed to have grip on themselves was surprisingly James.

" There she is! I mean can you not look at that sexy piece of woman and not want that. Come here, Angel." he slurred.

I rolled my eyes, " You are so fucking drunk right now."

" I'm sorry."

" Hey, you dealt with my drunk ass, it's only fair."

He pulled me into his arms and sat me in his lap, " See, this girl right here, is so perfect. And damn can she give good he-"

" Okay, alright. That is quite enough." I said, putting my hand over his mouth.

Edward took my hand off his mouth and kissed me. He tasted like beer and cigarettes.

It wasn't the best kiss we've ever had.

" Come with me." I told him, helping him stand up.

" Aww, come on, Edward, man! Don't let the chick ruin the fun." Some guy shouted out.

" This chick is the fun, ladies." Edward slurred out.

I smiled and took him inside. Alice walked up, took one look at him, and started to laugh. Edward gave her a look of being very offended and glared at her, leaning heavily into me and kissing my temple sloppily.

" Dude, you are so shit-faced." she exclaimed

" Go mount Jasper, Alice."

She gasped and her eyes went wide. I laughed quietly and rested my hand on Edward's chest. When I started taking him upstairs, that's when he got very vocal.

" You see my fellow classmates! I, Edward Masen, am completely shit-faced as my step-sister put it! And I might be, but none of you drunken men out here are lucky enough to have a woman as sexy as Isabella Swan to put you to bed. Con-Graduation, motherfuckers!"

I groaned and gave him a shove, " That's enough, let's go."

When I got him to his bedroom, I sat him down on the bed and he immediately grabbed onto my waist and pulled me down with him, pressing his body down against mine and trapping me against the mattress and his body.

" Edward..." I trailed off.

" Hm?"

" Not now. I think you should lie down."

" I'm not tired. I just want to kiss you. Fuck, you're so hot."

I chuckled quietly, " How about you brush your teeth and take a quick shower."

" Only if you join me."

" I don't think so."

" Fine."

He pushed me off and crossed his arms like a petulant child. I sighed and started heading towards the bathroom taking my shoes off as I did. He wasn't going to relent, especially being drunk like this. I didn't know he was stubborn like that, but apparently he was.

" Let's go. Hurry before I get in before you."

I started up his shower and slipped my dress off my body, along with the undergarments. Edward walked into the bathroom already out of his clothes and I got into his shower. He stepped in behind me and wrapped his arm around me.

" I really want you right now." he whined.

" I know, baby."

I let him have his way with washing up and once both of us were clean, we stepped out of the shower. I wrapped a towel around me and handed one to Edward. Then I figured out that on average; It takes about five minutes to convince a drunk person to brush their teeth, and finally he did, and I got him into a pair of boxers myself and got him into bed. It was loud downstairs, but I hoped he could still calm down a bit.

I borrowed a pair of his boxers and a wife beater and got into bed with him after fixing my hair. He was getting all gropey and his lips were on mine constantly, but at least he wasn't getting too overzealous and trying to take clothes off. I didn't want to do anything with him in this state.

" Edward, stop grabbing my waist." I complained for the millionth time.

He did it just to spite me and laughed obnoxiously loud when I reacted. I grabbed his hands firmly and linked them firmly together with mine before leaning forward.

My mouth slanted over his and I moaned quietly into his mouth. I was taking advantage of his condition, but if it would distract him for a few minutes and tire him out it was worth it. He didn't taste like beer or cigarette's anymore so it was definitely more enjoyable. Eventually he stopped kissing me and seemed to have tired out a bit. I let him be and he slumped off to the side and fell asleep. I turned my back to him and curled up, closing my eyes.

I just barely knew it when Edward slipped out of bed and started leaving the room with his silly, drunken ass attitude. He was already heading downstairs before I awoke. I grabbed his hoodie that was on his lounger to cover up a bit and started running.

" Where's the beer?" I heard him yell out.

Oh, fuck.

He was in the middle of the kitchen, in all of his silk boxer-ness with nothing else on. All the girls were fucking checking my man out, and I did not like that. Edward popped open a beer and got to working. I stood infront of Edward, my arms crossed with my eyebrow raised.

" Oh, don't be mad."

" Do you see what you're wearing? Or better yet, what you're not wearing?"

A few people laughed, but they were mostly immersed in the party. It was slowly winding down as it neared almost two in the morning.

" Yeah. I look sexy, right?"

" Right!"

Fuck you, Tanya.

I walked over towards Edward and put my arm around him, " If you come upstairs with me, you can keep the beer and I'll make it worth your while." I whispered quietly enough for him to hear.

" Are we talking sexual favors? Bella Swan, you are willing to have some good fun if I go upstairs?" he said loudly.

I glared at him and he wrapped his arm around my waist, " Now, everybody, the party is upstairs; in my bedroom. If you want to listen, gather by the door; but don't fucking open it. Nobody besides me gets to see this sexy ass naked." he announced.

I put my forehead on his chest and sighed, " You are something else, Edward Masen."

~\\~

I woke up in the morning and there was a quiet tapping of rain on the glass walls. My body was very exhausted. When I looked over I saw Edward laying over all the covers wearing absolutely nothing.

What the fuck happened to his boxers?

I didn't want to know.

I grabbed the blanket at the end of the bed and covered him with it and carefully moved to rest my head on his chest. My eyes closed and I once again fell asleep, waking up only a little bit later to the feeling of Edward's fingers running through my hair.

" Hey." he whispered quietly.

" Hi."

" What happened last night?" he asked.

" You got drunk, I tried to take you upstairs but you were all gropey. I somehow got you in the shower but you basically made me join you because you refused to shower and were acting like a kid. Took you five minutes to convince you to brush your teeth, got into bed, we made out, you groped and later on snuck of the room wearing only your boxers to go downstairs to get a beer."

" Oh, fuck. I'm so sorry."

" It's okay. But where are your boxers?"

" I woke up and was like, really fucking hot so I just got naked. Not a fan?"

" Big fan."

He chuckled and I closed my eyes and snuggled into him. Edward held me closely to him and kissed the top of my head.

" Did I talk like a tool?"

" Well, you called me a 'sexy piece of woman', almost told a few guys that I give a good-something and then when I was taking you upstairs you were saying how you're the luckiest man because others don't have anybody as sexy as Isabella Swan to take you to bed. And then at the end when I tried to coax you upstairs, you told everybody that the party was going to be upstairs in your bedroom, and to listen by the door but not open it because nobody can see 'this sexy ass naked' besides me."

" God, I'm such an ass. I'm so sorry."

" Don't apologize. We all get like that sometimes. What time is it?"

" Eight thirteen."

" I want to sleep more."

" So do I. But, you know, it's kind of awkward sleeping naked all by myself."

I choked out a laugh, " That's unfortunate."

I rolled over on my side, facing away from him and about a foot between us. My body sunk into the mattress and I buried my face in the pillow and sighed contently. I felt Edward throw the comforter off and he grabbed the waistband of his boxers I was wearing.

" Edward! Don't you dare!"

He pulled them off before I could do anything, and I was just left in my white lace underwear.

" Sexy, sexy."

I grabbed the sheet from him with a huff and wrapped it around my waist firmly.

" Leave me alone." I grumbled.

" I don't want to."

" I'll take the guest room."

" What, you want to fucking cuddle up next to my dad?"

I rolled my eyes, " No, I'll make him come in here to cuddle with your naked self."

" You are so gross, Isabella.'

My head whipped back, " Don't call me that."

" Isabella." he said. I cringed. Edward came up behind me, his lips near my ear as he whispered my name once again in a low, rough, seductive voice that made me groan.

" Stop it, Edward!"

" Is-a-bel-la."

I shoved him away from me and slid out of the bed. I grabbed the blanket that was wrapped around him and tore it off, leaving him bare. My hand grasped for a pillow and I set it down on the lounger and hopped onto it, wrapping the blanket around me and closing my eyes. The light was a little blinding here, but I burrowed my head into the blanket.

" Oh, you! Isabella Swan you are so fucking stubborn!"

I heard his feet hit the ground and he scooped me up in his arms. I let out a yelp and he threw me onto the bed.

" Personally, I thought this would be more fun with no clothes; but whatever you want, you get, princess."

I glared at him and he laid next to me on the bed.

" You need to cover up that pasty white ass." I told him.

" I kind of like this whole naked thing, though."

My hand roamed over his lower half and I grabbed the sheet and covered him up.

" I don't want someone coming in here and seeing what is mine."

" You own this ass?"

" I fucking own that ass." I agreed. " Now can I please go back to sleep?"

Edward laid flat on his back and gestured for me to cling on. I chuckled quietly as I rested my head on his chest and rested my hand flat next to it. He covered his hand with mine and bent his head closer to mine as he closed his eyes. I felt his right hand move underneath me to hook around the back of my knee, and he hooked it over his hip and ran his hand up and down my skin.

" You own me for as long as you want."

" I know." I murmured quietly.

~\\~

" Wake up! It's already past twelve!"

I sighed and turned over on my side, feeling a sudden breeze on my back; I covered up with the sheet and looked down.

That jackass had taken my shirt off after I fell asleep!

" Holy naked! Cover up!"

Edward curled himself around me and wrapped the comforter tighter around us. I closed my eyes and felt myself drifting off slowly. He was warm and comfortable, despite the boniness of his skinny self.

" Get the fuck out, Alice."

" It's twelve in the afternoon!"

" Yeah, and I don't give a shit. Get out."

I shifted around in his arms.

" You're such a lazy ass!"

" She's waking up. Shut your trap, Alice."

My leg curled around his and I sighed, leaning back into Edward for more of his warmth. He kissed the back of my neck softly and ran his hand down over my stomach.

" We should get up, Angel."

" No."

He chuckled and pushed my hair back from my face.

" You took my shirt off." I stated.

" Sorry."

He got up and grabbed some boxers from his drawer, slipping them on with a pair of jeans. With an annoyed groan I slipped my dress on and fixed my hair in a high ponytail. I did my makeup in the bathroom and then stepped out barefoot.

Edward made the bed pretty half-assed and started to drag me downstairs.

Instead of following him to the kitchen I laid across the couch with a tired groan.

" Tired, Bella?" I heard Edward's father ask.

" Edward probably kept her up all night with all his drunken lovin'."

I gave Emmett the finger and Edward leaned down to kiss my temple.

" I got you some coffee, sweetheart."

" How sweet." Alice said in a teasing tone.

" What is with you today? You've been fucking annoying me all day."

" I hardly count five minutes as an entire day."

Edward rolled his eyes, " Whatever."

" You're both so lazy. And you need to learn to put some clothes on! I almost saw your crack and Bella's boobs today!"

" I was wearing a bra, Alice!"

Edward Sr. looked over at us with a pointed look, " I have no problem with a party, but I don't condone sex when I am only doors down."

" We didn't have sex for gods sake!" Edward exclaimed.

" Then why was Bella in only her undergarments and you in absolutely nothing."

" He told me that he got hot during the night and just got fucking naked, okay? I wasn't even awake when he did it. And as for my attire, I had nothing else to sleep in but a dress."

The last part was a lie, but I wasn't going to tell them the real truth.

" You weren't awake?"

" My god, what we do is private between us. If I'm naked in my bed, in my bedroom, I think that is perfectly acceptable. Maybe you should knock before barging in Alice."

She glared at him, " Whatever."

" No, Alice, really. And then you just announce everything you see in front of everyone. It makes us look bad. Stop being such a tattle tale."

Alice gave Edward a sour look and, stomped her feet as she stormed upstairs to her bedroom. The loud pounding continuing all the way up the stairs.

" Stomp louder, we can't hear you!" Emmett said.

" I hate you all!" she yelled dramatically.

I rolled my eyes at her antics and slowly sat up next to Edward, who handed me a cup of coffee; made just the way that I always make it. Edward's father and Emmett lounged over on the other couch and I saw Edward Sr. look at us with a stern expression.

" I want to trust you both."

" Before Alice opened her big fucking mouth you had no reason not to. We all know how much Alice exaggerates shit. Bella and I didn't do anything last night. I got drunk off my ass, she took care of me, and we went to bed. Nothing else happened."

" Clothing attire?"

" Yeah, I was as naked as a goddamn jaybird. Bella was wearing some clothes so you don't have to worry about that, alright?"

" Bella probably stripped him down." Emmett said, " We all know how much she loves our skinny Edward over here all naked."

" Oh, yeah, Emmett. Seeing Edward naked is my absolute favorite thing, ever." I said sarcastically.

" Hey, I feel insulted here!" Edward exclaimed.

" Sorry, dude, but nobody wants to see your white ass naked self."

" What is wrong with my white skin. Fuck, you people have no taste. I'm sexy as hell."

I laughed and rested my head on his shoulder, " You are."

" God, don't keep inflating his ego, Bella. I think either his head got bigger or the room got smaller." his father kidded.

" See, they are all so hurtful." Edward said to me, leaning down to give me a chaste kiss.

" Oh, don't be such a baby."

I took a sip of my coffee and smiled at the warm feeling the spread throughout me.

" Emmett, those words really hurt."

I giggled and stood up, heading towards the kitchen with my mug in hand.

" Oh, don't leave now, Bella. He might strip down to his boxers and yell out for a beer."

" What?" Edward Sr. exclaimed.

" Emmett, I'm going to kill you."

The Cullen's and Masen's were definitely a bunch to be put together.

**Authors Note- I happen to love drunk Edward? Do you love drunk Edward? He's kind of cute in a gropey, beer-loving way.**

**Bella's outfit in my profile.**

**REVIEWS get Chapter 19 TEASERS!**


	19. Six Feet Under The Stars

**Authors Note- So, I know all of you who reviewed and got a teaser are probably wondering why our precious Edward here stabbed his beloved Isabella right in the back. Well, let's see what happened; shall we?**

**Disclaimer- S. Meyer owns all things Twilight.**

**Chapter Song: Six Feet Under The Stars by: All Time Low**

~\\~

BPOV

~\\~

Edward and I were in my bedroom one quiet afternoon; nobody was home so it was just us both together with no interruptions. Ever since Esme has been creeping around Edward's door when I'm over, and she has suddenly started taking an interest in dusting the walls and vacuuming the hallway to his bedroom on a daily basis. He's been showing up at my door after school routinely now and one night a week at my window when it's late at night. It was nice to be wanted; to know that he wanted me enough to come over to _my_ house. Granted, I'm usually alone here, so I guess it was a bonus.

We'd get carried away, and act like the reckless teenagers that we are. It was fucking nice. I hadn't encountered my father yet, I shouldn't have been so careless though. In my defense Edward was way more interesting to pay attention to.

My father had been calling up for me, but definitely not loud enough to hear; at least I'd like to think so. Well, I hadn't even thought to even bother locking my door, and Charlie had walked into my room at the exact moment Edward's hand roamed under my shirt. Fuck.

I jumped about a foot in the air hearing his loud, stern voice saying my name. Edward moved away from me and completely got off the bed, running his hand through his hair and buttoning up his jeans with record timing. I adjusted my shirt and looked over at my father, composing myself.

" Yes?" I asked.

" You have to pick up Leah later from her friend's house. She'll text you sometime. So if you aren't so _busy_, make sure to pay attention to your phone." his voice was a sneer, and the way he looked at me was one that was familiar, disappointment and anger.

" Okay."

" Can I speak to you alone, Isabella?"

" Alone?"

" I'll just-" Edward started.

My eyes glanced back at him, " No, you don't have to go anywhere."

My father looked at me sternly, " You can do whatever the hell you want outside of this house with boys, but don't you dare think you can do half of that in this house; do you hear me?"

He walked out of the room and slammed the door behind him. I put my head in my hands, completely and utterly fucking mortified. It was one thing when he said shit like that to me alone; but with Edward standing right there it made it much worse. I immediately regretted my decision not talking to him alone.

He sat beside me and pulled my hands away from my face.

" Oh, please don't cry." he whispered gently, putting his arm around me.

" He called me a whore right in front of you, Edward."

Edward laughed humorlessly, " You think I believe you are one? I wish I could deck him for saying that shit to you."

" Why does he have to make me so goddamn miserable? What the fuck did I ever do to him?"

More tears fell from my eyes and I wiped them away hastily.

" Please don't cry, Bella. I hate seeing you cry."

" Then just fucking go because that's what I feel like doing right now." I snapped angrily at him.

He attempted to grab a hold of me but I shoved his hands away, not wanting any of it. Instead he locked his arms around me and never let go, ignoring me when I tried to push him away. Eventually I held onto him and didn't let go. I didn't want him to leave, I was just irrationally angry.

Edward leaned against the headboard as I rested my head on his chest.

" You're so special, and he is so damn blind not to see how perfect, loving and warm you are. You're so smart and beautiful, my Bella. You mean more to me than anything else in this fucking world right now."

I grabbed his hand and held it, resting it near my heart.

" I hate seeing you so hurt."

" I'm okay."

" You're not."

" I'm used to it."

" That's not right."

" And I know that."

He held me closer to his chest, and I played with the hem of his shirt, slowly feeling myself drift off as his hand started rubbing soothing circles on my lower back.

_Dream_

_I sat up, feeling the wet pavement underneath my body. It was hard and uncomfortable, cold and harsh on my skin._

_" Bella!"_

_My head turned to the side and I saw Edward standing there, in the harsh rain, wearing a pair of loose jeans and a white t-shirt that clung to his body. He ran towards me and lifted me up off the ground, my black dress soaked through. The feathery tool was weighed down with the water, making it hard to steady myself for a moment._

_Why was I always wearing this dress?_

_He held me against him, frantically looking around._

_" What's wrong?"_

_" He's going to find us. We have to go."_

_He grabbed my hand and started running across the abandoned street when all of a sudden, headlights flew out in front of us. I pushed myself to run harder and we ran into a forest, coming out onto the other side within a completely different atmosphere. I felt the sharp twigs against my skin, scratching and tearing into flesh._

_The sun was shining brightly, almost blinding. Edward was across the room in an instant, wearing nothing but a pair of swim trunks as he dove into a deep pool of sparkling blue water. I looked down, still in my dress with a huge smile on my face. I played with the fabric before stepping forward into the hot sun._

_What was going on?_

_I couldn't find it in me to care._

_He came up and grinned at me, water droplets falling from his hair. " What are you still in that dress?" he asked with a laugh._

_Slowly I walked towards him, a smirk working its way across my face._

_" You don't like it?" I teased._

_Edward shook his head and I slowly unzipped the dress. It fell from my body with easy and I was wearing absolutely nothing underneath it. His eyes glazed with hunger over my skin, and he licked a droplet from his bottom lip. I jumped into the pool and broke the surface, jumping into Edward's arms as I did._

_His lip was clear of any piercings, and I touched it gently._

_" I love you."_

_I wrapped my legs around his waist and his lips went to my neck, sucking and licking the skin there. Distantly I could feel his teeth on my skin, but I was too lost in him that I couldn't find it in me to care. Even when I felt my blood trickle from my neck, I only tried to pull myself impossibly closer to him._

_I groaned his name quietly and moved against him. _

_Suddenly I heard a rustle behind me as his hands roamed over my bare, wet back. I held onto him tightly as he whispered something lowly into my ear._

_" Don't move."_

_I froze in Edward's arms and felt a blade against my back, pressing against my skin but not breaking it._

_" Edward." I whispered._

_My breathing came out in short gasps and I heard a loud scream behind me before the knife sliced into my back with the force of Edward's hand._

_" I love you." he whispered, pulling back to look into my eyes, the life flooding out of them slowly as I moved in his arms._

_He twisted the knife around in his hand and shoved it into the middle of my back, my flesh twisting and covering in thick blood. Below me I saw the water turning dark red. Edward pressed his lips to my open mouth that was open in a silent scream. _

_I finally screamed._

_End of Dream._

" Wake up, Bella!"

I gasped and sat up, my heart racing and I looked beside me and saw Edward. I let out a small scream and moved away from him. He looked almost frantic, his eyes filled with worry. Slowly he moved towards me, not to scare me and took both of my hands in his gently.

" What happened?"

" You...You stabbed me, and told me you loved me. I...We were...I could hear screaming, it was so loud."

" That was you, Bella. I heard you screaming. I was downstairs when you screamed bloody fucking murder."

I ran my hands over my face and shook myself out of it, but it was almost as if I felt the blade twisting into my back. A shiver ran down my side and Edward leaned down to kiss my forehead. I grabbed his hand and looked up at him.

" I wouldn't stab you, Angel."

I laughed, " I know. I'm just being a fucking spaz."

He tipped my face up and leaned down to give me a slow kiss. Unfortunately he didn't let us get carried away with it. I ran a hand through my hair and tried to tame my bed head.

" Why were you downstairs."

" Well, to be perfectly honest, before the screaming you were rubbing up against me and moaning; I needed some fucking water to calm down."

I groaned, " I'm sorry."

" It's fine. But I'm curious..."

" There was a pool, and I was naked. That's all you're getting."

Edward pouted, " No more details?"

" I can show you one day." I said lowly, leaning forward to take his bottom lip between my teeth.

~\\~

June 20th

Edward's Birthday

~\\~

" Happy Birthday!" I said as I launched myself into his arms

A beautiful crooked smile spread over his face," Thank you."

Edward lifted me up in his arms and placed a chaste kiss on my lips before setting me down. I hugged his torso and he ran his hands down my back.

" Are you my gift?"

" Sure, why not."

" Then I guess I have to unwrap you." he stated, pulling at the waistband of my shorts.

I smiled at his antics and grasped his hand in mine to stop him, " Later."

" I'm holding you to that."

I grabbed the gifts from the side table and deposited them into his hands. He gave me a look and raised his eyebrow. It was a look of disapproval. But I didn't give a shit. It was his Birthday and I was buying him a gift.

" Save your money."

" It's not expensive."

Edward tucked me into his side and led me into the kitchen. I saw an iPhone lying on the table and looked at him incredulously.

" How on Earth did you get an iPhone when they don't come out for another week?"

" We know people."

I rested my hand on his chest and he set his gifts down. I wished that I could have been here earlier, but I had classes today and unfortunately had gotten here as late as four because I wanted to change clothes.

" Of course you do." I told him with a grin

He sat down at the table and pulled me into his lap, handing me his iPhone. It was the first ever, and I wondered how they got it a week early. I played with it for a moment before handing it back over to him.

Esme appeared just a moment later and smiled when she saw me.

" Bella, it's so nice to see you, dear. How's school been treating you?"

" Really good. How are you?"

" Good."

Edward set his phone down and wrapped his arms around me. I rested my hand on the side of his thigh and leaned back against him.

" You look beautiful today. You always look beautiful."

" Thank you. And you look mighty handsome as always."

" Mighty handsome?"

" Yes."

I moved off his lap and stood upright. His hand discreetly ran over the curve of my ass and I smiled at him over my shoulder as I headed over to the fridge.

" Can I get something to drink?" I asked.

" You don't have to ask anymore." he informed me.

" I know."

I grabbed a coke from the fridge, poured it into a glass and sat in the stool by the island.

" Hey, Bella." Emmett said as he strolled into the room.

" Hey."

" So, what did you get that freakishly tall step brother of mine over there?"

" He isn't freakish, and he hasn't opened it yet."

Edward stood up and held his hand out for me. I took it and hopped off the stool, following him upstairs as he led me, carrying both the gifts I gave him. When we got to his bedroom he sat down on his bed and patted the spot next to him.

" Why are we up here?"

" I felt like I wanted to open these alone."

" Okay." I said softly. " It's really nothing special."

" Shh."

He opened the first one, which was a sturdy, leather bound book that was made for him to put all of his compositions into. I couldn't believe that I'd never heard him play yet, but we saw this in a little book store in Port Angeles one weekend and his eyes completely lit up when he saw it. Edward tore the paper off and flipped through the book with a smile on his face.

" I bought this for you, but you have to promise me something."

" Anything."

" You have to play for me before you leave."

His eyes met mine, " I promise. Thank you, my Angel."

The next one was a bit more of a personal gift, but it was simple. It was a silver branch like picture frame edge and in the picture were smaller pictures of both of us. I wanted him to have it when he was away, so that he would always know that he had me there, even if I wouldn't be there in the flesh.

Once he had all of the paper off; he held it carefully and looked at all of the small pictures.

" I want you to have this while you're away, so you don't forget about all of this...Us."

" Bella, this means so much to me. But I won't ever forget about you, or us. Nothing would make me forget you."

He leaned forward and put the picture on his end table. Before pulling back, he pressed his lips to mine. There was a new feeling to this kiss, like he was trying to pour out all his feelings into it. His hand grasped my chin, keeping our mouths fused together.

" You are my life now, Bella. Nothing and nobody else can change that."

I pressed my forehead to his and leaned into him. " I have no fucking clue what I would do without you. You make me feel so alive."

Edward grasped the back of my neck and pulled my lips to his. I straddled his lap and ran my hands over his shoulders and down his back. His mouth slanted over mine and he laid backwards and pulled me on top of him. I slipped my tongue into his mouth, feeling my heart rate sky-rocketing with the intense attraction and lust working through my body.

His hands moving over my body felt white hot and he left a burning trail of desire where he touched. I felt his hand push my shirt up before trailing down to grasp my thigh. I moaned quietly and pushed my body closer to his. One hand trailed up my ribs to the scoop neck of my racerback, and he pulled his lips from mine and trailed them down my neck and collarbone, pulling the neckline of my shirt down to reveal part of my bra. The cups were blue, with black lace overlaid, and around to the clasp with a bow in the middle.

" What've you got here for me, hm?" he asked, laving my skin with his mouth.

" Just a little birthday surprise."

" Is there a matching surprise below?"

I nodded, still breathless. He popped the button on my shorts and peaked down with a sinister smile before pressing his lips back to mine.

" So sexy. All mine." he growled, biting my lip and pulling back. I loved it when Edward got a little rough with me. He knew I hated being treated like a fragile doll; at least when it came to us being physical.

I ran my nails down his back over his shirt, a low growl emitting from him.

" Edward, sweetheart? Can you- Oh!"

I was quickly moving off of Edward, but it didn't matter. Esme had caught us.

She cleared her throat, " This door stays open from now on."

" Mom, seriously?"

" Yes, seriously. Edward Masen, I don't care if it's your birthday and you are nineteen. When you and Bella are in here, I want this door wide open from now on."

" Alright, if you all want a show, well, front row tickets for everybody."

" Edward Anthony." she said in a firm voice.

Before I could tell Esme she had nothing to worry about, Edward had pinned me underneath me and wrapped his arms around me.

" Whatever you say, mother."

Esme pressed the door against the stopper and left the room, looking back at us every few seconds.

" Ah, fuck."

" I don't mind a show."

" You realize this means that unless they aren't home,_ all _the fun has to take place at your house right?"

" You're already stalking me at my house.

" Stalking, huh?"

His hand ran over my ass and he gave it a squeeze before pulling me off the bed and kissing my forehead.

" You're a tease." I said, slapping his shoulder.

Edward grabbed his shoulder, " Wow...I'm...I'm wounded. That really hurt."

" You're such a smart ass."

I walked in front of him, and he started to pick up speed, and I soon found myself running full speed down the hallway. When his arm wrapped around my waist with a loud grunt in my ear, I squealed loudly. He lifted me up off the ground and spun me around a few times before setting me down.

" Uh...Hi?" Emmett said awkwardly from the top of the stairs.

" What?" Edward asked.

" You guys are...kind of weird. I'm not gonna lie."

" I can't fool around with my girlfriend?"

" Sure, just maybe when we aren't home..."

I jumped onto Edward's back and he stumbled forward a moment before catching me. I laughed quietly into his ear and he started down the stairs. My shirt had ridden up slightly, and I saw Emmett look back at me with a wicked grin.

" Nice panties, Bella! Or should I say thong?" Emmett commented.

" Oh, you like blue just like Edward does?"

He laughed loudly and Edward pulled me off of his back, " Oh, you think that's funny?"

" Maybe I'll start strutting around in blue boxers. Will that turn you on, Edward?"

" You're sick, Em. Really sick."

I was pushing my shirt down over my waistband when Carlisle walked in, and I blushed. He looked between Edward and I before his eyes settled on Edward.

" Happy Birthday."

" Thanks."

It was a really awkward exchange, and I wondered what it was about. Before I could say anything, Edward pulled me through the house, through the library and a part of the house I've seen from above but not actually entered before. He led me over to a black baby grand piano and sat down on the seat that had a leather top and black wooden legs holding it up.

" Now?"

" Sure, why not. Come here."

I sat down next to him and his eyes closed, and he took a very deep breath. I stayed quiet for a moment and then he laid his fingers gently on the keys. His eyes were closed and his head downcast. When I looked at the sheet music, the top title said ' Bella' and that was it. My brow furrowed, but the moment his fingers started to press down on the keys; I was mesmerized.

The passion in the music shook me to my core, and looking at Edward and seeing him so focused yet so relaxed at the same time was amazing. The music he was making, without even a glance at sheet music, was fucking astounding and nothing less than that.

Each key his elegantly long fingers pressed down on made me even more in a daze.

It was beautiful, so beautiful.

His finger flowed swiftly across the ivory, and the room was filled with a composition so complex, and so luxuriant that it was impossible to believe only one set of hands played.

When he stopped, his eyes opened completely and he looked over at me.

" That was...so beautiful. Wow, I can't even..."

He chuckled, " It wasn't that great, Bella."

I looked him straight in the eyes, " Edward, it's absolutely amazing. I've never heard anything so beautiful in my life."

" I wrote it for you." he said almost shyly, " I had the tune stuck in my head since I met you, and it took me weeks to get it down on paper the way I knew it in my head."

" Really?"

" Yes. It's your song."

His arm wrapped around me and I leaned into him pressing my lips to his neck for just a moment.

" Thank you."

" You're welcome, my Bella."

He stood up and helped me with him, winding his arms around my waist to pull me closely for a moment. Standing there in his arms with the loud obnoxious rain tapping on the window somehow felt right, and it was a moment I wouldn't forget.

" Edward, Bella. Dinner is ready." I heard Esme say softly.

I moved away from him, but his hand never left mine; not even for a second. When we got to the kitchen, all I could smell was barbeque. Spread out in the middle of the kitchen table was barbeque chicken, steaming hot baked potatoes and fresh corn.

" He has this every single year, and has since he was seven. His dad made it one time, and little Edward fell in love."

I smiled and sat next to him at the table. It smelt absolutely divine.

Edward was piling pieces of chicken on his plate, and decided to stop after four big chicken breast chunks. I shook my head at him and put a few things on my plate. I put butter and sour cream in my baked potato, and Esme even cooked some bacon and chopped it into bits.

She never does anything halfway.

Dinner was absolutely fantastic, and when it was over I was completely stuffed, but there was still cake left. Once the table was cleared, a red velvet cake with twenty candles on it was sitting in front of Edward. One extra for good luck.

We sung a version of Happy Birthday, ignoring Edward's refusal to all of it. He looked annoyed, but a smile was still spread over his face. He blew out his candles and everybody clapped for him, along with a loud shout from Emmett. When he looked around himself and finally at me, a smile was on his face that I could see was genuine.

" Thanks everybody for making today good."

Esme rested her hands on his shoulders and leaned down to kiss the top of her son's head.

" I can't believe that my baby is nineteen. I remember bringing you home from the hospital when you were born."

" Worst day of your life, right?" he asked jokingly

" Undoubtedly."

" I knew it."

Esme laughed and kissed the top of his head once more before pulling away.

" I love you, kid."

" I love you, too."

" Who wants cake?" Edward asked, picking up a large butcher knife that was sitting beside the cake.

" Give me that knife and maybe I'll consider." Emmett said in a jokingly careful voice.

~\\~

The wind was slow and breezy in the backyard today. I was glad that it was a Saturday, and I didn't have to spend most of my day in a stuffy classroom. I laid back on the blanket and sighed contently. The breeze was cool, in a good way, and the large trees in the backyard provided shade.

The air smelt like nature and pine.

God I missed all the peace and quiet.

I took a deep breath and felt the fresh air in my lungs. I held it in before breathing out. My fingers toyed with the end of my hair. It was getting close to the middle of my back now. I looked up and saw the leaves on the tree's shaking with the force of the wind. I looked over towards the house upon hearing the back door open and close. When I looked up I saw Leah walking towards me.

" Hey, I'm going to Port Angeles with Janie and her older sister for the day."

" Write a note and put it on the kitchen counter."

" Alright. Later."

" Bye. Be safe."

I laid in the grass for a long while before picking up my book and leaning against the sturdy tree to read for awhile. I hadn't read for fun in a long time, and I went to the Forks Bookstore and bought a few books. Out of their poor collection I found a few good books that I wanted to read.

Even though I loved spending time with Edward, especially since he leaves soon, I felt like I needed a day to myself. Yesterday Edward said he was going out to Seattle with Alice Because Esme's Birthday is this upcoming Friday and they were going shopping. I couldn't believe that it was almost July and I had about a month and a half with Edward before he left. I wanted him to stay, but I knew that if everything worked out, then we would be together in the end no matter what.

I had to believe it would work out that way, or I would be lost.

I flipped through the pages of a book about fallen angels. I still read in the young adults section. Edward laughs at my collection of vampire, fallen angels and demon books. He was more of a classic guy, and so was I, but I expanded beyond it. I needed something other than Pride and fucking Prejudice to read.

It felt like all too soon the sun was going down, and when I couldn't read the text I found myself laying on my back again, ignoring the beep of my phone signaling that I had gotten a text.

Distantly I could hear owl's calling out, but my eyes were glued to the dark sky, staring at the gleaming stars and once again thinking of Edward.

I stared up at the sky, hoping and praying to whatever is up there that I wouldn't lose him. Tears pricked my eyes and one single tear fell from my cheek. Even in a short life I felt like I'd lost so much, and I knew that losing Edward would be my last straw. I trusted that any problems we would have wouldn't break us apart.

I reminded myself it was temporary.

But I wasn't sure how I was going to survive months without him when I had barely been hanging on when I first met him.

~\\~

" Fuck. All these bed sheets are like fucking kid bed sheets. Grown men and women can sleep on twin sized beds you motherfuckers."

I laughed as Edward shoved a batman comforter set back on the shelf.

" And instead of laughing, help me!" he exclaimed.

" What do you want help with? Hello Kitty or Batman?"

He glared at me and I only laughed harder.

" Follow me."

There was a whole bunch more to choose from, he was just too impatient to take time to look around. We walked into Bed Bath and Beyond to pick up a few things for Edward's dorm room. When we came across more sheets, he let out a breath. We found him and midnight blue bed set with a silver/blue leaf pattern on it. It was neutral and was sixteen pieces; everything from sheets to pillow shams. It was a nice set, and the quality looked good so we purchased that, along with bath towels, washcloths, a waste basket, and we also got a plastic shower basket for him to put all his shower and shaving things in, and a few other necessities.

We went to the mall next and of course ended up in some expensive store so Edward could pay four hundred dollars for three pairs of brand new jeans, and then we went into express so he could have another shopping binge in there. I never knew Edward enjoyed shopping so much. I guess I never really saw his wardrobe that included something else other than skinny jeans and v-necks.

He showed the most interest when we were walking past some French lingerie store.

I argued him the entire way, but ended up with a bag on the way out, filled with silk and lace things and a boyfriend next to me smiling like he just won the lottery. Edward went into the Prada store while I went into Victoria's Secret. They had some kind of buy one get one half off on their nighties. I got a dark blue, v-neck cotton slip one with thin traps and went probably mid thigh, and a v-neck eyelet-trim nightie with white eyelet lace trim and the rest made out of hot pink satin. I never really went for that color, but it was more of a raspberry color so it was acceptable.

While I waited for Edward I grabbed a soft pretzel, and he came out with a bag that apparently held a brand new pair of fancy designer shoes and black dress pants and a few belts.

" Well, how about dinner and then we rush on home."

I laughed. " Why?"

" Because you have a few things to model for me, Angel."

" It's only three, how about we go do something fun. We've been shopping all day. Because someone got me up at the ass crack of fucking dawn."

He kissed behind my ear, " You love it when I sneak through your window. Where do you want to go?"

" Well, I need a haircut."

" No."

" No?"

His hands ran through my hair, " I like it too much."

" It's annoying to take care of."

" Let's compromise."

I glared at him, " On my hair? No fucking way."

" Yes fucking way."

" Fine. What do you want?"

He ran his finger over my cheekbone, " Stop wearing all of that black eyeliner under your eyes, and you can do whatever the fuck you want with your hair."

" No way."

" Why?"

" Because, Edward. I'm not going to change myself."

" Not you. Just that makeup."

I put my hands on my hips, " You won't like what you see anymore if I take it off."

He scoffed at me like I insulted him, " Oh, please. I've seen you without makeup."

" Have not."

" Yeah, like the time you got out of the shower at your house, you had none on and I surprised you by coming through you window. You ran after that, but I saw."

I sighed and leaned against the wall outside of the store. Edward wrapped his arms around me after dropping his bags, drawing me towards him.

" I think you're beautiful. So beautiful." He said slowly, kissing me all over my face sensually.

" Edward…"

" Please…"

" Fine." I sighed, " I won't use as much, but I will use a little."

" Where is the nearest hair place?

~\\~

I glared over at Edward as he stared helplessly at the floor. I tried to fight a smirk, but I found it weird how obsessed this boy is with my hair. I was enjoying it, my head felt so much fucking lighter. It was shorter and was about an inch below my collarbone, pieced up and layered with a bang off to the side. It was refreshing.

After she finished blow drying it and adding product, I didn't have her straighten It because I liked the weird wave my hair has so I just left it. As I stood up and headed towards the front to give the lady a tip and check, Edward was staring at the floor still with that same helpless look on his face.

" Edward, stop being such a pussy." I whispered to him.

His eyes shot to mine, " What did you call me?"

" You heard me." I told him, sliding over a check to the hair lady with a smile.

" I am not."

" Yeah you are, stop whimpering at the floor."

He scoffed, " Yeah, okay."

" Let's go get my tongue pierced." I said, opening to door to head out.

" Really?"

" Let's do it."

**Authors Note- So, how many of you actually thought Edward actually stabbed Bella when you got that teaser? Next chapter is the drama I promised. And trust me; it's coming in heaps so next Friday is going to be great. I know this chapter was updated late, but it's been a long day, long week, but I got it up so let's just be happy about that, hm?**

**Bella's outfit linked in my profile.**

**BELLA'S HAIR! Linked in my profile so check it out. Edward is still whimpering as we speak.**

**If you REVIEW! You will get a TEASER! To the next chapter!**


	20. Hello Cold World

**Authors Note- Alright. This chapter is a pretty intense one so hold onto your seats kids! Hope you had a good week and are enjoying the holidays!**

**Disclaimer- S. Meyer owns all things Twilight.**

**Chapter Song: Hello Cold Word by: Paramore**

~\\~

June 25th

Monday

BPOV

~\\~

" I'M GOING TO KILL HIM! WHERE THE FUCK IS HE?"

" Edward, calm down. It's okay. Look, he ju-"

" No, it's not okay! He shouldn't have laid a fucking hand on you! He has no FUCKING right!" he shouted, tearing down the stairs quicker than I could even process.

Edward rushed out of the front door and I followed after him, but I wasn't quick enough.

He was in his car before I could even tell him the entire story of what had happened.

~\\~

The Night Before

~\\~

I walked across the cement pavement, cutting through the grass quickly. I knocked on the window twice before opening it up. James was laying across his bed with his laptop in front of him, paying attention to that. When my shoes hit the ground he looked up and smiled.

" Hey. Haven't seen you in awhile."

" I know. I'm sorry. It's just...Between Edward and summer school..."

" You don't have time for me. I get it."

" That's not it and you know it."

James quirked his eyebrow at me, " Did you get your tongue pierced?"

I stuck it out at him, " Yeah."

He got off his bed and walked forward to embrace me. It felt like he was holding onto me as if I'd disappear, and it was different from all hugs that he's ever given me. I rubbed his back for a moment before pulling back.

" Is everything okay?"

James nodded, " Yeah. I just missed you."

" I missed you, too."

I sat down on the edge of his bed and he sat on the couch. He looked honestly like there was something bothering him. There was never really a time where he ever looked this troubled, and I wanted to know what was going on.

" What's going on?" I asked him.

He sighed and ran a hand through his hair, " Nothing, it's nothing. Want a blunt?"

" Actually, not tonight. I can't stay too long. Summer school is in the morning so I have to get up early."

I grabbed a cigarette and James let me borrow a lighter. I sat on his recliner and leaned back, blowing smoke into the air in small rings.

" So, how's things going?" he asked.

" Uh, good. Everything is pretty good. You?"

" Alright. I got classes set up for the community college in Port Angeles."

" Really? That's great."

" I'm glad to get the fuck out of here. I've been apartment hunting."

" Yeah. Edward and I have been getting his stuff for his dorm."

James nodded and then looked at me, " Are you guys planning on keeping everything up while he's gone?"

" If by keeping it up you mean us staying together, then yes. It's temporary, and I know we're going to miss each other, but I hope we can do it."

He sighed, " Yeah."

" I just, I don't know...Love him, too much to let him go completely."

It was the first time I admitted that I loved Edward out loud. The first time the thought came to mind, and a big part of me felt like it was right to say it. I knew that our relationship was still only early, but I did really love him. He meant the absolute world to me in just this short amount of time.

" Do you really think that he is the one for you?"

The way he said it almost sounded desperate, and the way he was acting was kind of weirding me out a little bit. Of course I'd seen James in a really low mood, and at a point where he's been angry and livid, but he looked like he was between crying and desperation. Something was definitely going on and I wasn't about to let it slide.

I thought about his question for a moment before meeting his eyes, " You know I'm not one for all that love shit, and believing in fate but...I think he is. There is nobody else that I can imagine being in his place."

" But I mean...He's only your first boyfriend technically, you don't want to explore anything else?"

" James, what's this about?"

Before I could blink he had stood up, " You can't honestly tell me that you have no idea."

" I don't. You're acting weird. What's wrong?"

He looked over at me, and he sighed, " I don't want to ruin this. But I can't keep it in anymore..."

" Ruin what? James, what the fuck is going o-"

I could even fucking process anything before he came forward and pressed his lips to mine. I could feel hands gripping the back of my neck, pulling me closer. His lips were desperate, and they didn't hold the deep passion and warmth that Edward's always did to mine. I didn't kiss him back. I put my hands on his chest and pushed him off of me. He stumbled back and I looked at him, eyes wide.

" I'm in love you, Bella."

" No, you're not...James, you're just confused right now."

" I'm not confused. I've loved you for over a year now."

My heart was beating wildly, and I took in this information, not knowing what the hell to do with it.

" Why did you push me on Edward? Why didn't you tell me?" I asked. It wouldn't have changed the fact I didn't feel that way about him, but I still wanted to know regardless.

" Would it have made a difference?"

" James, I love you...As a friend, like a brother. But, I'm not _in_ love with you."

The look on his face was something that I wouldn't ever forget. He looked heartbroken, and I had caused that. He was my best friend, and now I was also the one who was breaking his heart.

But I couldn't help how I felt. I knew that I didn't love James like that. There was absolutely no question about it from the beginning. I'd never even had a crush on him at any point. He'd been like the older brother that I never had, and I cared about him; but apparently not in the way that he wanted me to.

" I have to go...I'm sorry." I said quietly before quickly walking to the window.

He grabbed my wrist and I turned around.

" You can't tell me that after all these years you haven't felt anything towards me."

" I haven't. James...Edward is...He means the world to me, he's everything to me and I care about him more than I can even explain. And I care about you, too, but not like that. Not in a romantic way. And I couldn't do this to him…You're his best friend James, and mine, too. This is fucked up."

" You can't even think about it?"

" There's nothing to think about." I replied.

" Bella, I love you. I just...please don't let this ruin us."

" I can't be to you what you want, James. And I won't make this hard on you."

He sighed and released my wrist. " I'm sorry."

I stepped forward and wrapped my arms around his neck in a hug. James held onto me tightly and kissed my temple.

" I'll give you time, alright?"

He nodded and let me go. I climbed out of the window and walked to my car in a complete and utter daze.

I couldn't believe everything that had occurred in the past ten minutes. My head was spinning and I wanted nothing more than to tell him that it would be okay, but I knew that I couldn't be around him right now at this time.

Kissing him felt so wrong, and there was a big part of me that wanted to tell Edward. I couldn't keep that from him, because eventually when he went to see James it would all spill out. The sooner I said something the better, but I was waiting until tomorrow regardless. I wanted to tell him in person so he wouldn't completely freak out.

I knew that with Edward, though, he'd freak out anyways. Whenever he see's any guy look at me he gets all possessive, and this was even worse. I hoped that considering James was his friend he would ease up, but also as being his friend Edward might get even more pissed. Something with bro-code or shit.

When I got home, I ignored all the texts from Edward and got into bed, staring up at the ceiling wondering what the fuck to do.

One of my great friends just admitted that he was in love with me, and my boyfriend was probably going to want to beat him up for kissing me.

~\\~

Present Day

~\\~

My fingers fumbled with the ignition to start my truck up, and once I looped around the driveway, I started speeding down the long driveway. Edward was already out of sight at this point and I banged my hands on the wheel and shouted out profanities.

His reaction was definitely not anything to be expected, or maybe it was.

_" Can we talk about something?" I asked, sitting at the edge of his bed._

_Edward had a look of complete and utter panic on his face, his eyes wide._

_" What's wrong?"_

_" Edward...Ja-"_

_" Are you breaking up with me? Fuck, this is a joke right?"_

_My eyes widened along with his and I stood up and walked over to him, grasping his hands tightly in mine and looking into those beautiful green orbs._

_" No, Edward. I'm not breaking up with you. Don't worry about that."_

_He took me into his arms and breathed deeply into my neck. I rubbed his back soothingly and turned my head to kiss his neck._

_" But I do have to tell you something." I told him._

_He pulled away from me and I felt my hands start to shake. I took in a deep, shuddering breath before looking right at him and telling him exactly what had happened._

_" I went to James' last night. He was acting weird and I...I tried to get him to tell me what was up and he just..." I paused, " Edward, James told me last night that he is in love with me, and he kissed me. I swear I didn't kiss him ba-"_

_" WHAT? He kissed you?" Edward shouted, moving away from me._

_" Edward, hold on. I'm not done!"_

_" What you said was enough." _

_He grabbed his car keys and started rushing out of his room quickly. I followed after him._

_" Edward, stop! I'm not done talking."_

_" I'M GOING TO KILL HIM! WHERE THE FUCK IS HE?"_

I followed down the road towards James' house, knowing exactly that's where he was headed. I was definitely pushing the speed limit, but it was empty around here anyways. Edward was probably already there with the speed he drives at, but I prayed to god that he wasn't fucking there.

With a deep sigh I pressed down on the gas and turned into my neighborhood. My hands were shaking and my legs felt tingly. When I pulled up to James' house I saw that Edward's car was already there and I saw both of them standing on the porch obviously yelling at each other. I parked quickly and got out of the car, storming up towards Edward.

" What the fuck is wrong with you?" I yelled at him.

" Stay the hell out of it." he said shortly.

" Don't fucking talk to her like you own her. Before you she was her own person, now you've got her wrapped around your finger."

" That's not true." I argued with James.

" You're a controlling, possessive jerk. She deserves someone so much better than you."

" And you think your better?" Edward laughed humorlessly, " Who was the person that got her into drugs? Drinking? You're fucking high or drunk more than half the day, obviously you are a real prince."

I pulled on Edward's hand, but he was still rooted in his spot.

" You don't know me." James said lowly.

" Yeah, I do. You're just a fucking sell out, and all you wanted out of her was to get into her pants. Let me give you a clear picture, it's not going to happen. Stay the fuck away from her, and if you so much as try to touch her again I'm going to fucking kick your sorry ass."

" That's the thing, Edward. You're all talk."

James' fist launched forward and clipped Edward in the jaw. Edward stumbled back from a moment, blood streaming from a cut on his lip. I stood between them and suddenly saw Edward's breathing become erratic and very weird. It was similar to when him and Carlisle got into it awhile ago.

" Stop it. Both of you."

Edward started to stumble down the stairs, walking towards his car on unstable feet.

" Edward, come here." I said, running after him.

All of a sudden his breathing hitched audibly, and he was grabbing at his chest frantically before his body fell down to the ground. Color started to drain from his face and I screamed, trying my hardest to catch him so that his head wouldn't get the impact. I was able to gently bring him down to the ground, but he was still grabbing at his chest for something.

" Call 911! Something is wrong." I screamed at James.

Edward's eyes were wide, and I could tell he was struggling for breath. I had no idea what was going on. His face was pale, and turning a pale blue color.

" Edward, Edward, please. What the fuck is going on?"

James was frantically talking on the phone and Edward's eyes then started to close and I yelled his name again, picking his head up to put on my lap so that he would wake up or it would do something. I picked up his wrist and his pulse was weak and only getting worse.

" Edward, open your eyes! Oh my god, Edward." I cried, leaning down to press my forehead to his.

Moments later an ambulance showed up, flashing red lights and two paramedics rushed out. They were asking me questions as they put a mask over Edward's face and looked him over. I was pushed out of the way, trembling and scared.

" His heart rate is dangerously low and he is many percentages below his breathing rate. We need to get him to the hospital immediately.

Everything happened so fast. They put him on a gurney and before I could even process anything I was in there with him, shuffled off to the side of him while they worked frantically on him to help him breath. Tears streaked down my face and I held onto his hand, which felt a little colder than it usually did.

When we got to the hospital they rushed him through the front doors, and I was told that I had to stay in the waiting area.

The only thing that could pass through my mind was that I was losing him. I struggled for breath and sat down in one of the chairs, my head in my hands. My fingers fumbled for my phone and I called Alice. I told her that she needed to get everybody to the hospital, and she immediately hung up the phone afterwards.

My body was shaking and tears streaked down my face, sobs escaping me every few minutes.

I had no idea what had happened, but Edward had told me before that he can't get over worked, and that he always has to constantly watch himself. I'd never seen him so upset then when he was standing in front of James, and I couldn't even grasp what happened.

Another sob heaved out of me and I wrapped my arms around my legs.

" Ma'am." I heard a quiet voice say.

I looked up and wiped my face, seeing a kind looking receptionist standing in front of me with a kind smile..

" Can I help you?"

She handed me a few Kleenex's and a bottle of water. I took it from her gratefully and wiped my tears with the tissues.

" Thanks."

" It's okay. I'm used to it. If you need anything you can come to me."

I nodded and wiped my face once more.

Just then I saw Esme rush in with Emmett and Alice at her side. When her eyes met mine she immediately walked over to me, worry evident in her eyes and Alice was teary eyed and leaning into Emmett.

" What happened, dear?"

" Edward got into it with a friend of ours, James, and he got really, really upset. His breathing started to get all weird and then he collapsed on the ground. The paramedics said that his heart rate was dangerously low and that his breathing wasn't good."

Esme gasped and Alice rushed over to wrap her arms around her. I closed my eyes and wrapped my arms tightly around my legs.

" Where's dad?" Emmett asked.

" He's working today." Esme said between quiet sobs.

Appearing very much out of nowhere was Carlisle, speak of the devil. He looked disheveled and worried, glancing at all of us with a look that said he had a million questions.

" I was paged that Edward just came into the Emergency Room by one of my co-workers. What happened?"

Emmett explained everything to him, and once he was finished Carlisle was looking towards me for more answers in detail.

" Why was he so upset?" Carlisle asked directly.

" Our friend James admitted to me last night some feelings for me and he kissed me. I told Edward and he didn't let me finish before he was leaving the house. By the time I got to James' house Edward and him were already going at it. After James punched him Edward started to struggle."

" This is why Edward doesn't need relationships right now."

Something inside of me clicked and I shot up out of my seat, much to everybody's surprise.

" You think you know what's best for him, but you don't. He doesn't need anybody tell him what to do, and I don't need to hear this shit! The person that I love more than anything could be fucking dying and I have no control over it. Fuck you."

I ran out of there before I could hear any response.

I sat outside on a bench, ignoring the drizzle. My head rested on the side of the building and I took a deep breath of the humid air. I couldn't believe that all of this was happening, and it was like it was flying past me before I could breath.

All I could think was that Edward couldn't breathe before. The color draining from his face and how pale he was is something that I'd never forget. I'd never forget the feeling of not knowing what to do to help him. I wiped the tear that fell and closed my eyes, shaking my head.

I felt like I had been sitting there forever waiting to hear something.

I wanted him to be okay. I wanted him to open his beautiful green eyes so that I could tell him that I loved him. Tears flooded my eyes once more when I remembered how cold his hand was. It was all so fast. My head was still spinning in circles.

My thoughts were frantic. What would I do if I lost him?

Fuck...

I found myself laying on my back on the bench, staring at the sky.

He was going to be okay.

He had to be okay.

Losing Edward wasn't an option. He was going to be just fine. The doctors could do something to help him.

Right?

~\\~

Alice came rushing out of the doors more than an hour later. It felt like days.

She looked around before her eyes landed on me.

" Bella, he's awake. He's been asking for you."

I quickly sprung up.

He was asking for me?

He's alive?

I'd never run so fast in my entire life to find him. Esme, Emmett and Carlisle were already gone from the waiting room seats and I followed Alice quickly down the halls. My heart was pumping, but I could still feel hot tears running down my face.

When we stopped at a room, she opened the door and I quickly walked in. I could hear a heart monitor beating in a regular pattern, and as I walked forward, there he was.

He was laying in a bed, looking frail and so delicate than I'd ever seen him. I could see a tube coming out from his side and there was a machine of some sort on the ground that was connected to it. Esme and Carlisle were both seated and Emmett was leaning against the wall.

I rushed to his side and grabbed his hand immediately. His green eyes found mine, tired and unfocused. There was an obvious bruise on his jaw from where James had punched him, but I didn't care about the bruise, I only cared about the fact that he was actually breathing right now.

" Thank god. I thought...I thought..."

" Shh, it's okay." he breathed quietly.

I pressed my forehead into his shoulder and he turned his head to the side to kiss the top of my head.

" What happened?" I asked.

" His lung collapsed. Edward has always been at risk with this happening, which is why he has to generally keep calm and not get over worked; his medicine can't always prevent this. There is a tube hooked up inside of him to help his lung for just a little while"

" I'm sorry." I told him, tightening my grip on his hand.

" It's not your fault. He shouldn't have..."

His heart monitor started to rise and I looked at him. " It's okay. I know, babe. Just calm down, alright? Everything is going to be okay."

He slowly started to calm down and he laid his head back on the pillow, his eyes looking over at his family.

" Can you give us a moment?" Edward asked them.

" I don't think..." Esme trailed off.

" I want to be alone with her. Please, just for ten minutes."

They nodded and shuffled out. Esme kissed his forehead before walking out, and closed the door behind herself. I sat down on the edge of the bed and rested our linked hands in my lap. Edward took a slow, even breath and met my eyes.

" I should've listened to you before storming out."

" I wish you would have. After he kissed me and told me that he was in love with me, we just talked it over Edward. I told him that I didn't feel the same, and that you were just...it for me. And I also told him that I'd give him some time to just get over it or something."

" I hate that he kissed you." he said in a whisper.

I leaned forward and pressed my lips to his just for a moment.

" Edward, it didn't matter. It didn't mean anything to me."

" I just hate that he...I don't want anybody else to kiss you besides me. You're mine."

" I am yours. Always."

He slowly moved over, very carefully, and motioned for me to lay beside him. I rested my body gently next to his and put my head on his shoulder.

" I thought I was going to lose you."

" You can't get rid of me that easily."

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath.

I spent as much time as I could at the hospital before I had to go. I wanted to stay with him, but I knew that I couldn't with hospital hours and summer school tomorrow. The doctors said he would have to stay here for a few days to make sure that everything was going alright. Carlisle said that maybe he could get him out sooner than a week.

All that mattered to me was that he was alive and breathing.

~\\~

The past few days all I've done is either been at school, work, or at the hospital with Edward.

I had talked to James at one point, who wanted to go see Edward to make sure he was alright, but I didn't think it was a good idea. Both of them said some pretty shitty things about each other, and Edward really didn't need to stress right now, and I was trying to make things as calm as I could.

He was getting irritated having to be in a hospital bed, but he was still so frail looking. Esme was mostly bringing him food because he didn't want to eat hospital food, but at the same time he was just eating really light right now. I knew that he wanted to be home, and the first few days were definitely the hardest. Edward was sleeping a lot though. Almost every time I came into the room he was napping. The doctors said it was normal. His body was restoring itself, and resting would help his body heal quicker, but the doctors said that his lung was doing alright now, and he was breathing just fine. It made the days go by quicker when he was asleep. Sometimes he wouldn't even notice when I'd crawl in with him and leave at the end of the day. We never talked at all, but I was glad that I had some purpose being there.

Friday evening he was discharged from the hospital and taken back home. I went with them because Edward insisted. Once he was upstairs I helped him settle in and he went to take a shower. He looked like himself, just still weaker, and he was going to have a scar from where the tube was put in. Everybody was a little on edge about him being back home, especially Esme. I could understand why, she was just afraid of something else happening to him, but so was everybody else.

I made his bed and pulled back one corner for him, and set the glass of water I got him on his end table.

" You don't have to fucking do that, you know." he said suddenly.

I looked saw him with just a towel wrapped around his waist. My eyes travelled over the planes of his chest and beautifully carved abs.

I mentally berated myself.

_He just got out of the hospital, and you already want to jump him?_

_I never stopped wanting to jump him..._

" I just want everything to be nice for you."

" Everything is fine. Can you get me my pills from my right drawer, there are two bottles, I need one from each."

" Yeah, sure."

I'd never leafed through Edward's things before. When I opened the drawer, I was a little taken back by all the colored packets in there.

" Uh, hey, Mr. Player, what's with all the condoms? Fuck, is this boysenberry? Strawberry, Desensitizing? Studded?...Glow in the dark? Are you serious?"

Edward choked out a quiet laugh, " What, you don't like variety?"

" I don't know..."

" You're cute."

" Shut up."

I grabbed his pills and took one from each, and closed the drawer quickly.

There had to be at least a hundred fucking condoms in that damn drawer. That's all that was in it besides two pill bottles thrown on top of it.

" You are blushing so bright red, Angel." Edward said as I handed him the pills.

" Sorry."

" Look at me."

I hesitantly looked up at him, " I can by just regular if that makes you happy."

I playfully slapped his shoulder, " You are so fucking mean to me."

" That drawer provides much fun, just wait."

" I'm not going near your 'studded' condoms."

" Baby, those are especially to make it better for girls."

" Aw, how sweet of you. When did you acquire all of these?"

" Well, I fucking tossed all of them out when I moved, and I don't know, when Emmett and I get bored and go out to Wal-Mart or do something, we think it's funny to just buy random condoms."

I gave him an incredulous look. " You don't think you're being a little presumptuous?"

He smirked, " No, not at all."

" I'm not a whore."

" Not even just for me?"

" Maybe just a little bit."

He laughed and I sat down on the side of his bed while he took the pills and put on a pair of boxers.

" Stop staring at my ass." he chided as he pulled the boxers up his legs.

" Stop being naked in front of me."

" It would be more fun if you weren't wearing anything."

I laughed and unzipped my hoodie, tossing it on his lounger.

" This is all you're getting." I told him, motioning to my tank top.

" Take off those damn jeans."

" Yes, sir."

I stripped them off and tossed them on the lounger over my hoodie. My underwear was just a pair of dark blue lace covered panties.

" God, I've missed you."

" I've been with you every day, Mr. Sleepy."

He smiled appreciatively and behind me I heard his bedroom door opening.

" Hey, just wanted to ma- Oh my, I'm very sorry."

I saw Carlisle covering his eyes, " If you need anything, then let me know. Bella, please put on a pair of pants and leave this door open. You aren't allowed any kind of activity that gets your heart rate going up and makes breathing harder; you know this."

" Alright. Now can you please leave the room, my girlfriend feels fucking uncomfortable."

I grabbed a pair of Edward's boxers while he tried to stifle his laughs.

" That was so embarrassing."

After putting on his boxers I climbed into his bed to settle in. He laid next to me after turning the lights off and I moved to the other side of him so that I could curl into his side. His left side had stitches and a patch over it from where the tube was, and I didn't want to hurt him.

" How do you feel?" I asked.

" Better. I hated that damn hospital."

" How about your stitches."

" Bella, I'm okay. I promise."

I rested my head in the crook of his neck, " You don't understand."

" I don't?"

" I thought I lost you. You scared the ever living shit out of me."

He rubbed my back gently, " I'm okay now, so don't worry."

~\\~

I woke up in the middle of the night hearing Edward's moaning and groaning in pain. I sat up slowly and he was moving around restlessly. His stitches must be hurting, they said that they would have pain meds for him, and I stumbled to the bathroom to get his medicine and to fill up the water glass.

When I woke him up, he winced as he sat up.

" Take this." I said, handing it to him.

He took it without question and laid back down, his hands shaking. It looked like he was starting to panic over the situation, and I didn't want him to be scared. But I understood why he was scared, if my lung collapsed I would be cautious myself.

" You're okay, Edward. Don't worry." I said quietly.

That didn't seem to help much so I reached over and turned on his bedside lamp. I stared into his eyes, holding both of his hands in mine.

" I'm right here, babe."

" I don't know why I'm..."

" I know, I know. Just calm down, everything is alright."

I leaned forward and kissed his jaw, running my fingers over his knuckles.

For about ten minutes I stayed awake with him and made sure he kept calm. I ran my fingers through his hair, which seemed to help a lot and soon enough he had drifted off to sleep. I lay against his side with our hands linked on his stomach, my eyes fluttering closed as I drifted off once again.

Luckily, I awoke later on at around seven. It felt great to sleep in for once. I had today off, not exactly on the best of terms, but for today and tomorrow the diner was closed. One of Charlotte's great friends who lives in California died on Wednesday, and Garrett is also a long time friend, so they had to head out to help with preparations and be there for the funeral. Obviously they are the cooks, so we couldn't exactly open up, there were no back-ups, and it was better off to just close and re-open on Monday.

I got up quickly, having to relieve my bladder, and I was thirsty as hell.

I left Edward asleep in bed and walked quietly downstairs. I grabbed a glass from the cabinet and filled it up with just a little bit of apple juice. When I turned around after putting the jug back in the fridge, I saw Carlisle standing there. A gasp of surprise emitted from me and I grabbed my chest to slow my heart.

" I'm sorry."

" It's fine."

As I was walking away I heard him say my name quietly. I turned around and looked at him, feeling awkward. I hadn't spoken to him once since I basically yelled at him, and then finished off with saying 'fuck you'.

" I wanted to apologize for what I had said to you when Edward was first in the hospital. What I said wasn't right, and very out of line. Whoever Edward decides to date isn't any of my business, and I hope you can forgive me for the way I've acted. It's been inexcusable."

I was honestly surprised that he was apologizing. He was so uptight when it came to Edward, and especially our relationship; hearing this made me glad that he could just get over it and accept it, even if he didn't like it. But I also knew that I had to apologize for what I said, I was very much out of line saying what I did.

" I'm sorry for what I said to you at the hospital also."

" It's forgiven."

Nodding at him, I started to walk away.

" Bella?" he said.

I looked back at him, " Yes?"

" Please don't break his heart. I know that he isn't my son, but he's been through a lot, and I don't want to see him in any more pain."

" I wouldn't ever break his heart." I stated firmly.

He nodded and I made my way back upstairs. Edward was still asleep, very soundly, in his bed. The comforter though, was pushed to the end of the bed and tangled in his ankles. Both of his long, slim legs were exposed and his boxers were bunched up in a way that made me laugh. I grabbed the heavy comforter and heaved it up, tossing it over Edward. It must have startled him because he woke up with a look of surprise on his face.

" What's wrong?" he asked, his voice rough with sleep, but alarming.

" Nothing. Go back to sleep." I said quietly, dragging the blanket over him and myself as I got into bed.

Edward turned on his side before laying on his stomach with his head on my chest and his left arm wrapped carefully around me, not to stretch his arm out too far and hurt his stitches. I rested my hand on his back.

" I hope you understand how much you mean to me." he said quietly.

" Of course I do."

" Have you talked to him?"

I knew who he was talking about.

" Just to let him know that you were alright."

" He doesn't give a fuck."

" Edward, he's your friend, of course he does."

" He's not my friend. He wasn't my friend the moment that he decided to kiss you."

I sighed and stared up at the ceiling.

" How many times do I have to tell you that it meant nothing."

" I know that, Bella. You've told me before, okay? What pisses me off is the fact that he actually did it, full well knowing that he was kissing his 'friends' girlfriend."

" It felt like I was kissing a family member." I told him, " It wasn't like kissing you. No sparks or warmth...or the passion. It sounds fucking cheesy as hell, but I don't ever want to kiss anybody else but you."

" Good. Because you won't if I can help it."

Edward moved up a little and pressed his lips to mine. I rested my hand gently on his cheek and slanted my mouth over his. His tongue ran over my lip, the smooth silver ball in the middle of his tongue making me shiver. Tentatively, he touched his tongue to my newest piercing. It was still sensitive, but that didn't stop me from enjoying it.

I hummed against his mouth and pulled away, " We shouldn't get carried away."

" Bella..."

" I just don't want you to exert too much energy."

" So, when can I exert energy?"

" Soon." I said.

He leaned forward to kiss me, and I pecked him on the lips. My hand covered his mouth and I sat up and smiled at him. Edward kissed my palm before setting it on his chest, over his beating heart. His hand reached up to play with the tips of my hair.

" You're so beautiful. I'm so lucky to have you."

" I was thinking the same thing about you."

" I'm beautiful?" he asked with a quiet chuckle.

" Mhm."

We laid in bed for a bit longer before deciding to get up. Edward went into the bathroom to shave, but I heard him struggle and got up. I saw him in the bathroom, only using right arm, because lifting his left arm was hurting with the skin and muscles stretching. He was grunting and making frustrated expressions. If I didn't feel so bad for him I'd say It was cute.

" Here, let me help." I said as he rubbed shaving cream over the lower half of his face.

" I can do it." he said stubbornly.

" Oh, really? Just let me help you. It's just shaving."

I perched myself on the counter and he sighed, handing me his razor.

" Don't cut me."

I rolled my eyes and moved it over his jaw slowly. In no time he was quickly all shaved and his face was smooth. I rinsed off the razor and kissed his clean jaw.

" Was that so hard?"

" Yeah. I feel helpless."

" You are not helpless, Edward. It's not like I have to help you shower."

" That might actually be fun..."

" I bet. Now speaking of showers, I need to take one."

" Well, I need to change and brush my teeth."

I rolled my eyes and started to undress. Once I was done I opened up the shower. I noticed a familiar red bottle of hair stuff in the shower. It was my strawberry scented shampoo, with the bottle of conditioner next to it. I leaned out of the shower and looked at him in the mirror.

" You bought my shampoo?"

" I did."

" You didn't have to."

" I know."

I smiled and resumed my shower. Once I was finished, I dressed quickly into a pair of shorts and a flowy v-neck tank top. My shorts were a dark wash, and my top was white. I grabbed the lotion from my bag and put some all over my legs and arms. I blow dried my hair and Alice let me borrow her flat iron. After a little bit of makeup I was done.

" Fuck, this bathroom smells amazing." Edward groaned as he went in to wash his hands.

I laughed at him, " Thanks."

" Mm, raspberries." he whispered into my ear as he took me in his arms carefully.

" Mm...cologne?"

He kissed my forehead and stared down at me. " Thanks for taking care of me, even if I hate it."

" I'll always take care of you. So get over it."

Edward smiled at me and held me tighter to him. I didn't want to let him go, but I knew I couldn't hang on forever.

**Authors Note- So, many things happened. We found out James was in love with Bella. Edward didn't like that. Edward's lung collapsed and he IS getting better. I was going to drag it out and leave you all hanging, but I still have MUCH more in store in the crazy department so I gave ya'll a break.**

**Next chapter we'll check in to make sure Edward isn't dying!**

**REVIEWERS get TEASERS for the NEXT CHAPTER!**


	21. Strange Terrain

**Authors Note- Happy Friday!**

**Disclaimer- S. Meyer owns all things Twilight.**

**Chapter Song: Strange Terrain by: Circa Survive**

~\\~

BPOV

~\\~

The summer seemed to be flying past quickly, which made me both sad and excited at the same time. I was dreading the fact that Edward would be leaving all too soon, but excited that in less than a month I would be graduating and be done with high school. I was already finished with all of my summer school classes, and now I had time to finally enjoy my summer, or what was left of it to this day. August 18th is when I would graduate, and two days later Edward was going to be leaving for New York.

Today is July 23rd, a Monday.

Edward and I were inseparable more than half the time. We were out all the time, seeing movies, going out for ice cream and looking around Port Angeles just for fun. I was excited to be able to be spending so much time with him, and I think both of us were relishing in it while we had it.

Ever since his lung collapsed, Edward has been doing so much better, but he's also been seeing a doctor regularly now instead of Carlisle getting the prescriptions from the hospital. Though they knew there wasn't a chance of it happening twice in such a quick amount of time, they were still going to see a doctor now once every two weeks for a little while to assure that everything was going alright. He was still taking things slow at times, but in general things were alright. His heart and lungs were healthy, that's all that mattered to me.

Everything seemed to be calming down, but I shouldn't be so sure that it would ever stay that way. All the days of spending time in the sun and being with Edward, napping in his arms and watching movies, would hopefully always be remembered. I knew these days were soon numbered.

July flew by with a blink of my eyes, taking Fourth of July with it; I went with the Cullen's and Edward to downtown Seattle and saw the most amazing firework display I've ever seen in my life. That entire day was fantastic, spending time with Edward in the city was fucking amazing. His family was great, too. Carlisle was finally starting to understand that I'm here to stay.

I'd never been as happy as he was making me, and I never wanted it to end. I'd already started sending in applications to college's for the winter/spring semester, and when I filled out my Columbia one, I felt confident that things would work out for me. I also applied at NYU and Fordham along with it. I knew that if Columbia fell through, that NYU would be my second option. I was just praying to god I'd get in either one.

I'd been working very hard though, and with summer school over, I had passed both classes with an A in Advanced Physics and an A+ in Senior AP World History. I had done well in both. The small graduation was going to be held just inside the gym, with only thirty one students on August 18th, exactly a month before my eighteenth Birthday.

I was pretty excited to have high school all behind me, but if I did end up in New York as planned, I would miss James, Angela and Jess a lot and even Ben. They were great friends to me, but I knew that no matter what I'd always keep in touch with both of the girls, and James, too.

When I awoke the morning of August 2nd by the sound of my phone ringing, I reached over and saw that it was my mother's cell phone number. I'd actually been talking a lot with her. She's wanted me to come down to Florida to stay with her for a week, and I'd been considering going through with it to spend some time with her. She's been bugging me about it often enough and I think I needed a break from Forks.

" Hello."

" Hey, sweetie, I've got some new for you!"

" Yeah?"

" Yes! I got you two round trip tickets to come see me, I sent them in the mail just a few days ago and wanted it to be a surprise but I couldn't help myself! I know you probably want to know why I got two, but I want to meet that boyfriend of yours that you've been wrapped around. Do you think his parents will be alright with it?"

I was surprised for a moment, " Really?"

" Of course! As long as it's okay with his mom, then it's all set. If she wants to talk to me, you can give her my number any everything! But it's all set up for you sweetie."

" Yeah, okay. When?"

" Tomorrow morning. They should be in the mail today, and all the information is written down for you both. I know its last minute, but I hope you'll come!"

" Of course. Thanks, mom. I'll talk to Edward later, alright?"

" Okay, sweetie! I love you!"

" Love you, too, mom."

I hung up the phone and laid back on my bed, a smile spreading over my face. I hoped that Edward would want to go, and that he would be able to come with me. I sent Edward a text and headed downstairs to get something to drink and some food. A plate of hash browns, scrambled eggs and bacon later, Edward had texted me back and I ended up calling him.

He sounded happy when I told him about coming to Florida with me, and sounded sincere about wanting to meet my mom. When I went out later to get the mail, the tickets were in fact there and I was excited to see them. The flight was at 9:05AM tomorrow, and I walked inside, holding both tickets in my hand at precisely the moment my father walked down the stairs.

" What are you holding?" he demanded.

" I'm spending a week with my mom."

" Then why are there two?"

" Because my boyfriend is joining me." I said briefly.

" Of course your mother would let him come along." he scoffed.

I glared at him, " She has interest in who's a part of my life. Not that you know anything about that."

Walking past him I headed upstairs and shut my bedroom door behind me and glanced at the tickets. If the plane left just shortly after nine, we'd at least have to get there an hour early to get out bags ready and go through all of that security mess. Therefore we would have to be up by six thirty, seven o' clock.

I had called Edward, but he was already five minutes away from the house when I had called him. He had said that I might as well just stay over at his house and then we can leave from then. I knew that I had to get all of my shit together quickly. I leafed through my drawer, grabbing a few pairs of shorts and jeans. It was all happening at a fast pace, but I needed this.

" Hey, can you grab my silver pumps, Edward."

" Mhm." he hummed, reaching into my closet.

I folded a shirt into my bag and grabbed another article of clothing.

" What'd you dad say about this?"

" It doesn't fucking matter. I just want to get out of here, and spend some time with you and my mom."

He came up behind me and put his arms tightly around my waist, kissing the shell of my ear.

" That sounds good to me, too."

I turned around in his arms, staring up at his tall form. He bent his knees down to lift me up and he kissed me slowly. I put my arms around his neck and my legs around his waist. His hands move to grasp my thighs so I don't fall, but his lips never falter on mine. I twirl my fingers in the hair at the nape of his neck and slant my mouth over his; feeling his heart racing wildly against mine. He pulled away from my mouth and leaves a burning hot trail of kisses down my neck, and I can feel him moving towards my bed.

Once I'm laid across my mattress his mouth takes purchase on mine once again and I hold him to me closely. When I feel his hand move underneath my shirt, that's when there is a knock on my bedroom door. Edward groans quietly in annoyance and I push on his chest and look towards the door just as Leah is opening it.

" Oh, sorry!"

" It's fine. What do you need?"

" It's not important. I'll talk to you later."

She closes the door, and before the confusion even sets in Edward is on me again.

" I want you." he groans deeply against my lips.

" Later, okay?" I said quietly,

" Now."

I smile at his desperate tone and pull away from him, giving him a chaste kiss.

" Look, I need to finish packing, and I also need to get a hold of work to get that sorted out. How about you head on home and I'll see you there later, okay?"

" I have a better idea. I'll pick you up and we can go out to dinner tonight and then go back to my house. We haven't been out on a date in forever, and I want to take you out."

My smile widened and I nodded, " That sounds great."

" Okay, then I'll see you later."

He gave me a quick kiss and slipped out of my bedroom, closing the door quietly behind him. I smiled and grabbed a shirt from my closet. It took me just a short while after to pack and get everything I wanted into my bag. Once I had finished I immediately called work and got into the shower.

It was very last minute, but I was a good employee, and Charlotte said that they could work something out and to enjoy my vacation.

For tonight I dressed in a pair of medium wash skinny jeans, a plain white t-shirt, my cropped black leather jacket, and a pair of black leather boots to wear over my jeans. For some color I put on some gold and turquoise bracelets and a gold necklace to go with my Linea Pelle Dylan leather zip tote in turquoise.

My makeup was simple, a light teal eye shadow, some black eyeliner and mascara and a little bit of a light pink cream blush and some pink lip gloss. My nails already were a light turquoise. The outfit was simple yet nice for going out to dinner tonight. I curled my hair in big waves, and loosened it up a bit and pinned my bangs back in a braid against my head.

Later on that night once I was ready I headed downstairs to wait for Edward. I brought my bag with me that was filled with my clothes and everything for this week. Since I was staying at Edward's tonight I was going to need my things in the morning since I wasn't coming back here. I put my makeup case in the bag and zipped it shut, looking around my room once more before leaving.

" Where you going?" Leah asked when I entered the kitchen.

" Out to dinner with Edward. And I'm actually going to be spending a week with my mom in Florida with him."

" Really? That's cool."

" Is everything okay?" I asked her warily.

She shrugged, " Yeah."

" Okay."

I set my bag down on the counter and leaned against it. I put my phone on vibrate and tossed it in my bag and then heard the doorbell ring not even a minute later. Leah rolled her eyes when I raced to the door, but I always felt like it was a first date every time we went out. I know it sounded fucking cheesy, but it was true

Just as I got to the foyer, my father appeared out of nowhere and scared the shit out of me. I jumped back and he wretched the door open almost aggressively. Edward seemed a little taken back to see it wasn't me there, but he still stood tall.

" Hello, Mr. Swan." he said in a low, monotone voice.

My father didn't even say anything to him; he stood there staring at him, which made Edward shift uncomfortably.

" Come on." I said quietly, reaching for Edward's hand.

Instead he reached out his other hand to me and he gave me a beautiful bouquet of red roses. My eyes widened and I took them from his hands and Edward walked into the house and past my father.

The front door shut sharply and made me wince, but I made my way to the kitchen and kept Edward's hand firmly locked in mine.

" Isabella!" my father yelled sharply.

I handed Edward the bouquet and he looked down at me.

" Take this for me."

" Bella, let's ju-"

" ISABELLA!"

I walked to the kitchen and saw my father standing in the middle of the kitchen.

" You're car payment was due a week ago. I'm not paying it for you. Why didn't you get it to me?"

" It slipped my mind. I'm sorry."

" Sorry won't pay the goddamn bill!" he shouted at me.

" I'll get you the money right now, you don't have to fucking yell at me." I replied in a snarky tone.

" I don't need your attitude."

" Then stop asking for it."

I spun on my heel and grabbed my checkbook, Edward's eyes were wide and he looked shocked. I wrote out the check for my car payment, which is always the same amount each month. Once it was written out, I slammed it down on the counter and grabbed my bag.

" There's your fucking money, _dad_. I'll see you in a week."

" Don't talk to me like that. You should be happy I don't throw you out on your sorry ass. I'm glad I don't have to see you for a week. Get out!"

Edward followed me out of the house quickly, grabbing my bag for me as I put my purse on my shoulder. He unlocked the car, tossed my bag in the back and set my flowers on the seat. I got into the car and put on my seatbelt, quickly, and rested my head in my hands.

When he got into the car, he didn't do anything. Didn't turn the car on, say anything, or even move until he saw me wipe a tear.

I never wanted him to see that. I didn't want him to see the way that my father treated me, and the way we interacted when we did talk. I hated it.

He took off my seatbelt and pulled me into his lap, wrapping his arms tightly around me. He kissed the side of my head and started to rub my back gently.

" I had no idea it was that awful."

" Can we just go. I want to get the fuck out of here." I murmured.

" Yeah, let's go."

I sat back in my seat, but Edward never let my hand go.

" The flowers are beautiful. Thank you."

" You deserve them."

He leaned over the console and gave me a kiss before starting up the car. We drove into Port Angeles and Edward parked infront of Michael's Seafood and Steakhouse. We got out of the car and proceeded to head inside. I've been here about twice, and they have some pretty good food.

When we were seated and waited on, Edward got the Chicken Marsala, and I got the Chicken Pesto Ravioli. We talked quietly over the food, not taking too much time eating dinner, but not rushing. Once we finished Edward graciously paid and we then went back to the car.

Before going home, we stopped by at a local ice cream place in Forks and went back to his house with two strawberry shakes. His house was dark when we got in, so we quietly ventured upstairs with my things. I had found a vase in the kitchen and put my flowers in Edward's room on his end table.

I changed into some sleep clothes and washed my face before getting into bed and sipping my shake until it was empty. I brushed my teeth, even after Edward insisted that it was fine. His hand moved up and down my thigh as I traced patterns on his chest.

" You're leaving soon." I whispered.

" I know."

" Take me with you." I said quietly.

" If I had a choice to get an apartment off campus I would do it, but I can't for now, Angel."

" Make me forget. Even if it's just for a little while." I murmured, leaning forward in his arms to kiss him.

His fingers twisted in my hair and his hand moved down my side before hooking on the hem of my shirt and pulling it up slowly; his fingers stroking my newly exposed skin.

I knew that I could forget for now. But eventually I would have to face it head on.

~\\~

Edward and I got up early that next morning, stumbling into the hot shower together. We were both tired and wanted to sleep more, but we had to get to the airport. Carlisle graciously offered to drive us to the airport, which Edward and I both were very grateful for; I was surprised he offered.

I stood next to Edward, fixing my makeup as he shaved. I let my hair dry by itself in curls, and just ran some product through it so it wouldn't frizz. Luckily it turned out smooth. I put on minimal makeup and went into his bedroom to get dressed.

I slipped into a strapless, tube style summer dress. It had a pretty rose pattern on it with light pink, orange, grey/purple roses on a white background. It clung to my chest and flowed out nicely to about mid-thigh. I wore my black leather boots from last night with it, and my cropped black leather jacket. I put on a blue beaded necklace and put my sunglasses on top of my head.

As I grabbed my bag for carry on, I felt Edward come up behind me and wrap his arms around my waist.

" You smell so nice."

My fingers ran over his hands, " You smell pretty nice yourself." I replied with a chuckle, turning around in his arms and burying my face in his chest. He smelt like musk, cinnamon and just Edward. It was his own unique smell, and it was incredible.

" Oh, yeah? Well you smell like fucking...raspberries and Bella, and vanilla or something. All I know is that it's amazing."

" I said that out loud?" I asked, not knowing that I described his smell verbally and not just in my head.

" More like mumbled it against my chest."

He went into the bathroom to grab his things to put in his bag. Once he was finished he zipped up his bag and grabbed it from the floor, also grabbing mine for me after I put a few things in there. Once we made sure we had anything, we headed downstairs. Carlisle was already there, and so was Esme with just baked chocolate chip muffins.

" Mmm, so fucking good." Edward said, grabbing one from the plate.

" Watch your language, you. I'm sure Bella's mother doesn't like a boy with a potty mouth, especially the boy dating her only daughter."

" Of course, mother." Edward said, kissing her cheek.

I poured Edward and I a cup of coffee and we sat down at the table, ate a muffin and then headed out. The drive to the airport only made me want to sleep, and when we got to Port Angeles, Carlisle dropped us off, wishing us a safe flight and telling us to be very careful.

Security was a total bitch, but when I saw that our seats were first class, I almost flipped my shit. I couldn't believe that my mother went all out for us, but I would have to thank her when we got to Florida. I'd called her before we got onto the plane, between security and the terminal just to let her know we were on our way.

Security took forever because they had to check my bag, we had to take our shoes off, hand them our phone and all this other shit. Honestly, it was completely and utterly ridiculous, but we had to get it done. Once I was taking my seat on the plane, Edward sat next to me in the nice, white leather chairs and I set my bag on the ground next to me.

" That was crazy." I grumbled.

" I don't get it. What, do they think that we keep drugs and bombs in our shoes? That's-"

" Fucking nuts." I finished.

" That's right. Damn, I need a cigarette."

" Amen."

~\\~

The minute I walked off the plane I could feel the heat. I'd never been to Florida, once. I've never even been to Phoenix, where my mother was at first. Come to think of it, I'd never visited my mom since she left Forks.

Edward's hand linked with mine as we found ourselves in the cool Airport. It was fucking hot outside, but I shouldn't have been that surprised. It was warm enough in Forks during summer, but here it was hot as fucking hell. As we were walking towards baggage claim, I felt his hand squeeze mine.

" Are you nervous?" I asked him as I heaved my bag off the big conveyor belt.

" Kind of."

" Don't be nervous, babe. She'll love you."

_Just like I do._

Whoa, where the fuck did that come from?"

" You think so, huh?"

" Yeah, I do."

" Well, your dad?..."

" Once you meet her you'll see their nothing alike."

He grabbed his bag and put the strap over his shoulder, wrapping his arm tightly around my waist. As we walked through the Airport towards the entrance, where we were meeting, I could hear her loud voice and I smiled and headed outside, the sun hitting me immediately.

She was standing by her car, wearing a pair of shorts, a white tank top and a straw cowboy hat over her shoulder length curly hair, and some weird obnoxious necklace, but it was very much like my mother. Of course she was super tan; she basically lived in the sun nowadays.

" Bella!" she shouted

I didn't even get a chance to put my things down so that I could give her a proper hug; she embraced me tightly and kissed my cheek. I hugged her back just as fiercely as she gave, and she pulled away and smiled at me.

" I've missed my beautiful daughter. See, I told you I'd find a way to get you here! I'm so happy to see you, sweetheart."

" You, too. I'm happy to be here...And, mom, this is Edward Masen. Edward this is my mother, Renee Dwyer."

When my mother's eyes landed on Edward, they widened and she leaned towards me.

" You didn't tell me he was this tall. I feel like a smurf!" she whispered quietly before extending her hand to Edward and smiling warmly.

" It's so nice to meet the boy my daughter has been fawning over. You give the term tall, dark and handsome a run for its money."

I think if Edward did, he would be blushing right now, but he kept composed with a charming smile on his face. He was pulling out the big guns, I could tell. Edward really wanted to impress my mom, and even though he didn't have to; it meant so much to me.

" And it's a privilege to meet you, Mrs. Dwyer. Bella has always spoken so highly about you."

My mom grinned, " Aren't you quite the gentlemen, and call me Renee. Now, let's go kids!"

Phil popped the trunk for us and Edward and I put our things in the back. He lifted my things in the back for me and shut the trunk firmly when he was finished, leaning towards me with a smile.

" She's like you, when you aren't acting all I'm-a-badass-bitch-don't-fuck-with-me."

" But I am a badass bitch, and don't fuck with me."

He discreetly smacked my ass, and leaned down to kiss me before getting into the car.

When we got into the back, Edward's legs had no fucking room. He had to sit sideways and bend them out towards the middle. I tried not to laugh at him, but he could see I was hiding it. He glared at me while my mother played twenty questions with him.

Edward amused her with answers, and she just about squealed every time that he would grasp my hand in his.

Jacksonville was definitely different from Forks. The sun shone brightly in the clear blue sky, with the slightest wind. Palm tree's were fucking everywhere, and when we were near downtown Jacksonville, the buildings downtown were so very unique. I'd never been a place this warm; I've only been to Forks. I enjoyed watching all of it.

It was along the ocean where my mother lived. She's sent me many pictures since she's moved here but none of them gave the actual view justice.

When we pulled up to her house, it was a ranch house that was all red brick and a black roof. The shutters were all pristine white and near the matching white front door had a beautiful garden, full of flowers, shrubs and bold flowers going up tall metal stands for vines to grow freely up.

Phil pulled up to the driveway and we stepped out. The heat hit me intensely, and I knew that Edward probably was more familiar with this. In Chicago he at least had all the seasons, with Forks, all the seasons blend together, winter is probably the only one that differs because it's gets colder and snow falls.

The trunk was popped and I grabbed my bag out of it and set it on the ground.

" Must be something to be able to see the sun." my mother teased me as I put my carry-on bag over my shoulder."

Edward took my bag before I could get it myself and Phil opened up the front door as I followed after them. When I stepped into the house, I was hit with the scent of something tropical and bright. It was homey though.

The foyer was nice and open, with medium colored wood floors and a pretty ornate rug in the middle. A beautiful crystal chandelier hung above, center in the room. To the left was a hallway and to the right it was open in two spots. It opened up into a dining room, and on the other wall in the dining room there was an opening into what I could faintly see; a living room.

I set my things down and my mother showed us through the house. The kitchen was forward and off to the left, along with a small powder room. It was a very nice kitchen, and then there was a sliding glass door, and the left wall of the living room, the same wall the sliding glass door was on, was all glass, and then it split off into dry wall back to the kitchen and then there was a small table near the sliding glass door.

All the wood in the house was medium colored, but my mother had grey granite counter tops, a white leather couch and a glass coffee table. There were also plants scattered around. All of sudden I heard bounding steps behind me and something jumped on top of me.

" FUCK!" I screamed shrilly as I came in contact with the enthusiastic creature.

I knew that my mother had a dog. Actually, it was Phil's dog, but I hadn't been expecting it.

" Watch your language, Isabella!"

" Well if it didn't fucking attack me like a goddamn oaf then I wouldn't have freaked the hell out."

" Bella!"

" Sorry, sorry." I said, reaching out to pet the obnoxious golden retriever.

" Indie, no attacking!" Renee scolded.

When I looked over at Edward he looked amused. I pet the dog gently and walked towards the sliding glass door.

The view of the ocean was breath-taking. The back patio was very nice, with two white lounge chairs off to the right with a few plants behind them, and a glass table with an umbrella and nice chairs surrounding it in the middle, with a grill off to the side. The water was so blue that it was almost unbelievable.

" Come on now, let me show you your bedroom!"

We were led back to the foyer, and we picked up our things. There were just two doors, but both were very elegant, white French doors. She opened the one on the right and the room was beautiful.

The walls were a marine blue, with white and green accents all around the room. There were white dressers, end tables and carpet. The bed was a mixture of the three, and there were green curtains and blue lamps on the end tables that were on either side of a king sized bed.

My mom never does anything halfway.

To the left was very open bay window, and to the right was a closet and another door, which led to a bathroom that she had told me, near the corner of the room on the same wall of the door to walk in, was a long white couch with a quilt tossed over it.

" I know that this isn't responsible motherly behavior, but both of you can stay in this room. I don't want Edward on the couch out there, and I can't very well put my daughter on the couch so you can share. I trust you both to be responsible adults and to not take advantage of this. I know either way someone would be sneaking out to sleep together anyways."

" We won't, thanks mom." I told her, setting my things down. Edward put his bag on the bed and smiled at my mother.

" Thank you very much, Renee. I appreciate your hospitality greatly."

She smiled in response, " Of course! I'll leave you to settle in for awhile!"

It was twelve thirty here, which was a pretty good three hour time difference from Washington. I was completely exhausted from a straight through, five hour flight. I put my bag on the bed and unzipped my bag. I figured I could just put my clothes away and not have to wait until later.

I took the three bottom drawers in the dresser, and Edward took the top. The dresser was tall, like Edward's, with a flat screen on it. I put my things in the drawers and used the hangers in the closet to put up my shirts and a few dresses in the closet. As Edward hung up a few of his things, he smiled over at me.

" I feel like a married couple." he said with a laugh as he finished hanging one of his black button ups.

" I bet." I said as I finished with my last clothing item. I grabbed the rest of the things from my bag, like my hair tools, makeup, shoes and a purse I'd brought with me. I put my shoes in the closet, and put a few of my things in the bathroom drawers.

About twenty minutes later I was finished, and found myself laying across the bed passed out. Edward kissed my forehead and told me he was going to go see my mother for a bit before leaving- letting me get some much needed rest.

~\\~

I was later awoken by Edward telling me that my mom had dinner ready. I was still so exhausted, and I could tell he was, too. I got up and walked to the kitchen tiredly. Edward must have taken my boots of for me earlier because I was barefoot and my cropped jacket was off also.

" What were you up to?" I asked him as we walked to the kitchen.

" Nothing too exciting." he replied.

On the table was a white plate full of chicken Caesar wraps. She had cut each in half and there were ten half's there. My mom smiled when she saw me and gave me a hug.

" Did you have a good nap, sweetheart?"

" Yeah, and th-"

" What would you like to drink, Bella?" Phil asked, walking towards the fridge.

" Oh, water is just fine."

" Edward?"

" Water is good."

" We can talk later." my mom said, taking a seat after kissing my cheek.

We sat at the table in the kitchen, it was less formal than the one in the dining room.

Dinner was really good, and it was absolutely great to be spending time with my mother. Edward seemed really comfortable, which made me even happier. With my father, he's always tense and nervous, and I'm the same; but more or less always an angry person being in that house in general.

Once we had finished with dinner, I helped my mom with dishes and she soon whisked me away to talk. Edward said he was going to take a shower and he went to bed, thanking both Phil and my mom for everything. My mom had taken me out back. The weather cooled, and there was a very nice breeze that felt nice on my skin. All the plants and tree's ruffled with the air, and the water rippled.

" Oh, Bella...He is such a respectable young man you've found yourself." my mother started.

I'd never heard that before.

" Yeah, he's...He's something else."

" I'll admit, I was a little bit wary because of his appearance, but when he came out to talk to me while you napped, he was nothing short of a gentlemen. I can see how much he cares about you. At the sound of your name his eyes just brighten."

I smiled and twisted my fingers together.

" I'm glad you like him."

" Oh, I already adore that boy. Did you worry?"

" It's just...with Charlie...Dad...Whatever...He hates him; it's obvious. And last night we got into it and he told me; 'You should be happy I don't throw you out on your sorry ass. I'm glad I don't have to see you for a week. Get out!'. It was all over the damn car payment. It was a few days late and he started yelling at me; right in front of Edward."

" Are you serious? Sweetheart...Look, I know you don't want to leave Washington because of your friends, and now your boyfriend; but I don't like the thought of you being there. It hurts me so badly to hear how he treats you. Can't you even consider coming to stay with me until college, Bella?"

" I can't, mom...I just can't. Especially with Edward. I don't think I could physically just leave." I said quietly.

" Bella, I know you care about him but..."

" He leaves for college really soon. I just want to spend as much time with him as I can. It's hard enough knowing that I can't go with him. I don't know what I'm going to do when he leaves."

" I think maybe you should consider coming to stay with me. We have room for you here, sweetheart. And I'd love to see my daughter more."

" I know, mom."

She smiled sadly and embraced me, " I just want you to be happy, that's all."

" He's really good to me. I'm happy."

" Good. Now, how about you get some more sleep and tomorrow is a brand new day."

" That sounds good."

My mom embraced me one last time and we headed inside. When I got to the guest bedroom, Edward was already passed out in bed; fast asleep. I brushed my hair and my teeth, and quickly washed my face. I hung my dress on a hanger and put on a racer back tank top and a pair of shorts.

I crawled into bed carefully, and Edward had automatically turned over in his sleep and curled up against me, beating me to the punch. I ran my fingers through his hair once before setting my hand on his back and closing my eyes.

**Authors Note- I hope you all enjoyed the chapter.**

**Happy Holiday's to everybody. I hope everybody is having a wonderful season, and I will be back for another update next Friday! I love you all.**

**Reviews get teasers, it's that simple!**


	22. Monument

**Authors Note- Waiting to be all ' Thank you guys' for the end Authors Note. Soo enjoy!**

**Disclaimer- S. Meyer owns all things Twilight.\**

**Chapter Song: Monument by: A Day to Remember**

~\\~

BPOV

~\\~

Slowly, I felt a hand drag up my waist, pushing my shirt up with it and fingers teasing my skin. Goosebumps broke out all over my body and I moaned quietly at the feeling, slowly turning over to lie on my stomach. Instead of moving me, he pulled the back of my shirt up and explored my skin. A single finger ran down my spine and I shivered. They moved lower to touch the waistband of my sleep pants, pulling at the elastic band.

I knew exactly where this was leading, but I knew I had to stop it. My mother trusted both of us not to have any funny business, she trusted us. I wasn't going to break that by fucking around in her house…Even though I wanted to very badly. Edward was too tempting for his own good.

" Not here." I told him sleepily, linking my fingers through his to stop his wandering hands.

" I can't touch you?" he whispered in my ear.

" No."

His hand moved down to grab my ass and I squeaked quietly before shoving his hands off of me.

" Is it because you can't resist me, hm? Because the fucking moment I touch you a certain way you'll go crazy."

" Stop fucking with me, Edward."

He wrapped his arm around me and pulled me into his side, and before I knew it he assaulted my lips and gripped onto my waist. The feeling of his lips on mine already had me lost, and I felt my body leaning against his. He used his free hand to pull the thin sheet over us and conceal us from the world. I gripped his hair in both of my hands and pulled on it, feeling his twirling the tips of my hair.

I slanted my mouth over his and plunged my tongue into his mouth, relishing in the fact that despite it was the morning, his breath was still sweet and cool. Our kiss went from slow, deep and romantic, to tongues twisting and frantic kisses. I was sure to other people it looked like we were trying to swallow each others faces.

That was hot, right?

Edward pushed me backwards onto the bed to dominate the kiss, and I immediately responded, using one hand to grip his bicep for leverage. I'd never tire of this feeling. How my entire body tingled and it felt like I was a live wire. The world around me was gone, there were only two people and that was it.

Both of his hands moved to touch both sides of my face, and I arched my back to try and be closer to him; but he had me pinned down underneath him securely His hand slipped down once again to grasp my ass, his hand dug underneath the mattress and me. I moaned loudly into his mouth and wrapped my arm tightly around his neck, holding him impossibly closer to me.

I felt his teeth capture the silver ring in my lip, and he pulled back slowly. It stung, but the deep attraction outweighed it. He leaned forward and sucked my bottom lip into his mouth; moaning and moving his body into mine.

" Fuck! We can't. Not here." I said regretfully as I pushed on his chest.

" Okay, okay...Sorry."

I wrapped my arms around his neck and hugged myself close to him, " It's my fault too. I'm sorry."

My head rested on his chest and he clung to me in return. I hooked the back of my knee around his hip and felt his hand move down my leg.

" I just can't help myself. You're so fucking sexy."

I laughed quietly, " I could say the same thing."

He kissed my neck softly and I closed my eyes to revel in the feeling. When he pulled back, he was staring into my eyes deeply.

" I think every time I fucking look at you, I just start to fall in love with you more and more each day."

His words left me breathless, and I stared at him; waiting for him to tell me he was kidding or to start laughing; but he was serious. I reached up and touched his jaw softly, running my finger tips over his lips to marvel at the feeling of his smooth skin.

" Wake up! I've got breakfast served!" my mother asked excitedly

Edward and I untangled our limbs from each other and I turned myself to face the door, running my hand through my hair.

" We'll be out in a minute."

" Okay."

She left the doors open and I slid out of bed. As I put on a sweatshirt over my tank top, I heard Edward say my name softly from behind me. When I turned around and saw him, he had already put on a pair of sleep pants to cover up, and a wife beater. But what I noticed first and foremost, was the worried look that was etched across his features.

" Was I? Should I have...Bella, I didn't mean to-..."

I walked up to him, keeping my eyes locked on his the entire time.

" I'm falling in love with you, too."

I've already fallen.

He lifted me up into his arms and kissed my forehead. " It feels amazing to finally admit it." he breathed

Once he set me down we walked out towards the kitchen. My mother had a plethora of stuff on the counters. I had no idea that my mother could even cook. There was everything from hash browns to bacon. I loaded up my plate, and I saw my mother's wide eyes as Edward kept piling on food.

She should have thought twice before saying that we could take as much as we wanted. Edward likes to eat, yet he is the skinniest guy I've ever known.

When Edward sat down, his plate was full to the brim; to the point where I couldn't even see the plate ontop.

" I didn't know a boy so skinny could eat so much." my mother said, taking a seat at the table with a cup of coffee.

" Neither did I." I commented, smiling at Edward.

" I've got to keep my strength up if I want to keep up with this girl."

I rested my hand on his leg and squeezed his knee.

" I'm definitely a handful." I said sarcastically.

My mother smiled, " Well, today I figured we could go out and venture around the strip malls, some places by the beach, and maybe get some lunch. I can't wait to show you guys around!"

I laughed at my mother's enthusiasm and we finished up breakfast and went to get dressed. I took a quick shower, knowing that I had to go out and get some stuff for my hair. Leave it to myself to forget my shower things but not my hair stuff and damn razors. I used Edward's instead, since I have before, and called it a day.

When I was finished in the shower, I opened the door to let the steam out and Edward was lying across the bed on his back, his head popping up when he saw me

" Hm...That smells familiar."

" I'm sorry. I forgot my things and I-"

" I'm only teasing you, Angel."

With the towel wrapped firmly around me, I went to the closet to get dressed. I put on a pair of dark wash shorts, and a strapless dark blue lace top that clung to me like a second skin. When I grabbed my converse, lacing them up after they were on, Edward's eyes widened.

" What the hell are you wearing?"

" Clothes?"

" Hell no. There is no fucking way you are going out in public with just that top."

" It's fucking hot outside, Edward. I'm not wearing a hoodie."

" Go change your goddamn shirt."

" Edward, I'm not changing my shirt just because you have some weird insecurity. Last time I checked I was your girlfriend, nobody else's."

" Bella-"

I ignored him and walked out of the room. Only a moment later he came back carrying my thin tan cardigan that I had hung up. He was glaring harshly at me, holding the cardigan out to me with a pointed look on his face.

" Take it."

" You aren't my father!" I exclaimed.

" I know that. I'm not fucking stupid. Now put the damn sweater on."

" Why?"

He sighed, " Nobody needs to see your goddamn boobs besides me, alright? You are mine. I don't need the entire state of Florida seeing something that is only for my eyes."

I scoffed at him and he threw it at me. I caught it, glaring at him with my arms over my chest.

" Stop being so stubborn!"

" Hey, hey. What's going on in here." My mother interrupted, entering the room just then.

I glared at Edward, " Nothing! Edward is being ridiculous aren't you?"

He scoffed at me, " You need to stop being so damn stubborn. Put it on."

" Put what on?"

I sighed and looked at my mother, " Edward doesn't think that my upper attire is appropriate. And he has some ridiculous insecur-"

" I'm not insecure! I don't need all of Florida looking at my girlfriends breasts, okay?" he said in a demanding tone, using his arms in a wild hand gesture. He looked fucking ridiculous.

My mother laughed into her hand, " I'll let you both work it out."

" There's nothing to work out. I'll put it on, happy?" I said in a frustrated voice, putting the cardigan on over the top. I pushed the sleeves up and spun on my heel towards the outside. I slammed the sliding glass door shut behind me and walked out onto the patio.

I stood there for a moment, staring out at the deep blue ocean before me. Something about it was really peaceful; no wonder my mom loved it here. It felt like all the frustration and anger just melted away and was flowing off into the waves. The light breeze ruffled my hair, and I pulled it out of my face and gazed along

Behind me I heard the door opening up behind me. Before I could check to see who it was; I felt two familiar arms wrap around my waist, and an even more familiar body pressing itself up against my back. I stilled and didn't do anything.

" Can you not understand me at all? Not even just a little."

" Please, just..."

I pushed his arms off of me and turned around. He looked hurt from me pushing him off, but I was hurt too.

" Edward, I'm yours. I belong to you, and you belong to me. I don't care who stares at me, that doesn't change anything. I want you, always. And I don't want to fight with you. I don't want to spend our last few weeks together fighting."

" Is that what this is really about?"

" What?"

" Is my leaving why you are getting so emotional? Even before the fight with your dad you've been so emotional and worried all the time."

Before I knew it, tears were streaming down my face and he picked me up in his arms and held me.

" Talk to me. Please talk to me because I don't want to spend this vacation with you being like this."

" I'm so fucking scared that I'm going to lose you. After your lung collapsed and even the fact that you're leaving; I don't know what to do. I feel like I'm just waiting for you to leave. Like I'm sitting here, next to you but in any fucking moment it's going to be ripped away from me.

" Bella, I'm not leaving you. God, Bella...Baby, I could never leave you. You're my angel and my everything. I want to take you with me. I want it more than I could even tell you, but I need you to trust me. I need you to trust us. We're going to make it. We will."

" What happens when someone more beautiful comes along. Someone smarter and your age, who plays beautiful music and doesn't swear and act all tough."

" For starters, just because your over a year younger...Well, I don't give a shit about that; it's irrelevant. And there is nobody more beautiful than you, or smarter. And I don't give two shits is you can't play a musical instrument. You are the only woman that I want, the only one. And I love your dirty mouth, and your bad-ass attitude. Bella, I picked you because I wanted you just the way you are. You're fucking perfect for me. When I wake up in the morning, you're the only person I want to see. I can't even explain…Being with you, the way I feel…It's the best I've felt in all my life; I've always felt like there was something missing and then when you came along I didn't feel like that anymore. It's fucking cheesy as hell but you make me feel more alive; like I can be who I am and people accept me."

" When I got bailed on because I was depressed about my syndrome; it as a total blow. I thought, fuck, no girl is going to want me because yeah; it depresses me and sometimes I let it get to me. I always thought that they just wouldn't care, but with you around I don't get depressed, I forget all of the shit that's happened in my life and I can just be with you. Fuck, Bella, you're everything to me; everything. No matter where I am in this world I'm always going to love you."

I wrapped my arms around his neck and tried not to get overwhelmed by his speech. He kissed the side of my head

" I'm sorry I'm acting like a crazy person."

" I shouldn't have demanded you put something over your shirt. I'm sorry."

I shook my head, " It's fine. It's okay."

He set me down on my feet and kissed me softly, cupping my jaw with one hand, and his other hand tangled in my hair. I wrapped my arms around his slim waist and pulled his body flush against mine.

" You mean the world to me, do you know that?" he whispered quietly to me after pulling away.

" I do. And you mean the world to me, too."

I felt his lips against my forehead and I dropped my arms from around him. His hands went to the front of me, and I felt him button up the few buttons on the cardigan. I laughed quietly and he smiled.

" All of this is mine." he declared, taking my hand in his.

" You've got that right."

" And I will always be yours."

I smiled up at him and we went inside quickly, both of us knowing that everything would be alright.

~\\~

Days seemed to pass us by quickly.

The time spent in Florida with my mother was a fucking blessing if anything.

We saw everything there was to see in Jacksonville, and even went to one of Phil's baseball games.

My mother had forced me out shopping for a day, and also to a spa. I didn't even want to re-live what my mother had forced me into at that place.

My own damn mother suggested that I get waxed.

And you could probably guess what exactly got waxed.

I cringed at the memory, and at her words.

_' Bella, sweetheart, it only hurts the first few times, you'll be just fine!'_

I was in pain, and almost dying of embarrassment when I had to stand in front of the lady who did it. Okay, so maybe in the end it would be…okay…and I might ACT like a tough ass bitch, but standing in front of a stranger with your pants, and underwear, off it just awkward.

And the spa also wasn't the end of the day of fun. Even though most of it I was miserable, my mother and I talked a lot that day, and of course, she wondered about Edward and mine's...activities.

The main reason she asked was my mother's constant worry. She didn't want me to end up like her; being pregnant at eighteen and having limited options in life. Of course she trusted me to be responsible, but she kept pushing the option of birth control on me. I ended up just promising her that I'd take precaution and take care of it myself. Luckily, she dropped the subject.

After that fun day, the rest of it was basically fucking bliss.

Edward had actually got a tan. And I had burned once and then got a tan, but Edward looked even better than I did with a tan. His pale skin was now a light tan color; and he looked more alive.

I found myself lying on the beach next to him the day before we go back home. He was laying on his back in the sand, and I rested my hands on his beautifully tanned chest.

" You look sexy with a tan." I commented.

" Oh, yeah. I think the same about you."

I rolled my eyes at him and moved off of his chest. I got up and moved closer to the water, leaning back in the wet sand, feeling the water wash up my body. I felt him sit next to me, linking his hand through mine.

" I'm going to go pick up some lunch, kids!" I heard mom shout.

My mother poured more lemonade in our glasses before going inside, smiling at us. Edward pulled me out into the ocean and we fooled around in the water a bit to cool off. The water was warm, but it was still really refreshing, and fun with Edward with me.

Once we were done in the water we sat in the back patio in the shade. Edward grabbed my hips and brought me in to sit in his lap. I leaned back against his chest and closed my eyes. He rested his hands on my stomach and traced small patterns on my skin. Recently, we've kept the kissing and touching behind closed doors; doing nothing but maybe hand holding or sitting closely in front of my mother and Phil. I didn't want to look like a completely sex obsessed teenager, though on the inside I was waiting for the night to come so that I didn't have to act all coy and reserved.

" I'm going to miss being here. Especially my mom."

He brushed my hair away from my ear and kissed my neck softly. " I'm sorry, Angel."

" It's not your fault. I'll be okay."

Edward turned me around to straddle his lap and I wrapped my arms around his neck.

" I'm glad you're here with me though. Being able to spend time with you has been the best."

I saw him smile warmly at me, " I'm glad I'm here, too. And spending time with you has been amazing."

We went inside afterwards, and I slipped on my cover-up quickly. My mother had picked up some lunch and I was pretty starved. She had just gotten some sandwiches and put together a quick salad. Edward and I took a seat at the table across from her and she was smiling sadly at me.

" Well, I've really enjoyed my time my time with you both. I'm sad that this is our last lunch together."

I felt the same as she did.

I didn't want to leave.

And I didn't want Edward to either.

~\\~

Later on that day I found myself sitting outside with my mother again, the sun slowly going down and falling behind the ocean. The sky was a mixture of blue, orange and pink, and there wasn't a single cloud in the sky. It was so different from Forks. I loved it.

The air was calm around us, and there was not a sound in the air but the waves washing up and down on the sand.

" Your relationship with Edward...I'll admit, I'm worried."

Worried?

" What's wrong? A few days ago, I mean...What can I do?"

" I'm worried about you...and Edward."

She looked almost apologetic, and I didn't know what to say exactly. I thought things were going okay.

" I know we've talked about you both, but you two are more serious than I'd be thinking."

I frowned, reviewing the last few days we've been here. Edward and I had barely touched - in front of her, at least.

" There's something...strange about the way you two are together." her eyes were troubled, and her forehead creased, " The way he watches you- it's so protective. Like he's willing to throw himself in front of a bullet to save you or something."

I fought a laugh, " That's a bad thing?"

" It's just different. He's very intense about you- I don't really understand your relationship."

" I think you're imagining things, Mom." I said slowly, not even understanding myself.

" I wish you could see how you move around him."

" What do you mean?"

" The way you move- you orient yourself around him without even thinking about it. When he moves, even a little bit, you adjust your position at the same time. Like magnets...or gravity...satellite, or something. I've never seen anything like it."

I laughed, " Are you reading mysteries again?"

She flushed and looked at me, " I'm being silly, aren't I?"

I didn't completely understand what she meant by everything that she had said, but I smiled at her anyways, loving her despite all of her craziness.

" Not silly - just being a mom."

" I just don't want you to get hurt, sweetie."

" I know, mom...But, he's...I can't even describe.."

" Don't second guess yourself. Bella, if he treats you right and he makes you happy, that's all I want. That's all I'm worried about."

" You don't have to worry, Mom. I promise."

She leaned forward and wrapped her arms around me. " I'll always worry. I love you."

" I know, and I love you, too...But, I'm sure about Edward."

Hesitantly, she smiled at me and nodded, understanding that I meant what I said.

Because I did.

**Authors Note- Hope you loved the chapter! Two things to say now!**

**First, I have been slacking on posting Links. I am so sorry! But I have them up now for chapters or whatnot I've missed so if you want to see them, then go to my profile and check them out. I've been kind of busy with the Holiday craziness, but I've had a lot of free time recently so I am stepping back up again.**

**And now, I really want to thank all of you guys for making 2011 so great. I've been so grateful, and even blessed, to have so many great reviewers and so many sticking with me through my crazy stories. It's hard to believe that it's going to be 2012, but it's going to be a good one. This year, for me especially, has been pretty insane and I'm sure some of you can relate. I love all of you guys so much, truly; even though that might sound weird. I just can't express how thankful and so grateful I am to have all of you. You guys have supported me and been respectful when I told you an update might be late, and a lot of you sending your condolences when I lost people in my lives this year. So THANK YOU for EVERYTHING. Without you all I wouldn't be writing.**

**Okay, end of sappy-ness!**

**I hope all of you have a fantastic New Year, had a great 2011 and have an even better 2012!**

**REVIEWS get TEASERS. It's that simple!**


	23. Kids In Love

**Authors Note-This chapter is shorter, it's filler, but very important to the story as you will all see. Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer- S. Meyer owns all things Twilight.**

**Chapter Song: Kids in Love by: Mayday Parade**

~\\~

BPOV

~\\~

I had no idea how time seemed to just pass after we left Florida. It was like the clock was moving by hours instead of minutes. Since I'd gotten home, I hadn't spoken one word to my father. His words were still fresh to me, and I honestly didn't want to talk to him either. I wasn't going to pretend anymore. Things with him at this point were done and over with; and I was done with all the bullshit that he threw at me.

When we'd gotten back home it wasn't long before I found myself graduating in a fucking small class, in August, at Forks High School

Edward was there for me, hell; even Esme, Emmett and Alice were there for me. My own father couldn't be there, but Sue, Leah, and the boys were also there, as well as Jess, James and Angela and Ben. Knowing that all of them were there was enough, and I was so happy that they were there for me. It made me feel important and like I mattered to them.

But I knew that just days after graduation, Edward would be leaving. It was coming up behind me and I didn't want our time together to end. I knew I shouldn't have asked for more, we had an amazing summer together; I was lucky.

We'd both put off this reality for as long as we could though.

And that's how I found myself in his bedroom, the night before he is supposed to leave for the airport. His things are packed up, not all of it, but most and I found myself fighting tears and being just barely able to hold myself together. Most of his music was packed up, all of his notebooks, pictures and a few books. It was his bedroom, but all of the things that made it his were basically gone.

He was tense beside me, and I could tell by the look in his eyes felt the same way I did right now.

I should've prepared myself. We had the spring and summer together, one that I wouldn't have ever given up for anything in the world for it. How could someone give away the moments that they shared with the person they loved most? I knew I didn't have to give it away, it was something I would have to cling to while he was gone.

" We're going to be okay." he said quietly.

" I'm scared."

" Why, Angel?"

" What happens when my dad freaks out at me, and I have nobody to hold me and tell me it's going to be okay? Or on Friday nights when everybody is out and I don't have you with me. And when I call you and you don't answer and you're really in class but I think you're lying in a fucking ditch somewhere dead. What about when I just want to see you and kiss you, but I can't just drive over because you're going to be halfway across the country? What if-"

He gripped both of my hands, " Don't do that. Don't do that to yourself, or to me. Fuck, this is already so hard, and all I can think about is what you are thinking about. We have to try, okay? We have to try if we want this to work because I don't want to sit here and tell you that we have to break up because of this. It's only a few months, it's not forever. We aren't going to be that couple that does that, I don't want to be like that. I want you, Bella and I can't do that to us. You're everything to me. Everything."

My entire body froze, and slowly I looked up to meet his wide, green eyes.

" I want you, too."

" Then please stop running scenario's through your mind."

I wrapped my arms tightly around him and he pulled me up to the middle of the bed, lying so that our heads were level. I felt a single warm tear trail down my face.

" Don't cry, Bella." he murmured

I leaned forward and pushed my lips against his, finding comfort in his body close to mine. Edward returned the kiss intensely, threading his fingers through my hair and his other hand holding my hip tightly. It was as if it were the last time we'd ever kiss each other, or hold each other. It was desperate and full of longing

He pushed me onto my back and laid his body over mine completely. I moaned against his lips and he trailed hot kisses down my neck and collarbone. I moved my body up against his, feeling my body react to everything that he was doing to me. I raked my nails down his back and he let out a quiet groan into my mouth, tightening his hand in my hair.

His tongue flicked my lip ring and I let out another small moan and slanted my mouth over his, our tongues dancing together. I could feel him grind his lower half against me and I threw my head back as I felt the pleasure electrify my entire body. His hands went to the hem of my shirt and he pulled it off and took off his own shirt. My hands ran over the planes of his chest and I stared up into his dark, lusty eyes.

God, I loved it when he looked at me like that.

" Please, make me forget. Even if it's just for a little while. I need you Edward, now."

" What?"

I thought that the words would come out awkward, but oddly, they didn't. I looked at him, my face clear in what I meant, and I ran my hand over his jaw.

" I want you to make love to me, Edward."

His eyes widened and he looked down at me. " Are you sure?"

I took one of his hands in mine and rested it over my wildly beating heart.

" I'm yours already. I want to have something to remind me how real this is."

" That doesn't mean that you should feel like-"

" No. I want you, Edward. Please." I almost begged/

The second the last word left my mouth, his lips were on mine. They moved more slow and languid, pouring every emotion out. He cradled my face in his hands and pulled me to straddle his lap, showing me that I had the control. Once he pulled his lips from mine, he buried his face in my neck, his warm breath brushing over my skin.

" Okay."

~\\~

I guess I could have been one of those girls that said it was all butterflies and fucking rainbows, and it was perfect and whatnot; but it wasn't.

It was weird, awkward, and finding a rhythm was like trying to find fucking Waldo. And I always sucked at 'Where's Waldo?'. I guess comparing it to a kid's game was kind of odd, but that's how it was.

Even though it was weird, awkward, and pretty painful; Edward never failed to make me feel loved and cared for. It didn't matter that it wasn't like fireworks the first time to me. Edward seemed to have enjoyed himself fairly well and that was all that really mattered to me. I lay, curled up in his arms with a blanket wrapped firmly around me. I breathed in his scent deeply and rested my hand over his heart.

" Are you okay?"

" Yeah."

He turned his head to kiss my forehead, " I'm sorry I hurt you."

" You didn't do it on purpose. It would have happened with anybody."

" I'm happy that I was your first." he whispered quietly, his arms protectively wrapped around me.

" I know." I chuckled quietly. " Was it okay for you?"

" Incredible." he said lowly in my ear.

" Are you lying?"

" No. Not at all. I'd never lie to you."

I burrowed myself deeper into him, and I felt him reach over for something. He fumbled for something before settling back to where he was. My eyes fluttered closed and I sighed quietly, relaxing into him and enjoying the feeling of his bare body up against mine. I felt Edward pick up my left hand and slide something on my ring finger. I immediately popped open my eyes and looked at my hand.

" Don't freak out. It's only a promise ring."

Promise ring?

" Edward..." I breathed.

It was a simple ring, but beautiful in its own way. There was a silver band with diamonds encrusted all around it, between diamonds and rubies. The contrast of the red and the diamonds was beautiful, and I smiled at him.

" I want to promise you that we're going to make it, and in January, you and I are going to be together again; forever. Nothing will ever separate us. And I promise to love you every day for the rest of my life."

It fit perfectly on my finger, and it matched my bracelet he got me.

" I love you, too."

He ran his finger down over my jaw and looked back down at my hand.

" Is this okay?"

" Yes, it's perfect."

I reached my hand up to press against his cheek and kissed him slowly.

He wrapped his arms around me and pulled my body down on top of his. I trailed my lips down his jaw and neck, stopping just over his heart. Edward kissed the top of my head and kissed each of my fingers, and the promise ring.

" I don't want to go to sleep."

" Neither do I."

" We have to get up early."

Edward sighed and buried his face in my neck. " I know."

My head moved to rest on the pillow as Edward rested his face in my neck with his arms wrapped around my waist. As I started to doze off, I felt tears drip down onto my neck. I opened my eyes tiredly and looked down at him.

" Edwa-"

" Shhh. Sleep."

His voice was uneven, and I felt more tears fall from his eyes. I brushed my fingers through his hair and closed my eyes, giving into the pull of sleep.

~\\~

When we got up in the morning, Edward was quiet. He didn't say a word about anything.

I wasn't going to say anything about the crying. Guys didn't like talking about that shit, and I wasn't going to bother with that. He was up before me, showering and packing up the rest of his things. I awoke just as he put the picture I'd given him for his birthday in the grey bag.

He set my clothes from last night at the end of the bed and I wrapped the sheet around me and got up. I put those clothes in my bag and changed into fresh underwear and clothes. I slipped into a pair of straight leg, dark wash jeans, and a long sleeve all black lace top with a black tank top underneath. I fixed my hair and brushed my teeth, and did my makeup. I was in a little pain from last night, so I took a few Tylenol's that I kept in my purse.

Edward's flight was at eleven, and he had to get there by at least ten thirty, so we would have to leave at nine thirty to drive to Port Angeles. Alice, Esme and Carlisle were going, but Emmett wasn't going to. Then they were going to drop me off at home.

Just as I had finished in the bathroom, Edward had already made his bed and everything. I glanced around and saw him sitting on his lounger, staring out the window. I walked over to him and sat down next to him.

" Are you okay?" I asked.

He turned towards me and nodded, " Yeah...How are you? How are you feeling?"

" Okay."

" You're a terrible liar. I saw you swallow those pills."

" I'm fine. Don't worry about it."

He pulled me into his lap and kissed me chastely. " Okay."

" Are you nervous?"

" A little bit."

" You don't have to be. You're going to be amazing; I promise."

I sat in his lap for awhile longer before we had to go downstairs. We waited the last possible second and then walked down. Everybody was quiet it seemed. Esme looked pretty somber, but she was putting a smile on.

Edward packed his bags in the car, and the rest of his things had been shipped yesterday to his dorm.

Minutes later we had to shuffle into Carlisle's Mercedes. Edward passed look towards the house and his car before getting in next to me. I was in the middle between him and Alice. Esme got into her seat with a bottle of water and Carlisle started up the car.

I held back tears as we got on the road towards the airport, and Edward held me against his side tightly, staring out the window. I rested my hand on his leg, moving it up and down in a comforting manner. He turned his head to press his forehead to mine.

The entire way to the airport we held each other tightly, not wanting to let go, and then it was time for him to go inside the airport. Alice clung tightly onto him as did Esme, when Alice got a little upset, that's when my tears welled up.

" Don't get drunk or do anything bad."

" I won't."

" You call if you ever need anything. I'll be on the next flight out." Esme said.

" Don't worry."

Carlisle took out Edward's two bags and patted Edward on the shoulder. He lifted both bags onto his shoulder and one in his hand and reached his hand out for me.

" Can you guys wait here for Bella. I want her to come with me. It should only be ten minutes."

I desperately wished he meant it in the way I wanted, but he didn't.

" Of course."

We went inside the small airport with our hands linked, and Edward went through all of the security shit before sitting down in one of those plastic chairs to wait for his flight to be called. We were right by his terminal waiting for it to be called. I wished that we had more time together.

Edward pulled me into his lap and buried his face in my neck, breathing deeply.

Tears fell from my eyes when I leaned back to look at him. I could see his eyes a little bit watery, too.

" I'll see you Thanksgiving. I promise." he whispered, touching the side of my face gently.

What I didn't know, is that in my future; I actually wouldn't be seeing Edward that next Thanksgiving.

" And I'll try to call you every night."

I didn't know that eventually, we would barely talk on the phone at all, until all calls stopped and then we wouldn't communicate for days...weeks at a time even.

" Focus on your studies." I replied, " Just don't forget about me."

" I'd never forget about you."

" FLIGHT 938 IS BOARDING FROM PORT ANGELES TO NEW YORK, NEW YORK. I REPEAT; FLIGHT 938 FROM PORT ANGELES TO NEW YORK, NEW YORK."

Edward stood up and held both of my hands firmly is his before leaning down to kiss me. It was slow, and soft and loving in a way that made my entire body tingle.

It would be the last kiss for a long while.

" Stay safe for me."

" I will. Call me when you land."

" I will."

He kissed me again as they announced his flight once more. I could feel our tears mingling together and he ran his fingers through my hair softly before pulling back and wiping tears that fell from my eyes. Edward grabbed his small carry-on bag and forced a smile.

" I'll see you soon. And I'll talk to you even sooner."

I nodded and he kissed my forehead before turning around and walking away. My hand fell from his and I looked down, more tears dripping from my eyes.

" I love you." I whispered.

He couldn't hear me. I looked up and saw him handing his ticket and passport to a lady. I saw his glance back at me for just a moment before he waved and kept walking. As quickly as I could, I got the hell out of there. I pushed past people, wiping my tears.

I felt like I was going to be sick, and the heart wrenching pain in my chest left me feeling crippled. When I got outside, I saw Esme waiting outside the car. As I walked towards the car, I felt her envelope me in her arms and hold me tightly.

" Don't cry, sweetheart. He wouldn't want you to be sad. You'll be with him soon."

She rubbed my back soothingly before opening the car door for me to slip in. Alice gave me an apologetic look before rubbing my knee.

" It's going to be okay, Bella."

All of the words of hearing that it was going to be okay, and Edward telling me that we were going to make it; weren't true. I didn't know that when he'd gotten on that plane, or when we shared that goodbye.

When I look back on the positive point of it, this goodbye was going to be the last tearful goodbye I'd ever have to have with Edward face to face.

**Authors Note- IMPORTANT!**

**I really wanted to let a few of you guys know that I had three people last chapter who have Private Messaging disabled. I am not sure if the few of you that do have it, have it for a reason, but I do send out teasers, and I wasn't able to get them out to these people, so I just want to let you guys know that if you are disabled and you want the teasers, you are going to have to enable them; I really just don't want people to be missing out on the teaser and review replies if they want them; so just a quick note to you guys that if you are disabled for Private Messages, then I can't send you teasers for the next chapter!**

**So, does the ending leave you confused? I hope so!**

**REVIEW get TEASERS. It's that simple!**


	24. Your Star

**Authors Note- Alright guys, another chapter. I hope you all had a good week.**

**Disclaimer- S. Meyer owns all things Twilight.**

**Chapter Song- Your Star by: Evanescence**

**Warning- This chapter is going to be a little intense…**

~\\~

BPOV

~\\~

The first few days passed by in a blur. When I'd gotten home later on that day after dropping off Edward, I'd fallen into my bed and cried until I'd fallen asleep. I had gotten a call from Edward many hours later and most of it consisted of him telling me not to not cry. I could tell on the phone that I wasn't the only one struggling to keep it together. I couldn't help it. After that call, he said he'd call me soon; and I fell back into a hard sleep.

After that I threw myself into work. I had acquired more hours and I was working myself to the bone and coming home at the end of the day and crashing. Jasper wasn't working there anymore, and I had to pick up the slack. I enjoyed it, I guess. It kept my mind off of him. Edward and mine's conversations were short. But I blamed myself for that.

Talking to him was hard. I missed him so much. I longed to have him hold me in his arms. To have him kiss me, and relive the night before he left. I wanted all of it back, but I knew that I was the one tearing myself apart. It was hard not to.

That's when the nightmares started to come back full force.

For days I was walking around only surviving on three hours asleep. I'd been waking up screaming for almost a week straight. My father said nothing, Sue said nothing, but Leah was worried about me. James had tried to contact me, and he was sending me texts that I didn't exactly start responding to until later. I didn't want to deal with a messy situation if he was still feeling the way he was for me; especially without Edward around.

Most of his texts consisted of trying to reason with me.

_Answer the goddamn phone, Swan._

_Edward's been calling me telling me_

_that I need to check up on you._

_He's worried._

_Call me before I come over to your house._

_You can't do this to yourself, Bells._

_He'll be back soon, and you are_

_freaking him to hell out with_

_how you act on the phone._

_Call him and really talk to him._

_Or call me. I'm two second away from coming over._

~\\~

September 13th

~\\~

" Happy Birthday, Angel."

" It's nothing special. Hey, at least now I can go out and buy my own cigarette's."

" It is special. Did you get my gift that's in the mail?"

" Yeah, two days ago."

" Open it, silly girl."

With a sigh I grabbed the small box and sat down on my bed. I picked at the clear packing tape and peeled a piece off of it.

" I wish you were here with me to open it."

" I know. So do I. But we'll make the best of it. It's getting close to a month, not too much longer."

I opened up the box and saw two wrapped gifts inside. There were ribbons and bows attached to both of them, and it made me smile knowing that he put some effort into it to make it special for me.

" Open the bigger one first."

I grabbed it in my hands and when I picked it up, I was assaulted by his rich scent and stopped to breathe it in for just a moment. I ripped it open and saw one of his t-shirts, along with a Juilliard t-shirt.

" These aren't as sentimental, but my Chiodos t-shirt smells like me. James told me about your nightmares."

Traitor.

" And I hoped that maybe this would help you sleep at night. It's fucking weird, but you liked wearing my shirts so I figured..."

I picked it up and held it to my chest, breathing in his scent. " It's perfect."

He chuckled, " Good."

I smiled and stared at the phone. It had been the first time I smiled in awhile.

" I'll send you a new one each month. And I figured I'd get you a school t-shirt because you know, it's black and it had a fucking piano on it."

The shirt was fitted and v-neck, with a piano on the bottom side and down the other side it said Juilliard in grey letters. I smiled.

" I love it, it's great."

" Now open the other one."

I took off the silver wrapping paper and saw the Tiffany's box underneath.

" Edward, you need to stop getting me all this expensive jewelry."

" I like spoiling you. Open it."

I took off the lid and gasped at what was inside. My heart skipped a beat.

" It's a pendant in 18 karat white gold. Do you like it?"

It was in the shape of a heart, and at the top were it met it swirled down, and at the tip it crossed over. The diamonds sparkled, even in the dreary light that flooded through my bedroom window. It was beautiful, and much more than I ever would deserve.

" Edward..."

" Now I've got a ring on your finger, a bracelet on your wrist and a necklace around your neck. I'll work on earrings next."

" It's beautiful."

" You're beautiful."

" Apparently you haven't seen me these days. I look like I crawled out of a cave." I said with a low chuckle.

A long sigh sounded over the phone," Bella..."

" I know. Just forget about it. Thank you for the gifts. All of them. It means a lot to me that you did this."

" You're welcome, my Angel."

" I miss you."

" I miss you, too."

~\\~

" WHAT THE FUCK, EDWARD? Why did you send me that text?"

" Goddamnit, I was fucking drunk last night. I'm sorry."

" Oh, so you weren't ' chillin with hot girls and one reminds me of you' ? What the hell, Edward? You know how messed up that sounds. As if this isn't hard enough I get to hear this?"

" Can you calm the hell down. I didn't do anything with any girl. Brett got me back to our dorm, it was fine."

" So you would've done something if he wasn't there?"

" The girl's name is Katy, and she doesn't even look like you. I was drunk as all get out, Bella. I drank, that's it. I didn't sleep with anybody or kiss anybody. Hell, nobody even touched me for fucks sake."

I sighed, running a hand through my hair, " I can't deal with this."

" What do you mean you can't deal with this? Nothing happened, Bella. Nothing. You know I would never cheat on you, even if I was drunk. Hell, if I was drugged."

" I hate this." I whispered.

" Tell me you believe me."

" I'll call you later, okay?"

" Bella, don't do this."

" I didn't do anything, Edward. I need to think. I'll call you later."

~\\~

" I'm sorry. I know that I should believe you. It's hard, you know? With you so far away...It messes with my head and I'm acting like an insecure bitch, that isn't me. Maybe the bitch part is, but not insecure. I trust you, and I shouldn't doubt you. I just hope you understand why I acted that way. You were drunk and the text scared me. It's a different story if you're ten minutes away at a party, it's another when your over a thousand miles away from me. I miss you, and I guess that makes me go a little bit crazy."

" I'm not upset at you, Bella. You have a valid reason to be upset, and I swear to fucking god I won't do that shit again to you. But this is hard for me to, and when shit gets hard...I find ways to cope and that was one way I used to turn to. I know I have to find a different way. Being twenty eight thousand miles away from you is hard for me, too. And missing you makes me crazy, too."

" This is harder than I thought it would be."

" I know, but we'll be okay."

" Bella, I lo-"

" Edward, man! Kat is throwing a dorm party! You in, they've got beer, man?"

I heard him sigh over the phone, " I'm on the goddamn phone, can you not see that? I'm not going to a fucking party; I told you this morning that I was done with that shit."

" Whoa, okay, dude. Chill. And you're always on the phone with that girlfriend of yours. Talk about fucking clingy man."

Fucking tool.

" Fuck off." Edward spat at him.

I heard a door slam and Edward shifting with the phone.

" I'm sorry about that."

" It's fine. Look, if you want to go; then go. It's alright."

" No, it's not. I want to talk to you. What are you doing?"

I ran my hand over my comforter, " Laying in bed. You?"

" Mm, laying in bed. What are you wearing?"

" We're not doing that, Edward." I warned.

He chuckled, " That's not a proper answer, what are you wearing?"

I looked down at my sweatpants and t-shirt. It definitely was not something to keep him going if that's what he wanted.

" Shorts and a tank top."

" I miss touching you. You know what I miss most?"

" Hm?"

" Kissing your beautiful neck."

Okay, maybe this wasn't so awful...

My mind drifted back, remembering the day we made out on his Birthday, so many countless times in my bed when everybody was gone, our first kiss, our first time touching each other on the night of Prom, my first time with him. I let it wander, the blissful thoughts easing the ache in my chest and it felt good not to feel that gaping hole.

" I miss that, too. I wish I could feel your lips on-"

" Hey, Bella! There you are! My mom went out, can you-" Leah interrupted, bursting into my bedroom unbeknownst to her that I was one the phone.

" LEAH!" I shouted, shooting up and covering my forehead with my hand.

My entire body was flushed even from the short conversation with Edward, and Leah looked at me and then the phone. I was slightly annoyed that she was just standing there, but finally she snapped out of her weird stare and looked at me.

" Oh, sorry to interrupt...I was never here."

She shut the door behind her and I lay back on my bed and sighed, wanting to pull my hair out in pure frustration. I settled for tugging at the hem of my t-shirt that I wore.

" This isn't working." Edward said dryly.

" I'm sorry."

" The moment I see you again...We're never leaving my bed."

I laughed, " You promise?"

" God, I miss your laugh. And, yes, I promise."

Quietly I heard him hum the song he played for me on the piano. It was my song.

" You know, I played that in one of the empty practice rooms the other day. The teacher came in and said it was absolutely beautiful. He knew it was for someone special. I told him about you."

" You talk to people about me."

" Are you kidding? You're all I talk about. I think people get fucking tired of hearing it."

" You're amazing."

" And so are you, love."

It was the first time he'd ever used that little nickname, and I felt my heart squeeze at the sentiment. Was he trying to tell me he loved me? I sighed and looked over at the clock. It was getting late, and I had work tomorrow.

" I don't want to leave but I have work."

" Don't leave me." he teasingly begged.

" How could I possibly leave you? I sent you my goddamn pillow and sprayed it with my body spray just so that you could be somewhat closer to me. Cuddle with that and think of me."

" I might do more than just cuddle with it."

" You're so sick, Edward."

He laughed, " I'm just kidding. But it's still not the same. I like feeling your arms around me. And hearing you say my name when you sleep."

" And I miss your random groping as you sleep."

" Mm, I hope so...Hey, you know something? Halloween is on a Wednesday, and we get Thursday off after that, and I only have one class on Friday. Fuck, why didn't I think of this before? You can fly out here and stay with me for a few days!"

My eyes widened, " Are you serious?"

" Fuck yeah."

I sighed, " Edward, I mean, I have the money, but fuck, babe...I don't think I can spend it on a plane ticket."

" I'll take care of it. Please. Don't argue this one with me. I'll see you in October, November for Thanksgiving, and I have Christmas Break from the thirteenth and resume on the tenth. So we're already going to be flying there together basically."

" Probably not...I mean, yeah, both of us are going to be in New York, but Columbia is fucking four hours away from Juilliard."

" Let's not worry about that, alright? We can meet up half way if we need to...It's going to work out. But let's forget about that. You are coming to see me on Halloween!"

" Okay, okay."

" Aren't you excited?"

" Yeah, I am. We'll see each other in over a month, of course I am. I just feel awful that you are paying for my ticket." I said honestly, a smile still gracing my face at the thought of seeing him.

" Trust me, this is a gift for myself, too."

I laughed and rolled my eyes. But I was just as excited as he was on the inside. Maybe things were going to be okay.

~\\~

" Fuck, I hate hearing you cry. Please don't cry."

" How did I not get in? They don't think I qualify? I've worked my ass off, Edward. I've worked so hard and I didn't even get in. This was my dream. FUCK! I wanted one thing, one thing and I can't even get it. What the hell is wrong with me?"

" Bella, they are fucking stupid not to accept you. You've worked so hard, and don't let that get you down. There are so many other schools, love. And they'd be just as crazy not to accept you. What other letters did you get?"

" I got accepted to NYU. Surprising since I couldn't even get to Columbia. I graduated early; I got straight A's almost every year…"

" Sweetheart, you told me NYU was a back up because they have a great English program. It'll be okay."

" I don't want a fucking back-up, Edward!...Damnit, I'm sorry...I've just worked so hard and to not get it...I feel like tf I can't get in then...I just can't believe this. It was my dream to go to Columbia since I was a little girl, and now that was taken away from me also. Just like everything and everybody else."

He sighed, " Can I at least tell you one small bright side of NYU?"

" What?"

" You're less than fifteen minutes away from me."

I wiped my tears. " I just wanted it so bad, Edward. I wanted it like you wanted Juilliard."

" I know, and I hate that your dreams aren't coming true. But, hey, maybe NYU will be just as good. Of course Columbia is known for their English program, but NYU is good, too, Bella. It could maybe be even better, or just like you imagined Columbia would be. Give it a shot."

" I'll try."

~\\~

" Can you pry your fingers away from that phone for one night?"

" Is this even a good idea for me to stay over?"

He sighed, " Can you just forget about it already."

" I can't forget it when you kissed me."

" Bella, please ju-"

" It's alright. Never happened. Now please hand me a blunt."

James chuckled and passed one over, and that was all I remembered from the night. I forgot about how much I missed Edward, and how I wanted to feel him against me. I forgot about the big hole that was ripped into my chest when I couldn't talk to them. All thanks to a bottle of Vodka and some blunts.

My mind numbed, and it was like years ago when I first started drinking and getting high. Everything just disappeared and I could just exist in peace.

The next morning I awoke in James' bed all curled up in blankets. His room was cold. Since he lives in the basement it gets freezing once September hits. I shivered and looked over at him, seeing that he was passed out on the other side of the mattress with his mouth open, fully clothed. I looked down and saw I was sleeping in my jeans, and Edward's hoodie I had put on the previous day.

I could feel my head pound and my body ache. With a groan I got out of bed and went to the bathroom. Luckily, I didn't look as bad as I felt. I combed my hair and went back to the room, taking a blanket from the bed and laying on the couch instead. I didn't want to lay with James. After everything it didn't feel right to do that.

As I started to drift off, my phone went off. I opened my eyes and saw it was on the coffee table next to a bottle of raspberry Smirnoff that I had completely drained last night.

" Hello." I said, my voice rough and gravelly.

" I've been trying to get a hold of you since last night. Where were you?"

" Slept over at James."

" What? You slept over there?"

I winced at his loud tone of voice, pressing my fingers against my temple.

" Stop yelling, my head fucking hurts."

He laughed humorlessly, " And you got drunk?"

" Atleast I didn't get drunk and text you what you texted me. I was with James, Edward. Nothing happened."

He growled, " Oh, so he didn't kiss you? Where'd you sleep, Bella? Next to him in his bed?"

" Shut up, Edward. He was my friend before you were my boyfriend. And yes, if you must know, we did sleep in his bed, away from each other, not touching. And we didn't kiss. I probably sat there getting drunk all night complaining about how much I missed you."

" You did!" James yelled from the bed.

" That doesn't matter."

" Yes, it does. You were the one telling him to keep an eye out on me. Well, I decided to hang out with him tonight. So get over it."

" Whatever. Call me later." Edward said before hanging up.

~\\~

" I'm sorry. I can't make it out to New York for Halloween. Everybody is taking vacations apparently, and I didn't request off quick enough so I'm stuck working there on Halloween. There's no way I can get out there unless I just up and quit."

" What?"

The sound of heartbreak in the phone absolutely cracked me in half. I felt the tears fall down my face. I didn't bother wiping them.

" Bella, if this is because of the strain about that stupid fight about James, baby...Forget about it, okay? I know we haven't been talking much because of it; but it doesn't matter. I need to see you...Bella, I feel like I'm losing you. I need to see you so I know that we're going to be alright."

" We're alright, Edward."

It was a lie though. We both knew it.

We weren't alright.

~\\~

Most nights I found myself crying as I tried to fall asleep.

I was still working hard, and by the time October even stumbled around; I was a mess. I spent Halloween stuck in my bedroom after a hard day at work, trying to hold myself together and trying not to fall apart.

I didn't talk to Edward all the days that I was supposed to be spending with him. When I tried calling, all I got was voicemail. I even called Alice once to see if she'd talked to him. She didn't tell me much and I didn't bother with her for long.

Things with my father had gotten very quiet, and it's been weeks since we've even spoken a word to each other, the same went for Sue besides a one syllable word every few days. Leah gave me my space most of the time, too.

As for my mother, we still e-mail; but she knows my hesitance. She's wanted me to come back and see her, but I knew that I couldn't. The last time we really talked for real was on my Birthday. She was going to be putting all the money she's saved up for me, and money from my deceased grandparents, into my savings account.

I'd gotten the money from my grandparents when I turned eighteen, and together, all of it was thirteen thousand dollars. The money my mom had saved up for me, apparently Phil had also been adding to. And I had no fucking clue. She told me she had the fund since I was little, and when her and Charlie divorced he made her transfer the money into an account that belonged to her.

All of that added up to seventeen thousand five hundred even. As a total, from things I've saved up for myself, I had six thousand, one hundred and twenty dollars. I couldn't believe I had that much in my savings, and checking's. Considering I basically buy my own food, my clothes, shower things, gas and car bill; I felt pretty proud to have that much.

Onto the subject of my friends, Angela and Jess were trying to keep my spirits up. I'd admit that it was a hard feat these days. I was glad that they were trying though. It was more than I deserved from anybody. I just couldn't seem to get back up again.

I needed the purpose for living back. I needed the love of my life back.

~\\~

I didn't know how much longer that I could take even one more second of it.

The fighting.

The arguments about stupid shit.

Or the pain that constantly pulled at my heart.

Since I wasn't able to make it back from Halloween, things with Edward weren't going well at all.

I'd say both of us contributed to the downfall that I never expected.

All of the promises of making it work were broken. He seemed to have given up, and I guess I threw in the towel at one point. We were tearing each other apart piece by piece.

Our calls were less frequent, and barely lasted. Edward was always quiet and not saying much. Our conversations were almost awkward, filled with a silence that both of us were really uncomfortable with; but there wasn't anything we could do about it.

It felt like the damage was done.

And I felt defeated.

Because I'd thought we were strong enough to handle this.

~\\~

" I think maybe we should take a break." He said, voice devoid of any emotion.

My eyes burned with tears.

" What?"

" I can't do this anymore, Bella."

" And you think I can handle it?" I asked defensively.

" I never said that."

" Edward, if you want to break up, please tell me...I can't walk around being on a break only to find out that it's over. Please." I begged, pressing my hand against my chest.

He sighed, " I don't know. I just...I'll be home in a week and a half for Thanksgiving, and right now I need to think. You know how much you mean to me, but we're breaking each other apart. I can't do it."

" Okay."

" Okay?"

" What do you want me to say? I thought we would be able to handle this, but I guess maybe we just aren't cut out for long distance. People who care about each other don't break the other apart."

" I know, which is why I think we should take a step back... But, look, I've got to go."

" Edward?" I asked quietly as tears rolled down my cheeks.

" Yes?"

" Don't...Don't forget about me." I whispered.

His voice caught, " I-I won't."

He hung up and I heard the receiver. With a choking sob I clutched my phone and sunk down onto my bed, slowly feeling my entire self break apart.

I thought we could have made it.

But all we did was tear everything up and make a huge mess in the process.

I didn't know what to feel besides the crushing feeling in my heart. I stared down at the promise ring he gave me and my heart clenched.

Edward was my everything. He was the reason I was able to survive these days; knowing that even though he was so far he still cared. And now my reason for surviving was basically halfway out the door on our relationship.

~\\~

" You're going to kill yourself, Bella. You can't drink like this. God, if he saw me letting you drink like this I'd be dead."

I rolled my eyes, taking a long drink from the bottle of tequila as James reached over and took it. I slumped back into the couch and felt the tears well up. With a deep breath, I grabbed the fleece blanket from the couch and wrapped it around me, but it was tangled and weird.

James stepped up to me and spread the blanket out, handing me a pillow from his bed. With that he sat on the floor, next to the couch and near me. I turned my head and looked over at him, hoping maybe he had all the answers.

" Why can't I forget it? I've drank myself into pure stupidity and I still hear him in my head telling me that we need to take a break. I just wanted to be with him, is that wanting too much...God, I can't get into the college I wanted; and I worked my ass off for so many years...Now my boyfriend wants to be on a break, my father fucking hates me...Please tell me what the fuck I did, James? Please?"

He sat at the end of the couch and took me in his arms, rubbing my arm gently.

" Edward loves you, Bella. That's why he did it, because he wants to be with you and he doesn't want to continue on the path you were on being together."

" Did he say that to you?"

" In a certain way."

I sighed and leaned into him, closing my eyes, " Thanks for being here, I appreciate it. I love you, dude."

" You're so drunk. Get some sleep and I'll drive you home in the morning, drunky. I still can't believe you walked here after drinking three of your dad's beers."

I groaned, " He is so going to kill me. Not that he doesn't already want me dead."

" Shh, sleep."

" But-"

" Shut up, Bella."

~\\~

In the morning I awoke with my head pounding. My stomach was in knots and my mouth was dry as hell. With a groan I groped around for something to drink, my hand found a familiar neck of a bottle, my lips wrapped around it, taking a long pull.

Loud steps pounded down the stairs, making me wince, but I kept drinking anyways. When they stopped, I heard a loud swear word before the bottle was ripped from my lips. I glared up at James and he went to the bathroom, dumping the bottle out before returning with a glass of water. I took it from him, ignoring the pills he handed me and laid back.

" Bella, you need to stop with this."

" I was thirsty."

" Mhm. I'm driving you home, let's go."

I let out a whiny groan that I couldn't even believe came from me. He rolled his eyes and heaved me off of the couch, my dead weight heavy against him.

" Help me out here, Bells."

" I'm tired."

Somehow he got me in his car and he drove the two minutes to my house. It was cold as hell outside, and I was wearing a pair of sleep shorts and a t-shirt that belonged to Edward and a hoodie with a broken zipper with a pair of five inch black platform heels.

It was no wonder James thought I was a hot mess. My hair was a curled disaster, and my eye makeup was a mess of black eye shadow and a smear of chapstick on my lips and smudged outside my lips. I stumbled up to the house, looking at my phone as I did and unlocked the door.

I wish I took in consideration of the time, because my dad was in the foyer getting ready to leave for work. When he saw me, his eyes widened and his angry stare immediately went up. I rolled my eyes and walked past him, just as I did his hand wrapped around my arm to stop me.

" What in the hell do you think you are doing stumbling in this house after being out all night?"

I laughed, " Going to bed if you don't mind."

" That's all you fucking do around here; sleep, work or come home smelling like a goddamn brewery."

" Thanks, _dad_, it's great to know how much you care about me. You always know what to say."

" My god you reek of tequila."

" Fuck yeah I do." I agree with a snarky smile.

He scoffed in disgust, " Look at the example you are setting for the kids. How much more fucked up can you get? Huh?"

" I don't give a _fuck _about setting a goddamn example for your step-children. They should know by now I'm nobody to look up to."

I stumbled my way up the stairs before slamming my bedroom door behind me hard. I locked it and threw my phone off the bed, stripping down out of all of my clothes, which reeked of weed, cigarettes and as my dad said; tequila.

I turned the shower on and waited for it to heat up. When it was warm enough, I sunk to the ground, leaning against the tile with my makeup streaked down my face as I cried quietly.

I knew at that point that nothing could get any worse.

**Authors Note- Don't shoot me.**

**Maybe it's a little more than just a little intense; but poor Bella here is taking things pretty hard.**

**REVIEWS get TEASERS so hop to it! I'd absolutely adore hearing everybody's thoughts on this chapter so make them long ones!**


	25. The Story of Us

**Authors Note- This chapter is a long, crazy mess. So enjoy it. READ NOTE BELOW.**

**Authors Note 2- Hey, guys! So sorry the chapter didn't go up. I'm not sure what the issue was, but I'm sorry!**

**Disclaimer- S. Meyer owns all things Twilight.**

**Chapter Song: The Story of Us by: Taylor Swift.**

~\\~

November 2nd

~\\~

" Fuck no, Bella. I don't give a shit about you getting high and drunk, but there is no goddamn way you are going near Coke."

" Okay, Charlie," I sneered, taking another long drink from the bottle of Vodka.

I knew after awhile he'd take it from me and say it was enough, and then he'd tell me to go to sleep and I would. That's how it's been for days now. On Halloween I drowned myself in it while I heard James on the phone in his bathroom taking to Edward.

The thought of his name made me drink more.

" Why does he talk to you and not me?"

" Because you're on a break."

" Are you telling him how fucked up I am?" I asked with a devilish smile.

He let out a chuckle, " Yeah, actually. He's worried about you."

" Then why doesn't he stop being such a goddamn asshole and call me."

" Ask me that when you are sober. Wait, when you are sober you actually understand shit. Never mind."

I glared at him and set the bottle down, lighting up a cigarette.

" What're you wearing?"

" A top, bottom and shoes?"

" I'm not stupid."

I snapped, " I'm wearing a fucking t-shirt that belongs to my ex or whatever the hell he is boyfriend, and a button up shirt of his that I took. That what you want to hear? Or do you want me to describe my jeans and shoes, too?"

" Calm down, Bella."

" No, I'm not going to fucking calm down."

I inhaled more smoke and breathed it out, immediately feeling relaxed and at ease.

" Bed time."

" Maybe for you, not me." I said."

He rolled his eyes, " Dream on, Princess."

A few hours later, more sips of Vodka and a blunt, I was basically alone because James was passed out on his bed. My hand grabbed for my phone and I went to the bathroom, closing the door behind me and leaning against the wall.

My hands and legs were shaking, my heart was racing and it felt like someone was squeezing my lungs. I dialed the familiar number, not caring about the time and hit the green call button. It rang, and rang, and rang three times in a row before a groggy voice picked it up.

It was familiar. A part inside of me sobered up and felt warm, complete almost. I closed my eyes and felt a tear stream down my cheek.

" Bella?" he asked softly.

" I miss you." I whimpered pathetically.

" I know. I miss you, too."

I picked up the bottle of Smirnoff that was glued to my hand and took another deep pull, a long sigh of relief pouring out of my mouth as the familiar burn graced my throat.

" Baby, I'm so fucked up right now." I giggled, leaning against the wall.

The longing sound in his voice was immediately gone, " Stop with all the drinking and smoking."

" It helps numb everything though. I don't hear you talking to me in my head anymore." I slurred.

" I wanted things to get better when I told you we should take a break." he sounded almost angry.

My defensive side flared, " Sorry to wreck your plans, Edward. But, hey, I hope you're having fun in New York. Meet some new girls? Are they willing to fall into bed with you quicker than I was?"

Almost immediately I regretted the words that slipped out of my mouth. I was drunk, but I knew that was wrong and I didn't mean it at all. Over the phone there was dead silence, and I felt tears streak down my face.

"I didn't mean that. I'm sorry, I just...I'm a mess without you and god I'm so fucked up right now."

" It's fine."

" No, it's not. I just accused you of...of-"

" Bella, just go to sleep."

" No!"

I was tired of fighting. The angry tones. The armor that he put up between us.

The bathroom door opened and James stepped through, his eyes adjusting to the light. When he saw the bottle and my phone, he groaned and grabbed my phone from me, putting it to his ear.

" Isabella Swan is currently drunk off her ass, so don't take what she says seriously...Oh, fuck, Edward?...Dude, I swear I was sleeping...What did she say?...Don't get like that..."

" Give me my phone!" I screeched, bolting up.

" No way, Bella. You've already turned him into a moping mess."

" Give me the phone!"

" No."

" I love him, give me the phone. I miss him, please, James, I just want to tell him I love him. I never got to...I never got to tell him..." I gasped for breath, holding my stomach as I felt it lurch.

" I've got to go...No, Edward, I'm not giving her the phone when she is about to vomit. I pick up the pieces, remember? Later."

He shut my phone just as I leaned over to throw up. James grabbed for my hair, but it was too late. James sat back against the wall and ran his hands through his spiked hair, looking helpless.

" My god, what the fuck am I going to do with you and him?"

" Get out of here." I told him as I wiped my mouth.

James laughed, " You're funny."

" I'm taking a shower, do you want to see me naked? Nevermind, I don't even want to know. Get out."

He left the room, leaving it unlocked though. I sighed and striped out of my clothes before getting in the shower. The tears fell from my eyes as they always did, and I washed my body and scrubbed the vomit out of my hair vigorously

Glorious.

Once I was clean I got out and grabbed the towel under the sink. James had put out a pair of sweats for me to sleep in, and I put them on after drying off. I pulled on the tank top I had on underneath my previous shirt and toweled my hair before stepping out of the bathroom. Dark tendrils of hair stuck to my damp neck and upper bare back, to which I pulled away.

My phone was on his bedside table, and I went over and sat next to him at the edge of the bed. I rubbed my eyes and groaned when I saw the makeup on my hands. I really was a wreck, but the shower sobered me up a bit; even though the room was still spinning.

" I'm sorry."

" For?"

" Just because I'm fucked up doesn't mean I should bring you into it."

" You aren't fucked up."

I raised an eyebrow at him, " James, I'm messed up right now. And knowing that Edward and I are messed up makes it worse. He's in school enjoying it, and I'm here getting drunk."

" Bella, he was borderline hysterical when he called me that night you guys decided to take a break."

" No, James, _he _decided to take a break." I whispered, " And on the phone he just...sounded angry...or annoyed. It's like a contest of who can care less. He's winning."

Immediately he changed the subject, " That shower do you good?"

I nodded. It had.

Inside of me I knew that I really needed to stop drinking and getting high like how I was. In fact, I needed to stop it all together if I wanted to buck up and be strong. It's only been a few days since Edward and I went on a break; and doing this to myself wasn't going to help anyone.

Before Edward, I relied on myself. I was living, breathing and getting by in my own way because nobody really cared what I did and how I did things unless it concerned them. When he left I let my life shatter, and I'd completely forgotten about how months later it was only me I relied on, that I took care of myself and made sure that I was okay. I completely let that go when I met him; and there was a big part of myself that felt foolish because even though I knew I could rely on him, I stopped taking control of my life.

Nobody could define me. I was my own person.

Whatever happened to that? Fuck, months ago I'd be calling myself some colorful names if I knew this was the way I would be acting. This realization hit me like a ton of bricks, and I pulled at the ends of my hair and stared at the pattern on the ceiling panels.

James wrapped his arm around my shoulders and pulled me to his side.

" Thanks for taking care of me."

I needed to pick up the pieces of my life.

" Anytime, Swan. Now I'm fucking tired. Let's sleep."

In the morning I hauled my ass out of James' bed and headed home, still looking like a mess, and hung over as hell. When I got home, nobody was home besides Sue, who was looking at a Home and Garden magazine when I walked in. I went to the kitchen and grabbed a can of soda before walking upstairs to my bedroom, opening up the can and drowning the contents.

I dropped my bag on my messy bed and looked around my room. Clothes were strewn around, papers on the floor, shoes spewing from my closet and random things hanging around everywhere. I tossed my hair up in a high ponytail and tucked my grown out bangs behind my ear.

I spent the day cleaning up my room, which kept my mind busy. A big part of me really wanted to go to James for a drink, but I knew that I had to break that before it became a habit. I was not going to be an eighteen year old alcoholic. It was fucking fun as hell to drink, but I knew it would only ruin my chances of being with Edward again.

When the afternoon reached me, I found myself asleep in my bed for a long, leisurely nap.

~\\~

" ISABELLA!"

My body jerked and I got up quickly. My head hurt a little bit from the previous nightmare that haunted my brain. I shook myself from it and ran my fingers through my hair.

What the hell was going on?

" GET THE HELL DOWN HERE, ISABELLA!"

I opened my bedroom door and stumbled all the way down the stairs, seeing Charlie absolutely fuming as he stood in the kitchen holding some piece of paper printed onto a white sheet. I had no idea what the fuck it was, but I wasn't in the mood for any of this.

" What?" I asked.

" A seven hundred dollar phone bill? You're lucky I even pay the twenty bucks a month for you, and I get this?"

My eyes widened, " Seven hundred dollars? That's not right. They must have gotten it wrong."

" Of course, blaming everybody else before yourself."

I glared at him, " What the fuck does that mean?"

" Don't cuss at me."

" I'll do whatever I so damn please. It's not like you are my goddamn father anyways!" I shouted.

" You're lucky I don't throw you out on your ass."

" For doing what? Being a constant reminder of my mother! Get the fuck over it, you already re-married not even a year after your divorce." I sneered.

Rage passed through his eyes and I jerked the paper out of his hands and looked over it I looked for the number I knew had to be printed on it, wanting to see if it was actually the bill for my phone. I wouldn't ever use seven hundred dollars worth of anything on my phone; I barely text, and maybe talk on the phone for two hours tops maybe every few days. And that was when I was talking to Edward. It was absolutely impossible for it to be me.

My eyes caught the number printed on the sheet.

It wasn't my cell phone number at all.

It was Leah's.

" This is Leah's cell phone number. Next time you should check it before jumping down my goddamn throat about it."

I slammed the paper down on the table and started walking away.

" You think you have the right to walk away from me?" he shouted.

I turned around and suddenly saw Sue rushing past me with a frantic look on her face.

" Both of you need to stop this. Bella, please stop swearing and just go upstairs to your bedroom. Charlie, go out back, now." Sue said in a loud, firm voice.

" With pleasure. I don't want to even talk to you again, or see you for that matter." I spat at my father.

" How about you go stay the goddamn night with that sad excuse of a human being of a boyfriend you have. You can go do do what you've been doing for years, being easy. I'll see you stumble into MY house at five o'clock in the morning smelling like alcohol and god knows what else, later."

Sue gasped and I felt myself freeze.

Leah was standing near the basement door with her hand over her mouth, and I saw Seth and Jake on the stairs, and Seth looked like he wanted to cry for some reason. I'd never really seen them anything but annoyed when I fought with my father.

I turned around and felt the anger inside of me over boiling.

" You know the reason why I get high and I get drunk? It's all because of you. You've made me feel worthless, because that's how you felt when mom left. And you've made me feel like I don't matter, and that I am nothing. You know have no right to say anything about anybody in my life, and how dare you stand there and call me easy when you don't know one fucking thing about me. I'm done. I won't allow you to tear me apart. You can finally get what you want; a new family, with no trace of your old one."

I walked upstairs without anything else to say and felt the tears sting my eyes.

All over a stupid phone bill that wasn't even mine to begin with. I heard my bedroom door open and Leah walked through. Her eyes were wide and rimmed red.

" Bella, I am so sorry."

" It's not your fault." I told her as I grabbed a travel bag from under my bed.

" You're leaving? Oh my god, please don't go. I can't believe...It's all my fault!"

I turned towards her, " Nothing is anybody's fault, okay? It's over, it's done with. I can't be here anymore."

Leah wrapped her arms tightly around me in a hug and I returned it before turning back to my bag. Once she left the room I allowed myself to break down, uneven, broken sobs escaping my lips. My shaking hands frantically searched for my phone, and as my hands went to dial Edward's number; I stopped.

He wasn't mine anymore.

I couldn't call or text him.

He was in New York.

And right now he was contemplating if he even wanted to be with me.

I found it hard to stand up straight and focus. My hands shook even more as I dialed James' number. He could help me. He always helped me.

I put the phone to my ear and frantically grabbed my things, putting them in the bag without even really looking at what I was doing.

" Hey, what's going on? Edward called me on the phone an hour ago, he was borderline hysterical."

He was hysterical.

" M-My dad. I can't...I'm done here. I need somewhere to stay, just for a few days and then I'll figure it all out. But I can't stay here."

" Okay, don't cry. I'm coming over, alright. Five minutes."

My hands shook as I emptied my closet and drawers into the bag, fitting all that I could before stumbling to the bathroom.

I was losing everything.

And it was happening so fast I couldn't even breathe.

When I got downstairs James had just walked through the door. He's not been here often, but he knows my house and has come across my father maybe three times. As James was about to grab onto me, I felt my body being pressed up against the wall with two hands around my throat. I choked as my air supply was cut off.

My body struggled harshly, clawing at my father's hands with my nails. The skin broke underneath my hand and I let out a choking noise. It felt like forever as I struggled, kicking my legs until suddenly he was on his ass, shouting profanities loudly. James grabbed my hand and jerked me forward out of the house. I was coughing and trying to catch my breath as I stumbled into the cool air.. My throat burned and my heart pulsed painfully. I gripped onto James hard, trying to ground myself.

" Get her the fuck out of here! I don't want to look at her!" Charlie shouted.

The moment James got me into his car my head was spinning. I heard him calling my name but I passed out before anything registered.

~\\~

" He was choking her...No, dude, his hands were around her neck...Yeah, but she's got a hell of a bruise...I carried her to my room. She passed out...I don't know, she said she was going to figure it out but she isn't going back there…Maybe for her things but for nothing more than that."

" I will...Don't feel so fucking bad, okay?...I know that it makes it worse, but...Dude, you did what you had to do, okay? It's not fair for either of you guys to be miserable...Yeah...Sure thing, bye."

I shifted around for a moment before my eyes opened. I winced at the light and blinked a few times.

" Hey, how are you feeling?"

" You don't want that answer."

I faced the back of the couch and as I moved my head, wincing as I did. My neck was bruised; I could definitely feel it.

James sat on the coffee table and reached out for me.

" I called him. I know you probably don't want to know, but I thought he deserved to know what was going on with you."

He lifted me up by my waist and moved in to sit where I had been lying. He put his arms around me and my head fell slack against his shoulder; all of the tears and everything finally coming out.

Once and for all.

~\\~

BPOV

November 23rd

Friday

~\\~

" I'm okay, mom. Stop worrying about me."

" How can I not be worried? Bella, you-"

" Mom, I'm doing fine. Great actually. I've gotten an apartment for right now, and I'm applying to jobs in the area to make sure all the money doesn't go down the drain. I've barely gotten into my savings. Only for rent down payment and a cell phone and something to sleep on."

" I wish you would've come here."

" It'll be fine. I'll call you later, okay?"

I hung up my phone with a sigh and looked around the empty apartment.

In the past week and a half, my entire fucking life did a complete three fucking sixty.

I stayed with James until the fourteenth. Once the fourteenth hit I went back to the house when my father was working and packed up all my shit. Sue tried to stop me, Leah tried to stop me and hell, even the boys did but I had to get out. Eventually they gave up with arguing with me. They relented and Leah even helped me get my shit together..

That day I had a long talk with Leah about everything. I felt like I owed her something. She really was an amazing step-sister to me. Always made sure that I knew she cared, and that meant the world to me. By the end of the day, I was glad that there was more understanding between us; I didn't want anybody to think that I was leaving just because I could. I hoped that the house would be a happier place without me in it, and I fucking meant it. I felt bad that, especially, the boys had to hear the wars that went on; they didn't deserve that. After losing their dad, they deserved more than that.

James helped me pack all my things in boxes and bags and pack it into my truck. I had all my clothes and everything in my bedroom besides furniture in my truck, and on the fifteenth I was making my way towards New York in my truck. I was surprised it had made it all the way across the damn country. My car was definitely a trooper.

I picked a hell of a time. Luckily the back of the truck had a thick tarp secured over it, so nothing was fucked up by the intense cold weather or the light rain, and I got to New York after three long days of driving. At least fourteen hours a day driving until I reached my destination. It was fucking hell, but I knew that this was where I belonged right now. School started in January for me, and I figured I'd get a head start with getting familiar with the area.

The only person I've really been talking to is James. He wanted me to keep him posted to make sure I was alright; so far as he knew; I was. I was glad that there was someone missing me. Angela and Jess were completely stunned by everything I'd told them. It made my fucking head spin also, but it was a slightly tearful goodbye with them. I'd miss them, a lot, especially Jess; but things would work out and we'd still talk.

By the seventeenth I was scouting around for apartments, and I'd gotten so fucking lucky. I found a complex near NYU and downtown, and they had so many apartments available there. I was able to move in two days later after giving them an upfront rent for a month in advance, but they knew that in January I was going to be out.

It was no grand palace. It was more like a studio apartment, but not as expensive. Just a living room/bedroom, a kitchen and a bathroom, but it wasn't gross and dirty, it was alright here. The rent was only three hundred a month for what I got, and job hunting was still going on and I'd applied absolutely everywhere. For now, I had to live on my savings, which fucking sucked majorly.

Edward was on my mind, and I wondered if he knew where I was. He didn't have my number to call me anymore, because I had to get a new phone and number, but it felt too awkward to text him and tell him what my number was. I told James to give it to him if he wanted it for any reason.

On the nineteenth was when I got to the apartment and got all my shit there. The kitchen was small, but actually pretty modern. The entire floor was dark wood, and a white tile in the kitchen with a stainless steel fridge, dishwater, and luckily, a microwave and a stove. The counters were white, and the cabinets, both top and bottom were dark wood and a few with glass fronts.

The bathroom was like the size of my other one back in Forks, but with white everything basically, except the dark wood for the cabinets

I had to go shopping for shit. Instead of buying a bed, I ended up just getting a blow up mattress because in the beginning of the year I would have to fit things in a dorm. I bought things for the bathroom, and a few simple things for the kitchen, food of course, and I bought a small pan and pot, because fuck, I had to cook something at some point. I didn't stock up like crazy though, because I knew eventually I would have to pack all this up for a dorm room.

I hadn't heard nothing from Sue or Charlie, but I texted Leah with my number, along with Angela and Jessica. We talked on the phone maybe once a week, but Jessica called me almost every day. I really did miss her, she and Angela were my best friends, but Jess by far was always there for me no matter what.

With a deep sigh, I got up off my mattress, shoving my comforter off of it as I did.

Packing my entire bedroom up in a day back in Forks was a bitch, but at least the apartment didn't look too empty. I'd taken my flat screen from my bedroom, which was currently on the floor on channel 9 with Friends playing.

The apartment had my posters on the boring grey walls. I couldn't leave my poster collection behind. Fuck, I meant it when I took everything but the furniture. The room was stripped bare besides the furniture. They would have thrown my shit out anyways. I hoped that when my father looked at the room he'd feel some sort of guilt. I was still hiding a bruise with scarves right now. The first few days I was convinced my voice wouldn't get better, it was low and rough. It finally started getting back to normal when I got to New York.

I took my pot of ramen off the stove and poured it into a plastic bowl and grabbed a plastic disposable fork. I was all for the plastic these days. I could afford nicer things, but I was going to save my money and use it wisely. Once you are out on your own, you find small ways to cut corners.

With a sigh I sat back down on my makeshift bed.

It was weird being here all alone with nobody here. I wasn't freaking out about it though. In a way, it was nice. I could be alone to deal with everything I needed to. I needed a do-over. Back in Forks I had been so dependent on people. Well, more like Edward. When he was gone, my life crumbled and I had to learn to depend on myself like I always had. But being here in New York on my own was a good thing for me.

This was my chance to turn my life around.

~\\~

I hugged my coat around me tighter as the snow fell freely from the sky. When I walked into the shop I saw all of the Christmas decorations and smiled. Jenna grinned at me from behind the counter and tossed me something red. When I looked at it I saw that it was a Santa hat.

A big, obnoxious one with a big, fluffy white ball hanging from the tip of the hat.

" Do I really need to wear this?"

" You always look sad, thought this would brighten you up. Put it on."

I went to the back and took my coat and hat off, hanging it up in my locker. I put on my black apron over my long sleeved cream colored sweater, and then put on the Santa hat just for Jenna. She was wearing it, too, so I wouldn't look as foolish.

When I got to the front I went to my register and got started on my day.

I've been working at RBC NYC Coffee since the beginning of December, and so far, everything has been going pretty well for me. It's only five minutes away from NYU's main University building and maybe two minutes extra from the apartment. It's a really nice place, and I like it. The entire employee staff is really nice, and Jenna and I were quick friends. The manager was pretty cool, and all around it was a good environment to be around.

It's already the twentieth, and it's been a month since I've been here. Things were going good, and I was actually enjoying being here on my own without my father and living in that goddamn house. If it weren't for all the shit that's gone on with Edward; I'd probably feel even better.

But all of that was still staring me in the face.

Every time my phone went off, I wished it was him. I wished he was here with me, and now I was staring a lonely Christmas in the face. I didn't even want to stick around for New Years. I'd drown myself in sparkling grape juice and cigarettes.

It sounded promising to me.

I wanted nothing more than to spend Christmas with him and kiss him on New Years, but I know that it was silly to think like that. What we had was probably gone. I was just waiting around to hear the fucking words that it was official.

I knew that he was on break now and most likely back home in Forks to spend it with his family. He hadn't tried to contact me since I've been here, but then again, I haven't tried getting a hold of him; so I honestly couldn't be upset at him. Maybe he was right about us needing a break.

~\\~

After a long day at work, I found myself walking up the stairs to my apartment. When I got there, I saw a box on the ground right in front of the door. My brow furrowed in confusion, and I bent down to pick it up. James was the only one who knew my address, but this was from the Cullen's address.

My breathing hitched and I grabbed the small box and went inside. I shut and locked the door behind me, throwing my keys on the counter. I set the box down on the counter and stared at it for just a moment, wondering why anybody from the Cullen house would be sending me something. I grabbed a pair of scissors and started to slice through the tape that secured it.

I opened up the flaps and took out the bubble wrap. Inside of the box sat another box, in a familiar Tiffany blue color with a white bow tied perfectly. I lifted it up delicately, trying to fight the tears that sprung to my eyes; I knew I was being a fucking emotional mess, but that's how I felt when it came to this entire situation.

Nestled inside of the Tiffany's box, in soft fabric, were two heart shaped diamond stud earrings that were gorgeous. A tear dripped down my cheek and I wiped it immediately, and saw a note inside of the box. I grabbed it quickly and unfolded it with teary eyes and shaking hands.

_My beautiful Bella,_

_I know that I haven't talked to you since that night we talked on the phone and I told you that we should take a break from each other (if you don't count your drunk call); but even that won't stop me from missing you and spoiling you with gifts. I miss you. James gave me your address, I hope you aren't mad. I practically forced it out of him. I'm sorry I didn't try to contact you when you first got here. I wanted to very badly but I thought that we needed more time, and you were settling in. Maybe we both needed to stand on our own for awhile? I want to talk to you when I get back to New York, I'm with my mom in Forks for break, and I just hope you get this before Christmas. When I saw these I knew that I had to give them to you, Angel. I am thinking about you every moment of every single day, do not forget that._

_I hope to see you soon, love._

_Sincerely,_

_Edward_

He still wanted me.

I leaned back against the counter and sighed. I took the earrings from the box and put them in my ears. They were beautiful, and I loved them. A huge part of me felt awful for not getting him anything, but I didn't even think that this would even happen. I would make it up to him when he got back. I touched the diamonds gently, and it made me smile that he knew what exactly I'd love.

I just hoped to god that everything in the letter was true.

~\\~

It was New Years Eve

All Christmas I'd spent working, but had New Years day off. I found myself with three bottles of sparkling grape juice in the fridge, some poured into a cup, and a hot bath. It was soothing and nice. Everything was quiet and there was no stress.

On the fourth I was going to be able to start moving my things into my dorm, and luckily all of my school books were here and I was basically prepared for everything. My last month's rent was already paid, and I was just putting things together to get ready to leave.

When I'd gotten accepted to NYU, I had gotten a full academic scholarship, including room and board and I didn't have to pay for anything. This surprised me considering the fact that I didn't get into Columbia, but at this point, I said fuck it and NYU was just as good. I've only had to pay for books, and all the work I had done back home did pay off.

It hadn't been for nothing like I had thought.

Columbia was a fantastic school, but it didn't work out for a reason. I was just so fucking lucky to not have to pay for my school at all. I wouldn't ever understand why with a 4.2 GPA and graduating early I didn't get into Columbia, but I wasn't going to dwell on it any longer.

For awhile I soaked in the bath, and at around eleven I got out and wrapped myself in my robe and let my hair down from the high bun. My hair was at my fucking waist now, the longest I'd ever let it get, and now it fell in natural waves down my back. I brushed it out and went to the living room. It was another bowl of ramen for dinner tonight, and then I relaxed and laid down while I watched the count down with a cup of sparkling grape juice. My mother had called me this morning, and she was more okay with my New York; I think that after seeing that I was able to care for myself she started to accept it. She was happier that I was going to be at the University soon, the thought of me on my own in New York still did scared her.

After she heard about everything with Edward, she was even more worried, but we'd talked a lot about everything in general going on, and I told her about the earrings and the note. She thought it was the sweetest thing ever, of course she did; this was my mother. I knew she was worried about me being alone here, but I think she was starting to get that if I could handle myself in Forks with the way my father treated me, New York was nothing.

As the clock hit twelve here, I knew that it was only nine in Washington right now. The television flashed with people kissing and confetti flying everywhere, and I changed the channel. It was also on Channel 7, 5 and channel 2 was the News. I went to channel 32 and watched Family Guy. There was no way I was going to watch all those people kissing and be reminded that I didn't have that this year.

A moment later my phone went off and I answered it without even bothering to check who it was.

" If you're calling to remind me how lonely I am, don't bother, James." I said with a sigh.

" Hey."

Edward.

I sat up quickly, " Hi...I wasn't...I didn't expect you to call." I breathed

" I know; it's midnight there."

" Yeah."

There was a short silence.

" Did you get my gift?"

" I did...Thank you, they are gorgeous. But you need to stop spending money on me."

He laughed.

I missed that sound.

" I wish you were here." I said quietly.

" I wish I was there, too. I'll be back soon."

" Good."

" I'll talk to you soon, okay? Happy New Year, Angel."

" You, too."

" Bye, Bella."

" Bye, Edward."

I sighed deeply and hung up the phone, setting it on the coffee table. After not hearing his voice for so long, it made me long for him desperately. I hoped that once we saw each other next, things would be better and I could call him mine again.

I wanted to feel his lips on mine, feel us connecting the way we had the night before he left. My mind flashed with memories of that night and I curled into myself, hoping that I could have that back. I wanted the moment. I wanted him.

Tears sprung my eyes but I held them back, taking a deep breath. I had to think positive.

Because without that I wouldn't have anything to hold on to.

~\\~

" I've never seen you so happy to be at work." Jenna noted as she took down the last of the lights.

" Yeah, well..."

" Who is he?"

" He's...a boyfriend...Well, we were on a break after some shit happened, and he called me on New Years when it was midnight here. And I'd gotten earrings from him for Christmas. And it sounds like he wants to get back together with me."

" Wait, he like, broke up with you? Girl, why are you going to take him back?"

I helped her roll up the lights and shook my head, " No. It's not like that. He came here to attend Juilliard, and I told you that I was from Washington. We met there when his family moved to Washington in the spring. One thing led to another and we started going out. He has always wanted to go to Juilliard, it was his plan forever. Well, we did the long distance thing, I graduated early, and I was going to go to NYU, as you know, and I still am, but we had to wait in order to be together because he started last August and I start in about a week now. But it really strained us for awhile so we mutually agreed that a break was the best option because we were fighting and we were frustrated. Well, the same day I left my house because of issues and was staying with my friend, who's also his friend, and then I was on my way here around the time he was going to Washington for Thanksgiving break. And now he's been in Washington with his family for Winter/Christmas Break."

" You didn't see him between the breaks?"

" No. We weren't even talking then."

She smiled, " That's kind of sweet that he called you even though he's three hours behind us."

" Yeah, I really love him. He's amazing."

" Cute?"

" Definitely."

" Well, I'm happy for you. It's crazy seeing you smile."

I flipped her the bird and she laughed and threw a stuffed reindeer at me. I shoved it in a container and helped her take down the rest of the decorations before we opened for the day. It was insane that I was actually looking forward to something; seeing Edward.

~\\~

January 4th

~\\~

" You must be Bella! It's so awesome to meet you! I'm Makenna!"

My mouth was almost dropped to the ground.

Holy fuck.

This was Makenna?

What are the odds that I was rooming with Edward's ex-girlfriend in high school that cheated on him with his best friend? Fuck, why would a girl like her cheat on him? She was gorgeous, and I bet they were like _the _couple in school.

She was actually about my height, with curly hair that went to her collarbone and it was a beautiful golden blonde color and her eyes were a light grey color. She was a little bit curvier than me, with hips that were more prominent, but I smirked when I saw her smaller chest.

Yeah, I beat her in that department.

Then again, how was I going to tell Edward that I was rooming with his ex...Awkward.

" This is my first year! My parents pulled some strings for me to graduate quicker in high school because I failed out two years... Not that it matters. Need help unpacking? I've already set up as you can see...kind of. I mean, we have our own rooms, but I put stuff in the little kitchen and what not!"

Pictures of Edward were showing in a few of my bags, and I did not want to deal with that my first day here.

" Uh, no, I can unpack my things. But thanks. Maybe you could help carry up my TV." I said, joking at the end.

" I'm so glad that these rooms are like apartments, too! And thank GOD you brought a TV; if I can't watch Gossip Girl I would go nuts! You're putting it in the tiny living room right? It's so small! But it's cool, anyways."

Holy fuck I'm going to kill this girl.

And Edward dated her at some point?

Knowing Edward now, she looked like the girl that he couldn't stand to be around. But he was probably different back then. I didn't know him all those years ago. I mean, she seemed nice, but she was preppy as fuck. Hot pink t-shirts, skirts and heels preppy, and the way she acted only added to it.

" Okay, well, I'm going to go mingle! I'll see you later, roomie!"

She hopped out of the room and shut the door behind her with a quiet click.

I sighed and walked into the small living room. Two armchairs were there and a small coffee table. I was dreading carrying the TV up here, but it would have to be done. I look in the small kitchen and dining area before finding my room. It was small, but it would do. There was a twin size bed, desk and a closet. There was a big window behind the bed though, and it overviewed the back of the building, which was the courtyard. I smiled and set my bag down on the bed. It was pretty uncomfortable, but luckily I had a nice fiber comforter.

Makenna was basically gone the entire day. I had completely set up my bedroom. My desk had all my books on my shelf, my laptop and a few other knick knacks and pictures of Edward and me. I hung up my shirts, and used my plastic bins under my bed for my jeans, skirts, shorts, pajama bottoms and bra's and underwear. I set up my iPod doc on my small end table and a few other knick knacks. I put up my posters, and then went downstairs and got my television upstairs from my car. Luckily, I was able to do everything in four trips. I sat down on my bed and looked out my window; seeing scattered people all around

This was going to be an adventure.

~\\~

The next few days were really interesting. Makenna was a pain the ass with excitement, and she was always smiling and bouncing around. It drove me insane. Luckily, I spent my time working and soon found myself the day before class at work.

" Holy fuck, that is epic. You are rooming with your boyfriend's ex-girlfriend...That's classic, Bella."

" I know! What the hell am I going to say? Hey, babe, I missed you. And hey, guess what, I'm rooming with your ex, how ironic!"

" Does she know?"

" No! I had to hide my pictures in my own room, but she knows I have a boyfriend. I just can't believe I got stuck with this."

Jenna laughed and patted my back, " Don't stress. I hope she doesn't become super bitch when she finds out though."

" Thanks, Jenna, that's so encouraging."

" Sorry, Swan. It's the truth."

I went to my register just as a customer popped up and took their order. At the end of the day, Jenna and I were closing, so we turned our sign to 'closed' and made some cider for ourselves and ate a few pastries that were left over for today.

It was great having someone here that was a good friend. Jenna is nineteen, and she also attends NYU, but she's not there for English, she is studying in Psychology right now, but we get along great and she's fun to talk to.

" So like, is he good at doing it? Is that why you guys are getting back together?" Jenna teased.

" Don't be jealous."

She sighed, " You're so right. I wish I had regular sex...What's it like?"

" I wouldn't know!"

" But you just said-"

" We did it once. The day before he left and I haven't seen him since then so..."

" Aw, so you are basically like a reborn virgin now?"

I shoved her shoulder, " Leave me alone."

" It's cute. Really. Kind of movie-esque, but sweet nonetheless. Was he all gentlemen like, or was he like my first time...Oh, god. The guy was like a jackrabbit."

" Too much information!"

She laughed and took a sip of her cider, " Oh, please. You still didn't answer."

" He was fine."

" Didn't you feel like you were being torn in half?"

" Fuck yeah!{

We both broke down in a fit of giggles, and I stared down at the cider.

" Man, there must be something in this stuff, but hey, I should get going. I walked here and I don't want to get mugged." I told her, rinsing out my glass.

" Alright, I'll lock it up, see you later girly. Have fun at class tomorrow."

" You, too!"

I went in the back and put on my coat and tied my scarf around my neck. I had on a pair of dark wash jeans, my black boots, and a burgundy Ralph Lauren sweater with my pea coat over it and my Burberry scarf with red going through it. I put my curly hair up in a high ponytail and brushed my hair out of my face, and stepped out into the cool air.

A shiver ran down my spine as I headed down the street. It was actually busy around here, even though it was ten. People were shopping in stores and stumbling out of bars drunkenly. I hugged my coat to me tightly and made my trek towards the college.

When I got back to the dorms, I saw Makenna in the small living room watching TV. I grabbed a Coke from the small fridge, and sat down in the other arm chair.

" So, what's your major?" she asked.

" Journalism. You?"

" Well, I actually wanted to go to Beauty College, but my dad was like, I am not going to pull strings for you to get into College if you want to go to beauty school. I haven't declared a major yet. I'm just looking forward to the parties. You look like you love a good party!"

I shrugged, " Yeah, I guess."

" But you look more like the let's-get-stoned kind of party."

I choked out a laugh, " I guess you could say that Makenna."

" Where are you from, anyways?" she asked.

For a moment, I contemplated lying to her about where I lived, but I didn't want to be a total bitch to her. She was at least trying to be nice to me, and even though she is annoying as fuck; I was lucky I had a roommate that wasn't a bitch and was disrespectful.

" Forks, Washington. About three hours from Seattle."

Her eyebrows raised, " Forks? I have an ex that moved there! That's so weird!"

" Yeah, pretty weird."

" So, how long have you and your boyfriend been dating."

" Spring."

" That's even more weird! That's when my ex-boyfriend moved to Forks. What's his name? Is it by any chance Ed-"

Then her phone went off loudly, saving me from this wrath early. She brought it to her ear and immediately started chattering on. I sighed, glad that I was saved from the question I knew was coming.

**Authors Note- Okay, so this note is IMPORTANT!**

**We are on chapter 25 of this story, and I only have 28 chapters written for The Story of Us, right now. Therefore, my pre-made chapters are coming to an end. Recently, I've been busy, but pretty stable, but I am going to try to keep my schedule regular. I will not go two weeks without an update, so don't worry. I am going to attempt normalcy to continue, but I wanted everybody to know this because I don't want you guys thinking that I am just not posting because I don't want to or whatever reason.**

**Hope you enjoyed the chapter!**

**REVIEWS get TEASERS! It's that simple!**


	26. I'm Here to Take The Sky

**Authors Note- Alright, Friday is here. I hope you guys enjoy this chapter and your weekend!**

**Disclaimer- S. Meyer owns all things Twilight.**

**Chapter Song: I'm Here to Take The Sky- Destroy Rebuild Until God Shows (DRUGS)**

~\\~

January 8th

Wednesday

BPOV

~\\~

It was my last day of freedom before school started. I took my time sleeping in, seeing as I had the day off of work; thank god. At around ten I got out of bed and tossed my hair up in a ponytail, put on a pair of shorts and a fitted pullover hoodie. I was planning on going down to get some breakfast and work out at the fitness center in the main floor of Third Avenue North.

I really like the building itself, and most things about the area. There are plenty of residential brownstones, movie theaters and small shops. Also some music clubs and a variety of restaurants, they are almost at every corner.

The great part is that by car it's five minutes from RBC coffee shop where I work, the only downside is that it's not that close to campus that much. But there is good parking so I can drive to Washington Square for the day and just walk around to my classes

But the rooms are spacious, and in each residence hall until have its own bath, kitchen and dining area, and it's pretty nice to have it so close instead of sharing shower units in one big room with a whole bunch of girls. It's all like small apartments, which is pretty nice. The kitchen has a fridge, stove, oven and sink. Then a small dining area with an even smaller table, but it's cool. Makenna brought silverware, pots, pans and plates, which is pretty nice. I had some wooden spoons, whisks and a few other appliances from when I had the apartment in December and November, so I was able to add to that, but I did also bring the television, too. We also have free internet and our own number to share in the room, even though we do have cell phones, but it's nice to have a main phone. We also have cable, and luckily I had connecting cords and what not. As for laundry, there is one main room in the resident hall to do it ourselves.

Then we have the study lounge, TV lounge, music and practice rooms, the main courtyard, fitness center ( which I definitely will make use of), the game room and a mini-theater, which I bet nobody will use because of the theater so close to us that we can walk there.

In the dining hall I had a turkey and avocado wrap and then went to the fitness center to do some running. Not many people were in here, but I popped in my ear buds and started running on the treadmill. I jogged for about an hour before going upstairs to shower and get dressed.

Once I was dressed I decided to head out and explore more of New York. I stopped at the Starbucks on 2nd Avenue and 9th and got myself a Peppermint Mocha and walked deeper into downtown to the shops, completely unable to resist going into Forever 21 and a few other shops. I bought a few things, but didn't want to spend too much.

As I was stepping out of the grocery store with two bags of things, I was heading to my car when I saw someone leaning against it casually. My entire body froze when I saw his face, and my heart leapt in my chest. It took everything in me not to drop all of my bags and run to him. Then I remember I had bread and that it wouldn't look good flat. I strode towards him, keeping my balance in my black ankle boots.

When I was face to face, standing less than a foot away from him I felt both of his hands come up to gently cradle my face. I moved from him and wretched open my door to the truck, setting the bags down on the bench seat before I turned to him and wrapped my arms tightly around his mid-section; holding him so tight that I was sure it proabably hurt. He didn't say anything to me, he just held me and rested his chin on the top of my head, rubbing my back softly and holding onto me just as tightly as I held him.

My body shuddered, not from the cold air, but from the familiar touch that set my body ablaze, and only he could do that to me. Edward was the only man who could make me feel the way I did in that moment.

" You're here." I choked out in pure disbelief.

" Don't cry, Angel." he whispered.

" What are you doing here? I mean, when did you get back?" I asked, pulling away from him.

He took both of my hands and rested them against his chest. " Last night I flew in. I came out today, and when I saw your car I just...Bella, I can't be away from you anymore. I've missed you so much."

" I missed you, too."

His arms locked around my waist and he held me closely to him. I sighed as I let myself go slack against him and let my body remember this feeling. It felt like forever. My entire body tingled and I felt his cold lips on my temple.

" I missed you so much, fuck, Bella. You have no idea."

" Everybody is probably staring at us."

" I know."

" We need to talk sometime." I whispered.

" Can it wait?" he asked hopefully.

" Only for a little while." I replied.

He lifted me up into his arms and I wrapped my legs around his waist, holding him in a tight grip. It felt like it had been years since I felt him against me like this. He held me up, his arms strong and his embrace warm and comforting. God, I'd missed this so much, feeling the tingling sensation just when he touched me, the feeling of being safe and secure; knowing nothing can hurt me,

I didn't care about all of the people around us, watching and probably thinking we were crazy and too affectionate.

This was a moment I'd always remember.

Too soon he set me down and pressed his lips to my forehead.

" How'd you get out here?" I asked.

" A friend."

" Oh, okay."

He wrapped his arms around my waist, " Do you happen to know someone else who can drive me around since I was ditched?"

" Maybe."

" Nice earrings." he complimented, sweeping my hair behind me.

I couldn't fight the smile, " Thanks, you might know the person who bought them for me."

" Sounds like a somewhat nice guy."

I shrugged and he leaned down once more and kissed my forehead, my cheeks, my nose, my chin...

" I adore you." he whispered, pressing his forehead to mine.

I wrapped my hand around his, " I love you."

" I love you, too. So much. I hope you never forgot that."

My head shook back and forth, " Never."

" Have you been okay here, all alone?"

" Edward, I can take care of myself." I said in a slightly defensive tone.

He cupped my cheek gently and rubbed his thumb over my cheekbone, " I know, you're a badass bitch, remember?"

I leaned into him once again, breathing in his scent. It smelled like he was wearing cologne, but there was also the familiar musk and cinnamon smell lingering.

" Want to go get some coffee or something?" he asked, running his fingers through my hair.

" I already got myself coffee earlier, but we can go anyways."

" Okay."

Edward kissed the top of my head before getting in on the other side of the car. I started it up and the engine roared to life. When he shut the door I leaned back and looked at him. He just smiled at me and grabbed my hand. Arriving at starbucks, I sat down on one of the couches while he got his coffee and then joined me. Probably trying to be respectful, he sat a good two feet away from me.

I cocked my eyebrow at him before scooting closer and leaning into him.

" I don't care that we had a falling out, or that you've been gone; we can talk about all of that after today. I just want to be close to you." I told him quietly.

His arm wrapped around my waist and sipped his coffee, " Okay." he said just as softly as I spoke.

" How was home?"

" Alright. I missed you like hell."

" How's school going?"

" Good, I like it. You excited to start?"

I nodded, " Yeah, I've been working constantly."

" Where?"

" RBC Coffee shop."

" Oh, really? They have great cider."

I squeezed his hand and chuckled quietly at him.

After we got coffee, Edward asked me if he could drop me off on campus. I did, and wasn't exactly happy about having to let him go, but he had my number, and I had his. He promised to call me tomorrow so we could go out to dinner and talk about things. He left me with a long, lingering kiss on my forehead. I wondered if he was purposely not actually kissing me; but I didn't let it get to me.

When I got back to the dorms, I slinked into my bed after a long day and looked at a picture of us from the summer that Alice took. We'd been napping on the loungers outside his house, our bodies tangled together with a beach towel covering our legs. The second picture in the frame was us at Prom. I smiled and went to my closet, grabbing a t-shirt, and then pajama shorts from the bin under my bed. With my hair tossed up, I went into the kitchen and unloaded the two bags of things. It was just cereal, bread, Jalapeño Frito's, Amp energy and a few other addictions of mine.

In my bedroom I opened up the window, feeling the cool air on my skin. I leaned out the window as I smoke a cigarette, I didn't want the smell in the room considering at the end of the month the DA comes in to check our rooms and the apartment's overall condition. When I was finished I put the filter in the pack and secured it in a drawer.

~\\~

When I awoke the next morning, it was the obnoxious sound of Makenna's alarm going off.

In the .room.

I groaned and rolled over, glad that my first class was at ten thirty. The alarm stopped and I sighed, curling up in my blanket and ignoring the sound of her bumping around. It sucked that the walls were thin, but at least we had our own rooms.

Three hours later at nine I got out of bed. Makenna was long gone and I got in the shower and got ready for the day. I let my hair air dry while I did my makeup and got dressed in my boots, a pair of dark wash skinny jeans, and a lace long sleeved shirt with a wide v-neck line over it that fell slightly off my shoulders. I took time curling my long hair, sprayed on my perfume and went into the kitchen to eat some cereal, and then brush my teeth. I never understood why people brushed their teeth and then ate breakfast...

After loading up my heavy as fuck school bag, I got into my car and headed to Washington Square, main campus. I knew my classes after having touring around so I wouldn't be running around campus like a fucking idiot not knowing where to go.

~\\~

I had a Journalism and Society class, Journalism and Literature, Methods and Practice, Journalism Seminar, Journalistic Inquiry and Topics in Media Criticism. All these classes I was going to be taking throughout the entire week. I didn't have to take an extra required math classes, because I had taken them all in high school so I wouldn't have to take them here. Thank fuck.

Today, Wednesday, I only had Topics and Media Criticism from ten thirty to one and the Journalism and Society from four to six thirty. I liked my professors, they seemed nice and I enjoyed them pretty well.

Monday I had Journalism and Literature, and it was from noon to two fifteen, and then I had two thirty to five Journalism and Society class, and then had an hour and a half to get something to eat before I had my class at six thirty to nine thirty Seminar class.

Tuesday I had Journalistic Inquiry at eight in the morning until ten thirty, and then a class from twelve fifteen until two which was Methods and Practice.

Thursday was only Journalism Seminar from six thirty at night until nine thirty, which kind of sucked considering it was my only class that day.

Friday was Journalism and Literature but it was at eleven until one fifteen, and then Methods and Practice from one thirty until two forty five.

Between that schedules, I worked a little bit, but still made sure I would have time for homework and what not. I was really looking forward to all the classes, and my first day had actually gone pretty fantastically.

On my way back to Third North, I stopped at a Jimmy John's on campus and picked up a sandwich because I'd not even really had that much of a dinner. When I got back to my dorm, my great day didn't end.

As I walked through the door, my phone went off and I saw it was Edward calling me. Immediately I answered the phone to talk to him. He wanted us to go out tomorrow and talk, but I had class tomorrow from six thirty to nine thirty, and the hours didn't mix. We planned instead to meet on Friday, because my last class gets out at two forty five, and his at around six. So we planned to meet up at seven at Red Lobster

Makenna was back by ten that and we watched Friend's on my television. Hey, at least the girl liked that show. I could stand her a little bit more. Edward was going to be surprised when I told him this. I just hoped it wouldn't be awkward.

" So, what's your boyfriend's name?" Makenna asked randomly. " You never did tell me."

I kept my face composed and casually looked over at her, trying to pull out an effortless look. but what the hell, I probably looked scared.

" Uh...Edward."

She laughed, " Really? I dated an Edward, in high school. He was so hot. Also my first, but then I totally got with his best friend. Plus, Edward was like all about his medical problems. He had all these issues, and had something stupid called like...Martians something. I don't know. Well, his family was all about that after, and he was like depressed. So I just moved on. He was pretty good in bed though for his first time."

" I see." I said shortly, trying not to claw her eyes out at the last comment.

" Yeah, well, he's probably ugly now or something. Wait, you said you met in Forks? and his name is Edward?"

" Look, Ma-"

Her phone saved the fucking day.

Again.

Praise the lord, her phone.

"Whatever, as I said, my ex is ugly probably. And I know you wouldn't date him. You look like a preppy guy type, huh?" she said before answering her phone.

Fuck you, bitch.

~\\~

My second and third day of classes was also pretty great, and when I got to the coffee shop for work I was stuck with Kelsey. She's a bitch to me for some reason I don't even know, but it was only a few hours this afternoon after school, and then I could go see Edward. I'd driven to work today, because I didn't exactly want to walk in my Jimmy Choo ankle boots. I also wore a pair of dark skinny jeans, a grey sweater with short gathering sleeves, with a sharp dropped blazer, and then used my colorful coach bag for color.

I curled my hair and went the extra mile with makeup, something I haven't done in awhile.

Work seemed to go by quick, and when I found myself walking towards the table at Red Lobster towards Edward, everything seemed so surreal. He slipped out of the booth and took me into his arms briefly, kissing the top of my head. I smiled and set my bag down at the end of the bench, and slipped my blazer off.

" Hey." I breathed.

" Hi."

I smiled at him and grabbed my menu. A waitress came over for drinks and we also gave her our food order. I already knew what I wanted and Edward had been here first so he'd already gotten a chance. After the waitress left, Edward leaned back with a sigh; staring at me.

" Where do we start."

" I'm rooming with your ex." I blurted out without thought.

He looked confused, " What?"

" Makenna? You're ex-girlfriend? Yeah, she's my fucking roommate. Small world, huh?"

" You're messing with me."

" Nope."

" Wow...Uhm, is that going okay?"

" Well, she doesn't know I'm with you. She told me all about your nice relationship, and how you got 'Martians something'. Apparently she failed two years in high school, and she just started this semester because her dad 'pulled some strings'."

Edward laughed, " Seriously?"

" Yeah. She also called you hot, and then finished off by saying you're probably ugly now."

He frowned, " That's discouraging."

" You aren't ugly, knock it off."

" I'm just going to be upfront. I'm not going to be a fucking pansy ass and dance around it. We should have talked more. A lot more. And I shouldn't have been insensitive towards the end. I know your tough, but I think we both know the vulnerability and dependency when it comes to each other. I'm a fucking, man, but I'll admit it. "

I nodded and let him have the table so to speak.

" Bella, I'm sorry for all of the stupid fights that I started, about all of it; especially when it came to James. I was acting like an insecure little bitch, and you didn't deserve to deal with that. I flat out told James I wanted him to keep an eye on you, and I was contradicting my words when I told you everything I did. And the whole drunk text situation… All of it was completely out of line and it only added to a downfall, but I hope you know that nothing happened that night. I wanted us to go on a break because I didn't want us to be ruined... I didn't want to continue on that path and have it all come crashing down on our fucking heads. When you couldn't make it out to Halloween, fuck I was devastated. The first few weeks were hard here without you, and I should have thought it was just the same for you. When I thought about Halloween, I was so excited. I know that your life can't revolve around me and the same for you. I should have understood that you had work, and not ignored you when you called. I feel like an asshole for doing that to you, because you'd never do that to me; ever. I just hope you understand that I know I made those mistakes, and I am sorry about it."

" I'm sorry, too..I freaked out over stupid things...And about Halloween; Edward I wanted to be there but I couldn't. I was working so much to get my mind off of you not being there, and I know that I was starting to act distant and bitchy. I shouldn't have gotten drunk at James' though. I knew it was a bad idea then, and I know it now. Nothing happened, but after his confession that summer I should have been careful anyways. Both you and I had expressed what we felt about the situation, and I should have respected the fact that you didn't feel comfortable with me getting drunk with James. But you need to trust me."

" I did trust you. It was my insecurity of us being so far away from you. I felt like I couldn't protect you and that's all that I've wanted to do all along. And you weren't acting bitchy; I knew why you were getting distant. It's what you do when you're upset, and I can't blame you. I apologize for everything, but I won't apologize for having us take a break. We both needed to be able to get what we needed straightened out. I wish that I could have been there when everything with your dad happened, though."

" It's not your fault, Edward. I wanted you to come here. This was your dream, and I wouldn't have ever made you give it up. You belong here, Edward. You deserve to live out your dream after all of the things you've been through."

" Don't you see that you do, too." he said, reaching out to stroke my jaw.

" That's irrelevant."

" Bella..."

" We need to forgive and move on. Both of us are here now. So unless that break embargo is still on..."

He rolled his eyes, " Have you not heard me you stubborn, beautiful girl? I want to be with you. I can't not be with you."

" Is this the cheesy moment when we say we need to start over?"

" We aren't cheesy or typical."

" I know."

Edward gave me a playful smirk, " I say we pick up from the night I left."

I rolled my eyes at him and he grabbed my hand over the table.

" Of course."

" Bella, I love you." he said, his eyes holding all the emotion that I could feel in the world.

" I love you, too."

He smiled and used his thumb to rub circles on my palm soothingly. I marveled at the feeling of his hand in mine, missing the feeling so much more than I had actually thought.

" How was your first days at class?"

" Good. I like it."

" I knew you would. Now we've just got to get you out to party."

" I'll save that for my roommate."

" God, I can't even believe that. How fucking awkward is that?"

I shrugged and leaned back on the bench, stabbing the food with my fork, " What, you don't want to have your previous girlfriend who you had sex with, with your recent girlfriend you have sex with to be in the same room?"

" You said 'have' not 'had'. Does that insinuate something?"

I rolled my eyes at him," You are such a guy."

He chuckled, " Fuck, I missed you. You know how badly I am dying to kiss you right now."

" I don't kiss until after the date."

" Hilarious. Do you maybe want to come to my dorm tonight? Brett is probably party-ing it up somewhere tonight and I want to spend some time with you."

" Okay."

He changed the subject, " Have you talked to your father at all since you've been here?"

" Not once."

" I wish I could have been there for you through it. I've hated not being able to see you...Your hair got really long."

I touched a lock with my finger, " Yeah. I haven't gotten it cut. Nice of you to notice."

" I missed your scent, your laugh, your fucking beautiful brown eyes. I missed everything about you. Even the way you get all defensive and I-can-do-it-myself when I try to help you with something."

" You know how to flatter a girl."

" Mm, not just any girl. My girl."

~\\~

When we got to Juilliard after a ride in my car, Edward had led me up to his dorm immediately, seeming very eager for me to see where he was living. He lived in a very nice building, hell; the buildings for classes were really nice. Edward definitely was not slumming it. He lived in the Rose Building, which was absolutely awesome with not only construction wise, but the view that it had.

Once he opened up his room, I looked around at the small space. Edward's bed was on the left with his desk at the end and a closet and organized space for his things. Everything seemed well put together, although his bed wasn't made; it was almost flawless. His music lay across the desk, his laptop there and a few books open. He had bins under his bed also, like I did.

But his roommate's side, Brett, was a total mess. Clothes were strewn everywhere and just all of his things lying on the floor on his side or on his bed. His desk wasn't even recognizable at this point; it was covered with empty soda cans, more clothes, papers and books with bent pages.

" Sorry about my slob of a roommate."

" It's not a big deal."

The walls in here were actually painted, and they were a dark red. I went over and sat on his bed, seeing my pillow tossed over it. I picked it up and it was saturated in his scent instead of mine as it once had been.

" Smells like you."

" Unfortunately."

He sat next to me and held my hand. I ran my free hand over his bed sheets and Edward stood up and shrugged off his jacket to hang it up. The room had a thick, manly smell to it, not in a bad way. I could smell Old Spice, Edward's rich cologne, Axe body spray, cinnamon and a slightly sweet scent that smelt a little bit like girls perfume.

" It smells like girl's perfume." I noted.

" Go over by his bed. I swear to god, I've walked in on him having sex more times than I can count."

" You're seeing naked women that aren't me?"

He chuckled, " I've seen a few scrawny asses or five. Maybe some boobs...Everything pales in comparison to you. Your ass is the cutest I've ever seen."

The clock said that it was eight twenty, and I was glad I was able to spend a few hours with him before leaving. Dorm hours on Friday for mine were all night, and for the rest of the days, Saturday through Thursday, were until midnight. His room was warm, and I stood up slowly and slipped my jacket off, draping it lightly over Edward's desk chair. I looked around the room for a moment before settling my eyes on him.

He sat back on his bed, long legs crossed at the ankles in an elegant manner. His eyes were on mine, and I felt myself shiver under his gaze. Edward watched me as I sat down on his bed, and I felt him reach forward to grasp my ankle. He slipped my shoes off, dropping them next to his bed.

" As I've always said, sexy as hell, but you should take them off."

I smiled and kneeled up on the bed, wrapping my arms around his neck. Our eyes connected and I leaned my body into his, his eyes slowly closing in a lusty gaze.

" Kiss me?"

He didn't have to be asked twice.

His lips crashed down on mine in a searing kiss and it was something so different from all the kisses we've shared. I felt all of the longing and want, the desperation and finally the meeting of a kiss that we've been waiting for.

My fingers wound through his bronze hair, and his hand touched my waist, squeezing gently. I wrapped my free arm around him and pressed my chest to his. The feeling of his body against mine was breathtaking, and I felt him slowly lying back on the bed.

Every nerve in my body was on edge, and I finally felt connected to him again. It had been so long since I'd felt his lips on mine. The passion and now the love that was put into it made it even more intense. I didn't want to let him go. It had been too long.

His lips were soft and urgent against mine, and the way his tongue flicked over my lip ring drove me absolutely crazy as it always has. I only returned the favor and earned a quiet noise from him in return. Nothing felt rushed, but it was still fierce and lust-filled. I rested my body on top of his, melting slowly into him.

I felt him shifting below me, and his firm grip on my waist suddenly found me being pushed to the edge of the bed with him above me, straddling my waist as he moved his hips against mine in a slow rhythm.

" God I missed this." he moaned, slanting his mouth over mine and delving his tongue into my mouth, cradling my face in his hands.

I ran my hands down his sides and returned his kiss, giving into him and letting my body take over for awhile. His hands moved over me, as if he was re-familiarizing himself with my body and what I enjoyed. Just feeling his hands on me was enough to set me on fire. The feel of his soft tongue on mine, massaging against my own and tasting my mouth. God, it left me breathless.

We laid in his bed after making out in his bed shamelessly like the teenagers we were. I lay with my head on his chest, my hand resting on his stomach with slow movements. His hand ran up and down my arm, making me doze off just the slightest. I always slept better in his arms. Peaceful.

" I missed this." he murmured.

" I did, too."

" Just laying with you...It's enough."

I snuggled into his chest and ran my hand over his stomach and his rib cage. He'd gotten skinnier, if that was even possible. He's always been so skinny. I knew that he wasn't the only one who lost weight though.

" You need to gain some weight. I can tell you lost some."

" Just a little. Don't worry." he assured, kissing my forehead.

" I can't not worry."

" You know how many nights I'd dream of this...I'd tell myself that you were waiting outside the building to get in, and I'd sneak you in, and we'd come up here."

I smirked, " Is that the end of that fantasy?"

" Mm, well...It included some lingerie...and some really tight shorts and a tank top. Maybe we'd sneak into bed for a little something."

" Only a little?"

" Okay, alot."

I smiled and buried my face into his neck, laughing and missing being silly with him and talking about mindless things.

" Do you think that if we couldn't make it long distance, that we won't be able to..."

" To, what, Edward?"

" Long-term."

I sat up and looked at him.

" No. When I'm with you everything is fucking perfect. And things were okay when we were away from each other, I just missed you so much that it drove me a little crazy and I lost sight of the important things."

" You're not worried?"

I shook my head and ran my hand down his jaw, " No, because I'm not going anywhere."

Edward smiled, " I wouldn't let you anyways. You're fucking mine, now."

He leaned down to kiss me fiercely before resting his head next to mine, his face close to mine.

" I still can't believe those assholes at Columbia didn't accept you."

" It doesn't matter. NYU is great, and it's ten minutes away from what I need most. Yeah, Columbia would have looked good down the line for jobs, but this will suffice."

We laid in Edward's bed for awhile, talking about what had been going on while he was gone, and also laughing about other things. Unfortunately, at some point, I had to head back to my dorm because it was a little late. He walked me downstairs and gave me a long, lingering kiss by the car, whispering that he couldn't wait to see me soon.

And I couldn't wait either.

**Authors Note- Back together, but there are still a lot of things to work out. Like what happens when Summer comes around? What about Charlie? Hmmm,**

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	27. A Second Glance

**Authors Note- Hello everybody, Happy Sunday? READ END NOTE!**

**Disclaimer- S. Meyer owns all things Twilight.**

**Chapter Song- A Second Glance by: A Day to Remember**

~\\~

January 19th

Saturday

BPOV

~\\~

" I really don't think this is a good idea."

" She keeps asking about who my boyfriend is! Let's just get it over with."

" Bella..."

" Don't be such a baby."

" Hey, don't be calling me names." he berated, poking my side.

I rolled my eyes and unlocked my door, " Come on. Now you can show her what she's missing."

" Fuck that. She might turn into a crazy bitch."

I pushed the door open and saw Makenna, as usual, sitting in front of the TV with a blank look on her face. Edward held my hand and we walked straight past her into the kitchen. She waved at me, her eyes still glued to the TV, and I dropped my keys on the counter with a loud _clank_. Edward put down a bottle of red sparkling grape juice next to it. It was after New Years, but he was feeding an addiction that I still had.

" How'd she not see me?"

" I don't know, your fucking tall as hell."

He glared and I grabbed his hand, heading into the living room when finally Makenna took her eyes from the television and noticed Edward standing there. Her eyes were wide, and for a moment it looked like she saw a ghost before she composed herself and let a smile spread over her face.

" Hey, Bella! Who- Holy shit! Edward Masen? This is who you're dating! This is my ex I was talking to you about! Wow, small, small world!"

Her voice raised octaves as she continued to speak, and I fought a chuckle at her behavior.

I felt Edward shift behind me, resting his hands on my shoulders as he pressed up close to me, as if he were using me to block the space between him and Makenna. I reached up to grasp his wrist and he moved his hand to rest on our side.

" Uh, yeah."

" Wait, did you know I was his girlfriend before?"

" I did."

" Aw, why didn't you tell me? Hey, I'm not pissed. But it's so great to see you, Edward. And I thought you couldn't possibly look better...And wow you got taller." She said, licking her lips as she gave him a once over.

He kissed the top of my head, " I guess I did."

A grimace passed her face, " Still holding that thing about Matt against me? Look, Edward; it wasn't my idea. He was totally desperate and I felt bad."

Edward rolled his eyes, " I don't care anymore, Makenna. Shit happens so better shit can happen. That's why I have Bella."

" Such a small world...Oh, so you are going to Juilliard? You always talked about that."

She actually had a memory?

" Yup." Edward said shortly, wrapping his arms tighter around me.

An annoying, girlish giggle escaped her," That's great! But, hey, I'm meeting some friend's and I'm sure you don't want me to crash your party, so I'll see you later. Sock on the door, Bella! The walls are thin in here!"

She shut the door and Edward groaned.

" Fuck she got more annoying."

" I know, but she acts so nice to me it's so hard to hate her."

He chuckled and I went back into the kitchen to grab the grape juice. I pulled on his hand and dragged him into my room, shutting the door behind me. When he looked around, his eyes fell on the pictures of him and me, he smiled.

" I like these pictures."

" Me, too."

I opened the bottle and took a swig, watching him as his eyes scanned my room. I found it funny as he glanced over things twice, noticing every detail. But he always glanced back to look at the pictures of him and I, and it made me happy that he was just as fucking glad as I was to be together again.

He suddenly turned around and grabbed onto my waist as I struggled to put the bottle down. I squealed as he went to lay back on the bed with me in his arms, hanging onto him tightly. Just as I hit the mattress, I heard a loud smack, and looked up to see that he had smacked his head on the window frame behind my bed.

" Oh, fuck!"

I honestly couldn't help myself. I laughed at him as I lay beneath him on the bed, one hand over my mouth and the other reaching up to touch his head.

" Are you okay?" I struggled out

He sat up and rubbed the back of his head, wincing just slightly as he did.

" Keep laughing, Bella. I don't think the world can hear you."

" I'm sorry, that was just so funny."

" First my overly happy ex and then I smack my head and my girlfriend laughs at me. This night is great."

" Oh, please, we went out for dinner, and I let you play grab-ass on the way to the car."

He pushed me back on the mattress and hovered above me, his hands attacking my sides. I struggled underneath him between breaths and squeals; and then he was smart enough to jerk back and smacked the back of his hand on the wall.

" Goddamnit!"

Edward slumped down on my bed and I leaned over him and kissed his hand.

" Are you okay?" I asked with a light laugh.

" Stop laughing at me woman!"

I trail kisses down his face and to his neck, turning from chaste to more than that. His arms wrapped around my waist, pulling me close to him and pushing my shirt up slightly to graze my skin with his smooth fingers.

Edward quietly moaned while my lips attach to his neck and my hands run over his body. These days, it almost felt like I was re-familiarizing myself with him, my hand wandering over familiar places but still new in the same way. As my hands trailed under his shirt he loosened his arms on me and let me pull it off of him as he sat up.

The familiar planes of his chest were exposed to me, and I traced them with my fingertips, feeling him shiver below me as I sucked on his neck, feeling the vein pulsing heavily underneath my tongue.

" Fuck, that's going to leave a mark. I don't know if I care or not." he groaned out, pressing his hands into my hipbones.

I pulled away and kissed over the mark on his neck, smoothly laving it with my tongue before moving to his lips. I straddled him firmly and bowed my body over him, finding myself completely lost in Edward as my lips captured his over and over again. I felt his hands loosen on my hips and slowly move to my shoulders, applying slightly pressure.

" I think we should stop." Edward said suddenly, pulling away breathlessly.

" What?" I asked, sitting up and pushing my hair back from my face.

He fidgeted for a moment avoiding my gaze, " I think maybe we should wait awhile until we start having sex."

Feeling a little bit rejected I moved off of him and sat down at the edge of my bed. I felt him do the same, and saw him rubbing his neck where I marked him. It was pretty obvious, I kind of felt bad that he wouldn't be able to cover it up with a shirt, or a jacket or scarf. He reached down for his shirt and slipped it on, tugging at the hem for a moment before grabbing one of my hands.

" You don't want to?" I asked him.

" Believe me, I want to. But, I just want to take a little time to work on other things besides the physical aspect of our relationship."

" Edward, you kind of sound like a girl."

He shook his head, " I'm being serious."

" I know, and if you want to give it awhile then alright."

" I'm not saying months, maybe just a few weeks... We've just started up again; I don't want to go fast with us."

My hand squeezed him, " Okay, Edward. Hey, I just wanted you to know that I want you, and I love you. " I said softly, looking over at him.

He smiled at me, " I love you, too."

I stood up and walked to the middle of the room, and turned to face him with my hands on his hips.

" So, what do we do now."

" Get your cute ass back over here, love."

When I got close enough he pulled me down towards him, wrapping his arms around me. I smile and reach for his hand, grasping it in mine. He turned his head to kiss my temple softly, squeezing my hand in his as he braided out fingers together.

" Are you happy?" he asks suddenly.

I furrow my eyebrows, " Why are you asking?"

" I mean, with everything going on with your father... I just want to know that you are happy."

" No, I'm not happy about that. I've never been happy about it. What can I do? By some miracle I am here with you, and that's all that matters. Fuck everything else. You're all I need. If I focus on all the negative...I'm only going to do what I did before. I want to live. I'm tired of feeling held down by things and people."

" I want you to always be happy."

" You help."

" Is that so?"

" Yeah. When I look at you I think of all the amazing things that I could have."

He quirked an eyebrow, " Isabella, are you telling me that you want me to father your children?"

I rolled my eyes, " Please."

" Do you want kids?"

" I don't think so."

" Why not?"

I shrugged, " I don't think I could be a good mom."

" What about marriage?"

I looked over at him, " Yeah, that works out so well for my family."

" You aren't them. One day, I'm going to ask you to marry me and you are going to say yes."

He pulled me closer to his side and I rested my head on his chest.

" Stay with me tonight."

" I want to."

" I'll marry you if you do."

" Yeah?"

" Yeah."

" Deal, Mrs. Masen."

I pinched his side, " Don't get any ideas."

Minutes later I found myself passed out in bed. Edward stayed with me awhile longer, taking a short nap himself before leaving at around eleven. I walked him downstairs and ran into Makenna on my way up. I changed into my sleep clothes and was cleaning two cups that Edward and I used in the kitchen before going to sleep.

" So, is Edward, like, pissed at me or something?"

" No."

" It sure seems like it. Did you ask him?"

" We didn't exactly talk about you, Makenna. But he doesn't seem angry at anybody." I said simply.

She let out a huff and left the room. Her bedroom door shut and I rolled my eyes.

Girls will be girls...

~\\~

January 21st

Monday

~\\~

I was unfortunately working a late shift from ten to closing, which was midnight at the shop. Jenna wasn't here, it was just the manager and I. It was pretty empty here, just a few students hanging around and doing random shit. I sat back on my stool, breathing out a deep sigh and ran my hands over my face.

Between school, studying and work; I barely have time for anything much else. I knew that I didn't have to work on the weekdays, I could do weekends, but I wanted to get all the hours I can. I might have my entire school costs covered, but by the time I get out of college I didn't want to survive on my savings, I wanted to have extra money. I wasn't going to be a fucking bum if I had time to work.

Edward wasn't working, but he was always at class or practicing in the music rooms. He's been playing so much now, and I was glad he was enjoying his classes and what he was doing. I'd never seen him so passionate about anything before.

And having him back in my life definitely made things make a turn for the better in my life. I'd fucking missed him so much, and we were trying to find time in our schedule to go out to dinner, or just hang around in our rooms. It was easy, just like how it always had been, but we still had the silent intensity between us that I couldn't explain.

" Excuse me, but I'd like some cider." I heard a familiar, smooth voice say.

I looked up and saw Edward leaning against the counter, bundled up in a pea-coat, but still wearing his flat shoes with a checkered design on them. It didn't matter that it was snowing, he still dressed like he did in the summer.

" What are you doing here?"

" Just bugging my girlfriend at work."

I smiled, " It's not a bother. Cider?"

" Mhm."

I fixed up his drink as he sat on a stool at the bar, leaning forward towards me with a smile on his face.

" How was class?"

" Long. You?"

" Same. I can't wait to collapse in my bed. Not that it's anything to brag about."

He chuckled, " I told you I was going to take you out and get you another fiber cover for that damn mattress. It's like sleeping on cardboard."

" Better than nothing."

Edward shrugged and I gave him the warm cider. He took a sip and sighed as it hit his tongue.

" Good cider, Swan."

" Anytime, Masen."

I leaned forward and kissed him quickly, but he caught my chin and held me there for an extra moment.

" No kissing the customers, Bella!" my manager said, coming up behind me.

I caught a sense of déjà vu and smiled.

" I can't help myself. Sometimes they are just too irresistible."

Marcus laughed at me, " Yeah, sure."

After sitting back at my stool, I was able to spend a short amount of time with Edward before he had to leave because of class in the morning. He left me with a lingering kiss and a promise for me to text him when I get in.

If I thought he was protective before, when I have a late day he always makes me text him; no excuses. I generally drive around here because it's been too cold to walk. Even though I drive, he makes me call him for his peace of mind. I know Edward walks here; I don't know how he does it in this cold weather but apparently he can somehow survive it.

When I got back to my dorm later on, I walked in and was completely not expecting to see such a nice sight displayed out in front of me.

My roommate, with some mysterious guy going at it in the armchair and they were obviously completely buck ass naked and completely oblivious to my presence until I slammed the front door shut and the light turned on.

God, not only did she park her ass in that goddamn fucking chair every fucking day, but she was screwing some guy in it? The moment the light was on she screamed and used her just-as-naked-as-her human to cover her.

" Oh my god! I thought you were staying at Edward's!"

" I was working! Fuck, you know my schedule, Makenna! It's on the goddamn white board so this shit doesn't happen!" I yelled.

" Hey, this doesn't have to be a bad thing...What's your name?" the guy asked, his head turning to me as he winked.

" Dream on, fucktard. Either gets your clothes on and you move this party, or it ends."

Makenna glared at me, " Do you have to be such a jerk? Can't you just go hang with Edward."

" It's twelve fifteen! I have to fucking get up in six and a half hours, so if you don't mind, wrap this up. Or go in your goddamn room."

" God, Bella. You're such a prude."

Was I really arguing with a naked girl? I had no fucking clue why I was still standing there.

" Really? I'm not even going to fight with you about this, Makenna. It's goddamn pathetic that I have to sit here and berate you about this. You know what, whatever, have fun tonight. I'll get out of your way."

Grabbing what I could from my bedroom, I slammed the door shut and shuffled downstairs out of the building. I headed towards my car as I sent a text to Edward and started to head towards Julliard's dorm buildings. He replied instantly, luckily, and when I pulled up to his building I hopped out and shut off my car.

Edward was waiting by the entrance, wearing just a pair of jeans and socks, looking completely exhausted and half asleep. His hair was sticking up everywhere and he looked so cute like that, but I felt bad for bothering him.

" What's going on?"

" I walked into my room and saw Makenna fooling around with a guy. After two minutes of arguing, and her prince charming insinuating that it was 'a good thing' that I showed up, she was basically refusing to move her party."

" Wait, what? A good thing?"

" Are you really that tired? A threesome, Edward. He insinuated a threesome."

" Oooh, fuck no. Who is that piece of-

" Nobody. I'm tired, let's go."

When I walked into Edward's room after wrestling his key from him, I pleasantly walked in on his roommate Brett changing clothes. So basically he was naked with boxers around his ankles. As I stood there wishing that I could be swallowed up into a black hole.

" Fuck! How many naked people am I going to see tonight?"

" Dude, what the fuck!"

He quickly slipped his boxers on, " I didn't fucking know you were bringing your girlfriend in here!"

" It's okay, whatever. I just really want to go to sleep." I said, setting my things down and slipping my jacket off.

I was pulling my sweater off my body when Edward pressed against me, wrapping himself around me to cover my exposed skin.

" What are you doing?"

" Wearing a tank top to bed. Tell your naked roommate to turn around so I can change my pants."

" Just go to the bathr-"

I sighed in frustration, " Edward."

" Brett, turn the fuck around."

" You guys are no fun."

After changing into a pair of fleece pajama's, I combed my hair with the small comb in my purse, used a wisp on my teeth to quickly clean them; basically half-assing my usual routine, and slipped into Edward's bed as he folded his jeans into his drawer.

This was the first time I'd slept in his room overnight. We took a nap two or three times; considering that's really all we really do together, but never overnight. His bed was a twin size, but we were both skinny enough to equal one regular sized person when smashed up against each other. He had a body pillow pressed up against the wall, along with a few extra pillows that I found myself pressed up against an hour later. Edward was lying behind me with his hand on my hip and his face buried in my hair.

It wasn't exactly what I would call comfortable, even with the pillows. I felt suffocated.

" I can't breathe, Edward."

" Mm, Bella." he sighed, mumbling other words under his breath.

I sat up smoothly and moved his hand to the pillow, moving out of my spot quick enough for him to hug the pillows and for me to move to the other side of him. It was a quick maneuver, and he wrapped his arms around the pillow, hugging it to his body.

" Having fun yet?" Brett whispered from his bed.

" Fuck off."

" You know, even when you weren't here; he was constantly saying your name in his sleep."

_Really?_

" What can I say; I'm so amazing."

He laughed, " Okay, whatever."

I rested my back against Edward's and buried my face in his pillow, clutching what I had of the blanket to me. In his sleep, at around one thirty in the morning, Edward had found me and clutched me to him, luckily in a more comfortable way which finally made me fall asleep soundly as I curled up on his chest. He was warm and safe; something I missed when I slept.

Even though I had to leave early in the morning, Edward got up and whispered a quiet goodbye to me. I thanked him for letting me crash with him and was on my way towards NYU, hoping that I wouldn't have to find any naked people in my dorm room this time around.

~\\~

January 25th

Friday

~\\~

" Holy fuck. What're you wearing?"

" You said we were going to a party."

I grabbed my lip gloss and swiped it once more over my bottom lip before rubbing them together. Edward hooked his finger on the strap of my fitted tank top, until he trailed his long finger down my spine and to the belt loop of my skin tight skinny jeans.

His eyes feasted on my chest, and I knew he was going into his father mode and was going to tell me to put something on over it. Well, this time he wasn't getting his way. I turned around and wrapped my arms around him. He held me to his chest, cradling me closely and kissing the top of my head.

Numerous times I found myself in this moment, just standing in his arms while he held me. I think for both of us it felt amazing to be together again, and I couldn't get enough of being close to him. We were closer than we had been before, if that were a possibility. I ran my hands down his back and into the back pockets of his jeans.

" I'm going to have to bring a fucking metal bat to ward everybody off of you." he laughed, kissing my lips softly.

" I can take care of myself using my shoes."

He looked down, " That might be a correct statement."

Hands ran down over the sides of my black ribbed top, and lips moved to brush over my shoulders and collarbone. I leaned into Edward for just a moment before pulling away and flipping the light off in the bathroom. Makenna was lounging in her chair, a bowl of popcorn in front of her as she stared at the television. Edward slipped on his jacket as I put on mine and we headed out, taking the elevator down to the main floor.

We were heading over to Josie Woods Pub, and apparently not many people get carded. Edward was talking about it, and apparently he'd been in there a few times. It was basically a beer and burger and wings place; which was fine with me. I drove us there quickly, it not being too far away from the dorm, and hopped out, seeing a whole bunch of people hanging around outside in lines. A few were smoking, others making out against cars. I unzipped my jacket and tossed it in the backseat before getting out. Edward glared at me and looked back at the jacket I had carelessly thrown.

" What're you doing? It's fucking cold outside."

" But warm inside. And what if we get carded?"

" What does your jacket have to do with being carded."

I rolled my eyes at him and hopped out of the car. The bouncer stood protectively next to the door, standing taller when he saw our approach. Edward was easily taller than him, but this guy definitely was a bit more beefy than Edward. I let out a low chuckle as I stopped in front of the guy. He gave me a once over, which made me feel a little gross especially with Edward standing next to me.

" I.D." was all he said.

I tugged at the hem of my shirt, far enough to slightly expose the bright red lace bra I wore underneath the tight shirt. I reached into my pocket and took out my wallet, faking looking around for an ID in the compartments. It's not like he'd know that I was faking, we all knew what he was paying attention to.

I pushed my hair over my shoulder and looked up at him, my eyes wide.

" I must have forgotten it." I said innocently.

Just as he was about to speak up, I dropped my wallet to the floor, gasping quietly to add to my act. I bent down to get it, laughing when I heard his breathing hitch as he got a good look down my shirt, and the back where it raised up. I picked it up and slid my wallet into my pocket, smiling at him as I pushed my boobs together.

" Are you sure there isn't any way we could get in anyways?" I whispered lowly, seductively.

His eyes widened and he stepped away from the door, " Yeah, but don't say anything. Maybe I'll see you later?"

I smiled, " Definitely."

Edward grabbed my hand and pulled me through the door, pushing me up against the nearest wall once it closed. His hands were on either side of my face on the wall, his body pressed up against mine as a look of fury passed over him, eyes darkened

" What the fuck was that?"

" _That _was what got us in."

He was jealous. I could tell by how his nostrils flared and his eyes darkened. I put my arms through his that were around me, and wrapped my arms around his neck; leaning up to kiss him slowly.

" I'm sorry. You know I was just faking it, right?"

" Doesn't change the fact that you basically seduced him."

I laughed quietly, " Fake seduction. You are the only one I'd actually seduce, Edward. I love you."

Edward ran his fingers through my hair and kissed my forehead. I pulled away from him and grabbed his hand, pulling him into the loud music and dancing bodies. When we hit the bar bench, I immediately asked for a Corona, while Edward went with a Bud Light.

" Jaeger Shots? Hmm."

" Bella, don't even go there." he chuckled.

" Just one?" I asked, pouting at him.

" One. Now get something to eat. I don't want you fucking drunk off your ass without eating anything."

Edward ordered the chicken and cheese quesadilla's and jalapeño poppers, and we ate and sipped out beer as we did. He pushed his stool close to mine, keeping his arm around my waist. I knew he didn't like it when guys came up to me, but I didn't like it anymore when girls flirted with him.

I noticed a few people that were in my classes here, which was surprising. You don't often find someone with an English major in a bar. Once we finished eating, Edward pulled me off my stool and walked us to the middle of all of the dancing bodies. Before he could wrap his arms around me, I felt a hand wrap around my wrist and spin me around.

An unfamiliar body pressed up against me just then, and I shoved the person off. I looked up into the eyes of a guy with dark hair and brown eyes. He was very obviously drunk and trying to grind himself on me. Edward pulled me back against him and glared at him. My head spun from the quick movement and I leaned against him.

" Stay the fuck away from my girlfriend." he growled, holding me against his chest.

" Dude, calm the hell down. Can't blame a guy for wanting a hot piece of ass like that." he taunted, licking his lips.

Disgusting.

" You wish." I spat, coaxing Edward further into the crowd.

I pressed myself against him, feeling him pull me impossibly closer with his hands on my hips; pulling me flush against him. I roamed my hands to grab onto his hips, holding us together as we moved back and forth against each other. The way he held me to him was seductive, yet very protective.

Some loud song placed, which I could identify, was Nelly Furtinando played, the thrumming beat rocking the walls and the floor beneath us. Edward moved his hands up my waist and I lifted my arms above my head, moving slowly against him.

He pressed his lips to my ear, nipping and biting before lowly speaking into it.

" You're so sexy. Every guy is staring at you, and I'm the lucky son of a bitch who actually has you."

I smirked and threaded my arms around his neck. I kissed his jaw and grinded my hips against his, feeling him push forward against me also.

Two beers later, we were leaning against the bar and I was begging Edward to let me take two Jager Bomb shots. Obviously he was going to be the driver tonight, and I was going to let loose and have fun to my full potential.

He shook his head at me as the bartender poured the shots. I knew they were going to be rough, and that I was going to be so fucked up.

" Babe, you're fucking ninety pounds." Edward laughed as he wrapped his arms around me.

" Fuck, I don't care if you don't?"

The shots slid in front of me and I grabbed one and threw it back, groaning as I slammed it down on the bench. The bartender laughed and I leaned back against Edward. After the next one I could feel the burn, and the warmth churning in my stomach. It hit me hard about ten minutes later.

I forced Edward to dance with me, and I made a show of dancing around him and grinding. He laughed at me, but I could tell that he was very much enjoying himself. After the third shot I pressed Edward up against the nearest wall and attacked him. His lips responded to my quick tango, and his hands gripped my waist, pulling me up close to him. I didn't even care that he tasted like cigarettes and beer. Fuck it was good.

" I want you." I basically yelled over the loud music.

He smiled and pushed his lips against mine, moaning when they came in contact.

Fuck, I wanted to strip him down and have him right here. My hands tugged on his belt, and just as I was undoing it, he was pulling my hand away and chuckling against my lips. He didn't seem to understand my want for him, and I then moved my hands up the front of his shirt.

" Baby, slow down." he asked, kissing down my jaw and to my neck.

~\\~

Five Jager Bombs Later

~\\~

My head was pounding, my mouth tasted like stale alcohol, my eyes felt like they were pulsing and there was a body pressed up against me with a heavy arm around my waist. Any other time I would have curled up closer, but instead I pushed the arm off and groaned loudly as I sat up, my entire head screaming at me to just lay down.

I stumbled to the bathroom, not even bothering with the lights. I brushed my teeth and took a piss in the dark, and then went back to bed. Edward was fast asleep, but awoke as I lowered myself into the bed.

" Hey, how are you feeling?"

I groaned as his voice, wishing he'd whisper.

" Shhh."

He kissed the side of my head and slipped out of the bed. About ten minutes later he came back with a cup of coffee, water and pills.

" Here, coffee will help. Take the pills with water."

I did as he said, and drank the coffee quickly because I wanted to lie down. He pulled the blinds shut and got into bed with me, letting my head rest on his chest. He rubbed my back, kissing my forehead softly every few minutes to comfort me

" Please, don't ever let me go near Jager Bombs ever again."

" Oh, Bella." he chuckled.

" How'd we get here last night?"

" After you tried getting me naked after shot number four, I made you dance with me before leaving, and you snuck another shot. And then you wanted to try doing it while I was driving, and you proceeded to unbuckle my belt and pull my pants down. Took me about ten minutes to get here, and twice as long to get you completely off of me. Then you let us in the building and collapsed in the elevator, and I carried you the rest of the way. When I got you to bed, you seemed to have caught a second wind and pulled down my goddamn boxers and started dancing with them."

I covered my face with my hands, groaning quietly in embarrassment.

" Oh, Edward..."

He chuckled, " It's okay. I got them back from you and convinced you to get into bed and close your eyes as a contest. And then you woke up at around four thirty and you were throwing up for two hours before passing out in the bathroom and I had to carry you back in here."

I rested my head in the comfortable crook of his neck, nuzzling him there before passing out. Looking down I saw that I was in my underwear and tank top still; along with that lace bra. I sat up and slipped the straps off and unclasped it without taking my shirt off; and laid back down next to Edward.

" Mm, Bella go braless." he said, moving his hand up from my stomach.

" Nap." I told him, closing my eyes.

He kissed my forehead and wrapped his arms securely around me.

It was my favorite place to be.

~\\~

When I awoke later, the clock said that it was eleven. I sat up, stretching my arms out above me. My head was still hurting a bit, but as my senses were filled with the scent of coffee; I felt better. I reached over and felt around for Edward, but was only met with the cool sheets.

I grabbed Edward's hoodie that was thrown over my desk chair. It fell to my upper thigh, and covered me up a little bit more. My hair was tangled, and fell in odd waves to my waist. I ran my hand through it as I stepped out of the room, adjusting to the light that illuminated the room.

I followed the scent of the coffee, hearing low hushed voices. My eyes narrowed as I heard it was Edward and Makenna. When I turned the short hallway into the small kitchen, I saw Edward leaning against Makenna, and her hands on either side of the counter to trap him. She was leaning close to him, too close, and moving one hand to rest on his chest.

If I was an insecure person, I would've started crying and ran out in that moment. But I knew Edward, and I trusted him. He wouldn't do that to me. I cleared my throat she looked away from him and to me; her eyes widening. Edward pushed her away, his panicked eyes going to my more calm ones.

" Bella! I was just telling Edward, _your _boyfriend here, that I wasn't interested in getting him back. He's came on to me!" she said pathetically, her face turning red from her lie.

" Bella, don't-" Edward started.

" It's okay, Edward. I know what the fuck is going on here, I'm not stupid." I spat

Makenna laughed nervously, " You do?"

" Yeah, and I suggest you get the fuck out of this room and out of sight before I beat the ever-living shit out of you for even thinking, that for a moment, I would believe he came on to you, and not the other way around."

She left the room swiftly and Edward stood in the middle of the room.

" I swear to fucking god I didn't even touch her."

I stepped towards him and grabbed the hem of his white undershirt. My hands tugged up on it, and he seemed to understand what I was doing and helped me take it off. The cotton shirt fell to the floor, and I kicked it away and wrapped my arms around him, kissing the scar he had from the tube when he was in the hospital.

" I know you didn't. What was she saying to you?"

He laughed, " That she made a mistake all those years ago and she wanted me back. Apparently she thinks we would be good together, and she could fulfill all the needs I have that you can't fill for me."

I frowned, " I can fulfill every fucking need you have."

" Trust me, Angel, I know you can."

Edward lifted me up in his arms and clamped his hands together against my thighs, turning around to seat me on the counter as he stood between my legs. I closed my eyes as I felt his finger lightly brush over my cheek, lips caressing mine slowly.

" I think I need a new roommate."

" You've only been rooming with her for three weeks. Look, she'll back off, let's not go to extremes."

I nodded. He was right. And how was I going to get re-assigned. The explanation I have is completely invalid and sounds petty. Even though I hate that she's now coming on to Edward, I know that nothing will happen between them.

" So I shouldn't worry?"

He shook his head, " No. And anyways, I prefer brunette's."

" Just brunette's?"

" With pale skin, beautiful brown eyes..."

" Keep stroking my ego." I teased, running my fingers through his silky hair.

" Sexy body?"

I smiled and hopped down off the counter, drawing myself towards the coffee. I poured myself a steaming cup and added cream and sugar. The warmth of the drink made me feel instantly better. Edward sat at the table and pulled me down into his lap.

" I love you because of who you are. I wouldn't give a fuck if you gained a hundred pounds or if you bleached your hair and got colored contacts. None of that matters to me. Your good looks are just an added bonus."

" You'd still love me and my big fat pouch?"

Edward chuckled and rested his hand on my flat stomach. " Yes."

" I think you'd look funny if you gained a hundred pounds." I giggled.

He kissed my cheek, " Would you still love me?"

" It's possible. I only know how to love you in bean-pole form though."

With a swift slap on my thigh I yelped and laughed at him, setting my coffee down on the table and turning around the straddle his lap. He grabbed onto my hips, his eyes glaring at me as I smiled and rubbed the spot he slapped.

" You slapped me!"

" I did, and I might do it again if you don't stop teasing me." he said between gritted teeth, leaning forward to kiss my nose.

" If it makes you feel better I don't think you'd be able to gain a hundred pounds. You eat so much and stay almost skinnier than me!"

He smacked my ass and growled. I quickly scrambled off his lap and turned out of the kitchen, him hot on my heels as I picked up speed. He lifted me up and I let out a loud squeal as he spun me around.

" I love you Isabella Swan." he whispered in my ear.

I knew from then on that he was the only one I wanted to spend my life with.

**Authors Note- **

**So I want to send out a sincere apology for the late-ness of this chapter. Lately a lot of new things have been going in, and it's been keeping me plenty busy that it's hard to find time to sit down and write, and even edit a chapter. This weekend was very busy, and I am sorry I couldn't get the chapter out, but everybody who could receive teasers did get them, if you didn't get one, then your private messaging was enabled and there is nothing I can do about that.**

**Reviews still get teasers, even though chapter 28 is in construction. I can't promise a Friday update, though hopefully you will get one, but I hope you guys understand that I love you and I won't abandon my stories! There will at least be three updates a month, and I can guarantee no less than two if things are progressively busy. Rest assure that there will be updates every month a few times.**

**REVIEWS get TEASERS!**


	28. Perfect For Me

**Authors Note- This chapter is basically a lot of snippets of Edward and Bella in college, funny things that happen, some small drama, just pure random-ness that I just wanted to fill in.**

**Disclaimer- S. Meyer owns all things Twilight.**

**Chapter Song: Perfect for Me by: Ron Pope**

~\\~

Valentine's Day

Thursday

~\\~

Warm hands gently caressed my face, and smooth lips pressed against my neck. I groaned quietly and rolled over onto my stomach; only to feel a long, familiar body press up against the back of me. He kissed the spot underneath my ear, and I pressed back against him to relish in the feeling of his body against mine.

" Wake up, beautiful." he whispered quietly in my ear.

" Mm."

" Happy Valentine's day, love."

" Happy...Valen..tines...day." I said slowly and tiredly

" Open your eyes."

Slowly, my eyes peeked open and looked around. Edward had put vases upon vases of red roses on almost every surface. My desk, shelves, end table...On my end table was a heart shaped box of chocolates, and as I sat up I felt him clasp something on wrist. I was so lost in the sea of roses that I barely even registered it.

I looked down and saw a charm bracelet with two charms on it, one was a turtle with a blue and green lacquer on it, and the other was the outline of a heart that was all diamonds encrusted into it into the shape.

" I figured I'd add to this for a little while. Do you like it?"

I touched it gently and smiled up at him, " Edward, it's beautiful."

He took my hand and squeezed it, " The turtle is kind of random, but I thought it added color and you'd think it was cute."

" I love it, Edward. Thank you. And I love you."

He smiled at me, flicking one of the charms, " I love you, too."

" I got you something." I said, " I hope you don't think it's cheesy."

When I reached into my drawer, I shuffled around for a moment before I came in contact with the box. It was a black ring box, with a silver bow. I handed it to him and he looked confused for a moment as he held it carefully in his hands.

" Just open it."

He took off the ribbon and took off the cap on the box. Inside was a white gold ring band, a little less than a quarter inch thick in length, and on the inside was engraved. Edward looked at it and saw the message inside.

_Until the end of forever _

_Love, your Bella_

It had the message on one side, and _Love, your Bella_, on the other side. Edward tried it on each finger, and settled with putting it on his middle finger on his right hand; where it fit perfectly much to my liking. I didn't know his ring size, so I had to guess and hope for the best.

" I love this."

" You don't think it's weird? You can tell me."

" Bella, this is perfect. I really do love it. Thank you so much, beautiful."

I leaned forward and pressed my lips softly to his.

" This is perfect."

I slipped out of bed and reached out to touch one of the bouquets of roses. Leaning down, I breathed in the sweet flower scent and closed my eyes as it filled my senses. I knew that my entire room would smell like flowers for weeks, but I wasn't going to argue.

" Sexy shorts." Edward growled from the bed.

I wiggled my ass teasingly at him and smiled.

" Do you have school tonight?" I asked

I sat on the corner of the mattress, " I have a three to six class." He replied

" Ugh, and I have six thirty to nine thirty."

" Fuck."

" We can go out this weekend, baby. It's okay." I told him.

I grabbed the bottle of water on my bedside and took a sip.

" So, I'm actually not the only girl with a piercing in my classes, one girl has one in her nose and two cheek piercings and a Monroe, and her eyebrow. It got me thinking a little."

He smiled, quirking his eyebrow at me" Oh, yeah?"

I nodded, shifting my body to face him, " I might want to get a second lip piercing, next to the one I have; like you."

Edward wrapped his arm around my waist, " Do what you want, babe."

" Or I could get something else pierced..." I trailed off suggestively.

He smirked, " Oh, yeah."

I pushed on his shoulders, " I would if you'd do it with me."

His face contorted in pain," Fuck no."

" Why not?"

" I'm not piercing my...ugh, fuck. I can't even say it."

I leaned down to kiss him and he hooked his fingers into the waistband of my shorts and pulled on it.

" I can't wait until I get an apartment for next year. Then you can come over all the time and it'll just be us."

He smirked as I leaned forward, pressing my lips softly to his," Oh, yeah?"

" Mhm."

He pushed my shorts down and pulled me down onto my bed, kissing my neck hungrily and giving me no time for reaction.

" Edward! Not here, and not now. It's...eleven fifteen! Makenna gets out of her glass at eleven ten and she always comes back here afterwards."

A wicked smile spread over his face, " I can be quiet if you can."

" Edward..."

He groaned in annoyance and I scowled at him and pushed my shorts up.

" Nice panties."

They were just a pair of white cotton underwear with red and black lady bugs on them, not very sexy at all. Cute, but not sexy.

" I'm sorry I can't wear lace and thongs all the time."

" Hey, I happen to think that lady bugs are cute. Especially on you."

I blushed and Edward kissed my forehead.

" My sweet girl..." he murmured softly.

I leaned up and kissed him softly, my lips moving with his. He tangled his hand in my hair and used his other hand to pull my comforter around us. I put my arms around him and leaned against him fully. The way his hands moved over me made my body tingle all over, and I was lost in the feeling. The warmth of his hands heated me, warming me everywhere he touched.

I moved my hand over the curve of his delicious ass and he groaned into my mouth, flicking his tongue over my lip ring and tugging it with his teeth.

" BELLA! I BROUGHT DONUTS FROM THE DINING HALL! CHOCOLATE LONG JOHN CALLING YOUR NAME!" I heard Makenna suddenly yell.

Edward pulled away from me and lifted me up off the bed. I squealed and he opened up the bedroom door, slipping out of the room with me in his arms. He set me down on my feet and stepped into the kitchen, where Makenna was sipping her usual herbal tea.

" Oh, you're here." she said, looking at Edward. " Gosh, it smells like flowers in here, can you smell it, Bella?"

I grabbed my donut as Edward used my mug to pour himself some coffee.

" Yeah, actually, Edward basically covered every surface of my room with them. It smells like a fucking flower shop in my room."

A sour look threatened to cross her face, but she replaced with a sugary sweet smile.

" Edward Masen, a romantic? I would've never guessed." she teased.

I took a large bite from my chocolate donut, and taking me by surprise, Edward came up behind me and leaned over to steal a bite himself, kissing my cheek after.

" Hey, this is mine. Find your own donut. I need my morning chocolate fix."

" If I remember correctly, there is an entire box of chocolates just for you in your bedroom. Don't be fucking selfish." He said with a chuckle.

Makenna left the room and I wrapped my arm around his waist, " Yes, and thank you for those. I'll definitely take advantage of that. Here, eat the rest; I'm going to get in the shower." I told him, handing him the rest of my donut; which he happily took.

After a nice hot shower, I dressed in a pair of skinny jeans, a cream colored, loose fitting button up shirt; and a pair of dark red heels. I slipped the bracelet that Edward had gotten me for Prom on my wrist, along with the necklace for my Birthday and my favorite earrings. I fluffed my hair out with the blow drier before adding some product and loosely curling it.

After doing the rest of my routine, I did my makeup and stepped out of the bathroom and into my bedroom. There, Edward was leafing through my books, holding a familiar ring in his hand that I had been looking for previously. When he heard me enter, he turned towards me and held out my promise ring.

A twinkle shined in his eye, " Forget something?"

" Never."

He slipped it onto my finger and stepped back to appraise my outfit.

" Absolutely beautiful as always."

I grabbed my thin red scarf and tied it around my neck loosely, going over to my desk to organize some of my school books and getting my bag ready for later. Just as I had set my bag down on my bed, Edward wrapped his arms around me and turned me around in his arms.

" I'm taking you out to lunch." he informed me, kissing the tip of my nose.

" Really?"

" Yes. Now let's go." He said before whisking me off, barely giving me enough time to grab my bag.

~\\~

Edward ended up taking me to The Palm, which looked to have delicious food and it was a very nice restaurant. The service was good, and the food was even better. Edward got a Grilled Chicken Sandwich, and I got the Sesame Seared Ahi Tuna Salad. The food wasn't very much overpriced, which was a bonus for me.

" This is delicious."

" Try this."

I put piled up the fork and Edward leaned forward to taste it. I watched as his lips wrapped around the utensil, and he smiled as he pulled away; full well knowing that I was looking at him closely.

" Wow, that's really good. Here, try this."

He cut off a piece of his sandwich and gave it to me to try. I put the bite sized amount in my mouth and let out a quiet noise.

" That's really good, like, really fucking good."

Edward laughed and ate a French fry from his plate. I reached over and stole one and he grasped my hand in his, braiding my fingers through his and bringing it up to his mouth to kiss the back of my hand.

" I love you, and your dirty mouth."

I smirked, " You, too, and your mouth."

He laughed at me quietly and shook his head, a beautiful smiling gracing his face as he did.

" You're something else, Bella, something else."

" Yeah, but you love me." I said, popping a tomato into my mouth with a smile.

We took our time with lunch before Edward had to get ready to head to class. I dropped him off at his dorm, wishing that we had the day off to spend Valentine's Day together; but we'd have other days together and many more to come.

And knowing that was enough.

~\\~

BPOV

March

~\\~

Living with Makenna was weird at first, but that was nothing compared to how things were now. She avoided me at all costs, barely said a word to me and whenever Edward was here; she left or was in her bedroom. I guess I didn't expect her to take that I said to extremes, but it was kind of ridiculous when she started ignoring me.

I brushed it off and ignored it the best I could, what was I going to say to her anyways? I focused myself on school and work instead, which was better anyways. She was a fucking nuisance anyways.

The seventeenth through the twenty first I would have Spring break coming up. Including the weekend before and after those days, and Edward's was starting on the eighteenth until the twenty sixth. We would basically have the entire week together to do whatever we wanted, and I was looking forward to spending that time with him. Despite being just a few minutes away from him, we still had educational obligations, so we weren't always together.

After work I decided to give it a shot and surprise Edward at his dorm. If Wayne was working tonight, I knew he'd let me in. When I parked my car and walked to the building, I held the coffee tray in my hand securely as I shut the door.

It was getting a little warmer outside, but it was raining and thundering a bit and I wasn't appreciative of that. I hated Forks for the constant cover of clouds and rain; I couldn't wait to see what it would be like in May. I wasn't exactly sure what I was going to be doing for the summer, I could be sleeping in a fucking ditch for all I know; but I was sure Edward was going back home. And I knew I couldn't unless I stayed with James. I also had to take into consideration that I have an obligation for a job here, and I knew that it wouldn't be right to give that up.

I hadn't even talked to James in a few weeks, but Edward told me last week that he had gotten an apartment of his own now because his parents kicked him out. Apparently they had enough of the parties and the drinking. I tried calling him, but Edward said he's been really busy getting his shit together, on top of his classes in Port Angeles, where his apartment is located. I felt bad that his parents kicked him out, but apparently it's done him good and taught him a lesson, or at least that's what I've heard. Hopefully I'd hear soon from him; I missed my friend.

When I walked up to the door, I saw Wayne in uniform standing there, staring at his phone intently. He's about mid sixties, a little scraggly looking, but he's always working at night, which is usually when Edward and I hang around here, or when I drop him off. We've stopped and chatted a few times with him, and he's really nice.

" Hey, Wayne." I said as I walked up to him.

His eyes found mine and he smiled, " Hello there, Miss. Isabella."

" I brought you some coffee, happen to fancy some?"

" I know exactly what you want, kid. And he isn't here right now. He stepped out and said he was going to the Julliard building to use the practice rooms."

I nodded, " Okay, cool. Enjoy your coffee." I said, handing the cup to him. I definitely wasn't going to drink it, and he could have it either way.

He chuckled at me as I headed down towards the main building. It was a little bit of a walk, but once I made it there and jogged up the stairs to head in, I knew exactly which practice room I'd find him in. After making my way around, I walked down the hall and found room twenty. The moment I opened the door, I could hear the room filled with his beautiful music, unlike any other I've heard before.

I knew he couldn't hear me; his head was turned slightly down, bronze hair falling in his face as he focused on the keys. There was sheet music in front of him, that his eyes would briefly flicker to, and his music never faltered as he shifted his eyes up and down. Slowly and carefully, I stepped behind him and rested my hands on his tense shoulders. He relaxed upon feeling my touch, never faltering, and still didn't stop playing until he hit that last, perfect note.

When he finished I sat next to him on the bench and handed him the coffee I had brought for him especially. My job had its perks, but I definitely consumed more fucking coffee than I needed.

" That was beautiful."

" There is a spring recital coming up."

" Really? Why didn't you tell me?"

He shrugged, " You have other things going on."

" I want to be there, Edward. Just like I know if it was the other way around you'd want to be there for me."

Edward didn't say anything, he just sipped his coffee.

" Is it because you're nervous?"

He laughed nervously, " No, I'm not nervous."

I smiled, " You can't fool me. Do you want me to go so you can practice?"

" No, I have plenty of time for practicing. I can't wait until Spring Break is here."

" Why is that?"

" I just can't wait to spend some fucking time with you with no school involved."

I leaned against his shoulder, " Me either."

He lifted me up with him and opened the door to the practice room, grabbing his bag from the floor.

" Let's go somewhere." was all he said, grabbing my hand and leading me out.

We walked on and on until we came to the Lincoln Center. It was dark outside, and the fountain and tall, high buildings with the floor to ceiling windows with lights inside lit up the place. It was beautiful. There were a few people on benches, others sitting at tables, and a few people walking around aimlessly.

I wrapped my arm around his waist as he leaned against the railing that was wrapped around the large fountain. I could hear the splashing of the water as it fell, and it was soothing in a way. He held me tightly to his side, leaning down to kiss the side of my head.

" How was class today?"

" Good. You?"

" Hectic, but I love it."

" Good."

He glanced down at me, " Do you think things would be different if you went to Columbia?"

I sighed, " I'm not sure. But we probably wouldn't see each other as often. I wouldn't be able to drive over here at seven PM. We'd probably just spend weekends together, which isn't bad...But I like surprising you, and I like when you show up at my work."

" I miss you when I don't see you for a day, I don't think I could do five days."

I shrugged, " We've done it before."

" That's because we didn't have a choice."

I shook my head and squeezed his hand, " There's always a choice, Edward."

" Do you blame me for coming here and not waiting for you?"

My eyes widened, " No! Edward, why would you think that?"

He shrugged, " I don't know."

" We're together now, are we not?"

" It's different now." The way he said it sparked something inside of me, and questions flooded by mine but I knew that I'd only settle for one.

I stood centered in front of him and slipped my arms around his waist under his open jacket. He put his arms around my neck and held me closely to him, allowing me to breathe in his enticing scent that was pure him.

" What do you mean?"

" I don't know. _We _are different."

" It's not always going to be summer, you know? It won't always be making out in the pool and running around fucking crazy wherever we want. We grow up, and act like adults and in turn become adults. I mean, when I was back home I always told myself I was always on my own and did everything for myself and I was an adult...Then…Damn, I moved here out on my own and actually had to be one, for real. It's hard, but... I want to be here with you, and I am enjoying school and working...Do you not feel the same?"

" No, not at all. I love school, and I love you being here anymore."

" Then what did you mean about us being different?" I asked, very confused at what he was trying to say.

He kissed my forehead, " It's nothing."

Edward dropped his bag and took me in his arms, spinning me around before bringing me back into his arms. I laughed and put my arms around his neck as he held onto my hips, moving us from side to side.

" There's no music." I pointed out.

" We don't need any." he said, twirling me around before pulling me quickly into his arms with my back against his chest, moving us from side to side in a gentle swaying motion.

I let him twirl me around and dance with him until he was tired and only just holding me in his arms. We stayed there for a little while before we walked back to his dorm together and I headed back to my own. He whispered his sweet nothings into my ear before leaving, kissing my neck softly as he slipped through the door.

When I got back and headed up to the room, I saw Makenna in the living room with her laptop sitting on her lap and her phone next to her with the television on, as usual. I grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge and went into my room. I picked up one of Edward's t-shirts that I had taken, and a hoodie that he left here. Then again, he leaves most of his clothes hanging around besides his boxers whenever he's here.

I took off everything and put on his shirt, which came down mid-thigh. After a quick toss of my long hair in a ponytail, I grabbed my book bag and got started on homework that I needed to finish up and complete.

Once I finished with my homework at around eleven, I went into the kitchen for a snack before heading to bed. I shifted in bed for awhile, trying to get comfortable but never finding a way to settle down and be content. In the morning after a long fitful night of sleep, I bundled up and headed to class as I usually did. But as I went about my day I still couldn't get what Edward said out of my mind.

What did he mean about us being different?

And was it good or bad?

~\\~

The entire week I was bothered by Edward's words, but I didn't bother saying anything to him. We'd only really talked on the phone this week because I was working a fair amount, and when I wasn't working I was in class or studying and doing homework. Usually he'd surprise me by popping over every once in awhile, but he hadn't. We talked through text at night, but my mind was still wandering.

I had no idea if I should drop what he said, or if I should ask him about it. But at the same time I didn't want him to feel like I was making something out of nothing. He didn't seem to be acting weird over the phone though.

Maybe I was paranoid.

Or maybe I wasn't being completely illogical.

After an afternoon class I found myself sitting in a cafe on campus, drinking coffee and reading a book between classes since I had nothing else to do, but I still couldn't focus on my book because my mind kept wandering to Edward.

I knew eventually I had to say something to him.

~\\~

" Are you sure you aren't making something out of nothing?"

I sighed, " No, idea...But it's driving me insane!"

Jess laughed, " Bella, Edward loves you. Anybody with two working eyes can see that. Hell, a blind person can. Just talk to him instead of making yourself sick over it."

She was right.

Fuck.

" Yeah... I don't know...I guess that after everything I was kind of wary to just question him about things."

" Bella, how are you guys going to work if you aren't open about things?"

" I hate you for being so right."

" Love you, too. Now call your man."

~\\~ 

" Are we going to be enemies for, like, ever?" Makenna suddenly asked me.

I glanced at her over my laptop and quirked an eyebrow at her, she smacked her gum and looked down at her phone as she clicked away on it. I didn't know what I wanted more, that phone to break or for that gum to choke her.

" You aren't my enemy Makenna." I stated.

She cocked her head to the side, " Then why do you ignore me? And Edward avoids me like the plague."

Says the girl who runs away from him.

" You came on to my boyfriend, and then had the audacity to blame him for it. Excuse me for not being your best friend."

A dramatic sigh filled the hair, and I had to hold back an eye roll at her antics. I wasn't going to just jump around shit; I was going to be straight up with honesty. She was wrong in what she did, and fuck it if she thought I wasn't going to make her aware of that.

I set my laptop down and crossed my legs, " Look, Makenna, believe it or not; I get it. I understand that you feel fucking stupid for giving up Edward, and years later he comes back around and you want a second shot at him. You're a girl, of course you feel that way. I also understand that you are really goddamn jealous, even though you won't admit it, and that it sucks because he hangs around because he's with me. But, fuck, out of girl code or some shit, can you please just back off? I don't care if you hang around us if we are in here, you don't have to run into your room; but if that floats your fucking boat then go for it. I don't give a shit. I just don't want to see you flirting or touching my boyfriend in anyway; is that clear?"

" Yeah, whatever. I get it."

" Glad we cleared that up." I said simply.

She leaned back in the chair, " So, are we going to make this work?"

I glanced up at her, nodding slowly, " Yeah."

~\\~

I paced as my fingers tugged at my hair. I caught my lip between my teeth and worried it for a moment before pausing mid-step and sitting down at my desk chair.

" You're driving me insane. What's wrong?"

" I wasn't going to say anything, I mean, I thought it was nothing. But then I thought about it. A lot. And then it started driving ME insane. And I couldn't think straight and I was going crazy. Then I called Jess yesterday and she told me that I needed to just ask you, because we won't work out if we don't talk to each other. That's what happened last time. And I love you. So I'm asking anyways. Because I love you. But I don't want you to think I am making something out of nothing, because I ju-"

He put his finger to my lips, " Talk to me."

" What did you mean when you said we weren't the same."

The words spilled out, and the second I finished; Edward was laughing.

That motherfucker was laughing after how insane I've been going after hearing him say it.

" Goddamn, Bella. I didn't mean it in a bad way. I mean like...We're older. It feels like we both became adults while we were apart. Are relationship feels more mature."

I slapped his shoulder, " I fucking hate you! I have been going insane!"

Edward pulled me out of the chair and positioned me to straddle his lap on the edge of my bed, bringing my legs around him.

His fingers ran through my hair and he leaned forward to kiss me. I wrapped my arms around his neck and teased his tongue with mine for a moment before leaning back and shaking my head.

" God, I was freaking out about it all week."

Both hands moved down to curl around my hips, pulling me closer.

" You are such a silly girl."

I pushed him down on the mattress, " I'll show you silly." I mocked,

" You are completely ridiculous, and I love you anyways."

My forehead rested against his, " I love you, too. Now promise me never to say shit like that again without explanation."

He smiled at me and leaned forward for a gentle kiss.

" Of course, love."

~\\~

_Bang_

_Bang_

_Bang_

I groaned when I heard yet another scream/squeal emitting from across the hall. Beside me I felt Edward shift from the startling noise, and his arm tightened around me protectively in his subconscious state. Another thumping noise made me groan quietly in annoyance, and Edward pushed his leg between mine as his nose brushed against my neck.

_Thump_

_Moan_

" What's going on?" a gritty voice mumbled beside me.

I pulled the blanket up to my chin and closed my eyes, " Makenna and her nightly sexual endeavors."

" Fuck."

" Maybe we should show them how much better we are at it."

Edward chuckled with a raspy voice, " Oh, really?"

" Yeah, I really think so." I murmured as I wrapped my leg around his and pressed myself close to him.

_Bang_

_Bang_

" God I hope that bed breaks." I whined.

Two arms pulled me back until I was laying on top of Edward with my head underneath his chin.

Three hours, many thumps, moans and groans and it was finally quiet. It was six in the morning, with no hope of going back to sleep, so I left Edward passed out in bed while I drowned myself in coffee. An hour after that, a man, a very naked man, stumbled down the hallway and past the kitchen, picking up clothes as he went.

I shook my head as I saw him bend over, naked and extremely disgusting hairy ass right in front of me as I groaned quietly to myself. As he saw me shake my head at him, I saw him wink in my direction and smile a Cheshire cat grin. I immediately grabbed my cup of coffee and scampered back to my room as Makenna stepped out of her room wearing a hot pink bed sheet, looking proud of herself for some reason. God, I had no idea what she had to be proud of because that kid out there didn't look like a prince to me.

Edward was up when I shut my door, and I shivered and set my cup down on my end table.

" I just saw a very white, hairy ass in my living room."

He groaned and laid back, " I cannot wait until we get our own apartment together."

Edward wrapped his arms around me and rolled me underneath him, kissing my lips.

I couldn't wait either.

**Authors Note- Reasons why this is especially late. *****READ ALL NOTES BELOW******

**1.) I've been extremely busy lately, and don't always get to the computer every day.**

**2.) Fanfiction has been failing since Friday and I recently just got back into my account.**

**So, yes, I was extremely busy, but FF wasn't working and I couldn't even login for some odd reason. Lately, there have been a lot of things going on in my life that are really keeping me busy; and it's definitely been putting Fan fiction on the bottom of my list of To Do's. I'm really sorry for that, but things change; as does my schedule.**

**Teasers didn't go out because fan fiction wasn't working. By the time I was able to access Fanfiction it wasn't even worth sending them out because I was going to update the next day anyways.**

**Another thing is, I don't have the next chapter finished already, so I have to set aside time to figure out how to write it all out. Things have been very busy, but I am NOT going to abandon this story, so please do not worry. The reviews are giving me inspiration, keep them coming!**


	29. Lullaby

**Authors Note- I know….Just read on.**

**Disclaimer- S. Meyer owns all things Twilight.**

**Chapter Song: Lullaby by: Sia**

~\\~

BPOV

April

~\\~

" So, what are you planning on doing in the summer, you know, for living arrangements?" Edward asked as I stabbed my salad with a fork.

" I'll probably go to Florida with my mom. I haven't figured it out yet. But I have nowhere to stay in Forks, unless James lets me crash at his place in Port Angeles. Fuck, I haven't even thought about it really."

He nodded, leaning back against the booth as he took a long pull of his drink.

I shrugged," Maybe I'll stay same building I was in before; it's possible I can make a deal with the tenant about summers. I don't know."

Edward twirled his straw in his cup, his brow furrowed deeply. " What if we get an apartment together out here?"

" Do you really think that's a good idea?"

I could see that he was struggling internally with himself, " Bella, I know my limits when it comes to you, and I know I can't go an entire fucking summer not being with you." he said lowly, setting his cup down and leaning over the table towards me.

" I'm just cautious, Edward."

" Do you not want to? I mean. Do you really want us to be apart for the summer?

My eyes widened and I looked at him, " Of course I want us together. I just don't want to fuck us up."

He let out a humorless laugh, " Bella, we get fucked up when we aren't together. Maybe you can come back to Forks with me."

" I don't know what to do yet, Edward. But I have a job here. I can't just up and quit. I take this shit seriously."

" What if you take a leave of absence for the summers? You can do that, right?"

" Where am I going to go? I can't take the summers off. I can't do that if I have rent to pay. I mean, I could spend the money in my bank account; but I can't rely on that. That's money that has been saved up for me, and money I've earned working back in Forks. If I were to go back to Forks, then I'd have to get an apartment out there for the summer. It's not as easy to do that, and I'll end up getting one in Port Angeles. Fuck, Edward, I'd do anything to be with you but I can't take this lightly."

He grabbed my chin and made me look at him, " Maybe you can stay with me. I'm going to talk to my mom. We probably can't be in the same room, but being in the same fucking house is perfectly fine with me if it is for you."

" They won't want me there, Edward." I sighed, " especially, Carlisle."

" My mom adores you, Bella. And you know it."

" What if I stay with James?" I suggested, " I've stayed with him before for a month. That was at his parents' house, but I'm sure if I offered to help with rent and food he'd been cool with it. That way I wouldn't have to worry about apartment hunting."

" You stayed with him for a month? What? When?"

" I was sixteen, it's nothing."

Edward gave me a look, " Don't fucking do that."

" I got fucked up one night and decided that it was alright to come home. My dad woke up because I was making a lot of noise, and we started yelling in the living room after he went off. He threw me into the wall, and I threw a vase at the front window trying to hit him and ended up breaking the vase and the window at like four in the morning. He called the cops on me."

Edward's mouth dropped into a frown, " Bella, how many times has he hurt you."

" Edwa-"

" Tell me." he demanded

I roughly ran my hands over my face," Three times. He hit me the day before his wedding with Sue because we got into a nasty argument. And then the drunk thing, and afterwards the night I got kicked out when he tried to...strangle me."

" Does your mom know?"

A laugh escaped me and I shook my head, " No. And don't tell her."

" Bella...He's abused you. You need to fucking do something about it."

" He's my dad. I don't want to do anything about it. I'm out of there, he can't hurt me anymore."

" Nobody will ever hurt you. Ever." he kissed my knuckles.

I smiled at him and used the back of my hand to brush against his jaw.

" I love you."

He leaned forward to kiss me chastely. " I love you, too, Angel."

" I have to get to class." I said regretfully.

" Okay...I'll call my mom soon."

" Edward..." I warned.

He stood up from the booth and tossed a few bills on the table blindly, bringing me into his arms and holding me closely to him. I wrapped my arms around his waist and rested my head against his comfortable chest. I felt him press a kiss to the top of my head and a smile spread across my face.

" I'll see you later beautiful. Have fun in class."

" Be safe."

Edward gave me a kiss on the lips before releasing me, " Always am."

I looked back at him with a smile as he walked down the sidewalk outside. Completely and utterly astounded on how much this man changed my life.

For the better.

And I wasn't sure what I was going to do in the summer. We still had a month to figure it out.

As long as we were together in some way, that's all that matters.

~\\~

Jenna set out the daisies on the counter just as I stepped into the coffee shop. There was a brand new fern plant by the side of the door, among a whole other fuck-ton of plants. I looked at Jenna and raised an eyebrow.

" Apparently this will bring in plenty more customers."

" So we match the outside by making it look like a fucking garden center in Home Depot in here?"

She shrugged, " I guess so."

I slipped on my apron, and just as I went to put my phone in the locker, it started ringing. I ignored it, knowing I could just get it later and went to clock in. Just as I finished, it went off again. With a deep sigh I went to my locker, knowing I shouldn't go to it but apparently this call was persistent.

Grabbing my phone I saw it was Edward, and I quickly put it to my ear and leaned against the locker.

" Hey, everything alright? I'm starting work right now."

" Yeah, I just wanted to know if I could take you out to dinner tonight. I'll walk to the shop before you leave."

He was breathing heavily into the phone, and I knew he must have been rushing somewhere. What did he have planned? Our one year had already passed, and I had no idea what he could possibly be up to now.

" That's fine. Why are you breathing so heavy?"

" No reason. I'll see you later. I love you."

I smiled, " Love you, too. You better not be up to anything."

The line went dead and I put my phone in the locker and shut it. When I got out to the front I saw customers lined up, and I glanced at the clock and saw that I was a few minutes past. Jenna gave me a look and I quickly started up my register and started to take costumers.

It was insanely busy the entire day at work, which was odd because it was in the middle of the week. When Jenna took her lunch break I was non-stop taking orders and making drinks, luckily another employee came in to help out. I knew the manager probably called someone on so he wouldn't have to get up here and work.

When my own lunch break came around I got the fuck out of there and went down the street to get a sandwich at the deli where I spend most of my lunch breaks. Sometimes I can even meet Edward up here when he isn't in class.

As I was heading back towards the shop, my phone went off in my pocket. I fumbled to grab it before it stopped and saw it was Leah. After talking to her last night, I wondered why she would call me.

" Hey."

" Bella, hey. Uh, something happened." I heard her quiet voice say on the other end.

I paused, " What? What happened?"

" Charlie...He's in the hospital...He got shot in the line of duty."

" Are you serious? Is he okay?"

She sighed, " We don't know. All I know is that he was shot in his stomach and he's in ICU. The nurse came out five minutes ago and said there's severe bleeding...they said to be ready for the worst, Bella."

And in that moment it didn't matter that he had hurt me in the past, or that he never cared about me. None of that seemed to register into my head, and I knew that I had to find a way to get to Forks.

" Okay...Look, I'm leaving work and I'm going to the airport right now. I'll call you. Text me if you hear anything more." I rushed out, walking quicker towards the shop as I ended the call.

I ran in to the back of the building and went to the front, looking everywhere for the manager. Demetri appeared and scared the shit out of me, making me jump back.

" What's the rush, kiddo?"

" I have to go now, there's a family emergency." I informed him.

He looked at the front of the shop, examining all of the customers, and looked back at me before sighing and nodding.

" Go."

I went to my locker and grabbed my bag and coat, shuffling to get a hold of myself as I sprinted out to my car, ignoring the chill air against my bare arms from failing to get my coat on. Once I got the car started and pulled out onto the roads, I knew I had to make a run to the dorms first, and most essentially call Edward.

My thoughts raced as I drove, my heart pounding frantically in my chest with no chance of being able to calm it.

There was a possibility that I could lose my dad, and even though we'd never got along, and even though I told everybody that I hated him and he fucked up my life; I couldn't ignore this. I'd regret it for the rest of my life if I just stayed here and didn't try and make an effort to see him.

We hadn't talked or even seen each other since that night, and I knew that to him nothing had probably changed, and if he kicked me out of the hospital room and rejected me I'd deal with it. At least I could say that I tried.

~\\~

" Your at the airport? Why? What the fuck is going on?" Edward asked.

" My dad got shot in the line of duty today, Edward. I have to go. I can't stay here, it's not right."

" I'll go with you, just wait for me." he begged.

I looked at the clock, and at my ticket. " My flight leaves in like five minutes, Edward. I'm walking to the terminal right now. I'll call you when I land. I love you, okay?"

" I love you, too. Keep me posted, okay?"

" Of course."

~\\~

It took almost five hours to get to Washington from New York, and in those almost five hours I had absolutely no fucking clue what was going on from Leah. The entire flight my mind couldn't seem to slow down and I had to stop myself before I had a goddamn panic attack.

When I turned my phone on there were five messages, one from Edward and the others from Leah. As I walked towards the front entrance to try and find a cab, I looked through all of the text messages.

_He's still in ICU. Blood transfusions_

_The doctors got the bleeding under control, but he has to go into surgery._

_Made it through, did you find a flight?_

_They moved him to recovery, he's still out cold. Text me when you land, okay? I told my mom that you were here, and she isn't so sure about how he's going to react but she's glad that you decided to come._

After fifteen minutes of trying to flag down a cab, I finally got one and sidled into the backseat, making a call to Edward after directing the driver on where to go. I knew that this ride was going to be long, and it was going to cost a fortune, but I just spent a couple hundred bucks on a plane ticket, this was going to be nothing compared to that.

Two calls later I finally got a hold of Edward, who, of course, was wondering if the flight went okay and if I was alright. I understood why he was asking so many questions, he was worried about me being here alone.

" I'm in a cab right now heading to the hospital. Leah told me that they got the bleeding under control, did transfusions and apparently he went into surgery also. I'm not sure if I'm going to be here long, but if I do I think I'll give James a call for somewhere to stay."

Edward sighed over the phone, and I knew he wasn't keen on that idea, but he didn't say anything about it.

" Alright, baby. Call me soon, okay? Let me know how everything goes."

To be perfectly honest, I had absolutely no semblance of a clue how this was going to go with my father. It was either going to be terrible, or it could come out good; but I had absolutely no idea which one. There was a big part of me that thought maybe if he saw me after this happening to him, he's come around. Another part made me believe that he really wanted nothing to do with me and I'd only make him angry being here.

I wasn't looking for a healed relationship between my father. I was here because no matter what he'll always be my dad and even if you don't get along with them, and even through they've hurt you; it doesn't change that it's your parent. No matter what you always have some kind of care for that person; even if it's denied.

While I was in the cab, I also decided to call my mom. I wasn't sure if she knew or not, I figured not. When I told her she was completely shocked, and of course asked a million questions that I couldn't even answer at the time. She was concerned; concerned to the point where she considered flying out, too, but her and I both knew that it probably wouldn't be the best at the time with me there. Whenever both my mother and I around my father is always more tense; it's always been that way since I could remember after they got divorced.

When finally the long cab ride was over, I was standing in the rain right in front of Forks Hospital.

The last time I'd been here was after Edward's lung collapsed.

I paused outside of the Emergency Room automatic doors. A man to my right glancing at me as he smoked his cigarette. I decided to take a seat myself and smoke one before going inside. I took my time before knowing that I had to face the music. I stepped through the automatic doors and shakily walked over to the receptionist desk and took in a shaky breath.

" Hi, I'm looking for Charles Swan? He was admitted here sometime this morning I believe."

Recognition passed over the girls face and she typed something on her computer.

" Yes, he is in recovery after surgery. I can have our nurse Kelsey here show you to the waiting room."

A petite blonde nurse walked up to me with a bright smile on her face, asking me to follow her and started turning down halls. It was easy. I didn't understand why the fuck they didn't just tell where to go. Left, right, left, left, right. And there was the family recovery waiting room.

Sitting in the chairs I saw Sue, who looked like a complete and total wreck. Her eyes were bloodshot from tears, and her clothes hung loosely off of her from nervous pulling. Jake and Seth were there, probably have been pulled out of school. Seth was doodling in his notebook randomly with a solemn look on his face, and Jake was sitting there with a bored expression on his face, looking uncomfortable. Leah was tapping her leg nervously, tugging the ends of her hair and tapping on her phone with a free-hand.

When I walked in, they all suddenly looked up at the same time, and immediately Leah jumped out of her seat and basically ran to me; her arms wrapping tightly around me. I almost fell over from the force of her embrace, but held myself upright.

" You're here!"

" Yeah, I'm here. How is he?"

" Still in recovery, we haven't heard anything yet." Leah said, pulling away.

Sue stood up and stepped towards me, a watery smile coming over her face.

" Bella, I'm so glad you are here." she said, holding back tears.

I was surprised to say in the least. Sue had never said but two words to me ever, whenever she did talk to me, it was when my father and I were in the middle of a fight. She never showed that she cared about me, yet she never said that she didn't care. Indifferent.

" Uh, yeah..." I said awkwardly.

" What are you wearing?" Leah whispered.

I looked down at my clothes, not really realizing what I had put on when I got to my apartment. I changed out of my clothes after I left work and grabbed the first things I saw. Apparently that was a pair of ripped up skinny jeans, a white crop top with black lettering, and a dark grey zip up hoodie that belonged to Edward and hung open on both sides. I also couldn't forget my silver sparkly heels I'd actually worn to work.

" I have no fucking clue." I replied, sitting down in a vinyl chair that was uncomfortable as hell.

My hair was at my waist now and hanging down in brown, ratty curls. I grabbed a ponytail from my wrist and tied it up at the nape of my neck, pushing my bangs out of my face and nervously biting my lip.

The time ticked by, the hands on the clock going so much slower than I thought possible. I texted Edward through most of it, he was the only thing keeping me sane. Being in Forks was already stressing me out, and technically nothing had really happen yet.

About an hour after I arrived at the hospital, a doctor had finally come through the doors and stood in the room. Everybody sat up taller with hopefully looks on their faces, but I knew that Sue was probably getting ready to crumble. She'd already lost her first husband; I couldn't imagine what it would be like to lose a second.

" Are you the family of Charles Swan?"

" Yes, we are." Sue answered immediately.

He smiled, " We'll as you know the surgery went well. We were able to extract the bullet and sew up the wound. He isn't bleeding anymore, we were able to get that under control; and the nurses just woke him up. I'm sure you would all like to see him, but you have to be quiet when you walk in. Would you like to follow me?"

Immediately the boys sprung up and I heaved up from my chair, following behind everybody with my heart beating out of my chest. I felt like I was going to throw up all over the place. I didn't want to see him, but I had to. I didn't want to see that same look in his eyes when he looked at me. I promised myself I'd never let him get me down; but he already was.

I bit my lip, staring at the floor as I walked. The doctor stopped outside of a room and opened the door. As they all walked in, I heard Sue let out a quiet sob before saying his name.

I couldn't do it.

I sat outside of the door and leaned against the wall, slowly sliding down to the floor with my head between my knees.

This wasn't as easy as I thought. It wasn't easy to just walk into a room and look at the person who almost died, knowing that he hates you; that he doesn't want anything to do with any part of you. Yet on the inside it's the right thing to walk in there and look past it all, to forget everything.

But I couldn't forget.

I couldn't forget that this was the same man that's raised a hand to me, the same man who has called me awful names, and the same man that wrapped his hands around my neck and attempted choke me. A part of me believed that if it weren't for James that I would have been dead on the floor that night.

" Bella?" A familiar voice called out.

I looked up and walking down the call I saw Carlisle Cullen. I probably looked pathetic, sitting on the linoleum floor with mascara streaming down my face. Wiping my face with my hands, I looked at him. There was a kind look in his eyes, something I'd never seen before. It was compassion and care.

What I needed most right now.

Fuck.

" I heard your father was in the ICU this afternoon, and Edward just called me and asked me to keep an eye on you."

Edward called Carlisle.

It was no secret that Edward and Carlisle didn't have a good relationship. They never saw eye to eye on anything, and didn't care for each other at all. Edward was resentful of the fact that his parents got divorced and his mother re-married, and the fact that he called Carlisle just to make sure I was alright said a lot to me. It showed me that Edward loved me even more.

" He called you?"

" Surprising, right? I can't ever remember a time he's ever called me for anything. I guess I can't blame him."

I nodded.

" Why are you sitting out here alone?"

" I don't know." I answered honestly.

Then he did something that took me completely off guard, he sat down and leaned against the wall next to me. I wrapped my arms around myself and took a deep breath.

" I can only imagine how hard it is for you to walk in there." he noted, " I do know about your relationship with your father."

I glanced over at him, " Edward told you?"

" Edward told Esme. Don't be upset at him, though, I think we've all understood that Esme and Edward have a very close bond. Not even I can understand it all the time."

" Yeah." I whispered, " They do."

" You can go back to New York, Bella. But I can tell you that one day when your father is gone; it's going to be the biggest mistake you've ever made. I'm sure that you understand that."

I tensed up, " I do."

" Believe it or not I understand how you feel right now. When I grew up my father and I never got along, we actually had a similar relationship that I have with Edward unfortunately. We never saw eye to eye, never could agree on anything whether it be what college I attended or how to clean a dish. If things were never done in his way, he was never satisfied. I was always able to handle it, until it got very awful. He was the most unbearable my last year of high school, expecting perfection out of me. If I came home with anything less than an 'A' on an assignment he would become livid. He drove me right out of that house, he honestly did. The day I graduated was the best day of my life."

I listened intently to his story, waiting for what he was getting at, but I was surprised that he was even sitting next to me telling me this story. That was more than I'd ever expect out of him.

"Once I went to college out of state, I never went back home. I would spend Christmas and Thanksgiving home, but otherwise I was on my own. My mother hated that we never got along, and she never understood why we never could put our differences aside even on a holiday or a birthday. I blamed him for it most of the time," he paused for a moment, " He died of pancreatic cancer my second year in school, Bella. He'd been sick since my last year of high school and my parents never even told me."

My eyes widened, " They never told you?"

" Never. He pushed me so hard that last year because he wanted me to get into the school I wanted. He pushed the idea of going to school in Chicago so I'd want to go to Harvard even more. Bella, he didn't want me to watch him die, he pushed me so hard so I'd leave the state."

When I looked up at Carlisle, I could see the unshed tears in his eyes.

" I know that you don't get along with your father, Bella. But even if he kicks you out of that room, even if he pushes you away; be there. Show him that you do care even if he doesn't want you to. Because I'd never want someone to live with the regrets I did."

" It wasn't your fault, Carlisle." I whispered, " They didn't tell you. You can't blame yourself for that."

He shook his head, " Not anymore. I blamed my mother for awhile, but then I realized that If I lost her like I lost him that I'd never be able to live with myself. But what is most important right now is you going in there, even if it's for five minutes."

Carlisle stood up and reached for my hand. Reluctantly, I put my hand in it and he helped me up. I looked at the door to the room and looked back at him.

" Thank you...I...I needed that."

He smiled warmly, " Of course. If you need anything, just let me know."

I nodded and watched as he turned and walked away. I took in a deep breath and reminding myself of everything Carlisle told me, I hesitantly opened the door and stepped into the room.

Sue sat in a chair closest to the bed, holding my father's frail looking hand. He looked so weak laying there hooked up to an IV and an oxygen tube under his nose. His skin was pale, and his dark hair was in a disarray. It wasn't gelled in that perfect style he'd done every day since I could remember.

To him, I probably looked no different, especially in this clothing choice.

His eyes were barely open, but he was lucid enough to notice when the door in the room shut. When his light brown eyes finally took in my presence, an unexplained pained look came across his face and tears welled up in his eyes.

" Hey, dad." I tried to say nonchalantly, my voice cracking at the word 'dad'.

I could clearly hear his heart monitor quickening, and Sue quietly whispered to him. I stepped further into the room and saw his eyes close for a moment; he swallowed and opened his eyes once more.

" No." he whispered, shaking his head back and forth as he looked at me, and then at Sue with eyes that were almost frantic, " I don't want...I don't want her here. No."

Inside, a part of me broke down, but I swallowed the lump in my throat and stood up tall.

" I'm here because I wanted to make sure you were okay." I told him, " We don't get along but your health is more important than our differences."

" We'll give you guys a moment to talk. Come on guys." Leah said, shuffling the boys out and shutting the door behind her.

Sue stood by his bedside, not saying a word.

All of these years I looked at this as her staying out of it, but looking at this; it was her being submissive to my father. To everything that he wanted.

" I don't want you here." my father struggled out. " I don't want to look at you, or hear about you."

_Don't falter, Bella. Don't falter._

" Well, unfortunately, I give a shit about what happens to you even if you don't give a shit about what happens to me. Let's be honest, I don't want to be here. Last time I saw you, you tried to choke me. I wasn't bouncing in my seat on the plane, and I almost didn't walk into this room. But I did it for you, can you at least acknowledge that?"

" You were a mistake. I don't want you here. Nobody wants you here." he said sharply. " There's a reason I treated you the way that I did, Isabella. When I was finished with your mother; I was finished with you. I think it's about time that you realize that."

Even laying weak in a hospital bed his words still shook me to my core. Still made the little girl who's looking for acceptance inside of me want to crumble to the floor.

I took in a shaky breath, " Goodbye, Charlie. I wish you the best in getting better."

I walked out of the room, brushing past Leah and ignoring her saying my name after me. I couldn't pretend anymore that I could be apart of the family, this included talking to Leah. I didn't want to sever my relationship with her, but no relationship with my father and his new family would ever last. A part of me wanted to just run down that hallway in tears, but I kept a quick stride instead and found myself in the front of the hospital.

My hand fumbled in my pocket for my phone and I dialed Edward's number, one hand on my chest to stop the heaving.

" Hey, baby, everything okay?

" I wasn't going to walk in there, Edward...I wasn't going to but then Carlisle, and he...My father said...I can't..."

" Go find Carlisle, sweetheart. Look, I'm going to the airport right now to come get you."

I shook my head, " No, you have class tomorrow."

" It's Friday, not a big deal if I miss one day. Go find Carlisle, let him take you home."

" Home?"

" Yes. You can stay in my room, and let Esme take care of you until I get there."

" Nobody needs to take care of me."

He sighed, " Stop being so goddamn stubborn and go. I love you."

" Love you, too."

~\\~

I did find Carlisle, and he ended up driving us to Edward's house. When we got there, I realized how awkward it felt without Edward being here with me. I knew Edward must have called Esme, because the moment I walked through the door she had me in her arms and she was rubbing my back softly and ushering me into the kitchen.

" I've made tea, come with me, sweetheart."

" Esme, can I please go upstairs. I can't...not right now." I whispered, already overwhelmed at how quickly this was happening.

She nodded sadly at me, " Of course. But take this with you anyways, okay?"

I took the warm mug from her and thanked her before walking upstairs and heading into Edward's room. It was missing a lot of his essence, the small things that made it his room; but he still had the same bed spread and some of his music, his television and other things here. I took a sip of the tea and set it down, setting my bag on the floor and my jacket on his lounger.

So many words floated around my head, and I tried to push my father's words back, but they kept re-appearing. I went into the bathroom and filled up the bathtub with water, pouring the bubble bath soap on the ledge into it. I stripped off all of my clothes and sunk into the bathtub, letting out a long sigh.

I wished Edward was here with me, because I knew that him being here would make everything better. I closed my eyes and relaxed, still trying to block out all of the words; but it wasn't long until the tears streamed down my face with no stop to it.

Hearing him tell me I was a mistake...

I wrapped my arms around my legs and let the tears fall.

They never stopped until the moment I fell asleep.

**Authors Note- I know it's been two weeks since I've updated.**

**Honestly, for awhile I had completely lost my writing mojo. I had awful writers block and I was very lost, until I started getting idea's, and well, here they are. I am trying to take time to write, but life really has been getting in the way, and I just recently got over an awful case of Laryngitis, which is primarily the reason that this chapter is late. I'm very sorry, but all your reviews are amazing, thank you all to those who are reviewing and being encouraging, those are the things that are giving me the push to write!**

**I am working on the next chapter, and I will most definitely REPLY to all REVIEWS, and try to get TEASERS out for you guys. I want to get back to the normal schedule!**


	30. God Gave Me You

**Authors Note- LONG explanation at the end note if you guys need it, okay? Read on!**

**Disclaimer- S. Meyer owns all things Twilight.**

**Chapter Song: God Gave Me You by: Blake Shelton**

~\\~

BPOV

~\\~

It was around six thirty in the morning when I awoke. My phone was blinking a red light, signaling text messages. I reached for my phone and saw that they were full of texts from Edward. Rubbing my eyes, I leaned up and opened up the messages.

Upon reading them, I sighed. There were no flights out here as of today, and apparently none for me to go back home until Sunday. Instead of texting him back, his last text from three in the morning, I called him. Not only needing to talk to him about this, but to also hear his voice.

_" You've reached Edward Masen, I can't get to my phone right now but leave your name, number and a detailed message and I'll get back to you as soon as I can." - Beep._

" Hey, I...I got your texts. It's okay. I'm thinking about calling James and staying with him until I leave, being here is weird without you. I love you."

After hanging up the phone, I called James. He was just getting up this morning, and I was glad to have caught him. Apparently Edward told him last night about my dad, and knew exactly why I was calling. Fuck, I couldn't have been luckier to have a friend like James.

" You okay? Edward told me you were pretty fucking upset?"

" Yeah, just come get me? Please? I don't want to be here like this..."

" Already on my way." he said before hanging up the phone.

I grabbed the rest of my clothing off of Edward's lounger and put the rest of my clothes on. Before heading downstairs, I checked Edward's drawers and found a few t-shirts, lounge pants and jeans. I grabbed a pair of his lounge pants and two of his shirts with me. When I spotted a pair of his skinny jeans left behind, I quirked an eyebrow and looked down at my now baggy pants that I had slept in…

~\\~

" Are you wearing guy pants? Because right now your ass looks like it's sagging to the floor." James said as he grabbed onto me and pulled me into his arms.

I breathed in his familiar sandalwood scent, and it was a warm, comforting feeling to be embraced by a friend right now. Someone I knew I could trust and turn to with anything. And if it wasn't Edward I'd need James.

" I'm sorry about your dad, Bella." he said, " But fuck him for treating you like shit."

I cracked a small smile, " Yeah. Fuck him."

James and I got into his car and headed towards Port Angeles to where his apartment was located. We talked, a lot. Since I've been in New York, we've barely talked at all; and I usually just bought the excuse Edward used that James has been busy. In the back of my mind I always knew that it couldn't just be that, because every time I asked Edward he seemed even closer to telling me why James hadn't tried to contact me and talk. I could tell by looking at him that there was more to it.

But even though he expressed feelings to me of liking me as more than a friend, I still wanted to be his friend. He's like my older brother, my best friend, and losing that felt like I was losing a piece of myself. When I was facing the hardest time in my life, he was there. At first it was about supplying the weed and alcohol, but as we got to know each other it became more than that. It became him being the only person I could run to whenever something happened. When my life went to shit he was there.

Now that he was here; I needed answers.

" Where've you been? I've missed you like hell. Edward keeps placating me and saying you're busy."

He sighed, grabbing a cigarette from his carton; offering one to me. I took it and grabbed his lighter, lighting mine and then his before tossing it back in the cup holder. After putting down the windows just a crack and taking a long puff of his cigarette, he glanced over at me.

" I told him to tell you that for awhile. Figured it would maybe keep you away for at least a few weeks, maybe months."

" I move away and you shut me out? What the fuck is up with that?"

James immediately had an apologetic look on his face, " It was never that, Bella."

" Then what the fuck was it? Huh? I mean, I love Edward and I can talk to him about everything, but you were my best friend...You are my best friend."

" Do you know how hard it was for me to feel the way I did about you and see you with Edward?"

My gaze immediately went down to my hands, and I sighed; shaking my head at myself for being so stupid not to realize it. Fuck.

" I never got time to get over you, Bella. And I needed that, so fucking badly. Edward got that, he felt that. God, I'm lucky that kid still wants to be friends with me after I kissed you."

" I'm sorry." I whispered, " I just kept calling and texting...I'm sorry."

" No, no, no, don't blame yourself. Fuck, and please don't cry. I hate when you cry."

I put out my cigarette in ash tray in the car, leaning forward to put my head in my hands. After a few deep breaths and lingering in the silence, I sat up and looked over at him. He was looking forward at the road, looking to be concentrating very deeply on the landscape.

For a moment I didn't reply to him, trying to figure out the right words to say.

" You're right. I never really gave you time to get over me when I said I would. But I want you to fucking know that I didn't do it to try and make it hard on you; I guess a big part of me thought if we didn't talk that we'd stop being friends, and that would be hard. It was really selfish of me, and it wasn't fair to you."

" I know you didn't do it on purpose. But everything is cool now, so don't dwell on that shit. We've all moved on to better things so let's continue. Want to go through starbucks drive-thru?"

" You read my mind. I could use that."

~\\~

At around nine we got to James' apartment in Port Angeles. It was in a pretty nice area but it was a small one bedroom one bath apartment. A little run down but it was somewhere to stay for the weekend until I could head home, and it was very James-esque. He tossed his keys on the kitchen counter and flopped down on an overstuffed couch.

" Not much, but it's home. I can sleep out here and you can take my bed."

" No, I'll take the couch."

He glared at me, " No way."

" I'm not going near your bed."

I went to the bathroom and set my bag down, looking at myself in the mirror. I slipped my sunglasses off my face and sighed, looking at my entire face. I was a wrec.

Same pale skin.

New purple under eye circles.

Familar red rimmed eyes.

I flushed my face with cold water a few times before drying it with a cloth and entering the small living room and collapsing on the couch as James fumbled in his kitchen. I hadn't slept that well last night, being in Edward's bed without Edward honestly sucked ass.

" You hungry?"

" Not really. Can I just take a nap?"

" Go for it. Remote is on the table if you want to watch TV."

I sunk into the couch, " Thanks."

Since there was no blanket, I just tucked myself into Edward's hoodie I wore to keep warm and sighed deeply, feeling myself slowly drift off and away from all of the stress of the past hours. Distantly I felt a blanket being laid over me, and that was all I could remember until I fell asleep.

~\\~

I was in an out of sleep all day, and James didn't even seem to mind. He sat on the couch at the end and just laid my legs over his lap as he lounged with his laptop on the arm of his couch. He was such a good friend I was sure I didn't deserve it. Eventually I got up to get a drink, and made us lunch with the random shit in his fridge. It ended up being scrambled eggs with green beans and chicken nuggets.

Lunch of fucking champions.

With it we enjoyed a beer. How he supplied it was questionable but I didn't bother.

He was giving me a place to stay for the weekend, I didn't ask questions.

After that I ended up just lying on the couch more, finding myself feeling even more fucking depressed and down as I had been all last night. Nothing could break me out of it, not even James.

I wanted Edward here, or I wanted to be there. But fuck my luck.

At around five I decided to shower, and then do a load of laundry afterwards since he had a machine in the hallway. At least if I did something maybe it could get my mind off of what's going on, and I didn't want to be a bum sitting on James' couch anyways.

I wore Edward's sweatpants and a t-shirt of his once I got out of the shower, which smelt completely of his scent. It only made me miss him even more. But the busier I kept myself the quicker Sunday would be here. Tomorrow I'd book my flight back, and hopefully the price of the ticket wouldn't be too high.

At around seven James said he was heading out to meet up with some friends. He asked me if I wanted to join, but I honestly wasn't in the mood to go out tonight, so he left and told me to help myself to anything I needed and to call him if I had to get a hold of him for some reason.

About eight I decided to call Edward, I hadn't heard from him today, and he wasn't answering his phone at all which made it even worse. To keep my mind off of it I just helped myself to the beers in James' fridge. I'd pay him for it if need be. I just needed my mind off of all the bullshit going on in my life.

As I felt the slight buzz coming over me, I felt the relief of everything. I relished and enjoyed the feeling. It'd been a little too long for me since I'd had a drink compared to how often I used to. The muscles in my body relaxed, and I didn't feel so tense and wound up.

When nine thirty hit I ordered some Chinese take-out, of course after I got the address to his apartment because I had no fucking clue. By the time the food got here I was starved, so I shoved a few bills at the guy and slammed the door without so much as a word besides a thank you.

I sat on the couch with the carton of chicken and another full of shrimp fried rice and watched friends. I kept getting flashbacks of when I was in New York, sitting on my air mattress and eating take-out and watching hours of cable.

Even more depressing.

All of this made me tempted to walk back to New York so I could be with Edward, but I knew that I could survive a few more days without him. I wanted to be able to feel his arms around me, that's what I missed, and his voice and his scent. I laid down on the couch and curled up with the soft blanket James supplied me with.

My mind drifted off to my father, and I felt the tears sting my eyes. I blinked them back and forced myself to try to think of something else, taking another forkful of rice to shove into my mouth.

Unfortunately nothing could get my mind off of it.

~\\~

I heard the click of the front door unlocking, but I didn't switch my gaze from my lap. I twisted my fingers in the blanket that laid over my lap, my eyes slightly burning from all of the crying. Since James was back I had to pull myself together. He shouldn't have to deal with my crying.

The room around me was dark, only the moon shining into the room when the clouds would pass over it in the sky. I could see an illumination of light from the apartment hallway when the door opened. I heard quiet talking, and thought James was on the phone.

Before I heard an all too familiar voice.

Immediately, my head snapped up. Standing at the door, looking at me with a small smile on his face, was him. My Edward. Before I could even comprehend what I was doing, I had sprung off of the couch and leapt into his arms; surrounded by his scent and his warmth. He lifted me up, his arms tightly wrapped around my waist. I locked mine around his neck, holding him to me impossibly close as if he could disappear.

But he was here.

Right now.

" Well, I'll leave both of you to your reunion. No sex on my couch."

I released Edward for a moment and wrapped my arms around James. He chuckled and wrapped his arms around me, kissing the side of my head.

" Thank you for bringing him to me."

" It's what friends do. I'll be back, so stay clothed."

I released James and Edward pulled me into his arms; kissing the top of my head. I listened for James to walk down the hall, and when the sound of a door sounded I leaned up and pressed my lips to Edward's. He drew me closer and slowly walked me backwards until we hit the couch.

My fingers tangled in the short hairs at the nape of his neck, and he smiled against my lips.

" I'll always find a way to you."

I pulled away and leaned my forehead against his. His hand grabbed the hem of his shirt I wore and he looked down, chuckling when he saw me wearing his sweatpants.

" I didn't exactly grab anything other than underwear when I ran to my apartment before flying here."

Edward kissed my forehead, " I can see that. You're fucking adorable in my clothes anyways."

I sat down on the couch and he plopped down next to me, stripping off his jacket and tossing it over the arm of the couch and kicking his shoes off. He wrapped his arms around me once more and laid us down, reaching over to turn the television with the remote laying on the ground below.

" So why didn't you call me and tell me?" I asked him, jabbing my finger into his side.

He glared and grabbed my finger, " I wanted to surprise you, silly girl."

" I thought you were ignoring me."

" You're ridiculous." he growled, turning me over onto my back and leaning down to kiss me. I found myself so lost in his kisses that I didn't even notice James coming out of his room. A loud throat clearing broke us out of it and Edward immediately sat up and sat next to me with his arm around me. I leaned in against him, breathing in his scent.

" Anybody want a beer? Wait, looks like Bella already drank a few."

I smiled bashfully, " I'll give you money for it, honestly. I was just fucking lo-"

" No need to explain." James said, reaching into a lower cabinet and grabbing a twenty four case and a bottle of a blue something. " I knew you'd break into it; so I hid the good stuff."

" Smart man."

" We shouldn't be getting drunk." Edward groaned.

" Maybe not you, but after the day I had yesterday I could use it."

James grabbed two shot glasses and filled them halfway, with what I imagined was UV Blue, the rest of it with lemonade from his fridge. Apparently he was always prepared.

" Then I guess it's Bella and I here instead. You can watch."

" Pour me a shot." Edward resigned.

James fist pumped and grabbed another glass shot to fill up with his drink mixture. Once he finished he passed them to use and I quickly downed it, pushing for more.

" Straight up UV." I said as he finished his shot and reached over for the bottle.

Edward set his shot glass on the counter and James continued to fill. I took mine slower this time, enjoying the slight burn in my throat from not drinking for awhile. After the second, the third went down okay; but it was still strong.

James stopped after two, Edward went to three, but I went to five until I wasn't coherent. It was pretty nice to be able to be able to forget everything for a little while and let loose. Unfortunately when I tried getting touchy with Edward he didn't want to do anything besides laugh at me and try to stop me.

He was just a little shy.

" Stop trying to stick your hand down my pants." Edward whispered into my ear, kissing the shell of it softly.

I wrapped my arms around his waist and moved us from side to side, pressing my lips to his chest through his shirt.

" We should find a way to knock her out." James said, putting the bottles away.

" Shh, no, no. I want to be awake."

Edward sat on the couch and pulled me into his lap. I turned around to straddle him and wrap my arms around his neck to hold him closer.

" Mm, slow it down there." he said, trying to move me from his lap.

I glared at him from my spot alone on the couch and he chuckled. " Don't pout."

" I'm not pouting."

He touched my bottom lip before leaning forward to kiss it, " Yeah you are. But I'm exhausted from my flight across the country, mind if I sleep?"

" Yeah, I'm pretty beat, too. I'll see you guys in the morning. Don't fucking go crazy, Bella Swan."

I rolled my eyes and waved my hand at him, god he was fucking ridiculous at times. I heard his door slam and Edward sat up and took his belt off, setting it on the floor and then taking his jeans off and grabbing the extra pair of sweatpants I'd brought for myself here.

" You never sleep in those." I whined, grabbing the waistband as he took off the tight button up he wore.

" And that shirt is tight."

" It's fitted, not tight." he corrected in a teasing voice.

" Whatever."

He rolled his eyes, " Okay, Miss. Cranky Ass."

Before I could retort anything, he grabbed onto me and positioned himself to lay behind me with his arms around me. I turned around and buried my face in his chest, breathing his scent in deeply. His hands immediately went to rubbing my back soothingly, which made me let out a deep sigh.

" Just relax, baby." he whispered, combing one of his hands through my hair.

Even though my insides were jumping around and jittery, I felt myself calm in his arms.

" Do you want to see your dad at all for the rest of the weekend?" he asked.

I shook my head, " No, not at all."

" Just wanted to make sure. I love you."

" Love you, too." I mumbled.

" Go to sleep." Edward murmured with assurance in my ear, " I'll be here when you wake up. I promise."

~\\~

I heard the loud knocking on the door before it busted opened and I groaned, seeing the annoying light in my vision as I lay on the bathroom floor. The tile was hard and cold, but right now it was so comfortable, and the mat really worked as a pillow for my head. So soft.

" What the fuck? I have to take a piss." James complained, grabbing my wrists and pulling me off the floor.

On today of all days the sun had decided to shine, and the apartment was filled with the annoying light. My head pounded and I slumped against the hallway wall where James let me and shut the bathroom door. I flicked him off through the door and stumbled to the living room. Edward was in the kitchen, so fucking deliciously shirtless, only wearing a pair of jeans and the signature 'Calvin Klein' band showing from his underwear.

I came up behind him as he made coffee, slipping my arms around his waist.

" Where are the silk boxers?" I asked, running my finger along the waistband.

" Way too high school." He chuckled.

I kissed the center of his back and pulled away from him. He turned around and scrunched his nose up.

Goddamn so fucking adorable.

Why is he especially cute today?

" You smell like alcohol and toothpaste mixed with cigarette's."

" I know I need to shower. Would you like to join me?"

" No showering together while I'm here." James said as he walked into the room, pulling a shirt over his head.

Edward chuckled, " No preserving water? We know you're all for that these days."

James rolled his eyes, " Fuck off, Edward. Lucky for you, I'm out of food so I'm grabbing breakfast for you people. Shower fast." he grabbed his keys off the counter and Edward tossed him a twenty, telling him to get coffee too because apparently Edward didn't see that the coffee grounds were old.

The front door shut and taking me completely off guard, I was lifted over Edward's shoulder as he carried me to the bathroom, shutting the door firmly behind him and pushing my shirt up; leaning forward to press his lips to mine quickly.

" We have like fifteen minutes." I mumbled against his lips.

" That's enough for a shower." he replied, smiling against my lips.

I pushed him off and glared at him, " Stop teasing me about your plans to stay celibate. Are you trying to become a born-again virgin?" I asked, tossing my shirt over my head and letting it fall to the floor.

" Why would I do that?" he asked with a laugh, tugging on his zipper.

I slipped out of the sweatpants of his I wore, along with the rest of my clothes.

" Because you have a naked girl right in front of you and nothing is happening. Wait, are you gay?"

He glared back at me, taking off his pants and underwear and kicking it near where my clothes lay on the ground. He took a step towards me and put his arms around me, his bare body against mine.

" I am straight as a pin." he whispered in my ear, making shivers run down my spine. I felt his teeth graze the shell of my ear, and he flicked his tongue against it.

" If I wanted to have my fucking wicked way with you here; I would. But I have more respect for my girlfriend than to screw around with her in a grimy shower. Would you like to be pressed against that wall?"

I glanced over my shoulder, and then back at him, " Probably not."

" Then don't question me." he growled, picking me up and putting me in the shower.

He switched on the hot water, making me scream when I was blasted with cold until it warmed up. Once he joined me, I felt his arms enveloping me in his arms as we stood underneath the water.

We washed our bodies, and I was glad that James had some regular dove soap. I didn't want to smell like Irish Spring today. Edward apparently wasn't interested either, but I didn't exactly give him a choice either...

By the time we had finished showering; James was back and eating on the couch with a coke in his hand. McDonalds breakfast biscuit with a coke, which sounded edible to me. Edward handed me my coffee and biscuit and we sat down on the floor in the living room.

" Thanks for getting food." Edward said.

James laughed, " You paid, why are you thanking me?"

Edward rolled his eyes and took a sip of his coffee, " Don't be a dick and just accept it."

" Boys." I sighed, taking a bite of my sandwich.

They both shook their head at me, " We are men, Bella. Strong men."

I scoffed, " Yeah, okay."

We finished our breakfast, and Edward made some extra eggs for himself because of his bottomless stomach that was still hungry. I laid on the couch, still nursing a pounding headache that Advil was just not helping; or coffee. James poked my leg and stood up from the floor.

" If you're so tired go sleep in my room, lazy ass. I prefer sitting on the couch instead of having some chick take over it."

" Then I'll take the floor." I said, sitting up slowly and holding my head so I wouldn't get a head rush from getting up.

Edward came into the room and looked at James, slipping his phone into the pocket of his jeans. I looked at him, mesmerized by him for a moment as he smiled at me and sat on the arm of the couch.

" We'll be out of your hair tonight. I figured Bella and I could stay at a hotel in Seattle tonight, do some fucking fun shit in Seattle tomorrow and take Monday off and fly back to New York. I already booked our flight for Monday, and the hotel for two nights."

" And let me guess, someone needs a ride to Seattle?"

" Have I mentioned you're my best friend?"

" Fuck you."

" Maybe later."

~\\~

I groaned deeply as my body sunk into the huge king sized mattress. It felt amazing compared to sleeping on a couch. But I was fucking appreciative of James taking me in, he was a great friend and I was lucky to have him.

Instead of having him drive us out to Seattle, Esme had gotten a hold of Edward and all but begged him to come have dinner with them. So James drove us to the Cullens, and we spent part of the afternoon and our evening with them and Carlisle graciously offered to drive us out to Seattle. Esme almost convinced us to stay the night, but since everything was booked it was better we left anyways.

Edward had booked a Hilton, which was no shocker to me. When he does something, he goes all fucking out. There was a huge bed in the room, a flat screen, a desk, couch and ottoman, along with a huge bathroom that came along with a ridiculously sized bathtub and a mini-fridge in the room also.

It was decadent, and I couldn't believe that he'd gone this far for two nights, but apparently he wanted to treat us both. I'd never even been in a Hilton resort before.

I felt Edward grab a hold of my heels and slip them off, along with my jeans, and I sat up to slip my shirt off. At the moment I realized that I desperately needed clothes, and in the morning we could walk to some shops and I could get something and change. After securing the door, Edward got ready for bed and slipped in next to me, wrapping his arms smoothly around my waist and kissing the side of my head.

" Can I take this bed back to New York with me?"

He chuckled and placed small kisses down my temple, my jaw and neck. " No, you can't. But I'll make you a deal, when we get our own place; we'll have a bed even more comfortable than this."

" Deal." I replied

I turned in his arms and pressed my lips to his gently. He sighed against my lips and responded to my kiss, one hand moving up to cup my jaw. His lips parted and our mouths slanted over each others, my tongue slowly meeting his in a delicate dance. I'd never be able to explain what it felt like to feel him kiss me, the passion that built up inside of me, the love that I felt towards him.

My hands met the hem of his shirt, and I slid them underneath it; feeling smooth, hard abs. I splayed my fingers across the skin, touching and feeling the warmth that gave off. A quiet moan escaped him, and I could feel his hand skimming the skin exposed from my shirt riding up. He pushed it up further on my back to expose and explore more skin.

He squeezed me in his arms and slowly released, pulling away from my lips and pressing his forehead to mine.

" Love you." I heard him whisper, kissing my cheek.

" I love you, too." I replied, just as quiet as I settled in for a night's sleep.

~\\~

When I awoke in the morning, the room was cast in a grey haze, the rain lightly rapping against the windows of the room. My eyes adjusted to the small amount of light and I looked next to me, expecting to see Edward, but all I found was a note, and a muffin on the bedside table. As I sat up, I felt a harsh chill hit my skin.

My shirt was missing.

Goddamnit, Edward...

I grabbed the note and sunk back into the mattress.

_Good morning beautiful, I went out quickly to get something and I promise to return to you soon after you wake. There is some coffee brewing in the pot for you, and room service brought a muffin. Don't be alarmed if you notice a missing shirt._

_I love you_

_-Edward_

I smiled at him and his secrets and grabbed the muffin, eagerly biting into it upon hearing my stomach let out a quiet growl. I hopped out of the bed quickly and fixed myself a cup of coffee before running back to the bed.

When I finished my coffee and muffin, I looked over at the clock and saw it was only nine thirty. Edward must have been up early, and I didn't know why, but he was doing something apparently. So while he left I allowed myself to go back to sleep for a little while longer since there was nothing I could do at the moment.

At some time, I was awoken by the hotel room door shutting. I was too tired to get up and see what Edward had been up to, but I had felt him crawl into the bed and turn me onto my back, leaning in to give me a slow kiss.

" Good morning, love."

" Where were you?" I asked in a quiet mumble.

" Just picked up a little something for you, beautiful."

I looked past him and saw three bags on the bed. Victoria's Secret, Seven Jeans and a plain black bag. He smiled at me and dragged the bags closer.

" I hope you don't mind, but I figured I'd go shopping for you. Is that fucking weird?"

With a shake of my head, I glanced at him. " Not at all. I just wish you didn't go off and buy two hundred dollar jeans."

He kissed my lips, " I have no idea what you are referring to."

Handing me the first bag, I pulled out a pair of straight leg dark wash jeans. Size 1, fitted. Perfect. But I knew that Seven For all Man Kind were an expensive brand of jeans, but I wouldn't argue with him about it. Not fucking worth it.

Inside of the bag for the jeans, was another bag from Dolce and Gabbana.

" My god, Edward, how much did you spend?"

" Just look at it."

Inside that bag was a white flowy tank top that was made out a very silky fabric, obviously very expensive and very nice quality. There was also a light floral pattern on it, and I wasn't too girly in my clothes, but it was very tasteful and the colors and pattern were really beautiful. I loved it.

" Do you like it? I was taking a big fucking leap with it."

" I love it, it's beautiful. Thank you." I said, leaning forward to peck his lips before gently folding the shirt into my lap.

He handed me the black bag, which held a shoe box, and inside there was a pair of black wedged flats, with a knot design on top of it that were super fucking cute.

How was it that my own boyfriend could shop better than me?

" Now I'm questioning you being straight." I informed him, placing the shoe in the box.

" Stop being ridiculous. Here, look at this."

He gave me the final bag, from Victoria's Secret, and I took out all of the obnoxious pink tissue paper. Inside there was a simple white demi bra, to which I was grateful that he didn't go all outrageous with some weird pattern. But of course he added in a white thong, with a ruched front that had two pink bows and a heart polka-dot pattern.

" And how did you know my bra size?"

" Why do you think you're missing a shirt? I had to take it off to check the goddamn tag without waking you up."

I leaned up into a kneel and wrapped my arms around him, feeling like a mess next to his perfectly dressed and showered self. He tugged me into his arms and pulled me on top of him. I let out a surprised laugh, pushing my hair out of my face to kiss him soundly.

We made out on the bed for only a few minutes later before I had to get up and take a shower. The shampoo supplied here wasn't exactly the best, and it smelt really generic, but luckily I had a small travel sized bottle, travalo, which holds the perfume I use right in my purse. After washing up I wrapped a towel around me and stepped out of the bathroom, letting the bathroom air out from all the steam.

I grabbed my purse and admired Edward laying across the bed watching TV. He glanced at me with a wink, to which I returned before stepping into the bathroom. Using the few makeup items I kept in my purse; I applied a light powder foundation, a little black eyeliner and some mascara. I blow dried my hair straight and brushed my teeth thoroughly.

After changing into my clothes I stepped into the room and fixed my things in my bag.

" God, it feelt amazing to be able to wear clean, fresh clothes." I said, sitting on the edge of the bed and slipping into them.

I felt him sweep my hair over my shoulder and kiss the exposed skin gently. I'd wondered what had gotten into him this morning, over the past few months he'd been keeping it pretty PG between us, which was fucking annoying, but he had reasons he believed were valid.

" Maybe we should just stay in and watch TV all day." he whispered against my skin, pulling me backwards on my bed and leaning down to kiss my lips.

" As much as I would love that...What's gotten into you today?"

" I'm just so damn grateful to have you. I hope you know that. And when I pull away from you, it's not because I don't feel the same way you feel. If it were up to me we'd never leave the fucking bed ever."

" Such a way with words."

He pushed my bangs from my face, " I just don't want you to feel like I'm rejecting you. Ever."

" I can't help but feel it, Edward." I whispered.

" I want you. Always." he replied in a breathy tone.

I smiled, " Thanks for the reminder. Now as much as I want to lay in bed with you all day, we need to get off our asses and do something."

He quickly sprung off the bed and pulled me up against him, " You're wish is my demand, beautiful."

**Authors Note- So this chapter was a little filler-ish, and more light-hearted since the last chapter. I've been taking a little time every other day to write this chapter, until finally I got it finished.**

**To start at the beginning, I am sincerely sorry about the lack of updates, I really never thought I'd hit a brick wall with THIS story, but I did. The first reason I hadn't been updating was because things had been going great for me, I had a lot of good new things that were distracting. I didn't have time to write, I barely got to a computer unless it was late. And at that point I was moving on from fanfiction and feeling like I didn't have it in me to write because I'd gotten caught up in other things. Honestly, I didn't want to write anymore, I won't lie.**

**And about two weeks ago I'd really hit another wall in life, and I was thrown back a leap and had to deal with personal issues. I was trying to force myself to write during this time, but I was only getting frustrated and honestly, really annoyed with the fact that I couldn't get an update out and I just didn't have it in me. I needed a break.**

**Writers Block was a HUGE issue. I'd honestly never experienced it this badly. Right now, I am not going to promise weekly updates, but I am going to try and do bi-weekly updates. Your reviews have really, really brightened me up and made me want to write again. Hopefully things will straighten out and I can get back on schedule, but I can't make promises.**

**I love you guys.**

**And if it isn't too much leave a little review? I'd appreciate it a lot.**


	31. I Dont Want This Night to End

**Authors Note- BEFORE YOU READ THE CHAPTER!**

**Okay, just to let you guys know, this chapter has been finished for a little over a week, before you freak out, I only did it so I could get a good go-ahead on the next chapter so it won't be too long between this update and that one! Now, the next chapter is unfinished, but it's about the same length as this but going to be LONGER! This one is a little filler-ish, but if you read the end Author Note below, you will know why; but I did add a little extra something in there for you all…ENJOY!**

**Disclaimer- S. Meyer owns all things Twilight.**

**I Dont Want This Night to End by: Luke Bryan**

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BPOV

~\\~

Once Edward and I had pealed ourselves away from the comfortable bed at the hotel, we had thrust ourselves into the crazy city of Seattle. The air was only slightly chilly, but Edward had given me his sweatshirt. It covered the top he bought me, but I knew that he enjoyed seeing me in his clothes either way.

We started our day out by heading to Snoqualmie Falls. Edward and I didn't take the actual three hour tour, but we didn't want to sit on a fucking bus or walk through the forest and have to listen to some person tell us all the history. Instead, we made our own way there and watched the waterfall. It was near the Salish Lodge, and we'd enjoyed a little bit of time there before rounding back and taking a cab to Pike Place, which was somewhere I'd always enjoy going to whenever I was in Seattle. Obviously we didn't get anything to bring back home, but it was fun to look around anyways. All the bright colored fresh fruits and vegetables would be cool to take home, unfortunately I couldn't.

Afterwards we walked out to look at Elliot bay for just a few short minutes, watching the waves of the ocean, and then just decided to walk around the shops downtown. Everything we'd done wasn't planned, which felt fucking nice. In college, it was pretty rare for Edward and I to have an entire day to just wander aimlessly around. I was always working, and that conflicted a lot with his classes. We had opposite schedules, which pretty much sucked. Needless to say, we looked forward to professors cancelling a class or work calling me off if it was a dead day and only Jenna was there.

If Makenna was enjoying a night with a new fucking flavor of the week, sometimes I could get a hold of Edward and spend the night with him. This included Brett being in the room, and sometimes a girl that Brett liked bringing along.

This included their four in the morning sex sessions, clearly aware of other people in the room but not giving a shit. Luckily, those nights are few and far between; but needless to say the nights I had wished I'd stayed home, with walls between me and the person getting it on with some random guy or girl. But I endured it just to be with Edward.

" Why are we going into starbucks?"

He looked at me like I was insane " Because the hotel room coffee is shit, am I wrong?"

Edward slipped out his card and ordered us both coffee, and I smiled when I heard him rattle off my usual drink because he remembered.

" Want anything else?" he asked before paying. I shook my head and he ordered a scone anyways, handing a fresh one to me when the barista handed it over before making the drinks.

He leaned over for a bite and kissed my cheek, " It's good, eat it."

I rolled my eyes at him and took a bite of the warm treat. When the coffee was done Edward handed me mine and we stepped back out on the sidewalk, looking at things that were placed perfectly in the windows.

" You skipping class all day tomorrow?" I asked him.

" Yeah, what's one day? We can lay in bed and do nothing."

" When is our flight?"

He swallowed a gulp of his coffee, " Six AM. And we have to get there about an hour early for security, and up earlier before that to get dressed."

" Most definitely laying in bed all day tomorrow." I affirmed

~\\~

Edward and I had lunch at a small cafe downtown. They had some pretty good sandwiches and it was something to eat before going out to dinner later. After lunch we went to Harborview Park, and the weather was really nice out to go for a walk and sit on the benches.

At around one, I got a call from work asking me when I was going to be back, and I was going to be picking up a shift on Tuesday. These past few days kind of spoiled me from not having to work and go to school, so the sound of going back just irritated me at this point. All day I tried not to let my mind wander to Charlie, and I was surprised not to have gotten a call from my mother right now. It was possible that Sue gave her a call, but I was sure she'd try to contact me. I wasn't going to fucking dwell on it, maybe it was better that I take a long pause from family and focus on school and work. It was more important than to have my father breaking me down.

Edward didn't seem to mind, or even notice, my small bouts of spacing seeming to distract me for a few moments. I just tried to focus on the feel of his warm hand in mine, and his soft, velvety voice speaking close to my ear. The gentle brush of his arm against mine and the tightening of our hands that were strung together.

He made it all disappear; made everything that was wrong just disappear and replace it with a euphoric, joyful feeling that would hit me right to my core.

" What do you want to do next?" he asked, pulling me close to him as we sat side by side on a park bench.

" Just be here with you." I replied.

" We could do something fun..."

I brushed his crazy bronze hair from his eyes, " Fun means get a piercing to you."

" Or a tattoo."

" How would you know if that's fun; you don't even have one."

Edward laughed at me, kissing my forehead, " I should have known you wouldn't have noticed. You seemed very...distracted that night. I have a tattoo on my hip. It's small, and fucking stupid, but it was in the basement of one of my friends; his older brother did it."

" You're so lying to me Edward Masen!"

He looked around before grabbing onto my hands and focusing in on me, " Come here." he said, pulling me into his lap, facing him.

Edward pushed down the side of his jeans at his hip, bringing his underwear with him. And there it was, a small little music note on his hip. It was just simple; black. Nothing special but I knew at the time it was probably awesome to Edward. Of course it was a music note though, that was no surprise.

" How have I never noticed that?"

" Don't know, but it's there." he said, covering it up again and kissing me once again.

" You should get a new one. Property of Isabella Swan, stamped right on that cute ass."

He chuckled, " Oh, yeah?"

" Fuck, yes."

" You're ridiculous."

I rested my hand on his chest and he placed his hand over mine, " You've said that too many times before."

" I love that about you."

" Hm?"

" I love that you're ridiculous. You know that you say stupid, random ass shit but I love it. It doesn't matter what comes to mind, ridiculous or absolutely brilliant; I adore all of it. The fact that you can be ridiculous and yourself is sexy."

A smile spread across my face and I leaned forward and caught my lips in a kiss with his. He moved his hand from mine and slid it over my shoulder, to the back of my neck to tangle in my hair and grip me closer to him. I held my coffee tight in my one hand, not wanting to drop it but feeling myself melt into his kiss. Lips so soft and moist, perfectly fitting against mine to move in perfect sync with each other; both of us giving and taking equally.

Slowly he pulled away, kissing my jaw firmly, " As much as I would love to enjoy more of that; we're in public and I'm sure this is frowned upon."

" That's too bad. I was really enjoying myself." I murmured, leaning against him

He ran his fingers through my hair and placed a soft kiss on my forehead. " I can't think of anything else to do here."

" I've been here more times then I can count. Just fucking being here with you is enough for me."

The smile on his face was infectious, and he flicked my lip ring once before pushing us up off the bench. I finished the rest of my coffee and tossed the empty cup in the trash can next to the bench. We finished a walk through Olympic Park and headed more towards downtown.

Neither of us really followed any specific direction; just aimlessly walking around town. All the places were familiar, been there done that, and Edward joked about going to see the Space Needle. As if I hadn't been in Seattle at night a thousand times with James and his friends, wandering the streets high and asking for the tour there. I think I'd seen it about seven times in my life; that was more than enough to satisfy me.

We decided to walk over to Seattle Art Museum, which I'd actually never had a chance to see at all. Edward seemed to be even more interested then I was, but it was pretty cool to see all of the art that they had on display; also some of the structures that were there were also interesting. I'd never really been an artsy person, but some of it seemed to have caught my eye. I often found it hard to find the meaning of a painting so I generally gave up on it and just looked at it all as just colors on canvas.

" Were you bored to death in there?" Edward asked, putting his arm around my shoulders as we walked down the stairs of the tall, stone building.

" No, it was actually kind of interesting." I said, poking his side.

" Good. I'd rather hate to bore you, Miss. Isabella." he said teasingly, jumping off the last two stairs and grabbing my wrists before I could hit the last one; twirling me around in his arms. I gripped his shoulders and laughed against his neck; feeling the air lift my hair from my back.

The rest of our afternoon and most of our evening passed rather quickly, and when it started to get darker out; we were pretty starving after walking around so much through-out the day. We went to the Metropolitan Grill on 2nd Avenue, which was less than even a mile walk away from the Museum we'd been at.

The dinner was actually really delicious, and the nine layer chocolate cake was even better. Edward and I shared it, considering it was filling as fuck, but I enjoyed it right down to the last lick on my fork.

By the time dinner was finished it was around eight, and both Edward and I were exhausted at that point after such a long, but great, day. We got back to the hotel right before nine, and Edward let himself sink deep into the mattress. I slipped my shoes off and set my bag down on the desk in the room.

He pealed himself up off the bed and stretched his arms above his head. " I'm going to shower."

I nodded, " Yeah."

Edward grabbed his clothes and went into the bathroom, leaving the door open just a crack. Within a few minutes he was finished and came out wearing a pair of plaid, drawstring sleep pants that were slung low on his hips, no shirt covering his gorgeous chest. The bathroom smelled like Axe, and I quirked a brow at him as the smell flooded into the room.

" Think I was going to shower using the shit they gave us? Fuck no, I have stuff for you in there too."

I smiled gratefully at him and went to take a shower myself, enjoying the hot water on my skin, washing the smell of outside off of me. Edward had bought my same strawberry scented shampoo, but some kind of citrus body wash that smelled pretty intoxicating. I knew that's probably why Edward picked it up.

When I was finished I wrapped one towel around my body and the other around my hair. I washed my face and brushed my teeth before ruffling my hair in the towel until it was damp. In the bedroom Edward was laying on top of the sheets, watching something in TV. His eyes peeled away from the screen when I walked out in only a towel, and I rolled my eyes, looking through my bag to find something acceptable to sleep in, but there was almost nothing. I grabbed a pair of boy short underwear and one of the two white t-shirts Edward had left in his bag.

Slipping on the underwear was easy, but I dropped the towel, keeping my back to Edward to pull the shirt above my head. Before I could even get it over my head I felt two arms pulling me back against a smooth, hard chest. The click of the television turned off echoing in the room.

I let out a quiet gasp and felt Edward's lips pressed against my neck, his teeth and tongue grazing the sensitive skin.

There was a part of me that wanted to pull away, and ask him if this was just another one of those times where he would shut me down.

But a bigger part just wanted to attack him, and feel more of this. It was so much more than he'd given me in the past few months, and it was enough to light my body on fire. I'd missed feeling his body against mine, bare and smooth. There was nothing compared to it, and since the day he'd left for New York all those months ago, my body had only begged me for more of him.

" Please don't tease me anymore." I sighed, feeling one of his hands slide up my stomach.

Edward turned me around to face him and slid one hand through my hair and to the back of my neck, anchoring my lips towards his. Finally our lips met in a heated kiss, and I wrapped my arms around his waist, pressing my body right up against his.

Something about this kiss felt different from all of the others, more passionate and meaningful; filled with unhinged desire and pure want. His tongue was hot and heavy against mine, moving in a way that was furious but somehow languid. Our tangled limbs moved back towards the bed, until both of us fall onto the soft mattress.

Edward pulled away to catch his breath, and I felt his hips against mine, pressing me into the mattress as he stared down at me; running a finger down the side of my face, making me close my eyes from the feeling. Before they could open his lips were on mine again, and I could feel his desire for me.

I wanted him badly. I wanted to feel that connection with him that I felt that night. I needed to.

And I was sure he needed it just as much as I did.

" Please." I whispered against his lips, touching the drawstring on his pants.

With a deep sigh I felt him pull away, and I looked up at him; hoping he wasn't going to reject me this time.

" Baby, I don't have a condom...Fuck."

I shook my head, " No, it's okay."

" Bella, I'm not...without..."

" No, I mean it's taken care of; don't worry about it."

Realization dawned on him, and he didn't say anything else. Slowly, he dipped down and placed a gentler kiss on my lips, his arms coming to wrap around me. A quiet moan escaped me when I felt his long fingers touch the side of my body, sinking into my skin as he gripped onto me.

Slight sweat beaded on Edward's chest, and I pulled my lips from his and moved down to his neck, grazing my teeth along his skin to spur him on. He rocked his body into mine, moaning quietly into my ear and kissing the shell of it.

" Do you know how crazy you make me. You dropped that fucking towel on purpose."

I bite the skin between where his neck met his shoulder, cutting his words off and making yet another groan come from him.

" Are you going to keep interrupting?" I asked him as his mouth found more skin to feast on.

He glared at me and bit my arm, making me yelp, " No, are you?"

" I haven't deci- Fuuuuuu-"

~\\~

" Bella, sweetheart." a quiet voice whispered as soft lips peppered my body with light kisses.

I sighed, burying my face into the soft feather pillow next to me.

" We have to get up for the airport." he said, laying on top of me and kissing my face everywhere.

" Do we have to?" I asked, my voice rough and thick with sleep.

He smiled against the corner of my mouth, " I don't want to either, but we have to."

My eyes fluttered open and I was met with familiar green eyes. They were bright, and his entire expression was relaxed and giving off pure happiness. It was something I'd missed seeing from him. I wrapped my arms around him and felt his lips press against mine, so soft and warm. I didn't want this to end.

" Mm, I'd love to take this further but we are going to be late. And there's no fucking way we can get any other flight."

" Okay, okay." I whispered, holding the sheet to my chest as I sat up. My entire body felt boneless, but much like how Edward appeared; relaxed.

I looked up and him, seeing that he had put his sleep pants back on, and his hair was fucking insane.

" Shower?" he asked.

" No, too tired." I sighed, lying back on the bed.

" Well, good, because we don't exactly have time for that anyways. I'll get you some clothes." he said, kissing my forehead before getting off the bed.

He rustled around for a bit before setting a few clothing articles on the bed and getting dressed him. I couldn't help but watch. I mean, he watched me last night but it was only fair. Although I didn't give him a spectacular view of my ass like he was giving me of his right now.

Unfortunately, his boxer briefs soon covered it, followed by his skinny jeans. He hooked his keys onto his belt loop and tossed a white v-neck over his head, quickly applying deodorant and cologne before shoving it into his bag.

I pealed myself out of bed and slipped on the clothes that Edward supplied me with. Including my jeans from yesterday and one of his white v-necks that was left. I was able to tie it at the side to make it more fitted. Combing through my hair was an even harder task, it was tangled pretty badly, but I was able to smooth it out and put it up in a ponytail. After applying eyeliner and a coat of mascara I was finished with everything and Edward had our bags already packed to go.

We went downstairs for check-out and had a cab waiting for us that Edward called in. The ride to the airport seemed quick, and I was curled into Edward's side with my head on his shoulder.

Security was a fucking bitch, nothing new there. And by the time we got into our second class seats, I was almost a completely goner from pure exhaustion. Edward looked pretty tired himself, but then again we didn't get much sleep last night, and yesterday had been a very long day.

I just couldn't wait to be back in New York and to put this behind me.

~\\~

I fell asleep for about four hours of the long flight, and Edward was trying to sleep but epically failing. He said that he wasn't a big fan of flying, and this was a good six and a half hour trip. At least it was better than three days of driving.

When the captain announced we were landing, I was relieved to get the fuck off the plane. Edward had his car here apparently, and he had to pay the airport upfront before we left for the overnight fees. So while he took care of that I grabbed the bags from baggage claim and met him out front. He took the things from me and we walked through the busy airport, being shoved around by inconsiderate assholes.

Instead of separating, we just went to my dorm for the rest of the day. We'd have gone to his dorm, but he was in no mood to deal with Brett's antics according to him. Compared to this morning Edward was in an opposite state of mind.

He set his bag down on the floor of my bedroom and sat on my bed, running his hands over his face. Makenna wasn't here, so I wouldn't have to deal with her twenty questions until later. I tossed all of the dirty laundry in my bag in the hamper and sat next to Edward, resting my hand on his knee.

" What's wrong?" I asked.

" Nothing is wrong, I'm just tired and irritated as fuck."

" Well, I'm going to shower, how about you try to sleep?" I suggested, getting up and letting my hand fall from him.

He didn't say anything as I stepped out of the room and went to take a shower. It felt good to wash off after being in a plane and an airport, especially since I couldn't shower after Edward and I had...

Was that why he was irritated?

This morning he seemed perfectly alright, I don't think he could so such a three sixty from that. It would just be ridiculous. We were two grown adults, in a relationship. And if he thought us having sex was something we should have waited longer for than I wouldn't know what the fuck to do anymore.

After my shower I didn't bother to blow dry my hair, just ruffled it until it was damp with a towel and combed through it. When I got into my room, Edward was completely passed out, sprawled out all over my bed. I slipped into a pair of shorts and a tank top and attempted to fit in my bed with Edward. After shoving at his side a little bit, he rolled over and clung to the pillow next to him, to which I rolled my eyes and pulled the comforter up to my shoulders, leaning over to kiss his neck softly.

I was able to nap for a good two hours, until I was pretty much awake and just hungry. So I left Edward in bed and went to find something to eat. As I was looking through the cabinets for something to eat; Makenna walked in and put her things near the living room, her eyes widening when she saw me.

I wasn't surprised to see someone standing next to her, a tall guy with olive toned skin and dark, short, spiky hair. He was giving me a thorough once over, his dark, invading eyes looking over my shorts and tank top. I wished I'd put something on over it, but it was too fucking late for that.

Makenna huffed and took her know out, probably disappointed that I was ruining her fun by being here.

" Bella, you're here? I had no idea where you were." she exclaimed in a faux worried voice.

" Family emergency. Sorry to crash your party."

She gave me a sugary-sweet smile, " Of course not. Garrett and I were just planning on studying together."

More like fucking together.

I rifled through the cabinets even more, before opening up the fridge to try and find something to eat. Makenna kissed Gary, or whatever the hell his name was, and said she'd be right back. He stood near the kitchen opening, watching me in a weird way as I moved around looking for food. I gave him a weird look before turning my attention back to what I was doing.

Creep.

Slowly he walked into the room and leaned against the counter, his hands on either side of the counter. Finally, I just went to the cabinet and grabbed my box of honey nut cheerios. I reached up infront of me to grab the box, and behind me I could feel an unfamiliar body that was way too fucking close for my liking.

I could sense his eyes on me like a vulture with ever move I made, for what reason I had no idea.. I could feel that his gaze was burning holes in the back of my head, but I also could tell he was staring down my shirt. It was honestly disturbing, and just gross.

He hadn't even been in here five minutes and he was already trying to make a move on me, after coming here with Makenna; what a goddamn tool.

I could feel his face lean in closer to mine, and I felt his hand graze my back in a way that made me shiver; and not in a good way. Goosebumps broke out on my skin, yet my forehead started to sweat as I got nervous. When it came to guys, I always froze up if they went too far; unless it was some weirdo like Mike Newton because I knew he was just spineless.

I tensed up and fisted my hand, ready for anything.

" Do you have a boyfriend, baby?" he whispered lowly in my ear,

" Get the fuck away from me." I said lowly, giving him a warning.

" No reason to be like that, sweetheart. So feisty, and so much sexier than that blonde bitch."

I was just about to launch my elbow right into his stomach when I heard someone enter the room swiftly.

Edward.

Thank fuck.

Immediately, he backed away from me and Edward had his menacing glare on the guys face. It was no surprise that Edward was a head taller than him, standing at more than the average height of the douche bag. I saw Edward curl his fist into the guys t-shirt, slamming his back hard into our counters.

" You lay one fucking hand on her and I'll have no problem kicking the shit out of you. How about you go find who you came here with, hm?" he said, pulling him forward and shoving him into the wall that the open door was near. He stumbled against it and didn't look back as he strode through the hall, opening a door and slamming it loudly; making a surprised yell from Makenna sound from the other room.

" Who the fuck is that bastard?"

" Makenna's new conquest." I said, watching as Edward slipped off his hoodie and put it on me to cover me up more before wrapping his arms around me.

" Now I have to shower again." I whined, shivering at the memory of him touching me.

His lips grazed my ear and he nipped at it once, flicking it with his tongue.

" I can arrange that." he whispered roughly into my ear, lifting me up completely in his arms and tossing me over his shoulder.

~\\~

It was no shocker that Edward wanted to make a show of us showering together, but I didn't exactly give a fuck either way if there were other people here. After he showered we hid away in my room for awhile before he had to head back to campus. I didn't want to let him go as I drove him to Rose Hall, but I had to. He only left me wanting more with a soft, lingering kiss in my car.

When I got back to my dorm that night, I laid in my bed looking at the ceiling; thinking over this weekend, everything that happened with my father. And in all of that time I realized that there was probably a reason that he fucking treated me the way that he did. I didn't mean a reason as to his actions.

But a reason as to why I had to live the life I did with him all these years. The torture of having to deal with his cruel looks and words, and feeling his attempt to try and strangle and hurt me. There was a reason that I got through it. Because through all the bad everybody goes through in life, all of the torture...It leads up to something good in the end, even if it seems like it might never come.

That was why I had Edward.

And through all the bullshit, all of the hurt, rejection and pain…

He was worth every single moment of it.

**Authors Note- So, I know this chapter was a little filler-ish as I said above, but I kind of wanted to just make it a happy-go-lucky chapter before I start jumping around and getting to the gritty parts planned for the end of the story.**

**YES, I said end. So, this story will probably be ending at around forty chapters, possibly even 35 because we all know how much I enjoy even numbers on stories! There are a few obvious things to address here in The Story of Us, so I'd like to of course take time to tie up loose ends; I'm not rushing anything; detail is my thing, you guys know that.**

**So, reviews will be getting teasers this time around, how awesome is that? I'm really excited about hopefully getting back into a more regular schedule instead of one chapter at the beginning and end of the months!**

**So REVIEWS mean TEASERS for the next chapter, and I HONESTLY mean it!**


	32. You're My Better Half

**Authors Note-READ ON!**

**Disclaimer- S. Meyer owns all things Twilight.**

**Chapter Song- You're My Better Half by: Keith Urban**

*** Small obsession with country music these days, get used to it!***

~\\~

May

~\\~

I was surrounded by beautiful, light lavender walls in a big room. The front wall had hand painted white leaves that covered the wall elegantly and framed the large king sized bed perfectly. It matched the pristine white pillows, and picked up the bright color of the silver ones too. The dark purple bed comforter was stark against it, but somehow it seems to fit in a way that pulled all of the colors together. The hint of a dark color kept it modern and fresh but with a touch of warmth.

The white wood furniture blended in well with the tranquil sense that the room held. It was peaceful and calm; which was something I needed being here, so close to where all of the stress of my teenage years lingered on. But I was doing this to be with Edward, so it was worth every moment.

It was the end of the school year, and with that I found myself taking a leave of absence from work so that I could spend the summer with Edward in Forks. It had taken him weeks of convincing me, but soon enough I found myself unpacking my things in the guest room down the hall of his room at the grand Cullen mansion.

Esme and Carlisle were very welcoming, especially Esme. When I showed up here she'd baked a huge fucking amount of chocolate cookies and left them in a platter in my room. It definitely beat the mints they left on the pillows of a hotel room. Carlisle also was pretty nice towards me, ever since that night at the hospital he'd honestly changed how he acted towards me. And he was getting along with Edward a little bit more, which I was sure seemed to make Esme so happy.

But with finals taking over my thought process, and everything but summer break on my mind for the entire beginning of May, it was easier than Edward had originally thought it'd be to convince me to go with him to Forks. God know I didn't want to fucking be there, but if that was where Edward was going to be...

I was going to be there.

That was all that mattered to me really.

We only really had one boundary that Esme had put in place when I got here. We had to stay in separate rooms; which was why I was in the lovely guest room.

When we had arrived there on May 13th, Alice had literally gone ballistic when she saw both of us coming through the terminal; basically flying Edward down to the floor saying how much she missed him. I thought Esme had been bad, holding him in such a tight grip that I thought she was glued to him.

Apparently she'd done the same thing to Emmett when he got back from UW yesterday, according to Alice's whispering on the side of me. It was really obvious how much Esme cared for her kids, even though Alice and Emmett weren't biologically hers; she never treated them any different than Edward; besides the fact that she constantly tries to baby him. He always says that he can take care of himself, but I know he loves it when she does it.

We talked briefly of Rosalie, too. She was also going to University of Washington studying to be a pre-school teacher, while Emmett has been there to become a personal trainer. It was definitely something I saw Emmett doing, it fit him.

The first day we'd got in a little late, so we enjoyed talking with Esme while she prepared dinner, talking endlessly about school and how everything had been going. She didn't say a word about my father or anything of that sort, for that I was grateful.

After dinner Esme showed me my room and I got to unpack my things. It was dark out, and I was tired after the flight; so immediately after I had gotten most of my things put away in drawers, hung up, in the bathroom or onto of the dresser; I was getting ready for bed and prepared for sleep. I flipped on the television to some television show, nothing in particular; but just a quiet noise to help fall asleep. This mattress was about one hundred and fifty percent nicer than the ones at the dorms. It felt like forever since I'd slept on a bed this nice.

Just as I was drifting off, the bedroom door opened and closed. I rolled over and yawned, burrowing into the soft purple covers. And then I felt a familiar person behind me, kissing my neck and my cheek softly.

" Edward, you can't be in here. You're mom sai-"

" Whatever happened to badass bitch Bella?" he whispered.

I smiled and felt him thread his fingers through mine. " I know, but she said-"

" Shh, go to sleep, baby. Don't worry about anything."

" If she gets angry you get to deal with it." I mumbled tiredly.

He slithered under the sheets and moved until he was on top of me, still covered up by the thick comforter. Both of his hands grabbed my wrists to hold them in place by my sides and he leaned forward, kissing me once and then twice.

" You talk way, too, much."

I turned my head, " Not here, Edward."

" Nobody can hear us." he whispered, licking and kissing my neck, moving his hands purposely down my body and gripping my thigh, hooking it over his hip and rocking his body into mine. I wouldn't fucking lie, being pressed against Edward like this and being able to feel _everything _was a big turn on, and I wanted to take it further...

" It's not right. I won't disrespect them after they let me stay here, Edward."

He sighed, " Okay, okay...I'm going back to my bed, sweetheart. Feel free to sneak in anytime tonight."

" Mm, don't leave, Edward." I sighed, gripping onto his hands.

_" _Weren't you the one telling me we shouldn't?" he whispered

I shoved him towards the edge of the bed, " Fine, get out already. I'll see you in the morning."

Edward reached behind me and grabbed a huge handful off my ass, squeezing the flesh before kissing my forehead and running from the room. I rolled my eyes and curled up against the pillow next to me, falling into a deep sleep.

~\\~

" Ow, ow, who's fine ass is that cleaning my pool out? Couldn't possibly be Isabella Swan, local badass, is it?"

I rolled my eyes and turned around to see Emmett standing on the deck in a pair of plaid shorts and an Abercrombie t-shirt that was snugly fit to his torso, like most of his shirts he wears. Edward put the bottle of cleaner down and set his sunglasses on top of his head, glaring at Emmett.

" Don't you have your own girlfriend's ass to look at?"

Emmett whistled, " This is true, but Bella's ass is just a little more-"

" Can we stop talking about my ass?"

He busted out laughing and jogged towards the house, and Edward rolled his eyes and put his sunglasses down, turning the music up higher before continuing to scrub the liner on the pool. I bumped my hip against his, spraying more of the cleaning solution on the liner and scrubbing at it until it was perfectly blue.

Carlisle somehow got Edward roped into cleaning out the pool, as well as me; but it was a nice day outside to clean it out and get it prepared for the summer. It was better than sitting inside doing nothing at least, because that got old fucking fast.

" I need a smoke." I said, grabbing onto the pool ladder and hoisting myself up. I looked around as I lit up a cigarette, not wanting to be caught by Esme, who seemed to be lurching around everywhere. The other day she picked up commit mints or some shit, to help me stop smoking.

Apparently a girl as pretty as me shouldn't be smoking. That's according to Esme of course.

" Give me that." Edward said, reaching up towards me as he grabbed my cigarette, taking a long drag from it before giving it back to me.

The rest of the afternoon we finished off cleaning out the pool, all the while Esme bringing out sandwiches and lemonade to keep us fueled up. By the end of the evening, we had rinsed the pool of all the solution we worked on, let it drain out and put the hose in to fill up overnight. Esme thought we did a sufficient job of getting it done, so that was good enough for us. The job hadn't been too awful, but it was pretty exhausting.

Tomorrow we were responsible for setting up the hot tub.

I smiled at the mention of it, and so did Edward. It brought me back to Prom night, and the first time Edward and I had fully experimented with each other. It seemed like such a long time ago, but it was something that I'd surely never forget.

Being prepared was a delicious dinner that was almost finished, and when we had gotten in the house, I came face to face with one of two of my worst nightmares.

Rosalie Hale.

She looked the same, seemed to be acting the same also. I saw her sitting in Emmett's lap at the kitchen table, Esme shuffling around the kitchen to get everything put together for dinner with not even a soul offering to help her. Edward grabbed a drink from the fridge and I leaned against the island in the kitchen.

" Do you need help with anything, Esme?"

A grateful look came upon her face, " Could you put the gravy in a bowl, and set the potatoes on the table?"

" Of course."

Edward grabbed the potatoes for me, setting them on the table while I poured the gravy into the bowl next to the stove where the pot of it was. I was able to find a ladle to put in it and set it next to the potatoes. Rosalie sent me an icy glare as I leaned over to set it down, but I looked past her.

" Hey, Ed, Rose and I rented Day of the Dead and Prom Night. Wanna watch it with us in the basement tonight?"

My eyes flashed over to Edward, who shrugged and had a neutral look on his face. Then I looked over at Rosalie, and saw that she was biting her tongue not to say anything about Emmett's invitation. Honestly, I didn't want to be around her, but it might be fun to piss her off by joining in when clearly she didn't want us to.

" Sure, whatever. Not like we have anything better to do." Edward said, kissing the side of my head before sitting down at the table.

Just then Carlisle walked in, greeting all of us casually before going to Esme and giving her a light kiss on the lips and leaning over her to see what was for dinner. I could smell the delicious barbeque from over here, and I couldn't wait to eat the ribs. She was such an amazing cook, and it was nice to sit down and eat homemade food that I didn't have to slave over and cook all day, or cereal. That was one thing I lived off of at college.

" Dig in, kids." she said, setting it down as Alice bounded into the room, sitting beside me with a bright smile on her face.

As we all got food on our plates, I heard the loud scraping of utensils on a plate and cringed, looking up I saw Rosalie trying to eat ribs with a fork and knife. I attempted not to laugh at her failed attempt, and I felt Edward slid his hand over my thigh, giving it a light squeeze.

After dinner we all helped clean up dinner and put things away, everybody but Rosalie of course. She was too above us to clean a fucking dish; including her own. After cleaning up, Esme set out some fresh peach ice-cream that she made herself for everybody to taste.

It was hands down the fucking best I'd ever had, and I was pretty sure everybody was basically moaning through every single spoonful. Emmett ate enough for both him and his girlfriend who refused to eat it, and I could see the hurt in Esme's eyes when she refused, but we all made her feel better by telling her how good it was. Honestly, the best.

I didn't even have the willpower to say no to her when she offered something; she was too nice and so motherly that it was basically impossible to have the guts to let her down.

" I'm going to grab the movies, I'll be right back, babe. Meet you guys downstairs?" Emmett started.

" Oh! I want to watch, too. Jasper is going to be here really soon."

Esme rolled her eyes at the enthusiasm Alice seemed to munster up as she bounced up and down.

" Whatever you say, Ali." Emmett laughed, jogging upstairs.

Carlisle wrapped his arm around Esme and gave us a stern look, " Don't be getting rowdy, and behave yourselves."

I could hear Edward scoff behind me before he headed towards the basement, dragging me down with his grip on my wrist. Very slowly, Rosalie had followed us downstairs, an uninterested look on her face. Edward pulled me past the bar and sunk down into the leather couch, pulling me close to him.

She took her seat at the way other end, one leg crossed over the other and leaning back. It was too formal.

Girl needed to fucking chill or something.

" So, uh, Rosalie...How's school?" Edward asked, trying to at least be nice and make conversation.

" Fine."

" What abou-"

She cocked her head to the side and gave us an icy glance, " Look, let's not pretend we're friends. We never have been, and we never will be."

" Whatever, bitch." I replied, standing up and walking over to turn the television on to get the DVD player started for Emmett.

" I'd rather be a bitch than a pothead."

I whirled around, " Stop acting like you fucking know me when you don't."

" Bella..." Edward started.

" No, this is fucking catty and pathetic. Just because I wasn't one of the popular kids in school doesn't mean that you are above me on a social status and can treat me like shit like you always have. Do you want to sit and tell me you didn't ever drink before, or maybe even get high? You aren't perfect, so get the fucking stick out of your ass and let's watch a fucking movie without you glaring daggers at me." I finished, and just as I did Emmett jogged down, with Alice and Jasper following behind him.

Jasper said a shy hello to me before sitting down next to where Alice pulled him down to on the loveseat across from us. Emmett put the movie in and Edward got up to turn the lights off, coming back and lying across the couch, putting his head in my lap. I traced his jaw with my finger and playfully tugged on his lip piercings.

" Don't take my lip off." he growled low enough for only me to hear, biting my finger.

I moved my hand away and he reached his hand up and tugged my lip, making me wince and slap his hand off.

" Can't take what you dish out can you, Swan?"

" Shut up, Masen."

He smiled and shifted on the couch, turning his body towards mine so he wasn't watching the television at all, and he pressed his nose against my stomach before sighing and closing his eyes contently.

Moments like these were the ones I lived for.

~\\~

School had been coming to a close for Alice, and all she'd been chattering on and on about was summer. I couldn't count how many times she'd bursted into Edward's room while we were in the middle of watching a movie to tell us yet another plan she had. It was funny really, Alice sure was something else. Her enthusiasm couldn't be matched to anybody, but that's what made her unique

Emmett and Rosalie hadn't been around too much, apparently they preferred staying at Rosalie's place or being out during the day; which obviously Edward and I didn't give a fuck about. Not seeing the Ice Queen wasn't something I was going to complain about. Carlisle was of course working long shifts at the hospital during the day, and Esme was in and out of the house running errands or going shopping.

So until Alice got home, unless she went to a friend's house, Edward and I were basically alone all day.

But today Edward was out with Esme running errands, they hadn't really told me anything about it and I wasn't going to snoop. He'd asked me to go along at first, but when I refused he dragged his mom out; insisting that he needed to go shopping with her anyways. I decided to keep myself busy with baking, which was something I hadn't done in awhile. I'd already finished making red velvet cupcakes with cream cheese frosting, triple chocolate cookies, and my next task was pumpkin bread. The recipe was my Grandma Swans, and I used to make it with my mom all the time when I was younger.

Edward seemed to love Pumpkin Muffins from bakeries, he'd always get one before class along with his usual coffee; so I figured why the fuck not and decided to see if he would like this. Esme had basically everything I would ever need to bake, but I asked her beforehand if I could make some things; I wasn't about to assume just because I was staying here.

As I popped it in the oven and was cleaning off the counters, I heard the door to the garage shut, signaling Alice being home. I could hear her talking to someone, but I could recognize the voice from anywhere.

Leah.

I knew that I'd see her, being Alice's good friend and all; but I wasn't sure if she was upset at me for leaving so abruptly without saying goodbye to her, of course it was my choice but as I've always said; Leah has never treated me indifferently or acted like I didn't exist. She really was like a sister, or a best friend to me.

" It smells like heaven in here!" Alice exclaimed as she dropped her bag on the floor and literally ran towards the plate of cupcakes. Leah entered the room and her eyes brightened at seeing me.

" Hey, Bella." she said, sitting on the barstool of the kitchen next to Alice.

And that was that. We didn't need to explain ourselves. It was just like it had always been.

" Hey, Leah. How was school, guys?"

" Ugh, Finals! I hate them. Where's mom and Edward?"

I shrugged, " Beats me. They left hours ago to some unknown place."

All of a sudden, recognition flashed in Alice's eyes, but she tried to hide it. I looked at her, wondering if she knew where they were. I didn't think much of it now. Were they hiding something?

" Oh, I see. I think mom was talking about forcing Edward to go clothes shopping. She doesn't want Edward walking around looking like a hooligan."

I quirked an eyebrow, " What's wrong with his clothes?"

" Bella, come on; we all totally saw him rip the side of his emo skinny jeans on the ladder in the library. And let's not forget all the holes in all the others. Hell, he was walking around in the kitchen at like three in the morning wearing one of his white t-shirts and they were all worn out. In this house,we all have to look presentable!"

I looked down at my own ripped up skinny jeans, and my plain v-neck fitted t-shirt that had a rip at the hem.

" Except for you, Bella."

I rolled my eyes, " Oh, thanks Alice."

She waved her hand, " No problem. Delicious cupcakes and cookies by the way Bella! Leah and I are off to study for our English final tomorrow!"

" Sure thing, have fun."

" Fun?" Leah scoffed with a laugh, grabbing her bag as Alice skipped down the foyer.

Just as she almost left the room, I said her name. She glanced back at me; almost as if she were surprised I even said her name.

" Is Charlie doing alright?" I asked her, wanting to know more for myself rather than for the sake of him.

She nodded, " Yeah. Not working as much though, my mom put her foot down for once."

" Good." I said.

With a smile she nodded and walked towards the foyer, following Alice upstairs. I finished cleaning up the counters and the rest of the things I had used, and just as I finished the loaf was ready to come out of the oven. While it was still hot, I sprinkled brown sugar over the top, popped it in the oven for five minutes, and then drizzled icing over the top to finish it off before letting it sit on the stove to rest for awhile.

Afterwards I decided to grab a few things to dust the guestroom I was staying in upstairs. I took my time dusting all the wood and my things set on the shelves, and made my completely unruly bed. Edward was sneaking in here at night, but I was pretty sure Esme knew about it at this point.

If she did, she hadn't said anything about it. I was a little happy she didn't, even though I felt bad for not listening to that specific rule. Edward helped me sleep at night, and it made me feel safe falling asleep in his arms, so warm and comforting.

When the dusting was done, I vacuumed and then decided to clean Edward's room also. It was harder and more time consuming dusting off his fuck-ton of CD's, Movies and Books, but it kept me busy until they got back home. I got through everything in his room and vacuumed and by that time it was nearing dinner time. I decided to rifle through the cabinets and fridge to find something to make for dinner because Alice and Leah were also getting hungry.

I whipped up a quick pasta with mushrooms and parmesan cheese melted in with it, along with some chicken and a few good Italian seasonings for added flavor and to make it somewhat edible for them to consume. It only took maybe a half hour to make; and they both seemed to really enjoy it so that was really all that fucking mattered at that point.

" Cleaning and cooking? Who knew!" Alice joked with me as she cleaned off her plate and put it in the dishwasher.

I rolled my eyes, " Shut the hell up."

" You're so adult, too!"

I glared.

" Just kidding! Thanks for dinner, Bella; it was really delicious. Don't tell my mom I said that!"

" I just might." I replied, washing off the table and tossing the rag in the hot bubbly water.

Just as Leah and Alice were heading back upstairs, Esme and Edward had gotten home. I was surprised to see that Alice was actually right, and Edward was carrying like five bags in his arms, while Esme just had one small one for herself. When he saw me, he set all the bags down on the table and wrapped his arms around me so tightly, as if we hadn't seen each other in days. Leaning forward, Edward pressed a long, deep kiss on my lips. I sighed into his mouth, returning his passion and not caring that his mother was standing right there.

" I missed you today." he murmured after pulling away, kissing my forehead and holding me tighter to his chest.

" I missed you, too, Edward." I whispered, not even bothering to question his actions but instead embracing it.

Looking over my shoulder, I saw Esme looking at the things that I had baked today.

" Oh! This loaf smells absolutely divine; what is it exactly Bella?"

" It's pumpkin bread, with brown sugar sprinkled ontop and a little icing."

She smiled at me, " I bet you did that for that boy over there, didn't you?"

I looked up at Edward, " Sure did."

He tucked my bangs behind my ear and pressed another kiss to my forehead.

" Did you guys already eat?" I asked.

" Oh, yes. I hope you had dinner?" Esme said, setting her purse on the counter.

I nodded, " Yeah, I made dinner for Alice and Leah, too."

" Thank you so much, Bella. I appreciate it. Hopefully Alice didn't get too rowdy on you tonight."

" It's no trouble at all. They've been upstairs most the time."

Esme nodded, " Of course. Well, I'm going to head upstairs; it's been a long day. I'll see you kids in the morning."

We wished her a good night and Edward squeezed me tight in his arms before reaching out to grab his bags.

" My god, what did you buy?"

He smiled, " You'll see."

Edward and I headed upstairs, and I was feeling just as tired as he was at the moment. He seemed to notice that his room had been dusted and vacuumed, and of course had to sit and tell me it wasn't my responsibility to do it. Yeah, I didn't give a fuck. He set all of his bags out on his bed, most of the bags almost completely full.

He had gotten all brand new white v-necks, of the expensive Ralph Lauren variety. Along with more of his fitted button downs that he liked wearing; unfortunately due to his super-skinny and tall self it was harder to find ones that were of those two categories but he found a few. And of course he bought like six pairs of new skinny jeans, but Esme got him to buy a few pairs of regular jeans.

When I saw him tucking boxer briefs into his drawers, I popped up behind him with a wicked smile.

" Did someone go underwear shopping with their mommy?" I teased.

" Fuck no. I'm not five. She went into a store while I got this."

I peered over him, reaching forward the touch the interesting extra fabric on the front of the briefs...

" Why do they look so fucking weird?"

" If you happened to have forgotten Bella, I'm a man. I have certain parts of my anatomy to be covered."

" But that extra fabric in the front? Baby, we both know you don't need that."

" Oh you little - " he grabbed onto me and tackled me to his bed, all the while I was laughing.

He tickled my sides, pining me down at the same time, " Take it back before I have to really give it to you." he threatened, his hands poised at my waist ready for more.

" Never!"

Edward attacked me again with his hands, and I yelled and kicked, trying to get him off of me. Finally he relented after I basically begged for mercy and told him that I took it back. He took his hands off, but continued to straddle me so I was unable to get up.

" So now do you understand my goddamn underwear?"

" I mean, if you think you're really packing, why didn't you just get really big boxers?"

He rolled his eyes, " You're fucking ridiculous. And why not? I'd rather have everything on display for my lovely girlfriend for her viewing pleasure."

I rolled my eyes and shoved his chest, pushing him back down onto the mattress before hopping off of it. Next to one of his bags, I spotted another one that was blue, and it was smaller than the rest. It was a familiar turquoise blue, but I couldn't pinpoint where it was from; but I knew it. Reaching over I went to grab it but Edward was behind me with his arms around my waist before I could even touch it.

" Mm, what are you doing?" he murmured, kissing the side of my neck softly.

Yeah, he was trying to distract me for some reason...

" You have another bag here. I didn't see it."

He turned me around in his arms and placed a soft kiss on my lips, slowly deepening it and taking my breath away. I twisted my fingers in his hair, every thought I had before flying out of my head. He brushed the bags off the bed and laid me over it, never moving his lips from mine. I lightly bit his top lip and he drew me even close to him, his tongue stroking against mine leisurely.

As I felt his hand sneak under my shirt, my mind flickered back to that other bag he had. Before I could pull him away and really interrogate him about it; the door to Edward's bedroom flew open and I heard a loud voice squeal 'Ew!' really loudly. Edward turned his head to the side and glowered in the other direction, his jaw next to mine so I was unable to move.

" Can I help you, Alice?"

" I just wanted to borrow a movie?"

Edward sighed and fell back onto the mattress, laying next to me. He wrapped his arms around my waist and kissed the side of my neck, curling up against me so tightly I was sure I couldn't move if I wanted to.

Alice skipped into the room and to the shelves on either side of Edward's bed, rifling through all of the million movies he owned.

" I'm pretty sure mom would kill you if she saw you two making out in here." Alice said.

" That's why you aren't going to say shit about it."

She smiled, " What's in it for me?"

Of course...

" Why do you have to be such a brat, Alice?"

" I am no-"

Edward scoffed, " You so fucking are. Are you really going to barge into my room without knocking, and then make comments about me spending time with my girlfriend and then take one of my movies? Just leave, Alice. And feel free to tell everybody about it."

Without a word she glared at him and spun around to leave the room, slamming the door behind her. I peaked up at Edward, who was leaning over me and basically fuming. I ran my hands down his back and kissed his cheek softly.

" It's okay." I assured him, peppering his jaw with kisses before finally pressing our lips together for just a moment, " I love you."

" Love you, too." he sighed before rolling over off of his bed to grab his bags from the floor. I curled up against his pillow, breathing in his deep scent.

About five minutes later Edward finished messing around with the bags, he sat at the edge of the bed and reached into his drawers to take his pills, looking back at me.

" Remember our first date. We came back here and watched Pirates of the Caribbean."

I smiled at the memory and nodded, " I do. I also remember you asking me if I was yours."

He rolled his eyes, " I was so fucking cheesy. I was already just so helplessly in love with you I couldn't stop myself from acting like an idiot."

" You were fucking adorable." I said, slipping out and grabbing the remote to the television, putting on a television show that both Edward and I could enjoy.

After taking his pills, Edward changed into a pair of sleep pants and laid on the bed next to me, to which I moved to lay my head on his chest. I twisted the hem of his shirt with my fingers, absentmindedly placing small chaste kisses over his heart, too.

" Can I stay with you tonight?"

" Mhm." he hummed against the top of my head.

" You think Alice told your mom?"

He shook his head, " No, usually when I tell Alice about something she does and doesn't like to be confronted about it negatively, she shows me the exact opposite."

I closed my eyes and smiled, moving up more to rest my head in the crook of his neck. He kissed the bridge of my nose and brushed his against mine, holding me closer to him.

" I love you so much." he murmured sweetly.

" I love you, too, Edward. More than anything."

Releasing me for just a moment, Edward grabbed the thick gold blanket at the end of his bed and brought it up around us. I wiggled out of my jeans and pulled it over my cold bare legs, turning towards Edward to resume our position after he flicked off the lamp that was on in the bedroom so now only the television provided light.

" Warm enough?" he asked, pulling the blanket tight around me.

" Mhm." I sighed against his neck, bringing my left arm up to wrap around his neck and let my fingers run my fingers through his hair. It was only moments later we fell asleep wrapped in each other's arms.

~\\~

" Hey! Time to get up lovebirds, it's actually sunny outside today!"

A body rolled over on top of me and I felt all the air leave my body before I could recover. I could feel Edward's warm breath against my neck, and I also felt another part of his anatomy also very awake this morning unlike the rest of him.

" Fuck, Ed, don't crush the pretty lady now!" Emmett boomed, shoving Edward roughly to the other side of the bed, off of me, and startling him awake.

" What the fuck?" he yelled in surprise, sitting up as his chest heaved frantically.

Emmett laughed, " Dude, you were smothering your poor girlfriend. I just came in here to tell you guys Rose and I are going to the beach because it's fucking sunny and hot out for once. Then I saw you roll onto poor Bella and she looked like she was turning purple."

I rested my hand on Edward's knee and he rubbed his hands over my face.

" Well that's great, thanks for giving me a heart attack."

" Anytime!" he said, shutting the bedroom door.

Edward looked over at me and brought his hand up to my cheek, leaning forward to give me a chaste kiss. " I'm sorry I crushed you."

" You're fine; no crushing." I assured him, kissing him once before laying back against the pillows

" He's such an ass." Edward grumbled lowly, laying back down and wrapping his arms around the pillow next to him.

I smiled and moved to rest my head on the pillow he held.

" Wanna go with them?" I asked him.

He sighed, " Fuck, why not? I wouldn't miss seeing you in a bikini for anything."

I shoved his shoulder and slipped out of bed. I yanked my jeans on and walked down the hallway towards the guest room. Just as I was opening the door, I saw Esme at the end of the hall, eyeing me. And I knew that at that moment we didn't even need Alice to rat us out.

I'd done a good job of that myself. For a moment I paused and gave her an apologetic look. She gave me a smile though, a knowing smile that told me that it was alright. I slipped into my room and locked the door. I brushed my teeth and tossed my hair up in a messy bun before going into the bedroom and looking for my bathing suit. I decided to wear the white one from last year, because Edward fucking loved it, and I actually hadn't worn it too much last year so it was still in great condition.

After slipping it on I put on a pair of shorts and a light hoodie. Then to just brighten my eyes a little bit, I put on some waterproof mascara and waterproof white eyeliner on my waterline. When I was finished getting ready and packing a few things in my bag, I headed downstairs and saw Edward heading out to the garage so I followed him out.

Rosalie was leaning against Emmett's jeep while he packed a cooler in his trunk. He smiled when he saw us.

" Awesome of you guys to join. Alice and Leah are meeting us up at the beach at around two with Jasper, and uh, I believe Tanya and her boyfriend are going to show up sometime."

An idea popped into my mind and I smiled, " Hey, mind if I invite two of my friends? Haven't seen them since I left."

Angela and Jess, even though we didn't talk all too often, we still kept contact and we were still friends and talked as much as we could with our schedules. I talked to Jess more often than Angela, because Ange was really working herself to the bone these days. They'd just finished up the last of their finals for high school two days ago, earlier than the rest of the classes, and were graduating somewhere around the fourth of June.

" Yeah, awesome, the more the merrier!"

Rosalie scoffed and rolled her eyes, obviously not satisfied that I was going to be inviting people. But if she wanted to invite Tanya, then I could invite my fucking friends so I wouldn't have to deal with that fake bitch.

While we drove out to La Push, I gave Jess and Angela a call, who seemed very excited to hear from me and both of them were actually able to come out to the beach with us, and Ben was going to be with Angela also. It was no surprise that they were still together, Angela and Ben had always had a good relationship, and everybody knew that they would be married in a few years to come.

At the beach, there were actually not many people there, and school got out today so I was sure later on it would be pretty packed. We were setting up near the pier where people fished, and when we arrived I saw my worst fucking nightmare already there.

Tanya Denali.

**Authors Note- Hey guys, so I'm sorry the chapter is a day late. Friday turned out to be an especially busy and never-ending day what was completely unexpected. But it's only a day, that's better than a week!**

**I sent out all review replies to you guys, I can't express how happy I was to sit down and do that because it's been awhile. If anybody didn't receive one, then that's only because they don't have Private Messages Enabled, but everybody that could receive one sure did get one!**

**Next chapter is actually done, but I want to let you guys know that this month is going to be a little busy for me, but by the end of the month and by June, I'm hopefully going to have a steady schedule. So, yeah! I'm done ranting.**

**REVIEWS get TEASERS and all that fun stuff! So get on it, kids!**


	33. Summer Nights

**Authors Note- Live it up and say goodbye to fluff after this!**

**Disclaimer- S. Meyer owns all things Twilight.**

**Chapter Song- Summer Nights by: Rascal Flatts**

~\\~

BPOV

~\\~

The first thing I noticed about her was that she got Botox or some shit in her lips, and they weren't exactly done by a professional it looked like. And her hair was the same bleach blonde color, with dark red highlights in it. But the rest of her looked like the same bitch I knew for so many years.

Next to her was some guy who I didn't at all recognize. He had dark, almost jet black hair and he had really tanned skin to go with it. Surprisingly though, he looked like an average guy, but I knew that something must be wrong with him if he was really putting up with Tanya, or the guy was really patient...or very, very stupid. I didn't honestly care as long as he distracted her from Edward, but I didn't miss the way her eyes brightened when she saw him; but significantly darkened when she saw me.

" Edward! I didn't know you were going to be here. It's so awesome to see you!" she basically squealed.

Just as she went to walk up and give him a hug, Edward wrapped his arms around my and pressed his lips against the top of my head, which made her stop and give a bright smile instead.

" Oh, and of course, Bella. How could I forget?" she said, and I could sense the underlying bitter tone in her voice.

I smiled, " Who's this here with you?"

The guy's eyes turned on me, and they were a light green color. He smiled when he saw me, a blinding white fucking smile that belonged on a toothpaste commercial, and he reached his hand out.

" Hey, I'm Ryan, it's nice to meet you."

I took his hand and he started shaking mine firmly, a little too firm. " I'm, Bella. Nice to meet you, too."

He shook Edward's hand, to which Edward glowered at him and repeated his name before Ryan went to say hello to Rosalie and Emmett. He seemed like a really enthusiastic person, but not weird...

" He seems too normal." Edward whispered in my ear as I chuckled quietly. He nipped my neck before pulling away and helping Emmett out with the cooler. Rose was off to the side talking to Tanya, smiling and laughing and stealing glances in my direction every few seconds.

I slipped off my hoodie and put it down on the towel Edward had laid out in the sand. I was just about to turn around when he had come up behind me and touched my waist.

" You're dad is up on the pier." he whispered in my ear closely. " He was looking at you."

My body froze slightly and I shifted my eyes in the direction, trying not to move my head too much.

And Edward had of course been right, my father was up on the pier, sitting in a lawn chair and fishing. Next to him was Billy Black, a long time friend of his who was a paraplegic since he had gotten in a car accident with his wife, luckily his wife had been alright, but he's been in a wheelchair ever since. I'd basically grew up on the reservation when I was younger because our families would get together, and when Billy and my father had gone fishing I'd play on the beach with my mom and Billy's wife, Sarah. The memories were still vivid in my head like they only happened yesterday.

I hadn't seen Billy since my mother had left, but he appeared to look the same. He caught me glancing at them, and he seemed to have recognized me immediately upon one glance/

Charlie looked the same; like that bullet had never almost killed him. I drew my eyes away and Edward wrapped his arms around me securely, kissing my cheek softly to soothe and comfort me.

" Don't let it ruin our day, baby. I love you."

" I love you, too."

He pulled his ray bans down from his head sat down in the sand, wearing his swim trunks and a white wife beater, which he swiftly tossed in the sand and threw me suntan lotion; giving me a wicked smirk as he did so.

" Would you mind?"

" It would be a pleasure." I purred, pushing him down onto his back over the towel, not caring whoever saw. I squirted the cool lotion into my hands and rubbed it over his chest, the ridges of his abs and over his scar. I rubbed it in evenly before putting more in my hand, taking one of his arms to rub it thoroughly into his skin. Afterwards he sat up and I rubbed it over his shoulders and back, making sure to use plenty so he wouldn't burn. Being so pale he was probably really prone to it.

" Now it's your turn."

" I can get the fro- or not."

He was already slathering up his hands and rubbing it into my chest more thoroughly than even necessary as I rolled my eyes. He went onto my stomach than, and my arms and then my back, slipping his hands underneath the straps to also apply lotion there. Once he was finished I grabbed the bottle and finished up with my legs and then grabbed a book that I had stored in my bag. I always used to love reading on the beach when I was a kid, I hadn't done it in awhile.

I settled in with my book and Edward laid next to me, his arm wormed under my stomach so his hand could graze my heated back. The sun was extremely hot today, and I couldn't remember the last time we had such a hot day in this area.

" Going to read this whole time?" he asked.

" Mm, no. Why?

" Just asking."

I leaned over to kiss him softly, tucking my fallen bangs behind my ear as I did. He tightened his arm around me and sighed contently into my mouth, lightly nipping my lip with his teeth.

" Hey, Edward, stop making out with your girlfriend and join Ryan and I!" Emmett shouted.

Edward pulled away from me and I smiled at him, encouraging him to go have fun with them.

Once he left I went back to my book, and to my right I could hear giggling and talking coming from both Tanya and Rosalie. I glanced over and saw them leaning over magazines and pointing to things, every few minutes flickering their eyes to the boys. It didn't escape my notice how Tanya looked at Edward; but it sickened me to no end.

Tanya caught me looking and sent an icy glare in my direction so I turned my attention back on what I had been doing.

A few minutes after I heard Angela, Jess and Ben get here, and Jess basically threw herself at me in a hug, chanting how much she missed me while Angela laughed and set her towel down, leaning over for a less enthusiastic hug, laughing quietly.

" Oh my god, I've missed you." Jess sighed, " However I did not miss the dynamic bitch duo."

I rolled my eyes and Angela laughed at Jess as she grabbed her suntan lotion.

" How's school been going for you guys." I asked.

" Boring." Jess said just as Angela and Ben said, " Great."

I laughed, " Yeah, figures for you, Jess. You guys all staying at home for the entire summer?"

Angela nodded, " Unfortunetly. My dad is like patrolling my room when Ben is over. Apparently he thinks I'm still in high school and need to be watched."

" So, you've been staying at the Cullen's, huh, Bella? Damn, Edward is looking as fine as ever!" Jess gossiped as I reached over to slap her arm.

" Lay off, Stanley. And, yes, I have been. In a separate guest room of course."

The girls both gave me a knowing look, and Ben just shook his head at them.

" Separate rooms doesn't mean you aren't sneaking into eachother's beds now does it?" Angela asked.

I shrugged, " What Esme doesn't know won't kill her."

For awhile us girls laid in the sun and talked, and Ben went to go join the guys in their game. Angela and Jess both talked a little bit about school; and we also got to hear about Jessica's little rendezvous' with her recent male suitors. Luckily I was able to have conversation with Angela about actual relationship guy things. Things with her and Ben were going really well, and I wasn't surprised.

She even dished out that she was no longer of the innocent virgin variety. Jess had completely freaked out at this, making jokes about her being the ministers 'naughty' little girl. It was pretty funny, but I was a little surprised because Angela seemed more of the type to wait until marriage. Apparently it was a pretty new thing though because she'd only did it once.

" What was it like with Edward the first time?" she asked curiously.

I wasn't completely open about talking about things like that, but I really missed talking to them about girl things and it felt nice because I couldn't exactly talk about sex with Edward to Edward. That would just be weird.

" Awkward, and it hurt, but I never regretted it. It was the night before he left, and I kind of insisted we do it…It definitely was nothing compared to how it is like…now…but he made me feel loved and he was very careful. That's what really mattered."

" That's how Ben was. He was totally sweet about everything which just makes it feel better."

Jess sighed, " I'm jealous. My first time the guy didn't even notice I was in pain. It sucked. But I'd actually much rather hear more about, ' how it is…now'? Hm, Bella?"

I shook my head, " I only said that to Angela to let her know how it was for me. I don't need to divulge how things are in my life now."

" Come on, Bella!" Angela cried.

Rosalie and Tanya glared at us and Angela glared back at them before turning back to me with pleading eyes.

" Okay, fine. Well, Edward actually wanted to wait when we got back together after all of it. Seriously, we haven't actually started to do anything until I was back here when my dad was shot. Remember?" They nodded, " Yeah, well, we were in the hotel room the night before leaving and it just kind of…happened. It was kind of weird because we hadn't been together for awhile, but after the first few times its honestly perfect."

Jess laughed, " I thought you'd be one to like it rough."

Edward collapsed on the towel next to me, taking us completely off guard. He was dripping wet and his hair falling in his eyes from being weighed down with water.

" What about liking it rough?" he asked with a chuckle.

" Nothing!" I said quickly.

" Bella was just telling us how you guys like to make sweet, sweet love. I just thought Bella would be more of a rough kind of girl."

He looked up at me, " Sweet, sweet love?"

I glared, " I didn't say that!"

" She's lying to you girls, don't be fooled. She is much more wild than she makes it seem like, hm, love?"

" Edward, don't encourage them. Do you really want me to tell them all the details on our sex life?"

He laughed loudly, " Fuck no, but isn't it like a normal girls to like…I don't know, talk about fucking size and how good or bad it is?"

" See Bella, Edward gets it!" Angela said.

I rolled my eyes, " Moving on, is the water nice today?" I asked.

" Mhm, you should join me." He said.

All of a sudden he got up and swept me in his arms, taking me by surprise. I put my arms around his neck not to fall and he chuckled at my quick reaction.

" I need to take my shorts off, Edward." I laughed, making him set me down.

I took my shorts off and tossed them onto the towel, and right as I did Edward lifted me up again and basically ran to the water. Before I could open my mouth to even scream or make a noise, the water hit us and we were enveloped in it. I came up and took a deep breath of air, and I placed my arms around Edward's neck, holding him close to me in the water.

The water wasn't too warm; it was the perfect cold temperature to be refreshing.

" Have I mentioned before how much I love that bathing suit?"

" Only about every time I wear it."

He kissed a water droplet from my shoulder and I lifted my hands up onto his shoulders, pushing him down into the water to dunk him. He was quick to get up and shove me under, and I splashed the water in his face and dove underneath the water.

When I came up I heard screaming, and saw Emmett lifting up Rosalie as she flailed and kicked at him to let her down. Oh, and he let her down alright.

In the water.

She came up spluttering and punched his arm, yelling at him for being such a 'jerk' and that he was ruining her makeup by dunking her underneath. I could see slight mascara trails going down the outer corner of her eyes, and back towards land I could hear Tanya yelling at Ryan not to do what Emmett did to Rosalie

Who the fuck puts on a whole bunch of makeup at the beach anyways?

I saw Angela and Ben jump into the water, enjoying themselves, laughing and having fun. Jess decided to work on her tan so she was reading a book and laying on her stomach.

I floated onto my back and looked up at the sky, feeling my hair lightly move in the water underneath me. Every few seconds I could feel Edward swim underneath me, grazing my back and making me smile. It was so peaceful and warm out here, and it was so rare to have a sunny day like this.

After spending a good two hours in the water, Leah, Alice and Jasper had showed up, and both of the girls were excited because today had been there last day of school so they were ready to celebrate. I noticed that Alice had brought some plastic utensils and plates, along with some pasta salad, fruit salad and some sandwiches that Esme had sent off with her for us to eat. They were all set in a cooler on top of some ice to stay cold.

I wrapped a towel around me as I got out of the water and said hello to Alice and Leah, and a quiet one to Jasper. I never really knew him that well besides when we worked together, but I'd always really avoided him because of the fact that he was related to Rosalie.

Maybe I was too quick to judge, because he seemed pretty nice, and didn't even really seem to pay attention to Rosalie at all. I wondered if they even had a good relationship family wise, but that wasn't really any of my fucking business.

" Hey, babe, do you have any cigarette's?" I asked Edward, resting my hand on his shoulder.

He walked over to my bag and started fishing around, and I furrowed my eyebrows, until I saw a familiar pack of Marlboro's. He lit it up, took a drag and handed it to me. I sat down in the sand and enjoyed it until I hit the filter. I buried it in the sand deep and laid back on the towel, just as I was closing my eyes I felt a plate sit on my stomach and I sat up, seeing a little bit of fruit and pasta salad on opposite sides of the plate. Edward handed me a fork and I thanked him and started to eat. I didn't notice how hungry I was until I started eating.

I don't know how Esme managed to do it, but everything I'd ever consumed that she made was always just delicious. She managed to make the fruit marinate in a light juice, but it still was firm and held it's shape instead of getting mushy like most, and the pasta salad was perfect of course.

Jess and Angela also loved the pasta salad, it really was the best and it was the perfect food for the beach. It was filling without being a heavy meal, which was great.

By the time the plate was empty I was full and ready to swim some more.

I stared up at the high cliffs and my mind went back to when I was fifteen and sixteen. James and I would come out here and cliff dive, and sometimes meet up with some of the guys on the reservation. I used to always go on the lower cliff, and James would relentlessly tease me that I was too scared to go on the top one, until I did it once and freaked the hell out of him.

I was able to hold my breath for a really long time underwater, so because he teased me about not doing it; I taught him a lesson. He ended up jumping in after me and I broke the water before he went looking for me; laughing at the panicked expression on his face because it was pretty fucking hilarious.

Needless to say he never made me do it again.

I stood up and started making my way towards the other side of the beach. I knew that neither Angela nor Jess would ever dare go cliff diving, both of them were terrified of heights. Behind me a few of them were asking me what I was doing, and Edward jogged after me, putting his arm around my waist.

" Where are you going?"

I pointed up to the cliff, " Cliff diving. Want to do it with me?"

He shook his head and pulled me to his chest, " No fucking way you are doing that. Fuck no."

Emmett ran up behind us and smiled, " What are we doing, kids?"

" Cliff diving, wanna come?"

" Up there? Are you fucking kidding me? Hells yeah! Let's do this."

Edward held me tighter, his eyes looking deep into mine and he almost looked a little terrified. I felt bad, and for a moment I almost backed down; but it wasn't like anybody was going to get hurt. I'd done this a million times in my life.

" Edward, don't worry." I assured him, kissing his jaw reassuringly.

His hands held mine and he gripped them tightly, giving me a look that if anything happened that he'd bring me back to live and kill me himself for scaring him so fucking badly. I pulled my hands from his and saw his pleading gaze once more.

" Bella, please..."

" I'll be fine. Emmett's coming with me anyways. Sure you don't want to?"

" I can't."

I narrowed my eyes at him, " Why?"

" My heart condition. I can't do big drops like that, I'd probably kill myself."

" Well wait for me, okay? It'll take us a few minutes to get up there but wait, okay?"

Edward looked over at Emmett, " Watch out for her."

" Will do. Let's go, Bella!"

With that Emmett and I broke out in a run towards the trees. Once we reached the edge we started heading up the steep cliffs, and luckily Emmett was nice enough to grab my hand to pull me over the fallen trees, laughing every time I tripped on a branch.

" Now I know why Edward loves you, you're a trip Bella! Literally."

I rolled my eyes, " Thanks, Emmett."

He chuckled for a moment before his eyes got serious and he slowed down to a walk so that I could keep up. He was a pretty quick walker, and in these woods it was hard to keep up with because of all the fucking fallen shit everywhere.

" That kid really does love you. He's been through a lot, I'm glad he has someone like you. Edward might not be my real brother but he really deserves someone good after all the shit he's dealt with."

" Thanks, that means a lot."

" And I'm sorry I've never really taken the time to hang with you guys. Usually I'm with Rose, and she doesn't...She's really resistant to hang out with you guys as you know. I don't know why she won't give it a chance."

I looked over at Emmett and saw the confused expression on his face. I don't think I'd ever tell him what Rose and Tanya did to me because I didn't want to become between both of them. It wasn't my place to do that.

" Rose and I went to the same schools growing up our entire lives. For some reason she's never liked me, and I'd never did a single thing to her. I think it was because you know, she has money and my family isn't rich. She's made it clear that anybody beneath her on the social ladder isn't worth her time."

" Don't get me wrong, I love her; I just wish she'd give people a chance sometimes. Especially Alice, Edward and Esme. I mean, she blatantly ignores all of them...And they're probably the most good-hearted people I know; and it hurts Esme's feelings a lot. She's like my mom, and I hate that she does that."

I was surprised that Emmett was opening up to me like this because we'd never really talked before, but I was glad he could talk to someone about it. He was just as clueless as to why Rose acts the way she does as I was.

" I don't know, to me she is like the perfect girlfriend; a little demanding sometimes but I love her more than anything. I just hope she'll warm up to everybody eventually. She's the girl I want to marry."

I smiled, " I'm sure eventually she'll get it, Emmett. Now, you ready?"

We had passed the smaller cliff and now we stood on the peak of the highest one. Down directly were sharper rocks just about two and half feet sticking out from the wall at the bottom and on this one it was a run and jump so it was safer for cliff divers. Dropping straight down would probably end you up dead.

Emmett looked out, and we could see everyone on the beach but they looked smaller. Edward was standing right where I'd left him, and Emmett and I waved and glanced down. He was looking a little bit nervous.

" Run and jump out so you don't hit the rocks. It's honestly fucking awesome once you do it."

" You don't want to go first?"

I laughed, " Nah, this is all on you. Go for it."

" Awesome...And, Bella? Thanks for listening to me; it's kind of nice to have someone to talk to about it who won't sit and tell me to just break up with her."

I shrugged, " No big deal. Now go!"

He smiled and stepped back a few before running off as quick as he could. He yelled out as he jumped out into the wide open air, falling quickly towards the water.

There had always been a part of me that automatically knew Emmett was a good guy because of how he acts, and the way he carries himself so surely. That part believed that Rosalie didn't really deserve it and I wondered how he put up with it. But maybe that's what she needed, because they really did love each other. Maybe his spirit could eventually bring up her non-existent one, but honestly, nobody knew how Rosalie really was with Emmett alone. Apparently the person she was with him was someone worthy of many someday being his wife.

I waited a few minutes after Emmett jumped to do it myself.

I stepped back to a tree and then ran at full speed forward. When my feet hit the edge I pushed out and put my arms in front of me in a dive. It was exhilarating, and it felt so good to feel the air hit my skin and the sun warm me. Everything was so familiar, yet new.

Before I could fully enjoy the freeing feeling of falling from the tall cliff, I hit the water with my arms first and then my head before I was completely submerged. I waved my arms above until I broke the surface and took a deep breath, smiling from the thrill of it all.

I stayed for a moment in the water before heading back to the shore so I wouldn't freak Edward out any longer. He became clearer as I got closer, and I could see the crease between his eyebrows and smiled. He was always worrying about something.

As I got closer Edward was walking out into the water, and we met when the water was just above my knees and he put his arms around me.

" Don't do that again, please?"

I laughed and walked us backwards for a moment until I pushed him backwards and he fell in the water, but it wasn't deep enough for him to be submerged. He sat in the sand, the water covering him to just above his belly button. I laid in the water, feeling it lap up against me up to my ears before spreading back towards the ocean and repeating.

Edward did the same, his hand linked through mine as we stared up, content in the silence around us.

" We need to go to the beach at least once in New York." Edward said.

" We will." I assured him.

As the sun started to set, the air grew cold and everybody left the water. I put my shorts and hoodie back on to keep warm, and Edward layered his hoodie over me, too. We'd all went to gather some wood to build a fire, and as I carried the last bit to the makeshift bonfire; my eyes went up to the pier. I'd completely forgotten about my father in this time, and when I looked up I noticed that he was gone. Of course he was. I didn't know what I expected.

Edward grabbed his lighter and immediately the wood lit up in flames. He set our towels closer to the fire and he pulled me down into his lap and put his arms around me. I leaned back into his chest, resting my head on his shoulder as he held me. Jess was on my right and Ben and Angela on my left.

" We've got stuff for S' Mores!" Alice exclaimed as she plopped down next to Leah, who was right next to Jess.

" Ew. I don't see why people eat that, it's just so messy and gross." Tanya whined.

" They're good, baby." Ryan said, grabbing a stick from Alice.

" I'm not kissing you after you eat that, you better think twice."

He rolled his eyes and I reached over to take one from Leah. She put a marshmallow on the end and I put it over the fire as Edward leaned to get the graham cracker and chocolate. Angela did the same for Ben as he grabbed a stick.

Once the marshmallow was in fire I let it burn until it was slightly black and crispy. I set it on the chocolate and Edward pushed it down, and the marshmallow was gooey and falling out of the edges.

I took a bite of the delicious campfire snack and then gave it to Edward, who almost swallowed the entire rest of it in one bite. I stole the last bite from him before making another one and giving it entirely to him. I never knew he enjoyed S'Mores so much, but I wouldn't argue. I made one for Jess, who was making a huge mess with burning all of the marshmallows and dropping them in the sand. She glared at everybody for laughing at her.

Everybody, well, almost everybody, talked and laughed freely among the group. Most of us talked about college and our experiences so far. I found out that Ryan was actually already graduated and was a personal trainer; and Emmett really seemed to get into good conversation with that.

Tanya and Rosalie were pretty much talking to each other, giggling and laughing about nonsense nobody was even really paying attention to. Jasper talked a bit about college, he was also going to University of Washington to become a history professor. He went on and on about his classes, but it was really interesting, mostly he loved learning about the wars that we'd been involved in. It was a pretty passionate subject to him, and I'd have never guessed he was such a history buff from what I knew of him.

Besides Emmett, Ryan, Tanya and Rosalie, all the rest of us were talking freely because they seemed to already be in their own little conversation bubbles. Angela and Jess really seemed to mesh well with everybody, along with Ben and the guys. It was kind of nice to see my friends get along with the people that I spent my time with. Jasper also seemed to be more actively into conversation than he had been, and I was sure he'd quickly get into the group.

As a few more hours passed, I had completely wiped out almost completely asleep with my head in Edward's lap, and the fire was slowly calming down. Around me I felt everybody packing up their things, and just as I was drifting further asleep I felt Edward's arms underneath the back of my legs, and then my back. He lifted me up into his arms and I turned my head towards his chest, breathing in the smell of salt water, bonfire and a hint of suntan lotion. I snaked my arms around his neck and he sighed quietly in my ear, kissing the shell of it softly.

" Lazy bones." he whispered to me.

" Mm, never."

I said goodbye to Angela, Jess and Ben, and promised the girls that we would go out shopping or do something one day. I really missed hanging out with them so we were going to make it happen because we missed each other. I never thought it would suck so much going away to school; because even though I didn't want to go to school in Washington and said I wouldn't miss them too much, I really did. I loved Edward, and I could talk to him about anything, but there were girl things that were nice to talk about with friends.

After giving them each a hug I got into the car and lay tiredly against the seat.

He set me in the car and I shook myself awake, moving to the other side of the seat. Edward slid in and shut the door, securing his seat belt.

The half hour drive back seemed grueling, and Emmett dropped Rosalie off at her house and then we headed back to the Cullen's. When we got there the house was pitch black, and it was very dark outside. Alice and Leah were already there though, and they took care of the coolers and food for us. I was grateful for that, because I was fucking wiped.

I stumbled from the car and walked around it to head to the porch. Edward chuckled and held onto me, pulling me down onto the stairs before we got to the door. Emmett headed in and Edward pulled out a cigarette, lighting it up as he placed me in his lap.

" It's cold." I whispered, trying to burrow myself deeper into my hoodie as I sat up, " I'm gonna go in; I'll see you in a bit."

He nodded and I headed inside, enclosing myself into the warm home of the Cullen's house and jogged upstairs to the guest bedroom, or my room.

I started up the water in the shower and stripped out of my clothes. The water really warmed me up a bit, and it was nice to wash all of the salt water and bonfire smell off of me; even though I was basically falling asleep in the shower. Once I was finished I wrapped a towel around me and used another one to towel dry my hair good since I wasn't planning on blow drying it.

Once I was out, I saw Edward in the my bed already passed out asleep underneath the sheets. I put on a tank top and a pair of shorts before slipping in next to him. Taking me completely off guard, he turned over in bed and wrapped his arms around my waist.

" I had a good day with you." he whispered, placing a lingering kiss on my forehead.

I applied gentle pressure with my body against his, and he laid down on the mattress while I laid on top of him, slowly moving on top of him, and I could feel him stir underneath me trying to control himself. I kissed and sucked on his neck, tasting the salt water on him and not caring one bit of the different flavor.

" This your way of showing me you had a good day to?" he grunted, putting his hands on my hips to steady my movements.

I lightly bit his neck and he moaned quietly, trying to push his body up against mine for more friction. I ran one of my hands down his bare chest, lightly scratching the skin like I knew he loved as I continued my ministrations on his neck.

He had his head leaning back into the pillow deeply, moving his hips with mine.

" Bella, I don't think we should..." he argued, but he still never stopped his movements.

I let out a small moan near his ear, which seemed to only spur him on.

" We have to be quiet." I whispered, tracing the silver rims of his helix piercings and giving them a slight tug, " Can you do that?"

" You're a bad girl." he growled lowly.

" Mm, you have no idea."

~\\~

" Mmm, you're always so fucking soft and warm." Edward murmured as he wrapped his arms around me from behind, placing a lingering kiss on my shoulder as a lazy smile spread over my face. I looked over and saw that he was just wearing his boxers, and he smelled like he was freshly showered.

" Why'd you shower so early?"

" I don't think sleep Bella liked the smell of salt water and bonfire smoke. I woke up at like six forty and you were on the other side of the fucking bed, and when I grabbed onto you; you wrinkled your nose up and rolled over."

My arm draped over his chest and I rested my head in the crook of his neck, kissing his clean skin and wrapping my hand around his.

" Well this Bella doesn't care either way." I whispered, feeling his fingers start to run through my hair, grazing down my back and making shivers run up and down my spine just by his mere touch.

I snuggled my head against the pillow underneath me, closing my eyes and hoping for a little more sleep. He moved his hand and pressed his hand against my hip from behind me.

" Can't sleep forever, my love." he sighed.

He placed a few more kisses on my shoulders and the back of my neck before slipping out of bed.

" Let's go out for breakfast, hm? Throw something on and we'll go."

I rubbed my eyes, " Okay." I agreed, sitting up as he left the room and shut the door behind him.

Lazily, I got out of bed and slumped towards the dresser for something to wear. I very quickly pulled on my undergarments and then tugged on a pair of skinny jeans and some socks. As I walked over to the closet to grab a shirt; I heard the bedroom door open behind me and I gasped.

" It's just me!" Alice exclaimed, " No need to freak out, Bella." she laughed, shutting the door.

I stood in only my jeans and bra; covering my chest. It would be weird to be exposed like that in front of Alice; even though I'd known her long enough and she was a girl. Still...fucking weird.

" Did you, uh, need something."

She rolled her eyes at my awkward tendencies and tossed something at me. I caught it and felt soft fabric between my hands. It was a racer back style tank top, and in the back where the racer back style was it was made out of a lacey fabric, but the rest was soft cotton. It had a simple scoop neckline and flowed. The fabric was a charcoal grey color with the words PINK stamped out in black letters on the front. On the side the fabric dropped down to about my waist, so it if worn alone it would be obvious to see my bare back.

" Bought this the other day it looked kind of funny on me; so I figured I'd give it to you! And I bought this with it, so take it!"

Alice threw a small piece of fabric to me that was black, and I was shocked because Alice had a significantly bright wardrobe, I couldn't picture her buying anything in black ever. What she tossed me was a black bandeau top for underneath it. The ensemble looked pretty fucking cute; I'd wear it.

" Thanks, Alice. I appreciate it."

She waved her hand, " No problem. I bet I bought a few more things that fit you and won't look good on me. Actually I just collectively put it all in a bag. So here you go!"

Before I could respond she left a big PINK bag on my floor and skittered away, locking the door behind her. I went to grab the bag and saw more inside of it, one from Dolce&Gabbana and Juicy Couture, Express, Hottopic and American Eagle

My mind went reeling and I knew exactly what this was all about. If it were possible for steam to come out of my ears it would happen. I fought the strong urge to rip the door handle off and tear into Edward's room to really rip him a new one; and I knew he would know how angry I was when I found out about this.

He couldn't possibly think I was stupid enough to think Alice bought this all for herself and it didn't fit or looked good on her. It was bullshit.

All because I told him it wasn't his responsibility to pay for my fucking clothes.

The day he'd gone out shopping he'd originally asked me if I wanted to go because I'd talked about buying summer clothes; but I told him that I didn't feel like spending the money to go out and buy it. When he offered, it was only in my instincts to say no. He was my boyfriend; it wasn't his responsibility to buy me new clothes for the summer season no matter how much I needed it. Of course I let him get a few things for me now and then; but this was different.

And who goes out and buys clothes for their girlfriend without her there?

Esme...

I growled lowly and grabbed a shirt out of my closet, quickly. After tugging it over my head I busted into Edward's room. The bathroom door was closed so I went over and opened the door roughly, hearing it bang loudly against the door stopper and bounce back.

He let out a surprised yell, and he stood in front of the mirror in only boxers with shaving cream on his face.

" What the FUCK, Edward? You really think I was going to buy Alice's little ' Oh, I bought this for myself but it didn't fit', bullshit?"

He set his razor down and gave me an amused look, " Thought we'd give it a shot."

" I don't need you to buy me fucking clothes, Edward. I can take care of myself."

" Bella, I'm very well aware of that. We can go out shopping for you whenever you want - all on you. I just wanted to buy you a few things."

I leaned against the door frame and shut my eyes, trying to keep my frustration at bay.

" I already feel like I'm mooching enough by staying here for free, and then you go out and buy all that for me and it's like I'm doing nothing. That isn't right, I don't deserve all of this, and besides that I can take care of myself sometimes. It makes me feel-"

Before I could say another word he had his hands on either side of my face, pulling my lips to his. The shaving cream all over his face rubbed off on my face, but he didn't release me until he thoroughly assessed my mouth with his tongue, leaving me absolutely breathless until he pulled away from me.

" You're here because I'm selfish and I want you to be here with me. I didn't buy you clothes to make you feel bad, or to make you feel like you can't take care of yourself. I did it because I love you and I want to spoil you."

" I always took care of myself when my mom left, and I just used to it. It makes me feel bad that you spend your money on me."

He chuckled, " Baby, all of the things I bought you didn't even make a significant dent in my bank account."

I wiped the shaving cream that had rubbed off on my face and dabbed it playfully on his nose. He grabbed me once more around my waist and kissed me again, interlocking his fingers together behind the small of my back.

" I love you."

" Don't do it again."

" I won't make promises I can't keep." he retorted.

" Edward..."

" I'll promise something even better." he whispered, pressing his forehead to mine.

I looked at him in question, and he lifted up my left hand, taking it gingerly between his. His finger ran over my promise ring, the one he'd given me before he left. Never once did I take it off my finger, or would even think about it unless I was showering or going to the beach. It meant the world to me, and even when we were going through a hard time it never left.

He promised me that we would be together again no matter what and that he'd love me for the rest of his life. I held onto those promises with everything I had. They were the ones that mattered to me.

" Finish shaving your face. I'll meet you downstairs." I said, letting him cover my face in shaving cream once again before I gave him a swift slap on his ass and shut the door.

**Authors Note- Okay, so this is going to be the last fluffy chapter for a little while now. I think I've way beyond given enough fluff, so much that it's turning me into pure fucking marshmallow; so moving on to crazier things!**

**REVIEWS get TEASERS. If you don't receive a reply from me, then that's because you haven't enabled Private Messages, so get on it if you want teasers my friends!**

**See you guys next Friday!**


	34. Forget About It

**Authors Note- Hello everybody, so I'm sorry the update is two days late. Explanation in the below note if you really care; I'd recommend it because it might affect updates in the future. Love you guys, thanks for sticking with me 3**

**Disclaimer- S. Meyer owns all things Twilight.**

**Chapter Song- Forget About It by: All Time Low**

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BPOV

~\\~

" What would you think about a trip to Chicago?...Visit my dad, meet some of my old friends and I can show you around the city a bit. You aren't the most outdoors-y type girl but I'd love to show you everything."

His finger trailed over my arm, tracing light patterns on the bare skin. I sighed and rolled over, hugging the pillow next to me against my chest.

" I don't have to go with you if you just want to spend some quality time with him."

Edward profusely shook his head, " No. If I go, you go with me. I bet he'd love to see you again, and it wouldn't be as crazy as last time with graduation and all the family around. He was talking to me about it yesterday, I said I'd ask you."

" Okay, if you want to go we'll go." I yawned.

" Are you just saying that because I woke you up?"

I smiled, " Partially."

He leaned forward and kissed my temple, " I'll go with it. Want breakfast?"

" You plan on cooking for me?" I asked him with amused eyes.

Edward rolled his eyes, " I can make breakfast, Bella."

~\\~

" FUCK IT! You make it. You're the woman. You fix this."

I looked around the kitchen, trying to figure out where to start in this entire mess. He had insisted on this whole breakfast in bed kind of thing for me. So I appeased him and laid in bed while he went downstairs. After a half hour I started to wonder, then forty five minutes, and then finally an hour until my stomach was persistently growling and I needed something to eat.

I ventured downstairs to find Edward, and all I really saw was a mess and him right in the middle of it. Pancake batter was spilled, flour all over the counters. I couldn't forget the pungent smell of burnt eggs, I think that's what it was, and the toast in the toaster was a little more than just a light golden brown.

The only thing that looked presentable was the cups of coffee he poured.

" Oh, babe..."

" No...No, no, NO. Don't you ' Oh, babe' me. Just fix it!"

After a long sigh I went to the toaster, tossed out the toast, and then cleaned the pans containing burnt eggs, and burnt pancakes. I wiped down all of the counters and then set everything out and got to work, putting the toast in last because it took the least amount of time, and the eggs and bacon before the pancakes. The only hard part was getting the flour off from the floor and counters; and any other small places it got to because of the little tantrum that my grown boyfriend threw.

I cut some fruit that was in the fridge, and fixed his coffee like I knew he would want it. I took my time buttering and slicing the toast into triangles to make it easier to fit everything onto one plate for him. I put the pancakes in the middle, bacon and eggs on the side and then a bowl of fruit on the side. Of course I didn't forget to put a pad of butter on top of his pancakes along with a little whipped cream.

Once it was all finished I set the plate in front of Edward and he clanked his fork on the plate and looked up at me with incredulous eyes.

" How the fuck do you manage to do this?"

" I just did. Eat up; you get to clean the dishes."

He smirked and grabbed me around the waist. I leaned down to meet my lips with his and his tongue swept over my bottom lip once, twice...until we were making out in the kitchen as if we hadn't seen each other in months. I felt his hands dig into my hips and pull me into his lap, gliding his hands smoothly around them to firmly grab my backside.

I sighed deeply into his mouth and pressed my chest against his, running my fingers through his already messy hair, forgetting all about the hot breakfast I prepared for us.

" Hey! No getting it on in the kitchen. We fucking eat in here, man!" a loud voice boomed.

Edward pulled away from me slowly, lightly biting my bottom lip before I pushed off his lap and stumbled to my feet.

" God, as if I don't hear moaning from your bedrooms, now I have to watch you guys make out in the kitchen."

" I have absolutely no idea what you're talking about." Edward said with a smile, spearing a piece of his pancake into his mouth.

Emmett rolled his eyes and poured a cup of coffee, " Oh, really? I came by your room last night to ask if you wanted to go to the gym with me early this morning, but it sounded like you were getting some pretty good exercise elsewhere; so I just went with my dad."

I blushed bright red and looked down at my plate.

" Oh, fuck! Did Bella Swan finally get embarrassed by something?"

" Shut up, Emmett!" I growled just as Carlisle walked in the room, raising a curious eyebrow.

" What's going on in here?"

Emmett smiled, " Oh, nothing. Just talking to Edward and dear little Bella over here."

As Carlisle poured himself some coffee he looked over at Edward, " You should have come with us Edward. Emmett gives a pretty hard work out."

" Yeah, I think I heard those old bones of yours creaking when you started on the stair-stepper, pops."

He glared at Emmett, " You've worn me out over the years, Em. If you've forgotten, you weren't the easiest child to raise!"

" I'll make sure to pass on going to the gym with you, Em." Edward said.

I laughed, " It's not like you'd ever go alone anyways!"

" That's because Edward has a special kind of daily nighttime exercise, don't you?"

I took a bite of my toast and looked away, but found Carlisle switching his eyes between Edward and I. He might be older than us, but he isn't stupid enough not to get exactly what Emmett had said. Just as Edward had opened his mouth to say something; Esme came into the room with a bright smile on her face.

Somehow she was already up, dressed and completely ready to go, while everyone around here was either in pajama's or workout gear. I took a forkful of my eggs and Edward closed his mouth, obviously NOT wanting to get into this conversation with his own mother. Carlisle knowing was embarrassing enough, but Esme is just too...Esme.

" What about Edward exercising?" Esme said, stopping at the table to kiss the top of her sons head before stepping over to the counters to grab a mug; wrinkling her nose at Carlisle who she obviously wanted to take a shower first before anything.

Emmett stifled a laugh against his hand, but couldn't stop the huge smile that broke out on his face.

" Oh, god." I whispered as Edward tried not to look mortified; hoping she didn't understand or put together the conversation.

" Nothing, mom. Emmett is just picking on me because I don't like to exercise."

" Hey, hey now, Eddie. I was just saying you preferred another kind of exercise than going to the gym."

I knew that if Esme wouldn't have noticed, Edward would be glaring at Emmett hard enough to make him shut the fuck up. Fortunately for us, Esme didn't exactly have sexual innuendos on her mind at the time.

" Oh, Emmett, leave him alone. Edward is very limited in what kind of physical activity he can do. I bet a day at the gym with you would probably kill him, no offense, sweetheart."

" I'm sure he's very limited...Well, off to shower!"

When Emmett left the room I let out a sigh of relief and continued eating.

" Do you exercise, Bella?" Esme asked.

It was the first time I saw Carlisle try not to laugh at an inappropriate innuendo that was still floating around the room. He was usually so uptight, or appearing to be, most of the time. But I saw him smile and stifle a short laugh before covering it up with a cough.

" I'm going to shower, honey. I'll be downstairs in awhile, how about we go out for a late breakfast or early lunch?"

She smiled, " It's a date."

He kissed her cheek before leaving to head upstairs. Edward and I finished our breakfast and put the plates in the dishwasher. I saw him lean against the counter near his mom as she sipped her coffee and looked through a magazine in front of her.

" So, I was talking to dad yesterday and I think Bella and I are going to fly out to Chicago to see him for a few days."

Something flashed in Esme's eyes, and I couldn't explain it but it sparked something inside of me, too.

" Why doesn't he come visit?"

" Because, mom, it's not always comfortable for him to be here. And I can show Bella around where I grew up."

She sighed, " Edward, we should talk about this."

" What's there to talk about? Dad has come here, why can't I go to see him? It's not like I don't know where I'm going."

Why wouldn't Esme want Edward in Chicago with his dad, he was right; he grew up there. There must have been more to the story because I really didn't understand. The tension in the room was thick, and it was enough to want to choke on.

" You know that's not what it is about. We need to talk about this."

" Whatever you want to say to me in private you can say it right here in front of Bella."

I scratched my arm nervously, not really knowing what to say. Obviously this wasn't something I should intervene in, this was between Esme and Edward; but I wouldn't lie and say I wasn't curious as to why she was so resilient to let Edward and I go to Chicago.

" Edward, I don't..."

He sighed, " Just say it."

" I don't want you to get caught up in the kids you used to hang out with before we moved. And this isn't about you going there, Edward; it's Bella, too. I've built up my trust for you, Edward, and so has your father and I don't want you to mess it up if you run into them."

Edward looked annoyed and highly offended by what she said. I could just tell. It was radiating off of him in waves.

" You think I'd put her in a situation like that?"

" I'm not saying that. But the moment we let you up from grounding you after you got arrested for the first time; you were out drinking with those poor excuses of human beings and coming home high in the middle of the night. I don't want that to happen again, sweetheart. I love you. You're so easily swept into the crowd of people, and we don't want to have to do what we did before we moved here."

Arrested? First time? He was arrested multiple fucking times?

And what the fuck did they have to do. I was so confused.

" I know you do, but I put that behind me and I-"

She glared, " Don't you dare think I believe for one minute that you haven't drank since we came here. That boy James next door when you were younger lives here now, too, and trust me when I say he isn't the most well-behaved kid. I've spoken with his mother often."

" Yeah, mom. I got high and I fucking drank just to get drunk; hey, did Bella ever tell you that's basically how we met? Getting high in James' basement and the back of his van at school? We hung out with the same guy, of course I knew him longer though. I bet that really makes you proud."

" Edward, don't you-"

" Nobody is perfect, fuck, Bella was like me and you think that she can do absolutely no wrong. She got fucked up off weed, walking drunk around town without a fucking clue. God, walking drunk inside of her house and all she did was get yelled at, just like things I've done but no; I'm the one who will always go back and do the same thing again."

I went from almost feeling bad, to complete anger within a second. Esme gasped and looked over at me, and I put my head in my hands and sighed. Of course I felt ashamed, this was Esme. She could make you feel guilty about doing something bad without even saying it or looking at you funny. That's just how she was, and she never did it on purpose.

No, I didn't care what the fuck people thought about me, but this was his family. It was hard enough trying to be accepted and then Edward had to go and do this to me. I honestly never thought he'd sit and say it out loud to them.

" Really, Edward? You had to sit there and cheapen our relationship, and say that about me?" I whispered, looking over at him.

Immediately his face flooded with regret, " Bella, no, I-"

" Don't even fucking...No...Nothing you can say could take that back."

I walked through to the foyer, clearly hearing him follow after me but I broke out in a run up the stairs and down the hallway to the guest bedroom. I didn't want him near me; I didn't want to look at him. A part of me knew that I would say something hurtful if he stopped me.

" Fuck, Bella!" he yelled just as I slammed the door and locked it firmly

I leaned against the door as he relentlessly knocked on it loudly. The force of it vibrated against my back, and I turned around and slammed my closed fists into the door, leaning my forehead against it as I breathed heavily.

" Go the fuck away."

" Open the door."

" JUST GO!" I screamed, slamming once more on the door before stepping away and feeling the back of my knees hit the mattress.

I curled up on the bed and covered up with the blankets, hoping that maybe if I burrowed up in it that somehow the last five minutes would disappear.

" EDWARD ANTHONY MASEN!" I heard Esme yell loudly.

Immediately I sat up when I heard her shrill yell. I'd never heard Esme raise her voice before, but I knew that she was pissed; and it was almost terrifying.

" Yes, mother?" Edward yelled back at her. His voice was close to my door, signaling that he never really left; he just shut his mouth.

" You know what, I could sit here and ream you out just for the way you talked to me, young man, but the way you talked about a woman that you claim to love utterly sickens me. Do you honestly think I care what that girl has done, that for one minute I didn't know but never said anything because of how good she was for you? How dare you talk about her like that, Edward; how dare you. I didn't raise you to speak like that to anybody, let alone a lady. Your father would be ashamed of this, you make it look as if you were raised by a pack of animals." she said in a low, menacing tone.

It wasn't exactly low, I was sure everybody that was home could hear it.

" You're right, I'm so-"

" Do you remember what I helped you do the other day? Do you know the reason why? You better fix what you've done or the future you've planned for yourself...it won't mean anything."

I heard steps walking away from the door and I went into the bathroom and slammed the door, starting up the shower. I scrubbed my skin thoroughly, and took my time washing my hair before getting out.

My thoughts were solely focused on Edward, replaying everything that he had said.

It hurt to think that was what he thought about us meeting. Or at least that was what our relationship started and was based on, getting drunk and high. Of course, it was part of my life for awhile; but once I moved to college I grew out of it. I wasn't getting high, and yeah, I drank every once in awhile; that didn't mean that thousands of other college students weren't doing it, too.

And I thought that Edward and I's relationship had moved on from getting fucked up together and making out in a messy basement. But apparently to him that was what it was all about and hearing it really stung. I didn't want him to think that about us; and the fact that he did...

No, I'd never deny that any of it ever happened; but I wouldn't sit and tell someone that I met Edward from a mutual friend and we smoked and got drunk together. The fact that he had to say it directly to his mother made me feel even worse. Of course Esme said she'd never say anything about it, since she obviously knew I wasn't all that innocent, and that meant a lot to me; but it was just the ethics of it all that sickened me.

Maybe I was the stupid one for thinking our relationship went beyond the immature, stupid things that we'd done when we were first together. I didn't regret it because they were things I did with Edward, even though they weren't exactly my proudest moments.

I tried to pry my mind away from the hurt, and I wondered what the hell Esme meant when she said about helping him the other day. I had absolutely no idea what that was about, and the way she talked about fixing this because of his future. Was she under the impression that I would automatically break up with him and just walk out right now?

There were two reasons as to why I didn't even consider it.

Edward meant too much to me, and I know what it's like to be walked out on and I'd never do that to anybody.

And I couldn't actually leave; there was nowhere for me to go. I couldn't very well show up at my dad's and ask for a place to stay; that wouldn't even be an option up for consideration. And I could stay with Jess and Angela for maybe two days, but not long enough to make their parents wonder what was really going on with me. Even though both of their moms clearly knew of my upbringing after my parents' divorce.

I lazily did my hair and just a slight bit of makeup, which was pointless because I only ended up laying in bed and curling up in the covers anyways.

No, I didn't want to fucking sit in here and cry, but a few tears fell because of all the words replaying in my mind. I didn't know how he could possibly stand there and just slander our relationship like that; I'd never be able to cheapen it like he did. Ever. No matter if we broke up or if someone asked me exactly how we'd met each other. And the way he talked about me to his mother made me feel sick. Telling her I'd stumble into my house drunk, and get high...I didn't want that to be spreading about the Cullen's house.

The fact that he so easily panned it out for his mother made me wonder if he actually did think that about me. It so easily fell off of his tongue...like something he practiced saying.

It also flashed through my mind that Esme had mentioned that Edward had been arrested before. This was complete news to me. Of course I knew that Edward rebelled and he was kind of a bad kid in his days, but he'd never told me that he was arrested; and maybe it was stupid for me to think that he should have told me...But wasn't that something you should tell a significant other? I'd never judge him for it, so if he tried that excuse on me when I asked him about it I'd call that fucking bullshit. He knows I'd never sit and judge his life; I'd be one to fucking talk.

I couldn't even grasp why he would keep something like that from me; and it made me wonder if there were other things that I didn't know about; other things that he's hidden from me...

" Bella, please...Baby, let me in; I'm so fucking sorry." I heard from outside the door. His voice was low, almost weak.

Fuck that.

" I was just pissed off at my mom for trying to control what I want to do, but she was right. Look, I haven't told you absolutely everything from my past; but if you open the door I'll talk to you about it. I know that's what's bothering you, too, Bella."

I hated him for knowing me so well.

But I didn't want to open the fucking door.

It was quiet for about an hour and a half, and I couldn't even fall back asleep. I heard tapping outside the door, but I couldn't quite figure out what it was. Edward had been very quiet, but I could see his shadow behind the door as he sat there; waiting. That shadow was there for hours.

" I've been arrested two times, and both of them involved drinking. The first time it was two months before I turned sixteen, and I was walking on the side of the road drunk after being at a friend's house. He took me to the station and I was charged for a first offense, which was a five hundred dollar fine and I had to take eight hours of an alcohol awareness class, and my license was suspended for thirty days. My parents were so angry, and I was grounded for the entire time this was going on, so I was either in school, alcohol awareness of at home studying. That was enough of a punishment for me; I was going insane."

" My second arrest happened about a month and half later, and I was still taking the alcohol awareness classes. But I blew it off one night because one of my good friends at the time was throwing a party. After school was out he'd throw this ridiculous insane party for the end of the year, and everybody would come. It was just like two weeks before I turned sixteen, and he was seventeen at the time. At that point I'd already been heavily into drinking and I was also smoking, but I was also messing around with cocaine. It was fucking stupid...but I was a kid; I thought I knew everything and that nothing would ever happen to me."

I listened to his words closely, and soon found myself on my feet walking towards the door; I slid against the wall next to it and let my hand rest on the carpeted floor below me as I waited to hear his voice again.

" The party was really crazy, and I was drinking a whole fuck-ton and I'd literally smoked like four blunts. Everybody kept going on about how I was still standing. Before we knew it we found out the neighbors called the cops because of how loud the music was, and all the underage kids hanging around outside drinking. His name was Riley, the friend of mine throwing the party, but my other friend Xavier was there, too. When the cops came, it was just usual for us to fucking gun it. Xavier gave me the keys, if it were possible he was more fucked up than me and he basically passed out in the seat. I shouldn't have been driving...I should have told him that I couldn't but I didn't want to get caught by the cops and face my parents. So I drove."

I breathed out a long sigh and closed my eyes, resting my head on my knees.

" I was driving fucking crazy, it was 3AM, and I was so lucky not to have hit anything on my own at that point. But then I remember hearing the police sirens behind me, and when I went to pull over I veered off into a ravine. It wasn't too bad, but it was bad enough. I went right into a tree. I have a scar on the back of my neck from when my head jerked and the seatbelt hit me. It was chipped for some reason and there was a sharp edge. Xavier was alright, just shaken up...But I was arrested for DUI and of course driving past curfew. The DUI was bad enough because I was underage. I remember waking up in a hospital and both of my parents were there. They were divorced by then, and I just remember the look in their eyes; how disappointed. And when they tried to talk to me about it all I would say is that it was because of them, because they divorced. I never took responsibility for it...but a little bit of the reason was that, my mom was dating Carlisle and barely was home; my dad was an hour away..."

He let out a shuddering breath, " I was going to have five years of my license taken away, but somehow my dad was able to make a deal with them and I did community service for an entire year and lost it for two. They also had to pay a four thousand dollar fine. Bella, I promised them that I wouldn't ever pick up a drink again, and I kept that promise. But I didn't for anything else."

" I was hanging out at Riley's and it was the last day of my community service; go figure. And he was going on about how his parents weren't going to be home for awhile and we should celebrate. He'd scored some weed from a new dealer, and I smoked an entire blunt that was laced with PCP. It was really bad, Bella. I tried to get up and literally fell on my ass, and my body kept twitching almost like I was convulsing. Riley had been caught up on the phone, so I smoked it alone. When he got back he started freaking out. I was dizzy and I kept vomiting really badly. There was nothing he could do; he was freaked so he called 911...After that my dad hauled my ass from the hospital to rehab. I'd never stopped smoking weed or doing cocaine every once in awhile after the DUI; hell, I still found ways to do it with them in the house."

Slowly I came to my feet, my hand hovering on the lock of the door. I switched it and opened it up, seeing Edward sitting on the ground next to it, his head in his hands. He didn't move or acknowledge me when I opened the door.

" Carlisle was really hard on me while I was in rehab, because it was also tearing my mom apart; because I blamed her for everything. It wasn't her fault but I convinced her it was. It's one of the reasons why I get so hostile towards Carlisle, and why he tries to get all strict with me. I started rehab before I was seventeen in the spring. At that point I was already diagnosed with the Marfans in the fall. Makenna was way past done with my shit, too. Going off to rehab was the last straw for her basically. I spent my entire summer getting clean."

It was hard to take all of this in, and I couldn't believe that he had kept such a big secret from me. I'd bared everything to him, or all the important things; but this...this was so much to take in and try to comprehend.

" Why did you keep that from me?"

" I'm not proud of it, and I never wanted you to think that I was like that."

" You don't trust me enough to tell me those kinds of things? God, Edward, I thought we were more than just kids who got high together and drank."

He stood up and rested his hands on my shoulders, " We are...I was angry at my mom, and that is absolutely no excuse for it but that's all I can say about it. I never meant it like that, ever. Sometimes she's just so stuck on what I have done that she doesn't think about how things are different and what I can do to make my future better than what it looked like years ago. It makes me angry, and I say things that I don't mean."

" Making mistakes is human, it's what we do. The severity, well that's another fucking story, but it's still a mistake none the less. I thought we could talk about things... but I guess I was really wrong."

" No, you aren't wrong. We all have things in our past we are ashamed about, and I put it behind me because I didn't want to be reminded, I didn't want to bring it up and fuck up what was great for me. And I'm not using that as an excuse, but that was my reason. And I want it to be very clear, that I love you, and what I said to my mom about you...It was so wrong on so many levels that I can't even explain, but I promise that I've never thought of us like that, and I'd never mean to say that."

" You made me feel like our relationship was...Like I was completely in love with you and wanting to be with you for as long as I could, and to you I was just someone to string along to fuck and hang out with. You told your mother that I would come home drunk, and I'd sit and get high with my friends and..."

He pushed us into the bedroom and shut the door, putting his hands firmly on either side of my face.

" I want everything that you want and twenty times more. Bella, I've made it clear you aren't just someone I want to fool around with, that's not what this is. And if it was I wouldn't have waited as long as I did to have sex with you, and I most definitely wouldn't have gotten you this ring that you wear on that finger every single day. What I said...I was an idiot; and I wasn't thinking..."

" I just don't understand why you couldn't tell me."

" I don't completely understand why I didn't it either, but it was a mistake, and I was a coward and ashamed. I didn't want you to think of me as getting arrested and snorting coke...That isn't something that I EVER wanted you to know."

I rested my hands on his wrists and moved his hands away from my face.

" Maybe this was a mistake me coming here this summer."

He shook his head, " No, it wasn't. Bella, please don't be like that."

" Were you ever planning on telling me? Or was it this big secret you wanted to keep forever?"

" It wasn't something that was ever a plan to tell you, or not to tell you. It just never came into conversation, and I wanted to be there for you during your hard times with your dad; not bring mine to the table."

" Don't turn it on me." I said firmly, " That's not an excuse. You sit there and you say awful things about me, keep this huge fucking clusterfuck of a secret... And then try to blame me, and my issues, to try to back it up and justify everything?"

Edward ran his hands over his face, " I'm sorry, and that's all I can say because I can't go back in time and make myself tell you sooner, or take back what I said downstairs. But I'm so sorry, I never wanted to make it seem like I was deceiving you or lying to you or that-"

" You've accepted me for all that I've done, what I've been through and been there through some of it; why wouldn't I do the same for you?"

" I'm not trying to insult you Bella, but dealing with divorced parents and a verbally abusive father who is slightly physically abusive, isn't exactly the same as doing shit like getting arrested, doing coke and going to rehab. It's two different things, Bella."

" I'd always accept you. Why don't you get that?"

" Everybody has fucking insecurities even if they don't want to own up to it."

After standing in the same place for more than two minutes I sat down at the edge of the bed.

" I need some time to think for right now. Maybe I'll call Jess and see if I can crash with her for a few days."

" Don't leave."

I shook my head at him, " I need to clear my mind, because I can't fucking...I can't think beyond the fact that you left such an important part of your past from me and that you could so easily say what you said to your mother about me."

" Fine. Leave. I'll see you whenever." he said, walking out of the room without another word and I heard the slam of his bedroom door, and the sound of it locking.

Without much thought I picked up my phone and called up Jess. Luckily, she picked up and I was able to talk to her. She was hanging out at home, saying how fucking bored she was, so of course she was basically begging me to come stay with her for a few days; her parents never minded when I was over for awhile. It was like a home away from home, and I was grateful to have Jess.

After being grilled about Edward, I finally got her off the phone long enough to pack a few things in my bag. She was right on time because as I zipped up my things Jess called and told me that she was waiting for me outside.

I didn't run into anybody as I left, which was rare to not see at least one Cullen lingering around the house doing something. I locked the door behind me and jogged down the stairs, my heart somehow feeling like I left it there as I walked away. When I got into the car, Jess leaned over the console and gave me a hug.

" Don't worry. We'll call Angela and I've got snacks at my house and we'll just have a girl's night."

I nodded and leaned back in my seat, giving her a quiet thank you. I looked at the clock and saw that it was about four, we got her her house about ten minutes later and I saw, Cara, Jess' mom dusting the foyer. When she saw me she smiled.

" Bella, it's so nice to see you, dear."

" Hey, Mrs. Stanley. How's everything?"

She gave me a knowing look, " I've known you for how long, Bella? Mrs. Stanley is my step-mother. And things have been well, how about you? Jess tells me you've been in New York."

I nodded, " Yeah, I'm at NYC, and my boyfriend is studying at Juilliard."

" Edward it is, right? His mother Esme and I run into each other at the market from time to time, she is such a sweet woman; very nice."

" Yes. I've actually been staying there over the summer."

My mother had always been great friends with Jess and Angela's mom, Cara and Anne. So both of them were very well aware of how things went after my father left, mainly because my mom kept contact with them over the years, and Jess and Angela's houses had been the places I crashed when there was a particularly bad fight with my father. I hated that they knew about it, but it was inevitable

With them here, it made my mom being away easier just a little bit. They were nice, and so open to talk to; very much like Esme. I think that's why I cared for them so much, because they gave me the familiar warmth that only a mom would have, even though I wasn't their own; they were always there for me even when I pushed them all away in my rebellious years.

" Well that's wonderful that they are letting you stay there. But always know you are welcome here."

" I know, thank you." I said graciously.

Jess grabbed my hand and pulled me up the stairs, running into her older brother, Brandon, on the way up. He was just a little over a year older than Jess, and he was one of the athletic types in Forks. I never really knew him that well at all, but he was nice to me when I was around. I couldn't say we were friends though.

" Ah, Bella Swan, haven't seen you in awhile."

" Yeah, been busy." I said.

He gave a short smile and Jess rolled her eyes, pulling me into her room and shutting the door.

" My brother has always had the hots for you, did you know that? Yeah, he was totally looking down your shirt."

" Shut up! I barely know him, and if you don't remember I'm clearly taken."

She raised an eyebrow, " Are you?"

I sat down in the chair next to her dresser and set my bag down as she plopped onto her bed.

" Yes. I am. I mean...God, I love him to death. I'd do anything...be anything...just to have him in my life. And it sounds stupid and I'm only eighteen but he's everything. No matter how bad my day is or how wrong things are; the moment I see him everything just goes away. Nothing else matters."

Jess was quiet for awhile, taking in my words and letting them sink in before replying.

" Wow, that shit is deep."

I laughed at her response, shaking my head.

" It makes sense though. I mean, I wish that I could have relationships like you and Angela do; all guys see me for is a piece of ass."

" You've got to make them work for it Jess, don't give them what they want on the first date. Guys like a challenge."

She sighed, " You do that with Edward?"

" More like he does that with me." I muttered, " He's always doing something to keep me on my toes."

" So what completely happened today, hm?"

I leaned back, " Where to start..."

" The beginning." she said.

" He was talking about us going to visit his dad in Chicago, and he brought it up to his mom...And Esme just started going into how Edward used to be when he was in Chicago, and how she doesn't want him to get wrapped up in his old friends even if it's just a visit. She didn't want him to get me wrapped up in it either. I mean, I knew he rebelled in Chicago, did things his parents didn't approve of; but I didn't think it was THAT bad, you know? I thought it was like me; getting into the wrong crowd, drinking and smoking...But not getting in actual trouble."

Jess leaned forward and nodded, encouraging me to continue."

" He was arrested twice; the first time for public intoxication. The second time he got pulled over for a DUI. He got in a car accident right before he was sixteen while pulling over on the side of the road for the cops. I thought it was just weed, but he told me that he was also doing coke with his supposed friends. His parents went down really hard on him when he got the DUI; he had two years of his license taken away and had a year of community service. He said he stopped the drinking, but he was still doing coke and weed. The last day of his community service he went to a friend's house, and his friend told him they should celebrate him being done with it...His friend was on the phone and Edward grabbed a blunt. The weed was laced with PCP, and he got fucked up so badly that his friend had to call 911 because he didn't know what to do. He spent the summer in rehab getting clean."

" Whoa." she said.

" Yeah. And he never told me any of this. Nothing."

" So that's why you're so upset?"

I looked down at my linked hands that laid in my lap, " Partly...When he was talking to Esme...He was getting angry. He kept going on about saying how she couldn't think that he hasn't picked up a drink or gotten high, and that getting high and drunk was how he met me because I did the same thing. He told her that I'd come home drunk and get yelled at, and he did the same things but Esme thought I was perfect but he did the same things and he wasn't."

" He said that to her about you?"

I nodded, " Yeah."

She shook her head, " I'd dump his ass."

" It's not that simple Jess. We aren't in middle school or high school when a guy can say something bad and you can break up with him, cry for a day and get over it. Edward is more than just THAT kind of relationship. And yeah, he said that about me; but I still can't...let him go like he's nothing to me."

" I guess I understand what you're saying."

" Yeah...I just need to think for awhile, and I can't do that at the Cullen's."

Jess smiled, " That's why you have me. We'll have fun tonight, don't worry!"

I hoped she was right.

**Authors Note- Alrighty, so I did say prepare for a little drama, right? This chapter actually wrote itself, I didn't plan on this happening, it just did but I hope you guys liked it?**

**A little important news is last week I found out I have to get surgery, and I don't know the date right now; but unless this story is over within a month then it'll most likely interfere. The surgery isn't anything too major, but it will hold me back a few days on writing. I'll definitely let you guys know when this will happen so I don't leave you all hanging; but it shouldn't be a big interference, just wanted to let you all know because I thought I'd give you all the courtesy to know.**

**REVIEWS get TEASERS. If you've never received one and you have reviewed, you must make a change on your setting page to switch the yes/no on allowing them IN ORDER to get a TEASER. Otherwise I can't help you out!**


	35. Words I Couldn't Say

**Authors Note- A little surprise in here for you guys. I'm so sorry this was late, but the holiday weekend kept me super busy! **

**Disclaimer- S. Meyer owns all things Twilight.**

**Chapter Song- Words I Couldn't Say by: Rascal Flatts**

~\\~

EPOV

~\\~

Shutting the door behind me ultimately severed my connection to Bella, and even though I felt like a fucking asshole for doing that to her; I had to walk away before I would say something else I didn't mean. Then again she was already planning on leaving, so nothing could get worse at that point.

I sat down at the end of my bed, rubbing my hands roughly over my face before sighing and looking around my room. My eyes caught the picture frame she'd given me for my birthday last year. It was filled with small pictures of us together, making me remember times where things were just so fucking easy with us. Just being near each other was enough.

I'd never realized how growing up can change relationships, and Bella and I's relationship was completely different now that it had been a year ago, in a very serious way. I couldn't imagine a day without her in it, without at least talking to her or just calling to say goodnight after a long day of classes.

And of course I had to yet again fuck up something that was good for me.

I never knew why I didn't sit down and tell Bella everything about my past. At one point, it seemed like it was too soon to tell her when we had been together in the summer. We'd only had been together for just a few months, and then it seemed like all too soon I was off to college and we were barely hanging on by a string. It wasn't exactly a conversation to have with a girlfriend that was hundreds of miles away.

Especially one who already had a difficult home situation and was emotionally fragile at the time.

When I'd finally gotten her back it seemed like it was too late, and it was a good opportunity to move on with our lives and progress in our relationship. Nobody ever talked about the shit I pulled back in Chicago, it wasn't the topic of conversation when we moved here. New town, new life and a clean slate to go along with it. That's what everybody wanted; to leave behind everything bad in our lives. I knew that was one of the reasons we moved here.

It wasn't just because of a good job offer, like we told everybody else. I'd made my fair share of mistakes that had caused family turmoil, and completely tore apart my parents. Not only did they have to go through a divorce, but had to deal with a fucked up son that did everything to make their lives a living hell just to punish them. I ignored their warnings, and said fuck it to the ways they tried to make it better.

I was a kid. I thought that I knew everything, and of course I thought Riley and Xavier were my best friends at the time. They hadn't been at all, but I didn't see it. I couldn't blame them for the awful things I did though. The way I talked to my parents and completely disrespected and laughed off every word that they would say. Well, that was on me; my choices and mistakes.

My 'friends' encouraged my behavior; thinking that I was so fucking brave for talking to them like that. At one point I almost thought it was cool to degrade them and talk down to them. I didn't care if it hurt them, because all I cared about was myself. I stood up for myself and my friends, the ones who I should have gone against. By the time I realized that they were the ones I needed to get away from and stand up to; it was too late.

At that point I was already being hauled into rehab by my parents, surrounded by people who were even more fucked up than me. As if the thought of being there was bad enough, the people in there scared the shit out of me, too.

I'd sit in a chair during group therapy, surrounded by kids who had dropped acid, did meth and drank themselves into a hospital to get their stomach pumped. I also couldn't forget the kids who did the pills, the most fucked up ones of them all in my own opinion. Yeah, they were all fucked up, but there was nothing like looking into the eyes of someone who was addicted to morphine or oxycodone.

At night all you could hear alarms going off from people trying to steal medicine that other patients actually needed. I remembered the shuffle of footsteps down the hall as they took down a patient and took them to a different wing to be bound and locked into a room. I could remember the fucking blood-curdling screams that would come from the other patients; listening to their yells of how there were spiders and bugs crawling all over them that wouldn't get off no matter what they did.

I was glad not to have those types of withdrawal symptoms.

My mom only visited me once in the three and a half months I was there. Carlisle would visit me every week, but my dad would be there every other day to talk to me. We'd sit for two hours each of those days and he would talk to me, take the time to sit and explain to me why they divorced. He'd tell me that he was sorry for not making time for me, and I'd finally say the words that were truthful that he'd always want to hear from me. The words that he deserved to hear...

It's not your fault. It's mine that I'm in here.

He told me the things that I needed to know, because my mom had never talked to me about it. They were divorced, that was it. She never would talk about it to me, or why it ever happened. And I'd never gotten the time to talk with my dad because he lived further away.

He was too busy.

And that was why my mother enjoyed babying me to this day.

Because of the guilt.

I'd never sat down to talk to her to tell her it was never her fault.

Because she never sat down and told me that the divorce wasn't my fault.

Maybe that was wrong of me. It wasn't up to me to punish her for doing something wrong. I never realized at that time that parents could make mistakes, too.

But she'd never sat down to talk to me after the divorce, because only five months later Carlisle had come along, with Alice and Emmett at his side with suitcases ready to move right in. Like the divorce never happened. That was when I really started to rebel against my mom. I'd felt like after my father left I had to be the man of the house; try to take care of things. But that didn't hold up well. Carlisle came in and took that right away.

I grew up in a house where my parents were completely in love with each other, and they loved me just as much. When I went to bed they both tucked me in. My dad was the kind of father who sat outside and tossed a ball around with me after work, and my mom was the one who baked and made a warm homemade dinner before he arrived while I helped or did my homework at the table to keep her company. She'd greet him at the door with the brightest smile and a kiss that showed that even though he'd been gone for just a few hours; she'd missed him.

We were the family that watched a movie together on the couch almost every night, and we'd go out for ice-cream every single Friday no matter what happened. They'd help out with school events, and stay up late with me when I had to do projects. My mom would pack my dad's lunch and my lunch on the counter, next to each other. I had a backpack on my back on the way out, and he had a briefcase in his hand after kissing my mom goodbye.

Every day she picked me up from school because she didn't want me to take the bus, and even grocery shopping was a family event. Every single Saturday. On Sunday and Saturday my dad would make either his famous pancakes, French toast or bacon, eggs and toast with homemade biscuits and fresh jelly. The three of us basically did everything together, we were so close. My parents were so in love with each other that people found it sickening at times.

I wanted a relationship exactly like theirs when I was little. I wanted a wife to kiss me when I arrived home, and my little son or daughter to play with and spoil. All of those dreams had been shattered when they said they were separating. I looked up to them, dreamt of having that kind of relationship and to see it disappear like it did broke me.

Those were the hardest things to get through. I realized there would be no more of those movie nights, or helping my mom make my dad's favorite dinner in the kitchen. And even though they sounded like the most trivial things, they made us a family. When I looked at my mother now, it wasn't the same mom that I grew up with. With Carlisle she tries so much harder to look nice for him...The fucking skirts and blouses and heels...The lifestyle...it changed her.

I missed the mom that walked around in sweatpants and a t-shirt, not even caring that she didn't have time for makeup, ironing her shirts or properly shining her shoes and curling her hair. She didn't need the newest fashion, or the thousands of dollars worth of diamonds on her ears and neck.

My dad always told her that she was beautiful the way that she was, and he did his best to support us and give her everything she would ever need. And it was enough; atleast I'd thought it was. We didn't live in a mansion with three floors that were decked out with more shit that anybody would ever need. There didn't have to be 'wings' of a house. No. We had an upstairs, a downstairs, and a scary dark basement. Not one with a wet bar and an entirely furnished movie theater room and a play room with pool tables and other fancy machine.

It's nice to have those things, but to me it doesn't make you appreciate life and what you have. What's there to appreciate if you have everything you could possible want? The newest fashion, newest appliance?

When I think about my future, I don't want that kind of life with Bella. When I buy her something special; I want to see that glimmer in her eyes like she is so grateful to get it; so honored to be able to own it. It was how my mother was on a holiday or birthday when my father had gotten her something special.

But now my mother almost acts like she is entitled to have it no matter what day of the year. And it was never my business what she does with her or Carlisle's money, but it was true that those kinds of riches changed a person.

My parents had changed after the divorce, most evidently my mother. As if she didn't change enough from the divorce, but once she met Carlisle. My father was almost the same to me, which was why I'd so desperately wanted to stay with him when we'd planned to move here. He was familiar; he hadn't changed himself for anybody. He was him and that's all that mattered. Of course, he wasn't perfect, but he didn't try to impress everybody around him with the way he dressed, or the things he owned.

I had taught myself afterwards that change was always a bad thing, because everything that had changed in my life had never been for the better. The only change that ever was significant to me was Bella. She was the only good thing that had changed my life for the better.

I regretted every single word that I'd said to my mother about Bella, but at most times it felt as if my mother never had trust in me and to say in the least; it's fucking frustrating. Of course mentioning visiting my father would make her wary, but the fact that she would insinuate that I would get Bella wrapped up in how I used to act there was a goddamn insult.

After I'd gotten out of rehab I'd immediately run into Riley and Xavier back in school, and I didn't find myself wrapped up in smoking, drinking and doing coke again even after that. I'd made it very clear that I couldn't do it anymore after everything I went through, and my parents went through. They'd paid a lot of fucking money to get me into a good rehabilitation center, the best in Chicago. After all of that I had to work on building their trust back up again.

I came home right after school, I rarely went out and when I did I followed my curfew. The only bad habit I'd picked up over that time was smoking, and I found that it honestly got rid of all the stress from trying so hard not to get back into my old ways.

My parents weren't happy at all about my newest addiction, but it wasn't leading me on the road to complete and utter destruction so they got over it. It was better than walking in the house drunk making enough noise to wake everybody up.

At night I remember walking into the house some times, listening to my mom on the phone talking to my dad and crying because she didn't know what to do with me. He couldn't take me in because he wouldn't have time to keep an eye on me, and he was afraid it would be worse because of that fact. With my mom I had less freedom; but that didn't mean that I actually listened.

It wasn't until things had gotten serious and I got into legal trouble that I realized things needed to change. But they couldn't change the piercings and the people who already influenced me into what I was doing, they also couldn't change a lot of other things; but it took awhile for me to realize that it was up to me to change it. Not only for myself; but for my parents.

I reached into my bedside table, digging underneath all of the random items in there until I felt a familiar box. The velvety fabric was familiar, and I pulled it from the drawer and cradled it in my hands. When it snapped open, I stared at the beautiful ring, touching the delicate diamonds around it.

It was probably ridiculous for someone at the age of nineteen, but almost twenty, holding a fucking engagement ring in their hands. Only looking at it made me feel overwhelmed. I knew that Bella was only eighteen, and marriage was probably the last thing that she wanted from me right now.

But when I saw the ring in the window all I could think about was Bella.

I'd fucked up.

But I'd find a way to make it right after giving her a little bit of time for herself.

~\\~

BPOV

~\\~

" Don't mope, Bella."

" Not moping." I argued, taking a deep drag of my cigarette.

Jess sat next to me and slipped a beer next to me by my hip. I raised my eyebrow at her, cocking my head to the side.

" Where'd you get this?" I asked with a laugh.

She smiled, " Snuck it. Nobody will notice, don't worry. I called up Ange, and she's having a 'date night' with Ben. You probably don't want to hear about mushy relationship shit anyways right now."

I rolled my eyes at her and put my cigarette between my lips, reaching out to twist the cap on the beer. After downing about half of the contents, I set it down on the step and took another drag of the cigarette.

" You know, I've never smoked before." Jess said.

I looked over at her.

Rarely did you hear Jess say she didn't do anything, because honestly this girl comes up with the craziest shit to do at random times. It's pretty entertaining mostly, especially when it comes to the conversation of boys.

" Don't look at me like that!"

" I'm just surprised! I mean, you were the first one between Angela, you and I to do everything!"

She shrugged, " Yeah, well, I've never smoked, now you know!"

" Don't do it, it's awful." I said with a laugh.

" Then stop!"

" You want to see me without at least three a day? Nu uh, you'll be forcing one on me within an hour of how irritated I am."

The corner of her lip twisted up in a smirk, " I'm just picturing it in my mind."

" What? Me being irritated?" I asked, taking a swig of the beer. It wasn't really that good, but beer was beer, I'd drink it anyways.

" Nah, you and Edward being one of those couples that just has really hot sex and then you lay on each side of the bed with a cigarette all lit up."

I bumped her shoulder, " That is so not us."

" So you guys just cuddle and go to sleep. Like in the movies? Usually I'm up and out of whatever bed putting my clothes back on."

I looked over at her, watching as she looked out into the night with a frustrated look on her face.

" Jess, you just got to challenge a guy. That's what we told you at the beach, you know? Yeah, we all have sexual urges, but you've got to keep it at bay. I mean, if Angela jumped into bed with Ben, and I jumped into bed with Edward, do you think there'd be a chance we'd still have them?"

" Angela, no. You, yes?"

I gave her a look, " Why me?"

" What you and Edward have is like...God, I've talked about with Angela... But something about you guys it's like no matter what happens, you'll always find a way to be together in the end. The way he looks at you and the way you look at him is something that only people see in fucking movies. It's like the Notebook or some shit, but it's the kind of love that everybody wants."

Hearing someone say that out loud to me was kind of shocking. I mean, I sure as hell felt like Edward was my soul mate, and the only one I wanted to be with, but to know that someone could see it and put an explanation to it was interesting. I couldn't explain it.

" That's why I know you guys are going to be perfectly fine after this."

" I just don't know why he didn't tell me. And why he had to say those things to his mother...It doesn't make sense. We've always been honest with each other, or that's what I thought...But...It's just so confusing."

" It'll work out, Bella, don't worry."

~\\~

It was before midnight when Jess had passed out. We'd settled in with a few movies to help us fall asleep, but it didn't exactly do the trick for me. There were too many thoughts and my body just didn't want to catch a fucking break. I snuck out of Jess' bed, careful not to rustle the bed to bother her. She was already clinging to the pillow next to her snoring, making me roll my eyes.

Rather it the pillow than me.

I snuck downstairs in my shorts and sweatshirt with my cigarettes in my pocket. I sat out on the back porch where I was hours before and stepped into the grass. The grass scratched against my ankles, and I finally settled on a stone bench by the bonfire pit. I lit up a cigarette and let out a long puff of smoke.

For awhile it was quiet, just the darkness surrounding me and a cricket chirping every few seconds. I heard the sliding glass door open and shut behind me, and I turned around quickly to identify who it was.

Brandon walked out on the grass and took a seat in a chair across from me, his knee close enough to almost touch mine. I wasn't exactly sure why he was out here, I mean, fuck; I didn't really know the guy all that much.

" It's after midnight, what are you doing out here?"

" Is there an issue with me being out here?"

" Nah, just wondering."

I nodded and continued to smoke, feeling a little awkward with him there to watch me.

" So, Jess said you're having boyfriend issues?" he asked with a laugh.

Furrowing my brows, I looked back over at him, " Kind of, why?"

He ran his hand through his light brown hair, " Just asking, figured maybe you'd want to talk about it."

" No offense at all, but why would I talk to you about it?"

" An objective point of view, someone who doesn't have any inside information." he said simply.

With a shrug I put the cigarette out and put the filter back into the box.

" Not really necessary to sit and explain to everybody what's happening. It's not like we're breaking up or anything."

" I never said that."

" I'm just going to head inside." I said swiftly, getting a little bit annoyed and not wanting to really get into conversation about it.

When I got up, he followed right behind me. As I reached the door and entered the house, I was in the kitchen. Taking me completely by surprise, he had completely shifted his position to be in front of me and leaned down to kiss me. The moment his lips pressed against mine I pushed away from him incredulously, the force of my hands on his chest making him stumble backwards.

" What the fuck do you think you're doing? I barely fucking know you!"

He brushed his hand down my arm, " I thought maybe I could fix-"

" Fix something that isn't even broken? Fuck off."

Before he could say anything I made my way upstairs to Jess' room, not knowing whether to be even more annoyed by him or just pissed off. As I shut the door behind me in her room, Jess rolled over in her bed and sat up, rubbing her eyes tiredly.

" Where were you? Everything alright?" she rasped.

" Went to get a cigarette and your brother followed me outside. He was acting all fucking weird so I came inside and he just fucking kissed me downstairs in your kitchen."

Immediately she tossed the covers off of her, " Are you serious? I am so going to-"

I shook my head, " No, just chill out. I just wanted to tell you because...well, fuck, I need to tell someone! Let's just go to bed, alright?"

" Fine, fine...He kissed you right? You didn't come at him lips a blazin' because of everything with Edward?"

" No! He came at me asking if I wanted to talk to him about it and I felt uncomfortable so I just left. He followed straight after me and just kissed me. Seriously, totally unexpected."

She groaned and laid back in her bed, covering up with the blankets, " I told you he had the hots for you, Bella. You didn't listen!"

I rolled my eyes, " Whatever."

" Are you going to tell Edward?" she asked as I laid on my side of the bed.

" Yeah...When I talk to him next. I wouldn't keep that from him."

" You sure? I mean, it was just a kiss. Why make fuss out of it?"

I pulled the blanket up to my waist, " Secrets cause issues; trust me on this."

" I just thi-"

" Can we go to bed?" I asked quietly.

I felt Jess pat my arm, " Yeah, sure thing. Just looking out for you, Bella."

" I know, thanks Jess."

And from them it was silent. I turned onto my side, trying to stay still and not bother Jess; but unable to get comfortable. I wanted Edward's arms around me, holding me closely to his bare chest while my hand traced patterns on his back...

_You were the one who left!_

I ignored my thoughts and sighed quietly, squeezing my eyes shut in a desperate attempt for sleep.

~\\~

At three in the morning I found myself tip-toeing out of Jess' bedroom and heading downstairs to the Stanley's basement. It was fully furnished, and basically set up as a second family room like the Cullen's. They had a massive plush couch down there and I figured maybe it would help me sleep better.

I'd shared a bed with Jess before, but tonight I couldn't seem to fall asleep, and all of my shifting was going to wake her up so I decided to fly solo and go lay in the basement to sleep. I turned the television on and flipped through the movie channels. When I saw Pirates of the Caribbean was on I switched to it, a smile spreading across my face as I pressed my cheek into the plush cushion of the couch. I reached over for a pillow and used it, and tugged the blanket tossed over the couch onto me as I kept my eyes on the television.

I passed out before the movie was over, into a deep but restless sleep.

~\\~

" Hey, sleepy. My mom made breakfast; get it while it's hot." I heard Jess say.

I rolled over and groaned; wanting to go back to sleep; but my stomach was telling me a whole other story. Breakfast sounded great right now, especially since I wasn't the one making it.

" Sleep good?"

I shrugged as I sat up, " Kinda."

" Used to being wrapped up in Mr. Sexy's arms, huh?"

Jess laughed as I shoved her shoulder and walked up the stairs to the main floor. Walking into the kitchen I was hit with the smell of bacon and eggs and my stomach growled even louder. On the table were various breakfast items on platters and in bowls, scrambled eggs, bacon, hash browns, egg and spinach frittata, sausage patties, waffles, and fruit salad.

" Why do you only make awesome breakfast when we have guests?" Jess asked as she sat down and piled her plate with food.

Cara laughed, " I'm sorry, sweetheart, but Bella over there is just a stick figure; she needs to fatten up."

I smiled and sat down to eat my breakfast. It was already June 14th, a Saturday. In six days Edward's twentieth Birthday would be here. His gift was ordered a month ago right about when we arrived here, and I'd gone out with Alice to Seattle for one of her ridiculous shopping trips.

Of course, I found myself in Tiffany's and was looking over all of the numerous watches and jewelry they had here. I remembered that a few months prior Edward had broken his watch around January, it was a gift from his eighteenth Birthday from his dad, and he was actually pretty upset it broke.

So when I saw that they had a forty five percent off of select watches I jumped at it I somehow had gotten him a five thousand dollar watch down to twenty seven hundred dollars. I knew that all of that money was just about what I made working at the coffee shop, but I had my savings and I wanted to get him something nice for his birthday. Especially since he'd gotten me those beautiful earrings for Christmas and I'd never been able to get him anything.

" Hey, do you think we could venture out to Seattle? I have to pick up Edward's Birthday gift and all; I can give you gas money."

Jess clapped her hands, " Hells yeah! Road trip!"

Jess' mom gave her a look, " You be careful. Seattle is almost three hours away, girls."

She rolled her eyes and waved her hand at her mom and we both dug into or breakfast greedily. I was starved, and since we were spending a day out I wanted to eat so we wouldn't have to make multiple stops for food.

Once we finished we headed upstairs, Jess let me shower first while she cleaned up her room from last night, and I dressed and did my makeup in her bedroom while she took a shower herself. I put on a tan colored bandeau top that had a white tribal pattern and tossed on a loose white racer back tank top that was a little sheer, hence the bandeau. It had a breast pocket on the left and it was just very flowy. I slightly tucked it in just near the middle of my medium wash shorts and looped a scarf through the belt loops of the shorts, tying it in the front to give my outside a little bit more something, the print was tribal with very bright colors so brought something to the table. I put on my heart necklaces and then slipped into my lace-less all stars that was a color that matched my bandeau.

Afterwards I did my makeup at her vanity, a little bit of light foundation, cover-up for my fucking purple under eyes, eyeliner on my upper and bottom lash line and then winged it out before adding mascara.

Jess was finished by the time I got my makeup all done, so I blow dried my hair and she got dressed as I finished up in the bathroom. I borrowed her straightened as she did her makeup and we finished mostly on time; ready to head into Seattle.

" So, where are we heading to in Seattle?"

" Tiffany's."

" Whoa, fancy. What exactly did you get him for his Birthday?"

I put my sunglasses on top of my head and put my phone in my bag, " I got an awesome deal on a watch when I was there with Alice. So I ordered it and wanted to get it engraved for him."

" Look at you, Miss. Moneybags, spending money at Tiffany. I probably couldn't buy sterling silver there." Jess quipped with a laugh.

We headed downstairs and Jess said goodbye to her mom, grabbing her keys off the hook in the foyer; twirling them on her finger as she opened up the front door and let me go out first. After locking the door behind her she jumped off the front step and smacked my ass with a laugh.

" Let's hit the road, hot stuff!"

**Authors Note- Alright, so I hope you guys enjoyed the little look into our Edward's head. We'll see a little bit more of him as we go on, so embrace it! Never fear, the drama isn't nearly over yet so prepare for it…**

**REVIEWS get TEASERS.**

**Also a small side note, if you don't get a teaser after I've uploaded after a week, it's generally because I plan on uploading THAT day, so if you don't get it, just expect an update that day. I don't think it's necessary to send out a teaser for a chapter I'll be posting that day.**


	36. It's Complicated

**Authors Note- Not nearly as long as the last few chapters, but you'll understand why…**

**Disclaimer- S. Meyer owns all things Twilight.**

**Chapter Song- It's Complicated by: A Day To Remember**

~\\~

EPOV

(Night Before Bella and Jess go to the mall)

~\\~

It was midnight, and I found myself downstairs in the kitchen sitting at the barstools. I was already on my third cup of tea and it still wasn't helping to tire me. Hell, I'd basically tried everything at this point but it was all epically failing. It was my fuck up in the first place.

If I'd just opened up to Bella about everything in my past I wouldn't fucking be here right now. I'd be upstairs in bed with her in my arms; fast asleep like it always is when she is next to me. Lazily, I spun the tea bag around the cup, leaning into the counter as I watched the drink darken in color.

The distraction of the tea almost made me miss the sound of footsteps walking down the hallway. I looked back and saw my mother standing near the edge of the couch near the fireplace across the way. She was in her pajama's, and looked just about as close to sleep as I did.

" What are you doing down here so late?"

She was upset at me, and had every reason and right to be. The way I spoke to her was out of line, and I knew that even though I was an adult; my mother was still in charge in some way. I always knew she was fiercely protective of me after everything in Chicago, and when I mentioned seeing my dad; that part of her came out and the way I reacted to it wasn't at all fair.

It didn't help that she was upset at me for what I said about Bella. I couldn't blame her. I fucking hated myself for saying it too, because I didn't mean for it to sound at all the way it came out; and it wasn't right for me to say that to my mother.

I disregarded her question and glanced over at her, " I'm sorry. The way I talked to you this afternoon was uncalled for. I know you weren't trying to control me and boss me around; but I just...It upset me that you immediately thought I'd go back to how I was especially with Bella there with me. It felt like you didn't at all trust me and it made me angry."

Slowly she walked up to the seat next to me and hopped up on it, resting her hand on the counter as she faced me.

" I'm your mother, it's my job to be worried and to protect you no matter how old you are. I don't do it to make you angry or to piss you off; I do it because I care. I will admit, it was wrong of me to bring Bella into the equation because I know how you are about her; but it's still a concern of mine that you will fall back into what you did those years ago."

" I never told Bella about everything I did back in Chicago. She didn't leave solely because of what I said to you about her; she left because I kept it from her."

Honestly, I expected my mom to gasp. Hell, I wouldn't have been surprised if she slapped my arm and told me how much of a terrible person I was for not telling Bella anything. Or even go into some kind of lecture or rant; but she didn't.

She didn't even look fucking surprised at all.

" I figured that when I saw you sitting on the floor and heard you telling stories outside her door. Why didn't you tell her in the first place?" she asked calmly.

" I didn't want her to know that I was _that _kind of guy. She's always telling me how lucky she is to have me, and I just think to myself that it's not even close to even being true. I've done hard drugs before, I've been arrested for underage drinking, driving under the influence and I've been to rehab to get clean..."

A hand rested over mine, " Bella would have been proud of you for trying to fix it, Edward."

" But I didn't, mom. Can't you see that? The reason I'm clean is because of dad. If it weren't for him throwing me in there, forcing me to see a therapist while I was there and seeing me every two days I'd be walking out of there in the end and going back to do what I did before."

She shook her head, " No. Your father helped you, but you did all of the work. Edward, if you didn't at least try it would have been different; you know that."

" I just didn't want that image of me to be in her mind; ever. I told her I wasn't a good kid, but knowing the extent wasn't something I bothered to talk about."

" The people who love you and the ones who matter will accept you for you who are and what you've done. And you'd better hope and pray to god that Bella gives you the time of day to tell her what needs to be said son. That girl has done so much for you that I don't think you see. She has made you a better and kind, gentle man. And what you said about her today doesn't taint that imagine of her, because I know that girl is good on the inside. She's not someone to throw around, Edward. Isabella Swan is a special young girl, and she should be treated with respect. That's the least she should get from you."

" I know she isn't, I know. I love her so much more than anything and I just can't...I don't know why I said what I did besides I was angry and I was frustrated. But I want to do right by her; I want to fix it."

My mom gave me a stern look, and I knew the exact words that she had coming right out of her mouth.

" Don't you use that ring as a way to fix this, kid. Or you will mess things up more than you'd imagine."

" I won't; I didn't plan to. When...If she comes back; I know that I have to talk to her."

" I know you'll find a way to make this right, sweetheart. And she'll come back. If she loves you like I think she does; there is no reason to worry about that. Now, you should go upstairs and get some sleep. Tomorrow might be a long day."

I nodded and stood up, taking my tea with me. My mother followed suit and wrapped her arms around me in a hug. I wrapped my free arm around her and she rubbed my back.

" We all make mistakes; we're only human."

" I know."

" And it doesn't matter what ever stupid things you say; you're my son and I love you."

" Love you, too, ma."

Once she released me I headed upstairs as she leafed around in the kitchen for something. As I walked down the hallway towards my room I paused at the door to the guest bedroom. I nudged it open and stepped into the room, immediately enveloped in Bella's scent. It was strawberries and citrus and warm vanilla. It made me miss her even more; the real thing was better.

There was no use trying to fall asleep in my own bed, so I collapsed onto the mattress in here and all I could smell was her. With a deep sigh I pulled the blankets around me and stared at the ceiling above me; trying to go through all of the fucking thoughts in my brain. Trying to configure through it all on where I'd start to fix all of this.

I knew I had a lot of things to talk to Bella about, or maybe something more along the lines of explaining. I'd only hope she'd give me the opportunity to fucking fix my mistakes.

It was never that I didn't trust her not to judge me, because in an opposite situation I never judged her for drinking and doing whatever else she did in her past. I loved her, and I accepted every single part of her. But things were just as I told her, I had fucking insecurities about it that held me back.

I never felt like it was something that I should walk up to her and just say, and I knew that was a fucking terrible excuse. Maybe trying to preserve my image of being perfect in her eyes tainted everything. She showed me who she was; good and bad, and maybe it was about time for me to step up, or down, and be really fucking real with her about everything.

No, I wasn't putting on a fucking show for her, but maybe if I showed her the negative in my life things would be better for both of us.

With a deep sigh I rolled over and rested my head on the pillow next to me, hoping I'd have a better shot at falling asleep this time around.

~\\~

BPOV

~\\~

I had to endure Jessica's bubblegum pop music all the way to Seattle, and this included Spice Girls, NSYNC, Backstreet Boys and other 90's bands that I hadn't listened to since I was like ten. It was music that I looked back and couldn't believe I ever wasted my time listening to; and I had no idea why Jessica was listening to it anyways. It was pretty funny though to see her belting out the lyrics with the windows down on the highway.

Everybody got a taste of Jess' bad singing that day.

By the time we got to Seattle it was really busy; which was expected considering it was a Saturday. The traffic on the highway wasn't bad, but in the city it was something else. I hadn't heard Jess swear so much at people before. I'd never drived myself much to Seattle, but usually bummed a ride with a friend whenever I did go. You definitely had to be an aggressive driver in this area of Washington.

I'd never driven here myself at all actually, but I never thought my truck would actually make it all the way here.

Speaking of the god forsaken truck, I'd left it at school for the summer; which there was a fine for it, but there was no way I was driving that thing across the country again. It definitely wouldn't survive this time around, so I wasn't going to be taking a chance with that even happening. Paying for the flight here wasn't something to be desired, even though Edward offered to do it for me; but I didn't want him to pay for it and he didn't put up a fit about that.

After a long three and a half hour drive, I was looking forward to getting out of the small car and stretching my legs. When we'd gotten to Tiffany's, Jess's eyes lit up like a kid on Christmas and I knew she was even more excited than me to be here right now. Once we walked in she ran towards the engagement rings, and I couldn't help but to roll my eyes at her antics.

I went up to the front counter and was met with the lady I'd placed the order with, Kate, she gave me a smile as if she'd remembered me and I smiled in return.

" Hi, I'm-"

" Isabella Swan? You came in about last month and bought a watch right?" she asked kindly.

I nodded, " Yes. I had it on hold here to get engraved."

" Yes, of course. I'll go grab it and be right back."

I thanked her as she disappeared towards the back, her long blonde hair swiftly flowing behind her. When I walked over to Jess she had a glimmer in her eyes as she looked at the beautiful diamond rings. They were all beautiful, and extremely pricey. I could only imagine what Edward had paid when he'd bought me my bracelet and necklace. Along with the other things. He never made a big deal about it though.

As I skimmed over the sparkly diamonds, one I had noticed had specifically caught my eye.

It was simple in its own way. The band was all silver but it had rectangular, almost round looking, Lucida diamond as they called it, and on each side of the diamond were two triangle shaped ones. It sparkled a little bit more than the others, and it was just absolutely gorgeous. I stared at it for a moment and then my eyes wandered over to the price.

Thirteen thousand four hundred.

My eyes bulged and I shook my head, looking away. I couldn't imagine anybody paying that much for an engagement ring. But then again, it's supposed to be flashier than a wedding band so I guess I couldn't be so surprised.

" God, I would die to get one of these." Jess sighed

" Don't press your face against the glass, it'll leave marks." I teased her as I stepped over to the front as Kate came back holding a box. It was the signature Tiffany blue color, and she opened up the box and slid out another, which was made out of black leather. She pointed it towards me in the direction where it opened and the watch was revealed. I was almost taken back by how nice it looked; I'd almost forgotten.

It was a stainless steel watch with a gray dial and a black alligator strap that was very sturdy and nice. There was automatic winding and had a date window; and it was water resistant just in case Edward happened to drop it in anything. The numbers in roman numerals, and to me it was a beautiful watch. I hoped that he would love it. It was better than I could even describe to someone.

Carefully I took it from the leather confines and looked at the back plate. Tiffany&Co was already on the back at the lower part, but in the middle it was engraved with the month of his Birthday, and this year. Right below it, in beautiful elegant letters was, _Love Always, Your Isabella_.

I was never fond of my full name, but Edward always told me how beautiful it was so I wanted to use it for his watch since I planned to engrave it. I wanted him to remember when he got it and who it was from; and that I loved him and put thought into it. As I looked at it, my eyes stung with tears and I sighed, blinking them away; not wanting to cry or be upset in a public place.

I hoped that we would be okay after all of this, and I knew I was the one who left and it was up to me to go back; but getting past this is hopefully not going to be as hard as it seems to me right now. She smiled at me and leaned against the counter as she glanced at the watch and then me

" Do you like it?"

" I absolutely love it."

" Great. Since you've pre-paid any everything you are all ready to go! I'll just box it right back up and get a bag for you."

" Thank you." I said, handing her the watch.

She placed everything back and closed the leather box, and put it into the blue tiffany box before putting it into a bag with white tissue paper galore. After she handed me the bag with a bright smile on her face, I walked over to Jess and put my hand around her wrist, dragging her away from the display so that we could leave. Any longer and I was convinced she'd buy a ring for herself to wear around.

After huffing at me, we walked out of the door and got into the car. I set the bag in the trunk of her car to keep it safe, not wanting to leave it in the back where anybody could see it around here. Since we were already out here, Jess wanted to go shopping at the mall so we went to go hang out there for however long she wanted. Luckily, we were able to find a parking space somewhere in all of the ridiculously filled up rows.

Once we were inside I was thrust into store after store, but I honestly wasn't paying much attention to anything; I just followed Jess through all of the stores and appeased her when she pressed a top against herself and asked how good it looked. My mind was clearly on other things, and I couldn't seem to get Edward off of it.

It hadn't even been a full day and I already missed him like fucking crazy, which sounded pretty pathetic; but I couldn't help myself. I was used to waking up with him there, and sleeping with him right by my side after a long day of doing whatever the fuck we came up with at the time. It didn't matter if we were out all day running around, or spending a day inside watching movies or being lazy; it was being together was what made the day good.

Once I get back to the Cullen's we have to have a talk and it wouldn't be a very particularly enjoyable one, but I just needed more understanding at this point. I was starting to be bothered by everything, and I didn't want to wait until it was too late to address it and find a resolution to all of it.

Tomorrow, I told myself. Tomorrow I'd go back there and face all of this. I couldn't hide from my problems forever.

With the rest of the Cullen's, I knew that they were probably irritating Edward about what happened, and a part of me felt bad about it, but the other part didn't. He decided not to tell me and should have known that it was inevitable that I'd have to find out eventually. They'd of course wonder why he never said anything to me; I wanted to know myself. I took a step forward and wondered if this was something that he could have kept from me if our relationship progressed further.

What if we'd gotten married and he never told me?

I guess that would have been worse than this... I mean, I'd definitely be more pissed about it I'd like to think.

Fingers snapped in front of my face and I shook myself out of my trance.

" Earth to Bella? Helloooo."

" I'm here. What?"

She laughed, " Where were you just then?"

" Just thinking."

She gave me a knowing look but didn't say anything, instead shifting through the racks at H&M until she deemed it that they didn't have anything and we went on to the next store. It went on like this for awhile, leafing from store to store until she got bored and decided to walk into a new one. Whatever suited her I honestly didn't care; once I snapped out of my thoughts all of her moving around kept my mind busy and going.

Three full shopping bags in her hand later, Jess decided she was hungry and I thanked god because I was pretty starved after running around this joint for so fucking long. Jess didn't leave time for breaks between each store.

We went to the food court and ordered some pizza and drinks before sitting at a square table by the railings. It was extra greasy and extra delicious right now and exactly what I wanted after today. Hell, I'd eat a horse I was so fucking hungry.

" You miss him already, huh?" Jess said, taking a bite of her pizza.

I shrugged, " Yeah. It's pathetic."

" No, it's cute I think."

" I'll probably go back there tomorrow...Talk to him about everything."

" What is there to talk about?" she asked.

" Fuck, I don't even know? He told me that he didn't know why he didn't tell me and that he was sorry, but I just can't get it in my head that it's the reason. There is more to make of it to me...maybe that is just it though; I just don't want to accept it."

" I guess you'll never know unless you sit down and give him a last chance to tell you. You don't think he'd actually lie to you about something though, do you?"

I snorted, " Ask me that a week ago and I'd say fuck no. But after this, I'm not sure. He broke my trust a little, and that doesn't mean I don't love him as much as I did a few days ago, but trust is something I don't give out like a free pass."

" Understandable."

After we finished out lunch, we headed upstairs and found ourselves in Victoria's Secret, go figure. Jess was looking at all of the lingerie and lacy scraps known as underwear, and I was looking through the soft, cotton nighties they had on sale.

" Oh, this is hot!" Jess said, holding up a red lacy number that had black trim and bows that held the underwear together.

I had to agree, it was pretty 'hot', but I'd never be caught dead wearing something like that. It was completely see through; I didn't even see the point of wearing it in that case, why not just parade naked for a guy instead of that. Personally, I think it's more attractive to leave something to the imagination, or at least that's what I've fucking learned myself.

Edward preferred the color blue anyways. And while Victoria's Secret was kind of pricy, the lace sometimes felt a little bit scratchy depending on the item. Or maybe I was just a fucking spoiled brat because Edward liked to purchase me expensive French lingerie.

He may be nineteen years old but he has absolutely no shame walking into an expensive store to buy lingerie for his eighteen year old girlfriend. I can't express how many times he's told me all the funny looks he gets because he looks young compared to the thirty and forty year olds who walk in there.

I didn't ever really mind much when he bought those kinds of things for me, because they were just as much a gift to him as they were to me; so I never really bothered to argue. When it came to actual clothing, well, he knew that it was a completely different story.

Jess bought a few lace underwear sets and I bought two of the cotton nighties, one was in a dark blue color, and the other one was a light pink color with white writing in a cursive script that showed where it was from.

After we'd had enough of the mall, we headed back out the car and put all of our new clothing items in the trunk. It was still pretty early in the day, so we just decided to drive around until we ended up at a Seattle Waterfront Park. As it was towards the evening the lights were all turned on around here and it was really beautiful. We leaned against the railings and looked out on the water, watching it ripple with the light breeze.

" So I'm thinking of maybe going to U of W." Jess said completely out of the blue.

" What, why? I thought you were-"

" I know, I was talking all about beauty school in Port Angeles and how much I was looking forward to it...But I think I want something different. So I applied before Christmas and I should be getting a letter any day now. I just want to know if I get in, and maybe if I do then it will push me to make a choice."

" What do you want to do?"

" I've been thinking a lot about it, and I think I want to go through with doing the Nursing Program there."

My eyes widened, and I completely did not expect that to come out of Jess' mouth, but it did. Jess was by no means not smart enough to do it; I just couldn't actually wrap my mind around it. For the longest time she wanted to go to beauty school, she'd talked about it for so long which was why I was so surprised.

" I know I was all about beauty college and all that..."

" Everybody changes their mind, that's only normal. I mean, if you figure out what you want to be and stick with it than that's great; but that's not everybody you know?"

She nodded, " I just think it would be interesting, you know? My mom was a nurse until she had me, and I'd remember all the stories; and when I looked up the programs online it all looks really interesting and I think it might be a good fit for me."

" I think that's awesome, Jess."

" My dad thinks that I've got absolutely insane."

I shook my head, " You aren't. Honestly, I mean, as long as you dedicate yourself to it...We all know how jumpy you can be at times."

" Yeah, I know. But I really think I want to do it."

" I bet you'd be great."

She smiled, " Thanks. You are the only person to say that so far."

We hung around at the pier for awhile, talking and enjoying the light breeze that washed over the ocean and to us. There weren't many people around here, just a few people passing by from small stores; otherwise it was just us.

Eventually we knew we had to head back because of the long trip we had back home. We got onto I-5 and stayed on a few miles before getting on 104 towards Edmonds-Kingston I was tired, and honestly wanted to get some sleep and have tomorrow be here already. I missed Edward, and I wanted to get back to him.

Jess was still in high spirits, playing the eighties instead of nineties on the way home; but luckily she wasn't blasting it this time around. We got the car onto the ferry and that was five miles until we went West on 104 and then 20 miles until we were turning a right onto the familiar one-oh-one to get to Forks. I had no idea how Jess was the one driving with all the energy and I was almost asleep in my seat from such a long day out.

As she got off on the ramp into Forks, I shifted in my seat, putting the seatbelt behind me to get more comfortable.

" Ah, come on Bella! Don't be such a lazy bones and party it up with me!"

She turned into the left turn lane as it turned red and just as it turned green Jess pressed on the gas, still singing her song out loud with her usual loud enthusiasm. Immediately lights blinded me from my right, making me wince away from the brightness. My eyes were wide and on instinct my body scrambled up to move towards the other side of the car, but the seatbelt was going against me.

I twisted my body towards the side facing the door trying to get out, but there wasn't enough time. I heard Jess scream my name loudly before I felt the right side of my body being enveloped in pure agony before everything faded into black.

**Authors Note- I know the teaser wasn't as detailed as it should have been at the end, but I didn't want to give too much information before the chapter got out**

**So please don't hate me? I love you guys!**

**REVIEWS get TEASERS!**


	37. Priceless

**Authors Note- I could give a long explanation on how I'm sorry I am this is being posted so late...but I'm sure you guys just want to read the chapter. Love you all. ON WITH IT.**

**Disclaimer- S. Meyer owns all things Twilight.**

**Chapter Song- Priceless by: Mayday Parade**

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BPOV

~\\~

_"...shattered...somewhat...in shock...fractured...head trauma...bone protruding...blood."_

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_BEEP_

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_BEEP_

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_" Immediate surgery...paralyzed...rate...dropping...losing her!"_

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_" CLEAR!"_

~\\~

EPOV

~\\~

" EDWARD! Edward, wake up right now. Get up!" I heard Alice screaming beside me.

I jostled awake, completely unaware of where the fuck I was until I realized that I was in the guest room for the second night in a row without Bella. The light in the room blinded me and I saw Esme run into the room and throw a pair of my jeans on the bed before running out with a terrified look on her face. I ran my hand over her face and was filled with confusion.

Looking to Alice, she had tears in her eyes and she was holding my wrist from trying to shake me from my sleeping state.

What in the fuck was going on?

" I just got a call from Leah, Edward. Bella's in the hospital. Her and her friend had gone out and they got in a car accident. It's really bad, Edward. It's really bad." she cried.

The moment she said hospital I was already out of bed. My heart raced as I put on the jeans my mom had thrown at me. Alice handed me a shirt and I grabbed it before running down the hallway; ignoring Alice yelling at me to hold on and wait for her.

There was no fucking holding on.

Bella was in the hospital.

My breathing was ragged and I struggled to catch my breath, but I didn't care. I pulled on my converse shoes that were in the hallway and as I went towards the front door I ran into Carlisle. He grabbed onto my shoulders and looked me in the eye, stopping me from my frantic behavior.

" You have to calm down, Edward. You being in the hospital along with her isn't going to help."

" I don't give a fuck. The woman I love more than anything could be dying in a fucking hospital bed and I am not going to stop until I get to her." I said, pulling the front door open and jogging out to my car.

The speedy ride to the hospital was awful, and I wondered if this was how she felt when my lung collapsed back in the summer. My heart was racing and I felt like I was going to throw up.

My hands shook, and tears leaked from my eyes but I didn't bother to wipe them from my eyes. I had to get there, and all I could think was that I could lose her without telling her how much I loved her; without telling her how sorry I was that I didn't just fucking tell her.

If I'd told her all of it than she wouldn't have been out at all at this time, she would have been at home; safe with me. A loud sound came from my chest that I couldn't control, and I struggled to hold the wheel straight on the roads. When I got to the hospital I saw the ambulance outside still. I parked the car; not caring at the fact that it was handicapped parking. I ran towards the entrance, but not before taking a look towards the ambulance.

Blood.

It motivated me to move faster and I ran up to the front desk, startling the receptionist who was sitting peacefully in her chair on the computer.

" Isa-Isabella Swan she was just-"

" She just came in. What is your relationship with her?"

" She's my girlfriend." I spluttered out.

A cruel look came upon her eye, and the woman next to her glanced at me really quickly, as if she knew the women in front of me was about to snap at me.

" I'm sorry." the bitch spat, " It's family only for the waiting area. You aren't allowed to-"

" Are you serious Kayla? Mr...?"

" Masen. Edward Masen." I said quickly, not wanting to waste any more time.

The nice woman immediately stood, " Follow me."

I followed her down the hallways that she led me to until we were in the family ICU waiting room. Immediately I saw Leah rise up on her feet and run towards me. She looked like a wreck, and I also saw Sue and fucking Charles Swan there.

" Leah, what happened?" I pleaded with her, needing someone to tell me.

" They were turning left onto Forks main street and it was a green arrow; they had the right of way. And a truck came out of nowhere...It hit right on the passenger side, Edward. Right at Bella." she sobbed, completely crumbling into my arms as her body shook.

" The car flipped over and Jessica isn't nearly as bad as Bella they were saying. I think she has a bad concussion or something but...Bella was rushed into emergency surgery."

Behind me I felt what seemed like the hands of my mother resting on my back and I started to hyperventilate, completely feeling my heart sink into my stomach and everything around me start to wobble and shake.

" Edward, EDWARD! Calm down, it's okay. Everything is going to be okay. It'll be okay."

" N-No you do-don't understand. I nev-never got to...I lo-love her, she can't...She can't leave me...No… She can-can't go."

" Carlisle, get him water. He needs it right now. Go!"

I felt two hands resting on my knee's vaguely, " It's going to be okay, Edward. Bella wouldn't leave you; she loves you, too much."

" You can't do this to yourself, Edward. Breathe deeply."

A hand pushed a cup into mine and I shakily brought it to my lips and drank, feeling the cold water slightly calm me down so that I could breathe somewhat better. Alice took the empty cup from my hands and sat down next to me. My mom was on the other side, holding one of my hands in hers.

Carlisle sat at the seat across from Esme, a seat over from where Leah was.

" Carlisle, can't you do something?" Esme whispered desperately.

He shook his head, " I can't, sweetheart. They already know by now our relation in some way. Even though she's Edward's girlfriend they wouldn't want me to be in there."

I zoned out all of their hushed whispers. All I could think about was Bella.

My beautiful Bella.

This at all wouldn't have happened if I had just been honest with her in the first place, and knowing that absolutely killed me on the inside.

We'd never even had the chance to talk about everything that happened, and I remembered how I'd just walked out of the room when she said she was going to stay with Jess. I didn't tell her that I loved her or anything; I stormed out on her when really she was the one with the right to be angry.

I should have made her stay to talk about it; not walked out on her like the fucking asshole I was. She didn't deserve it at all, and now she was paying the price for the mistake I made.

Leaning forward, I put my head in my hands and taking in a deep shuddering breath. Every single minute felt like a fucking hour, and I heard someone clear their throat and shifting before I glanced up and could sense the uncomfortable gaze of Bella's father.

" What the fuck are you even doing here? You sat in a hospital bed months ago and told her that she was a mistake and you think you have the right to sit here?"

" Watch your mouth, Masen. You don't know not one thing about my relationship with Bella."

" Oh, really? I know that you've hit her, tried to choke her and let's not forget about the way you talk to her. I'm pretty sure that defines the 'relationship' either demolished or non-existent."

A hand rested on my knee, " Edward, now isn't the time."

" Then when is the fucking time? When does he see what the fuck he's done to her? And god her mother doesn't even have a clue about you laying a hand on her; I bet she'd just absolutely enjoy hearing about that."

His eyes hardened at the mention of Bella's mom, " I thought I told you to watch your mouth?"

" Tell me whatever the fuck you want, that doesn't mean I have to listen."

Just then three other people walked into the waiting room, and I saw tears streaked down the woman's face and a man had his arms wrapped around her tightly as if he were the only thing holding her up. She looked a wreck, and the man looked no better. The other kid looked about my age, maybe a year or two older and he had the same worried expression as the other man.

" Esme Cullen?" she said.

" Oh, Cara." my mom whispered, immediately rising to embrace the woman. I figured that she must be Jessica's mom that was the only thing that made sense. The younger guy passed me, and he looked to and he ran his hands over his face and sat in a chair with a sigh.

" Jess's brother?" Alice asked.

He nodded, " Yeah, do you know anything?"

" She isn't nearly as bad as Bella I heard. Maybe a concussion a few broken bones; she's lucky."

" How's Bella?"

Immediately Alice teared up, and I wrapped my arm around her and she leaned into my side, putting her head against my shoulder. Emmett looked a little uncomfortable sitting in the chair, I barely even noticed him here; but he was just sitting in the chair next to Alice with his arms crossed over his chest.

Alice glanced up at me and I blinked the tears from my eyes and took a deep breath.

" She'll be okay, everything will be okay." Alice repeated like a mantra, whispering quietly against my shoulder.

And I prayed to fucking god that what she was saying was true.

Because without Bella…Nothing fucking mattered anymore.

~\\~

Two hours.

It was two hours until we heard everything that had happened and it was the longest of my entire life.

I'd never felt so helpless to do anything, and sitting there waiting to hear if she was going to be alright was grueling. Mr. Swan was staring at me like I was the bane of his existence, and I had been getting relentless texts from Renee for about fifteen minutes before she had gotten on a flight here. She was just as frantic as I had been.

I was surprised that her ex-husband even bothered to call her. He fucking hated her and his own daughter for god's sake. Maybe in the past three hours the man grew a goddamn heart and some compassion for the family that he threw away like trash. I'd always wondered the reason why they divorced, but Bella never talked about it. I wonder if she even new.

After the first hour of waiting we heard news about Jess, and her parents were relieved to hear that she was going to be just fine. She had a very bad concussion, but there was no bleeding or very serious head trauma. There were also three of her ribs broken and her left arm was broken. She also had dislocated her shoulder on the right but it was successfully fixed and back into place. I was glad that Jess was alright, but I honestly wanted to hear from Bella. I was getting impatient and everybody around me could tell.

That was my first priority right now.

When the doctor finally came out everybody was immediately standing on their feet waiting. He was still wearing his scrubs and I could see blood splattered onto it. It streamed down the front, heavily splattered on his pants and there was a smear on his arm that he seemed to have missed. My mother held onto me as if I were about to fall to the floor.

I was sure at that point that I was close to it.

" Isabella Swans family?" he asked.

" Yes."

He took a seat in a chair and motioned for the rest of us to sit down, but I didn't want to sit. I'd been in the fucking chair for hours and I wanted to see Bella; I wanted to be there by her side. The doctor was looking up at us, only sympathy in his eyes for all of us and it made me want to fucking scream.

" You all should sit down for this." he said, giving us a soft look that told us we really should.

I begrudgingly sat down, my leg bouncing and my fingers tugging through my hair roughly.

" Isabella is very, very lucky to even be alive right now." he said, looking over her chart before looking at us. " The truck hit her right side, and a lot of her injuries are stemmed from that side, but her body seemed to have been somewhat facing the door when the impact occurred. I'll explain all of her injuries for you before I let anybody go in to see her at the moment." Everybody nodded in confirmation, waiting for him to continue.

"Her right leg is broken in three different places. Her femur seems to have gotten the brunt of the break and is mostly damaged, and her hip joint is badly fractured on the same leg. Her right humerus, which is the bone in her upper arm, is completely shattered. Her left shoulder was dislocated, and she has four broken ribs, one of which that had punctured through her skin and caused plenty of bleeding. She also has many cuts and punctures in her skin from the metal of the car, along with the glass breaking in her arms and torso."

I felt like the list was never going to end.

" She didn't face any major head injuries, which is something that is most common in accidents like this, but she has a concussion and her neck faced just the slightest of a sprain, not enough for a full brace. It seems like her head was back away and the truck didn't hit hard enough for the car to make her suffer any serious head injuries."

He paused to take in reactions before continuing, " She was rushed into immediate surgery, and we did find internal bleeding from the pelvic area. Basically her entire pelvis is completely shattered along with the heavy bleeding, but we were able to stop it but she had to receive two blood transfusions. Immediate repair surgery was done on her bladder and there was also an emergency appendectomy performed on her because of the damage done from the impact of the car on that area. We had to go in and pick out the damage from the glass and metal and her right arm isn't only broken but very severely cut up, as well as her entire right side and lower body. It seemed as if her left lung collapsed while we rushed her to the hospital, and we were able to help that as well as dress all of the broken injuries. Her arm and leg are in a cast and her midsection wrapped for her ribs. She is also very severely bruised in other places from the car being flipped. We did have to resuscitate her in the ambulance and during surgery, but afterwards she was stable.

I leaned back and took a deep breath, completely overwhelmed at all of this information.

" She is unconscious right now, and we don't plan on attempting to wake her. Her vitals are stable and her body has a lot of recovering to do. We don't know if she will wake up paralyzed or surprise us with something, even though no severe damage was done to her spine, but it was harmed very close to it. As of right now only time will tell how things will be; things are very up in the air for her right now. But from the severe pelvic damage that has occurred here, we are almost a hundred percent sure that Isabella won't have the chance to conceive later in life. I'm very sorry to have to deliver that type of news, but I am sure that she will make it through this, and we are going to do everything we can to help her recover."

I knew that at the word conceive everybody had pointed their eyes on me.

And all I could do was put my head in my hands and cry for not only the damage done to the one I love most, but for the children that I could never give her because of this.

~\\~

" I don't think I've ever seen anybody cry that much."

" Emmett, now isn't the time." Alice scolded

" How would you feel if that were Rosalie? God, Em, he probably won't even have the chance to have a family with her."

I leaned forward and pressed a kiss to Bella's hand, leaning my head against her bruised left arm. Her small hand was warm, and that was encouraging. She was wrapped in my gold blanket from home that Esme had brought, and it was keeping her warm.

Hearing the damage was nothing like seeing it. Her entire body was bruised, and the only part of her that didn't look like it was going to break apart was her beautiful face. She had a bruise on her cheek and shallow cut on her temple, but otherwise her face looked normal. But she hadn't moved at all in the past two days. They said her brain activity was fine, no signs of brain damage; it was just a matter on when she was prepared to wake up. Right now her body was in too much pain for her to handle right now so they were medicating her to keep her asleep, but she could still wake up because it wasn't that strong.

" How's Bella today?" I heard a quiet voice whisper beside me.

I looked over and saw Renee, and she looked pretty tired right now. She was staying at my parent's house right now, it was just easier for everybody that way. My mom was nice enough to offer because she felt bad for making Renee stay at Charlie's.

" I wish she was awake to tell you herself."

She sat on the other side of the bed and rested her hand on Bella's casted leg gently.

" She's the luckiest girl in the world to have you right here every day by her side, Edward. You're going to be the one to get her through this, honey."

I was fucking crying again, and I hated that I couldn't seem to stop it for more than ten minutes. I was supposed to be strong for Bella, not weak. For the past few days all I had been doing was holding her hand, watching her and crying like a little child.

And fuck if Emmett wasn't making me feel like I was a little girl for it. Alice was constantly defending me for it, but I knew it was because she didn't want me sailing my fucking fist into Emmett's face. I couldn't handle keeping all of the emotions in, they were all-consuming and too much for me to handle.

" It's okay to cry. This is going to be just as hard on you as on Bella."

" What if she wanted a family? We never talked about it but..."

I knew that struck a chord in Renee because tears were falling down her cheeks within a few seconds before she ran her hand gently over Bella's cheek. I was glad I wasn't the only one feeling so awful about that subject.

" I want grandchildren more than anything, sweetheart, but it's a small price to pay not to have them and to keep Bella; I'd rather have her here and not able to than have to be sitting in a funeral home as we speak picking out flower arrangements. I just hope emotionally she'll be able to handle this. She's always been a strong young girl, but this is too much for someone to handle.

Carlisle and Emmett walked into the room after being out in the hall for awhile. A big reason why everybody was around for Bella to wake up was because of the fact that there was a possibility she could be paralyzed from her waist down; and this thought was the most terrifying for me. I knew that if that were the case that Bella would never be the same again, no matter what anybody did.

Nothing could fix that.

The doctors weren't sure at all, and she hadn't faced any serious spinal injuries but considering her pelvis shattering and all of the other injuries, there was a small chance that she could be paralyzed. The fact that she hadn't moved an inch over the past two days wasn't encouraging to anybody, but we were still hoping for the best.

The room was quiet besides the sound of Bella's heart monitor and her oxygen machine. They said tomorrow they were going to get her off of it and have her start to breathe on her own to see how well she'd do.

Jess was still in the hospital right now, and she would be for another week because they were closely evaluating her mostly because of the concussion she suffered from. She wasn't in ICU anymore, but in a regular room unlike Bella. Every half hour a nurse was coming in to check on Bella to assure she was doing well because she was still in ICU right now.

I hadn't left her side since the night she was admitted, and I endured showering here and sleeping in an uncomfortable chair; but none of it mattered because I wouldn't leave Bella's side until she was healed and back to the way she was supposed to be.

Esme was bringing food a few times a day.

Hospital food was absolutely nothing to be desired.

I looked at Bella, her face unmoving and still. All pale skin and ruby red lips, and even then she was the most beautiful woman I'd ever seen. I touched the ends of her long brown hair and put my hand on her arm, rubbing it gently and hoping that somewhere inside of her she knew that I was here.

" I'm going to get some coffee. Would you like some?" I asked Renee, standing slowly.

" No thank you, sweetheart. Take your time."

I leaned down and placed a kiss on Bella's forehead before leaving the room with a sigh. At the cafeteria I poured a big cup of coffee and stirred in creamer with the fucking small plastic sticks they provided. After grabbing two packets of sugar I made my way back to the room.

As I walked back I ran into Angela who was carrying a bouquet of flowers with Ben by her side; giving me a feeble smile.

" How is she today?"

" Still asleep, no sign of waking up right now but the doctors think that it's going to do her well to sleep for another day or two."

We walked into the room and Angela greeted Renee, and Bella; as if she were awake. I was glad that someone was able to act normal around here; it didn't make everything so depressing. The daisies brightened up the room and she set them next to the pitcher of ice water.

" I saw Jess today, she's doing pretty good...She feels absolutely awful about Bella...Her mom says that she's been crying a lot, and praying for Bella in the morning and at night. Jess praying is definitely something to talk about." Angela said, sitting in a plush chair in the room as Ben sat on the arm of it.

" Everybody had better be praying right now." Renee said, grasping her daughter's hand.

" She's strong, I know she'll be alright." Angela said.

Just then my mom, Alice and Leah entered the room and Renee smiled over at Bella.

" Everybody is here for you, baby. We're all going to be here when you wake up." Renee said clearly.

Just then Bella's heart rate started to speed up just the slightest as it showed on the monitor, and everybody in the room froze as we looked towards her face for some sign that she could possibly be waking up. But she was still; the only things telling us she was still here with us was her heart monitor and the warmth of her skin

" Bella, I love you." I tried, hoping to get a response. Her heart started to pick up once again and Esme broke out in a smile, I followed after and pressed a kiss to the top of Bella's soft hand.

" Didn't I tell you that she could hear you?" she whispered, moving to stand behind me and rest her hands on my shoulders.

Alice had brought a huge bouquet of bright wild flowers that really made a statement, and I saw Leah holding a crumbled box from Tiffany's and a Victoria's Secret bag in her hand.

" They found this in Jessica's trunk. Jess said these belonged to Bella, but the Tiffany bag is for you Edward; for your Birthday."

She'd gone out shopping to get a gift for me on my Birthday.

And in that moment I felt like the most colossal asshole, and immediately Alice slapped my arm harshly as if she knew what was going through my head.

" Don't you dare blame yourself for this because she had gone out to get you a gift. I swear to god, Edward Anthony!"

I felt the sting of tears and I lifted up Bella's hand, pressing another small kiss to the top of it before resting my forehead against it, holding her fingers delicately between mine. It was almost as if I could break her tiny little fingers if I held them too hard.

I didn't look in the bag; I wanted her to be awake if I looked at it, but in the Victoria's Secret bag there were a few of her favorite cotton nightgowns. I hoped maybe they'd let us change her into one so she would be more comfortable.

Until then it was all a game of waiting.

~\\~

It was the end of the fourth day of Bella being here, and at this point a lot of us were getting antsy.

Today Bella had moved her hand and fingers, and lightly gripped my hand while I held it. This morning I had woken up to the feeling, and it was just a small amount of pressure; but I'd never been so fucking happy in my entire life. Renee broke down crying when Bella did it for her; everybody was in awe.

The doctors said that she should be waking up within a day or two now, but not to get our hopes up. I couldn't wait to look into her beautiful brown eyes, tell her how much I loved her and know that she heard it for sure. I left her side for just a moment so I could change my clothes and brush my teeth before settling into the plush chair and ottoman next to her bed. I lay back against the pillow and traced her arm with my finger.

" You have to wake up for me tomorrow, love. I need to see your beautiful eyes and for you to tell me that you'll be okay...It's going to be a long road but I promise you I'll never leave your side. I'm never going to give up on you for as long as I live. I'm so sorry for not being honest with you, Bella. You wouldn't be here if I hadn't just been honest in the first place." I murmured, choking up as I paused.

" I love you, Bella. I know I've probably made you question that, but I do. I love you more than anything in this world and that's why you have to wake up. Someday I want you walking down the aisle towards me." I wiped a tear as I thought about children, but I stopped the train of thought quickly, " You can't leave me before you become my wife. I can't allow you to do it. I won't. " I said, laughing quietly at the end.

Just then the nurse came in and she was giving Bella another dose of medicine for pain. It was a quick five minute process and her nurse, Laila, who came during the night, was absolutely the best. She was super nice to everybody in here, even when it got bit crowded with family the first hour she was here, because after eight visiting hours were completely over. Only I was allowed to be here.

" She's going to wake up tomorrow; I just know it." she told me as she inserted a needle into the IV to let the medicine travel into Bella's system.

" I hope so."

~\\~

_Beep.. Beep_

_._

_Beep.. Beep_

" Edward, sweetheart; I think Bella is starting to wake up." I heard a gentle voice whisper close to my ear.

My eyes opened and in the room I saw Renee, my mom, Carlisle and everybody else in the room. Alice was sitting next to me on the chair I slept in and I ran my hand through my hair and leaned towards Bella's bed as I yawned, still coming to, but not wanting to miss it if Bella woke up.

" Alice made sure we all came; she had a feeling this morning Bella would wake up." my mom said, resting her hand on my leg.

I looked over and saw Bella's eyes twitching and her lips were moving just the slightest. I shifted closer to her and took her hand in mine, feeling absolutely terrified and excited at the same time to finally see her wake up. I needed to hear her voice, or at least hear something from her. Even if it was just a sigh.

" Wake up, Bella." I whispered quietly.

Her shoulders moved and immediately her body recoiled from the pain it felt and then her eyes slowly lazed open and she looked around the room slowly. She looked slightly confused, but she looked around for awhile, everybody was dead silent.

In what felt like forever, her eyes finally landed on me. And just like that her heart monitor went into full speed and everybody in the room let out a gasp as her lifted from mine and she reached out just slightly to touch my cheek from where my head lay near the delicate fingers of her hand.

**Authors Note- So, let me know all of your thoughts! If you have any questions feel free to leave it in a review, or PM me if you want an immediate response to it!**

**But definitely review, tell me your thoughts ( I love long reviews to read!) and I really hope you guys liked it. This chapter was HARD to write. **

**REVIEWS get TEASERS!**


	38. You Picked Me

**Authors Note- Happy Friday everybody! I hope you enjoy this upcoming chapter!**

**Disclaimer- S. Meyer owns all things Twilight.**

**Chapter Song: You Picked Me by: A Fine Frenzy**

~\\~

EPOV

~\\~

The room was silent as Bella's warm hand laid against my cheek, and she let out a quiet sigh as she kept her eyes locked on mine, and I reached up to touch her hand before moving to kiss the palm of it, closing my eyes tightly as the tears welled up. She was wincing in pain from her shoulder so I quickly set her hand down next to her, still keeping my hand over hers for comfort and warmth.

And I didn't want to fucking let her go.

" Did I miss your Birthday?" were the first words that came from her mouth.

Everybody let out a quiet laugh and I opened my eyes, shaking my head.

" No, baby, you didn't." I assured her.

" W-What day is it?" she asked.

" June 19th, Thursday morning." Carlisle spoke up. " You've been out for four days, Bella."

She started to gasp for breath and I leaned closer to her, reaching out to gently stroke the side of her face with my hand. Her skin was soft and warm underneath my touch.

" It's okay, Bella. Calm down." I whispered.

" Jess...Where is she? Is she okay?"

" She's just fine, she'll be out of the hospital soon."

She leaned her head into the pillow and closed her eyes, looking absolutely exhausted and spent. I couldn't blame her. I felt her grasp my hand weakly and rest it on her side near her hip.

" Everything hurts."

" I know, honey. We'll get a nurse in right now." Renee said reassuringly,

Alice sprung up on her feet and stepped out of the room to walk to the nurses' station which was only around the corner from the room we were currently in. It was lucky we were so close, then again there was stations close enough because it was the ICU unit.

" Mom?"

Renee gave a watery smile, " I'm right here, baby girl. Right here."

" Mom, I saw-I saw Grandma she told me...told me not to stay with her." Bella gasped out.

Renee covered her mouth and tears fell freely down her face. My mom went over and rubbed her arms, leaning close to whisper something in her ear before pulling away. Whatever she said seemed to help pull Renee together more and she sighed, giving Bella a watery smile.

" That's right, baby. You had to come back to us."

Bella's eyes went back to me, and the smallest smile came over her face, " You told me you wanted to marry me; that's why I had to." she said, her voice dropping down to a whisper.

I smiled at her, opening my mouth to respond before she started to speak.

" I can't talk anymore." she murmured. " Too…tired."

" That's okay, just rest, Bella."

Just then Alice came back in with Dr. Gerandy, he held Bella's chart and stepped into the room with a smile upon seeing Bella awake.

" Someone came to tell me that you woke up. How do you feel, Isabella?"

She looked over at me pleadingly to answer for her, and I looked up at the doctor.

" She said everything hurts."

And for some reason he actually smiled more, " Isabella, we were very afraid that you could have been paralyzed from the waist down. Are you able to feel this?" he asked, putting his thumb and forefinger on her right ankle and applying pressure.

" Yes." she said, " Unfortunately I can feel...everything. How bad?"

Tears fell down her face as she asked how bad, and in that moment everybody in the room seemed to have lost any excitement over the fact that Bella had woken up; because there were so many things that she had to find out.

And I knew that I was going to have to be the one to tell her that there was more than a ninety percent chance that she would never be able to have children. Every time that thought popped into my mind I fucking lost all self-control I had; and this time was no exception.

" Don't cry." she whispered feebly, closing her eyes slowly.

" We don't want to overwhelm you since you've just woken up, but I'd like to talk to you about some of your injuries." the doctor said softly.

She nodded slowly and turned her head towards him.

" We'll start from the top and work our way to the bottom." he said, trying to get a laugh out of someone, but everybody was silent, " Alright, well you have just minor cut on your forehead from the glass windows in the car breaking, along with a few others on your arms that were easily treatable with bandages. Your left shoulder was dislocated, and your right humerous bone had completely shattered, which is your upper bone in your arm, as well as deep cuts from the glass that were imbedded into your skin. You've suffered four broken ribs and a collapsed lung which we were very lucky to be able to help due to all your other injuries. Your pelvis was also very severely shattered and when you came in you were having serious internal bleeding in your pelvic area, which made us have to give you a few blood transfusions because of the loss."

I held her hand tighter as she squeezed her eyes shut, trying to ingest all of this information.

" Your right leg is broken in three different places, the femur getting most of the damage but your hip joint in that leg is severely fractured. There is no doubt that you won't ever be able to walk on it again; but you are going to have to be careful of course we'll talk more about that once you start healing and doing physical therapy. Luckily, you only faced a slight sprain in your neck and a minor concussion. It seemed like your head was away from the seat when the truck hit; which saved you from a serious head injury."

" Is that it?"

He sighed, looking down at the chart forlornly before looking at Bella.

" Due to the pelvic damage which effected your sex organs, we are-"

Carlisle cleared his throat, " We'll talk about this at another time."

" Please just tell me now; I need to know everything." Bella cried softly, tears dripping down her chin.

I can't handle this.

I can't see the look in her eyes when she hears it.

Esme rested her hand on Carlisle's shoulder and on Alice's back, " How about we step out of the room and let Edward talk to her, okay?"

Renee shook her head defiantly. " I'm not leaving my daughter if she has to hear this."

" Renee, please. It would be easier on both of them, you can come right back in." Esme pleaded.

Dr. Gerandy shifted his weight, " In about ten minutes I'll have your daily nurse come in to give you some medicine; but you are to rest and we will be checking in on you often. I'll leave you to your family and we can go in-depth about treatment a little later." he said politely before stepping out of the room.

" You're all scaring me." Bella gasped out.

" Bella, this can wait." I assured her.

" No, it can't. Not when you all have a look on your face that..."

Renee stood up from her chair and leaned forward to kiss Bella's cheek, " I'll be right back, sweetie. I love you so much." she whispered before following Esme and the rest of them from the door.

Alice gave me a look, as if she were telling me that I had to be strong and spit it out. But I felt my chest constricting and it was getting harder to breath. My heart pounded in my chest so hard that I was sure Bella could hear it next to me.

Her eyes were solely on me now, her hand in mine telling me that she needed to know everything; the last bit of news that I hoped wouldn't completely tear her into pieces. I choked in a breath of air and leaned forward, pressing my palm against her temple before sliding my fingers through her hair.

" Why are you crying like that?" she asked, her own tears still falling silently down her face.

I wiped my face and leaned back, resting my other hand on top of hers so that it was between both of mine.

" Bella...When your pelvis shattered...Fuck, baby, there isn't any way to tell you this the right way. But when your pelvis shattered from the impact of being hit, it damaged your reproductive organs they said...They said they are about one hundred percent sure that you won't ever be able to conceive."

She was still and her eyes went to look towards the wall in front of her; her entire expression going completely blank.

" And I've felt sick about since I heard it. I never wanted this to happen, god, Bella I'm so sorry."

I reached over to wipe the tears streaming down her face, trying to catch them but there was no stopping it. I stood and went to sit at the edge of the bed so that I could be closer to her.

" I'm not upset at the fact that I can't have children; I just can't stand the thought of never being able to have _your _children or never being able to have the chance." she whispered before she started breaking down into sobs, but it was too painful for her ribs for her to even be able to without searing pain. She gasped and laid back, the heart-breaking sadness in her eyes enough for me to want to go off the deep end.

" Why did this happen to me? Why me?" she cried.

I put my hands on either side of her cheeks, leaning closely to her.

" I promise you that I will be here with you through everything. We're going to do this together and I know it's going to be hard, and at times you're going to want to give up but I'll always be right beside you knowing you can do it."

" How can you love me when...when..."

" I'm going to tell you exactly what your mom told me. You having a strong chance at not being able to have children is better than us sitting in a funeral home picking out flowers for your funeral. Bella, you could be dead right now. I could have lost any type of future with you. I'd rather have a future with you not including kids then no future with you at all."

Her eyes were slipping closed, and I didn't try to stop her. She was going to cope in her own fucking way; I couldn't change that. About two minutes later the nurse came in and injected her IV with medicine, she quietly told me that it would make Bella sleepy and I was glad for that.

The more sleep she got the better she'd be.

The more she'd heal.

And the less pain she'd have to deal with.

~\\~

June 20th

~\\~

The day of Bella waking up seemed to have drug on very slowly, and she had been asleep most of the day after being up for just about that twenty minutes yesterday. I wanted her to get her rest, so I never woke her once to bother her. But I would kiss her temple and hold her hand as she slept.

I woke up before her the next day and got dressed, thinking maybe over the weekend I'd go home and use my own shower. Though I hated leaving Bella, so many people were here for her if I left for an hour. I wanted more than anything to take her home with me; but she needed more care here and it would be awhile before she could be home.

When I came back in Dr. Gerandy was there talking with a now awake Bella; and he smiled when he saw me.

" Edward, I was just telling Bella about her future treatment."

I set my towel in the bag of dirty clothes and sat down in the chair I was starting to hate. I was supposed to pass for a chair you could also sleep on, but it was fucking uncomfortable. But I'd deal with it for Bella.

" Oh, yeah?"

" Baby, I don't want to be here for two months. What about school?" she whispered quietly, and I could tell she wanted to fall back asleep.

" We won't worry about that. And who knows, maybe it'll be earlier. If you just rest properly and eat well that will change."

Dr. Gerandy nodded, " Yes, proper nutrition and rest is important. The good thing is that you are a healthy young woman and that will dimish a lot of healing time. Your arm is anywhere from four to six weeks, and your pelvis will be roughly seven to ten, but depending on those important factors I mentioned; it most likely won't be the maximum amount. About your femur, well, it is the biggest and strongest bone in your body and that one will be twelve weeks or more. Of course afterwards you are going to be taking a lot of physical therapy classes in order to get proper use of your leg back and it will take plenty of time to get back to normal but it can happen."

" What about my ribs?"

" Anywhere from four to eight weeks; I'll be honest with you Bella, the next four to five months are going to be very trying for you but eventually you will be alright with proper care."

Bella nodded and Dr. Gerandy stood and shook my hand, " I'll be in to check in with her tomorrow. In a few days we can talk about getting her out of ICU, but we still want to keep a close eye on her for the next forty eight hours at least." he said in a low voice to me.

I nodded and he gave me a short lipped smile before walking out of the room.

" Today's your Birthday." I heard Bella say behind me.

I turned around and looked at her, " Yeah."

" I'm sorry that you have to be here."

" Don't you dare apologize. I wouldn't regret it for anything, Bella."

She nodded lazily towards the window where two bags lay. The one from Tiffany's and the one from Victoria's Secret.

" Blue one; it's for you." she said. " I hope it wasn't ruined."

I walked over and grabbed the somewhat crushed bag, and I went to sit at the edge of her bed to open it up. She smiled as I pulled out all of the tissue paper out and I picked up another box, it was a tiffany blue color and it was fucking heavy. I opened it up and saw a sturdy leather case, and inside of it was a brand new watch.

It was the best fucking gift ever.

" On the back." she said, moving her left arm that was now in a sling as of yesterday since it was dislocated. The doctors had only let her arm free before because she had been asleep and until last night she said it was more comfortable on her side; but since she was moving around they didn't want her doing anything in her sleep to cause pain.

I turned the watch around, my fingers running over the black alligator design and saw on the back that it said ' Love Always, Isabella'.

And just like that it was fucking perfect.

I smiled and clasped the watch on my wrist before leaning forward to place a kiss on her lips. God, it felt like forever since I'd been able to do that.

" Thank you so much, beautiful. The cost must have been-"

" Shhh." she whispered, " It's alright. I'm just glad you like it."

" I love it, Bella. Thank you." I whispered reverently, leaning forward to kiss her again.

She had turned her head away from me, " I want to brush my teeth desperately."

I grabbed a plastic bowl, a bottle of water, a toothbrush from a random fucking drawer and my toothpaste. She looked at me as if I were insane; then again she was drugged up on medicine so everything was probably insane for her.

" I'll help you out here."

.

.

.

" This is weird." Bella said as I brushed her teeth, cleaning them thoroughly so that she wouldn't complain about missing places. It was harder than it looked, brushing someone's teeth for them, but we somehow were able to do it without making a big mess.

Once I was done she spit into the bowl and I wiped the corner of her mouth before cleaning out the bowl and tossing out the paper towel that she also used.

" Thank you, that is so much better." she said, leaning back in bed.

" My mom is probably bringing you some easy food to eat today. Do you want that or something from here?"

" Do you even have to ask?" she asked, closing her eyes and shifting her left arm, wincing as she did.

I sat down in the chair next to her bed, solely the place where I spent most of my life these days. I wished I could crawl into that fucking bed next to her; maybe then I could actually sleep a good night.

" You should sleep at home."

" I don't want to."

" I feel ba-"

" Don't. I want to be here. And in a few weeks you'll be able to come home, maybe a little earlier if Carlisle can find a way to get you off the hook."

She laid back and nodded at me, " I know. I just feel bad because I've been sleeping all day and you've been so patient."

" Baby, I want you to sleep. That way your body can heal and you won't be in so much pain as you are when you are awake."

" I love you."

" I love you, too."

Bella was trying to shift her body in the bed to get comfortable, but she gasped in pain, paralyzed as it coursed through her body. I immediately rested my hand against her neck, looking into her eyes and hoping that it would ground her.

Tears welled up in her eyes from the pain and it fucking hurt to see her in so much pain. I didn't want this for her at all, and she didn't deserve it in the least.

" Want one of these pillows behind you gone?"

She nodded, biting her lip as I held her up just slightly as I grabbed the pillow, then helped her slowly lay back before adjusting the bed a little further down so she could be more comfortable. I called the nurse in and immediately Bella got a look on her face that was pleading with me not to.

" She's in a lot of pain today. Is there any way we can up her doses or make them more frequent?"

" Oh, of course. I'll be back in just a minute."

Once she left the room Bella weakly glared at me, " Edward, no. It's your Birthday I don't want to be..."

" You sleeping is what I want for my Birthday. I want you to rest and sleep so that you can get better and heal."

When the nurse returned she smiled at Bella and injected the medicine into her IV swiftly.

" This is a little stronger, sweetie. So it'll probably make you a little drowsy but try not to fight it off."

She nodded in understanding and the nurse left us quickly after. Bella's let out a small yawn and I reached for my gold blanket, unraveling it from it being folded at the side of the hospital bed. I draped it carefully over Bella, covering her all up and resting it above her shoulders.

" Thank you for taking care of me." she whispered before she slowly drifted off, squeezing my hand just the slightest.

" I'll always take care of you." I promised.

~\\~

Three Weeks Later

July 11th

~\\~

" She was crying this morning, one of the nurses was able to talk to her for a bit and calm her down." the nurse told me as I walked down to Bella's room.

Bella wasn't in ICU anymore, but instead placed in a nice room in the hospital; and so far things healing wise were going very well. Dr. Gerandy has been very impressed with how well her bones have been healing and how much progress she's done in the time she's been here, which is just a few days short of being a month now.

Emotionally, I know that she isn't doing well and I can see it in her eyes every day I come in here. It's not only her frustration getting to her about being here constantly, but she's been struggling with the news that I had to break to her weeks ago; and it was fucking tearing me apart seeing her like that.

Everybody was trying to be here for her as much as they could, but honestly; I was the only person she could fucking stand right now. When Esme would come in and try to make her talk about it she only got angry, and I can't even begin to explain how she acted when her mother attempted.

Let's just say it's not a topic of conversation anymore.

Renee had gone home about a week after the accident, but she calls me routinely to get an update on how everything is going and talks to Bella every few days. I think she understood that time and space is what will help Bella right now. It was what was best for everybody involved and I didn't want to see everybody around her getting hurt because she snapped at them about trying to comfort her.

She knew I wouldn't let her pull away from me.

When I got to her room she was laying down with her eyes closed, and I saw all of the flowers literally on almost every surface around her room; enveloping the room in a sweet flowery scent that didn't make everything feel as depressing.

Luckily she was starting to get some of her color back in her cheeks, and even though she was medicated she wasn't constantly dozing in and out of sleep every five-ten minutes which was kind of nice. It was lonely sitting in a room with her sleeping. I finally started going home and doing things such as showering or taking a power nap; Bella insisted on it because I was starting to look like a dead person as she'd so eloquently put it.

The moment I walked in her eyes opened and immediately brightened. I set down the food container on her bedside table and leaned forward to give her a long kiss; enjoying the feeling of her warm lips on mine.

" Hey, baby." I murmured quietly, kissing her temple before pulling away.

" Hi." she said quietly.

I sat down by her side and took her hand in mine, and she knew by the look in my eyes that I knew and she sighed deeply before leaning her head back and closing here eyes.

" Edward, I don't wa-"

" Tell me what it was about."

" Nothing."

" Talk to me."

Her eyes started to water and I gripped her hand in mine, " Please." I pleaded with her, wanting to hear something from her. Anything.

" I just keep having this dream where you keep leaving me." she whispered brokenly, " And when I woke up and saw you gone I got so scared and I thought that..."

" I'll make sure I'll wake you before I leave...Or I can just start showering here again, okay? I don't want you to be scared."

" Don't make compromises for me; I promise I'm fine."

I leaned forward and kissed her forehead, " I'll make sure to leave you a note or something, okay? And I'll let you know where I am going and when I leave."

" I don't want you to have to go through all the trouble."

" It's none at all, baby. I promise you."

Just by looking at her I knew that she was bothered that I was trying to do these things for her; but if that was what it took to make her nightmares and crying dissipate then I was going to go great lengths for her. And it wasn't a problem.

She brushed the corner of her eye with her un-casted arm and I smiled at her.

" How's the pain today?"

" It feels like someone stabbed me in my stomach really bad." she sighed, laying back.

" It'll get better."

" Being here doesn't make anything any easier."

This was true, and I hoped that soon she could come home so that I could take care of her. We'd both probably be more comfortable and get some actual sleep. Esme was already talking about it and she said Bella could still stay in the guest bedroom, she'd have a bathroom and I'd be home so I could get her food when she needed.

" Just a few more weeks."

Seeing tears well up in her eyes broke my heart, and I gave her a weak smile, " I know that's not what you want to hear, but you have to heal better. Classes start September 1st for you and the Thursday before for I start. The more you rest and let the doctors give you the medicine you need," I added, giving her a pointed look, " Then the sooner you'll be able to get back on track. School isn't as important as you are, but I don't want things to be harder then need be."

" I'm pretty sure things can't get worse at this point, Edward." she whispered feebly.

" I know." I told her, my voice cracking, " Nothing has been fair and you've lost...a lot...But I've still been here, right? Every minute of the day even though it doesn't really make things better especially because of the fucking shit I pulled. If it weren't for me you wouldn't be here right now."

" Don't blame yourself, Edward. Please, don't."

" If I had told you about my past, then you wouldn't have been out with Jess that day. You would have been home with me; safe and sound."

She shook her head, " No. It's not your fault at all. I shouldn't have just up and left; we should have talked it through."

" Bella, I fucked up. Not you."

" How about we both fucked up. We didn't handle either of the situations well. You should have told me everything but you didn't, and I shouldn't have just taken the easy way out and left but I did."

" Or we could blame that fucking truck."

" What ever happened with that guy?" she asked.

I'd completely forgotten that we hadn't even really told Bella any details about the truck, we'd found everything out two days after she was admitted into the hospital. We were so focused on her waking up that we didn't even give a fuck about that guy.

" He lost control of the car because he was drinking. He was charged with a DUI and a hefty ticket and is responsible for all the Medical costs of you and Jess. Also did twenty days in jail but that's over with now and his license is suspended for awhile."

She nodded, " Good. If he fucks up me being able to walk properly then I'll go back and kill him."

" Bella, no..." I said, tugging my hands through my hair.

" You've been dressing like a hobo these days."

I looked down at my jeans, and they weren't fucking skinny jeans, but regular ones that hung against my skinny bones. And I was pretty sure the plaid button up I was wearing was being worn for the second or possibly third time without being washed. The only thing I could identify as freshly cleaned was my undershirt and underwear.

I really didn't give a fuck.

" So?"

" What happened to the skinny jeans...v-necks and leather jackets?"

" Baby, I toss on whatever I can find so I can get to you quick."

Bella smiled slightly, " Yeah?"

I nodded, " Mhm. So I could bother with my fucking hair or put on better clothes..."

" Cleaner clothes?" she corrected, fighting a laugh

I tugged on the buttons of the button up I wore and tossed it off, tossing it on the end of her bed and leaving myself in the white v-neck undershirt.

" Better?"

" I love you."

" I'll take that as a yes. And I love you so much more than anything."

" Take off that hat. What is it, Baltimore Orioles? Since when do you wear caps?"

I glared playfully at her, " I got this hat when I was a kid, and I loved it so much. Figured I'd put a hat on instead of make you stare at my long ass hair."

" It is getting long." she marveled, " Mine is no better though."

Her finger touched a wavy end that was already below her waist. It was the longest I'd ever seen her hair ever, but she knew I liked it long.

" It's never been this long before."

" I like it."

" Like it? Babe, I haven't been able to take a proper shower in what feels like forever. My hair looks gross."

I rolled my eyes, " Didn't Alice bring you like..Dry shampoo or some shit?"

" I can't use both my hands."

I stood up and walked over to her bedside table, rifling through it until I found a small black can labeled dry shampoo. On the back it said to spray into roots or whatever, and to shake it thoroughly beforehand. I awkwardly kneeled on the edge of the bed and reached out towards her hair. It wasn't that bad, but I sprayed it as it said and Bella winced at the surprise cold spray. I shook it through her hair and brought it down all of her hair just for the hell of it.

After that I combed it through, which took a good five or so minutes to get it completely smooth, but it did feel cleaner and it smelled pretty fucking good.

" Having fun?" she asked as I combed through her hair.

" Mmhm."

" Here's a challenge for you, put it in a ponytail to the side."

Four tries later I did just that, and I knew if Bella could she would have started uncontrollably laughing at how much I fucking sucked at doing such a simple task. Afterwards I helped her put some moisturizer on her face as she called it, and carefully put lotion on her somewhat good arm, it was basically healed from being dislocated.

Just as I was rubbing lotion into the already soft sole of her foot, feeling like a fucking slave, my mom walked in carrying a bag; stifling a giggle at the sight of me.

" Do we need to add a little more polish to her nails, Edward?"

The other day Alice had come in and completely did a pedicure on Bella while she was passed out on meds, and I knew my mom thought it was funny to tease me about doing these things for Bella.

" Shut it." I said, wiping my hands on a clean towel before slipping on a short white sock on Bella's delicate foot.

I washed my hands, not wanting the flowery scent of lotion on my hands and saw Esme setting out some food for Bella to eat.

" You'd better eat, Bella. It'll help you get healthy."

Over the past few weeks her stomach was completely out of order, everything she tried to eat came back up unless it was applesauce. Her body completely rejected it, but she needed it more than anything.

" I'll try." she said weakly.

I kissed my mom's cheek, thanking her for bringing in some lunch for us and grabbed a fork, seeing the small rice grains in the container that was mixed with small pieces of broccoli. It was very light, so hopefully Bella could eat some of it.

" I have to head back to the house, but Alice is bringing dinner by for you guys alright?"

" Yeah, sure thing. Thanks ma."

She kissed Bella's cheek and the top of my head before leaving us alone. I helped Bella eat, and I was able to get five full bites down her before she said she needed to stop because she was feeling really sick to her stomach.

" Thank god they got rid of the fucking catheter a few days ago." she mumbled.

" Was it awkward peeing with me next to you?"

" Edward, that's not funny." she glared.

I laughed anyways before leaning forward to kiss her softly. It was inevitable that I'd get lost in her strawberry scent and take it a little bit further than I should have; but I couldn't help myself. Her lips were so soft and her tongue was wet and warm against mine; reminding me of all our times together.

I pulled away from her and she struggled for breath. I cursed myself and she moved her arm carefully to rest over her mid-section.

" Bad idea. I'm sorry." I told her quickly.

Just then Dr. Gerandy came in, pausing for a moment at the door before entering, " Is it alright if I come in."

" Yeah, of course."

Bella looked over at him with a tight smile as he walked closer to her.

" I was just outside talking with your nurse today and she told me that she thinks we could start lowering the dose slightly on your medication; how does that sound?"

" Good. I'd like to be awake during the day." she said.

He spent the next ten minutes looking over her injuries, checking her left arm to see how the dislocated shoulder was, and he said it was basically completely healed. Her right arm was still casted but he still picked her arm up to check how she was tolerating any pain. They were going to do an x-ray of her ribs next week to see how they were healing. He also checked her breathing and got her to sit up a little higher in the bed. I could tell how much pain she was in but she bit her lip and took the challenges.

" I know you are in a lot of pain, but we don't want to just let you lay here. We need to get your body used to moving around a little."

She nodded in understanding, " Yeah...Is there any way that I could maybe put on some regular clothes? This hospital gown is just...floating around me."

" I don't see why not. I suggest shorts or a nightgown. You shouldn't try and put on sweatpants over your leg cast and we still want to be able to come in and examine you when we can. I'm sure a nightgown would be the best option because of your pelvic fractures we don't want anything pressing against it such as a tight waistband or anything of the sort."

Bella nodded in understanding, " Okay...And when...When will I be able to go home?"

" If things progress how they are, two weeks as long as you are going to be under constant care at home."

" She will be. I won't leave her side."

He nodded, " I'm sure that she has a great support system. And as I said, if things continue to progress we can consider letting you leave. Of course you will have to have regular routine visits here at the hospital but we would like to get you out of here and hopefully settled nicely at home. Once everything is healed you will have to start Physical Therapy, but until then I'm sure Mr. Masen here could assist you in bending your legs and moving your body a few times during the week to get you going a little more until then."

After a few more minutes he disappeared from the room, shutting the door securely behind him and Bella looked over at me, " Can you get one of my nightgowns or something, I need to get out of this ugly fucking green shit."

" Okay, okay."

I got up and grabbed a bag that Alice had packed full of comfortable clothes for Bella, and the only thing that wasn't a pair of shorts was a baby doll nightgown that was purple with white lace trim at the top and thin straps. It wasn't at all see-through, mostly made out of cotton and pretty soft. I showed it to Bella and she sighed.

" I love Alice, but sometimes she is just too much."

I smiled and stepped over to her, " Do you want me to get a nurse or?..."

" Edward there isn't anything under here that you haven't seen before."

" I'm just trying to be nice, Jesus christ." I said teasingly, kissing her nose before adjusting her bed so that she was sitting up more. I took off the blanket covering her and inched up her nightgown over her bulky cast. She was wearing a pair of boy short underwear, but unable to wear a bra because she had bandages all the way up to her fucking boobs, no joke.

I'm a fucking guy, I couldn't not stare. But any patch of skin I saw like her shoulders or behind them had small scrapes and bruises. I carefully helped her sit forward, but apparently went too fast because she gasped loudly and stilled.

" Oh god, Edward. You have to be careful." she gasped, holding onto the bed.

" I'm sorry, baby. Hold on."

I slipped the gown over her head and pulled it down over her front, carefully adjusting the top where it went in just slightly so it wouldn't touch the bandages just above so she was covered. Afterwards I had to basically lift her up so I could get it underneath her. By the time the task was finished she was out of breath, and fuck so was I!

After adjusting the straps on her delicate shoulders I grabbed the gold blanket and laid it over her legs.

" Is that better?"

She nodded, " Yes. Thank you."

" The purple matches the bruises, sweetheart."

I saw her eyes roll and I was desperate to kiss her again like I had before, but I fought the urge to and instead leaned back in my chair.

" Why do you always sit in that chair when there is a perfectly comfortable looking couch across from the bed."

" It's not close to you."

I saw her small smile and I reached over to take her hand, kissing her knuckles softly and resting my head next to her hand.

Never would I leave her side if I never had to. She was where I was meant to be, and I wouldn't compromise that.

Bella is my everything.

**Authors Note- I hope you guys all enjoyed the chapter! I just wanted to touch base in this chapter on a few things that needed to be discussed, and what not. I wish you guys a great weekend and I will be updating within the next 7-9 days or so!**

**SIDE NOTE- I know this is a little late into the story, but I've been wondering if maybe anybody would like to, for fun, make a banner for this little story? I'm not offering out money or anything, but if any of your guys would like to do it for fun I think that would be awesome so see how creative you guys can be with it!**

**REVIEWS get TEASERS!**


	39. Fearless

**Authors Note- I wanted to apologize for not giving out review replies and teasers! I've been super busy working on future chapters for TSoU that I honestly was only able to read them, but I appreciated all your words, I just didn't have time to give out individual reviews for everybody. Copy and pasting the same thing for all of you just doesn't work for me!**

**Disclaimer- S. Meyer owns all things Twilight.**

**Chapter Song- Fearless by: Taylor Swift ( The idea of the song, not the meaning lyric by lyric, hope that makes sense!)**

~\\~

BPOV

~\\~

When I awoke Edward was passed out in the couch across the room. His long legs hung over the couch on one side, and his head was on the other laying on a pillow. The blanket he had was clutched to his chest by his left hand and he was snuggled into it with a free arm hanging down; almost touching the floor.

Fucking adorable, honestly.

As I attempted to sit up, I tried not to groan at the pain that I could feel pulsing through my entire body. It wasn't as unbearable as it had been before, but it was enough to make me wince and lay back to stay still. When I was just hanging on by the end of the effects of my medicine, that was when I felt like I was swallowed by the pain and could barely breathe.

Waking up after the accident was definitely a moment that was unforgettable, and I'd never forget the look in Edward's eyes the moment he saw me wake up. I could see the fear in his eyes, but also the pure joy. It made all of the pain worth it.

I was surprised that I'd made it out alive, because the moment that the truck hit everything turned black. When the ambulance came I could very vaguely remember the paramedics working around me. Afterwards everything went back to black until it faded into a light grey and everything around me was bright white and I was alone; stuck inside of my head and feeling as if I couldn't feel my body.

I expected to be in intense pain, but all I felt was peaceful and everything around me was fucking calm for once in my life. A part of me didn't want to leave, and the other part knew that my entire heart and soul was with Edward in that moment no matter how many miles, steps or seconds away we were from eac hother. There was nowhere else for it to be. No matter how many fights or angry words between us; I belonged with him.

He belonged to me, too, and I was forever his no matter what the circumstance.

All I could really remember from seeing white was seeing my Grandma Swan, and she looked like the last time I'd actually seen her when I was just a little girl, long grey hair, pale wrinkled skin and faded blue eyes. She'd been crying, and holding my hands and telling me that I had to leave; that I wasn't meant to be here right now but that she'd always watch over me and wait for the right time for me to join her.

I couldn't believe it, it was too unreal. I never believed in all of it, the white light, being reunited with the dead loved ones you once knew. But it was fucking legit.

I was in the same white place for a long time with my grandma, and I talked to her about so much that she'd missed when I'd grown up, and she kept telling me that my dad was misunderstood, so terribly misunderstood right now. And I didn't understand what she meant, but there was something in her voice that told me things weren't as I'd always thought them to be, that I was wrongly informed about what I grew up to know.

She talked about Edward, and that she knew someday I'd have a beautiful family and we'd be happier than I'd ever thought I could be. More than I had ever dreamed to be.

I believed her, but that was until I woke up and Edward told me how bad one of injuries truly was.

We'd never talked about a family, but here and there we'd talk about getting married and make small quips about our future together. It was never in a serious nor joking tone, but it was natural instead. Every once in awhile Edward would say that once we're married he'd spoil me endlessly and I couldn't say anything about it, or that we'd have this in our house, or that in our future house.

It was basically things that we knew would happen...But a twist in our story would go against all of the plans I'd had for our future.

Hearing the words choke out of his throat, as if they were painful to utter, hurt me in places I didn't even know existed inside of me.

I had just about a hundred percent chance of never being able to give the person I love most children. And while I'd always teased I'd never have children because they'd be a disaster, once I met Edward...Once I fell in love with Edward and realized that he was the one I wanted to spend the rest of my life with; perspective changed.

We'd never discussed children, but I'd wanted them. I figured it was some kind of unspoken understanding that someday we'd create a perfect little person who would be the most beautiful mix of both of us. He or she would have their father's hair, and my brown eyes. We'd probably want to pull our hair out when we realized how much like us our child truly was, which would be a disaster, but we wouldn't have it any other way.

But I wasn't going to be able to have that.

And I'd admit, days afterwards all I could think about was that Edward was going to leave me because of it. But he was still at my side or across the room in his day clothes passed out on a couch.

Even though I loved him, and he was enough to be able to make me happy; I still felt that pain deep in my gut from knowing I couldn't have a baby with him. It was devastating. More so than I let on to him.

Most recently the dreams of him leave me were dissipating, and I knew that it was due to the fact that he was leaving notes when I awoke or waking me up to kiss me goodbye and telling me he'd return in a few hours. But I was never alone here for more than an hour. Angela would pop in, or Esme, Alice and even Emmett. Yesterday I saw Jess, and she was doing well.

But she looked so guilty, and she was torn up over everything that was done to me. I never blamed her for one moment, because it wasn't her fault. It was her right to turn the fucking car, and that goddamn truck had a fucking red light. He did this to me.

Not Jess.

I know that I could have been bitter over it; I could have pushed everybody away and told Edward that I wasn't worth anything anymore because of my losses. I could have said I wasn't worth sticking around to say if I was going to run right again like a broken car; but I didn't.

The people who loved me were the only ones right now who were keeping me smiling, giving me hope that I would be able to survive all of this and I'd be normal again. And it would be a long fucking process but I knew with the help around me that I'd get through it someway and somehow. I'd talked to James yesterday, and he said when he was off work he'd come out here to see me; but he had a fucking heart attack when Edward told him what happened.

I am still just a little worried about school and how things were going to go once fall came around or if I'd ever be able to take a morning run around campus; but Edward was reassuring me not to worry about these things. That we'd find a way to figure it out somehow, but they were lurching around my mind and were unable to fade away.

We hadn't talked much about everything that happened, as in the reason I left in the first place, and at this point it was pushed to the backburner. All of that seemed so irrelevant compared to all of this. I touched my dislocated shoulder and now I was barely feeling any pain in it, which was nice for once. My abdomen and leg were always constantly hurting from all of the healing that they were doing, the only relief I got from my leg was when I was asleep; and that was rare also with the nurses coming in to give me medicine every three hours. They were giving me smaller doses so they were more frequent for now until they were going to slow it down a little as time went on.

All I wanted though was to be home, but the doctors said that they wanted to wait a little while longer until they were confident I could endure the pain if I was not being woken up every three hours, because obviously nobody at the Cullen's could do that. And I wouldn't ask them to fucking do that, it would be too much.

" What are you thinking so hard about, Angel?"

It'd been so long since I'd heard him call me that, and I smiled at him as he stretched on the couch before standing up, stepping over to me as he kissed me softly. He was being so incredibly careful with me that it was almost annoying. I wasn't made out of porcelain, but he was treating me like it. I'd admit that I wasn't looking good at all. I'd went from being one hundred and fifteen pounds to eighty eight, the doctors were making me fancy protein shakes and Esme was packing her foods with easy to eat things that were easy to digest, but also packed with proteins and vitamins to get my strength back up.

The bones in my back were evident, and my shoulders were more sharp and prominent. My collarbone was just fucking…terrifying to look at and my arms were skinnier than ever, but Edward didn't look at me like I was a skeleton. I didn't feel unhealthy, I was only in pain. But after losing so much blood and all the surgery and medicine, it was taking its toll. They had to switch one pain medication because for some reason it was making me lose more weight.

" I was thinking about getting out of here." I said honestly, breaking out of my thoughts.

" I know you hate being here, but it's only a little while longer. I'd rather keep you here longer so I don't break you when we get home."

" I'm not a china doll."

He shook his head, " No, but you were hit by a car and I have a right to worry about you. I fucking love you, and I'll do anything to keep you safe."

" I fucking love you, too."

" Don't mock me." he laughed, kissing the tip of my nose, " I'm going to take a shower at home, get some coffee and maybe stop by the bakery. I'll talk to the nurse and see if I'll be able to bring anything back for you okay?" he asked, kissing me again before continuing " We need to put some fat on those bones." …And finishing with a chuckle.

" Feel free not to ask, but to buy." I said, tired of eating all of the fucking applesauce and rice and small food. I guess that's what happens when you fuck up your abdominal organs.

" I'll figure it out and be back in like a an hour. Do you need anything before I go?"

" No, I'm alright. Don't rush."

He leaned forward and brushed his lips against mine, lightly applying pressure before tilting his head and taking it a step further, resting his hand on the nape of my neck. When he pulled away he leaned his head against mine and flicked my lip ring with his tongue.

" Maybe rush just a little." I whispered to him.

After he left I was then joined by a nurse ten minutes later, specifically a male nurse who let his eyes wander over me just a little bit. I was no good to look at now, but I just glared at him with distaste and ignored him until he left. Alice had brought me more nighties to wear, and they were comfortable and not as long as a usual nightgown, so it was easier for doctors to adjust and look over me if need be.

But this guy was a little overly friendly.

He asked me about my pain, how I was feeling and if I was eating at all. And then he was trying to move my broken leg, and it honestly fucking hurt because of the joint damage but I bit my lip and endured it because there was nothing I could do about it.

Afterwards he was touching my other leg in a weird way, asking how it felt and if I felt any pain. Nothing on my chart said there was anything wrong with my left leg, creeper.

Needless to say, once he was out of here I was fucking relieved. As I had been lying in bed looking through my phone as I relaxed, two excited people bounded into my room with huge smiles on their faces enough to brighten up the dim room.

Alice hopped up to my bed and kissed my cheek, and Emmett lifted up a fucking _HUGE _teddy bear up onto the bed and rested it on my legs. It wasn't heavy enough to hurt me, but it was big enough to be the size of a human being.

" I figured you needed company for when nobody is here with you, not that it's often, but we all need a friend!" Emmett exclaimed as Alice laughed, setting a bag at the edge of my bed that made me curious as to what the contents were.

" We were going to bring you breakfast but Edward said he had it covered. I did bring a few other things though!"

" They aren't as cool as the bear, just sayin'." Emmett said, sitting in the chair next to my bed.

Alice set out more cotton nighties in all different colors, as well as a few pairs of shorts and loose fitted tank tops along with bandeau type bra's. They had light underwire for some kind of support, but they didn't have clasps and all that fucking jazz.

" Figured these would be easy for you because they don't have a clasp and the underwire is like rubbery something. Edward told me that you were feeling weird without bra's." Alice said with a laugh.

Emmett started to laugh, " Is poor Bella sagging like an old lady?"

" Shut up. If you have boobs you'd understand."

" Well, not Alice of course."

She huffed at Emmett, glaring at him, " Rather something than nothing."

" Trust me Alice, you aren't missing anything good anyways." I grumbled, trying to sit up slowly.

I pressed my hand into the teddy bear and felt it's soft fur, and I wished I could lean over and lay on it but it would hurt like a bitch, so I settled for touching the large paw, that looked as big as Emmett's hand to be honest.

" Why are we talking about boobs, not that I don't like them, that is?" a voice said suddenly.

Edward came into the room, and I was surprised because he said an hour and it'd just been over a half hour. Then again Forks is small and you could get anywhere in ten minutes or less around here. His eyes widened when he looked at the teddy bear Emmett brought, and I saw he was holding a cup of coffee and a bag in his hand.

" What the hell?"

" Don't hate the teddy bear, Edward." Emmett said, offering no explanation as to why he bought it.

He shrugged and grabbed the bag, and all I could smell was cinnamon and it was delicious. He took out a bowl of something, and it was a vaguely familiar bowl that I'd seen at the Cullen's. Also a bottle of water he had brought with him.

" No pastries but my mom made some homemade cinnamon and vanilla oatmeal and it's delicious. And the nurses said no coffee for right now so it's just water; sorry, baby."

" That's alright, and thank you. It's smells amazing."

Edward pulled up a chair next to me and held the bowl with a spoon, looking down at the things Alice bought me.

" I think she has enough of these for a new one every day of the year, Alice."

She smiled, " That's the point. See, since Bella is in the hospital we can spoil her and she can't do anything but accept it."

The bowl of food was set in my lap and he gave me the spoon, allowing me to use my left arm to eat even though it was awkward as hell. The moment the flavors of the food hit my tongue, I wanted to moan. It was honestly the best thing I've been able to eat since I'd been here.

After inhaling my breakfast, Alice helped me wash my hair, which was always a fun event since I was basically bed ridden, and I couldn't wait until I could stand in a hot shower and get fully clean. Once it was nice and clean she went all out to blow-dry and straighten my hair before Jasper had come to the hospital to pick her up. And soon Emmett was off to go spend time with Rosalie and it was Edward and I.

He leaned close to me, twisting a strand of my hair around his finger before leaning forward to smell me.

" Even in a hospital you manage to smell good."

" Don't even lie."

Edward rolled his eyes and leaned forward to kiss me quickly before pulling away and taking a long drink from his water.

" So, do you think we should talk more about everything that happened before all this?" I asked him.

He leaned back in his chair and sighed, resting his hands on his leg, " Yeah, maybe we should."

" Jessica's brother Brandon kissed me." I blurted out before I could think about it.

" What?" he shouted.

" Calm down...I was in their backyard having a smoke and he came outside. He was asking me questions but I went inside, and he went in front of me and kissed me. I swear it barely lasted a second and I basically told him to fuck off."

His fingers ran through his hair and he leaned forward, trying to control his anger that I knew was brewing inside of him, but I had to tell him. If I kept secrets from him it would only make me feel sick about that, and I loved him too much to keep something like that from him.

" Thank you for telling me, but I swear to god the next person that kisses you...Fuck, what is with guys thinking they can kiss my girl?"

" Don't even ask me."

I reached my left arm out and touched his knee, running my finger over his jean clad leg.

" I don't think I'll be able to tell you enough how sorry I am for not being honest with you about everything. You know, when we first started going out and we spent such an amazing summer together, I guess a part of me thought that down the line I'd tell you but it seemed to early. I went off to college, and then we had a falling out and once we were back together again I just thought it was a great opportunity to start over, a part of me just forgot about it all. Things were new and great and fucking _good_ for me."

It made sense to me, and while I wished that he would have told me, it wouldn't change what happened.

All Edward wanted was to start over, to move on with me. He wasn't trying to lie to me and make things look malicious and purposely not truthful. For a moment I was quiet, trying to let things sink in and register.

Life was too short, everybody said that, and I didn't realize that until I woke up laying in a hospital bed thinking that I was dying. I could have lost Edward, and even worse; I could have died while we were still in this fight or misunderstanding and that alone made me realize how short it was.

I threaded my fingers through his and brought them up to rest on my lap.

" I was really angry at you...No, not angry, but I felt lied to and stupid for not knowing all of this. But if there is anything that I've learned through it is that...Life is too fucking short and if something worse would have happened to me and we never resolved things; I don't want to imagine how tragic it would be. I'm sorry for leaving when I should have stayed. Running isn't the answer, not for us."

He brought his hands up to my face, wiping away my tears from my face.

" You talked to me when I wasn't awake, and you thought I didn't hear a word you said and I did, not all of it but I did. I thought I'd never be able to say anything back to you. I wanted to tell you it wasn't your fault, that you aren't the reason I am in here and how much I love you. But I'm here, you didn't lose me and I didn't lose you and everything is going to be okay in some way. I refuse to spend another moment giving a fuck about what happened in your past because it's over and done with now."

" I love you, too, Isabella Swan. I don't think you have any idea how much I love you."

I pressed my lips against his, " If you love me then please find a way to get me home."

Edward chuckled, " Soon, love, I promise. You have to start moving around more."

" I go to the bathroom."

" In almost excruciating pain when you move. You know what the doctors have been saying."

Just then a knock on the door sounded, and I saw one of my other doctors, Dr. Baker, step into the room. He was a middle aged man with light brown hair and fair skin. When Dr. Gerandy wasn't here he usually came to check on me. He was very nice, and not overly trying to move my limbs.

" Good Afternoon, Bella. How are you feeling today?"

" I'm okay." I replied, smiling at Edward as he kissed the top of my hand.

Dr. Baker clipped up my x-rays, which I imagined were the ones he took just yesterday, and put them against the bright light box, turning it on to reveal the pictures they had taken of my pelvis. And fuck there were a lot of small cracks everywhere and looking at it scared me; I hoped all of that was going to fuse together and be one again.

" These are the x-rays yesterday of your pelvis, and it has recovered very quickly from where it was the first day you were in here. The bones are pulling together and healing very well."

" When will I be able to walk again?" I asked him timidly.

He sat down in a chair, looking over more papers and glancing down at the paperwork he had in his hands. Before looking up me he pushed up his wire rimmed glasses and set the files on his lap.

" Now, I won't lie, Bella. But I feel I need to be blunt. The good news is that soon I think you'll be able to go home. The x-rays of your ribs we took were very well, your shoulder is healing and your arm is slowly following afterwards. However the fractured hip joint and the severe break of your femur is what is going to hold you back the most. Although your pelvis will take four to six months of physical therapy and about the same amount of time alone for you to walk again without pain. Your leg however will hopefully heal during this time, but due to the other injuries it will hold back the physical therapy we can do with you. Your hip joint will be about three to six months, and the same amount for you femur, three months for the bone to heal, and three to get the muscles back."

And here I was, thinking that I'd be able to fucking go back to school this fall semester...I'd be lucky to be fully healed and back together by Thanksgiving, hell, maybe even Christmas. I held in the tears and Edward squeezed my hand.

" I know this isn't what you want to hear, but you need to know that the next three to six months aren't going to be at all easy for you. You are going to get frustrated and there will be times where you'll want to give up; but we're going to help you along the way Bella."

I nodded, " Thank you for being upfront about it, I needed to know this."

" Of course. But don't forget the good news. Your shoulder is healed up nicely as well as your broken ribs which is very good. In about a week we'll talk about you going home more because you've been doing well. As we've said, we just want to be able to get you on lower doses for right now while you are here, and then we will bring them up when you go home for during the day. We also will have the nurses coming in here daily to help you sit up more and get more mobile so that at home it won't be so hard if you need to get up and use the washroom; though you will need help."

" That's great." Edward said, smiling at me, " We've all been waiting to get her home."

" Well, Dr. Cullen let us know that Isabella is staying with you and your family; so that has the odds in her favor knowing there is a doctor near her during night hours especially."

After discussing a few more details about physical therapy and more about my healing process, the doctor left and Edward looked genuinely happy to hear everything; and I was, too.

But now I really had to worry about school.

" I'm not going to be able to go to school this semester...What in the hell am I going to do Edward?"

He sighed, tugging his fingers through his hair, " I don't know, but we will figure it out, Bella."

" What if I lose my scholarship? Oh, fuck, I didn't even..."

I felt Edward rest his hand on my cheek, and he forced me to look at him, " You won't. We will figure out a way to make this work, Bella, I promise."

" Graduating early was for fucking nothing, Edward. Nothing."

" No, baby, it wasn't. I promise we'll figure this entire issue out."

I took a deep breath and he gripped my hand, " You still need to go to Juilliard, Edward. I won't let you miss anything because of me."

" Taking care of you is much more important. But let's not talk about it right now, okay. You get to probably come home next week so let's focus on the positive things, okay?"

" Yeah," I whispered quietly, " You're right."

He leaned forward and pecked my lips, " I love you, and I promise we'll work everything out."

" I love you, too."

" I hate seeing you so upset."

Reaching over, he grabbed a permanent marker that was in the drawer next to my bed, and it was completely black. He uncapped it and I saw him lean forward to start writing on my leg cast. Right across my entire leg from my thigh to my ankle he wrote in huge letters that he loved me, and I couldn't help but laugh quietly at his antics, and he sighed his name before I saw him drawing two little stick figures holding hands, and then he was attempting to draw a panda bear, and then a real bear that honestly looked like a really fat dog.

I didn't bother to argue him or interrupt his fun, but it was cute to see him trying to draw on my cast to make me not feel as sad, honestly, without him I wouldn't know what the fuck to do with myself. When I smiled at him his eyes looked up at he met mine.

And I knew he was right. Somehow we would find a way to work things out.

Life was never promised to be easy, but it sure as hell was promised to be worth it.

~\\~

EPOV

~\\~

I was completely fucking elated to hear from the nurse that Bella had been able to sleep through the entire night without waking up in pain, and honestly, it was a fucking breakthrough that I'm sure the entire hospital was celebrating. Last night I'd gone home when Bella had fallen asleep, because my mom said that I needed a good night's rest, and Alice was having one of her 'feelings' that everything would be okay if I left.

Begrudgingly, I did, but I left a note for Bella because I always made sure to do that for her. Bella's nurse today, Emily, told me before she left at the end of her midnight to seven thirty shift, that Bella had slept all through the night, and the nurse before said she'd never even moved at all. I knew that when Bella woke up she'd be happy, and as long as this was reoccurring, there would be no reason for Bella not to be able to go home. In all actuality, she could come home, but the doctors wanted her body to be able to at least get through the night without medicine especially because most nights she was waking up crying because of the pain she felt.

When I walked into the room I had the usual bowl of cinnamon and vanilla oatmeal that Bella really loved right now, and Esme was happily getting up to make it for me to take for Bella in the morning. I was just glad she was actually eating something, because she wasn't exactly happy with eating applesauce and soft foods in general. Because of the damage to her abdominal organs, the doctors didn't want her to be eating heavy food because of her digestion. There was no severe damage to her stomach, but to the rest of her organs, they wanted her to take it easy on them for awhile.

When I walked into the room, Bella was still fast asleep, looking just as beautiful as she always does, and looking so peaceful. Her face was smoothed out, no worry lines on her forehead. It was such a long time since I'd seen such a look of such peacefulness on her face. She was slowly gaining her weight back and looking less like a person of the living dead. It scared the fuck out of me when I saw her collarbone or her spine, but I never told her that.

I stepped up towards her bed and leaned forward to kiss her quickly before setting the bowl and my keys on the table next to her bed. The railings were down on the bed now, so I could easily reach over to hold her hand, if only the IV cords weren't in the way as they always were.

She stayed asleep until just before nine, and then she started to wake up and a nurse came in to give Bella her medicine for now. Obviously she had gotten some good sleep because she looked a little more refreshed this morning, and I was so glad to see that.

" Good morning, sweetheart."

" Good morning." she replied, her voice raspy and dry. I stood and went to the small miniature fridge that was in the corner of the room. After grabbing her a small bottle of orange juice I brought it back for her and she emptied half of the contents before setting it down and leaning back.

Reaching forward, I brushed a stray strand of her hair behind her ear, " The nurses said that you slept all night without them needing to come in for a dose of medicine. That's fucking amazing, babe." I said, smiling as I leaned forward to kiss her quickly.

She yawned tiredly and I took a long drink from a bottle of water before leaning back in the chair I knew all too well.

" Edward, I love you."

I smiled, " I know you do."

" You've been absolutely amazing through all of this, and I can't thank you enough for being here all the time...I just love you so much I don't know what I would do without you."

Tears caught in her eyes, and I leaned closer to her, " Well, you'll never be able to find out because I'm right here. And I always will be."

**Authors Note- We're making some good progress. It was honestly really hard for me to channel Bella's POV this chapter, but leave me a review and tell me how I did. Reviews are really what is helping me get all the inspiration and great emotion of the chapters! And my inbox has been a little hungry the past few days, so feel free to feed it!**

**This time I promise to get teasers out. The only reason they didn't go out was because the chapter was still being worked on and I didn't want to give out a teaser only to change a certain part of the chapter. But enough of my babble. If you got through all of this put a smiley face in your review to let me know!**

**REVIEWS get TEASERS**


	40. Stand

**Authors Note- Hello everybody! I hope that you enjoy the chapter!**

**Disclaimer- S. Meyer owns all things Twilight.**

**Chapter Song- Stand by: Rascal Flatts**

~\\~

BPOV

July 30th (2008)

Wednesday

~\\~

I winced and looked away as I saw the IV needle slip out of my skin, and immediately it was covered with gauze with a Hello Kitty band aid over it. Edward smiled at me as he saw it and I glared at him because he thought it was fucking funny. They didn't have anything more basic or plain around here?

The nurse adjusted the arm sling for my casted right arm and I held it against my chest securely. Afterwards the doctor came in with all of my prescriptions and told Edward and I all the rules for them; when to take it, how to take it and how not to take it as well all of the other lectures about it and how to be safe. It was annoying, but it was obvious they had to give this speech because a lot of people took advantage of pain killers. He told me that I'd be coming in for checkups for the next two weeks, and then they wanted to start physical therapy to get my leg more mobile but it would be a short while before that. I wasn't even sure if I would still be here at that time.

Edward was very adamant about listening to everything the doctor said, and most of it was that I had to rest, eat healthy, make sure that I took my medicine as I should and to just take care of myself; and let others help me when I needed it even though I wouldn't want it. Honestly, I knew that I would have to relent and let the Cullen's help; but pushing away the independence and stubborn behavior would be hard.

I listened to them diligently, but honestly; I just wanted to get the hell out of here. They had given me crutches, but I wouldn't really be using them until my arm was completely healed, and it was actually getting pretty close to being all good, now it was just my pelvis and leg I had to focus on.

I had to be wheeled to Edward's car in a wheelchair due to hospital policy, and they had offered to give me a wheelchair to make it easy for others to get me around; but Edward was all for carrying me around these days, but until he started doing it then I knew he'd get sick of it

When we got in the car Edward loaded up my things in the back. As I settled in the car, I put the seat back and winced as I felt the pain in my hip. Honestly, the fucking hip cast was getting fucking annoying. It curved around both of my hips to stay together, and all I was able to really wear was dresses. I could wear shorts, but it was annoying anyways. There were screws in my hip to hold the joint fracture together, and I'd sure hope it would work to fix it so I could get a different cast. Showering was going to be a bitch though, that was all I was focused on.

Luckily my ribs were healed up, but I had a nice scar from where the rib had punctured through that had healed pretty nicely, it was pretty fucking weird looking, and when they put a new cast on my right arm, I could see all the scars on my arm from the glass that had imbedded into my skin. I guess that it was a small price to pay for my life.

The moment we pulled up the driveway at the Cullen's, Esme, Alice and Emmett were all outside waiting with huge smiles. I saw Rosalie sitting in a chair on the deck, looking annoyed at everything, but I didn't really give a shit about here. I didn't ask for the attention, I just received it anyways.

" Oh, Bella. We're so happy to have you back here! Welcome home sweetheart!"

It was just about the first time I heard her say that to me, calling this my home too. Edward squeezed my hand before putting his window up and getting out of the car. Esme opened the car door for me as Edward came up behind her, the smile on her face even wider.

I smiled, " Thank you, Esme for everything. I appreciate it so much."

" Your room is all set up, and we even put a small mini fridge in there for you whenever you need a drink or a quick snack. I also made sure to set up fresh sheets and-"

" Esme thank you for all of this, but it's not necessary."

" Of course it is!" she argued as Edward came to the side of the car to help me out. He very carefully lifted me up into his arms, trying not to bend me too much as he carried me into the house and up the stairs.

The moment I was sitting on the guest bedroom bed, I let out a long sigh of relief.

" You have no idea how amazing this bed feels."

" Trust me, baby, I do. I've been sleeping on a hard couch most nights." he said, smiling at me.

I frowned, but he leaned forward to give me a long, lingering kiss.

Edward helped me settle in on the bed, and he put my casted leg on a pillow, and two others behind my back. Honestly, I just wanted to take a long fucking nap and I missed sleeping next to Edward. I only hoped maybe he would join me and not be scared of sleeping with me because of all this extra shit wrapped around me.

" What are you thinking about, Bella?"

" Will you sleep next to me tonight?"

He had a very wary expression on his face, and I hated seeing the uncertainty, " I don't know, love..."

" You can sleep on my left side, the somewhat good side, please. I miss you. Fuck, I miss you."

The look in his eyes told me that he missed me just as much, and just like that he got onto the bed carefully and laid next to me, close enough for me to be able to turn my head to rest it on his shoulder while he gently wormed his arm underneath me to wrap around my waist loosely.

" We'll start with a nap." he murmured, kissing my temple softly before resting his mouth near my ear and kissing the shell of it before nipping my earlobe.

I smiled and turned my head to kiss the side of his neck softly. He smelled like cinnamon and spices mixed with something sweet that made my head spin. It was his perfect scent, and it was almost like a drug to me; I couldn't get enough.

" I can't nap when you are doing that." he hummed.

" And I can't nap while you're doing this." I said, leaning up to nip at his ear before resting my head on his shoulder.

He kissed the top of my head and pulled the strap down on my tanktop before moving around to kiss the exposed skin. It was driving me insane, and there was absolutely nothing that I could do about it.

" Don't start something you know we can't finish."

After nestling his head into my hair he rested his free hand on my stomach gently, and in that moment I knew that our moods had immediately dampened and we were once again filled with sadness. I clamped my eyes shut tightly and tried to hold in the tears. I didn't want to fucking cry, I was tired of always crying.

No matter how many days, weeks or months would go by I'd still never be able to completely heal emotionally from knowing that I probably couldn't ever have children. The devastation wouldn't ever lessen, and there would always be that lingering 'what if' or 'what could have been' in our heads.

The insecurities I felt over it I hope would fade. I knew that Edward loved me, but when I heard how heartbroken he was when he told me we'd probably never be able to have children, it made me wonder what would happen if we married and just being husband and wife wasn't enough for him. What if he wanted us to be mom and dad? I tried to stray these thoughts from my mind, but they still fell through the cracks. Of course we had the option to adopt in the future if it came to that; but the thought didn't appeal to me; it was either it would be a product of Edward and I or nothing. It sounded harsh really to anybody who would hear it, and I always thought it was amazing for the people who were able to adopt…but I guess that it just wasn't in the cards for me.

" I love you, my sweet girl. Don't cry, it breaks my heart to see you crying."

I wanted to turn in his arms and have him hold me, but that position wasn't exactly ideal for right now so I settled for resting my head on his shoulder as his cheek rested on top of my head. His hand reached over to grab the white blanket at the end of the bed and he sat up to get his shoes off, as well as take off my one flip flop.

He curled his arm around me and I closed my eyes, hoping for sleep to whisk me away into a world where I couldn't remember what was happening in reality.

~\\~

" Oh, fuck...Yes, fuck yeah, Edward; right fucking there." I groaned loudly, leaning to the side to let him continue.

God, my ankle was so fucking itchy and Edward finally hit the right spot to relieve it. He laughed at me and leaned over to grab his bottle of water next to the bed, just then Emmett strolled into the room with a curious expression on his face.

" Hey, Bella? Why do you have to "put your two cents in"...but it's only a "penny for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to?" Emmett asked.

I gave him a bored expression, " That isn't even a joke, Emmett." I informed him.

He gave me a 'duh' expression, " Yeah, I know; I'm honestly just curious."

" Well, I'm not sure Emmett."

At my tone, he rolled his eyes and hopped up on the bed and Edward scooted over closer to me as Emmett took up space, looking up at the television to see what we were watching.

" What is Dexter?"

" An amazingly awesome show that Edward and I discovered about a trained psychopath.

He gave both of us a look, " You guys probably just make out during the entire show, am I right?"

" No, Emmett."

For just a short while Emmett just his mouth and watched the show on television. And it really was a good show, and I did happen to pay attention to it mostly because Edward and I weren't getting physical...At all. The most I was getting out of him these days was a peck on the lips and it was frustrating.

I wanted nothing more than to be able to be where we had been the beginning of the summer, but Edward and I weren't even going to be able to even think about having sex until my pelvis was healed, and everything was back in its working order.

At least, everything besides my ability to reproduce.

There were days that I let everything get me down and there was nothing I wanted more than to wallow and cry. Hell, I'd even called my mother when Edward had gone out and sat on the phone crying for a half hour until she calmed me down. Edward had also walked in the room during it, and how he was sticking around a lot to make sure I wasn't alone was amazing. Half the time he didn't know what to do but try to hold me, but it was something.

Even though it got a little annoying never being alone ever, I thought of it seemingly positive because it didn't make me think as much as when I'm alone. And thinking wasn't always turning out to be positive; with Edward I was keeping a smile on my face and he was always here for a hug or someone to curl up next to or nap on.

" This is actually pretty good. Mind if I stick around?" Emmett asked, crossing his ankles as he got comfortable on the bed.

Edward was two seconds from telling Emmett to fuck off but I rested my hand on his chest and gave him a gentle look before he settled next to me and I put my head on his shoulder.

" I'm not bothering your special time, right?"

I smiled as Edward rolled his eyes at Emmett, " Special time?"

" Ya know, getting your groove on?"

" I hardly think Edward and I can get our 'groove' on with the condition I am in right now."

Emmett shrugged, " Figured I'd ask anyways."

" Where's Rose?" Edward asked, trying to sound casual.

" With Tanya or some shit, apparently it's a girls night and I'm not allowed."

" That's cool."

A sigh escaped Emmett, " Not really. Rosie acts like a bitch when she's around Tanya."

Edward raised an eyebrow at Emmett.

" Yeah, I get it; she acts like a bitch to you guys, too. But honestly, she really isn't like that normally. Atleast, not around me."

Edward gave him another disbelieving look before looking at me. I shrugged the best I could and he kissed my forehead.

Yeah, he didn't buy that bullshit for one second.

~\\~

" I want to."

" I don't think it's a good idea."

" Edward, I haven't done it in what feels like forever. Please just help me out."

" Bella..."

" Fuck, please...Just do this for me."

He glared at me as he started to wrap my leg up, and I held onto his shoulder as I tried to balance.

" Not that I don't appreciate the lack of clothes in this situation, but this is slightly weird." he groaned, covering the cast securely in the saran wrap before moving onto my arm next.

It was true, how could he even attempt deny me what I wanted when I was already completely prepared, clothes off and everything? The answer was; he really couldn't, nothing would get in my way, especially not him.

I was determined to shower.

Edward had a stool in the shower ready even though he completely didn't think this was a good idea at all. He helped me get situated in the shower and stood by the glass door, staring at me.

" Okay now, figure it out." he challenged.

With my free left arm, I was able to reach forward and tug his jeans down.

" Get your sexy ass in here and help me out." I said with a smile.

Almost immediately he stripped out of his clothes and got into the shower, putting the water on warm before starting to help me clean up. Honestly, I felt so much cleaner than I had in days. He thoroughly enjoyed washing my hair and the rest of me very carefully. These days he didn't treat me or hold me any less than a china doll, sometimes it was annoying but other times it was sweet.

But I couldn't hate him for it because, fuck, he was even nice enough to help me shave. I loved this man.

I got him back by washing his hair for him, and the rest of him the best I could with my left hand as I sat on a stool. Once we had finished with the long task in the shower, Edward quickly hopped out and wrapped a towel around his waist before carefully helping me up and walking me to the edge of the bathtub before helping me wrap up in a towel.

Edward dried me off first and then took off all of the plastic wrap, and everything work and nothing that wasn't supposed to be wet didn't. Afterwards he helped me into my necessary undergarments and then I slipped on a night over it. Edward dressed quickly in a pair of boxers and a pair of sleep pants.

He helped me comb out my hair, and even went as far as to attempt to blow-dry it without frying it off my head. Edward actually did a decent job with it; I was pleasantly surprised. Afterwards he put it a ponytail for me, because it wasn't exactly easy to do it with one hand and the task was finished. I couldn't believe how patient Edward had been with me through it all, but I was fucking grateful for it all.

It had been just a few days since I'd been back at the Cullen's, and while things were a struggle, Edward was absolutely amazing. He never complained or acted like he didn't want to help at all.

Angela had come to see me for a bit, and Jess even stopped by and we talked for awhile. The car had been completely smashed and the guy driving the truck was paying for her to get a new one, as he should be.

Esme was spoiling me to my fucking core, and honestly it was too much, but she wasn't relenting. Her and Alice had gone out and bought more of the VS nighties I had, boxer shorts and loose fitted tank tops. On top of all the meals Esme was cooking me, every single course during the day including snacks in between all of that. Nothing was half done and everything was completely fresh and homemade.

For the sake of not arguing, I just shut my mouth or said thank you. Edward got a kick out of it.

" I'm going to get a smoke, I'll be back."

I glared at him, " I hate you. If I have to stop so should you. And you don't have to stay in here with me all day, you know. It's boring."

" Shut it. I'll be back in a bit." he said, leaning forward to kiss my forehead before stepping out of the room.

When he left the room I let out a deep breath and laid back.

Lately I'd been feeling a little bit smothered by all of the Cullen's, and Edward. I loved them so much, especially Edward, but sometimes I felt like I needed a little bit of space from it. Of course I appreciated Esme's cooking, Alice and her little activities she'd burst into the room with randomly. I couldn't forget Emmett and his pointless jokes he'd use to try and make me laugh.

He's still attempting. But it's only been just a few days of awful jokes, hopefully one good one would spark so I could get him off my back, or away from my door. It didn't help that I couldn't smoke because I was constantly stopping myself from snapping at Edward when he tried to help me. I knew I needed the help, but I was used to my fucking independence.

I missed it.

When I lived with my dad, I was mostly alone; I did everything for myself. When I went off to college I had to take care of myself, there was nobody else to do it especially when Edward wasn't around the first few months I was in New York. I was used to it, even though Edward enjoyed spoiling me and taking care of me; I didn't always enjoy it, but I did it because of how happy it made him to do it. Giving in was always the best option with him. Either that or fight with him, and that was the last thing I wanted.

The meds were kicking in and I could feel myself become weary and tired. Frequently I napped during the day, and then I'd sleep all night, but it was normal apparently. When I was asleep I couldn't feel the pain, so that sounded good to me. My leg was constantly hurting, and my arm was a little better. The pain in my pelvis I was getting used to, but shattered bones fucking suck. They were healing, but the doctor's said I'm young enough to have a good chance of bouncing back quicker that someone older.

My eyes closed shut and I adjusted myself to lay down more before snuggling into the pillow I had next to me. The blanket I had was pulled up to my waist, so I pulled it up more and sighed; darkness enveloping me and drifting me off into a painless world.

Later on I was woken up by Edward who was trying to carefully redress a cut that I had on my upper left arm. I looked over at him as he concentrated deeply before securing the gauze with medical tape. When he noticed I was awake he leaned over to kiss my temple.

" Have a good sleep?"

" What time is it? Fuck, it's already dark out."

" A little after eleven."

The room was mostly dark, and I noticed that I wasn't even in the guest room anymore, but in Edward's room. It felt like forever since I'd been in here, but everything looked exactly the same as it had been before the accident.

" Esme wanted to clean the sheets so I carried you in here. Is that alright?"

" Yeah."

He tossed out the older dressings and went into the bathroom quickly before returning and laying down on the bed next to me on my left. Edward brushed my bangs out of my face before leaning over to rest his head in the crook of my neck, his arm carefully draped over my waist.

" Are you alright?" I asked him, surprised by his sudden movement.

" I love you so much."

I used my left hand to reach up and rest my hand on his back, rubbing up and down slowly. He kissed my neck softly and I tugged at the small strands of hair at the nape of his neck. His hair was really getting long, and I knew he hadn't cut it since the beginning of summer. I was pretty sure he was getting sick of it because he was walking around with a beanie covering it most of the day.

" I love you, too."

" I have no idea what I would have done if I lost you." He ran his hand over my cheek, looking straight at me. I leaned into his touch and closed my eyes, lifting my left hand to touch his arm.

When I opened my eyes to look at him, he was still gazing, " You'll never have to know."

For awhile it was quiet between us. These days, being together was enough, and I knew that Edward was at times having moments where he wanted to just be with me. It was hard for me to thinking about not being here anymore, not being able to be with him at all sounded fucking painful

After laying around, a topic came to mind that I knew we'd have to discuss eventually. I didn't want to worry about it, but this was something we were going to have to discuss sooner or later.

" So what're we going to do about college for me?" I asked him.

I expected him to go into this whole 'we'll work it out spiel' because to be perfectly honest, that's exactly what he had been feeding me whenever I said a word about college; but with the school year starting within a month I knew that it was going to be something we needed to work out now.

It couldn't be put on the backburner forever, and especially because of all the hard work I did to graduate early; I didn't want to lose all of that and say to hell with it.

" I was talking to my mom, and she had a really good suggestion."

" What is that?"

He traced a circle around on my stomach, " We were looking online and found out that NYU offers online courses to take and we thought that you could do that for the semester, or until you are up and running again. The doctors said it would probably be until November until you are one hundred percent, so in January you could probably enroll to go back to the actual classes and switch back."

I'd never even considered doing online courses, and fuck, I didn't even know that NYU offered that kind of opportunity for students. It was an amazing idea, and immediately I knew that it was what I wanted to do. When I talked to Esme two weeks ago she said that I could stay in Forks and she could take care of me and take me to appointments, physical therapy and etc.

And while I was thankful for her offer; I didn't want to be away from Edward, and when he broached the topic of skipping his first semester I wasn't going to let him do that. No matter how much I wanted him to be here with me, I couldn't ever ask him to sacrifice for much. I also wanted to get an education; I didn't want to sit on my ass all semester. That was second on what mattered most to me right now. Edward being the first.

" I never thought of that...But what about doctor's appointments? I can't drive."

" We can adjust them around my classes and vice versa, and by the time school starts you'll be able to get up without help so during the day you'll be alright, and since I'm getting an apartment this year you can stay with me, and when the semester is over you'll be in your second year so we can stay together."

" Sure you want to live with me? I might ruin your college experience."

" Fuck that. I don't care about partying and all that shit. I just want you. Forever. Always mine. No matter what."

" You said 'fuck'!"

He chuckled, " I did."

" You seem to have been on a polite kick these days."

" Fuck, shit, damn, fuck, fuck, fuck." he taunted, leaning up to kiss me softly on the lips as he let out a slew of curses.

His hand slid into my hair and he deepened the kiss, leaning more against my left side. I missed the intimacy we had, and I knew it would be awhile before we could do anything; but these small moments were enough.

Edward slowed down our kiss before pulling away from me.

" So is that what you want to do? Take online classes and stay with me in New York? We can find you a doctor in the area and work everything out with physical therapy. I'm sure Carlisle can fax over all of the hospital information to one in New York."

" I don't want to be away from you." I murmured, " It's like my own version of hell."

He smiled and leaned forward, kissing the corner of my mouth before letting his face hover closely to mine.

" We'll be together, Bella. No matter what it takes."

The determination in his voice settled the anxiety in my stomach and I carefully adjusted my body to lay next to him. With my right leg elevated on a pillow it was difficult but Edward always found a way to wrap himself around me in a way that wasn't painful.

" I love you. You're the reason I can endure all of this."

I felt his lips on my neck for just a moment before he rested his hand near my neck, playing with the ends of my hair with the crook of his elbow near my stomach. And we laid like that even after the moment we fell into a deep sleep.

~\\~

EPOV

~\\~

.Fuck.

As I saw Chief Swan enter his police cruiser from its spot parked on the long driveway of my home, I found the urge to run up to him and ask him what the hell he was even thinking being here. Before I could say anything he'd only given me a look before getting in and starting his car. He rounded the driveway before turning his car around and heading down the driveway; his eyes meeting mine in a fiery gaze before he was past me and disappearing from my sight.

I turned my car off quickly, grabbing the bags of groceries I'd picked up for my mom before heading up the driveway a little bit quicker than I usually would.

Just an hour and a half ago my mom asked me to run some errands for her because she was doing chores around the house and was too busy at the moment. I'd offered to do it for her and Bella had been peacefully asleep since it was still early in the morning.

She was sleeping so well now, and I always made an effort not to bother her in the mornings. I insisted on her sleeping in the guest room so I wouldn't bug her, but she wanted me right next to her; and that's where I wanted to be, but she was so fragile to me right now.

Seeing Charles Swan in the driveway of my home left me with a bad feeling in my gut, and I only hoped that he'd not even been let in the house, but my mom was too kind. She always gave someone a chance or the benefit of the doubt without fail. When I got up the stairs to the house I walked in and walked swiftly into the kitchen, finding it completely and totally empty. Without even a second thought I'd set the bags down on the counters and jogged up the stairs to the guest bedroom.

When I creaked open the door I saw Bella sitting up in bed wiping tears from her face, and my mom was holding her hand carefully, rubbing it softly. The moment Bella laid eyes on me she teared up and my mom stood.

" You both should talk, okay?"

" What's going on? Why was your father here, Bella?"

My mom left the room, giving me a soft look before shutting the door behind her. I went to Bella's side and she blinked back more tears. It broke my heart to see her like that, and if it was because of her father, as I assumed it was; there would be fucking hell to pay. I didn't fucking care if he was a cop.

" Bella, what happened, baby?"

" There was so much I didn't know...So much they kept from me, Edward." Bella cried, her small body wracking with sobs I knew were probably hurting her; not only emotionally but physically.

I wrapped my arms around her and stared deep into her wide, glossy doe eyes. She looked devastated and so confused right now that I could barely even process it. I didn't exactly understand what she was referring to though. I needed more.

" E-Edward...Charlie Swan might not even be my father."

**Authors Note- I always told you we'd get to Charlie, and I just thought Chapter 40 would be a winner! So this may be a stretch, and I am not sure how many of you guys are lurching in the corners, but maybe we can reach 600 reviews in celebration? It would be awesome to hear everybody's thoughts, suggestions and hell, even some theories if you've got any! All reviews will be replied to within two days of receiving them as well if I get plenty of those wonderful thoughts from you guys so please hop to it! This has been a long time coming and I have been dying to finally get this written up and get thoughts on it!**

**REVIEWS get EXTRA LONG TEASERS and EARLY replies!**

**Love you guys, hope you have an awesome weekend!**


	41. Let It Be

**Authors Note- This chapter is a little fillerish because I'm crossing over from them being in Forks to going back to New York very, very soon. I hope you all got your teasers quickly! I sent them really quickly to you guys, anybody who didn't get it either reviewed in as a guest or had the disabled. If you reviewed yesterday I didn't bother only because I was posting today, and you probably would have gotten it right before I posted, so I didn't see the point.**

**Enough of my blathering though, READ ON!**

**Disclaimer-S. Meyer owns all things Twilight.**

**Chapter Song- Let It Be by: The Beatles**

~\\~

EPOV

~\\~

I was sure I had an expression on my face that said ' what the fuck', but I had absolutely no idea how to respond to what I just heard from her mouth. Esme sat next to her as a soothing presence, and I fucking stood there not a clue on how to decipher this probably looking like a blank faced idiot.

" What?"

" You heard me, Edward." Bella said, her tone starting to sound angry and biting.

Pissing her off was the last thing that I needed to do right now. I ran my fingers through my hair, tugging at it roughly before looking over at my mom.

" Can we have a moment alone?" I requested.

She stood in understanding and left the room, telling us that if we needed anything to just ask. Once the door was shut behind her I sat down at the end of the bed. Bella wiped the tear tracks on her face that dripped off her chin. Her fingers fiddled with the corner of the blanket that laid on top of her, pulling at a stray string that was getting longer by the second.

" Tell me what is going on."

" Charlie just showed up here and Esme didn't want to just shut him out...He told me that he thought it was time for me to know the truth behind their divorce. It was out of the blue, we haven't fucking talked at all. Not even when I woke up after my accident."

I was well aware of that fact, not only because Bella told me, but because of the fact that I rarely even left her side after the accident. Especially the first few weeks, I was there every day, all day and there was no getting rid of me. I also knew that if he was there, it would be clear on her face without her even mentioning a word of it.

But why the fuck did he feel the need to tell her all of this now after so many years? Why was now the right time. I didn't want to know what kind of fucked up shit that pathetic excuse for a father came up with in his head. I could feel my blood boiling as the anger rised inside of me. I forced myself to get a grip on it before I found myself in the car speeding down the roads of Forks, Washington.

" What the fuck?"

Bella wiped a stray tear before it dripped down, leaning forward slightly to put her head in her hands. Not only did my girl look sad, but she looked devastated as fuck. It was like she didn't know what was going on just as much as I didn't. I pulled her hands from her face and looked at her tear-filled eyes.

" Tell me what he told you."

" Around the time my mom found out she was pregnant with me, she'd been fooling around with another guy." Bella started, choking on her words, " They weren't married yet, but when my mom found out apparently she was fucking a friend of my dad's in high school. The entire pregnancy she was clueless of who my father was. And she didn't even say anything to Charlie about it until after they'd been married and I was born."

I looked at Bella, and I conjured an image of Charlie in my mind also. Honestly, Bella always banked on the fact that her father hated her because she looked like Renee and it reminded him of their failed marriage. I didn't agree with the way Charlie treated her; but of course if I had a kid from a previous marriage, and I loved the woman, it would bother me if she looked like her. It would be a reminder, so to some very small extent I could understand it.

None of Bella's features really resembled Charlie Swan, except for the fact that Bella has darker hair and her mother's has a very light brown, almost blonde, hair color. They had the same dark brown eyes and facial features although Renee didn't have as many sharp lines as Bella did; such as her nose, her small jaw and her cheekbones. It was easy to see the similarity between Renee and Bella, but Charlie and Bella not so much. But it wasn't like anybody would question the fact that Bella belonged to him or not. I mean, fuck, Alice barely looks like Carlisle at all if it weren't for the eyes but she was his.

I tried to wrap my mind around it, and at the same time, I couldn't really see Bella's mom as a cheater. Renee seems like such a loyal, sweet woman and so incredibly nice at least when I met her. But I didn't know her like Bella did, or her dad did; so that left a lot of blanks. She could be selling herself on the streets for all I fucking know.

" His friend's name was Blake Moretti...Captain of the baseball and volleyball team. He was class president, valedictorian and top of his class. The ideal golden child to any parent to be fucking blunt about it...Apparently his family moved from Italy when he was like fourteen and my dad was the first friend he really made when he was first here, along with my mom because her and my dad grew up together. The three of them were really good friends, and when they were fifteen my parents started dating and right before my mom found out she was pregnant, her and this Blake guy hooked up. It wasn't just a onetime thing, and it was behind my fathers back.

Bella leaned back against the headboard and ran her fingers through her long hair, taking a break for just a moment.

To me, it sounded like a pretty shitty thing to do. I flew off the handle when I found out James had kissed Bella, but I can only imagine what it would feel like to find out the woman you loved slept with your best friend more than once behind your back and didn't even say anything about it. It was one thing to not initiate a kiss; it was one thing to mutually initiate it, take it further and do it multiple times behind their back. The fact that they were all good friends was also downright fucked up.

" After my dad found out… he wasn't even angry he said, he was just devastated, heartbroken and he felt betrayed. On top of the fact that my mom didn't even know who my father was...My dad had already threw away his plans of going to college in Seattle when he found out my mom was pregnant and he was already in the police academy to get a job to support us. Blake was set up to go to Harvard Medical with a full academic and athletic scholarship. My dad said he'd take care of me even if my mom didn't know if I was his or not. And they never did a paternity test because my mom couldn't even consider telling her parents about this because they were very religious. He said that a part of him didn't even want to know anyways."

I couldn't even fathom how Bella felt about all of this. It was hard for her to accept the fact that her father acted the way he did towards her, but the fact that he might not even be her actual father? That was a whole new realm of acceptance and all I could do was sit and stare because I can't even consider how to even make this okay for her.

Fucking fuck...

" I never knew why my parents got divorced...It came out of nowhere and hit me like a fucking bullet. But the day that they told me, my dad had found out that my mom was in contact with Blake again. He was living in Seattle...I never thought much of it, but since I was around eleven my mom would take these trips to Seattle to go shopping every once in awhile. She'd go with a few of her friends, Jess and Angela's mom or so we thought. My dad told me that she was meeting up with him, and she tried to tell him that they were trying to be friends but it turned into more and...My fucking god, Edward...She found out she was pregnant again the night my dad said he wanted a divorce. The same night they sat down and told me they were separating. When she made preparations to move, she didn't even fucking go to Phoenix, there were no 'arrangements' like she said there was. She went to fucking Seattle and four months later she lost the baby and he basically dumped her and then she actually went to Phoenix. For four months I called her telling her I missed her and how I wanted to be with her while she was two hours away in Seattle."

By now Bella was in full-blown tears and I leaned forward and carefully held her in my arms. She wrapped her uninjured arm around my neck and just cried. I rubbed her back and whispered sweet-nothings into her ear to try and soothe her, but I couldn't fix the heartbreak I knew she was feeling. I could only try to make it easier and help her get through it. I fucking hated seeing Bella cry though; there was nothing worse than witnessing it and knowing I couldn't stop it.

" It's going to be okay, love." I whispered, kissing the shell of her ear softly.

" I-I don't even know who my-my fucking dad is..."

I laid back against the bed and made Bella comfortable with me at my side. Nobody bothered us or even knocked on the door to say a word. I was glad that Esme had probably told everybody to give us some space, the last thing Bella needed was Alice and Emmett breathing down her neck with answers, and I could only imagine the quips that Rosalie could come up with about this. I knew that she would have something to say, which was why I was going to keep her the fuck away from Bella because there was no doubt Emmett wouldn't spill his guts if he found out. I knew he wouldn't go around telling everybody, but he would indefinitely tell Rosalie.

The rest of the afternoon and evening was spent with Bella in my arms, and I didn't try to move or ask her if she wanted anything to eat. She needed to get this the fuck out of her system, she at least deserved that. I was just there for her, doing the only thing I could do; which was hold her while she cried.

At around eight thirty she had completely passed out, spent and exhausted. Her eyes were puffy and her face was red and splotched. I wiped a warm cloth over her face carefully not to wake her before slipping out from underneath her and laying her head on a pillow. When I went downstairs I saw Emmett, Jasper and Alice gathered in the family room playing a video game, and mom was sitting in a barstool with an oven mitt next to her side and a magazine in front of her. Carlisle was next to her, a hand on her lower back and a mug in his other hand as they talked to each other quietly.

When I entered the room they both looked up at me, and I could see the blatant concern in my mother's eyes as she stood facing me.

" How's, Bella? Is she alright?"

" No...She's really upset and she just stopped crying and fell asleep. Fuck, I don't know what to do about this. At one point I'm fucking pissed at her dad for just dropping this on her, but another I can't believe all the lies they've webbed together. She feels betrayed and lied to."

" It's understandable. I hope you aren't upset with me for letting him in the house...He just didn't look like he was here to just yell at her for anything, but he told me that he had to talk to Bella before anymore time went on."

My mom wrapped her arms around my waist and I hugged her back tightly.

" I just don't know what to do to make it better for her."

" Sweetie, you can't. All you can do is be there for her. But my goodness I can only imagine how she is wondering how to speak to her mother about this."

" Did Bella tell you everything?"

She nodded and released me, going over to the oven to stop the timer that was now beeping. I sat down in a stool as she pulled a fresh batch of what smelled like peanut butter cupcakes out of the oven. I ran my fingers through my hair and stood to get a bottle of water. I was fucking starving and thirsty as hell; I could only imagine how Bella was going to feel in the morning.

After taking a long, deep pull of the water I sat back in my chair and Esme set a cupcake with frosting on top of it right in front of me. It looked fucking good and I ate it in about two seconds; considering eating the rest of the batch while I was already at it.

" We're all here for her, and in time she'll accept everything for what it is. She might feel the need to contact this other guy, and if she does you have to support her Edward. Don't let her do any of this alone even if she tries to push you out of it."

I knew that Esme was right, and I also knew that Bella would push me away. But I couldn't fucking let her. In a few weeks we would be back in New York anyways, and with all of her injuries I knew she wouldn't be up to searching this guy out and even going to see him. If she did, well I guess I'd be there by her side no matter fucking what.

I made myself a sandwich and scarfed down a few more of the delicious cupcakes before heading back upstairs into the guest bedroom where Bella slept. She was in an even deeper sleep then when I had left her. Hair was sprawled over the pillows and her uninjured leg had kicked the cover off and was hanging off the side of the bed while her body twisted in the opposite direction of it.

Smiling to myself, I set her leg back on the bed but let it uncovered and I pushed her crazy hair out of her face, which wasn't as puffy as before but more calm, which was good to see. I leaned down to kiss her forehead and her nose wrinkled up before she sighed and turned her head to the other side, her casted arm moving to lay on her chest.

I went to my bedroom and changed my clothes before returning to Bella. She was in a completely different position than when I left her, and I knew it could be because she was in here. The first few nights of her being back she slept in here, but then I started taking her into my room, which was more familiar to her sleeping form because once she was asleep there, she didn't move a muscle.

Carefully, not to jostle her, I picked her up and carried her into my bedroom, setting her down on the right side of the bed before shutting the lights off and getting in next to her.

And she was still the rest of the night.

~\\~

I had no idea what the fuck time it was, but I woke up when I could feel the bed moving just slightly, and I couldn't sense or even feel Bella close to me like she had been. When I opened my eyes I saw that she was sitting up, and struggling to do so at the moment. I sat up and reached over to rest my hand on her shoulder gently.

" What's wrong, babe?"

" I need something to drink like now."

I quickly got out of bed and went into the bathroom, grabbing a glass I usually kept in there and filled it with cold water to give to Bella. She literally downed it in two seconds before laying back in bed with a deep breath. I set it down on the end table and took a seat at the side of the bed next to her hip.

" Are you hungry?"

She nodded.

" Okay, I'll go find something downstairs." I said, leaning over to turn on the lamp before heading downstairs.

Esme had made some spaghetti so I heated it up in the microwave and managed to not just sprinkle fucking parmesan over it, but open the wrong side and dump it on top. Well, Bella would eat it anyways so fuck it. I got as much as I could off and went back upstairs with a fork in hand and a hot plate full of dinner.

Bella was just taking her medicine, which somehow got into my room, with the glass of water when I returned and I jumped onto the bed, making her roll her eyes at me before I set the spaghetti carefully in her lap.

" Thanks."

" Are you alright?" I asked carefully, tucking a strand of her hair behind her ear.

She set her fork down and tears welled up in her eyes. I knew she was trying hard to fight it all off and brush it off her shoulder like she attempts to do with everything else. It was always hard for her to just sit and cry it out like most people do, she tried being stronger than that, and bigger for that matter. But all of this was enough to fucking swallow her whole.

" I just can't deal with all of this. These fucking injuries, the fact that I can never even have a baby and my parents... they lied to me from the day I was fucking born. It's too much, Edward. It's way too much and I don't know what to do."

I took the plate of food from her lap and rested my hands on either side of her face, forcing her to look at me. I used my thumbs to wipe the tears from her eyes, not being able to stand seeing her like this. It broke my heart.

" We'll take it a day at a time, Bella. That's all we can do. This isn't the time to make hard and fast decisions."

" How could they do this to me? How could they put me in this position, and now of all times? Why is now the right time?"

" Baby, I don't know. I wish I could figure out what to do...But I just...Bella-"

She rested her left hand on my wrist and closed her eyes, more tears falling. This wasn't something that either of us were going to be able to actually fix, but it was something we were going to have to figure out for the sake of Bella. I didn't want her consistently upset over this, although I knew that it wasn't going to be a light situation at all. The fact that Charlie dropped it on her now and not years ago after the divorce, or even before the divorce, made me wonder what he and Renee were thinking in the first place...or not thinking

No time would be the right time for this, I understood that, but this story shouldn't have had to be told the way it did. It would have been at least somewhat easier if they sat down to discuss it in detail; not like this. Not after the awful relationship Charlie and Bella had, and especially not after her mother being across the fucking country. On top of it all; I didn't even know how to handle this. I couldn't even come up with something to say!

" What's done is done...We can't change the situation and you can't do anything about it." she said, " I know that."

I leaned forward to kiss the tip of her nose. " We'll figure it out, my love, we always do."

~\\~

August 24th

Sunday

~\\~

It was a rare sunny day in Forks, Washington. Everybody was already back in school or soaking in the last few days of summer until it was back in session. Tomorrow Alice was going to be starting her first day of her senior year in high school and in early September Bella and I would be off to New York to resume college.

Emmett and Rosalie were going to be leaving for University of Washington sometime this week, and my mom was sad that everybody was going to be gone. She was fucking moping like crazy but once we left she'd have Carlisle, and Alice was still here as well.

Today was going to be a good day though, because Bella was going to be getting her arm cast off. She was itching to get that bulky fucking weight off of her and so was it. It would be nice to be able to be in bed with her and not worry about being knocked in the face when we sleep.

The past few weeks had been hard on her, but she was trying to get back to normal. I knew that on the inside she was conflicted, and it didn't help when Renee had called Bella, completely freaking out after Charlie called her after saying he told Bella everything. Trying to placate her, Renee repeatedly told Bella that Charlie was her father, but I knew that she didn't believe it at all. They only had a five minute phone conversation before Bella hung up on her. I knew it was hard for her to do that to her mother, because she'd always thought she was on her side and always honest; but apparently both of her parents wronged her in the worse ways possible.

Charlie had stopped by last week to talk to Bella again, this time I was actually there, and while he hated me and treated me like I was scum on the bottom of his shoe, he didn't say shit when I refused for them to talk to each other alone. Last time I couldn't prevent it because I was gone, but I'll be damned if I'd let her alone with him again. With him he brought a small box that had pictures of Blake, Charlie and Renee back in their high school years all the way up until Bella was born. There were hundreds of photos of them together.

When Bella and I viewed the pictures of Blake; It was unmistakable that he was her father, there were no more 'maybe' or 'might be' when I looked at it. The fact that they considered he wasn't was denial. I could see the fucking pain in her eyes and even in Charlie's upon seeing it though. It was obvious that he wished none of it turned out that way; but there was still no explanation for why he started to treat Bella that way. He didn't seem to talk about it at all, but Bella told me that the way he was acting around her now, being careful with his words and generally hesitant, was how he was when the divorce papers were being filed and her parents were in the middle of separating. I could tell it was awkward for her to be around him. It was weird for me to be around him too; he was being too…nice.

But the pictures...It was really fucking weird.

I'd thought Bella looked a lot like Renee, but she also had a good dose of her actual father. She had his exact dark brown hair, along with his sharp jaw and even their smiles looked identical. And Bella's mom had a natural tanned skin, while Blake didn't; just like Bella, it was an alabaster tone. They had the same nose and small ears; it was kind of freaky.

For days Bella just stared at pictures of him. I still catch her sitting in my bedroom with a picture in her hand. I was sure that she was complete shock over everything. I held her while she cried, not knowing what to do or if she should try to contact him or meet him. I could understand why she wouldn't want to, but I could also understand why she did; there were two different reasons to the situation.

From the sounds of it, she was just really confused about everything but I tried not to talk about it unless she wanted to. We'd been spending the better of our time having Bella adjust to NYU's online classes; she talked to all her professors that were supposed to be holding the classes she was in to let them know the situation. Usually professors didn't really give a flying fuck if students were in a fickle and couldn't go to class; they'd fail them or just drop them from the class, but they seemed to understand and next semester Bella would be able to slide right back into her usual classes.

Unfortunately, RBC basically dropped Bella when they found out she couldn't resume her work when she returned to New York, and she was very stressed about finding a job. She decided that once the new semester started that she'd send in applications around to find a job. Since we would be sharing an apartment, she completely felt the need to contribute while I told her I didn't want it. So we settled on she would pay for groceries and keep the place clean. She only glared at me when I suggested it, because she knew that I knew how much she loved walking around stores to get food and get ideas for dinner since she loves to cook. And the fact that she has at least one day a week where she randomly obsessively cleans. For now she wouldn't be able to, but I knew that she would be able to cook a little bit when we got closer to fall. She was already attempting to help Esme in the kitchen when she was downstairs; but her fractured hip holds her back immensely.

Honestly, I wanted to take care of Bella myself. Although the money I used to get by with were from a trust fund that I got access to when I was eighteen. There was money from my grandparent's death, money my parents put in there for school, and every year on my birthday or holidays my father would send me a generous amount of money. He always said that with all that he makes he needs to do something with it. I believed he still did it because of how bad he felt about the divorce and my struggle in dealing with it. Even though I had a pretty hefty amount of money, I didn't use it to just throw around on stupid shit.

As I'd said, Bella and I were going to live comfortably for the rest of our lives, but I didn't want the live the life that my mom and Carlisle have together. Full of huge mansions, diamonds, priceless art and hallways as long as the golden fucking gate bridge with a thousand doors like in a Dr. Seuss movie. I did want Bella to have a good life, I did want to treat her to the best but I wanted to do it with normalcy. I wanted a place that felt like _home, _that was how I grew up as a kid.

And even if Bella and I were never going to be able to have a child of our own; I still wanted us to live like that if it was just us two.

We were going to be heading back to New York on Tuesday, and we had already settled on an apartment actually thanks to Carlisle. He was good with real estate shit and whatever, and my mother had a blast picking out my apartment. They were insisting on paying for the rent, and I didn't bother to argue with my mom. I relented and she got online and started to go crazy the moment I gave her the go ahead.

She ended up finding a place in New York City known as Columbus Square, which is within short walking distance of NYU and Juilliard. When I found out the price for a one bedroom and one bath I almost choked. It was six thousand a month, but there was only one unit left. We didn't get to see any pictures of the place, but mostly because there was no furniture and my mom wanted to have everything set up for when we get there so it was a complete surprise. It was relieving to not have to deal with all of it, I was grateful.

I pulled into the parking lot of the hospital, able to break out of my thoughts, and helped Bella out of it before setting her in a wheelchair, which she fucking detested, but she couldn't exactly walk more than just a few feet away before being in extreme and unbearable pain.

I went to the desk and told the lady we had an appointment with Dr. Gerandy. We only had to wait for a little while, and Bella was tapping her converse shoe on the linoleum floor nervously. Once he walked in we went to the third exam room and he shut the door.

" You look even better than the last time I saw you. How have you been, Bella?" he asked, grabbing her chart.

She smiled, " Good, even better to get this thing off of me."

" I can only imagine. Well, once we get your cast off I'm going to warn you; things might not look very pretty. There will be plenty of bruising, and possible cuts that are hopefully mostly healed. You will have a new sling you will have to wear for two weeks, after that you will be able to stop using it. I'd talked to Carlisle, and he said that he was going to be getting in contact with doctors in New York to take care of you. I was planning on giving a call but he just copied your file and said he'd send it off and have it faxed so all will be set up and well."

Bella nodded and I held her hand tightly. Before doing anything, he went to grab a sling, which was a dark blue color and made out of a thin canvas-like fabric. It was better quality than the one she had now over her cast. A nurse came back with him for assistance and he brought out the casting saw that had a sharp blade. I turned Bella's face towards mine when I saw the expression on her face. She looked at me nervously and I held her hand tighter.

" It won't hurt a bit." Dr. Gerandy assured her before turning it on.

The cast was cut right down the middle of it, slicing through all of the little designs people made on it and little I love you's that I put on it when she was sleeping. He asked her if she wanted to keep the cast and she refused immediately. She looked down at her arm, and he was right, it did look green and yellow in some places, along with purple and blue in others. There were small cuts on her arm, and there were a lot of ones that looked like they were turning into unfortunate scars.

He was just about to fit the sling on her arm, but Bella pulled away momentarily from him.

" Do you mind if I just...Wash my arm off. I've just been dying to?..."

" Oh, of course. Go for it."

Bella stretched her arm out, and winced just a little. She hadn't been able to in a long time, and I could only imagine how happy she was that she could finally do more on her own now. I helped her down off the table and she washed her arm completely with anti-bacterial soap before letting Dr. Gerandy fit the sling on her.

He told her that she could shower without it or take it off when needed, but to keep it on as much as possible. Afterwards he went over her other injuries and asking questions about her leg. He touched her pelvis gently, asking her questions about the pain. It was still very tender right now considering she still had at least two months to go at the minimum healing rate, but he said that she was progressing and bouncing back rather quick which was good to hear. Her arm had healed very well in two months after it being somewhat shattered, that was a miracle itself.

We talked a little bit longer before he wished Bella luck in New York and we headed back home. I was in the middle of packing our things to prepare for flying back. That alone was enough to deal with, especially because I was first trying to get all of Bella's things out of the guest room and into my room so that it would be easier to get together in one place.

Once we got home my mom was starting dinner, and I'd taken Bella out to eat at the diner. She was able to sit up better these days although it was slightly uncomfortable, but she insisted on eating out; I think it was because she was craving a burger terribly and my mother never really made anything grilled unless it was chicken. I carried Bella into my arms heading to the kitchen and she didn't bother to argue anymore, just resting her head on my chest because it was a long afternoon for her. I set her on the couch in the living room and draped a blanket over her as her eyes started to close and went to the kitchen.

I talked a bit to my mom about Bella's injuries and helped a little bit with dinner. She was making a vegetable roast so she needed a lot cut up. While I cut the vegetables, she seasoned the tenderloin and started on making a cappuccino cake for desert that I knew Bella would absolutely devour.

Alice had bounded downstairs to let Jasper in the house once dinner was getting closer, and I joined Bella in the living room watching television with them as she laid between my legs, her back to my chest. It was really the only comfortable position for her. I wrapped my arms around her, resting my hands on her waist as I gently touched the skin there. She was falling in and out of sleep every few minutes, unable to stay asleep but it didn't help that Jasper was constantly poking and tickling Alice to make her laugh.

" Can you guys stop getting all fucking handsy like a couple of fifteen year olds?" I whispered harshly.

Alice glared, " This is the last day we get to be together before Jasper leaves, so shut up Edward."

" Well, I don't give a fuck. Bella had a long day and you keep waking her up."

" Everything is always about her! Bella this, Bella that. It's getting really annoying Edward."

My eyes narrowed at her and she seemed to back off. Jasper gave her a look and they both got up and left the room without a word between us, which I was thankful for. I didn't want them fucking bothering her, and I didn't care if Alice thought all attention was on Bella; she only cared because it wasn't on her. Since Bella was with me, she was what all my attention was on; Alice was going to have to get the fuck over it.

Bella started to turn to her left side, wincing slightly as her body registered the pain of the position, but Bella always laid on her side when she slept. It was a natural movement. I grabbed the blanket and bunched it between my leg and her side to cushion it a little bit. After that she was content and out like a light. I ended up eating on the couch with her asleep on me. She was a complete rock as she slept because of the pills she was on, but resting was the best fucking thing for her these days.

At eight thirty I carried her upstairs to my bed and laid her down. She was wearing a pair of jersey shorts that were stretchy enough to fit around her cast so I slipped them off as well as the t-shirt she wore and grabbed a nightgown from the drawers to slip on her. She barely even woke up. I slipped her sock off and kissed the top of her foot before brushing my teeth and eliminating a few layers of clothing and getting into bed with her.

I used to always lay on her right, but since the accident I laid on her left because she always finds herself trying to get into my arms at night. I missed being able to pull her up against me, and it would be easier once her pelvis was completely healed, but it would be another three months until I had my Bella fully back and in working order.

" I love you." I heard her whisper quietly next to me.

" I love you, too, beautiful."

She smiled and used her left arm to pull on my right. I relented and rolled over to lie on my stomach with my head in the crook of her neck and her uninjured arm around me while I carefully draped my arm across her. I could feel Bella's left hand laying against my lower back, pulling up my white undershirt and touching the skin softly which fucking tickled. I twitched against her and suddenly a quiet giggle emitted from her.

" Stop it." I groaned, biting her neck just the slightest.

The more she did it the harder I started to bite her until finally she let out a loud yelp that was enough to wake up the entire house. I covered her mouth with my hand and shook my head at her.

" Do you want everybody rushing in here?" I whispered, playfully nipping at her ear.

The yelp turned into a quiet moan and I moved my hand from her mouth to rest on the side of her neck. I kissed across her cheekbone and down to her soft, full lips. God knows that I wanted to just take her right then and there, but I couldn't and I wouldn't be able to for months. The mere thought made me groan; I really had to suck it the fuck up for Bella though. She was the one in pain going through this shit and I couldn't be the boyfriend who only thought about having sex with her.

" Don't start something you know we can't finish." she told me, pulling away.

I groaned and rolled over to the other side of the bed before sitting up and walking across to turn the television on and switch the mode it was on. I found a random DVD for us to watch which just happened to be Superbad.

About an hour into the movie Bella looked over at me, " I feel like I'm sixteen watching this."

" Two years shy, what's the difference."

" You're four years shy, old man."

I sighed, " I'd prove you very wrong on that 'old man' statement if I could."

She gave me a look before turning over towards her left and curling up against a pillow.

" Don't get all moody on me now." I sighed, coming up behind her and kissing the sensitive spot on the back of her neck that immediately made her laugh.

" That doesn't tickle does it Bella?" I teased, doing it again as she cringed and laughed before turning over and glaring at me.

" Stop."

I ran my fingers through her long hair, " Don't be so uptight."

" That's not very nice to say." she replied as I placed kisses all over her face, the cool metal of the rings dragging over her warm skin. " God, someone is in a fucking mood today, hm?"

" I just love you."

She linked her left hand with mine, " I'm right here, Edward. And I'm not going anywhere."

I leaned forward and rested my head on her chest. She did this to me. She made me feel vulnerable. He made me scared to lose something so important for once in my life. I didn't know what else to do but shower her with how much I fucking loved her, hoping that would be enough to keep her safe from everything else, but it couldn't.

" I can't wait to see the new apartment." I whispered to her.

" Me either; I know it's going to be great."

**Authors Note- As I said, fillerish, but I hope you guys liked the backstory on everything with Blake!**

**Next chapter is still WIP, I'm close to being done but not quite!**

**Leave me thoughts on Blake and maybe get me to 600 reviews? It'd be so exciting!**

**REVIEWS get SPECIAL TEASERS!**


	42. For The First Time

**Authors Note- You don't even want to know...**

**Disclaimer- S. Meyer owns all things Twilight.**

**Chapter Song: For The First Time by: The Script**

~\\~

BPOV

~\\~

I leaned back in the weird pod-shaped bed/seat. It was comfortable, but it was weird as fuck. Edward looked like the picture of elegance as he laid back and looked at the movie screen in front of him. I believed it was Transformers, and I was actually amazed they actually had this in a plane. It was ridiculous.

" You feeling alright? Need any more blankets, or any meds for pain?"

" I'm alright."

He knew that I had taken my medicine this morning right before we left, and trust me, I could feel it kicking in. The shit was strong, and it made me sleep the days away; but when I was sleeping I couldn't feel allthe pain I was in, that was what mattered to me. I pushed up the annoying armrest that was keeping me from Edward and he put his arm around me and rested my head on his shoulder.

The past few weeks I could say in all honesty; I couldn't do without Edward here with me.

My mind was still unable to wrap around the fact that my dad...Isn't actually even my dad.

Blake Moretti.

He was my father.

I didn't exactly know what to expect when Esme had knocked on my door that afternoon; Charlie at her side. I knew that she would never let anybody near me who would harm me, but the situation between Charlie and I was complicated, we never got along ever since my parents' divorce and that was that.

We argued, he had raised his hand to me more than one time, and to be perfectly honest I didn't want anything at all to do with him after I moved out; it was the reason why I left earlier than I had planned. I'd never expect him to come after me and try to resolve anything, imagine my surprise when he shows up at my bedroom door wanting to talk to me.

At first I didn't believe it, mostly because I didn't think mom would keep something like that from me. Ever. We were always open and honest about things, but this...This was a new realm of betrayal and not only from her, but from him as well. I could understand that honestly, there would have never been a right time to tell me all of this, but waiting this long made everything all the worse. It made me wonder if I could have gone my whole life basically living a lie, not knowing that Charlie wasn't my father; and I knew he wasn't.

It was obvious Charlie didn't accept that he wasn't my father. He knew he wasn't but instead of accepting the truth he lashed out at me instead; as if this was my fault. As if I'd been the one to do this, and maybe if I was actually Charlie's things would have been different, but maybe they wouldn't have. I wouldn't ever know.

Blake Moretti and I looked alike, it was uncanny. I grew up thinking that I just looked more like my mother and that was just that. But when I saw the pictures of him as a teenager; I knew that it was unmistakable. He was my actual father. We had similar features, and I'd be able to confidently say that I probably looked more like him than my mother. Realizing that made me feel sick, and I couldn't believe that after all the things I've dealt with; this had to just add to it. I couldn't believe that my father was alive in the world right now and I didn't even know him.

When I confronted my mother about it over the phone... It didn't last more than two minutes before I hung up on her in tears. She was shocked, and attempted to use all the excuses in the book why she didn't tell me; but no excuse that anybody could conjure up would make any of this any better. I felt betrayed and downright lied to, and I had a right to feel that way. There were so many times that my parents could have told me; but they didn't.

But it wasn't just them I felt betrayed by...it was also from the man who was supposedly my father. It made me feel awful inside that they covered me up and passed me off as Charlie's because he didn't want his future ruined. It made me feel worthless, not good enough.

Did he want to know me? Did he even care?

I also wondered if my mother was still in contact with him to this day, but I haven't dared try to talk to her. I was tempted to ask Charlie, but I didn't exactly get the vibe that he actually liked talking to this guy. For all intents and purposes, Charlie was my dad growing up. He did all the things that dad's did, which to me was the most important. Biological technicalities doesn't make a difference, just because you are a dad doesn't mean you actually are if you don't act like one. In my childhood I had a great dad; that was until my parents' divorce.

And we'd yet to talk about why he started to treat me the way he did, then again we'd finally been able to talk for more than a minute without biting each other's heads off, so maybe that was meant for a future conversation. I was angry, I wanted to know why, but before I could get those answers I was on a plane to New York with a casted leg and an injured, but healing, pelvis.

I didn't know if I would ever talk to my father again. Hell, I didn't know if I was going to talk to my mother again; just as I didn't know if I wanted to try and contact my actual father. I knew that for right now I couldn't take that on and frankly...I didn't fucking want to. Maybe it sounded childish, but it was the last thing I could think about doing right now. From the sounds of it, he didn't even want anything to do with me; why should I bother anyways?

But there were so many things I wondered about, was he married? Did he have any children? Because if he did they would be my siblings, and that thought alone blew my fucking mind!

Edward looked over at me, sensing my distress that was probably coming off of me in waves.

" Stop worrying about everything." he said, leaning over to kiss me soundly.

I looked away, " I can't help it. This is my life; I can't not worry about it."

" I know, but your appetite has been almost non-existent, you're constantly sleeping and barely have any energy for anything."

" Oh, yeah, I mean; it's not like I have a reason to sleep a lot and have no energy because I got into a car accident." I said with an annoyed tone as I rolled my eyes at him.

He sighed, exasperated, " That's not what I mean and you know it, Bella. Yes, the accident made you sleep a lot because of medicine and your body healing, but at least you were eating, and alert when you are awake. Not a walking dead person."

" Well, fuck me for being stressed about finding out my dad isn't actually my dad." I snapped, " Not all of us can be in Edward Masen positive fucking land."

The look on his face made me regret ever word that came out of my mouth. I didn't want to take out my anger out on him; after all the shit he's done for me he didn't deserve it at all. When I went to open my mouth to apologize to him he made a motion with his hand that told me not to bother. He shrugged me off and I moved my head from his shoulder as he pushed the armrest down to separate us.

Fuck.

~\\~

A six and a half hour flight not talking to Edward was miserable at best.

After he waved me off I didn't try to apologize or say anything. He was very obviously upset at the way I snapped at him, and while I knew Edward wasn't one of those sensitive guys; I still got to him by my tone. Even though I didn't mean to act that way towards him; it was irrelevant. I knew not to mess with him when he was in a bad mood, especially not when he couldn't get up and walk away to clear his head so I stayed silent.

Two hours into the flight I reclined the seat back, because sitting up for long periods of time strained my pelvic area and it started to hurt. Surprisingly, I was able to sleep for a while on the plane while Edward stared blankly at the small television in front of him that played some recent popular movie.

Our flight had been early in the morning at 6:50AM, and we would be landing at around 3:26AM, this included the time differences. I was a little excited to see the apartment, all Edward had told me was that Esme had taken care of everything; including decor and furniture and I wasn't allowed to argue or say anything about it according to both of them.

When we had landed, Edward retrieved the carryon bag and wordlessly helped me off of the plane. I didn't need a wheelchair or anything, but I was trying to use crutches which weren't that bad actually. I couldn't strain my leg anyways, so this helped for getting around for short periods of time. The airport was utterly and completely packed and Edward had to fight his way to baggage claim. Firstly he had to get a cart to carry all of it, so he lifted four bags onto a airport luggage trolley and we headed to the front to get a cab. We first had to pick up my truck, which had been sitting in a parking lot all summer and I hoped that it was alright.

After we'd finally gotten a cab, our bags were in the back and we were heading to my old dorm building after directing the taxi man.

Edward and I sat side by side awkwardly, and I sighed, looking over at him because I really didn't want to fight with him anymore. It was stupid and completely my fault.

" I'm sorry for being a bitch."

" It's fine."

I shook my head, " No, it's not. I let it all get to my head and take control. I need to stop doing that."

He glanced over at me, " I know that; but you can't just get all defensive and bitchy when someone tries to talk you down from it or try to be fucking positive for once. I'm only being that way for you, you should get that."

Edward didn't say anything after that, and I didn't bother to push him. When we got to my old dorm building the parking lot was packed, but my truck stood out among all of the other cars. It was a huge, red, beast of a thing but it was mine; and I loved it. From all the walking I did today, I was limping and wincing as I got around; but I was attempting to suck it up.

When we got to the car I gave my keys to Edward after he got all of the bags in. He came to my side and helped me into the passenger side; letting me adjust before shutting the door and getting in. I'd never seen Edward drive my truck that I can think of, usually because we'd always drive his car around when we were in Forks.

He started up the car and nearly hit the roof as the noise it made, which only made me fight a laugh. Then he took his phone out to get directions to the new apartment. He was taking forever and a half and I was exhausted. Ignoring the fact that he was probably pissed at me, even after I apologized, and for valid reasons because I can be a fucking bitch. I leaned over and rested my head on his shoulder as I slid across the bench seat.

" I love you."

With a sigh he wrapped his right arm around me and pulled me against his side, using his left hand to navigate around the phone. After he pulled up everything we backed out of the space and headed out of the lot heading towards the new apartment. It was only fifteen minutes from NYU, and less than ten minutes away from Juilliard.

When we pulled up the building, it was _huge_ and I couldn't believe the size. The front of the building had reflective glass panels all in the front from top to bottom, and if the outside of the building was this beautiful, I could only imagine the inside of it. From the looks, it had to have more than twenty levels and it was astonishing; nothing less than that. Around it there were other shops like Sephora and there were also banks and other small shopping area's that looked very nice.

Without bothering to grab any of the bags, Edward just hopped out of the car and helped me out before we started to head in.

Even the _lobby_ was unbelievable. There were white marble floors, ivory armchairs and glass coffee and end tables. Small trinkets were placed here and there, but looking at it made me afraid to touch anything; it was much more luxurious than I was used to. Edward grimaced when he saw it, and I wondered what he thought about all of this. Esme was the one who did put all of this together, but I wondered if this wasn't at all what he wanted.

Me? I didn't care. I'd be happy in a cardboard box as long as I had Edward with me.

We walked up to a desk that was made out of solid dark wood. A lady stood behind it, her black hair pulled back into a tight bun and her lips painted a dark, cherry red. She looked a little too young to look so professional, but I leaned against Edward and kept my mouth shut.

" My name is Edward Masen, my mother, Esme Cullen has a key waiting here for me for-"

Before he could finish his sentence, the lady had reached to grab something in front of her. Out of a drawer, she pulled out an item and held and elegant hand out towards Edward with a silver key hanging off of her finger. Edward took it from her with short 'thank you' and led me to the elevator. We passed various rooms on the way, and I saw a gym room, laundry room, and a few others before we were in the elevator heading up. He hit the number twenty one and the doors shut. All around were mirrors and there was a long, cream colored ottoman set in the corner.

" I think I regret asking my mother to do all of this."

I looked at up at him curiously, wondering what he was thinking instead of dancing around it by that small comment.

" Why?"

" I don't want this whole glamorous million dollar apartment." he said in a short tone.

I squeezed his hand and in front of us the door opened. We stepped through and stopped at a door just a few steps ahead in a luxurious, bright hallway. Edward used one of the two keys on the ring to unlock the door, and in front of me it swung open.

Edward stepped in on the light hardwood floors and I followed next to him until pausing where the entire apartment was spread out in front of me. My breath caught and I was taken aback by how beautiful it actually was, but not overwhelmingly so.

" Wow."

Down the short hallway from the front door on the left of me was a small kitchen, but it was a nice size for both Edward and I. It held all stainless steel appliances, such as a fridge, stove/oven and microwave. On the one side there was just a little bit of counter space on either side of the stove. Above it was the microwave, and around it were about four cabinets. Across from it had more counter space and a sink, as well as a small bar above it with three teardrop lights hanging from the ceiling. I stepped forward and saw three, square shaped stools with black leather upholstery for sitting at the bar.

Right behind it was a very modern looking glass table that already had four sets of place settings on it with a small bowl decoration in the middle. The living room was right next to the kitchen and small dining area, and it was my favorite part so far. The entire wall on the left was made from all glass panels, along with the wall across from it. A chocolate brown leather couch was pushed against it, with a round glass coffee table, which matched the dining room table, in front of the couch with a white area floor rug. There was also an extra brown arm chair and on the opposite wall of the couch was a lowboy TV cabinet that had a honey colored wood and cabinet space below. On top of it sat a big flat screen that looked to be about fifty or sixty inches big. On either side help two lamps, and a decoration that tied the room together.

The end of the couch had a black floor lamp that was nice and modern for extra light if it was needed

Edward was looking around, seeming in a lot better mood than he had been in the elevator. He put his arm around my waist and turned me around to look down the hallway where the bathroom and coat closet were. The bathroom was really nice, incredible actually. There were two sinks installed into the counters with cabinet space in there, as well as the two mirrors above that opened. The shower had the bath inside of it and was taking over an entire side of the bathroom with the toilet next to it.

There were so many switches for the shower it was dizzying, and the tub was thin but it was nice. I noticed the glass panels on that wall immediately, but Edward assured me that we could see out of the windows, but nobody could see in.

" I don't want random citizens seeing me naked."

He chuckled at me and rolled his eyes.

I'd thought that the living room was my absolute favorite, but the moment I went into the bedroom I fell in love. There were glass panels all around giving a beautiful view of the scenery and buildings around us. The bed was to the right centered in the middle of the room, with double closet doors on the left side next to the bed, and it was king sized with white pleated comforters, white pillows and a light wood headboard. On either side of the bed were light wood end tables with red accent vases to add color to the room. It also held a tan colored rug at the end of the bed and a dresser across the room.

Across from the bed was what completely sold me on the entire apartment.

Across from the room was a small loveseat with a small glass table, and next to that were double French doors lading out to a small little balcony that had a little table and two outdoor cushion chairs. I was in love.

" Edward this is...This is way too much."

He sighed, " Do you love it?"

" Yes, I do, but-"

" That's all that matters. I want you to be happy and comfortable and at home here most importantly."

I limped over to the bed and sat down carefully, but awkwardly; immediately sinking into the soft comforter.

" This is really nice." I sighed.

" I'm going to bring our bags up as well as have someone help me with our boxes to bring up."

I nodded, " Okay. I'm sorry I can't do much, Edward, really, I feel aw-"

Edward tossed me the apartment key from the key ring, now only one hanging from it.

" Relax, take a nap. Although, my mother seemed to have forgotten curtains to make it darker, but that's alright." he said with a chuckled.

I rolled over into the soft bed and heard Edward's laughing all the way out the front door.

~\\~

Our first night in the apartment was...weird.

Edward helped me out in the shower and also showered himself before we sat in the living room and he sorted out our movies, CD's, books and other thing into the cabinets. I set small picture frames on top of it even though he argued with me helping out. I sighed and just sat on the couch, running my fingers through my damp hair until he got up from his spot to kiss me and assure me he had everything under control.

Once things were mostly settled in, we were exhausted and ready to go to bed. He helped me take off my sling and I stretched my arm out. It didn't hurt too much anymore, just a bruising-type pain but it wasn't unbearable by any means. The fact that it had been a shattered bone at some point surprised me at how well it had healed.

After spending a hours up hours of sorting and putting things together we were both beat. Edward ordered some pizza from a place, we enjoyed our simple dinner in our new apartment and we decided to get some sleep. We changed into our pajamas and Edward curled up to my safe right side and placed kisses all along my neck.

" It's nice here, not too over the top." he said, shifting underneath the soft cotton covers.

" We have to call her and thank her for all of this."

He nodded his head in agreement and rested his hand on my stomach.

" It's too bad we can't break in this bed tonight."

I rolled my eyes at his typical male thoughts and carefully moved my right arm over to grab his hand with mine.

" Give it a couple of months."

" Months." he groaned, " I'm not sure how long I can survive, baby. I'm not that strong."

" Do you need to find someone else to fulfill your needs?"

Edward dramatically rolled his eyes back at me as I did to him, holding me impossibly closer to his side. I wished that I could just roll over and lay in his arms, but it would be a long while until I could do that. It was frustrating.

" Silly girl. Like I'd want anybody but you."

I smiled and leaned up to kiss his cheek softly. His eyes fluttered closed, and he actually looked peaceful for once.

Sometimes I felt bad that all of my drama and problems reflected back and affected him; I didn't want that, but it always made me see how much he loved me because he was always there for me whenever I needed him; even if I wanted to be alone. I just hoped that being back in New York, away from my family and problems it would be better and we could really start to connect together without the drama and just be us. No overbearing mothers, no obnoxious brothers or crazy shopping addicts running around.

My hand ran over his stubble from him not shaving in just under a week; infact, he was almost growing a beard. It was pretty impressive for that many days; I'd admit. He looked more rugged though, reminding me of our days in the hospital with him being there for days at a time.

" I know, I know; I need to shave." he mumbled, running his hand over his mouth and his chin.

" I was just going to say you were ruggedly handsome, but sure, whatever so pleases you."

He opened one eye, " Whatever so pleases me, Isabella?"

I giggled, " Yes."

" I'd tickle you to death if I could, keep that in mind. I'll be making up for months of everything I couldn't do with you."

" In that case we won't be leaving the bed for a year."

Edward groaned, " Stop making it harder."

" That's what he said." I quipped.

He poked my side and I cringed and moved away, " Stop it!"

Instead he did it once more and before I could find a way to sit up or move, he turned his body to face me and covered my mouth with his, swallowing the words I was about to say. For the first time in what seemed like forever he really kissed me, his tongue tracing my lips before delving deep into my mouth as if he couldn't kiss me deep enough. I carefully lifted up my bruised arm, being mindful of it before reaching over Edward and taking a good handful of his ass; making him groan low in my mouth.

The stubble on his jaw, cheeks and chin brushed up against my skin roughly, and while I knew it would probably burn my skin later on; I didn't care. I felt his fingers sink deep into my long hair as he massaged his tongue against mine, lips caressing each others.

I could feel my chest heaving quickly and soon enough I was breathing heavily enough for it to start hurting, the pain radiating into my stomach and lower abdominal area. I broke away from him and rested my hand on his stomach, focusing carefully on breathing.

" Fuck, I'm sorry, babe. I got too carried away."

I slid my hand from his backside up to his hip and looked up at him.

" I'm okay." I assured him, rubbing the side of my face. He leaned down to kiss the probably reddened skin and dragged me against him, kissing the top of my head and peppering my forehead with kisses.

" This is just fucking...frustrating." he said, clicking his tongue ring against his teeth, laying back.

" So sex is really all guys think about?"

" Mostly."

" How much would you say percentage wise?"

" Ninety seven."

" This includes you?"

" Yes?"

" When did you first think about sex and me in the same sentence?"

" The second after your ass hit the ground. I was like, fuck, I need to bang this chick; hard. And then you cock blocked me for weeks." He said, purposely sounding like an ass.

I laughed before mock glaring at him, " You can blame me for cock blocking. We didn't start having sex for months after New York because of _you_."

" It's different."

" So what you are saying is that it's no big deal to screw around the first few days you meet someone, but a big deal if you take a break from a relationship and get back together and not screw around."

" Precisely."

" You are something else, you know that? So what, when I get the go ahead to have sex then we're going to wait again?"

" No."

" I don't understand your logic."

" Goodnight, Bella."

~\\~

I was bored.

So fucking bored out of my goddamn mind.

Edward was busy with school, which left me sitting in an apartment all alone for more than half the day. Even though I have enough online work I have to do; I sure as fuck didn't want to spend all of my time doing that, because eventually that got even more boring than being alone.

So I'd wait, and wait, attempt to walk around the apartment until my hip would scream in pain and I'd eventually have to lay down and be stuck with only the entertainment provided with a computer. I was pretty sure I saw every YouTube video from Peanut Butter Jelly Time to Whats in My fucking Makeup bag videos. It was a wide range of weird videos and I was really getting bored.

Online school was really easy, but it was also easy to get sick of, and by the time Edward would get home I was dying for human interaction. This mainly sucked because most of the time he was sitting out in the family room when he didn't have classes to work on his compositions or other homework he had to do for the classes. Usually after all that he'd give himself time to eat and then collapse in bed after helping me shower or do something. I was very appreciative of him still trying to help me, but I missed him. A lot.

I knew I'd probably been spoiled because I was used to him being around me constantly; never leaving my side. It wasn't like I felt like I needed him everywhere, or I was anxiety ridden over it...I just missed my fucking boyfriend.

That included all the things involving the word 'boyfriend'.

In just a week I was going to be going to the hospital to see my new doctor here, and I knew they wanted to start physical therapy within the next two months because of my leg. If it was immobile for too long who knew what would happen, but I was glad to wake up every week or two to feel that the pain in my hip, thigh and pelvis was going down. I already had tossed out the sling for my arm and it was working just fine now. I was now able to make use of the crutches I had with me and it didn't strain my arm at all or cause pain.

I had just clicked out of my first finished test for my English Composition class when Edward walked through the door. He let his heavy shoulder bag fall to the floor with a loud, resounding _thud _and grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge.

" Hey." he said, leaning over to kiss me softly on the lips.

" How was class?"

" Good, tiring. I smell pasta salad."

" I got bored."

He collapsed down on the couch next to me and unscrewed the cap of his water bottle, turning towards me with a glare.

" What did I say about you walking around here doing shit?"

" I'm bored!"

Edward rolled his eyes, " I get it. But the more you put weight on your injuries the longer it will take to heal."

At that point, I was just annoyed with him; for once wishing he would leave me alone.

He wasn't the one stuck here all day, nobody to fucking talk to and nothing to do. Cooking was the only thing that I could really conjure up to do. It kept my mind busy on the task at hand and the outcome would feed me, and Edward. As well as the fact that it kept me feeling like I was useful and actually doing something around here; if I couldn't pick up a vacuum at least I could make dinner.

" You try being here all alone, all day with nothing to do! I can't sit and do homework from eight in the morning to eight at night, Edward; I'll go insane. Making food is the only thing to even do around here since I can't go out."

" I'll buy you some fucking yarn; knit a blanket. I don't want you walking around this apartment all day."

I stood up and grabbed my crutches, adjusting myself on them before heading towards the bedroom.

" Where are you going?"

" Honestly, Edward, just leave me the fuck alone. You don't get it, any of this. You get to run around all la-de-fucking-da going to school and whatever the fuck you do, and I'm stuck here with all of this! I don't need you to tell me what to do and what not to do; I was just fine all on my own when it was just me taking care of myself. I left my dad's house because he tried to control me and tell me what to do and treated me like shit; I won't let you do it to me, too."

I slammed the door behind me and threw the crutches at it before falling down onto the bed, leaning forward to put my head in my hands.

I was frustrated, and he didn't understand this. I felt weak, helpless and I wasn't used to this. I hated needing help for everything. I could even fucking take a shower on my own.

Of course it was easy for him to tell me not to do shit…Everything for him was normal. He could go out and do something, feel worth something, contribute around the house, and the moment I try it's as if I was tapping into dark spirits in the fucking underworld of hell to break out all of their voodoo shit on our apartment.

Fuck that.

~\\~

At some point I remembered falling asleep and waking up in the middle of the night. The alarm clock next to me told said it was just after two o'clock in the morning in too bright red numbers. I looked over and saw that I was alone in bed. When I touched the other side it was cold, the sheets still smooth as if nobody had been there.

Which I guess nobody had been there.

I sat up and ran a hand through my crazy hair. It was way too fucking long and way too out of control right now. I could cut half of it off and it would still be considered long at the length it was at. After grabbing a ponytail from the bedside I put my hair in a messy bun and got out of bed. My crutches had been placed against the wall, and I knew Edward had to have come in here when I was asleep. I grabbed just one of them and stepped out of the room to see where Edward was.

I noticed him immediately sprawled out on the couch with his feet dangling off of the edge. His homework was scattered all over the coffee table and he had one arm laying on the ground with his head turned into the back of the couch with the lamp in the corner still on and the television playing in the background. I carefully sat at the edge of the couch and stacked up his papers before setting them off to the side. I turned off the television and the lamp before I'd gotten to the couch.

When I turned towards him, I reached out to gently run my hand down his cheek and over his jaw.

He leaned into my touch and sighed, shifting his body over.

" Edward, come on, let's go to bed." I whispered, running my fingers through his hair.

That seemed to have roused him because he opened his tired eyes and yawned. His eyes focused on me and he closed them again with a deep sigh.

" Please come to bed."

" Why?"

" Because I don't want to fight with you anymore."

" I'm sorry for being an inconsiderate asshole."

I cracked a smile, " It's okay, we'll talk about it in the morning."

He sat up and dug his palms into his eye sockets. Before I could sit up he wrapped his arms around me and lifted me into his arms, making me squeal loudly in surprise. He looked over at the clock on the wall and smiled down at me, and I knew exactly what he was about to say.

" Happy Birthday, Angel."

**Authors Note- LINK FOR THE APARTMENT ARE IN MY PROFILE, ****READ ALL INSTRUCTIONS**** TO FIND THE RIGHT PICTURES.**

**IMPORTANT NOTE REGARDING THE DELAYED UPDATE AND FAILED TEASER RESPONSE BELOW!**

**So...Any fellow reviewers of mine out there who are writers? Ever have a chapter magically mess itself up, get out of order and delete part of itself? Well, I'm not exactly sure how this happened, but lets just say I've spent a week re-writing a chapter and freaking out about getting it posted in a good timely matter.**

**I'm so sorry about not getting teasers out and not replying, I was just so focused on getting this chapter back...I'm sorry!**

**NEXT**** chapter we get a ****TIME SKIP****. So that will mix things up and make them more interesting, hm? I think we need one.**

**Since I wasn't able to reply to reviews because of this chapter mess, there was only really one question I got that kind of needed an answer I guess!**

**Q-WHY DIDN'T CHARLIE GET A DNA TEST?**

**A- As I said last chapter, once they looked at the pictures of Blake; It was unmistakable. Charlie didn't want to accept it. The reason they didn't do a DNA test? well, they knew she was Blake's, and denying that would be like saying Gwyneth Paltrow wasn't the daughter of Blythe Danner, or Kate Hudson and her mother, get it? They very much look alike to the point where it was just a waste to even bother! Will there be one in the future? We'll see.**

**Next chapter is a WIP because I had to spend so much time fixing this I didn't get to start that...But I will work so hard on it I promise. I will get this story done by the end of summer!**

**If you read this far, put a smiley face in your review to let me know; I might not always reply because crazy shit happens, but I always read them!**


	43. Without You

**Authors Note- Hello everybody. I hope your weekend is off to a good start and enjoy this next chapter!**

**Disclaimer- S. Meyer owns all things Twilight.**

**Chapter Song- Without You by: Keith Urban**

~\\~

EPOV

October 30th

Thursday

~\\~

I paced nervously behind the walls of Juilliard's stage placed in Paul Recital Hall. The Auditorium would seat about three hundred people which included family and faculty, as well as very important, well known, people in the music industry. This includes talent scouts and people who work for theatre's such as Broadway. The reason they primarily show here is because they are interested in talented musicians to take part in their huge, worldwide known plays. They want to find that one person who sticks out among the others; or to even see if anybody is good enough to portray their complex needs.

They always need back-ups in the industry, a musician gets sick or many times more than not they end up settling down to teach in schools. It definitely isn't something unheard of, even if Broadway is a big opportunity. I'd be a lucky son of a bitch to be able to land something such as that, but I never found any interest in that part of the music industry.

I loved the beautiful works of composers such as Mozart, Beethoven, Chopin and Debussy. Primarily Composers in or close to the eighteenth century seemed to always have captured me. I spent hours upon hours at my piano in my times of despair and in times of pure happiness, hoping one day I could be just as good as they could even be. When I was six years old I learned my first full song on piano. It was Chopin's Etude in E major, Op. 10 number three ' Tristesse' - two years after being in many different piano music classes in Chicago but playing since I was three years old.

By the time my finger had hit the last note on that flawless performance my parents and the entire company who owned the music hall had their jaw dropped. My parents and teachers were convinced that I was a prodigy, and from then I'd only pushed myself harder to become just that. Not only because I was good at it, but because piano had been the only escape I had during my parents' divorce if I wasn't hopped up on drugs.

When I was ten I could play Chopin's Waltz in Eb Major ' Grande Valse Brilliante' in movement one.

During ages fourteen and seventeen I found myself leaning on the more depressing works of Beethoven's Pathetique or the even more well known Moonlight Sonata. His early works such as Eroica had been my favorite for as long as I could remember, my mother would play it around the house; any type of classical piano music from the time I was a baby. I grew up with it. It was what I knew. What I loved.

I'd only done three recitals in my time here at Juilliard, they were usually accompanied by other instruments, and only one had been of my own compositions. Somehow I was more nervous this time than last because there wasn't other music playing with me, or another person on the bench beside me as a duet.

More than anything I'd wished for Bella to be here, but unfortunately she was back at the apartment and I smiled thinking of how far she has come in the past few months. Her nineteenth Birthday passed all too quickly as did the rest of the month, and now we were already facing the chilled weather and cold of the upcoming winter; November being only two days away. Or closer to one if being technical.

She was doing extremely well in physical therapy, so well that in about three to four weeks she was going to be able to hopefully be able to get her brace off. About a week ago she had gotten the full cast off that was around her hips and over her thigh, as well as the wrap around her pelvis, which is close to being fully cured after more than four long months of rest and much healing on her part. Now her upper thigh and hip was in a brace and she was able to walk around the apartment without using her crutches.

Her walking was improving, but she still had an ever present limp that the doctors would hope to go away. The joint still had just a few short weeks until it should be okay for her to walk on it without a brace. When the doctors tossed around the idea of her using a cane...Well, my girl laughed her fucking head off and said she'd rather fight through a limp instead of using a cane.

" Edward, two minutes." Mr. Darcey said, patting my shoulder.

I nodded and took a deep breath before stepping into the dressing rooms and looking into a mirror. My suit was tailored, ironed, steamed and whatever the fuck Bella did to it to make it look nice. I had on a black button up underneath it and a black tie. My hair was still out of fucking control after attempting to tame it with gel or hairspray. It ended up being one huge mess that Bella helped me wash out in the kitchen sink five minutes before I had to leave.

Once I heard the final notes of the piece currently playing my name was soon announced afterwards and I stepped out onto the stage and bright lights, trying to stand up tall. The audience was quiet when I sat down, and I knew they probably didn't expect much from a guy this young. Or a guy with piercings I thought with a sneer.

Fuckers.

I laid my fingers on the keys and from then the music started.

These pieces were made to be inspired by other well known classical and jazz piano pieces; it was supposed to be the beat and pattern of the original song with a spin-off of our own taste. I think the professors just wanted to see how badly we could fuck up a song.

I chose Chopin's Revolutionary Etude.

Chopin's inspiration was Russians attack on Warsaw during the Uprising in the early eighteen hundreds, not to give a history lesson, but primarily the song holds an angry note. Whilst played in C minor, I'd added darker notes to it and slowed it in a few places to show more depth.

Some of the song would be set in D minor such as in Moonlight Sonata by Beethoven. Considering this is a recital near Halloween I thought it would set a good, fitting mood for the rest of the crowd. I'd reworked the piece a million times, stressing over it more times than I could explain and a few times considering a different song but Bella made me stick with it.

She'd never heard me play it, but I hoped that maybe one day she could hear it.

I felt a lot of pressure not only with the lights on me, but because this was the last show of the night; meaning people had to leave with a good impression. As well as the fact that if I fucked up one note in this song everybody would know it and that would ruin me.

My fingers played the ivory, gently stroking the keys as my foot steadily moved along the piano pedals expertly. My eyes had just barely glanced at the sheet music I had in front of me, I guessed that was one good thing about working so hard on something; you couldn't forget it even if you tried. I found myself lost in the darker notes and my fingers moving frantically over the higher pitched tones, my body leaning towards the piano in emotion.

The crowd was eerily silent, not one single sound but the ones I made, bouncing off the walls, striking through the dressing rooms behind me and hopefully striking soulfully through everybody in their seats.

I couldn't pinpoint the exact moment I'd finished, but when I heard the loud, roaring applause I snapped out of my trance and stood up, facing the crowd of roughly three hundred people. My heart was racing and I could feel the sweat beading at my temple. After bowing and hearing my name announced once more I left the stage.

My classmates and teacher attacked me with compliments, and a few others stood off to the side with irritated looks on their faces. My teacher applauded me on my use of darker notes and slower tones I'd added into the song, as well as the twisted, sharp ending when it had been finished.

I felt proud of myself in that one moment, I felt recognized and that someone could appreciate something I'd done. I was patted on the back and I went to the dressing room that was full of the guys in my class. One of the students, Liam, walked up to me as I grabbed the keys to Bella's truck and my cell phone.

" Hey, man, you were awesome out there. I think you made all of us look like amateurs."

I shrugged at the compliment, " Everybody was good, honestly. I liked your version of Debussy's Beau Soir, very well played up."

We talked for just about a minute before I headed off, and just as I was walking out of the dressing room I'd literally ran straight into something, or someone.

But not just any someone.

Bella.

" What the hell are you doing here?!" I exclaimed, wrapping my arms around her and tempted to spin her around.

I couldn't believe she was here.

" I wanted to see you perform, you were so bummed about me not making it so I just called a cab. You didn't even see me in the second row! Holy fuck, you were amazing, baby. Everybody was talking about what a 'masterpiece' you created. They were amazed."

I smiled and kissed the top of her head, holding her closely to me. As I did I noticed that she was only using one of her crutches while out; I knew I could have said something but I was so happy about her seeing me play that I didn't even bother.

" I can't believe you surprised me like this."

" I wouldn't miss this for the world, Edward." she whispered, her arms wrapped tightly around my waist.

" Thank you."

She looked up at me, all bright eyed, big smile and all mine. " Don't thank me, it's what I'm here for."

I combed my fingers through her hair, " What did you think about the rest of the show?"

" Not as good as you." she said shortly with a laugh as I led her out towards the front entrance to take her home.

My hand grazed her ass, giving it a slight smack. She bit her lip and looked up at me, playfully glaring at me teasing her. As I turned my head up, an older man who looked to be about in his seventies had stopped in front of me with a smile on his face.

His hair was white, but his eyes were alive and he looked at me almost as if he knew me.

" Edward Masen? You played that absolutely wonderful piece of Chopin's?"

I smiled, " Yes, sir, I did."

" Your talent is astounding; I've rarely come across a student so young with so much amazing talent. You not only can play so beautifully but your emotion is so...raw...I'm absolutely stunned."

" Thank you, sir, that means a lot to me."

" I'm not sure if you are aware, but I am a Executive Director and Event Manager at Carnegie Hall, Robert Hemmingsworth."

I was momentarily stunned as I reached out and shook his hand firmly with mine.

Holy fuck.

Carnegie Hall.

Carnegie fucking Hall.

" We often have senior students here at Juilliard play in smaller recitals sometimes during our on months; I'm sure you are aware. Right now we are filled up but I'm very interested in you, Mr. Masen. You have talent I haven't seen in many years."

I was going to pass out.

" Do you have any original compositions you've written yourself?" he asked me.

" Yeah, definitely.I've been writing compositions since I was ten years old, they've changed but you couldn't possibly be interested- I...I'm just a second year student and I-"

He put his hand up, " I know that this is probably a surprise to you, but there is no possible way I could pass up someone with this type of talent. While I said this year we are packed, and you are only a second year student; I would be very pleased to give you my card Edward. After you graduate I might have some great job opportunities for you in the near future if you are interested."

I took the card from him with shaky hands. " It would be an honor, sir. I will be in contact."

I couldn't believe that this was happening; it was the opportunity of a fucking lifetime. This couldn't be happening and I felt like a teenage girl as I couldn't wait to call my parents to tell them about this. They'd always joked when I was a kid that I would one day play at Carnegie Hall or the Greek Theater and even Hollywood Bowl. And while this wasn't something that I could do next week or next month or next year, this was something I could do after about two years.

As long as he didn't lose interest in me, which I had hoped he wouldn't, this could be my future.

" It was a pleasure meeting you, Mr. Masen; I'll be seeing you."

" Pleasure is all mine, Mr. Hemmingsworth." I replied.

He smiled at me before glancing at Bella, " I'm sorry for interrupting your night, young lady."

I think she was stunned he was talking to her, " It's not a problem, sir. Have a good evening."

We walked away and I found myself only taking one or two steps in front of me before stopping in pure shock of the situation.

" Holy-"

" Fuck." she finished.

" Carnegie Hall. Someone wants ME to play at Carnegie Hall. Oh my god."

Bella put her arms around me, " This is amazing! Esme is going to freak out."

I stood, soaking in the moment, completely dumbfounded by the fact that this just happened to me.

I felt a tug on my hand and Bella smiled up at me.

" You are coming to every single recital I ever have, my beautiful lucky charm." I tell her, ignoring that people look at me as I lift her up into my arms and kiss her on the lips as I walk to the car. Once we get in I drive home with a grin on my face, Bella's hand securely wrapped around mine.

Her fingers squeezed mine every few minutes, and when we got to the apartment it felt like the ride up to the elevator was like I was flying. Bella rolled her eyes at me as I stood in front of the apartment door, not making a move to open it up.

" Okay, superstar. We've got to get into the apartment somehow. My key is on my car keys and you have yours somewhere."

When I felt her hand slide over my ass, grabbing the keys from me and unlocking the door, I struggled not to push her up against it. Her crutch leaned against the hallway and she leaned me against the door as she closed it, running her hands over my waist.

" Want to take a bath?" she asked lowly, pushing her hair over one shoulder to expose her neck.

That immediately brought my thoughts elsewhere and I grabbed her by the waist and lifted her up into my arms as she wrapped hers around my neck to hold onto me. When we got to the bathroom I got out of my suit, standing in my boxers to help Bella get her brace off, holding her up against me as I did. She had it on over a pair of jeans, so it was a little harder to get it off painlessly.

Once we sunk into the bathtub, her lying with her back against my chest with my hands resting on her stomach; I felt any tension in my body release. I probably didn't look manly at all, surrounded by vanilla and rose scented bubbles. The naked girl in front of me seemed to outweigh any doubts of it though

" I'm proud of you." I heard her say, resting one of her hands over mine.

" I'm proud of _you_. Thank you so much for coming to see me play, I know it was probably a lot of effort."

" Worth every minute of it."

I hugged her closely, running my hands over her soft curves underneath the layer of bubbles. Her body shivered slightly despite the hot water, and I felt her push her back closer to my chest; hands roaming over my thighs in a steady upwards and downwards motion.

" My mom called me today...before I left the house." Bella told me.

" Yeah?"

Bella sighed, deeply, " I'm trying; Edward. I don't want our relationship to be non-existent anymore even after all of this. She just keeps apologizing and if I ignore it what does that make me look like?"

" Do whatever makes you happy, Bella. If it makes you feel better than I want you to fix it with your mom, but don't do it because you feel guilty. Do it for you."

She nodded, " I am...Really, I want to do it for me; it's just so hard."

I kissed the side of her head and pulled her close to me, playing with the pieces of hair that fell out of her bun.

" She told me that she talks to him every once in awhile...And he knows now that I know about him."

" Yeah?"

Bella nodded, " Apparently my mom would send him pictures of me...That was up until my parents divorced, she lost the baby and then moved away."

" Did she say if he said anything about you knowing?"

" He said that it was okay if I wanted to contact him...That he knew one day it could happen and he was prepared for it."

Her hands stopped their motions on my legs and I felt one hand reach up to grasp mine in the water.

" She told me that he has a wife...Her name is Heidi. They don't have any children."

" How long have they been married?"

" He never cheated on her with my mom...They married about three years ago, met soon after everything with my mom and fell in love quickly; had a small wedding she said."

I placed another kiss at her temple, " Does this woman know about you?"

" Yes. Apparently she is very interested in me."

" I would be, too."

" My mom said that I was named after Blake's grandmother. I always wondered why my name was so...fru-fru and my parents were just Charlie and Renee."

I chuckled at the way she had put her words, " Fru-fru?"

" Isabella Marie. I can only imagine if my last name was Moretti."

" Your name is beautiful, Isabella." I purred into her ear, making her shiver.

She smiled and started to slowly sit up, " We should get out before we turn into walking raisins."

I quickly got out of the bath to wrap a towel around my waist. I stood in the shower area around the bath and helped Bella out, wrapping a towel around her as she leaned against the counter. After helping her into her pajama's I secured the brace on her leg since it hurt to bend completely over.

She let her hair fall in long, chocolate colored waves down her back that was just about hip length. Bella constantly grumbled about the annoyance of dealing with it, but to me it was sexy. I loved it.

" We're going out tomorrow." she said as she sat on the edge of the bed.

I leaned over on the other side and wrapped my arms around her from behind, burying my face in her strawberry scented curls.

" Okay. Lunch?" I asked, pulling her down onto the mattress.

She smiled, " After the hair salon."

~\\~

BPOV

~\\~

" I can't wait to get this thing off."

Edward pushed my chair in for me and took a seat, grabbing the menu in front of him.

" Soon, baby. Soon."

I touched the ends of my hair before running my fingers through it. Somehow with four inches off it felt lighter, and while I had wanted to take more off; I knew Edward was partial to my long hair.

Never would I have thought I'd see the day where I gave a fuck what someone thought about me. He told me to do what I wanted but I saw a weird look in his eyes as inch by inch was cut off. I liked it this way anyways, even if it was a little longer than what I had wanted. It was healthier and less dull than before; now in lose curly natural waves to my waist; not my hip.

" Ah, fuck; I just want a burger and a slurpee. The closest thing I see on here is a classic steakhouse burger with mushrooms and provolone."

" You want to go to McDonald's and 7-11?"

" Fuck, yeah. And can we go somewhere else after that?"

He already stood before I could finish and I got up and took his arm as we headed out; our waitress looking at us. Edward passed her a ten for inconvenience and opened the door for me to lead me out into the cold air.

~\\~

" I don't know why the hell you continue to do this knowing your future career." Edward laughed, running his finger over the metal bar. " Does it hurt?"

" Not really; and if they don't take me as I am then what's the fun in working at a future place like that anyways?"

He shrugged, " I guess not."

" You don't like it." I stated, pausing to look up at him.

" I think it's adorable."

I reached up to touch the industrial bar, feeling the small balls at the end that were speckled with blue and pink enamel. It was cute and once it would heal in about six months I could go and buy the little heart and arrow one with the small green diamonds.

" Adorable?"

" I think all your piercings are adorable. Like this one." he said, kissing my lip, " And this one." my ears.

I stuck my tongue out at him and pushed his mouth against mine, stroking my tongue with his.

" We should have gotten matching." I said, pulling away slightly before kissing him softly.

" Matching snowflake tongue rings; how cute."

I rolled my eyes, " Have you even changed yours since you got it pierced?"

" Oh a dare I had to get one that had a hello kitty on the underside."

I let out a short laugh; " You totally wouldn't."

" I did. For two months."

He pulled me against his side as I laughed at him, " Cute."

His hand wandered down to squeeze my ass tightly; like he always seemed to enjoy doing in public. I squealed and grabbed onto his arm. As we walked down towards the car I could feel the strain on my hip from walking in and out of places; and Edward could tell I was in pain because he was slightly holding me up on my side so I wasn't putting too much pressure on it.

" Just about as cute as that snow flake."

I smile and stuck my tongue out at him again.

~\\~

I walked across the room as steadily as I could, trying to get past the limp in my step but it was still there; but the pain was gone considerably, and as I stopped and paused I took a deep breath and felt the tears well up in my eyes when I could sort out the realizations.

I was facing one of my big fears; because for so long I was convinced I'd never be able to stand up again; not only in a literal sense but in an emotional sense. I didn't want to fail because of the disappointment that would heavily follow me until I could do it right. After all of the work I'd done it wasn't an option for me at this point; I wasn't going to get myself down anymore though.

I would do this, and I would be able to do it right; but the pressure was on, all eyes were on me as if I were in a circus as the main attraction, the crowd expecting me to do my best when I was afraid to fuck everything up while everybody watched in fascination. Nervousness pricked at my insides, making me feel sick.

Because I never thought I'd even be here again.

Walking.

Breathing.

Alive.

When I turned around I saw Edward looking into my eyes, the most breath-taking smile on his face and I wanted to run into his arms as fast as I possibly could; hold him closely to me and never let him go for as long as I lived. I wanted him to make love to me; show me that even through all of this he still loved me as I was. I wanted to feel his warmth wrapped around me, no bulky casts, braces or a stitch on us. The thought of it made a shiver run down my spine, and as I looked at him my insides started to tingle.

" This is amazing, Bella. Absolutely extraordinary." my Physical Therapist, Jared Call said as he sat in the chair near the bars. " How does it feel?"

" Weird."

He chuckled, " Yes, but how is the pain?" 

I rested my hand over my hip, " A small bit of pain but it's not really a bother. The limp is something I have to focus on though."

" Well, Bella, as the doctor said the limp might never go away even if the pain does; but it's not very prominent unless you pay close attention to how you walk."

" Does this mean I can throw that brace in the garbage?"

" If you mean give it back to us, then yes. I don't see a reason for you to use it. We stretched your leg out just fine without much pain at all and you are walking just fine. As long as you feel confident you'll be alright?"

I nodded, " Yes, I am."

Before I could move Edward lifted me up into his arms and held me tightly, unhinged and unafraid of hurting me for the first time in months.

" Well, I believe Dr. Saxton said she'd like to see you after this session; it was amazing working with you Bella. I wish you well."

I smiled at him, " You, too; thank you for everything. Not just anybody could deal with me."

He rolled his eye and Edward wrapped his arm around my waist once I'd grabbed my bag from the chair in the corner, saying one last goodbye to Dr. Call before heading down the halls. We met up with Dr. Saxton towards the front of the hospital before being led to an exam room.

Earlier on today I had gotten more x-rays before heading to Physical Therapy, which hopefully I thought would be my last day; and I was right.

It was hard to believe that all of the hard work I'd done had paid off.

Through the frustration and pain, I was finally back to normal. Almost. As we walked back to the exam room Dr. Saxton had put my brace on one of the long desks that lined around the nurses' station and we talked about how my last session went as we walked on towards the room.

I hopped onto the desk and she grabbed my file before taking out the x-rays and placing them on the light board that hung on the wall. They lit up and showed my hip bone and joints up close; which compared to when I saw my first x-rays; there was a complete three sixty difference.

It was astounding.

Edward put his hand on my shoulder, leaning against me as he stood.

" Your hip looks to be in almost excellent shape, Bella. The crack that was still prominent in the joint is almost barely even recognizable anymore. As for your femur I am absolutely thrilled to see that it has healed so well including all those muscles that have been built back. Have you been cutting back on the pain pills as I said?"

I nodded, " Yes, over the past month I have. For two weeks I went down to half a pill, then just a quarter and this morning I didn't take anything but just two Tylenol just in case."

Even thought my Physical Therapy sessions were three to four times a week, I only had to see Dr. Saxton just once a month because of the progress I had made. It was nice not to have to be there every two weeks like I had been in Forks.

She nodded, " That's great, and how is the pain level?"

" I could feel just a small amount when I stretched my leg out before starting my sessions; and only just a small twinge when I would take every few steps. Maybe a two on a one to ten, nothing too bothersome."

She wrote something down in my chart and nodded before switching the picture on the board to my pelvis. Last time I had been here it had been about where my hip and femur was; a few cracks that were almost completely invisible as well as a small amount of pain. Now I rarely felt any pain in my pelvic area whatsoever.

I could actually sit up for a long time without anything hurting which was nice. Edward and I were finally able to go out to dinner instead of eat take-out because he refused to let me run around and cook like I wanted to. But now that I heard this news he could finally get off my back.

" How is the pain in your pelvis this month?" she asked before noting on the x-rays.

" Good, very good. I don't feel much pain anymore."

She nodded and was pointing to certain spots, " All these cracks that were here seem to have closed up."

I looked at it and saw a few white streaks through where cracks were that I didn't really notice before. Or even look to notice.

" What are those streaks of white?" I asked, pointing forward.

She looked up at it before glancing back at me, " That is the surgical glue they had to use when your bones had shattered. Of course it didn't immediately heal and fix your bones because they had to bond together and they seemed to have fully done that which is great news."

Edward smiled and kissed my temple, wrapping his arm around my waist. Dr. Saxton turned the lights back on and sat down in her chair, pushing her blonde hair over her shoulder and looking at my chart, writing a few little notes down before her eyes caught ours.

" Now Dr. Call your Physical Therapist said that you do have a limp in your walk; and I was able to notice it a little as you walked. It doesn't look for you to have to require a cane or a walker; but I would like to see you in two weeks for a check-up, and if in a month the limp hasn't gotten any better or if you still feel just a small twinge of pain as you said then I'd like to look a little deeper into this to make sure something else isn't going on."

" Okay, that sounds fine...I really hope it goes away."

She patted my leg, " I have to say though, Bella, if you came out of this with only a limp that is a small price to pay. We're so lucky to have you here."

" A limp isn't the only thing I'm walking away with." I murmured mostly to myself, but Edward had heard me and the doctor; and he kissed my temple once again, peppering my forehead with kisses.

Dr. Saxton gave me a sad smile, " I can't imagine how hard this is on you, Bella. I've seen so many women walk in and out of this place with the same fate as you and it never gets easier; but you have a boyfriend who seems to love you more than anything no matter what. Hold on to that, sweetie."

She was very right. I knew I had Edward with me.

I felt like the luckiest girl on earth just because of that.

" I also do want to let you know since we have been indirectly on the subject; I would refrain from any sexual activity for about another ten days. If during any activity you are feeling pain or discomfort the first few times it is normal for this case. However if the pain feels very sharp as to where it feels extremely painful then I advise you to stop and immediately make an appointment here with me so we can get you checked out."

I bit my lip and nodded, " Alright...Uh, what kind of pain is expected?"

" Most likely a stinging feeling, it could be strong so expect it. I'm sure you are able to remember your first time having intercourse, mostly uncomfortable but not un-manageable. If it is then that is why I advise you to cease activity and call my office."

" Okay. Thank you so much."

" Of course, now I'll see you in about two weeks; you can make an appointment up front and I'll see you then."

She left us in the room, leaving the door open a crack and I jumped down from the exam table, my hand in Edward's as we went to the front desk to make an appointment for two weeks. Afterwards we headed out to the car and went back to the apartment; having already eaten lunch before my session.

When we got inside the apartment Edward had almost immediately enveloped me in his arms, carrying me to the couch as my legs stumbled backwards and I giggled as he pushed me onto the couch still wearing my boots, winter peacoat and my scarf that kept me warm from the cold weather that was rolling in this upcoming winter.

" I can't wait to have you completely wrapped around me without that goddamn brace when we sleep." he growled, laying over me and leaning down close to press his lips heavily into mine. I rested my hands on either side of his face and slanted my lips against his, feeling them part to sample his delicious minty taste.

My hand moved gently over his shoulder and down his side; over his ribcage and sliding around to his lower back.

I felt his thumbs touch the apples of my cheekbones, cradling my head in a way that made me feel so cherished and loved. He pulled away just an inch, kissed me once, twice, three times more before tucking my head underneath his chin and holding me close.

I brought my hands to the buttons of my coat and Edward loosened his hold, tossing his own jacket off. After untying my scarf I kicked off my boots and pressed my cold socked feet against Edward's ankles. He jumped at the cold feeling and chuckled.

" Cold, baby?"

" Yeah, can you fix that?" I asked my voice low and sultry.

He moved closer to me, caging me in his arms and kissing me long and sweet.

~\\~

Once Edward and I could peal our limbs, and lips, away from each other he wanted to take me out on a special dinner tonight after the news of my doctor. We ended up going to Brio's Italian Tuscan Grille enjoying some authentic ravioli for dinner.

" So, I was talking to my dad earlier this week."

I looked up at him, " Yeah? How is he?"

" He asked me if we wanted to stay with him around New Years since my mom would kill me if we weren't in Forks for Christmas. Since everything fell through during the summer because of the accident he wants to see us."

I bit my lip, " Edward, I would love to but I can't...afford flying to Forks, then to Chicago then back here. It's not po-"

" I don't want to hear that; I will be taking care of all those expenses. And I would like to see my dad, so I guess that's settled. I figure we could fly in the twenty ninth, spend the rest of our break with him and come back here."

" You can't do that for me; it's way too much."

" Just say thank you, and I'll lean over to give you a kiss and we'll finish dinner." he said in a teasing voice, squeezing my hand over the table.

I gave him an obviously fake, plastered on smile. " Thank you."

He rolled his eyes at me, " That didn't earn a kiss, sweetheart."

" And that eye roll makes you very undeserving, darling."

Edward leaned forward, his eyes smoldering, " I can't wait to ravish you, Miss. Swan."

" Dream on, Mr. Masen."

**Authors Note-**

**YAY! Bella is hopefully all good to go…**

**I bet you guys are glad to have all this medical stuff out of the woods, and next chapter there are going to be some holiday things going on and what not. As I said, a few small time skips are necessary to keep the flow of the story so I hope that all works with you guys.**

**I will try to get teasers out within the next 4 days, since the next chapter is a WIP I have to work around that! But thank you so much for reading and I love you all so much!**

**REVIEWS get TEASERS!**


	44. Tailgate Blues

**Authors Note- IMPORTANT NOTE AT THE END OF THE CHAPTER! ps. this chapter is mostly filler.**

**Disclaimer- S. Meyer owns all things Twilight.**

**Chapter Song- Tailgate Blues by: Luke Bryan**

~\\~

BPOV

Thursday

November 27th, 2008

Thanksgiving

~\\~

It was a few days after getting my leg brace off and I was settling into being back in a normal routine. I was bored throughout the days but at least now I was able to wander outside the apartment and go around the shops. Some days I would even meet up with Edward for lunch between his classes if he had time.

But it was Thursday, Thanksgiving day and I was running around like crazy. Yesterday Edward started his break and he was off until Tuesday and resuming on Wednesday so he was all mine until then. I honestly couldn't wait until I could start school back up so I could stop going stir fucking crazy in this apartment. It was almost exhausting being this bored at times.

Today was different though, I had a very important meal to make, and while Edward said we could just order pizza; that just wasn't good enough for me. Every year I knew Edward had a home cooked Thanksgiving meal; this year would be no exception.

" Baby, you need to slow down." Edward murmured, coming up behind me with his hands on my hips, lips on my neck.

" I need to finish cutting these potatoes; and I can't do this while you are doing that."

I felt his lips lightly suck on my neck, alternating between licking, biting and sucking. For just a moment I let my body relax back against him. He was pulling me away from the kitchen when I pulled away.

" No, Edward. Not now."

He grumbled and released me. I went back to my task of cutting the potatoes and putting them on the stove in a pot of water in front of the sweet potatoes. I was able to fit our small turkey and the stuffing in the oven together, and the cranberry relish was already chilling in the fridge. I'd gotten up especially early just so I wouldn't have to be doing everything last minute besides the green beans.

At around one I was finally able to take a break and relax. Outside it was snowing lightly, blanketing the city in white. Edward lay across the couch lazily, a blanket laying over his legs as he watched television. I collapsed on top of him and draped my arms around his neck. He wrapped his arms around my waist and kissed the top of my head.

" You don't have to work so hard."

" I want everything to be perfect."

" Being here with you makes it perfect." the way he said it made me look up at him.

I ran my hand over his jaw, " Why do you say it like that?"

" Because I almost lost this. You." he choked out, trying to cover the raise in his voice with a cough.

" I still would have been with you, Edward. I'd never permanently leave you."

He gripped me tightly, " Don't fucking say that."

" Say what?"

" That you still would have been with me. If you were buried into the ground, I'd be burying myself with you."

I shook my head, " Don't say that. Edward, if I died that night I would have wanted you to go on, finish school, be successful and find someone to make you happy. I'd want you to have a wife and beautiful children and all the fucking typical stuff everybody else has."

" Not without you."

Tears pricked my eyes and I sat up slowly, " Either way I can't give you all of that...I can't give you a family."

" That doesn't matter to me. I have you, and as long as I have you that is more than good enough for me. I'd rather have you and not have a family then not have you at all."

" Why the fuck are we talking about this?"

" I don't know. It's the holiday's, aren't we supposed to be having fun and buying shit we don't even need."

I laughed and he tickled my sides before turning me over onto my back and peppering my neck with his lips as he continued his ministrations.

I screamed his name and tried to move my body away, and he laughed against my neck as he held me down; attacking me relentlessly. My arm was trapped underneath my body but I wormed it out from underneath me and went to jab at his rib when he grabbed my hand with the one he used to tickle me with.

" Edward! Stop, stop!" I gasped, wiggling around as he used one hand to bind my wrists with his long fingers, switching hands as he dug one left one into my side.

" Stop screaming my name so loud it'll give our neighbors the wrong idea!"

I decided to take a note from the book of seduction and I leaned forward, trying not to jerk. He slowed his hand as I touched my lips to his, then gently took his bottom lip between my teeth and pulled. He paused and I took that chance to push against his shoulders and he fell on his back against the couch.

" Not so strong are you?" I teased, clenching his wrists in my hands on either side of his body as I straddled him.

" Bella, I could lift my hands up right now, but I don't want to hurt your feelings because you are under the impression you are strong."

" Fuck you!" I laughed releasing his hands and shoving his shoulders into the couch.

Playfulness gleamed in his eyes and he rested one of his fingers on my lip.

" Such language!"

" Shut up."

Just as he had wrapped his arms around my waist, my phone started ringing from its spot on the coffee table. I leaned over and answered it without bothering to check the Caller ID.

It was my mother.

" Bella! Happy Thanksgiving, honey. Are you in Forks right now?"

" No. I'm in New York with Edward."

" Oh, alright."

She fell silent and I rested my hand on Edward's chest, tracing invisible patterns.

" Is there a reason for this call besides holiday purposes?"

A long sigh sounded from the phone, " Bella, I don't want this battle to last for years on end. This is ridiculous."

I laughed, " Ridiculous? You want to tell me about ridiculous? Maybe if you would have been honest with me things would be different."

" From the sounds of it over the past months your father isn't getting this type of treatment."

" Maybe that's because he didn't fucking cheat in the first place, and he didn't tell his daughter he was moving to Phoenix when in reality he was in Seattle, talking to his daughter every night listening while she cried that she missed him. Dad did shitty things to me, he hurt me, he's hit me but somehow none of that sticks out after hearing the fact that YOU were that cold to do that to a little girl."

She gasped, " He's hit you?!"

Fuck.

" Isabella?!"

I went to move off of Edward but he held me there and grabbed my hand.

" Forget I said any of that, but remember everything you did to me. Think about how that made me feel even though I still loved you. And if you would have told me the night of everything; things would have been incredibly different, mom. Happy Thanksgiving."

I hung up the phone and ran my hand over my face.

" I thought things were getting better."

" They're not."

He rubbed my back soothingly, " It'll be okay."

I shook my head and hoisted up, kissing the top of Edward's hand.

" Don't go."

" I want to get dressed." I said shortly, " I'm cold."

I slipped off my shirt as I walked into the bedroom and stripped off my bra and the rest of the clothing I wore before putting on some fresh clothes. After putting on a tight fitting black long sleeved shirt and a pair of medium/dark wash skinny jeans I went to the bathroom and put my hair up so I could wash my face and put on makeup.

I smudged brown shadow into my eyes to make them smoky and lined them with black eyeliner onto the top and bottom before finishing with mascara and chap-stick. My hair was a curly mess so I smoothed all the tangles out and was able to give it some extra glossy curls on the bottom so I wouldn't have to bother with a straightener

Edward came into the bathroom, the bra I had previously been wearing hanging from his finger by the strap. It was just a simple black padded bra with red bows all over it.

" You're such a tease." he laughed, dropping it to the floor.

He bent down and lifted me up around my waist and nuzzled my neck.

" I'm really not in the mood for this, Edward." I sighed

" Don't let all of this ruin our first Thanksgiving together."

I sighed as he set me down on my feet. He was right, I didn't want to let my mother ruin anything but at the same time I hated that I was stuck in this whole limbo with her. We had never been at odds before and even though she'd apologized; it just wasn't enough for something like this. It just...wasn't.

Edward twisted a curl with his thin finger and I turned around and wrapped my arms around him tightly. Once his arms were around me I felt safe and warm...and even more importantly; loved. I buried my face in his shirt, breathing in his scent and I didn't want to move from this spot. His hands rubbed my back soothingly, massaging the lower muscles slowly.

" You're right. I know you are." I sighed, sinking into him.

" Of course. Now...let's go taste test that stuffing..."

~\\~

I looked at the small square package that was laying at the bottom of my purse; which precisely had not been used very much at all in the past few months for obvious reasons. I reached inside and grabbed it before sliding out the pack of small, sealed pills.

Fucking birth control.

Out of a burst of anger I tossed them across the room and put my purse on the ground.

All day I'd been going absolutely insane.

It was Tuesday.

Precisely the day I was given the go ahead to be able to have sex again.

If it weren't for the fact that things had so drastically changed; I would have jumped at this. Literally. Before the accident Edward and I had a pretty big sexual appetite I guess one could say. We weren't the boring once or maybe twice if we were lucky kind of couple. Nope.

And while I knew that tonight Edward wouldn't pressure me to do anything; I felt the pressure on myself to. I wanted to get back to normal, and there were times where I didn't feel that empty feeling on the inside; but there were the little reminders that struck me.

Seeing little children running around in excitement and hearing them yell the words 'mommy' knowing I wouldn't have that. And the other day in the grocery store when a little four year old girl had strayed from her mom, Edward had immediately wiped her tears and took her hand; promising to find her mom.

I saw how good he was with children and couldn't help but feel incredibly inadequate compared to other women. It was like when guys got snipped and said that it made them feel less manly. I guess that was how I felt; less womanly. It wasn't as if I'd ever been a real girly girl, and when I was younger I'd always said I never wanted kids because I'd fuck them up.

Now the thought of not having them made my heart ache in places I never even knew existed. I held in a deep breath to stop myself from letting the bile in my throat rise. Standing, I stepped out into the cold, dark winter air and took a seat in one of the chairs. It was freezing outside, and snow was already laying on the ground but I couldn't find it in myself to actually care.

I dug into my loose skinnies and grabbed my cigarettes, lighting one up in the cold. I inhaled deeply.

It was a constant knot in my gut, tied with uncertainty and lust. I let out a long breath and looked at the screen of my phone; telling me Edward would be home very soon, at any minute possible.

He would walk in to find a warm pot of beef and vegetable stew on the stove that was lightly simmering. The television wouldn't be on but the laptop laying on the couch would be; as well as the bedroom lamp. And he would clearly see what I'd thrown on the ground laying there before finding me here. Or maybe he'd see both.

Like clockwork I heard a loud door slam and my name being called. I let out another puff of smoke and counted down from ten.

Ten.

I could hear him take off the lid of the stew on the stove before setting it down.

Seven.

The loud thud of his messenger bag as it hit the floor, steps walking further and further away from me.

Five.

The steps slowly then came closer and closer towards the door.

Three.

It opened and it was almost as if I knew he was bending down to pick them up. I shut my eyes tightly and took another long drag from my cigarette.

One.

" Bella? What the fuck, it's freezing out here! Are you insane?" Edward asked, wrapping a blanket that laid at the end of the bed around me tightly.

" It's not that bad."

" It's only twenty nine degree's out here."

I shrugged and stubbed my cigarette into the ash tray we kept out here before leaning back and looking at the distant tall buildings; all the lights. It was really beautiful, we had a fantastic view and I loved seeing all of the big buildings around me.

He tossed the pills that had previously been on the floor on the table and I sighed and looked away from them.

" I think maybe you should talk to someone."

My head snapped up, " Why in the hell would I do that?"

" Because of everything with your parents and the accident."

" I'm fine."

" Depending on the day, but then I come home and suddenly you throw a tantrum or you get so angry. It's not good for you and neither is it good for our relationship."

I held the corner of the blanket, " Edward it's not like I'm ignoring you or letting it affect our relationship; you know I love you."

" Then what is it? Am I not here enough for you? Do I not tell you enough that I'm okay that we can't have children? That I love you no matter what? Am I not open enough for you to talk to me about your parents or anything else? Fuck, just tell me because you know I'd do anything to make it better. If you need me around more I can adjust my classes around so-"

" No, Edward. I just need to get out more, okay? Once school starts it'll help me get my mind off of things and focus more I think. I don't want to talk to a stranger; the thought of it terrifies me."

He picked up the pack of birth control, " Then what should I do?"

" Edward, I do-"

Without letting me say another word he tossed it over the balcony of the tall building and sat in the chair across from me, our knee's touching and our cold breath mingling closely in the air. He grasped my hands.

" I want you forever. Always mine until the day I fucking die. Nothing will change that, even if you had an amputated leg and only five fingers total. Even if you were fucking bald, losing your hair or your teeth were falling out; I'd still love you just the same. You're my Bella, and you will always be my Bella. Nobody and nothing will change that; unless you find someone more appealing than me."

I laughed, teary-eyed and chattering teeth before leaning forward and wrapping my arms around him, the blanket around me falling loosely around my hips. Afterwards we went inside and I sat down at the table as he ate dinner, then curling up in his lap while we watched television in the living room area. He didn't seem very much in the mood for releasing me so I laid with my head on his chest as he twisted his fingers through my hair.

" No homework to do tonight?"

" No, I was in the practice rooms for about an hour after class and worked a little bit on other things so I could come home and just be with you."

" How sweet."

He glared down at me, " Sarcasm, huh?

I leaned forward and pecked his lips softly, " You know it."

All of a sudden heavy, labored breathing noises filled the room and my eyes snapped to the re-run episode of True Blood, episode six. On the screen I could see Bill and Sookie peeling off each others clothing as they lay in front of a large, burning fireplace.

" It's so typical." I said, glancing at Edward.

" That's not one of your fantasies?" he asked, kissing underneath my ear.

I shook my head, " Not even."

" I thought every girl had that, 'sex in front of a fireplace' fantasy. It's like guys and the typical 'school girl' fantasy."

" You have a school girl fantasy?"

" Every guy does. At least, every guy who isn't gay."

I bit my lip, smiling through it before laying my head down on his chest once more. He wrapped his right arm around me and turned over to lie on his side, pulling me closer and connecting our lips, lightly biting on my bottom one before licking it and drawing it into his mouth, caressing down my back until he reached my backside.

He rolled over to rest on top of me, resting some of his weight on me as our mouths fused together. I brought my arms up to wrap around his neck, everything around us melting away slowly as our passion grew. The television was no more than a low noise in the background.

I felt Edward slowly rock his body against mine, and I arched my back to get closer to him. One of his hands gripped my back to lift me up and he laid back against the other arm of the couch near where it extended out; pulling me into his lap and giving me the control. My knees were on either side of his hips, bracing myself.

" Christ, Bella." he groaned, applying pressure to the back of my head to keep our lips together.

Moments later I felt his hands hooking underneath the back of my knees, lifting me up into his arms. I complied and tightened my arms around his neck, my legs around his waist. I let out a breathy gasp when he pulled his lips from mine to kiss my neck.

I felt my ass hit the mattress and his hands slowly let my legs down, but my arms never wavered from its hold around his neck. Since he was leaning for too long, lost somewhere between kissing my neck and lips, I pulled him down onto the bed, taking control until we found ourselves rolling around in the sheets battling for dominance until Edward was on top of me, his body heavier than mine.

" You okay?" he asked between deep, longing kisses.

" Yes."

Edward slowly started to place kisses up to my ear, and I let out a quiet moan before I heard him speak.

" I'll be slow." he whispered gently, moving a hand to where I had my arms locked around his neck.

Once he loosened my arms I felt his fingers thread through mine, pressing into the mattress next to my head.

" I trust you."

~\\~

The night was one of tangled limbs, silvery colored moonlight streaming in through the glass paneled walls onto slowly moving, sweat covered bodies lying on the large bed. No curtains were drawn, the stars in the sky basking in with the moon.

Movements were slow, deep and gentle, awakening months and months of desperation held in; the ache to subside and fulfilled with its need. Honest love was poured into every touch of a finger, every smooth roll of a body against another that would sound quiet moans to fill the space around.

It was romantic. Both giving and taking equally. Hands linked together, pressed into the thick comforter and warm sheets that were rustled and shuffled around on the bed. When the sun had just cracked slightly at dawn had the movements slowed until they ceased; quiet breaths filling the air.

I rested my head on a warm, bare chest as a blanket tucked around my bottom, leaving my back exposed to the air. A strong arm wrapped around my back, my chest pressing against the side of a solid body.

Edward's lips pressed against my forehead before I felt his forehead against the top of my head, head bowed towards me as he drifted into a deep, restful sleep.

~\\~

A loud blaring alarm woke me up just few hours later, and I knew there was no possible way we'd even gotten three hours of sleep.

Edward reached his long arm over me and slammed his hand onto the contraption before drawing his arm back to wrap tightly around me, burying his face in my neck.

" No school today." he sighed deeply, turning his body to lay on his side facing me.

The comforter rested dangerously low on his hips, the deep 'V' framing the dusting of bronze hair from his navel that disappeared underneath the blanket.

" You serious?"

A smile spread across his face and just a small peek of his green eyes opened.

" Why would I possibly want to leave this? Fuck no." he said with a tired chuckle.

I buried my face in his chest, kissing above his heart as two arms securely wrapped around me; helping me fall into a deep, hopefully non-interrupted sleep.

Later on Edward had snuck out of bed and came back with blueberry scones and coffee from star bucks. The aroma of the deep, rich coffee attacked my senses and almost immediately I had woken up. He stood at the side of the bed in a pair of skinny jeans and a v-neck white t-shirt.

He set the coffee and scone down on the end table and sat on the side of the bed as I sat up, running my fingers through my hair. His hands rested on either side of my face and he kissed me deeply, drawing me into his arms. The sheet that covered me started to slip and I held it up with my one hand, using my other free arm to wrap around his neck.

" Do you need any tylenol?"

" No, I'm okay."

He grabbed the shirt he'd worn yesterday that laid on the floor, which was a FYS band tee. I put it on and it fell to mid-thigh on me.

I reached over and took a long drink of the White Chocolate Peppermint Latte. It was like Christmas in a cup, that's what Edward liked to refer to it as after I forced him to try it.

" So next week is the end of the semester. Are you excited?"

He nodded, " Yeah. We've been working hard in composition class, we're having another show the day before school is over. It's going to be a Christmas extravaganza."

I smiled and took a bite from the scone. " Extravaganza, huh?"

Edward took the food out of my hand and smiled with a mischievous look in his eyes.

" Yes, and you'll be there?"

I nodded, " Yes, of course. I wouldn't miss it for anything."

He bounced onto the bed beside me and I rested against his side.

" So...everything was okay last night?"

I rolled my eyes, " Yes, Edward, for the second time I am absolutely fine."

" Let's get through this next week of finals and THEN we'll see how _fine_ things are."

With a smile I kissed his lips quickly, " After all of this everything will finally be back to normal."

He buried his face in my neck and placed a warm kiss near my collarbone.

" Normal...What a concept!"

**Authors Note- READ EVERYTHING BELOW.**

**Enjoy this teaser and MAKE SURE to read the note after this**

**-CHAPTER 45 TEASER-**

_Finally when another song stopped and another started, Edward stopped in the middle of the dance floor and I leaned against him, smiling and breathing heavily. He leaned forward and placed a kiss to my lips that lasted longer than was appropriate._

_" I told you that you could dance, baby." he said._

_I laughed and rested my head against his shoulder. As he was pulling me to walk away I caught the eye of someone who was looking at me and my entire body froze when I turned. Edward paused and gave my hand a squeeze that I vaguely felt._

_Across from the room stood a decently tall man with dark brown hair and brown eyes. I had seen a smile on his face that had slightly fallen from when I looked at him to meet his gaze; but I knew that smile. I could see it in the mirror every once in awhile._

_When I looked at myself._

_His pale skin was the tone that I knew. The color of his eyes the same ones I'd see everyday. _

_" Bella, what is it, love?"_

_Time stopped._

_" It's my father._

_**I have a little proposition for you guys, something that I haven't done in forever in a half!**_

_**We are at 622 reviews right now and I am so happy for all of that! Thank you guys so much!**_

_**But as you can see next chapter is going to be something else…This story is favorite by 200 of you lovely readers, and I am asking for us to reach 700 reviews for this chapter and I WILL UPDATE THIS AGAIN ON FRIDAY AFTERNOON, rather than next Thursday/Friday of NEXT WEEK. So I am basically asking for less than half of you to review, which I think is fairly reasonable! ALL REVIEWS WILL BE REPLIED TO when I see them in my inbox immediately and I would really like to hit this little milestone in my story.**_

_**So, if I REACH 700 REVIEWS BY FRIDAY AFTERNOON I WILL POST THE NEXT CHAPTER THIS FRIDAY AFTERNOON INSTEAD OF A WEEK FROM THIS FRIDAY.**_

_**ALL REVIEWS WILL BE REPLIED TO ALMOST IMMEDIATELY!**_

_**I love you guys, and I would really love to hit 700 reviews!**_


	45. Beginning to Look Alot Like Christmas

**Authors Note- READ END NOTES!**

**Disclaimer- S. Meyer owns all things Twilight.**

**Chapter Song- It's Beginning To Look Alot Like Christmas: Michael Buble Version**

~\\~

BPOV

December 22nd

Monday

~\\~

" EDWARD! WHERE IN THE HELL IS MY PHONE CHARGER!" I yelled from the bedroom as I looked through all of the drawers on either side of the bed.

" You left it plugged into the kitchen outlet!" he shouted back.

I fast-walked to the kitchen, thanking him as I unplugged it and rolled it up before going back to the bedroom and stuffing it into my bag. It seemed as if last minute I was running around feeling like I was forgetting basically everything I thought I would need. Edward was putting his laptop into his bag and making sure to turn things off out there.

Our flight was in an hour and we had to get up at the crack of dawn but ended up waking up a half hour late. So we literally got out of bed and showered immediately, opting to save time and shower together but alas, I wasn't as fun as I wished it could have been. Edward didn't even have time to shave so he was sporting some sexy scruff; it wasn't all bad…

I was wearing one of Edward's Rise Against t-shirts, a pair of tight skinny jeans, some red high-top chucks and now shrugging into a leather jacket. My hair was damp from the shower and I only had time for a little eyeliner and mascara.

" Babe, are you ready? The taxi is downstairs!"

I zipped my carry-on bag and grabbed my suitcase. As I walked out into the living room Edward was near the door with his bag, raising an eyebrow at my attire.

" Bella, it's freezing outside."

" Can we just get out of here?"

He smirked at me and grabbed my suitcase from me before shuffling me outside the door and letting it slam closed behind us.

~\\~

" Bella! Oh, sweetheart I am so happy to see you! Look at you!" Esme exclaimed as she wrapped her arms around me tightly. I hugged her back, genuinely happy to see her because I really did miss the Cullen's.

When her eyes landed on Edward, they went even softer if it were possible and she hugged him tightly, her 'my boy' chants starting. I smiled and felt Carlisle give me a light hug from the side. It was a little awkward, but I could feel the sentiment behind it.

" You look great, Bella. It's such a relief to see you walking again."

" Thank you, and it's nice to be able to."

We headed over to baggage claim and got all of our things before heading out to get into Carlisle's Mercedes. Esme chatted on and on with a huge smile on her face, and Edward had his arm wrapped around me; listening to his mom intently with a smile.

It was now a little bit past four thirty and after the six hour flight and three hour time jump I wished that I could pass out because it was exhausting being on a plane awake for six hours; especially because Edward and I got to bed super fucking late because we thought it was a good idea to pack last minute. So on top of not being able to sleep on the plane, I was ready for a nap.

But not until after eating the Enchilada's that were apparently cooking in the oven at their home. I was convinced that Emmett would probably have eaten them all before we would arrive; he eats basically everything in sight. Unfortunately the wicked witch of the northwest was there as well, and it was always a joy to be acquainted with Rosalie.

The moment I stepped in the Cullen's house I literally felt like I was in a Christmas Wonderland. The table in the center of the foyer did not hold flowers, but a cute little Christmas tree with a gold star on it. There were green, white, gold and red ornaments on them with swirled glitter on them for decoration and small white lights. Honestly, it was gorgeous and cute at the same time.

Garland was weaved through the staircase balcony going all the way along the rest of it on the top floor, colored lights strung through it. As we went to the kitchen I saw their actual full sized Christmas tree in the living room.

And it was fucking huge.

There had to be at least two hundred ornaments on it because no small branch didn't have something attached to it. On top of the tree was a small angel with a gold and cream dress on. It looked very vintage, nothing new, which was a nice added touch. The lights were a mix of white and colored and it looked very homely. Above the fireplace there was garland and lights behind the hooks that held the stockings, and I saw all of them hanging perfectly. They looked like they had been hand sewn and mostly likely done by Esme.

As my eyes looked across them I noticed my name next to Edward before Alice's. It was a stocking with white felt on the back and a mixture of white, green and red on the front. It was very cute with a reindeer and a snowman on the front with a tall Christmas tree and I was astounded by the small little beaded details. Edward seemed to notice what I had and his arm wrapped around me.

" Do you like it? When I was younger and my dad first married Esme I made these for the family because we all had store bought ones! And I figured since you're basically part of the family I'd make one for you."

I smiled at Alice, " It's beautiful, Alice. Thank you so much, it means a lot to me."

She bounced forward and gave me a hug I eagerly returned, feeling warm on the inside and more welcome if that were even possible.

" Oh, I knew Bella Swan had a soft spot in there somewhere." Alice laughed, releasing me and giving Edward a welcome home hug.

" When is your flight to Chicago?" Alice asked.

" Trying to get rid of us already, I see how it is."

She rolled her eyes.

" The twenty ninth around the afternoon. So we get about a week here and a week there."

" Are you done with all your doctor's appointments?" Esme asked as she entered the room, handing me a steaming cup of hot cocoa.

" Yes. I had my last one just a few weeks ago. My limp is gone luckily and that was what she was worried about mostly."

I was just about to sit when all of a sudden I heard a loud, booming voice yell " Bells!"

Now, I'd never actually spent a lot of time with Emmett, but when I lived here over the summer and after that talk we had on the cliffs I guess it made us closer. He really is like the big brother I never had, and even though he was dating a total bitch; I couldn't hold it against him.

My cocoa almost ended up all over me, but Edward grabbed it from me as Emmett lifted me up into a huge, bear hug.

" Looks who's walking again! How's it going limpy?"

" Pretty non-limpy these days." I laughed, " You?"

" Eh, school, more school, lame shit; you know."

Esme glared at him for his language and he gave a bashful smile as Edward handed me my drink. He hugged me once more before grabbing Edward in a headlock, despite Edward being taller, and ruffled his hair until it was even more of a mess than before. Edward shoved him off and scowled as he ran his fingers through it to attempt to tame the bronze locks once more.

" You desperately need a haircut, sweetheart." Esme chuckled.

" I like his messy hair. It sticks up everywhere." I said, reaching up to touch the silkiness.

Instead he took my hand and rested it on his chest, leaning forward to kiss my lips lightly.

" Oh my goodness, what is that?!" Esme asked as she looked at my ear.

I furrowed my eyebrows and lifted my hand up; realizing she had noticed my newest piercing which was my industrial bar. I absolutely loved it and I was finally able to change out the bars to put new ones in.

" Oh, I got an industrial bar! Cool, right?"

" Isabella, I think you are beautiful the way you are."

I poked Edward in the ribs, " Well he got a conch piercing last week when I went to get cleaning solution."

" Edward Anthony!"

" It's not a big deal mom. I was going to get another lip piercing but Bella talked me out of it."

" Kids these days..."

I felt Emmett flick my ear with his finger, " I think it looks cool, ma. What if I got one?"

" Emmett, I'm sure Rosalie will kill you."

He shrugged, " I guess. I just don't pull of teenage emo angst as good as Bella and Edward I guess."

" I'm twenty, jackass!"

" Whatever, same thing."

I sat down on the couch with a laugh and Edward sat next to me, draping his arm over the back of the couch. He rested his hand on my leg soothingly, hand gently clenching around my knee.

" Where's my hot cup of cocoa, mom?" Edward teased as I took a sip of my drink.

" Well, I made it in the cocoa machine and Jasper, Alice and Emmett seemed to have thoroughly enjoyed it while we were gone."

Edward pouted and I handed Edward my half finished cup of the cocoa.

" Finish this for me I want to go to the bathroom."

He took it from me and I made my way to the downstairs bathroom. I flushed some cold water over my cheeks and washed my hands; not enjoying the feeling of being in the plane for hours. Even though we would fly first or second class I still felt a little grimy. Having to use the bathrooms alone made me feel gross. Who knew what the fuck happened on those after people ate those little ice-cream sundae cups they served.

I used the washroom very quickly and then went back out to join Esme and Edward, but noticed that Edward was instead in the hallway trying to lug all three suitcases as well as my carry-on in his arms. I shuffled down the hall and took my carry-on and a suitcase from him.

" Silly man." I laughed, making my way up the stairs. He playfully smacked my ass and I bit my lip and picked up the pace.

When we got to his bedroom I set all of our things on the floor. I noticed that one of Edward's end tables had a little mini light up tree and there were colorful lights beautifully strung around the wrought iron that was designed above the bed.

" Awesome. Christmas threw up in my room."

I smiled and sat down on his lounger, running my hand over the black and white plush blanket.

" Everytime I look at that thing I think of when I first kissed you."

" Almost two years ago."

He sat at the edge of his bed and looked around, " You have no idea how much I hated the thought of moving away from Chicago, but it was the best thing that ever happened to me."

Tears welled up in my eyes and I tried to fight them, not wanting to be such a girl and get over-emotional by what he was saying to me.

" Don't say shit like that it makes me want to cry."

Edward laughed and I stood, running my hand through his hair before grabbing my carry-on bag. I pulled my cell phone out and switched it on, setting it near the small Christmas tree on his end table.

" Is it okay that I stay in here with you while we're here?" I asked Edward as I plugged in my phone charger.

He gave me a funny look, " Yeah, why?"

" I just don't want Esme to feel uncomfortable with it."

" Bella, you slept naked in my bed during prom before you even turned eighteen with my mother down the hall most likely aware of what was going on in here; I'm sure us sleeping together in here is no problem."

I blushed.

Like a fucking school girl.

Edward laughed loudly and got up from his spot on the bed. " Are you blushing? Is Isabella Swan actually embarrassed about something?!"

" Shut up!"

I tossed a pillow at him, which completely missed him and landed on the floor next to his foot.

" Does the thought of my mom knowing about our sex life make you feel uncomfortable?"

My face heated more and I cursed myself, " Stop it!"

" Jesus Christ, you're more red than a fucking cherry."

I shoved my hands against his chest as he tried to grab onto me.

" You're such an ass!"

He laughed and I pushed him onto the bed, " Someone is feisty tonight."

" I'm going to see if dinner is ready."

Edward chuckled the entire time as I walked out, and I could still hear him in the hallway. When I got downstairs I saw Esme in the kitchen taking food out of the oven and there was nobody around so I wondered if she needed any help with anything.

" Hello, dear, were you thirsty? Need anything?"

I shook my head, " No, just checking on dinner; I'm absolutely fucking starving...Shit, sorry for swearing...Godda- Okay, never mind. Sorry."

She shook her head at me, " You've seemed to have forgotten I've got a son with the worst potty mouth, don't stress yourself, dear."

I laughed nervously, " This is true. Do you need help with anything?"

" Well, I have a salad and some vinaigrette and Italian dressings, could you set that on the table, dear?"

" Yup!"

I opened up the large fridge and started to pull what she said out.

" So how has school been doing, hm? Edward said you were having some trouble adjusting to being in the apartment all the time."

" Yeah, I'm not really good with the whole resting and staying still thing. It's been really hard."

She nodded, " I can only imagine. We all know what an independent person you are."

" I'm just glad that I can start applying for jobs and actually go to my classes. The online thing was alright but I definitely miss being in an actual class. It's been amazing to have the time to see Edward perform though, he's absolutely amazing. Everybody loves him."

Esme smiled, " I know! I couldn't believe it when he told me about that man who stopped him to talk about a future at Carnegie. I couldn't imagine my boy being so far away from me but this is something he's always dreamed of."

" It is, he's been doing so great balancing school and taking care of me. I don't think I could ever repay him for that."

" Sweetie, he loves you; it's not something to pay back for. When you love someone you promise to do those things."

I shrugged, " I thought that went along in marriage; in sickness and in health." I noted with a laugh.

A look was in Esme's eye that I couldn't place, and it almost looked mischievous but I didn't say anything.

" So, did Edward tell you that we are going to be going out to dinner and dancing for Christmas Eve?"

" No, actually he didn't. Figures, that boy can't think beyond tomorrow some days!"

" That's him, always living in the moment."

We finished setting dinner up and called for everybody to come up to eat. Apparently Rosalie had left just a little bit before dinner; and I was kind of happy not to have seen her, and Esme didn't seem upset over the fact that she was gone when Emmett informed her.

" It's so nice to have all of you here." Esme said just as I had taken a seat, setting Edward's drink in front of him.

Alice rolled her eyes and Edward leaned over to thank me, kissing my cheek softly.

" These enchilada's are amazing, Mrs. Cullen." Jasper commented.

She gave him a look, " I'm sure you can call me Esme by now, and thank you Jasper. After dinner I have turtle brownies waiting to be eaten."

" I have a feeling we'll be going off to Chicago with an extra ten pounds." Edward teased.

I laughed and took a large bite of the enchiladas, which were fucking amazing as expected.

After dinner we all indulged in Esme's brownies, and then hung out in the living room to watch a few movies on Stars and HBO. Edward and I were exhausted from the flight so we headed up early after wishing everybody goodnight.

I didn't even remember anything past brushing my teeth. I literally threw my jeans, shirt and socks on the floor and got into bed despite the cold air in the room. The glass seemed to radiate cold air despite the heat being on in the house.

Edward climbed in next to me, fucking warm as hell, so when he wrapped his arms around me I sunk into him.

" Want a t-shirt?'

" No." I sighed, " Just you."

~\\~

December 24th

~\\~

" Why can't we open just one gift today?" Emmett whined.

" Don't act like a baby. Christmas is tomorrow, Emmett!" Esme replied.

I rolled my eyes and took a sip of my peppermint white chocolate coffee. It seemed like Edward told her my favorite flavor of coffee and she insisted on making it for me all homemade. It was pretty delicious, and even better curled up on the couch with a blanket next to Edward.

Of course still in my pajamas.

Alice came downstairs in a pair of silky pajama bottoms and a huge robe covering her with a pair of obnoxious cookie monster slippers. It was extremely comical if I did say so myself. She walked past and went into the kitchen from what I could see.

" Dad!" Emmett shouted as Carlisle walked into the room, dressed in a pair of dark jeans, a button up and a long thin sweater over it, holding a cup of coffee in one hand.

" Jesus Christ, son. You'll give someone a heart attack from how loud you talk one day."

Emmett rolled his eyes, " Yeah, whatever. Can I open just one gift today?! Please?!"

" What did Esme say?"

" She said no." Esme replied, walking into the room and taking a seat next to Carlisle.

I could see the pout forming and it was honestly fucking hilarious to see a grown man pout. Edward looked at him and rolled his eyes.

" Really, Emmett? Pouting?"

" Shut up, Edward!"

" Mooom, Emmett told me to shut up." Edward said in a joking, little kid tone.

She rolled her eyes, " Knock it off, boys."

" Boy? I'm a man!"

Edward bit my earlobe gently, " What a contradiction."

Emmett's head snapped it our direction and he pointed an accusing finger towards Edward.

" I don't know what you said, but it probably wasn't very nice."

" What're you going to do about it?"

" I'm gonna-"

" Alright, knock it off you two. It's really annoying." Alice said, walking into the room and sitting at the end of the couch Edward and I sat on.

The television flipped on and it turned to Elf. Esme went to switch it but Emmett was quick and grabbed the remote, so ultimately everybody was going to be forced to watch it. I didn't mind.

Best fucking Christmas movie ever.

Right after a Christmas Story of course, nothing could ever beat that classic. From what I could remember since I was a kid my parents and I would sit and watch that movie for hours and hours during the marathon they had going through Christmas Eve night to Christmas night. No matter how many times I'd seen it I still loved the movie to death and nothing could change that.

I briefly wondered if the Cullen's watched it during the marathon, but then again they seemed almost formal about the holiday.

Dinner and dancing, something I definitely was not used to hearing of.

My parents and I would sit in the living room and eat dinner, enjoying good home-cooked meals and the first seven o'clock playing of a Christmas Story.

After my parents divorced and Sue came into the picture it seemed like I wasn't a part of the holiday's in my house anymore. While Leah, Jake and Seth got a whole bunch of gifts I usually got a hundred dollar visa card; which was nice but made me feel extremely left out; which was why on Christmas mornings I'd lay in bed waiting for the morning to be over most of the time.

And last year I spent it alone, so this year I was just happy to be with Edward and the Cullen's.

It felt like home to me, for the first time in a long time I felt like I was at home.

" What are you thinking about?" Edward asked fingering the hem of his shirt that I wore.

" I'm just happy to be here with you right now; really happy."

His smile was breathtaking, " Good, I want you to be happy."

I gave him a brief kiss and rested my head against his chest.

" So, where are we going tonight?"

" Palisades, since you guys seem to enjoy seafood we figured it would be nice to treat you to some good food, and of course, dancing. Our reservations are at seven, it's a little later but we have little appetizers to snack on during the day."

Everybody nodded and Emmett patted his stomach, " Man, I can't wait to eat all these appetizers you speak of."

" Oh, Emmett, you never change."

~\\~

The day went on almost too quickly. Rosalie was here after Emmett spent a few hours at her house with her family, as well as Jasper. Their parents were apparently going to be joining us at dinner which was nice; I didn't know them but I was dreading meeting Rosalie's parents.

I would only imagine how they acted compared to how they taught their daughter to act.

We hung around the house and ate all the little appetizers Esme prepared, such as stuffed mushrooms, mini quiche, egg rolls, coconut shrimp and pot stickers. A lot of easy-to-eat things that were extremely delicious. Emmett was thoroughly enjoying himself as usual; eating every thing in sight basically.

It was snowing outside, which made the day I guess perfect. We almost had a foot of snow out there within the two hours since it started and Carlisle and the other boys were rotating on shoveling the driveway so when we left there wouldn't be a problem with it. Edward and I were taking his Volvo and Esme, Carlisle, Jasper and Alice were going to be taking Carlisle's Mercedes. Emmett and Rosalie I believe were going to be taking her car.

" Is it alright if I take a shower?" I asked, wrapping my arms around Edward's waist as he shaved.

" You don't have to ask." he chuckled.

I rolled my eyes and pulled my t-shirt over my head, letting it float to the floor below me. After tugging off my jeans and underwear I playfully flung my bra at Edward, who caught it after seeing my actions in the mirror, a smile on his face.

After a long, hot shower I stepped out with a towel around my waist and my long hair dripping. I wrung it out into the sink and wiped the mirror off. When I opened the door into the bedroom the steam scurried out and started to dissipate quickly.

Edward lay across his bed toying with his phone so I shut the bedroom door and went to my bag to get my makeup.

" I like your outfit." He teased

I went to the bathroom and pulled my wet hair back into a ponytail so that I could do my makeup; a little brown in the crease and smudged black liner on the top and bottom lash line. I swiped on mascara and put on a little foundation in a few places it was needed as well as cover-up. I lightly dabbed a red lipstick on so it wouldn't be too intense and layered over a sheer red gloss for shine.

Afterwards I lightly blow-dried my hair until it was wavy and completely dry so that I could curl it. It took me about twenty minutes to completely curl my hair in one and a half inch ringlets down my back. I loosened them up before putting in a flexible hairspray that wouldn't make my hair hard and crunchy.

That was fucking gross.

When I went into the bedroom I found my dress laid across the bed, Edward seemingly had laid it out for me. It was a gorgeous bright red dress that went about mid-thigh and the neckline went just over my collarbone. Lace overlaid the fabric to add texture, and the long sleeves clung to my arms in sheer red lace that subtly showed skin. Over it I wore a spike necklace that lay against my collarbone with the silver spikes straight down to lay against the dress.

With the dress I had a pair of four, almost five, inch black peep toe pumps. It was the first time I'd be wearing heels in a long fucking while, so I hoped I'd be able to walk in them tonight.

I slipped on my bracelet from Edward and a little gold leaf ring before putting on a little bit of perfume.

By the time I was all finished it was almost four, meaning we had to leave soon in order to make the reservation on time. Edward entered the room just as I had slipped my shoes on and my jaw almost went slack at what he was wearing.

Holy fucking sexy suit batman.

He wore a dark charcoal grey suit that fit him in a way that was fucking dangerous. It was fitted in all right places, showing off his trim waist and long thin legs. He was elegance defined. A silk red tie added color and matched my dress perfectly, which I thought was a little cheesy but cute nonetheless.

He was good enough to eat.

" You look downright sexy." Edward said lowly, drawing me into his arms and holding me closely.

" The same goes for you, Mr. Masen." I purred into his ear, lightly biting his earlobe.

" Those legs...I can't wait until we get home later."

I smiled and pulled away, keeping my arms wrapped around his neck.

He tucked a curl behind my ear, " I think you are so beautiful."

My lips touched his for just a moment before I pulled away, wiping the red gloss of his lip.

" I have something for you." he said, releasing me and going into the closet.

He pulled out an ivory colored box and set it on the bed. On the front part it had the words 'Burberry' printed out on the front in their neat letters. I looked over at Edward and he nudged me, telling me to open it.

I lifted up the lid and pulled away the sheets of tissue paper revealing a fucking beautiful coat. I reached out to press my hand against the front of it and felt the wool and cashmere blended fabric. When I lifted it out it was very light but felt warm. The sleeves were tailored to be thin and fit the arm slimly, and it went in at the waist with six black buttons that matched the color of the coat. The lapels folded over on each side, laying flat against it perfectly.

I knew these jackets were expensive, and I didn't even know what to say.

" Edward..."

" Just tell me you love it and I'll put it on you and we can enjoy the night."

I set it down on the bed and jumped into his arms. " I love it, and I love you even more. Thank you so much for this, Edward."

He picked it up and I put my arms through the sleeves, which fitted me perfectly. He didn't button it up, but it hung perfectly on me.

" Now you're attire is complete." he said, taking my hand and leading me outside as I grabbed my clutch.

When I got downstairs everybody was basically gathered in the foyer.

All of the boys wore a dashing suit that fitted them to perfection. Esme had on a beautiful dark green wrap dress that highlighted her eyes and looked amazing against her pale skin tone. Her hair was in large curls that were almost waves around her shoulders with dainty black heels on her feet. Alice however seemed to make a statement in bright white dress with short red heels and chunky necklace wrapped around her neck and her hair done in pin curls around her small face. Rosalie on the other hand was wearing a bright red dress as I was, but it was strapless and made out of what looked like a silky chiffon fabric. It was tight and short, which seemed very typical, and her gold strappy heels were actually slightly tame in what looked like only maybe three inches tall compared to my four almost five inch heels.

Edward had his arm linked around mine as we descended the stairs, and it was almost funny to see that we had basically matching coats.

When we hit the landing, safely without me tripping, Esme smiled brightly at me.

" You look absolutely gorgeous, sweetheart."

" Thank you, Esme. You look amazing as well."

She smiled and we all headed outside to the driveway. I noticed Rosalie glaring at me and speaking lowly to Emmett. No doubt about the color of my dress, she probably wanted to be the center of attention in her red dress, unfortunately not only Rosalie could stick out in a good way.

When Edward and I got into the Volvo, which was already heated up and on so we wouldn't have to wait for it to head up. Before he even put his seatbelt on he turned to me and dug a small little blue box out of his pocket.

" Edward, please tell me you di-"

He opened up the box and I was presented with a set of beautiful pearl earrings. They weren't too small, nor too big but they were beautiful.

I couldn't believe that he'd give these things to me, and while I knew he liked to spoil me; this was way too much.

" I knew whatever you wore this would look beautiful with it. Will you put these on tonight?"

" Please tell me this is all you've gotten me for Christmas, no more, Edward. This is all too much."

" It's Christmas, let me spoil you for at least one day in the year."

I took the box from him and took out the earrings, " You spoil me on our anniversary and on my Birthday."

" Alright, then three days a year. Please, accept all of this or I'll feel like shit."

I put each of them in and the smile on his face was radiant; I couldn't deny him when he looked at me like that.

" They look great." he said, leaning forward to kiss me softly.

" Promise me no more gifts."

" Sorry, babygirl. Now, let's get on the road before everybody gets pissed that we're late."

~\\~

We arrived at the restaurant at precisely six fifty seven. Edward opened up the door for me and we walked together through the snow up to the restaurant. It was completely packed, and I wasn't surprised.

The building had a tall pointed arch in the entrance with tall pillars holding it up. When we stepped inside I noticed the glass walls all around us with an amazing view of Elliot Bay all around. The interior or the restaurant was all dark wood with gold and white linens. It was elegance with a home feeling.

The hostess asked us for our reservation and we were led to the large table we had over-looking a perfect view of the bay. Edward and I sat with our backs against the glass, sitting between Alice and Rosalie's mom, who of which was on Edward's side.

She introduced herself as Lillian Hale, and her husband as Marcus Hale. While Rosalie's mom had long flowing blonde hair and bright green eyes, her father had dark almost black hair and ice blue eyes. Rosalie looked like each of them, a perfect blend.

Her mother had the same ever-present snob-ish look on her face that Rosalie had, but her dad actually looked very friendly and he shook mine and Edward's hand. However when I was introduced to Rosalie's mother I got a glare that would have killed me if it were possible. I wondered what Rosalie said about me to her mom to make her look at me like that.

We ordered our drinks and I glanced around the place some more, taking everything in. Off to the left was a small stage and music was playing, apparently at nine they would be kicking it up a notch and it would be more dance styled music, more upbeat classical. The dance floor was huge, the floor paved in deep, dark wood.

" Bella, could you pass the butter to Jasper's mom?" Alice asked.

I grabbed it and reached over to hand it off to her. Jasper's parents seemed really kind and they were also very talkative which was kind of strange considering how shy Jasper generally is.

His parents are Senna and Demetri Whitlock. Jasper's dad has his same honey blonde hair that has a little bit of a wave, but it's shorter than his sons. I could see that his eyes are a dark chocolate brown and his pale complexion is smooth as well as his facial features.

His mother on the other hand had sharp defined features from her jaw to her cheekbones, and long, straight brown hair that was similar to my color with bright blue eyes that almost sparkled. She was really pretty in a natural way, no make-up on her clean face.

Demetri and Lillian did look brother and sister, but they seemed so different in their personalities. It was always hard for me to believe that Jasper and Rosalie were cousins, but the differences between their parents were stark putting appearance aside.

Everybody ordered their meal and Edward and I kept it simple with lobster and shrimp ravioli. While everybody had conversation amongst themselves Alice, Edward and I seemed to hold conversation in our little bubble, and Jasper would pop in and say something every few minutes. Edward kept his arm draped around my chair, his fingers skimming over my shoulder.

" Isabella over here is attending New York University, in an English Major, isn't that right?" Carlisle said, leaning back in his seat as he took a drink of his wine.

Rosalie's dad Marcus smiled over at me, " I graduated NYU with a masters in Finance, good school. Was NYU always your plan of was it because of Edward over here?"

" Columbia was originally my plan, but it didn't seem to work out."

" I believe Esme spoke about my wife about you in passing, you graduated a semester early?"

I nodded, " Yes, I did."

Marcus took a sip of his water, " Well, I have many connections at Columbia, if you'd like I could talk to them and maybe pull a few strings for you this upcoming semester."

A smile was on Carlisle's face, and it was one that I would have recognized from when I first met Edward. When the man absolutely hated me because he thought I was a wrench being thrown into Edward's future, which all along had been absurd considering the fact that Edward does have a father.

The Cullen's did know about me wanting to go to Columbia, in fact I'd talked to Esme about it once before about my big dreams to go there. When it didn't work out I was disappointed, but when Edward was back and studying at Juilliard I really didn't feel like I was missing anything. We were in a good place, living in an apartment together and if I went to Columbia we couldn't do that. I'd only see him on weekends, maybe not even then during some times, and I was much too used to seeing him on a daily basis.

And if I went to Columbia, I wanted to go knowing that they wanted me there and that I was enough to be at the school, not because someone was able to pull some strings and get me in no matter if the offer was coming from a good place or not.

" Well, that's an oppurtunity you shouldn't pass up." Carlisle said.

Esme whipped her head over so fast it was a blur and she glared at him.

" I'm perfectly happy where I am right now and where I will be. Columbia just wasn't the place for me and our new apartment and the relationship we've been able to have because of living together isn't worth jeopardizing for a school that wasn't open to me attending in the first place; but I appreciate the offer." I said polietly.

He looked a little crestfallen, but kept up conversation anyways.

Edward was never one for public dispays of affection, but he turned my face towards his and leaned forward to kiss me lightly. My finger gently rested underneath his chin and I smiled.

" I love you." he whispered.

" I'd never leave you for some fucking school anyways." I whispered back.

He smiled and kissed me once more before pulling away.

" So, Isabella, it's unfortunate your father and his wife weren't able to join us." Jasper's mom, Senna noted.

The way she said it didn't sound as if she knew something and was trying to embarrass me, she genuinely seemed not to really know why they weren't here so I didn't feel the need to get all straight up with her like I had Rosalie's father.

" I don't have much of a relationship with my father, it's nothing worth speaking over."

" Oh, I'm so very sorry!" she exclaimed.

Jasper rolled his eyes at her exaggerated tone.

" Don't worry about it."

Dinner was otherwise very enjoyable, and the ravioli was really fresh and pretty tasty. Everybody was still talkative during dinner but it was kind of nice to be surrounded by people. However Rosalie's mom was grinding down on Edward's nerves. He claimed the moment I got up for any reason he was taking my seat. I purposely drank nothing just so I wouldn't be forced to be near her if I went to the washroom.

At around eight fifty the air seemed to chance and everybody was eager to get up and get moving. Edward had his hand on my knee, rubbing small circles on my skin.

When nine came around every table was clear of plates and the music was starting out slow. Everybody at our table got up and it seemed like Edward and I were the only people here sitting down. I was slightly terrified to dance in these shoes, and Edward didn't seem to mind sitting with me.

" I feel like everybody in this place is looking."

" There are hundreds of people around, half of which are still sitting and getting drunk as we speak."

He laughed and stood up as another song started to play.

And I could recognize it as the Waltz, and some people were just moving back and forth while others were dancing a bit better. Jasper and Alice were almost laughing their way through an attempt at ballroom dancing, Rosalie looked upset because Emmett couldn't take it seriously, and all of the parents besides Esme and Carlisle could do a decent waltz.

" Let's show them how it's done."

" Like you can do the waltz."

" I took dance lessons when I was a kid, so I can. Come."

He took my hand and pulled me out of my seat out onto the dance floor.

Right in the middle of the floor we stood and Edward started moving himself forward as I tried to match his steps backwards. He started out slow with me until suddenly he had me spinning around him and he was moving all around and fucking side to side all at the same time. When his hand finally clasped mine and one went around my waist I was relieved to have him leading me.

The way he moved his feet was elegant and light, and it was hard to master making it look so easy but I sure as hell was trying, moving myself in strides to follow him. We weaved through groups and at one point I felt him lift me at my waist up in the air before setting me down on the floor.

There was one song, then two and three and we were still dancing and I couldn't keep the smile off of my face.

Esme was clapping for her son and laughing at his grand dancing, knowing that he was clearly attempting to show himself off. My legs were tired and my hands were cramped from holding on for so long but it was worth every moment. When the slow songs would start he'd finally let me pull him closely against me so that I could enjoy it. His heart raced, ready for another challenge.

Another quick song followed beautiful piano music and a violin along with many other instruments that again had us going. I was sure that most everybody at our table had sat down at the table for a drink, and I couldn't seem to want to stop dancing when Edward was the one with me.

Everything was completely perfect.

Finally when another song stopped and another started, Edward stopped in the middle of the dance floor and I leaned against him, smiling and breathing heavily. He leaned forward and placed a kiss to my lips that lasted longer than was appropriate.

" I told you that you could dance, baby." he said.

I laughed and rested my head against his shoulder. As he was pulling me to walk away I caught the eye of someone who was looking at me and my entire body froze when I turned. Edward paused and gave my hand a squeeze that I vaguely felt.

Across from the room stood a decently tall man with dark brown hair and brown eyes. I had seen a smile on his face that had slightly fallen from when I looked at him to meet his gaze; but I knew that smile. I could see it in the mirror every once in awhile.

When I looked at myself.

His pale skin was the tone that I knew. The color of his eyes the same ones I'd see everyday.

" Bella, what is it, love?"

Time stopped.

" It's my father."

**Authors Note-...All be goddamned... You guys got a teaser that was a cliffhanger? I'm evil**

**So, we didn't quite make it to 700 reviews but so many of you left me reviews I was so shocked! It was so much fun to reply to every single review even though it was a lot to do. This time I want to see if maybe just a few more people will review. **

**So IF I GET TO 700 reviews this time around, I will update SATURDAY Afternoon/Early Evening.**

**Encouragement? **

**CHAPTER 46 TEASER**

_I felt like a fucking female version of this man and I didn't even fucking know him._

_" He does understand the circumstances which was precisely why he took me away from the situation."_

_" I'm not trying to cause any harm."_

_" Then what do you want?"_

_A thoughtful look came upon his face, and he stood silent for a moment before speaking; something he seemed to do often enough._

_" Maybe it isn't my place to say this; but I feel that I somehow have the right as your...father...to be able to approach you."_

_" You aren't my father."_

_His eyes just slightly narrowed, " Maybe not in ways that would count, but I am biologically."_

_" If we're done playing a game of genetics I would like to leave now." Edward said insistently._

_" What do you want?" I demanded._

**All reviews are individually replied to and bonus teasers are included! Love you guys, and I hope to update again on Saturday!**


	46. White Christmas

**Authors Note- Hello everybody, read the note down below for updating schedule in the future. Read on.**

**Disclaimer- S. Meyer owns all things Twilight.**

**Chapter Song- White Christmas by: Michael Buble, or whoever you want it to be by.**

~\\~

BPOV

~\\~

I was frozen. Unsure.

Edward had moved closer to me and wrapped his arm around my waist. I could feel him trying to move me, forward or away I wasn't at all sure but I was rooted in my spot; there was no moving.

My hand moved to rest on Edward's chest and I finally moved my gaze up to look at him; uncertainty clear in my face. The look on his face seemed to match this was as well.

The man across the room couldn't seem to take his eyes off of me, and there was a beautiful blonde haired woman by his side, and I knew that this must have been Heidi. Her hair was golden, in long ringlets down her back that matched mine almost perfectly. Her pale skin free of any blemish from what I could see, and her almost green apple colored eyes glancing at me curiously before looking up at...him.

She was tall, thin and looked beautiful by his side.

They were a gorgeous couple, there was no denying that.

I was about to turn and run the other way after weighing the chances of tripping in these shoes; I figured I could somehow make it after how many times I'd run down stairs in heels and went down James' window wells in them to get in the basement.

As I turned Edward grabbed onto me, " Bella..." he said in a trying tone.

" I don't know what to do, Edward. I can't walk up to him. I don't even know him.." I whispered.

Edward grabbed my hand in his and started leading me across the dance floor, away from the situation. We walked past our table and out of the dining room, taking me out towards the front entrance where there were long seats. The area was completely deserted, not a soul in sight.

I sat down in a chair and leaned forward, feeling my heart pound so hard in my chest it almost hurt. Edward crouched down in front of me, his long legs bent as he tried to get on my level. He took one of my hands in his and lifted my chin with the other.

" Give me the word and we can walk out of here. I don't give a fuck about anything else."

" Edward, I-"

" Isabella." a smooth, quiet voice said from just a few feet away.

I gulped, unable to raise my head and almost feeling like a coward, a child. Two things I was not.

Edward stood, still keeping his place firmly in front of me.

" Now isn't the right time to talk."

There was silence for a few moments, " And who are you?"

" Who I am has no concern to you."

" Well, sir, I'm quite positive you do not understand the circumstances."

Stop being such a fucking coward.

You spent years being strong, indifferent to those who treated you like shit just fucking stand up Bella.

I gripped my hand further in Edward's and stood up straight, keeping myself quite close to him as if he could protect me. In front of me stood Blake Moretti, his wife seemingly gone as of right now. He stood tall, but Edward had a good few inches on him that seemed to make him feel slightly intimidated.

He looked at me oddly, but I guess I was at him, too.

I felt like a fucking female version of this man and I didn't even fucking know him.

" He does understand the circumstances which was precisely why he took me away from the situation."

" I'm not trying to cause any harm."

" Then what do you want?"

A thoughtful look came upon his face, and he stood silent for a moment before speaking; something he seemed to do often enough.

" Maybe it isn't my place to say this; but I feel that I somehow have the right as your..._father_...to be able to approach you."

" You aren't my father."

His eyes just slightly narrowed, " Maybe not in ways that would count, but I am biologically."

" If we're done playing a game of genetics I would like to leave now." Edward said insistently.

" What do you want?" I demanded.

I could tell how stubborn he was, and almost impatient about it all but he'd been the one to cause it in the first place.

" Renee told me that Charlie had told you about everything; and while I am not proud of how everything had happened and worked out it was always what we all had thought was going to be best for you growing up; though that never turned out that way and it's my fault for all of it, including the divorce but that is neither here nor there. I've only talked to her a few weeks ago and I'm aware you aren't on good terms, but she told me to expect a call from you sometime in the future."

" You don't have to expect one."

" Isabella, I couldn't only assume what would happen in the future. I knew someday you would find out and wonder who I was and want to know me."

It was true.

Did I want to admit it?

Fuck no.

" Now isn't the right time for this, maybe sometime in the future but..."

" We'd like to enjoy our holiday with family." Edward filled in for me.

" I understand." he said with a nod, " After Christmas-"

" I'm going to Chicago."

I could see his frustration but also his confusion at how I was handling this. I guess a part of me was confused as well. I was pushing down the urge to spill out the millions of questions on my mind. This was Christmas time, and it was supposed to be happy and cheerful; not this. Edward and I were together for Christmas for the first time, it couldn't be anything less than perfect if I could do anything about it.

" If you want me to banish from your life all you have to do is let me know. I won't bother you, Isabella; you do whatever it is better for you. That's how all of this is supposed to be; about you and completely up to you."

A part of me felt awful because he was trying to talk to me but I was shutting him down. But the bigger part of me said that he deserved what I gave him because he just left me so he could live out his dreams.

But could I blame him? I wasn't sure.

I took a step towards him and Edward hesitantly released me.

" I don't want that. What I want in time for me to figure this out on my own, to come to you on my own time where we could talk. Not in a busy restaurant in the middle of an entrance hall."

He nodded, speaking his understanding to me.

" We should go back to the table before anybody notices." Edward said, putting his arm around my waist.

I said a quiet goodbye to the man in front of me, my father, and almost walked past him before he said my name. I looked at Edward, encouraging him to go in the dining room without me as I stood only two feet away from Blake. I didn't even know what the fuck to call him it was so confusing.

Edward gave me a worried look before leaving me alone with him, the door to the dining room closing quietly behind him.

" I just want you to know that you've grow to be a very strong young women. Bella, the upbringing you had wasn't the one I had planned on you having, and as I said; it's my fault for that because of how selfish I was, but even though you don't know me your mother sent me pictures over the years and told me all about you and I couldn't be more proud."

" Thank you." I said awkwardly, " But you're right; it was your fault. But it was also my mother's and don't think just because you try to put the blame on you it makes her any less responsible. This goes the same for my dad, or Charlie or whatever the hell you want to call him. The moment they divorced I should have known about you, even before that they should have told me. But I can't blame you for that; that's all on them."

He nodded, " Yes, I understand...I hope you have a Merry Christmas, Isabella."

I gave him a tight smile and started to walk away; looking over my shoulder at him once I neared the dining room.

" You, too...And it's Bella."

When I got back to the table I could see Edward's eyes were very much trained on me, and Esme had a nervous look on her face, only calming down when she saw me. I took a seat next to Edward after wading through the people and he wrapped his arm around the back of his chair.

" What did he say to you?"

" We'll talk later, okay?" I said quietly, leaning my head over to rest my temple on his shoulder.

I felt his hand on my knee clench slightly.

" Do you want to go home, Bella?" he asked me.

I nodded.

He stood swiftly from the table and I leaned forward as he grabbed my coat.

" We're going to head home a little bit early." Edward said quietly to Esme and Carlisle.

" Want us to go home with you? Are you going to be okay, sweetheart?" Esme asked me worriedly.

I smiled, " No, Esme. Have fun, enjoy the night. Thank you so much for this."

" Of course, you kids be safe on the roads tonight, okay?" Carlisle said.

We nodded and Edward helped me slip into my jacket before buttoning his up as well. When we got outside I could feel the biting cold air on my legs, and the slight wind only made this worse. Edward got in the freezing cold car and started to heat it up immediately. We stayed for a moment, letting the engine warm up a little before hopping on the highway.

The drive was quiet, but my hand stayed in Edward's the entire time. I ended up falling asleep an hour into the drive, drifting off with the quiet sounds of Mumford and Sons playing through the speakers. It was on low, the warm air blowing through the vents; soothing enough to clear my mind and help me sleep.

~\\~

" We're home, Bella." I heard a quiet voice whisper close to me.

I sighed and my eyes fluttered open tiredly. After a long, drawn out yawn I grabbed my clutch and stepped out of the car, keeping my arm locked in Edward's as we walked up the stairs to the front door. I wasn't taking a risk of breaking my ankle in these heels.

The entire house was pitch black and when the front door slammed behind us it echoed. I ran a hand through my hair and sighed, no longer feeling tired but, emotionally feeling spent. Before I could even have another thought Edward swept me into his arms; making me scream in surprise from the suddenly movement.

The sound echoed off the walls and I laughed as he carried me up the stairs. We walked down the long hallway towards his room. Once we got inside he laid me over the bed and turned on the stand lamp near his television. He stripped off his jacket as I did mine and kicked his shoes off.

Before I got the chance he grabbed my ankle and slipped my heel off, tossing it on the floor and doing the same with the other one. I leaned forward and grabbed onto his tie, loosening it up as he shrugged off the suit jacket. Once his tie was off he laid down next to me silently, taking me in his arms and holding me closely. I immediately sunk into him and buried my face in his chest, breathing in his musky warm scent.

I felt his fingers roam up my back to the top of my dress; he found the small hidden zipper and started to pull it down slowly until it stopped just at the waistband of my underwear, which was not of the sexy and lacy variety.

" There's nothing sexy underneath here." I said as he pulled at the sleeves for them to come off, revealing just a simple Victoria's Secret cotton padded bra, something I rarely wore in cases like this.

" Bella, I don't give a fuck. You could be in saggy granny panties and a sports bra; it doesn't matter."

I laughed quietly at the image in my head as he started to pull the dress completely off of me. He tossed it at his lounger and I brought my hands to the buckle of his belt as he unbuttoned his shirt. I pulled and tugged until he was in just his fitted Ralph Lauren boxer briefs. Once his slacks hit the ground my arms wrapped around his waist and I hugged him tightly to me. His hand stroked the back of my head soothingly.

" Nobody's home, it's so quiet." I whispered.

" Perfect." he replied, slowly leaning his head down to touch his lips to mine.

We laid together, arms tightly holding each other as our lips moved languidly for what seemed like hours. It was comforting and romantic and passionate without being intense. Our hands never wandered underneath anything, only around our waist and stomach.

At some point we could hear everybody else getting home by the light that was flooding into the room. Edward hopped out of the warm bed and closed the door before getting back in bed to me, wrapping me up in his arms tightly before rolling over so I was facing near his bathroom and outside doors instead of his bedroom door. He pulled the comforter around my shoulders but left it around his hips.

I heard footsteps towards his door and then the small creak as it first opened, but I felt as if I were half asleep, only barely hearing everything that was going on.

" I think their sleeping." Alice whispered.

I heard a quiet chuckle coming from Emmett, " Naked? Ew, Edward naked. How sick, poor Bella."

A slap sounded, " Shut it."

" Don't hit me!"

" Quiet, they will wake up!"

There was a scoff," Doubt that."

" Get out!"

" You're so pushy!"

Edward let out a long, loud groan, " Can you both just shut the fuck up, please?!"

Alice laughed loudly and suddenly the bed was shaking, " Nice faking, Edward."

" It's kind of off-putting being this close to my step-sister only wearing underwear." Edward mumbled into the pillow.

" I've seen you in swim trunks and in a towel."

" What did you both need?"

" We were going to have a fire in the fire place and stay up all night!"

Edward stroked my head again and I felt my body sink further into sleep.

" Bella's just really tired right now and it's been a hard night, guys." Edward replied.

" Yeah...Okay. Well, I'll see you in the morning! Sleep well." Alice said enthusiastically.

I distantly heard Emmett say something before everything drifted into a swirl of soundless black.

~\\~

" Bella."

Kiss.

" It's Christmas."

Kiss.

" And as beautiful as you look asleep right now..."

Kiss.

" Emmett will kick our fucking asses if we don't go downstairs soon."

Kiss.

I rolled over, out of his grasp and hugged a cool pillow to me, my back facing Edward.

" Come on, beautiful." Edward whispered, wrapping his arms around me from behind.

I leaned back against him with a deep sigh, " I don't want to."

" I know, but I bet there is coffee downstairs and my mom said she was going to be making bacon, eggs and toast for everybody...She even mentioned French toast I think."

He was bribing me with food and it was working...Like magic.

Edward left the warm bed and I heard him opening up drawers before clothing was tossed at me. It was a pair of plaid warm pants, socks, a tank top and a hoodie that belonged to him following afterwards. I slipped everything on begrudgingly as Edward put on a few things himself.

Once I poked my head through his sweatshirt I ran my fingers through my hair to untangle the curls. We walked downstairs lazily and I could smell the coffee and bacon, the perfect fucking combination.

" FINALLY! God, mom said we had to wait until at least nine to wake you guys up, it's eight forty five and I've been waiting since six thirty, lazy asses!"

Edward shoved his shoulder with an eye roll and sat down at the kitchen table, pulling me along with him.

" Merry Christmas to you, too, Emmett." I grumbled tiredly as Esme set a cup of coffee in front of me, already filled with cream and sugar.

She's a saint.

Edward yawned beside me and draped his arm on the top of the chair I sat in.

" Lucky for you I've got breakfast still hot and ready." Esme said, setting a plate of bacon, eggs and French toast coated in cinnamon sugar. I salivated at the sight of it and couldn't wait to dig in. Edward received the same, with double the amount for his gigantic appetite.

After enjoying the breakfast Esme had made for us we gathered in the living room by the large Christmas tree. Emmett was sitting by the tree excitedly, ready to hand out all of the gifts, and eyeing the huge box next to it that didn't quite fit under it.

Unfortunately the tag on it said it was for Edward and it was from me. He didn't seem to have looked at it at all though to notice it was for him, so when Emmett slid it towards him and he looked at the tag, his eyes went accusingly to me.

" You realize we have to get on a plane to Chicago after this, right?"

I smiled, " Yes, Esme said she would ship it for us a few days before we go back to New York."

He wrapped his arm around me and Emmett started sliding gifts towards Alice, Esme, himself, Carlisle and a few slid towards me that weren't from Edward.

" You guys didn't need to get me anything, I completely crashed your holiday." I said.

Esme waved her hand, " You're family to us, Bella."

Edward kissed my forehead and smiled, whispering a quiet 'I love you' into my ear.

Once the tree had nothing left underneath it everybody started to tear into their things. It was nice to see Alice holding up a beautiful designer shirt she got, saying how much she loved it and Emmett's over enthusiastic attitude towards his gift.

It was actually really hard to figure out what to get the Cullen's, because they literally have everything they would need. For Alice I had gotten her a little diamond shoe charm from Tiffany's, a PINK gift card and a pair of cute black fringe boots that were a little expensive, but Edward and I went half on them when we went on out shopping for her. She was so excited about them I couldn't get her off me for a few seconds.

She deserved it though after everything she had helped me out with when I was in the hospital, I couldn't ever repay her for all of that and I'd always be so grateful.

Emmett was the hardest out of everybody, and I'd gotten him a small gift card to a sports store that Edward said he liked to frequent, and even got to sneak in and get him a new iPod touch because his apparently broke his while he was on the field at UW because he forgot it was in his pocket. Edward paid for a small amount of it and got him a few other things, but he was so excited to open up the box it was ridiculous.

For Carlisle I'd found this really awesome store in the mall that Esme told me about when I was in New York. Apparently his briefcase was getting very worn. It was a one year anniversary gift from Esme but it was worn down from so much use over the years. So I'd found a beautiful burgundy leather one and once I had sent the picture to Esme; she said he would love it. I got the silver metal tag on it engraved with ' Dr. Carlisle Cullen' and it was a little tad bit on the expensive side, but it was well made and worth it.

Esme actually was the easiest; she loved absolutely everything so I got her a bunch of little things and a few more expensive items. I'd gotten her a few cook books that she seemed very excited about and I'd went to a Von Maur store and got her a gift card because Edward claimed that she practically lives there every weekend. I'd gotten her two little Pandora charms for the bracelet I've seen her wear almost every day that were really cute, as well as a basket that I had made myself that was full of nice lotions, body sprays, bath salts and bath bombs from Lush and just fun girly things that I knew she would enjoy.

" Oh my goodness, Isabella. This is all too much, thank you sweetheart." she gushed, walking over to give me a hug and setting a box on my lap, yet another from her and Carlisle.

She had gotten me the softest cashmere sweaters I'd ever even fucking touch and they had to be expensive, they'd gotten me three as well as a pair of Seven jeans, which Edward must have told her I needed jeans, these probably cost more than my entire wardrobe. She took her seat next to Carlisle and looked from me to the box, asking me to open it with her eyes.

There was a black leather box, and when I opened it up I saw that it was a Michael Kors watch. It had a reflective rainbow effect plate on the front, and it was rose gold with diamond studs all around it in two even rows. It was absolutely gorgeous and I couldn't believe they would get something like this for me. The little hands were rose gold as well, and it had a number on the bottom to represent the date. I liked the rose gold, because it was so different from silver or gold, and it was a subtle pink tone that didn't look like too much.

" I can't accept this." I said simply.

" You can and you will." she said with finality, looking through one of her new cookbooks.

Edward nudged me, " Can you please open mine now?"

The things he had gotten me were somehow wrapped perfectly and stacked just the same. He had gotten me favorite books of mine that were falling apart in first editions. Then started the other small things, music gift cards, many others from my favorite stores I shopped at and a specifically big one for one of those fancy lingerie stores that I hid from everybody else. He got me many t-shirts from Hot Topic and a few other stores and a little Christmas tree charm for my Tiffany bracelet. There was too much from him and I couldn't believe he did all of this for me.

Then I saw he had gotten me a pair of Steve Madden combat boots. They had a half inch heel at the bottom and they were this charcoal dark grey color with a brown sole and short heel with black laces. All in all, they were fucking awesome.

" Does this mean you like them?"

" Hell yeah, these are fucking awesome. Thank you so much."

I wrapped my arms around him and then grabbed the last and final gift which was an envelope. I opened it up and saw that it was an invoice but the price was scratched out and I saw it said Kindle on it.

" The second generation version of the Kindle is coming out in February and I already pre-ordered it for you, so it's going to be late but I figured you would like it for at school between classes. I know you love your books for the classics but I thought it would be convenient for when new books come out. I could've gotten the first generation, this I just thought was a better idea."

It was really thoughtful and I was glad that with all of these things they were all things that I loved and enjoyed. He knew me, and in all these gifts it showed that.

" Now it's your turn."

As I usually did for holidays, anniversaries or Birthdays for him, I'd purchased a new leather bound composition book that was different and unique from all the others. This one had a wrap leather strand around it with a writing utensil already on the inside. The leather had a smooth finish with a silver metal plate with his name engraved into it. On the back there was another that said Merry Christmas on it. Then I had gotten him a brand new shoulder bag, except this one was made out of a nice, sturdy, black leather. His other one was so beat considering he had it since the beginning of high school.

As he had gotten for me, I'd done a few small gifts like little gift cards, t-shirts and a brand new pair of Toms because his were getting ridiculously beat-up and old. I got him a cigarette lighter that he was very confused by, it was a green frog and when you flipped its head off to the side it would light. Everybody else got a hilarious kick out of it and Edward rolled his eyes.

Then finally he came to his huge gift that everybody was so curious about. The moment the paper had torn down the side from being ripped open, he leaned back and closed his eyes, shaking his head. It wasn't quite the reaction that I was expecting at all.

" No, you shouldn't have done this. You're kidding me right?"

I smiled and leaned into his side. " I don't know, you're just going to have to see."

He tore all of the paper off and I could see Esme smiling from the corner of my eye.

" You kicked my ass in the present department." he said, wrapping his arm around me and burying his face in my neck.

" I love every single thing you got me." I said, kissing his cheek.

Edward pulled back slightly and reached out to touch the box in front of him.

I remembered awhile ago the summer before last Edward telling me he had to leave a few things behind in Chicago, including the piano he had first played on and his music player.

It was able to play records, CD's and cassette tapes and he really missed it because he has so many records that are classics that he used to enjoy playing. So I'd taken it upon myself to buy him a brand new one.

It was solid black wood with the record player ontop and the cassette and CD player in the middle with silver knobs and buttons and large speakers on either side. At the bottom there were two glass doors to store music, and I knew it wasn't enough for Edward's collection but it was really nice, and I paid a good chunk of change for it so I hoped he would love it.

" Thank you so much. God, women, do you have any idea how much I love you?"

He leaned in and kissed my lips softly, not caring about his family around us right there in the room. I smiled and leaned away, running my fingers through his hair before resting against his side.

Everybody thanked each other for the gifts we had all received and I loved everything from Emmett's silly book he got me that was called ' Big Ass Book of Crafts' which looked actually really cool, to the watch Esme and Carlisle got me, Edward's t-shirts he picked out for me and the purple skinny jeans Alice found. Honestly, I loved all the gifts and while I felt weird for accepting them because this whole thing was foreign to me for so many years; it was a good feeling to see everybody fucking happy and to be included on it.

I was laying across the couch, taking tags off of my clothes while Edward sat with my head in his lap doing the same to his. Emmett suddenly came barreling into the room all excited heading towards me. He tossed something at me that landed on my stomach.

" I picked this up yesterday with Rose, and she thought it was stupid but I thought it was awesome, will you wear it?!" he said in an excited rush.

I picked it up and saw that it was a new industrial bar that had a little brown monkey in the middle of it and on the end with the two metal balls there were small painted on bananas. To be honest, it was fucking stupid, but it was funny as hell that Emmett bought it for me so that's why I loved it.

Edward laughed and I handed it to him, starting to take out the other one.

" Can you put it in?" I asked him as I slid out the other one.

" Seriously, you'll wear it?!"

I laughed, " Fuck yeah, why not?"

Edward carefully put it in for me and secured the each ball at the end. I set my other one on the coffee table and Emmett laughed.

" It looks awesome."

" Good, and thanks, I bet I'll get a lot of attention for it."

Edward traced the shell of my ear and then resumed his work. I reached up to touch the small monkey and smiled at the ridiculousness of it before resuming what I was doing. When I was finished de-tagging everything I decided to put on my new watch and gazed at it. It was really pretty and I absolutely loved it. I wasn't one much for pink, but it was so pretty I didn't even care.

" I feel like there is way too much from everybody." I said quietly to him, playing with the hem of his shirt.

" They love you, and Christmas means you are allowed to be spoiled."

" I just can't remember-"

He leaned down to kiss my forehead, " I know, and that's why they want to make it special. You never got this after everything with your parents."

I leaned up and wrapped my arm around his neck, pulling him down to meet me for a kiss. His hand squeezed my waist while his other one wrapped around the back of my neck.

" Okay, okay, that's enough of that! Take that upstairs!" Emmett complained.

Just then Esme came in with a tray of random little snacks that had been left over from yesterday. Apparently she was making a big meal for tonight and nobody was allowed in the kitchen so we all would be best to steer clear.

Since Esme and Carlisle's family weren't going to be here for Christmas, apparently they were going to be showing up for a New Year's party that they were going to be having. Edward said he was glad that we'd be in Chicago because apparently things can get a little wild.

" Oh, Bella, you should have seen Edward last year when you weren't here... So Carlisle's brother Liam has a daughter whose name is Carmen and she's Edward's age. Christ, she followed Edward around everywhere last year. Remember, dude? She was trying to sit in your lap and by the end of the night passed out drunk on you on the couch because she collapsed!"

Edward groaned and I sharply gazed at him, " What?!"

" It's not like I showed interest. Carlisle is my step-father, making her I guess my step cousin and even though we aren't at all blood related it would be fucking weird."

I pinched his leg, " You better not have shown interest."

" Ow! Stop with the abuse, woman. And what if I did? Hm?"

" I'd have kicked your ass. Even if we weren't _together _we were still together."

Emmett laughed, " Sorry, man, didn't realize Bella here would get pissed about it."

" What about good ol' Crazy Mary?" Alice basically shouted.

Edward covered his face, " Oh, no. Seriously, Alice?"

" Who is crazy Mary?" I asked.

" Oh my god! Edward never told you?! Well her parents are old family friends of the Cullen's for literally generations and always have been. Their names are Victor and Janelle Harrison, and they have an adopted daughter named Mary who is maybe a year younger than you, Bella...Well, when my dad first married Esme obviously we all kind of met them at their wedding, and Mary had her eyes set on Edward and he was just fifteen, right? Well, she kept quiet about her little crush until we were going to be moving out here."

Edward shook his head, " Can we please not continue this?"

Alice completely ignored him, " Anyways, so it was the Christmas before we were moving and we had this huge party all the family was there in Chicago, and I just remember her sitting next to me at the table telling me how hot he was and it was so weird! I mean, Edward's my brother so I didn't know what to say. She was saying that the whole bad boy thing was a real turn on, and the girl is barely sixteen."

I couldn't help but laugh, it was pretty hilarious to hear that some girl really had the hot's for poor Edward.

" So what? Edward, you were heading upstairs to grab something?" Alice said, trying to think.

" I went upstairs to get a clean shirt because I had gotten punch on it when I ran into someone. So I'm walking up the stairs and unbuttoning my shirt; I mean, nobody was upstairs anyways or so I thought.." he said with a groan.

" Finish!" I said, knowing where this had to be going.

" I walked into my room and found crazy Mary laying in my bed, completely naked on my brand new red silk sheets I got for Christmas. She wasn't wearing fucking anything and when I had walked in, because I was holding the shirt I took off, she was going on about how I could sense she was there and I was 'getting ready' for her."

" Oh my god! Wait, red silk sheets?!"

" I liked silk sheets."

I laughed behind my hand, " Did you even feel a little bit attracted to her? I mean, teenage boy, naked girl?"

" Holy fuck not even."

" I walked in on the scene to see where Ed here had gone because Esme needed him for something and didn't know where he'd went. That girl was laying there al natural, and I mean, I'm not an asshole that will go tell a girl she needs to...clean herself up a bit, but not only was she going on down south, but she doesn't shave her arm pits! That shit is just nasty!"

I put my hands over my eyes, trying not to get the mental images and groaned.

" Oh my god, that is terrible."

" I almost threw up, almost did."

" What did you do?!" I asked Edward.

Emmett choked out another laugh and Edward sighed.

" I told her to get the fuck out of my room and to take the sheets with her because I didn't want anything associated with her or her being naked in my room."

" It was harsh as fuck, but funny as hell. He was so pissed off. I swear, he wasn't even fazed by the fact she was naked in his bed."

" Remind me to never surprise you by being naked in bed." I teased him, resting my head back on his lap.

He narrowed his eyes and looked down at me, his lip curled up on the side.

" Baby, if you ever want to surprise me naked in our bed than feel free to proceed." He said saucily, winking at me.

" You guys are gross." Alice complained.

I rolled my eyes and sat up, picking up the de-tagged clothes beside me and started to fold them in a nice pile. Once I was finished I went upstairs to put everything in Edward's bedroom.

~\\~

The rest of Christmas passed quickly and spending time with the Cullen's and Edward had been amazing. I couldn't have asked for a better holiday.

I hadn't received a call from my parents but my mother sent me an e-mail to let me know I had a gift coming to me in the mail. It was being sent to the Cullen's but I didn't get it before Edward and I got on a plane to Chicago.

I saw Leah the day after Christmas because she and Alice were exchanging gifts. She was driving now, which was extremely weird, and she said that Jake was in Drivers Ed already. It was weird to see how things had changed. She told me that her mom and Charlie were getting along better now than they had before, apparently everything that had happened between my father and I last Christmas put a strain on their relationship, but things were better.

To be perfectly honest, I didn't understand why because Sue never seemed to give a shit how he treated me, but that was that. I knew she was a sweet woman, unfortunately I never got the chance to even get to know her because of everything that had happened.

Even though my father and I had a shifted relationship after finding out he wasn't my actual father; it didn't mean that I forgave him for everything he'd done to me and put me through. It wasn't a free pass. Just because he was angry at the situation doesn't mean I had deserved to be treated as I had been, but that's how things had gone and were meant to be. In the end it wasn't going to change.

The same went for my mother for lying to me for so many years, and while I was angry at her the fact that I missed her and loved her started to outweigh all of that. I just couldn't understand why all of this had to be a lie, and that was what was holding me back from having a civil conversation with her.

I stared out the window as we started to land in Chicago; snow covered the ground and lightly fell from the air. Edward squeezed my hand and I glanced over at him, feeling the comfort of him next to me.

As long as I had him, none of that all mattered.

**Authors Note- I'm so sorry that it took so long for this chapter to get out, especially because I had been teasing you guys about Bella meeting her actual father.**

**If you read the note that was posted as this chapter, or followed me on Twitter (which I highly recommend you do), you'd find that I had passed out and got a concussion Labor Day weekend. I'd had to go to the hospital once, and then had to go back two days later because my symptoms were too overwhelming to handle on my own. I had to take a week off to rest, because concussions are seriously a bitch if you've ever had one, and after a week I was finally able to walk around, but it took me a few extra days to get back in schedule and then I was tossed into my fall classes starting; which is why this took extra long to get through.**

**Thank you to those you sent me messages hoping that I was okay, it means the world to me and I'm so sorry I didn't get to reply; I was trying to get better quick so I could get on editing this chapter, but I hope you all loved it.**

**REVIEWS get TEASERS!**


	47. Chicago

**Authors Note- We're going to have some good, some-what drama free times in Chicago for Edward and Bella. I know this chapter is late, mostly because I've been so caught up in writing I haven't been getting myself in gear for editing these chapters; I apologize sincerely. Next chapter won't be as late as this one, I promise!**

**Disclaimer- S. Meyer owns all things Twilight.**

**Chapter Song- Chicago by: Kate Voegle, maybe it doesn't fit the chapter, but it's called Chicago so lets roll with the punches.**

~\\~

BPOV

~\\~

" Bella! It's so nice to see you. How are you?" Edward Sr. asked as he pulled me into a hug.

I smiled, " I'm doing pretty good, you?"

" Good, even better now. Son?" he asked, turning towards Edward.

There was a certain light to Edward's eyes that I couldn't place, but he seemed extremely happy to see his dad. I knew that he loved spending Christmas with his mom, but there was just something about seeing his dad that was different.

" Hey, dad."

They embraced briefly and he patted Edward on the shoulder, " It's good to see you both. Bella, welcome to Chicago; I bet Edward can't wait to show you everything."

Edward wrapped his arm around me, pulling me close, " I really can't. It's going to be a fucking blast."

Edward Sr. laughed and we headed off towards baggage claim to grab our things. They both insisted on grabbing everything that we had packed, so I was left walking around with my carry-on. They were fucking heavy since they held our extra Christmas gifts, so I wasn't about to complain.

" Can't let a pretty lady carry these bags." his father noted.

" Lady?" Edward chuckled.

I slapped his chest, " Play nice."

He gave me a wink and we walked right outside O'Hare Airport. Everything went around in a curve and we headed over to where he was parked, a sleek black Jaguar convertible XF in a space not far from the entrance. I knew it had to be a 2009 or a 2008 model of the car; it looked brand new and newly waxed.

" Nice wheels, Mr. Masen."

" Only the best."

We loaded everything into the car and I hopped into the backseat, noticing all of the gadgets and gidgets all around me. It was pretty high tech and Edward seemed to enjoy himself sitting in the passenger seat, complimenting his dad's car choice.

The drive through Chicago was awesome. We didn't see the buildings for afar, instead; we drove right on the streets of them. It was so different from New York and Seattle in a good way. We drove by Lake Michigan and I saw the sparkling blue water that obviously was not being put to use; but it was pretty anyways. Snow lightly blanketed the ground, not heavily but enough to call it a good snowfall.

When we pulled up to the house that I knew had to be where Edward grew up; I could sense the nostalgia coming off of Edward. His father got out of the car and Edward and I followed after. I noticed how his dad grabbed bags and immediately headed into the house, giving us time to look around and check out the house.

" This is where you grew up?"

" Yeah...I still can't believe he's kept the house after they divorced...He does it for me."

I wrapped my arms around him and looked up at the beautiful two story house. It was very charming in a way with black siding and a cream/white brick around the front windows that were set in a turret. To the left I could see the back porch in the backyard. The front porch was small with two white columns and railings going up five short steps up to the house. I could picture a younger Edward running up and down them.

The front door was a single dark door with a window to its right. A large tree towered over the roof near the porch; which provided some nice shade. The back of the house didn't seem to have much light, but the front did. The roof of the house pointed in three spots, and there was a smaller turret above the porch. Edward pointed towards it to grab my attention.

" That's where my room is. I used to sneak out the window and climb down the roof, using the porch railing to get up and down, then I'd use the siding to push myself up." he said with a short laugh.

He grabbed two duffels from the trunk and shut the door before nodding for me to head inside. When I opened the door I was immediately enveloped in a feeling of _home_. It felt so warm and comfortable.

I heard the door shut behind me but I was too busy looking around. All of the floors were a dark wood and in front of the front door was an area rug, and above was a high ceiling with an elegant chandelier hanging from it. To the front left against the wall was a staircase, and unlike at the Cullen's, there wasn't a huge opening of the wall above with a banister; which gave it a different ambiance.

On the left was a small sitting room/library. There were two brown plush couches pushed against a wall with a glass coffee table and a bookcase on the wall. The interior of the turret had a small seat all around it that was cushioned with a pillow at the end, completely untouched or anything. Edward looked at it sadly.

" Everyday she'd wait there for me to come home on the bus." he whispered, not wanting his father to hear anything.

I looked around, and even though it felt like home, it also felt like there was something missing that gave a slight sad feel to the space that I couldn't explain. I shook it off and looked over to the right which was just two doors and a table at the end near the front door that had a bowl with keys and mail it looked like.

We set out things down and Edward led me towards the kitchen and living room. The kitchen was to the left and it was very spacious with a bay window looking out over the backyard. There was a pool that was filled with snow, uncovered with no lining showing that it hadn't been used at all, or not as of recently. The kitchen had dark wood cabinets matching the floor with cream/caramel colored granite countertops and glass cabinets that had dark wooden framing. All the way in the corner towards the left of the kitchen near the fridge was a side door with a glass window that showed the porch.

They didn't have a dining room, but about four feet away from the sliding glass door leading to the wrap around back porch there was a glass kitchen table with a wooden frame with wooden table chairs. There were four chairs on either side of the rectangular table and a floor rug underneath it.

On the right was the living room, cream colored carpet and brown leather couches. It was very cozy looking with throw blankets tossed over it and there was a fire crackling in the fireplace. In the corner of the room there was a large flat screen on top of a long, short table with drawers like the one in Edward and I's apartment. Against the wall on the right was a music system with shelves upon shelves holding records, tapes and CD's. It was amazing.

" What do you think, Bella?" Edward Sr. asked me, coming around the corner from the foyer.

" It's great. I love it here." I said with a small smile.

" Let me show you upstairs." Edward said, pulling my hand towards the foyer.

On the way up he grabbed the bags and the hallway once upstairs was spacious with windows on the front wall that opened everything up. On the left he pointed to his father's room, his office and then showed me his piano.

It was a beautiful baby grand that was to the right of the small room, and the light from the front windows brought in generous light. Like the interior turret downstairs there was also a seat on this one too going all around with a soft cushion.

" I learned everything on this right here." he told me.

My arm wrapped around his waist, " I can see a little version of you sitting on that bench."

He chuckled, " I bet. Now let me show you my room."

Edward's room was the only room on the right of the house besides his bathroom that was attached. The room wasn't huge, but it wasn't small.

The walls were a royal blue color and the walls were covered with so many posters it was ridiculous. It reminded of how my room was back at Charlie's before I took it all down. They were mostly band posters varying from Green Day to My Chemical Romance to The Clash and The Beatles. It was awesome. The room looked completely untouched but not dusty in any way.

" I didn't get to spend much time here after they separated...My mom liked to keep a close eye on me but on weekends I did. When we moved to Forks most of my things in the house I stayed with my mom was moved back here."

On the left the wall pushed in to show the bathroom and in the small nook between that wall on the other side and the bedroom wall there was a desk with an old looking laptop sitting on it along with a few knick-knacks littered around. There were two closed drawers and then a desk chair in front of it. The front wall had a window with a long dresser and at the right end there was a flat screen that was turned towards the bed to be able to watch from there.

The bed was next to the wall with the small turret, and it appeared to be a queen size…with black fucking silk sheets, a matching comforter and grey cotton pillows. I couldn't believe the silk on his bed; it was bizarre.

Edward set everything down and sat on his bed, looking around his room with a small smile on his face.

" I never got a chance to have a girl in here." he noted.

He had a small end table with a stainless steel lamp and a red shade with an alarm clock that wasn't plugged in sitting on it.

I sat down on his bed next to him, putting my bag off to the side. I ran my hand over his sheets and had to laugh.

" How old were you when you got these?"

" They were in the other house, and it was right after the debacle with Crazy Mary."

I stood up and went to stand between his parted legs. He wrapped his arms around my waist and I pushed at his shoulders and he fell back, bringing me with him. Before I could speak he rolled us over across the bed so I was on my back.

" I'm so happy to be here with you." he said, leaning forward to lightly kiss my lips.

" I'm happy you wanted me to come with."

" Of course I would take you with. What, think I'd leave you to fend for yourself with my mother and the rest of them?"

I smiled, " What's wrong with that?"

" They'd drive you fucking insane and you know it."

He was totally right. I loved the Cullen's, but sometimes they were a little too much.

So I'd spend my time with the Masen's instead.

I smiled and wrapped my arms tightly around his waist, pulling him closer. He leaned in to give me a long, deep kiss. Our tongues moved slowly together, lips fitting perfectly against each others. When hands started to travel underneath clothes I pulled away.

" Nope." I told him with finality.

" Nope?" he questioned breathily, lightly nipping my earlobe and tugging on my cartilage ring.

I moaned, " Edward, don't tempt me. No sex."

" As in right now or on this entire trip?"

" Entire trip." I said, pushing on his chest.

He pulled back, " My dad works late nights, he won't really be home unless it's New Years."

His mouth pressed against my neck wetly before softly sucking on the sensitive skin.

" Enough, enough! I'm tired and hungry. Do you think your dad has food?"

" We're going to have to check." he murmured, kissing me again.

I smiled against his lips and wiggled out from underneath him, leaving him glaring at me from his bed.

" I'm going to find dinner. Feel free to make-out with a fucking pillow." I said with a laugh as he tossed one at me.

When I went downstairs it was empty, but there was a note on the counter from Edward's dad saying for us to help ourselves to the food in the fridge and cabinets, he was apparently 'at the office'. I opened up the fridge and surprisingly found plenty of food. Chicken breasts and steak filets as well as fresh vegetables, salad bags and pretty much left a lot of idea's for what to make.

I started with boiling two chicken breasts and started on heating a little chicken broth. There were white beans in the cabinet and there were some fresh green chilis as well so after shredding the chicken when it was completely cooked; I started making a white bean and chicken chili.

Edward wandered downstairs and laughed when he saw me in the kitchen making us dinner.

" Feeling right at home, baby?" he asked, wrapping his arms around my waist and kissing my shoulder.

" Well, he said to help ourselves to the fridge, apparently he left."

" Thought so."

Out of the fridge Edward grabbed two water bottles as I stirred the chili in the pot for awhile. I made enough for his dad when he got home not to be rude. He was taking me in, the least I could do was make dinner.

When everything was cooked I joined Edward at the table and he was very quiet, so I didn't break the silence that was surrounding us. The only sound that was heard was the spoons against the bowls, and when it was finished he took our bowls and put them in the dishwasher before turning the kitchen light off. It was nearing nine and the flight had exhausted us. I was ready to collapse into those damn silk sheets and sleep.

I put the lid on top of the pot with a note on the counter and went upstairs. I decided to take a shower because there was just something about being on a plane that made me feel grimy for some reason, even sitting in first class.

Edward's bathroom was simple, light blue, white and dark green. The shower door was glass and opened like an actual door rather than sliding like I was used to at the Cullen's and our apartment. He grabbed a few towels from the closet in the hallway and put them on the shelf above the toilet. His dad probably didn't bother to keep any in there because nobody vacated the bathroom anyways.

After a long, hot shower I changed into a pair of boxer shorts and a simple t-shirt. Edward took a shower right after me and I crawled into bed and flipped through the television channels, settling on something that both Edward and I liked before cuddling underneath the blankets.

The sheets were silky, and since the room was a little cool I couldn't seem to get warm. When Edward came out of the bathroom he seemed to understand I was fucking freezing my ass off.

" We have extra blankets in the closet, hold on." he said, slipping out of the room with a towel wrapped around his waist.

He came back with a thick brown and cream colored quilt. When he saw it he smiled.

" My mom made this when I was about three years old. I used it all the time in the winter."

" Esme made this? Wow."

It was thick and warm, and I layered it on top of the comforter already on the bed; already getting warmer.

Much better.

" Before she got swept up in all this bullshit."

I furrowed my eyebrows and watched as he took out a pair of boxers from his bag.

" What do you mean?"

He shook his head, " Nothing."

" Talk to me." I said softly, meeting his glowing green eyes.

" I love my mom, Bella. I really do, but who you know her as isn't who I grew up with." Edward said cryptically.

He was talking in circles trying to avoid it. " What's that supposed to mean?"

" Carlisle just showers her with diamonds and jewels and hell, brand new everything from designer clothes to new wedding bands with thousands of diamonds on them that it's ridiculous. Maybe every few years, but every few months? It's just so...I don't know."

Edward never really made any comments about all of the money and neither did I. I guess it was just something that was there, was used and that was the end of it; nothing more to say.

" I never thought it bugged you?"

" My mom deserves the best, she's my mom...But look at you; when I buy you something nice I see the look in your eyes and I just see how much you love it and appreciate it. You wear everything I've ever gotten you on a daily basis and when I see you gaze at it I can tell that you love it whether I got it for you when we first met or what I got you most recently."

I nodded, listening intently to him.

" And my mom was the same way. My dad's company didn't start picking up until around the time they were getting divorced. It took him awhile to get established and make higher pay, so she wasn't fucking lying in diamonds every month. I'd just remember when he'd get her something on Valentine's Day or her Birthday she would just light up. She'd say it was too much and thank him just like you do to me. Now it's just like she expects it, like it's something she has to have because that's just how it is. And she has all this shit lying in jewelry boxes; never touching the old things because she has all the new."

I could understand what he was saying, and it wasn't just about diamonds. He saw how his mother went from almost being humbled and so appreciative to entitled and expectant of all of the riches. In a way I guess that would bother me as well if I were him.

" I don't want that with you." he started, " I love to give you things but god...It makes it feel happy when I see the way you look at me when I buy you something nice."

I smiled, " I'll always appreciate everything you give me; whether I receive something every day or once a year." I assured him, patting the spot on the bed next to me.

He slid in wearing just a pair of sleep pants, drawing me into his arms and his skin was still warm from the shower. He smelled like fresh soap and a musky/cinnamon scent that was purely him, tempting me to burrow myself deeper.

" I know, baby." he whispered, kissing my forehead.

I rested my head on his chest and his hand traveled up my back until his fingers were buried in my hair; running through the damp strands.

" What're we doing tomorrow?"

" Everything." he sighed, pulling me on top of him and taking my arms to lay them near his neck as he kissed my wrists and finally moved his arms to hold me around my waist.

~\\~

I woke up in the middle of the night feeling smothered, because I was.

Edward laid on top of me with his face in my neck breathing heavily. His left arm was wrapped around my neck and almost his entire body weighed down on me, left leg between both of mine and his right trapped against my left.

He wasn't heavy per se, but I wasn't at all comfortable sleeping like this. Or being awake to deal with it furthermore.

" Edward." I said tiredly, trying to push him off.

A humming noise escaped him and I felt his right arm push under my body to wrap around my waist, a contented sigh leaving him. It was nice that he was comfortable, but fuck I was going to die, his right arm was wedged oddly against my ribs, which was really discomforting but the heat from his body alone was making me start to sweat.

" Edward, fuck, come on." I whined, trying to plant my hands on the bed so I could move, but the silk sheets made me unable to get a grip.

Finally I just pushed upwards and didn't realize how close we were to the end of the bed when Edward literally fell onto the floor with a huge _thud _that resounded in the room. I covered my hand with my mouth as he sat up with a loud groan.

" What the fuck, Bella!" he yelled.

" You were laying on top of me!"

" So you couldn't just wake me the fuck up? Jesus fucking Christ my back."

" I'm sorry! I didn't think you'd fall over." I said, trying so hard not to laugh, even though it wasn't at all funny.

He glared, " Seriously? Laugh it up. I'll go sleep downstairs."

As he stood up I reached out and grabbed his hand, kneeling on the mattress.

" It's-" I glanced at the clock, " Four in the morning. I'm sorry, you were laying on top of me and I was hot and uncomfortable. You didn't wake up when I tried talking. I'm sorry, baby." I whispered quietly, running my hands over his bare arms, skin warm from sleep and soft blankets.

A hand ran through his messy bed hair and he wrapped right arm around my waist, pushing us down onto the bed and promptly laying on top of me just to get on my nerves.

" I'm sorry for yelling at you. I was just tired from the flight and all the rushing around back in Forks to be packed."

I ran my fingers through his hair, " I should've shaken your shoulder or something, I'm sorry for pushing you off, it was an accident."

Edward rolled onto his back and I laid on his chest, still quietly laughing.

" I love you even though you pushed me off my own bed."

" And I love you, but please don't ever lay on top of me again."

~\\~

In the morning I woke up early to make breakfast. Edward was dead to the world when I'd gotten up so I replaced myself with a pillow and hopped downstairs after putting on a pair of flannel pants and a pullover sweatshirt, adding my fuzzy Christmas socks that Emmett had given me with it as well.

I made blueberry pancakes with bacon and hashbrowns, and the moment the bacon hit the pan I could hear footsteps upstairs and doors opening and closing.

About five minutes later I heard someone descending the stairs and Edward Sr. appeared wearing something basically exact to what Edward wears when he goes to bed, sleep pants and a v-neck t-shirt.

" I must say, Bella, I might get used to your cooking. You'd best stop spoiling me."

I smiled, " I cook for Edward all the time, and I figured it would be nice to have good home-cooked meals."

He shrugged, " I have all this food, I just barely bother to cook. That chili last night was delicious by the way; I finished it up within five minutes."

I put another pancake on a plate and flipped the bacon, and tossed hashbrowns around in the pan. I noticed Edward's dad take a seat at the island on a barstool, looking over the Sunday paper he must have retrieved from the front.

" How's he been doing?" he suddenly asked me.

" Good, really good."

" I worried about him when he moved to Forks. Meeting you has really changed him for the best; it's great to see him so happy; it really is."

I smiled and plated a few crispy pieces of bacon.

" I swear the way that boy talks about you on the phone, he loves you so dearly, Bella. I hope you never forget that. He utterly adores you."

" I don't think I could, I feel the same way about him. He's the best thing to ever happen to me."

Just a moment later Edward appeared in the kitchen, scratching his stomach and yawning loudly.

" Son, can't you put a shirt on?"

" Too much work." he complained, wrapping his arms around me briefly and kissing my temple.

I swatted his hand that reached out for a strip of bacon, " Wait!"

" I'm hungry!"

He reached out again and I smacked him, but then he grabbed me and wrestled with me in front of the plate until he grabbed a piece and shoved it entirely into his mouth. I pinched his stomach and shoved him off.

" You're such an ass!"

" You love me." he said confidently, sitting next to his father who rolled his eyes at him.

Once everything was finished I plated everything and set it on the table. They both immediately started digging in, wasting no time at all.

" This one's a keeper, and if I ever doubted it before..." his father said around a mouthful of pancake.

Apparently they were that good.

We ate breakfast and talked between bites, and when it was finished they insisted on cleaning up the dishes since I cooked, so I went into the living room and sat on the couch, laying one of the throw blankets on my lap.

Edward joined me afterwards, flipping on the television but his dad seemed to have disappeared for a moment before he re-appeared holding two boxes. One was a small, familiar blue box and the other had the coach logo on it with an envelope separately on top of it. Edward was handed the coach box and envelope, and his father handed me the Tiffany blue box with a white bow.

What is with the Masen boys and their love for Tiffany?

I'd never understand.

" Dad, you didn't have to get me anything." Edward started as I nodded my head with him.

" Really, you didn't. I can already tell it's too much."

" Now, Edward, you both had sent me something in the mail for Christmas that was quite ridiculous. Now I'm going to get a drink, either of you want anything?"

We'd gotten him a gift? I looked over at Edward as his dad walked away.

" What did we get him?" I whispered.

" A new office desk. His has been falling apart for years." he explained, opening up the envelope first.

Two ticket shaped items fell out and Edward grabbed them to see what was on them.

" Two tickets to the Art Institute. This is awesome, you'd want to go right, babe?"

I smiled and grabbed the tickets, " Yeah, yeah; that's so cool! Thanks." I said to Edward's father as he walked back in.

Next Edward opened the coach box and revealed a new wallet. It was black with the signature 'C' in their script all over it with a brown leather strip across the corner.

" You're finally at the age where you can get nice things and not ruin them. So don't ruin it." he chuckled as Edward looked through the wallet.

" It's really nice, thanks, dad. You really didn't have to do any of this."

" Yes I did. Now stop being shy, Bella."

I sighed and opened up the box, taking the ribbon off and laying it next to me before taking off the top. Inside was a simple sterling silver chain necklace. A pendent hung from it that had the first initial of my name in it. It was simple and pretty, not overbearing at all.

" Oh, it's so pretty. I love this, thank you."

I reached up to give him a brief hug, " I couldn't very well get you nothing, and woman if not above all love jewelry of any type."

Edward glared at me, " Why is it when I try to buy you jewelry you fight to the death, but when my dad does he gets the accepting version of you. Huh?" he asked in a teasing voice, still glaring.

I rolled my eyes at him and he poked my side, " Trying to tell me something, hm?"

" No!"

" You both are a card. I'm going to get in the shower, maybe afterwards we can head into the city, go to a nice restaurant for dinner?"

I nodded, " Yeah, that'd be great." I said.

Edward agreed and his dad went upstairs as I reached into the box to grab my necklace. I clasped it around my neck and it laid nicely below my collarbone. I felt two arms wrap around me, pulling me to lay on the couch.

I felt familiar scruff scratch against the side of my face, short prickly hairs rough on my skin.

" You need to shave, beard man."

" Do I have to?" he complained.

" Yes. Well, I'm going to go take a shower." I said, rising from the couch.

He groaned, "Can I go first? You take forever."

I glared, " I do not."

" Yes you do. Fucking for-ever."

" Fuck you!" I laughed teasingly before making a break for the stairs.

Edward got caught by surprise, leaving me to get a good running start. When I hit the top of the stairs he got to the bottom and was running up. When I got to the bedroom I shut the door just to buy me a second and then went into the bathroom and locked the door just as I heard a thump against it. The handle shook and I heard Edward groaning.

" I hate you!"

I smiled and turned on the water in the shower, silently glad that I put all my shower things in here last night. After stripping off my clothes I hopped into the shower, letting the hot water cascade over me.

As I was rubbing shampoo through my hair all of a sudden the bathroom door busted open, which I could faintly see through the steamy glass shower door. I gasped and saw Edward standing in front of the shower, and I could faintly see him through foggy glass.

" We have locks for all the doors in this house."

" Seriously? I'm in the fucking shower, Edward. I don't bother you in the shower!"

He ignored me so I continued to wash my hair as I heard the sink turn on. After washing my hair I quickly shaved and started scrubbing my body. I seemed to have gotten distracted because when the cold burst of air hit my skin I almost screamed. Edward closed the door quickly and moved me in front of him as he wet his hair.

" Edward! Your dad is right down the hall!"

" You know how many times I pictured a girl in my shower." he laughed quietly.

I rolled my eyes and he put his arms around me, " Don't be upset. I want you to have a fucking awesome first day in Chicago."

" You're going to smell like a girl." I informed him, the suds on me transferring to him.

He leaned forward to touch his lips to mine, running his hands over my slick back.

" I love you." he said, kissing the spot behind my ear.

" You're a pain in my ass."

When he slipped his hands over my butt I pushed him away and continued to clean the rest of my body before rinsing off my shower loofa. With light touches and sweet kisses he tried to convince me to stay in the shower but I gave him an own taste of his medicine and let him feel the cold air when I opened it.

We got ready quickly and quietly, alternating between being in the bathroom and in the room getting ready since it was a small bathroom. I put on a warm sweater and a pair of skinny jeans, as well as a pair of cream colored socks over my skinny jeans to peek out over my black boots.

Edward put on a v-neck t-shirt, skinny jeans and a flannel plaid shirt over his shirt. I tossed his beanie hat at him and he smiled and set it atop his head.

I shoved my phone into my bag and grabbed my jacket from the closet, where Edward must have hung it yesterday.

" You're awfully quiet." Edward said, stuffing everything in his old wallet into his new one.

I shrugged.

" Not upset at me are you?"

" No, Edward." I assured him, running my fingers through his damp hair.

He wrapped one arm around my waist and I sat on his right leg, leaning my cheek on top of his head.

" You, okay?"

" Mhm."

" Good, because I can't wait to show you around Chicago."

~\\~

I was pretty sure that I was in love.

I mean, maybe it was farfetched and too quick to even go there, but I was convinced.

Chicago is amazing.

Apparently it was absolutely vital for me to see the 'Bean', formally known as Cloud Gate, in Millennium Park. It's a large sculpture made completely out of stainless steel, and basically like huge bean shaped mirror.

It was visually interesting to look at, and Edward had to laugh at the look on my face. It was fucking bizarre, I couldn't help it!

We saw the huge Crown fountain which was a huge black reflective granite slab sticking right up from the ground as I'd like to describe it. The granite was in bricks put together, and unfortunately there was no water coming out of it because it closed in October, but we were still able to see it which was really awesome either way.

Then we went across Nichols Bridgeway that led us close to the Art Institute of Chicago, which I would be seeing on New Year's Day with Edward, and we went past it just to take a look and it was even just awesome to see the buildings all around me. It was different from New York and Seattle.

Edward Sr. showed me the building he's worked in for so many years and they pointed at all the places they went to when Edward was a kid, their favorite restaurants and told me funny stories. It was an experience I'd never forget, that was for sure.

Afterwards we went to Chicago Bagel Authority and enjoyed sandwiches. I got a Ben's Best Sandwich with Turkey, bacon provolone with lettuce and mayo on a bialy bread which was really delicious.

Edward got a veggie sandwich called a La Dolce, to which Edward Sr. laughed at when Edward asked for it and went into a story about a younger Edward in seventh grade.

" There was this girl, and her name was Lucy Finn and she was in his grade; and Edward had such a crush on this girl. Oh, you were so nervous, son, but all you did was talk about this girl as if the sun would rise and fall with her."

I smiled and Edward groaned, " Really, dad?"

" And it was really weird, I noticed that Edward would stop eating any meal that involved meat. So his mom and I would just say it was probably a weird faze he'd go through for a week; but it wasn't. Apparently Edward had talked to her and learned that she was a vegetarian."

I couldn't help but laugh at this, it was really cute to hear Edward would go so far to get a girls attention.

" Well, it took him about three months to gather up courage to talk to her, and he asked me one night to drop him off at the movies and he was going to take her to a movie and get dinner right at this very place."

" Dad." Edward whined.

" So I dropped him off and they went to see a movie, we didn't hear from him for about two and a half hours until he called me in a panic this young man over here. Well, the movie had gone well and then they went to the restaurant, so when they were getting their food Lucy had to use the ladies room so she told Edward she'd eat anything _Vegan_ with sprouts, and Edward here had gotten her a Cheesemonger sandwich, not knowing the difference between a Vegan and a Vegetarian, and when that girl bit into the sandwich she knew something was wrong, isn't that what you said son?"

" This is not even at all funny."

His father continued, laughing, " She went to run to the bathroom and only made it to the trash can to throw up, and then the yelling started...He was devastated for weeks, he sent her flowers and little boxes of vegan chocolates and he even found a recipe on the internet and made her some vegan chocolate mousse. Let's just say there was a mess of chocolate and flower petals on our front door one day and he gave up on her."

I couldn't help it, I burst out laughing. Edward pinched my thigh and glared at me.

" It's not at all funny."

" Yes it is, you poor boy." I giggled, leaning against his side.

" She hated me all of high school."

" How'd you get over it?" I teased.

He shook his head, " I brought a corn-beef sandwich to school every day for a week."

I smiled and he over to kiss my temple. " You're unbelievable."

" Well look at how I had to get you; I knocked you right on your ass."

Edward Sr. looked surprised, " You did not."

" He sure did. Collided right into me and I fell right on my ass on the stairs of Forks High."

He palmed his forehead and shook his head at his son, " She's right son, you really are unbelievable."

Edward grinned.

~\\~

After finishing our late lunch we went to the Field Museum of National History, which was right next to Lake Michigan across the ways. It was a free day today, so we all got in with free admission which was pretty fucking cool.

I'd actually never been to a field museum before so it was really cool to see all the fossils. The most complete one that they have is known as 'Sue' a T-Rex and it was absolutely massive, or she. It was cute to see the little kids running around stop and stare up with wide eyes shining with pure wonder.

Edward held my hand tightly, letting me lean into him as I watched.

We'd seen the big animated display they had of all the ocean life during the Cambrian Period, and Edward seemed to be a little creeped out by it, in fact, all kinds of underwater things seemed to freak him out just a little.

My favorite had been the huge life-size display that they had of a forest from the Carboniferous Period, it reminded me a lot of the monkey exhibits at the zoo, and when I told this to Edward he immediately mentioned that he was going to take me to the Brookfield Zoo.

Apparently the 'best fucking zoo you'd ever go to' according to him, so I went along with it. We saw a taxidermy panda as well at the museum, apparently donated by the zoo and apparently was the first panda ever to have been brought into a zoo; which was pretty cool to learn how they brought the two together.

" Are you enjoying yourself?" Edward asked as we passed a baby mammoth that was discovered only just a year ago in Siberia.

" Yes. Thank you for taking me to all the fun touristy things today. I know you've seen all of it."

He smiled, " I don't care, I want you to enjoy your trip here."

" I love it all already, I can see why you didn't want to leave."

" Yeah?"

" It's so different but in a good way. I like it a lot."

" Good, now come on; there's plenty more to see!"

**Authors Note- I figured for Chicago I'd make things more lighthearted, since Forks was such a drag.**

**Reviews get teasers, they might be a little late because I'm going to have a busy week coming up but I will try my hardest!**


	48. Why Wait

**Authors Note- I know it's been a little while, but I'm sure this will be worth the wait.**

**Disclaimer- S. Meyer owns all things Twilight.**

**Chapter Song- Why Wait by: Rascal Flatts**

~\\~

BPOV

~\\~

I felt completely and entirely dead on my feet by the time we were seated at a table at a restaurant known as Maggiano's, which apparently housed the best linguine with white clam sauce, which I had to admit sounded quiet tasty after such a long day of running around.

After more than two hours at the Field Museum I was shown to Navy Pier, and I also got the see the famous Chicago theatre. It was so cool to see all of the things you hear about in passing, or even see on TV. We went past a few shops, and Edward said he'd take me back here and we'd take a better look inside at everything. The shops along Lake Michigan were really cool and almost cute looking; it would be even more fun to see it during the summer, since it was cold we didn't look too much.

By the time it was around seven we decided to call it a day and get some dinner and then head home to get some rest.

I couldn't believe all the things I'd been able to see in one day and there still was more. Edward wanted to take me to the Zoo and to the Shedd Aquarium, not caring much for the Planetarium but I couldn't blame him; it was probably boring as fuck.

He also wanted to take me to see the Museum of Science and Industry, Grant Park to see the Buckingham fountain and he said that he wanted to show me the building that housed the Grant Park Music Festivals that they have in the summer; even though it's not open. The building is supposedly architecturally cool to look at as he so eloquently put it.

" So, Bella, did you enjoy everything today?"

I nodded, " Yeah, it was amazing. Thanks for enduring it with me." I said with a laugh as he shrugged me off.

Our food had come quickly and I got the linguine with clam sauce, which was absolutely delicious and they have a really generous amount of clams which was even better; I always hated when they skimped on things like that, but they even had the whole clams and shells on the plate, as well as clams already mixed in to add even more.

Delicious.

Edward's dad got the Lobster Carbonara, and Edward himself got the Chicken Francese, which he had let me take a taste of and it was absolutely amazing. Anything on the menu sounded really good, so I shouldn't have been so surprised.

I knew that I would have to savor this meal because Edward mentioned that there wasn't one located in New York, or he'd have probably already taken me there knowing of my love for good pasta.

Once dinner was finished the waiter had come to the table to box everything for us and his dad insisted on paying for dinner, as Edward and I paid for lunch earlier on in the day.

When we had gotten back to the house I lazed upstairs tiredly. Edward said he'd be up soon, but I went up without him. I shut the door behind me as I set my bag down, putting my coat across the bed as well.

I slipped my shoes off and lifted my sweater above my head, following with unzipping my jeans and pushing them down. I traded them in for a pair of plaid flannel pajama bottoms and a tank top. After washing my face and brushing my teeth Edward had returned looking absolutely exhausted. He collapsed on his bed fully clothed and curled up in a ball.

I groaned as I tossed his shoes off for him and unbuttoned his coat. He sat up for me and let me toss it at the end of the bed next to mine. I followed with his shirt afterwards and stopped after undoing his belt. He obnoxiously kicked them off before getting up clad in only boxer briefs and went to brush his teeth. I yawned and rolled over, slithering around on the sheets.

Edward picked up all his clothes as well as mine before turning the TV on and flipping on Friends, understanding my sheer love for that show.

He wrapped his right arm around me when getting into the bed, and I rested my head on his chest as his free arm wrapped a soft blanket around my shoulders.

" We should live here." I said tiredly, nuzzling my nose against his bare chest.

Edward chuckled, " Think so?" he asked, running his fingers through my hair.

" Mhm, I like it, a lot."

" Maybe one day, babe."

I yawned, wrapping my arm tightly around his mid-section as he tucked my head further underneath his chin.

" Yeah, maybe." I said in a quiet whisper before I drifted off.

~\\~

This time when I awoke in bed, I wasn't being suffocated by Edward. Somehow we ended up laying in each other's spots and he was on my right laying on his stomach with his arms curled around a pillow. I stretched my body out before rolling over closer to him, kissing the side of his neck and running my hand down the smooth, bare skin of his back.

His head turned to the side to face me, but he didn't open his eyes or acknowledge my touch. I leaned over to rest my chest against his back, pressing my lips to the nape of his neck. I could finally feel that he was rousing from his sleep, and suddenly I was on my back and he was on top of me.

" What are you doing?" he groaned tiredly into my neck, his knee's on either side of my hips with the blanket tented around us around his waist.

" Waking you up?" I laughed as he blew into my neck.

He collapsed over next to me and I smiled, turning my head towards him.

" I'm so tired. Can't we sleep in today?"

" I guess, Mr. I-Want-To-Show-You-Everything."

One of his eyes peeked open and he glared before reaching one long arm over me to grab his phone. When he saw the time he plopped it right back down.

" It's eight in the fucking morning." he whined, rolling over and taking the entire blanket with him.

I tugged on it and we went back and forth until he almost had me shoved off of the bed. Just as I felt his hands on my sides, tickling me mercilessly, his bedroom door opened and he immediately froze. It felt like I was a kid getting caught by my parents after making out with a boy; if I'd ever been one of those kids.

Edward had shot up like he was a kid getting caught with his hand in the cookie jar before dinner.

" Fuck! Maybe knock first?" he said, grabbing his chest as he sat back on the mattress.

" I just wanted to let you know I'm leaving for work; I probably won't be back until late. Keys to your old car are on the hook, don't do anything crazy."

Edward rolled his eyes in response, " I know, dad."

" Have a good day at work." I added in.

His father glanced at me and then glanced at his disgruntled son, " My sons girlfriend is more polite than my son. You're welcome for offering you transportation, kid."

" Bye, dad." Edward said collectively as he laid back down.

The door shut and he immediately went back to attacking me, and I wiggled around in his arms trying to dodge his hands.

" Stop!" I squealed, quickly hopping out of bed to get away.

I felt his fingers wrap around the string of my pajama pants and tug the tightened knot loose.

" Let's lay in bed for another hour, then I'll take you to breakfast and we can walk around for awhile, hm?" he propositioned.

With him laying shirtless, only in a pair of fitting boxer briefs surrounded by black satin sheets, making his skin look flawless and creamy I honestly couldn't deny the beautiful man infront of me. His bronze hair was in a disarray on top of his head, messy but completely sexy; my fingers tempted to run through the thick strands.

He pulled me forward and I voluntarily curled up against his chest.

" Trying to resist me." he teased with a chuckle, kissing the top of my head.

~\\~

" I feel like you." I teased, sitting on the bench with one leg crossed over the other.

He lit up a cigarette and handed it to me. I put it between my lips and he lifted his camera up to take a picture. When he was finished he sat next to me and I laughed as he showed me the pictures he had taken. Which were one too many.

" Just like you." I stated, remembering that day long ago when I had been face book stalking him secretively.

His arm wrapped around my shoulders, pulling me into his side tightly against the cool Chicago breeze.

" What do you want to do next, hm?" he asked.

We'd already spent half of our day at the Museum of Science and Industry, which I had enjoyed more than I thought I actually would. We took pictures and even ate ice-cream in the old style parlor they have set up in the Museum, which was a fun experience within itself.

After being at the Museum we went out for a quick lunch and then started to walk around taking in the sights around us.

Tomorrow was New Years Eve and people were just about everywhere. I didn't realize that Chicago was a vacation spot for New Years but I was proved wrong. Edward kept his arm closely wrapped around my shoulders not to lose me in the crowds that gathered randomly street to street.

Tonight we were going to the Chicago Art Institute and I was extremely excited to go, it was going to be really fun, or so I have been hoping.

The days spent here with Edward were honestly amazing, I loved Chicago and even more I enjoyed the company of his father as well; of course when he wasn't working. I found that I really connected with his dad and I felt like he was like the father figure in my life that I needed. While I enjoyed my time around the Cullen's, it was nice to walk into the house Edward grew up and feel such a calm atmosphere. Especially when I think about how fucking insane the Cullen house can be at times.

I knew why Edward missed it here so much.

Although I couldn't feel remorse because if he hadn't moved to Forks; we would have never met.

The rest of the afternoon we walked around before heading back to his dad's and I dressed myself up a little more than just my jeans and t-shirt that I'd worn most of the day. I slipped into a pair of dark wash skinny jeans and a thick, but fitting, sweater that was in a cream color. I paired it with some gold sparkly heels and put the pearl earrings Edward gave me in my ears, as well as my bracelet he got me for prom.

Of course when Edward dressed up it just involved putting on a button up over his t-shirt, but this time he instead put on a crisp white button up with a skinny black tie. His shirt was tucked into a pair of dark jeans and a black belt. I also couldn't forget his beloved Italian loafers he saves for certain events. Salvatore Ferragamo of course, only the expensive brand names with hundreds of dollars tacked onto them would be satisfactory.

When we left his father was still not home from work. The only day he was going to have off was New Years Eve, which was tomorrow.

I had twenty times more of a good time then I'd ever thought at the Art Institute, and Edward seemed to be amused as I looked around at all of the beautiful paintings around me as well as other creations on display. Even though some people thought it was just art, I could see the meaning behind it and it was an experience that I'd never take back; especially being there with Edward to hold my hand and follow me from each masterpiece to the next.

It was quite busy, I assumed because it was closing for New Years Eve and Day, so effectively everybody wanted to make an event of it. I was glad that we had been given tickets because the line to buy them outdoors was ridiculous; we'd be frozen before getting a chance to go inside and look around.

Surrounded by beautiful art with an even more beautiful man's arm linked through mine I felt grateful for what I had and knew nothing could ever get as good as they were in that moment.

~\\~

New Years Day

January 1st, 2009

~\\~

Edward had been acting weird all yesterday, and I couldn't even understand why. We had spent New Years Eve with Edward Sr. and I had made the three of us a good dinner and we enjoyed our company; but Edward seemed to be completely and utterly lost in his head that it was fucking ridiculous. I think every word that came out of my mouth ended up with a response of something like ' Sorry, what?', and it was grating on my nerves.

We had went up to his room at around ten at night, and he didn't seem at all interested to ring in the New Year at all, and while I wasn't for all that fluffy shit, it would have been nice to watch the ball drop with him. He'd fallen asleep at eleven, but when I saw the clock hit twelve I knew he had to have been awake because he'd wrapped me up in his arms and whispered how much he loved me, kissing underneath my ear before falling asleep.

I mean fuck, I couldn't even get a real kiss?

We had no plans to really go out anywhere today, and since he was still passed out in bed, considering it's four in the morning, I was hoping that today he wouldn't be acting as weird as yesterday. Since his father was working we were just going to hang out here, but he was insistent on taking me out to dinner tonight; so I was excited about that as long as his mood wouldn't as it was yesterday.

" I can see you thinking hard over there." I heard Edward mumble sleepily.

" Is everything alright?" I whispered.

He drew me in closer to his chest, sighing into my neck, " What do you mean?"

" You were acting weird all day yesterday."

" Just a lot of things on my mind, Bella; it's nothing I promise you."

Somehow I knew it wasn't just 'nothing'. Instead of starting an argument I nodded and turned into his chest, breathing in his scent deeply and accepting that he probably wasn't going to tell me what the fuck was going on in that beautiful head of his; if it was that bad he'd tell me.

Later when I awoke after another attempt of sleep; I knew it was early in the morning a few hours later, but it wasn't the light streaming in through the window that woke me up.

It was yelling.

I hopped out of the bed as quickly as I could, and as quietly, and cracked open Edward's door. I didn't want to step out because I was only wearing a t-shirt and underwear, and his dad seeing me like that would be mortifying, but I still wanted to hear what was going on.

" I can't keep doing this to myself Edward, and I don't expect you to understand!"

" No, I don't fucking understand! You told me, no, you fucking promised me that you wouldn't do this!"

" It's been YEARS, Edward; I can't stay in this house. Every day I walk into it I feel like I am suffocating."

" I'm not asking you to keep living here, I'm asking you to keep it until I graduate."

I heard a loud clank of a glass that made me wince, " Why, Edward, tell me why I have to keep this goddamn house. All this place is, is a reminder of a failed marriage. I walk into this kitchen and remember that your mother won't ever be in there setting dinner on the table so proud of herself."

" I WALK UP THOSE FUCKING STAIRS AND REMEMBER HOW I WAS NOT ENOUGH TO KEEP HER NEXT TO ME WHEN I GO TO SLEEP AT NIGHT!"

" I NEVER FUCKING ASKED YOU FOR ANYTHING, ANYTHING. AND I JUST WANT THIS ONE THING; SOMETHING TO HOLD ON TO AND YOU CAN'T EVEN DO IT?!"

At this point things were getting pretty out of hand. I stepped back into the bedroom and reached for a pair of flannel pants.

" IT'S A HOUSE OF BROKEN MEMORIES, WHY THE FUCK DO YOU WANT IT?!"

" BECAUSE IT'S FUCKING HOME TO ME THAT'S WHY! I didn't fucking know that you and mom were having issues. You dropped a fucking BOMB on me and I was out with mom. I DON'T HAVE BAD MEMORIES HERE! This is the only place I feel at home when I'm not with Bella."

" I can't do this, Edward. I just can't; I'm sorry."

" Don't fucking do this to me."

" YOU THINK YOU KNOW WHAT YOU WANT BUT YOU DONT! YOU'RE JUST A FUCKING KID, EDWARD; A KID!"

" WELL, FUCK YOU!"

I ran down the stairs as quick as I could just as I saw Edward storming down the hallway with murderous eyes, they were dark green; almost pitch black. He tried to walk past me but I grabbed his arms to hold him back and ground him.

" Hey, hey, what's going on?"

Edward Sr. walked down the hallway, looking more composed than Edward even after their yelling match.

" I need to get to work. I'll see you both tomorrow morning. Happy New Year, Bella."

I didn't get a chance to respond before he had shut the door behind him and the house was quiet. Edward sat down on the stairs and leaned forward with his head in his hands, tugging and gripping his hair so tightly it looked painful.

" Edward what's going on?"

" He wants to sell the house."

I'd already gotten the gist of the situation, but I didn't want him to think that I was at all listening in on their conversation. Even though I was sure the fucking neighbors even knew about the situation at how loud they had been screaming.

" He told me that he'd keep the house until it could be put in my name, he said he'd let me after I graduated. It's already paid off and everything; all he does it pay for the electric, water and whatever the fuck else along with taxes; which isn't a big deal. But now he wants to sell it. The plan was after I graduated he'd keep the house in his name for two years and I'd make all the payments on it until I have a steady job so that when we switch the names on the house I'll be basically qualified and esablished for it, even though as a lawyer himself it wouldn't make a difference much otherwise."

I could completely understand where Edward was coming from, but as I stood in front of him; I wondered if he actually thought all of this plan through now that he was with me. Now assuming we were going to be living in Chicago, and while I did love it here I wasn't sure if that big of a decision should be made now.

" Are we assuming that after we graduate we'd be living here in Chicago?"

" We'll live where you want to live, Bella. I just want this house in my name. I'm not going to lie, at one point all I thought about was getting married and raising my kids here; giving them the childhood I had. Even though we can't have kids, I still want to be here anyways. It holds so many amazing memories that I just can't let go."

I kneeled in front of him and grabbed his hands, pressing my lips to them.

" Edward, maybe it's not letting go, but moving on. Baby, I know how much you love this house and how much it means to you; but maybe a new family can make memories here. Some other little boy can love it here like you used to."

He clenched his hand and let out a deep sigh, " He promised me."

" I think you need to look at how this house makes him feel, Edward." I said gently.

" I know."

When I wrapped my arms around his neck I felt his face bury in my shoulder. He squeezed me tightly around the waist before standing and bringing me with him until my feet were off the ground and I was airborne.

" Today is supposed to be a good day." he sighed, " Fuck the rest of this."

~\\~

I could tell that most of the day Edward was seemingly lost in himself. Something about him seemed almost like nervous tension and I was trying to bring it out of him but to no avail. At around four I decided to hop in the shower and get ready. I decided to wear a simple black dress. The bodice was very fitting with a sweetheart neckline, and it flowed out from my waist in a soft fabric that went a few inches above my knee. It had one inch straps, and the back of it was open with the fabric criss-crossing a few times for added detail. I wore my same gold heels I had worn the other night and put my things in a small clutch to carry around.

My hair was in wispy curls down my back and my makeup was dark and smoked out and I put on a nude colored lipstick so it wouldn't take away from my outfit or makeup.

Edward was dressed to the nine's. He had on a pair of dark slacks that fit him perfectly, and a suit jacket that matched and showed his trim figure. Underneath he wore a white button up that was left with a few undone buttons, his belt was black and shining, matching the expensive shoes he wore. He went as far to even wear cologne, and I wondered where he was taking me with how he was dressing.

When we got into the car Edward told me we were going to an American/French restaurant, and while I was wary about eating French food, considering they eat shit like snails; I knew Edward wouldn't take me to a place knowing I wouldn't find a few things that sounded good.

We pulled up to the Trump hotel and my eyes widened at the unique structure. It was completely made out of reflective glass, and it was visually astounding and definitely about as big as a few of the towers in the surrounding city.

A valet parked our car and when I stepped out I was surrounded by a grand entrance. Everything was in gold and shining so brightly that it almost hurt my eyes. The way the city lights glimmered on the building left me in pure awe. It was two streets away from Lake Michigan and it was honestly amazing. I couldn't believe that he'd taken me here to eat dinner, it was too much; not to Edward of course..

We went up to the Sixteenth floor and were met with Restaurant Sixteen, Edward smoothly told the man of our reservations and we walked into a beautiful dining room. Our seats were right next to the glass walls and we had an absolutely gorgeous view of the city and lake before us.

" Edward." I breathed," This is amazing."

" I'm glad that you are already enjoying yourself, love."

We were seated and the waitress handed us our menu's and told us of all the specials for the day. We ordered our drinks and she had quickly returned with them before giving us a minute to look over the menu.

" Edward, no matter what we get the bill is going to be over hundred dollars for just both of us." I whispered.

" I know."

" Holy shit they have octopus on here."

He chuckled, " Bella."

" Sea Scallops or Alaskan Halibut?"

" Either which one you want is fine, darling."

" Whatever you say, honey." I dished back with a smirk.

By the time the waitress came back we knew what we wanted. I got the Alaskan Halibut with Cilantro, and Edward got the Sea bass, hold the octopuses. I was a little wary about the food but I trusted him not to take me to a place so nice with disgusting overpriced food. I was a simple girl, give me a slice of cheese pizza and I would be just as, or more than, pleased.

When she left, we both fell silent and it almost felt awkward. I reached over the table for Edward's hand and linked my fingers through his.

" What are you thinking about?"

He gave me a half smile, " You."

" What about me?"

" Just how much I love you, and how happy I am to be able to spend today with you."

I smiled, teeth and all, " I love you, too."

" Beautiful girl."

" Kiss up."

He rolled his eyes and smirked at me playfully.

When our meal came and was set in front of us, I was starving and it smelled really good. The portions were perfect and I honestly knew I'd eat every single bit of this. I took a heaping bite of the fish with the squash and almost moaned at the flavor.

Go fucking French food. Who've known it was so incredible good.

" This is amazing." I said, taking another bite of my fish.

Edward let me taste some of his sea bass, and I let him try some of mine. I definitely wanted to come back here and try more of the daring food items on the list, everything had a certain flavor to it that was unique and very enjoyable.

I was scrapping my fork on my plate when I was done, not wanting to waste anything before leaning back with a sigh and taking a drink of my water.

" That was delicious."

Edward wiped his mouth and nodded in agreement, " Definitely. I'll have to take you here again, hm?"

" Oh, yeah."

We shared light conversation as the waitress took our plates and offered up dessert, which I was definitely going to take part in. I got the Gianduja Cremeux as well as a cup of coffee, and Edward got coffee with the Yuzo Custard.

The dessert was just as tasty as the meal, and I took my time to savor each bite of it.

" Thank you for dinner tonight, Edward." I said, " Honestly, this entire night has been amazing."

" I only want to give you the best. I want to treat you to nice dinner's every once in awhile. You just barely let me." He said with a small smile at the end.

When we finished dessert Edward paid for the meal, not allowing me to see the price of anything before he slid in a few bills and sent it off with our waitress.

As we were heading downstairs I could still sense the nervous feeling coming off of Edward as I did earlier in the night. When we got downstairs we went outside, and instead of going in the direction of the car; we were walking towards the streets.

Surprisingly, it wasn't absolutely freezing tonight and my jacket kept me nice and warm. As we walked down a few streets I noticed he was taking me towards Lake Michigan, we ended up just towards the back of the hotel and leaning against a railing that led out.

The lights of the city shone onto the trembling waters and created a beautiful scene in front of me. There were a few people looking on towards the Lake as well, and the gold lights lit up the pavement, even the street lamps weren't necessary.

Tonight had been perfect even with the day starting out as a disaster. It was the simple things, such as going out to dinner, with Edward that made me love him all the more. Being able to have that person in my life to always be there to talk to or be there with the drop of a hat was something I'd always hoped to find.

I turned towards him just as I saw his mouth open, and he closed it quickly and looked away.

" What is up with you?" I asked with a quiet chuckle, wrapping my arms around him and resting my head on his chest, nuzzling the soft fabric of his coat and smelling his rich, deep scent. I could feel his heart thumping wildly even through the layers he wore. When I looked up at him he captured my lips in a soft kiss, running his fingers through my long hair before pulling away abruptly.

" Edwa-"

In front of me he grabbed both of my hands before bending himself down on one knee down on the hard pavement. His hands were shaking slightly, and I knew it wasn't from the cold and I felt my breath catch in my throat as one of his hands retreated to grab something from his pocket as he knelt

" I told myself that I wouldn't ever settle until I found a woman who loved and adored me just as I did her. Moving to Forks was the best thing that happened to me; even when it didn't seem like it at the time. But I've realized that it doesn't matter where I go or what I do; you are home to me, Bella. I know we're young, and this is probably insane but Isabella Swan, would you do the extraordinary honor of marrying me?"

**Authors Note- Hey, guys, so I know it's been awhile but as I said on Twitter, I was going to update this weekend; cheers to that! I'm trying not to let my personal life effect my FF life but unfortunetly they can mix at times and I just don't have the time, nor the mindset, to write and edit. Thank you all for being patient, and I hope you know even if I can't get teasers out; I do read every single review and I appreciate every one of them; I re-read them to give me the energy to write for you guys =D**

**So REVIEWS may get TEASERS, I am going to try my hardest to get them out. And the next chapter wont be a wait over two weeks. Love you all.**


	49. Everything Has Changed

**Authors Note- I know it seems like forever, and I know…No teasers were given out but I've been extremely bust with class, work and other personal health things that I have been dealing with it's so hard, but I am finding time to read all of your reviews I promise. I hope you guys understand and I hope this chapter was worth the wait.**

**Disclaimer- S. Meyer owns all things Twilight.**

**Chapter Song- Everything Has Changed by: Taylor Swift**

~\\~

BPOV

~\\~

I couldn't breathe, and I wasn't sure if it was because of the sudden cold breeze or if it was the man in front of shocking me with the words falling from his beautiful, ruby lips. One hand stayed linked with his and the other hung at my side limp, while his other hand held a beautiful ring box, opened and displaying a beautiful ring inside that took my breath away.

As I gazed at the ring it looked familiar to me, and immediately I remembered it as the ring that Jessica and I had saw when I picked up the watch I had gotten Edward for his Birthday over a year ago. I couldn't believe that it was this ring, and it was as beautiful as I remembered. I wondered if he had either asked Jess if something had caught my eye, or if this was purely ironic.

Unlike the one in the display case that I had seen, this one had a diamond band instead of a regular platinum band, and the diamond in the middle was their signature Lucinda diamond with two triangle ones on either side of it which added even more sparkle. I couldn't believe that this ring was in front of me, and it sparkled in the lights.

Edward still was on his knee, looking anxious and I knew I had to speak before he completely lost it. My eyes started to water and I didn't even try to wipe at them as I gazed at him.

The words were easy, and I knew there was no doubt in my mind of what to say. A tear rolled down my cheek and I clasped the hand of his tightly and nodded.

" Yes, Yes, I will marry you."

His beautiful green eyes shimmered as he used a steady hand to take the ring out of the box. He slipped my promise ring off my left hand and instead moved it to my fourth finger on my right. When I felt the beautiful diamond ring slide onto my ring finger I couldn't help the small sound that escaped me. It was dainty, yet it made a statement on my hand and I couldn't help but stare it at.

Edward stood and took me into his arms, pressing his lips hotly against mine and I could feel him smiling against my lips.

" This is crazy." I told him when he pulled away, resting his forehead against mine.

" I've been carrying that ring around since right before your accident."

It had been purely coincidence that he had picked the ring that I had looked twice at, and I couldn't believe the irony. And I couldn't believe that he had an engagement ring waiting for me for so long

" When Jess and I had picked up your watch that day I saw this ring, it didn't have a diamond band but I thought it was beautiful."

" Seriously?"

I nodded, " Yeah."

" I had my mom come out and help me with it. Do you really love it? We can always get a different one."

" No, no. This one is absolutely perfect. I can't believe this. Oh my god."

He kissed me again, lifting me up in his arms as he did. My hands rested on either side of his face; holding him as close as I could.

" I love you so much." I confounded, kissing his lips, his jaw and anywhere else I could reach.

" I was hoping if tonight went well we could stay in the room I got for us tonight at the hotel."

Why the fuck were we wasting any more time out in the cold?

He set me down on the ground, letting me get to my bearings on these tall heels and I tugged his hand with me.

" Then what are we doing here still?" I breathed as he gave into my pulling.

We kissed and stumbled and ran and tripped with fumbling fingers and trembling cold legs. In those magical pockets of his Edward had a room key and we had found ourselves in an elevator next to an old man who was looking at us like we were insane; as if the smiles on our faces gave everything away. We probably looked insane.

My thoughts were scrambled and my eyes went from beautiful green to sparkling diamonds. When we got to our floor Edward picked me up and I gripped him tightly, giggling, as he went down a long hallway before stopping at a door.

I'd never gotten the chance to take in the room around me, but it was absolutely beautiful with floor to ceiling windows. I could see a flash of the Chicago Clock Tower, or Clock Tower Cafe, in the huge window across from the bed before I was caught up in Edward.

I pushed his jacket off his shoulders and threw it somewhere in the room, and mine soon followed after Edward's. Since he had more layers covering his body I started to pull at his button up shirt. I tugged it out of his pants and unbuttoned it; leaving it hanging open on both sides as my hands went to his belt.

His lips were on my neck, sucking and licking the skin before placing small crescent shaped bite marks on my collarbone. I tore his belt off while his hands finished taking off the rest of his shirt. Edward leaned back on his haunches, running his hand down my left calf before grabbing my ankle and slipping my shoe off, doing the same with the other and placing a light kiss on the inside of my ankle before letting it rest next to him.

The white undershirt he wore was gone within second of his body being pressed up against mine again. Our lips met, hot and passionate and I didn't want to pull away. I wrapped my arms around him, tracing small patterns on his lower back as we kissed.

" You taste like chocolate." he hummed, tangling his tongue with mine, as I could taste a hint of lemon mixed with his sweet breath.

One of his hands wedged between my back and the soft mattress I lay on, lifting me up carefully towards him. The zipper on my back was almost three inches, and he pulled the zipper down of the dress before helping me slip it off of my body. I put my arms around his neck and brought our lips back together. His fingers ran through my hair, alternating between twisting the ends of it and massaging the bare skin of my back before laying me back down on the bed.

Slowly I unzipped his slacks and pushed them down, letting him kick them the rest of the way off as he removed his socks.

He touched the side of my cheek and I leaned into his touch, my eyelids closing at his warm touch

" I love you so much."

I looked up at him and smiled, " I love you, too, Edward. "

Our frenzied pace slowed as we kissed languidly. His hands moved over my upper body whilst I ran mine up and down his back, reveling in the smooth skin; warm and firm against my touch.

When we were bare for each other Edward drew up the blankets over our lower half and kissed my neck as our bodies met together. I gripped his shoulders and buried my face in the place between his neck and shoulder, my body feeling a light with pleasure and pure fire.

Our movements were beautiful and raw with emotion, and Edward's face was drawn with unadulterated passion.

And I'd never forget it for anything.

~\\~

At some point Edward had turned off the lamps that were lit on either side of the bed when my body was limp and unmoving. I rolled over to face the large floor to ceiling glass window and stared outside at the beautiful lights. My lips let out a contented sigh as Edward wrapped his arms around me from behind and kissed between my shoulder blades with swollen, overly kissed lips.

I felt like a flaccid noodle, all the energy sucked out of me as my eyes gazed outside lazily.

" You're so beautiful." Edward murmured, kissing underneath my ear and running his hand over the side of my waist and down towards my hip.

" So are you."

I grasped his hand in mine and pulled it to my chest over my heart, bending my head down to kiss his fingers.

He scooted back behind me and pushed me to lay on my back, exposing my upper half with a sleepy smirk. I grabbed the sheet and rolled my eyes loosely at him, pulling it over to cover myself. With little energy, he shifted to the other side of me and pulled me up to rest on his chest, taking my left hand and gazing at the ring that adorned it now.

I snuggled into his neck as his arm wrapped around my waist and drifted off to sleep within second.

~\\~

When I awoke in the morning I stretched my body out and felt my muscles slightly sore from all the activity of last night. With a sigh I rolled over and clutched a pillow to me while pulling the comforter up to cover my waist. I peeked open my eyes and saw that Edward was not in the bed with me, but there was a single rose on his pillow. I reached out to grab it and smiled when I saw the ring on my finger.

Engaged.

Bella Swan is fucking engaged.

_I _am fucking engaged.

Just as I sat up the door to the hotel room opened and Edward stood in fresh clothes holding coffee and a bag of something from starbucks. Upon seeing me awake a radiant smile spread over his face and he stepped over to the section of the room that held the bedroom, and I didn't even know what the rest of the room looked like. All I knew was that if this was just a single room in this gorgeous hotel, what did the fucking penthouse apartments look like?

He got up on the bed and handed me a travel cup of coffee. I leaned back against the pillows and sighed as I took a sip of the peppermint mocha.

" Did you just wake up?" he asked, leaning over to kiss my forehead.

" Mhm. Thank you for the coffee."

He handed me a blueberry scone and we ate and drank coffee in bed in comfortable silence. When our stomachs were full and coffee cups were empty Edward rolled us over on the bed so he was on top of me, kissing me passionately as if he couldn't get enough.

" Edward." I giggled as he started to undress himself.

He paused with a smirk, " What?"

" You are simple insatiable, aren't you?"

" Am I not allowed to ravish my fiancé anytime I please?"

I laughed at his tone, and my stomach fluttered at the word 'fiancé'.

" I think that was the most elegant thing I've ever heard you say."

" I want to fu-"

" Okay, okay; don't get completely crass how."

" Fuck." he finished with a teasing smile before kissing me again.

When I got him on his back I laid on top of him and linked our hands together, a smile lighting up my face as I leaned down to give him a chaste kiss.

He had a weird look on his face, " I feel kind of...emasculated."

" I'm a naked woman lying on you, how do you feel emasculated?"

" I don't know, I'm just used to being the one on top during situations like this."

I rolled my eyes on him and pressed myself further against him, making him groan deeply; a rumble in his chest.

" Still feel that way."

" Do that again and I think I'll forget all about this conversation."

About a half hour later I pealed myself off of Edward, and he let me know that he had a bag of clothes here for me yesterday. Of course no matter how nervous he was, the presumptuous side to him shone through.

I took a shower to wipe the grime off of my body, and the bathrooms were absolutely huge in here. The shampoo they provided also wasn't bad at all, it was fucking raspberry scented.

When I stepped out of the shower I immediately felt much cleaner. I dried off quickly and wrapped my hair in the towel as I dressed and opened up the bathroom door to let the steam out. Edward had brought me the simple essentials as well as a pair of jeans and a long sleeve shirt with a flannel. I was glad he wasn't the type of boyfriend to bring me a dress or a skirt.

I caught myself using the word boyfriend and had to fight a smile at the word 'fiancé' because I didn't want to be one of _those _girls.

I used the little blow drier and actually found a comb and a brush in a clear package in one of the drawers to use on my hair. Once I was finished I used the makeup in my clutch for my face, just a quick concealer, eyeliner and mascara and I was good.

I ventured my way beyond the bedroom section and saw a small little sitting room with a huge flat screen and a nice table in the corner against the glass wall. Edward was lounging on the couch watching a movie and I walked over and sat next to him, resting my head on his shoulder.

" All ready to go?" he asked.

" Yeah."

The television flipped off and he stood, bringing me with him. I didn't want to break out of our little bubble; I wanted to stay wrapped up in his arms and warm sheets forever.

" What about your dad?" I asked him curiously as I pulled on the shoes Edward had brought for me.

" I talked to him this morning. Everything's fine."

" What do you mean fine?"

He groaned and wrapped his arms around me, " Fine, like, how about we talk about all that shit later and relish in this bliss."

I smile, " Did you tell your dad?"

" Yes, and I called my mom. She was screaming over the phone with Alice."

" I can picture them freaking out."

" Are you going to tell your mom?"

I nodded, " Yeah, I'll call her."

" Have you spoken to her at all?"

" She e-mailed me for Christmas."

He didn't ask me anymore questions and we headed downstairs to check-out before leaving. Tomorrow we were going to be heading back to New York, so we had one last day here in Chicago with his dad. I was sad to leave but at the same time itching to be back home in our apartment together.

When he had gotten back there was a round of congratulations from Edward Sr. when we stepped through the door. I was surprised he wasn't at work but he said he took a short day and left at around twelve, and we'd gotten back at around one.

Since we didn't eat a big breakfast the three of us went out to lunch and luckily there was no awkwardness between Edward and his father; I wondered what kind of agreement they had come to because Edward didn't seem to be in a bad mood.

The entire day I couldn't seem to wipe the smile off my face, and Edward seemed the same as he kept me tucked into his side. It was going to be nice laying around in our apartment for a few days, nothing to do with just the two of us for awhile until school would start up again and we'd back to reality.

When we had gotten home around dinner time I was planning on making dinner. Edward was upstairs grabbing his laptop, and his father was in the living room watching TV and relaxing as I picked up my phone to call my mom.

She picked up on the first ring.

" Bella! How are you, honey?"

" Hi, mom; I'm doing good. How are you?"

" I'm great, baby, I'm just so happy to hear from you."

Tears started to well up my eyes and immediately I was ridden with guilt. I knew she wasn't trying to make me feel bad, but we both knew that I had been completely ignoring her; and while it was because I'd been angry; I missed talking to my mom. She had been constant in my life even when they divorced, even though she lied to me.

I walked out the backdoor onto the porch and shut it behind me.

" I'm sorry I haven't called you in awhile."

" Oh, are you crying? Bella, don't cry; it's okay. I know you have your reasons, Bella."

" I saw him."

She paused, " Him? Who are you talking about?"

" My dad, I saw him on Christmas. He wanted to talk to me but I couldn't."

" Where'd you see him, honey?"

" At dinner when I was with Edward and the Cullen's and a few of their friends."

" I'm sure he understands. He's always had the utmost respect for you, Bella."

I took in a deep shuddering breath and wrapped my arm around me in false hopes of keeping warm in this freezing weather.

" I look just like him." I said quietly, wiping the tears on my face.

I heard her sigh, " You do, baby, every day I saw him more and more in you."

" How could you do that to dad?" I asked her.

" Honey, we were having problems for a long time; and I know that is no excuse. But we started to resent each other for what had happened. He couldn't look past the fact that you weren't his."

" I miss you."

" Oh, I miss you, too, Bella. I promise I will try to come up and see you in New York whenever I can, okay? How was your New Years? Is Edward doing well?"

I smiled with tears on my face as I looked down at my ring.

" He's really great...He actually...He proposed to me last night."

She gasped, " He did?!"

I nodded, even though she couldn't see me, " I told him yes."

" I'm so happy for you, Bella. He's so good for you; you deserve a good man like that."

" We're in Chicago right now visiting his dad, we're going back to New York tomorrow."

" Are you guys making plans for dates? Or venue's, oh, I have to help you pick out a dress!"

I smiled at her sudden excitement, " We haven't really talked about it but I want to wait a year, maybe until we graduate...You aren't mad that I'm engaged at nineteen?"

" I know you, Bella. And I know that, that man absolutely adores you. You aren't your father and I, Bella."

Biting my lip I knew she was right, " Yeah...but I gotta go. I'm making dinner so I'll talk to you later?"

" Of course, sweetheart. I'll call you soon, okay?"

" Okay...I love you."

" I love you, too."

We hung up the phone and I rushed inside, immediately being warmed up by the heat. It was absolutely freezing outside and Edward's head snapped over towards me as he sat on the couch in the living room. He set his laptop aside and came into the kitchen as I was taking beef out of the fridge.

" Hey, what were you doing in the cold?" he asked, wrapping his arms around me to warm me.

" Talking to my mom." I said, " She was really excited."

" Yeah?"

I nodded, " Already talking about wedding dresses."

He chuckled and kissed my neck, " You in a wedding dress is quite the concept."

" I'll wear a black wedding dress."

" My mother would be horrified."

I turned around and leaned up to kiss him on the lips. He smiled against them and tightened his arms around my waist.

" I can't wait to plan a wedding with you." he said after pulling away.

" Me either. But I'd better start on dinner..."

He placed a long kiss on my lips before leaving the kitchen.

For dinner I made a beef and vegetable stew that Edward and his father both had multiple servings at the table. I'd never seen two grown men eat so much food, and I definitely found out where Edward had gotten his ridiculous appetite from; it still didn't explain how he's as skinny as a street lamp pole.

Afterwards we headed off to bed early. I was tired after the lack of sleep I'd gotten last night; so curling up in his silk sheets felt so nice and comfortable. Almost immediately I fell asleep and it felt almost too soon that Edward was waking me up telling me I had ten minutes until I had to start getting ready.

I dragged myself in the shower and dressed in a t-shirt and jeans with my combat boots. I blindly packed all my things in my bags while Edward laughed at my exhaustion. I had no idea why I was so fucking tired but the second we'd get back home I was sleeping for days.

Downstairs Edward's dad was waiting for us to take us to O'Hare. It had only taken us about an hour to get all of our clothes and things packed in our bags, but I figured that it was pretty good timing for how tired I was. The drive to the airport seemed very quick, and before we heading towards security to get our bags all checked out and having them fucking violate our clothes, we said goodbye to Edward's dad.

I knew that Edward was a little sad to leave, but he put on a smile as he said goodbye to his father. After giving him a quick embrace I thanked him for letting me tag along, and after giving our final goodbye's we headed off to get everything checked and approved.

Our flight was at eight fifty, and we only had to wait ten minutes in uncomfortable chairs until we were getting on the plane to head home. I slept through most of the trip and Edward had to wake me when we landed. A cab was going to be taking us to our apartment and I'd honestly never been so happy to see home.

When we walked inside everything was just as we had left it, and Edward set all of our bags in the bedroom before face planting the bed spread eagle. I tossed my jacket at him that was covered in cold snow. It was lightly snowing outside and it was also ten times colder here than in Chicago it felt like; and the harsh cold breeze didn't feel at all welcoming.

" Stop hogging the bed." I complained as I sat at the edge and slipped my shoes off.

" We should really unpack."

" Unpacking is for people who care. And I really just don't care."

I laid down on our bed and sighed deeply; missing our fluffy pillow top bed and warm fleece sheets that we had bought specifically for the winter. I took my hair out of its ponytail and curled up in a ball to take a nice nap.

~\\~

My nap had turned into a ten and a half hour rest that was interrupted at 11PM and the sound of Edward moving around the room putting things away. I sat up in bed and ran my fingers through my hair with a loud yawn.

" Hey, sleep good?" he asked.

" Yeah...I think so."

He chuckled and grabbed a charging cord from my purse. " There's pizza in the kitchen if you're hungry. It's only been there two hours."

" Okay." I sighed, resting my head on the pillow and watching him move around in just a pair of black fleece pants, marveling at his smooth ivory skin that was exposed of his chest.

" Would you like me to get some for you?"

" Yeah."

Two minutes later he returned with a plate of pizza and a can of coke. I sat up in bed and grabbed it from him, receiving a kiss on the forehead with it. I polished off all four pieces and the coke before laying flat on the bed with a sigh.

Edward continued to go around the room and into the bathroom putting everything away. He even went as far to put my clothes in drawers and in the closet for me. I finally got up and went to clean up my plate and glass, and I had gotten a drink for Edward when I went back. He had taken his place on my bed and I gave him the glass of water before resuming what he had been doing before.

" So what kind of wedding do you want?" he asked.

" Uhm...Do you mean season wise or are we talking theme's. Personally, I think it would be kick ass to have a TMNT theme. Everybody can have different colored eye mask ties to go around their heads. We can just cut holes for the eyes."

He laughed heartily, " Bella, I'm being serious."

" I was never the little girl who sat in her room planning her wedding, Edward."

" Trust me, I know."

I threw a glare at him and he smirked.

" What kind of wedding do _you _want?"

" No church."

I nodded in agreement, " No church, I agree."

" My mom won't like it; but I don't belong in a church."

He traced the pattern of the blanket next to him and thought for a moment.

" I've always wanted to be married in the fall. It's not hot, it's not cold and it's not pouring rain."

" That sounds fine. So you want it outside?"

" Maybe. You don't sound very enthusiastic."

I glanced over at him and went over to sit on the bed next to him. He took my left hand and placed a kiss on my palm.

I didn't want him to think I wasn't excited about this, I just felt so weird and out of place with all of this. Never had I been the little girl to make plans of my wedding dress or all those special little details those other little girls had planned out by the time they were sixteen years old. It wasn't that I didn't want to get married and plan a wedding; I guess a small part of me was just a little scared.

" Edward I want to plan our wedding...I guess I'm just a little scared."

" What do you mean?"

" What if we end up like my parents, or even yours?"

He shook his head, " Bella, are you having a kid that isn't mine?"

I glared, " No."

" Then don't worry about it."

" I want to wait a year."

There was no arguing or conflict in his eyes, " Okay."

" Yeah?"

" How about sometime in October 2010? In a year it'll be early 2010, and we can start making plans then. Right now we can just enjoy being engaged for awhile, no rushing."

I nodded, " I like that."

Edward sat up and kissed my nose, " Okay. It's a plan."

" Is that okay? I don't want to-"

" I'm not going to rush us if you aren't ready yet. The fact that you said yes to marry me makes me the happiest man alive."

" I just want you to tell me what you want, too."

" I want whatever makes you happiest."

" Okay." I sighed before sitting up and grabbing my purse. I took my phone out and put it on the charger and then went to change into a pair of shorts and a tank top to be more comfortable. I finished putting away all of our clothes and started a load in the wash for a few things that we had worn yesterday that didn't have time to be washed, and then I put in our clothes from today.

After setting our laptops in the living room where they were usually kept, I finished emptying the rest of the things in the suitcases before pushing them underneath the bed. Edward was already passed out asleep, tangled in the sheets with his arm above his head and the other on his stomach.

I gazed at him for a moment before retreating to the bathroom to wash my face and brush my teeth. I made sure the front door was locked up before going into our bedroom and turning the lights off. As I crawled into bed next to Edward, I rested my head on his chest. His chest rose and fell evenly, his heart beat thumping in time.

I knew that I was the luckiest girl in that moment; to have someone so incredible who loves and adores me just as much as I do them. There was no way that I could ever express how grateful I was for Edward. He's my everything; I wouldn't change that for the world.

**Authors Note- A little fluffy, and next chapter is going to be pretty fun as well. I hope you enjoyed this, and leave a review if you so please. Thanks for reading.**


	50. Good Riddance

**Authors Note- It's crazy that we are now at Chapter 50! Happy Hallows Eve to all who celebrate - I hope this short, fluffy little chapter is to your liking before, of course, more drama pours in.**

**Disclaimer- S. Meyer owns all things Twilight.**

**Chapter Song- Green Day: Good Riddance**

~\\~

BPOV

~\\~

" My god I feel like I haven't seen you in forever." he breathed, holding me closely to him.

I smiled, " I know, I know. How are you? How's school tell me everything!"

James pulled away and ran his fingers through his short spiky dark blonde hair. He looked different from when I'd seen him last, more matured. Figure that shit. I guess we'd both really grown up from who were in high school, but somewhere inside we were still those crazy kids who did crazy shit and still thought it was fucking hilarious.

" What am I, chopped liver?! Get your ass over here, Swan!"

Two arms wrapped around me and lifted me up off the ground before I could open my mouth. I squealed as he pinched my sides and turned me to face him; laying his beautiful, soft lips on mine before pulling away and kissing all over my face, nose, and chin, forehead and both of my cheeks.

" Goddamn, I missed you." Edward sighed, burying his face in my neck and kissing me there.

" I missed you, too. How was California?"

" You'd probably love it." Edward said, wrapping his arm around my waist. " How's your mom doing?"

" Really good, Phil has been busy with practice so we basically spent every day out or at the beach."

He kissed the top of my head, " You got a nice tan."

" The naked beaches in Florida _are _nice."

Edward's eyes were fire and I laughed and walked ahead of him, feeling his hand connect with my ass with a loud _smack._ I yelped and wrapped my arm around James' as we went to baggage claim to get their luggage.

James was in California now going to UCLA to finish up college there. He was deciding to get a degree in Social Working focusing on Mental Health and Substance Abuse. He wanted to work with people through therapy and helping them with their problems. I thought that it was amazing that he wanted to do that. I knew that some people would think it was hypocritical considering James had been around the block and has experimented with drugs, but since he was done with that he wanted to help people with addiction.

Soon I was going to be finishing my next semester of school, and by December I was going to be finished with my two years, while Edward was starting up his third year at Julliard. It was incredible how much time had gone by. It was flying so fucking fast and so much had changed.

Since Edward and I have been engaged I'd reached out more to talk to my mother more and starting to deal with the fact that I couldn't change the past. There was nothing I could do to change the fact that Charlie wasn't my father, and the fact that they'd both lied to me my entire life.

I knew it was something that was going to be a slow heal, but when the end of the summer came around I had decided to go down to Florida to go see my mom since she'd never gotten the chance to get up to New York.

Edward and I didn't spend our entire summer in Forks, although we'd spent about three weeks there. Alice was getting ready to head off to UW, and Esme and Carlisle, were feeling pretty sad that she was going to be gone and the house would be even emptier; but they were proud at her for getting a full academic scholarship, meaning she'd gotten a free ride in although the Cullen's could pay for it.

I hadn't seen Charlie, or Sue and not even Leah. Esme said that she'd see Sue around town, but it seemed as if to them I no longer existed.

It was sad. And it hurt me more than I'd thought. A part of me couldn't believe it, until I'd made a run to the store with Alice and Sue had walked past me as if she hadn't seen me at all. I spent a few nights crying in Edward's arms, and others angrier than I could imagine but if Charlie wanted to be a coward than he could do as he pleased. He'd spewed all of my mother's dirty secrets and then ran away; it is what it is.

After spending those few weeks in Forks, Edward and I had parted ways as I'd gone to Florida to visit my mother and Edward had gone to California to see James. Then they were both going to come to New York and James was going to spend a week here until he classes at UCLA were starting.

I'd had such a good time with mom, and it was great to be able to spend some time with just her and me for those ten days, even though I missed Edward like hell. She gushed over my engagement ring and was pushing wedding details but Edward and I had barely delved into any major details.

The beginning of summer we had moved out of the apartment we had been staying in. The rent on the apartment had sky-rocketed because of all the people in the area had been grabbing up the apartments in the building like crazy. We'd never dealt with the rent because Esme and Carlisle had been taking care of it, and the bills were sent to them; but we they had gotten a mix up and we were sent all of the bills and saw how much it had rose a couple hundred; which was ridiculous.

We both appreciated them offering to let us stay there, in fact Esme had been arguing on the phone with Edward non-stop for a week until he said we were leaving and that was final. I loved the apartment, I really did; but for the price I knew Edward and I could find something better.

Close in the area of our old place and only a few minutes each from both of our apartments, Edward and I had found the cutest brownstone home; and I couldn't lie and say I'd never dreamed of living in one of them. It was a three bedroom and two bathrooms with the price that was more than half of the apartment we had been in. We of course still had our same furniture, so we'd decorated and painted the house all summer to make everything go together.

Alice and Jasper had come to visit us the beginning of summer to help out, and of course Alice had wanted to go shopping for days and days, but on the days that I was working; Jasper was able to help Edward out at the house so he wasn't alone.

Although Edward told me that I didn't need a job, I still wanted to go out and apply to places. I loved having extra time to spend with Edward, but there was a part of me that felt satisfied at the end of a Friday after a week of working hard. I hadn't been working much in the summer because they weren't busy; but I had gotten a job at the Courant Institute of Mathematical Science Library. I absolutely loved working there and I worked with girls my age so it was a lot of fun. It'd located on the twelfth floor of Warren Weaver Hall corner of 4th West, and the latest I'd work would be nine thirty; so it was nice knowing I wouldn't have long days like I had often had at the café..

I was only working every other Saturday, otherwise I had weekends off and I worked four days a week. All of my classes this semester were in the morning, and Edward had school mostly early afternoon and some evenings, so between classes in the morning; if he got his ass out of bed, we'd go have breakfast together and on days that I'd work until nine thirty he'd always have dinner at home waiting for me.

Things had been going pretty alright with us, and I only hope it'd continue.

When we got to the car I popped the trunk and they tossed their bags in. This summer I'd gotten a new car, because my truck had finally broken down for good. I'd tried to start it and it was completely dead, so after having a shop out here look at it; they said there really was nothing they could do besides change out all these fucking things and do some body work; I said fuck it and Edward and I went to a Toyota Dealership.

I'd gotten a new 2009 silver Toyota Corola, and primary that was where my paycheck went, as well as picking up groceries, too. Since I wanted to contribute, Edward told me that was what I could do, and even though it was mostly for myself; I had agreed because he used the car, too.

" I can't wait to get my hands on you later." Edward growled into my ear as James got into the backseat.

I laughed as he nibbled on my ear and went to get into the driver's seat. When we got to the brownstone I parked on the curb and got out as James whistled.

" Nice place you got here." he complimented as he grabbed his bag.

" Thanks, and no smoking inside. Only in the back."

He wrapped his arm around my neck and pulled me against him, " Whatever you say. Do we have to eat food in the kitchen only?"

Edward laughed as he unlocked the front door, " Watch your mouth or she'll probably make you."

I glared at Edward as he walked in the house and started jogging upstairs. We had an extra bedroom upstairs that we had furnished with a nice cot and simple furniture thanks to Esme, so James was staying up there. The other room upstairs Edward and I basically had put up shelves, and put in two desks and a couch with a nice rug and throw pillows so we could study and keep our school things in one place.

I went to the kitchen and grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge before going into the living room to lay across the couch. Only a minute later Edward was scooting behind me with his arms around my waist, lavishing my neck with his mouth.

" Did you miss me?"

" Mhm, it was so lonely being here alone for two days. I don't-"

Before I could finish my sentence he turned my face towards his and slipped his tongue into my mouth, massaging it against mine in smooth strokes. I smiled before kissing him back, tasting mint and the distant taste of cigarette's.

" If you both don't mind, I'm kind of starving. Where can I find food?"

" I made some salad and brats for dinner last night. Leftovers are in the fridge in the kitchen and help yourself."

" Any beer?"

" Edward bought some Heineken before we left, there were three in there after I had one last night."

This past summer since Edward had turned 21 he thought it made him notoriously cool that he could buy his own beer, so we usually always have some type in the fridge or lingering around somewhere.

" Drinking my beer? I don't condone teenage drinking."

I stuck my tongue out at him and he kissed me before hopping off of the couch.

" Don't go, I missed you." I whined.

" I just flew across the country, with one layover and all I had to eat were peanuts and a coke. I need food."

Both he and James went to raid the fridge for food while I laid on the couch. They returned with full plates, James sitting on the couch and Edward on the floor in front of me. I played with the hair on the nape of his neck and pressed my nose against his shoulder to breath in his scent.

" So, Eddie here was telling me that you guys are planning to get married in a year, huh?"

" That's the plan right now."

James smirked, " It was all he talked about while he was in Cali. Bella and I want to get married in October. Bella and I have been talking about colors. My mom is so happy about our engagement. Bella loved her ring. Bella. Bella. Bella." James chuckled while the tips of Edward's ears reddened.

I let out a sarcastic 'awww', " Aren't you just so adorable?"

" Don't embarrass him, too much. It's slightly endearing."

" Any lucky lady in your life?" I asked curiously.

He shrugged, " Nah. I don't do relationships, Bells, we both know this."

I rolled my eyes, " This isn't high school anymore. Don't you want to settle down?"

" Maybe later. Right now I just want to finish college. It's not like I don't have my fun on the weekends." he said, waggling his eyebrows suggestively at Edward and I.

I shivered, " Gross, I don't need to fucking know that. Ew."

" You caught Vicky and I having sex multiple times, don't be such a baby."

" And it was so nasty!"

Edward laughed at our banter and leaned his head back against the couch, letting me kiss his forehead. He smiled and James groaned from across the way.

" Am I going to have to deal with all the-"

" Shut up, you wanted to come here." Edward said with a chuckle and taking a bite out of his brat.

Once they finished with dinner it was already eight in the evening, and after a long flight the boys were both exhausted. James passed out on the couch and Edward woke him up to go upstairs as I cleaned up the living room from their food and went upstairs to join Edward, who was already in bed, cuddled under the sheets and looking through at the television. After getting ready for bed I crawled in behind him, my chest to his back.

" So everything with your mom was good?"

" Yeah, it was a lot of fun spending time with her. How was California?"

He turned around in my arms with a smile on his face, " I did something."

" What do you mean?"

Edward sat up and brought his fingers to the hem of his shirt, lifting it up off of him.

" I thought you were tired?" I teased.

He smirked and tangled my fingers in his before bringing it just underneath his left pectoral and over his upper ribcage. I looked down and saw black ink that had the initial 'B' in an elegant setting. It was simple and pretty.

And fucking _permanent._

I ran my fingers over it, the skin slightly raised because it was still new and healing.

" The look on your face is conflicting."

" Edward..."

" I didn't want to get something completely stupid, so I kept it simple."

I looked up at him and smiled, leaning up to kiss him softly. " I didn't realize an initial could be so sexy."

A smile immediately spread over his face, " Yeah?"

" It's fucking awesome. I can't believe you'd do that."

" Well, it's there."

" Do I get a matching one now?"

He rolled his eyes, " I didn't get it so you'd want to get one. I got it because I...Well, I fucking love you more than anything."

The way he put it was simple and to the point. He loved me, that's why he did it and that was the best feeling in the world knowing how committed he was to me. Even though I knew it, to see this on his body was another.

I wrapped my arms around his neck and he pulled me on top of him, grasping my hips to brace me. My fingers traced his tattoo, my other hand tangled in his against his mouth as he kissed my palm.

" I love you, too."

" I have to take you to California some day, it's such a cool experience."

I smiled, " That so?"

He nodded, " Mhm. Carlisle actually owns a beach house in Monterey. Maybe one day they'd let us go out there."

" A beach house, why haven't I heard about this?!"

" I don't really know. He's had it since Emmett and Alice were young, and him and Esme go there went there a few times for their anniversary."

My mind wandered off to thoughts of Edward and I alone on a nice private beach. The thoughts weren't all that innocent but I couldn't help myself. Edward on the beach, all tan and sweaty from the sun, hair wet from the water.

" Is it a private beach house?"

His eyes narrowed, " It is."

" So many opportunities." I said cryptically.

" Dirty girl." Edward growled, tackling me towards the end of the bed as he hovered over me and tickled me relentlessly until I was screaming for him to stop because my sides were cramping from how hard I was laughing. His ministrations were relentless.

There was a loud knock on the door and a tired, yelling James at the other side of it.

" Stop fooling around in there I'm trying to sleep!"

Edward and I both silenced and I giggled into the comforter as I turn onto my stomach and look at the door. Making me squeal in surprise Edward lowered my sleep shorts and smacked my ass so hard I could hear the sound of his hand meeting my skin echo. I yelled out and turned around, grabbing him before he could sit back and wrestling him down to the bed.

Unfortunately, he was stronger and I lost under his hold. And of course our wrestling around the bed turned into rolling around the bed in a heated make out session, to groping and clothes hitting the floor as we had the reunion Edward had mentioned earlier.

~\\~

" Breakfast, hell yeah." I heard a familiar voice say as they entered the kitchen.

" Hungry?"

James plopped down at our square table, " Starving. Where's Ed?"

I chuckled, " Still sleeping."

" Seriously? I was dead the moment I hit the pillow but once eight hit I was up."

I shrugged and plated some pancakes for James to start eating since he looked so hungry. I put a little butter onto the pan and let it sizzle so I could pour more batter for pancakes.

" That is, after I told you both to shut the fuck up." He continued.

" He's just really tired I guess." I said slyly with a smile.

" Nice shit eating grin there, Bells."

Right as I was about to respond to him I heard Edward yelling my name from upstairs loudly. I turned the heat off on the stove, my brows furrowed as I made my way to the stairs. He yelled for me again and I quickened my pace, James hot on my heels.

I went into the bedroom and didn't spot Edward, so I went into the bathroom and saw him sitting on the closed toilet seat holding a shivering little ball of fluff.

" Edward, what the fuck are you holding!"

" It's a goddamn kitten! I got up to take a fucking piss and I saw it sleeping in our fucking bathtub!"

" How the hell did a kitten get in here?!"

He looked at the open window, where right outside there was a tall tree with spouting branches. This little thing must have been a fucking ninja because there was no way it could have gotten in here otherwise. I stepped closer and saw that it was shaking in Edward's arms.

" Edward, you have to let it go; it could be carrying something."

" We can't just shove it back outside. It's an animal!"

I rolled my eyes at his ridiculous tantrum over the kitten.

" I mean stop holding it so close to you like that. It could have fleas or some shit like that. James, can you grab a towel from downstairs."

" Uh, yeah, sure."

Reaching out towards the small little kitten I knew it couldn't be over four months old. The fur was clumped together with a few mats. It shivered when I picked it up and placed it in the tub, running water from the spicket and letting it warm.

Surprisingly, the kitten didn't try to jump out when Edward and I started to wash him or her very carefully. Its fur was white and silver, but there was dirt on the little paws and tail as well as on the fur under its belly. James returned with a towel and I grabbed my shampoo and started to lather up the kitten. I didn't see any visible bugs, but I kept scrubbing and then used a little conditioner, which loosened the matt's and made them easy to get out. The poor thing was scared and shaking even after wrapping it in a towel, but atleast he or she didn't fight us while we bathed it.

" There's a vet just around the corner near the bank. We should get it checked out. There's no collar or anything."

I wrapped the little ball of fluff in a towel and Edward rinsed the dirt and grime out of the tub before closing the door.

" Okay, little one, you are going to stay here while I get dressed." I said quietly to the shaking animal as I set it down on the mound of messy blankets on our bed. The kitten didn't move while I got dressed, but she watched me go back and forth, as well as Edward once he got out of the bathroom.

I just tossed on a t-shirt and some shorts and put my hair in a ponytail. I brushed my teeth and found Edward holding the small shivering kitten in his arms.

" Alrighty lets roll."

I slipped my sunglasses on and jogged downstairs, seeing James in the kitchen finishing up the breakfast I had been cooking.

" We'll be back. Don't burn the place down."

He rolled his eyes, " Have fun."

When we got to the vet they were luckily no people in the waiting area, and a technician behind the desk had immediately stood up and come to us upon seeing the little guy. She let us into an exam room as we explained to her the situation, and that we didn't know if there was an owner or anything.

A doctor was in the room just a few minutes later and had let Edward set the kitten down on the exam table so that they could get a proper look.

" Well, I can tell this is a silver Persian kitten and it's a female. She honestly can't be over ten weeks old right now the tiny little thing. She's probably very much dehydrated and famished. So how did you come upon her?" the vet asked nicely, combing through the fur with a fine comb.

" I found her in our second story bathroom. My fiancé had left the window open to let air in and when I went into the bathroom she was asleep in the bathtub. She scared the sh- crap out of me. We didn't want to really touch her too much without giving her a bath just in case, but she was also full of dirt and mud."

The vet, which still hadn't even given us a name and I couldn't see a name tag, nodded at us and looked close at her skin and fur in different places.

" Well, she doesn't have fleas, but she seems very scared with human interaction. Her mother maybe could be a stray or maybe a runaway and it's possible she got away from her little family. We never exactly know in these situations but she doesn't seem like a kitten who's gotten any love. There is no collar and well, we can just keep her here until we send her to a humane society facility after getting her properly fed and hydrated unless you both would like to keep her of course. There is no claim on her it seems, so it's up to you."

When I looked over at Edward, I could see that he was already attached to the little kitten. He had a soft spot and I knew exactly in that moment that we were most likely going to be going shopping for cat bowls and litter boxes. He wanted her even if he didn't want to admit it.

With a sigh I looked up at the vet, " I think we'd like to keep her." I said, grabbing Edward's hand.

She smiled, " Of course. Well, I think I'd like to keep her here for a few hours and get her hydrated, see how she'll act after being fed and of course give you a call. It should only be a few hours unless something comes up. She is very lucky to have found someone who did right by her."

" Sure, of course."

" I'll have my technician Jen get all of your information and I'll see you both soon." the vet said, shaking both of our hands before picking up the shivering little kitten and taking her through the opposite door of the room.

Edward and I went to the front desk and gave the lady our number and address before heading out and getting into the car.

" You really want her?" he asked.

I looked up at him, " Don't even deny it, you fucking love that little thing already. Maybe we need something to add to our home anyways. So, to the pet store?"

He sighed, " I guess so, can we get coffee first? I'm fucking dying."

After making a quick run through the drive-thru of Starbucks Edward and I went to the Petsmart that was located right next to our Target. When we walked in, I honestly didn't know where to start, but one side was for dogs and the others for cats so we started with the first aisle.

We went through each aisle, picking out a good cat food; even though neither of us knew shit about what kind would be good for her; the people who worked here seemed very helpful and said not to get canned because they have a lot of fillers that are no good. So we got an all natural holistic food called buffalo blue and then went on to bowls. We picked out cute little white bowls with pink skulls all over it and then went to get some combs, cat clippers, litter and a litter box to go with it and then we got to all of the toys.

Edward went completely overboard. He bought a scratching post, insisting that she needed it so that there would be no furniture damage, but the little thing that stuck to the wall with a long spring with a bell and feathers at the end was just something he said he 'had' to get. We also got her a little bed to put downstairs, and one to put in our bedroom for her to sleep on at night.

Who would've known the boyfriend I had a few years ago who acted like such a badass loved kittens so much. As we got to checkout, Edward insisted on paying for everything since he wanted to keep her in the first place, and as we got into the car we started rattling off name after name.

When we got back home James is lounging on the couch only in boxers drinking coffee and watching fucking SpongeBob.

" Dude, what the fuck?"

He shrugged, " What? A grown ass man can't watch SpongeBob?"

I shook my head and started taking the things into the kitchen to set on the table.

" You really okay about this?"

" It's just a kitten, Edward. I mean, a dog would be a different story. And I've never really had a pet before."

Edward smiled and kissed my temple before taking bowls out of the bag. We decided to put the litter box in the laundry room underneath the utility sink in there because it fit perfect and it had a top as well so she wouldn't hit her head on anything. It was out of the way as well.

We set the little bowls near the kitchen table and filled it up with food and fresh water and then put her toys in the little fabric toy box we'd gotten her as well as sticking the toy to the wall and putting the scratching post in the corner.

" How many cats are you guys keeping?" James laughed.

" Don't ask me, ask the crazy cat lady over there." I teased, sitting down on the couch next to James.

Edward glared at me and sat down on the other couch. The rest of the day seemed to go by slowly and around early evening we got a call from the vet asking us to come in. James decided to join us since he didn't want to be coped up anymore in the house so we all went together.

When we got to the vet we immediately got in and Dr. Jett, who of which was now wearing a nametag, came in holding the kitten with a warm blanket wrapped around her and she looked so much more healthy and happy; looking around the room eagerly with wide blue eyes.

" We dried her up and gave her some fluids and a little bit of food and she perked right up. Her temperature was a little cold so we wrapped her up in a warm blanket, but here is your towel. We gave her two kitten shots which will help with her immune system and she has a little bit of a cold so we have medicine to give to her."

I nodded, " Okay, how much is all this going to be?"

She waved her hand, " Don't worry about it, sweetheart. It's not often we have people so nice to come in to bring in poor little kittens like this one. I'll take care of it, just give her a good home and some love." she said, handing her over.

" We couldn't- " Edward started.

" Just enjoy her. And her medicine will be up front waiting for you; all the instructions are on the bottle."

" Thank you so much." I said profusely.

After getting the medicine we walked out and headed to the car, a new addition to our home in Edward's arms. When we got back to the house Edward was adamant about watching every single move that the little kitten made; it was slightly hilarious.

For most of the day we just relaxed and hung out, but by the time dinner rolled around we locked up and headed out to the city to show James around a bit to get the ' New York Experience' as he was saying, and we went to a sandwich shop for dinner and had Panini's and drinks.

It was nice to catch up and hear about what James was doing in California, and he seemed to be enjoying it; his relationship with his parents had improved he was telling us. I guess as kids we all get caught up in shit we shouldn't and it does affect our parents; but he claimed him and his mom were getting along okay now.

Afterwards we had just decided to head home after planning to do more looking around tomorrow, and Edward was drinking just a little bit too much beer, so I had to get him into bed before he collapsed on the pavement.

When we walked into the house a little ball of silvery white fluff was bouncing around at our ankles meowing and scared the shit out of me; it followed all of us upstairs and we said goodnight to James and went into our room.

" Baby, baby, slow down." Edward said roughly as I pushed him to sit on the bed.

I chuckled, " You need to get some sleep tonight."

The little kitten, still with no name to her, jumped onto the bed and I glared.

" No cats on the bed, no way."

Edward bent over, exposing a sliver of his smooth pale skin as he scooped her up.

" What's she going to do? Cuddle us to death? She's so fucking adorable." he said, petting her lovingly and laying back on the bed. I rolled my eyes at him and slipped his shoes off before getting undressed myself and getting into bed.

The kitten jumped from Edward's arms and curled up against my chest, nuzzling her little head above my heart.

" So what do we name her?" I asked."

" Fluffy? Fuck if I know, babe."

I sighed and cuddled up into the bed, letting the kitten lay next to me. Edward scooted up and started to unbutton his shirt before tossing it off.

" How about Zoey? I like that name." I mentioned.

He scuffed up the hair on the top of her head and she batted his hands away with her tiny paws. She honestly was an adorable little kitten, I couldn't imagine what it would have been like if she hadn't gotten her way into our lives.

" Zoey it is."

I looked up at him and reached over to rest my head on his shoulder, my hand resting lightly on his bare stomach.

" Everything feels so right." I told him, kissing the underside of his jaw.

" That's because everything finally is right. We've gotten through our fucked up situations and came out together in the end...and I hope that never changes no matter what." he said, rolling to lean over me while Zoey curled up at the end of the bed comfortably.

I looked up into his eyes and ran my hand over the side of his face, seeing all the love in his eyes that were in mine.

" Us against the world, right?"

He leaned down to place a lingering kiss against my slightly parted lips.

" That's right."

**Authors Note- I hope you enjoyed the chapter. Thank you for reading.**


	51. Slipped Away

**Authors Note- Hey guys, life is crazy, which is why this is late. Keep on reading.**

**Disclaimer- S. Meyer owns all things Twilight.**

****This chapter contains upsetting subjects and content, read with caution****

**Chapter Song- Slipped Away by: Avril Lavigne ( Loosely)**

~\\~

June 20th, 2010

Sunday

EPOV

~\\~

" Edward this is too much. Why can't we just get the same band?" Bella asked quietly, not wanting to talk to loudly in front of the lady behind the counter.

" We're going to be wearing these for the rest of our lives, and I want to give you the best. Don't argue with me, please."

She sighed and nodded, and the lady behind the counter lit up like it was her that was getting married. I wrapped my arm around Bella's waist and she leaned into me, looking up at me as if I were crazy while the ticket was being written up for the order.

" I'm only doing this because it's your Birthday and to appease you."

I couldn't believe that in just two short months Bella and I were going to actually be married. We had wanted a fall wedding but because of school, we decided to have the wedding in the late summer, August 13th to be exact, so that we could have a proper honeymoon. I wanted to fucking enjoy Bella being mine for a few weeks before we were whisked into the drama known as school.

I was already finished with my third year of school, and Bella would be with hers after this fall/winter semester. Our time in school seems to have been going quickly and finally with an actual summer off, since last year we had been so focused on getting our new place together while juggling family time, we were able to spend more time with our family and settle down to actually plan the wedding.

We figured it would make the most sense to have our wedding in Washington, and we were going to be having an outdoor wedding in Forks. My mother had gone insane planning on having it beyond our backyard near the Calawah River. There was just a very short trail towards it from our home until the tree's cleared out all around in a clearing that was going to be absolutely perfect for the wedding.

I knew that Bella was skeptical about all of this, doing all of the taste testing for cake and the catering, as well as color coordinating and flower arrangements; It made her feel out of her element but I was so fucking happy to be doing this with her. We were keeping everything as simple as we could while still making it elegant, especially for my mother's sake. She didn't want us to have some ceremony with just her, Carlisle, dad, Emmett and Alice like Bella would prefer; there would be family and friends attending. I was glad that we had both Alice and my mom involved, they brought Bella back down from all the craziness and at the end of the day I could assure her everything was going to be perfect.

She wanted to bite Alice's head off at times, and I knew it. I bet if it were up to Bella she'd be wearing a short black dress to the wedding with a pair of stiletto's, not that I'd argue, but I knew there was a beautiful white wedding dress hanging in someone's closet somewhere.

I knew that she already had the dress perfectly fitted but I had absolutely no idea what it looked like, and I could wait until she could walk down the aisle towards me wearing it. I had picked my father as my best man, and Bella had chosen Alice as her maid of honor, and Angela as a bridesmaid. I knew she had picked Alice because after everything with the accident, they had become closer and I knew that Bella felt she needed to give back to Alice for all Alice had done for her during that time.

And Alice was completely enjoying every single part of wedding planning. She was dragging Bella just about everywhere for decorations for the wedding, although everything was going to be a surprise to us when it was going to be decorated completely. Invitations had been sent out in the beginning of the summer and the Cullen house phone was blowing up with RSVP's. The Hale's and Whitlock's immediate family were invited, along with aunts, uncles, cousins on my parents side. Bella had sent out the invitations to her mother, and Charlie; she even extended an invitation to Blake and his wife. James would be there, and I was sure Ben would be as well, and if Jessica had a date he'd be attending.

" Okay, Mr. Masen, here is the total. Since the rings are going to be engraved and of course made in the correct sizes we will give you a call when everything is ready."

I swiped my card and everything was done. When we walked out I led her to the car and opened up the door. She sat in the seat but with her legs outside of the car, looking up at me through her eyes.

" Promise me that this is the last time, I can't take anymore extravagant gifts."

" Not even close, my love." I said, leaning down to give her a lingering kiss.

" What else do you want to do today?" she asked.

" We'd better get back home before my mom kicks my ass." I told her, kissing her again.

She smiled radiantly and rested her hands on my chest, " I'm excited for today."

After stealing a few more kisses I got into the car and started heading back to Forks. It was pouring rain and thundering outside, I think stores were closing up because the roads were starting to flood; luckily we got into Forks before they closed any and got home. Bella was staring outside with wide eyes, but my hand held hers tightly.

I kept my hand firmly on the wheel and parked as close as I could to the house. Unlucky for us, the garage door wasn't working so we'd have to make a run for it up to the front door. After putting our hoods up Bella and I made a run for it, her laughing the entire way.

When we got to the front door she almost slipped on the welcome mat and I caught her around the waist, both of us soaking wet from the cold rain and shivering. Her hair was dripping, and I bet mine was no better.

After getting into the house Esme was rushing down the hallway into the foyer looking at us with wide, frightened eyes at our dripping wet bodies.

" Do not move, I'll go get towels."

" Mom, we're fucking freezing." I said as Bella shivered next to me.

" Watch your tone Edward Masen!"

I lifted Bella up into my arms and she let out a loud squeak as I started for the stairs, my mom yelling at me the entire time as my shoes squelched against the marble and then sunk into the carpet covering the stairs. I walked past Emmett's room, and he was in there with Rosalie watching a movie, laughing when he saw us.

I led us into the bathroom in the hallway instead of mine and set Bella's shivering form down as I turned on the shower to a hot setting. Our clothes hit the floor with obnoxious _splats _as we took them off and goose bumps covered every single inch of our flesh.

" EDWARD ANTHONY MASEN YOU ARE IN BIG TROUBLE!" I heard Esme yell through the sound of the pulsing shower head. I laughed and slipped my wet pack of cigarettes from my pocket, groaning.

" Ugh, now I'm pissed."

Bella hopped into the shower, sighing at the hot water hitting her skin and I jumped in after her, bumping up against the tile as we laughed and kissed and touched until our bodies were warm. We stayed in the shower for about ten minutes, trying to buy time away from my mom's anger and I just wanted to ravage Bella a little longer.

It was my Birthday, cut me some slack.

Afterwards we realized that we had absolutely no dry clothes to change into, so with our soaking clothes in hand, and towels wrapped around us we stepped out of the bathroom.

And as we turned out of the bathroom, we fucking ran right into Carlisle. Or at least, Bella did.

They both jumped back quickly, Bella and Carlisle with wide eyes at the awkwardness.

" Uhm..."

" I'm not going to ask." Carlisle said, shaking his head and walking past us with his lips upturned on one side.

Just as we turned back to head to our room suddenly I heard Emmett's booming laughter followed by cold air hitting me from below.

Motherfucker ripped my towel off.

" EMMETT, YOU FUCKER!" I yelled as Bella stood in front of me so I wouldn't be hanging out for all to see.

Rosalie stood by his bedroom door bent over cackling like the little fucking bitch she was.

" Happy Birthday, bro!"

" OH, OH, JESUS CHRIST!" I suddenly heard Alice scream as she was behind me seeing my exposed ass.

I grabbed my soaked shirt and covered myself as Alice covered her eyes and mumbled quietly to herself and I honestly couldn't fucking believe this had happened.

" All I wanted was to borrow mom's earrings, and I see my brothers white ass. Why are you naked?!" Alice screamed as Bella hung tightly onto her own towel.

" For the love of all that is holy what is going on in my house?!" my mother yelled at the end of the hall, holding carpet cleaner in one hand and a rag in another.

" Emmett took my fucking towel."

And she laughed, she fucking laughed.

" Yeah, yeah, laugh it up."

I turned around, no shame all pride and strode towards my bedroom, Bella closely behind me trying not to laugh behind her hand.

" No doors closed!"

" I'M TWENTY TWO." I shouted, shutting my bedroom door and dropping everything in my hands.

I tore Bella's towel from her, making her gasp and glared.

" How does it feel?! Hm, going to continue laughing at me?"

" I have more to cover up, you ass." she said, grabbing the blanket on the bed, covering herself up.

I tossed it onto the floor and crawled up on the bed towards her with a feral look in my eyes, making it clear what I wanted from her. Her skin was pale and smooth underneath my touch, soft in all the right places and curves where any model could dream of. Long damp hair tangled below her head, makeup smudged and smoked from the hot steam of the shower.

She was the definition of sex.

And all mine.

~\\~

Once Bella slipped her tank top on I knew all of our afternoon fun was over and it was back to celebrating my Birthday in ways that involved more clothing and less contact; though her fingers never left mine as we went downstairs, wearing dry clothes this time.

Emmett sat at the kitchen table with a smirk on his face while Alice looked as if she was contemplating how to bleach her brain and forget any memory of seeing my bare ass.

" I don't know which to do first. Bleach my eyes or kill Emmett." She said miserably, shaking her head.

Bella smiled and sat at one of the stools, wearing a pair of shorts that showed off her beautiful long legs and a sweatshirt that belonged to me pulled over her head where dried curly hair lay. I wrap my arms around her, kissing the side of her neck when suddenly a boom of thunder goes off outside and lightning strikes.

It feels like the house shakes as suddenly everything goes dark, only the bleak grey from the outside providing light.

" Oh, no! The power!" my mom complained.

Bella shook slightly with the loud noise of the thunder and the flashes of lightening that lit up the kitchen.

" I don't want your cake to go bad!" I could still hear my mom complaining in the background, but I was focused on Bella, twisting her engagement ring around her finger playfully as I held her delicate hand.

" Don't worry about it mom."

" Well, at least the stove works but I can't see a goddamn thing in here!"

I smirked and Alice rolled her eyes at the dramatics, hopping off of her chair to grab candles from the drawer as well as a flashlight to sit upwards towards the ceiling so it would illuminate the room.

" Dinner is going to be great, mom. Don't worry."

I could smell all the spices from what she was putting together, and right not she was cooking the lasagna noodles while she mixed the ricotta with the spices and stirred up the fresh tomato sauce. It was a meal made for the winter, but every year my mom would always make what we requested for dinner.

" I feel really sick all of sudden." Bella suddenly said before quickly dashing out of her seat and down to the hallway bathroom.

Alice and Esme gave me a worried glance and Emmett cringed upon hearing the sound of Bella's heaving. I went to the bathroom and found her leaning over holding her hair back, all of her lunch now being expelled from her stomach. I grabbed onto her hair and she heaved again violently, one hand was on her stomach almost as if she were in physical pain.

" Bella, what's-"

" Just a cramp in my side. I felt really nausea's, I'm okay now." she claimed, wiping off her mouth and sitting back against the wall.

She was extremely pale and I was glad then when Alice came back holding a bottle of Powerade. I held it up to Bella and she took a few sips before leaning back.

" Stop looking at me as if I'm dying. Everything is alright."

I held her hand tightly in mine, trying to avoid that look but something in my gut was telling me something was off.

~\\~

Dinner went well without a hitch, and we ate at the table with candles lit around us so that we could see. Bella wasn't exactly up for a meal right now so she was just quietly eating crackers in her seat, letting me hold her hand on my knee during our meal. I was worried about her, but she wasn't going to let me press on it.

After dinner everybody did the whole 'Happy Birthday' rendition and sung, we cut the chocolate cake and then I opened all the presents from everybody. I was more eager to get Bella into bed to rest for awhile, but grateful for all the gifts from my family members. Once the clock started edging towards eight thirty the house was almost pitch black, and we all were taking flashlights upstairs to our bedrooms in order to see.

When we got to my bedroom Bella laid across the bed, in a somewhat weird fetal position. I stepped over to her, running my hand over her forehead and leaning down to kiss her temple.

" You're in pain. What's wrong, Bella?"

" Just this weird cramping."

" Are you on your period?" I knew she probably didn't want to even discuss that with me, but I was worried for her safety.

She shook her head, " I could be getting it, since I switch my birth-control my doctor told me I might not get it for the first month or two, it's been a few weeks now but I take it so I don't get these cramps." she sighed, resting her hand once again on her stomach.

I let her be and instead went to change my clothes and brush my teeth from all the cake I'd just consumed. By the time I was finished Bella was asleep in bed. I didn't bother trying to change her out of her shorts and t-shirt, she was comfortable in her own way, and fuck if I'd mess with that.

I went downstairs to get another bottle of Powerade just in case she woke up and a few Tylenols as well, stumbling my way around in the darkness. The thunder was getting louder and louder by the moment and I hoped Bella would stay asleep. I pulled the curtains closed over the floor to ceiling glass windows in my bedroom and let a candle light up the room in the corner as I got into bed to get some rest as well, trying to be careful so I wouldn't bother Bella in her deep sleep.

Just as I had pulled the sheet back I saw a pool of blood surrounding Bella's lower half, in panic I reached over and shook her shoulder, rousing her from her sleep. It was as if she knew immediately something was wrong, feeling the wetness of the blood and she looked down in horror, not knowing what to do or if she should move.

" Oh my god." she gasped out in short breaths.

" Holy shit, Bella, stay here, baby, I'm going to get Carlisle. Don't move."

I pushed myself out of the bed and quickly strode as quickly as I could towards my their bedroom. As the door opened, they both seemed to rouse from their bed and sit up, as if they knew exactly what was going on, or that something was wrong. My mom sat up and looked at me; alarmed.

" Something's wrong with Bella, I don't- There's blood all over the bed."

My mom and Carlisle both sprung out of the bed and I looked down at my phone, seeing no service available to call 911. I threw it against the wall and ran back into the bedroom, seeing Bella sitting in her own blood with tears on her face as Esme pressed her head against her chest while Carlisle looked over her for just a moment before panicked eyes went up to mine.

" We need to get to the hospital, now."

~\\~

I was glad that even a small town of Forks had a power generator in the hospital for when the power goes out.

My arms had carried Bella, while Carlisle talked to a lady he knew familiar and immediately Bella was settled onto a bed, crying almost hysterically in fear of what was going on while I held her hand and they wheeled her into a room. While they put an IV into her arm they asked question after question, but after looking over her charts they knew most of her information; including the accident that had happened a year ago.

She answered shakily, some I answered for her and I helped slip her into a green gown, immediately taking off all of the bloodied clothing. And Esme had luckily thought of clean undergarments for her before leaving the house.

A doctor was quickly in with her and they were wheeling her over to get an X-Ray and MRI, as well as helping her clean up from all the blood. I insisted to come with but all I'd do was stand outside of a door so I stayed in the room on Bella's insistence and just tapped my foot on the ground impatiently, wanting to see my fiancé to make sure she was alright.

" What the fuck is going on?" I whispered, tugging at my hair.

After fifteen long minutes of being away from her they wheeled her back in and said the doctor would be back. They'd given her medicine for the cramping, injecting it into her IV as well as something else for her anxiety so the uncontrollable shaking of her body, due to a panic attack, would calm down.

I grabbed her hand and kissed the back of it, " It's okay, baby."

" They were doing an ultra sound before they wheeled me back here." she said blankly, her mind seeming to be in all different directions.

When the doctor walked in he had on a straight face, and when I looked at my mom it was almost like she knew what was going on in that moment.

" , it was stated here that you had been on birth control but switched two months ago because it wasn't working quite as you wanted, correct?" he asked calmly.

" Yes."

" In effect it would take a week or two in order for it to start working, meaning any intercourse in that time would have been without protection. The nurse also said that you claimed your doctor told you it was normal not to have your menstrual cycle until maybe a few weeks or so after it normally occurs. After your accident a year ago and the damage caused to you the doctors said that it was basically impossible for you to become pregnant; you know this I am sure." He said, basically scanning notes over everything we'd already talked about.

" Can you get to the point of all this?" Bella asked shakily.

His face dropped and he sighed, " Miss. Swan, I am so sorry to inform you that you had a miscarriage."

The world stopped for a moment and I was sure that I wasn't breathing anymore as the words registered in my mind. I grabbed onto the rail of the bed so I wouldn't fall over as my world went dizzy. I vaguely saw Bella cover her hands with her face and Esme cover her mouth with her hand, Carlisle standing in the corner of the room with a solemn look on his face as he took his wife into his arms.

" I assume you didn't know you were pregnant, and you were only about a month and a half along. We believe because of the injuries that you've suffered in the past the embryo wasn't able to develop correctly and had passed which would explain all of the blood. I'm so very sorry for your loss."

" This won't require any surgery will it?" Bella asked blankly as I still stood. Stoic.

" Since it was so early your body will naturally let this pass so we won't have to do anything invasive or a D&C procedure. Over the next few days you might have cramping, we'll prescribe you something to help with the pain; you will also experience some spotting or bleeding like a regular menstrual cycle for maybe a week, and do not be using tampons. I suggest resting plenty and keeping hydrated. No sexual intercourse and to prevent any infections make sure you only take showers, no taking baths or swimming; I'm sure you understand what I am saying.

My mind came around somewhere in the middle and I pushed the railings down on the bed and sat next to Bella, feeling her hand grab mine and hold almost painfully.

" I'll make sure she's well taken care of."

He nodded, " Again, I'm very sorry for your loss."

Bella nodded and turned her head into my shoulder.

" We're going to monitor you for about an hour and then we can get your release papers if everything is okay. I'll leave you to your family and a nurse will be checking in every fifteen minutes or so."

The moment the curtain closed Bella was breaking out in full sobs and I took her into my arms as she buried her face in my shoulder, her body shaking and tears streaming down her face. I felt Carlisle's hand then rest on my shoulder.

" I'm going to have Esme drop me off at home since I have work in the morning and she'll come back with your car to stay until Bella is released."

Just as I thought he'd turn and leave, he leaned towards Bella and set his hand on her leg.

" I'm so sorry, Bella." he said quietly.

Esme was crying quietly and she wrapped her arm around my neck and kissed my temple, her other hand resting on the back of Bella's head that was turned towards me.

" I'll be back, okay? I love you both."

Once we were alone I scooted more onto the bed and Bella laid on my lap as I let her cry, let her get everything out as I rubbed her back and didn't even know how to feel. We'd created a beautiful mixture of the both of us unknowingly, and it was gone before we knew it had even existed.

After twenty minutes Bella had finally calmed down, and I kept running my fingers through her hair, kissing her hand and trying in any way to soothe my beautiful girl.

" Why does all of this have to happen?" she asked tearfully.

" I don't know, Bella. I don't know."

I kissed her temple and held her closely.

" I just can't believe that I didn't know. What if I could have done something? Seen a doctor or-"

" Bella it could have happened anyways, we can't drive ourselves crazy with all of the what-if's."

She nuzzled into my neck and I hugged her closer to me, wishing I could just burrow her inside me and protect her from all of this pain and fucked up shit.

" It's going to be alright. You know, I bet we have Zoey crying at the front door wondering where you are."

I got a small, weak laugh out of her, " No. She loves Alice now since we brought her with."

" We're going to get through this, it's all going to be okay." I assured her.

She wiped her face, " I don't want it to be like when I had my accident."

" It won't; I promise you. Fuck, I'd like to think everything happens for a reason. Maybe all of this is just trying to show us that life is too fucking short, we need to make the best of all of it and prove that we can rise above all the negative that gets thrown at us."

" Maybe." she said quietly.

" I love you."

" I love you, too...but, god, what if, Edward?"

" I don't know, baby." I whispered quietly.

It still felt like my head was spinning from how fast all of this was happening, one minute I was celebrating my Birthday and the next I was sitting in a fucking hospital with my fiancé who miscarried a child I didn't even know she was carrying in the first place. My baby. My son or could have been daughter.

I curled her up in my arms, never wanting to let go and wanting to protect her from all of this.

My approach could of been of self-loathing, knowing that I was the one that did this to her in the first place but neither of us knew it was possible for Bella to get pregnant; and I didn't want this to ruin the happiness that was coming for us in the future. We had our wedding to look forward to, and while I knew this was something we'd have to overcome, I'd be fucking damned if I'd let it ruin all the progress Bella had made in the past two years.

The nurse came in to check up on Bella and to ask how she was feeling, the pain medicine they gave her for the cramps were working, but she was uncomfortable in general; which was something that she'd have to get over in time.

" I feel like my Birthday has become bad luck for us."

Her hand rested on my chest and she looked up at me through her doe eyes.

" No, please don't fucking say that."

" How can I not? What the hell is going to happen to you next year?" I asked bitterly.

She shook her head, " Edward, please don't think that."

I kissed the top of her head and then all but fifteen minutes later my mom had returned looking a little more composed wearing a pair of jeans and a plain flowing shirt, much different from her usual skirts and fancy dresses. In her hand she held a bag, which I assumed was changing clothes for Bella.

She sat in the chair close to the bed and rested her hand in Bella's leg in a comforting manner. Bella didn't turn from my chest or even acknowledge her; she only held onto me and buried her face in my shoulder.

" Do you need anything, sweetheart? Ginger ale or maybe crackers?" Esme asked.

Bella shook her head, " No thank you, Esme. I'm...alright."

I knew she wasn't alright, but there was nothing more to say. What was there to say?

Esme said she was going to get some coffee and Bella said she wanted to put her clothes on, so I helped her into her clothes, glad that Esme had just brought a pair of simple sleep shorts and a plain white short-sleeved t-shirt with just her moccasins as well as one of my sweatshirts.

I carefully helped her, not wanting her to bend at the waist much and finished with zipping my sweatshirt over her before she cuddled back in my arms. There was a part of me that thought we were too fucking young to be dealing with this, yet soon we were going to be married so apparently we were old enough to deal with this. I couldn't seem to reason with my brain about anything; it was all too much.

We signed the release papers an hour later and she was discharged from the hospital with prescriptions to be filled.

We had to stop at the 24hr Pharmacy for a few things, and I realized that it was 2AM and I couldn't be more wide awake.

When we got home the front light was on, and walking through the front door I saw Alice sitting tiredly on the stairs with Emmett behind her rubbing his eyes as he yawned widely. My mom held a bag that had Bella's previous clothes, which were only her shirt and bra with a wet pair of jeans that the hospital had been nice enough to put in their washing machines.

She went towards the kitchen while I held Bella up, and immediately Alice and Emmett sprung up with their arms around Bella. Alice was whispering something into her ear and Emmett was patting her head and giving his apologies to his ' little sister'.

" I'm fine. I'm okay. Everybody just go back to sleep" she tried to assure, her voice weak, but when Emmett squeezed too tight she winced and I told him to let go. She was walking at an awkward angle and a somewhat limp with the pain of the cramps that seemed to have returned.

I carefully picked her up and took her upstairs. Alice came in the room with something known as a heated blanket. She laid it over Bella's lower half and it warmed up like a heating pad, the look of gratitude in Bella's eyes was clear.

" I don't know what this feels like but I know you probably think it's your fault that you didn't know. But it's not. We all are here for you Bella, you're family." Alice said quietly, leaning forward to hug her.

" Thanks, Alice."

My mom came in the room with a chilled drink for Bella.

" You have to stay hydrated so drink plenty, okay?"

" I'll get your medicine in an hour, it should be ready then." I told Bella, kissing her forehead as my mom sat at the end of the bed.

I noticed all fresh sheets, new comforter and everything. As if nothing had happened a few hours ago and I knew I had to thank Carlisle for this. It was more than I'd ever expect him to damn well do for me, or Bella for that fact.

" I know it won't help to hear this, but you know, I lost a baby when Edward was three years old." my mom started.

I'd known all about this when I was older, around thirteen when I asked my parents why they never had more kids after me. I'd always wanted a younger brother to play with; always feeling lonely although I had plenty of friends; having a little brother or sister would have been fun.

" I was three months along, we'd already told our families and we were so excited. And this happened just like with you; I'd woken up bleeding and had to go to the hospital. The doctors said sometimes that it just happens, but Edward my pregnancy with Edward was not a walk in the park. I had morning sickness for six months, I had preeclampsia and was on bed rest most of the time; seeing doctors every week. I had gone through twenty seven hours of labor a month before his due date, and almost had to get a c-section to get him out; we were both in danger and at one point the doctors were asking whether to save the baby or to save me. Luckily we were both alright and made it, and after that I was told if I ever got pregnant that having a miscarriage was in high chances. But once I found out I was, it was like I'd forgotten it all; I was so happy that Edward would have a sibling. We were hoping for a daughter."

Bella was crying quietly at this point, wiping her tears.

" We never found out, and it was very hard for me to accept what had happened. I blamed myself, thought I should have taken better care of myself but it wasn't my fault; just like this isn't your fault, Bella. Sometimes things have a funny way of working out, and I think maybe it was a sign saying that this is something you and Edward should be careful with."

She nodded in understanding, " I just...I wasn't worried about not being protected because I never thought I'd ever...I'd ever get pregnant."

" Nobody knew, sweetie. But I promise things will get better. I know it's hard losing something even though you never knew you had it, but we're all here for you. You're stuck with us like Alice implied."

A small laugh escaped Bella and Alice giggled from the edge of the bed.

I went into the bathroom and changed out of my jeans that I had put on in a rush and ran my hands over my face, sitting down on the closed toilet seat with my head in my hands.

All my mind could think was what next, I didn't know whether or not to sit and grieve or scream until my lungs gave out and my chest hurt. I gripped the edge of the counter top tightly and grinded my teeth together tensing up my entire body; trying to release my frustration and anger and some mystery feeling inside.

My heart felt like someone had punched their hand through it and was squeezing it like a stress ball, my joints ached and everything was just fucking wrong. Always fucking wrong when they needed to be right.

I turned the shower on and put it on almost the hottest temperature. I tore my clothes off and threw them on the floor before getting in the shower and leaned against the wall, taking deep breaths as the steam enveloped me and trapped in my lungs. I felt like I was in there forever until the door opened and I saw Bella standing there, a miserable look on her face and a towel in her hands.

I turned the water off and wrapped the towel around my waist without bothering to wipe my chest. The moment my feet hit the mat in front of the shower I wrapped my arms around Bella and my body shook even though my skin was hot, red from the water.

" Jesus Christ, were you trying to burn off a layer of your skin?" she whispered into my neck.

I ignored her question and instead pressed a reverent kiss to her neck, " I can't handle this anymore."

" What do you mean?"

" What if something happens to you? My god; Bella I love you so much you can't leave me." I gasped in desperation, all these insane thoughts that had been buried before coming to surface.

She held onto me tighter, " I'm right here, Edward. I'm always going to be here; I'll always make it through no matter what bullshit happens to me next...I really didn't fucking expect for you to be so upset."

" Let's be honest, okay? A baby wouldn't be ideal for us right now but I never wanted this to happen to you. We should have been more careful. I shouldn't have fucking touched you when I knew you were switching meds."

Bella pulled away and put her hands on either side of my neck, looking at me seriously.

" I don't regret any time we've ever been together. Edward, this could have been so much worse. It could have been like Esme. What if we'd known and started to get excited and buying things..."

I ran my fingers through her long hair, kissing her forehead and apologizing for getting her shirt all wet from my chest.

" Let's just go to bed, please? Em, was nice enough to get my meds and their making me tired."

" Em?"

She smiled, " Yeah, he has every name in the book for me so I figured I'd return the favor."

I grabbed the towel around my waist and dried off the rest of my body and hair before putting briefs on and getting into bed with Bella. She said she felt more comfortable now laying down then before. They had said it would be a week though until her body would fully finish it's fucking...process. I was only glad that they didn't have to do any surgery.

As I wrapped her up in my arms and held her closely, I didn't want to let go. I wanted everything in our lives to go back to normal. I wanted us to plan for the wedding and get fucking annoyed by Alice about how the seating arrangement has to go.

" I have to take the medicine every six hours, Esme set an alarm for me in the morning just in case." Bella whispered next to me,

" Okay." I mumbled into her mess of hair.

Suddenly something jumped onto the bed and I saw Zoey. She was very much enjoying all the space around here but mom was not enjoying the liter box in the laundry room. Zoey had grown a little since she before and her fur coat was thick and a silvery/white. She crawled up towards us and laid by Bella's neck, butting her head against it and curling up on her back with a playful gleam in her eyes. I reached over and tickled her stomach as she batted at my fingers, tickling Bella with the brushes of her fur.

After playing for just a few minutes the little fluff ball passed out behind Bella's head with her paw on Bella's neck, my favorite spot to lay. I glared as Bella cracked the smallest of smiles and I leaned up to tuck her head underneath my chin and pulled myself flush to her; never letting her go no matter what happened.

She slept fitfully, and when I heard the alarm go off for the first time I had watched the clock as it ticked towards it. Bella's body was in high alert, and I rested my hand on her shoulder to keep her laying down. I grabbed the bottle of medicine off the table, that Esme had gone to pick up for me, as she slowly sat up and gave her the drink that Esme had provided for her. Afterwards she curled up on my chest while Zoey stretched out along Bella's back with a yawn.

" What time is it?"

" Nine."

I half expected her to jump up and say we needed to get out of bed, but she only burrowed deeper into me,

" How do you feel?"

" It hurts." she quietly said, trying to curl her body up.

I rubbed her back and kissed the top of her head, knowing there was nothing I could do but hold and comfort my beautiful girl.

" The meds will kick in."

" They make me tired." she claimed, yawning.

" Sleep, my Bella."

**Authors Note- The reason this was l and was due to my mother being in the hospital, and myself having yet again, another episode of passing out in the same event, luckily no concussion this time guys.**

**So review, or don't review. I read all of them, but sending out responses has been so hard when I've had so much on my plate. I love you guys, a review would be nice, maybe just a smiley face to brighten up my day?**


	52. State of Grace

**Authors Note- Enjoy this early update surprise!**

**Disclaimer- S. Meyer owns all things Twilight.**

**Chapter Song- State of Grace by: Taylor Swift **

**If you guys love the new RED album review at the end of this chapter and let me know your favorite song! For my longtime reviewers, you know that so many new idea's for stories will appear :))**

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EPOV

~\\~

The next few days seemed to draw on and on. Bella spent most of them sleeping, eating or taking more medicine to take away the pain she was in. Her cramping seemed very severe as time went on, but Carlisle assured that it was only because her body was basically finding its own way to pass the embryo in order to get back to normal, because of the damage to her uterus and cervix it was probably a little more painful. I'd asked him if there should have been something else to do to maybe extract it, but this was the only way when she wasn't that far along anyways.

She was only really eating small amounts of food, but she was keeping herself well hydrated. I hadn't honestly seen her get emotionally upset yet, and I wasn't worried that she was going to be breaking down crying; although I could see the sadness in her eyes. It fucking killed me knowing I could do nothing about it.

" What if I hadn't smoked...Or drank coffee every morning and went on my usual runs."

" I told you that we can't go through all of the what-if's." I said, setting a bowl of beef barley soup in front of her as she sat at the kitchen table.

" Alice wants to do the final fitting on my dress tomorrow."

" Well, how are you feeling?"

She shrugged, " If I didn't have medication I'd probably be curled up on the floor right now. How long did Carlisle say?"

" Two to six weeks, but since you were only about a month and a half along it should be three at the most."

Bella nodded, " And then I guess we just move on with everything. It never happened."

" It's not going to be like that. We just have to be careful."

Picking up her spoon she said nothing else through her meal. Once she was finished I put everything in the dish washer and found her still sitting at the table with a blank look on her face. I walked over and grabbed both of her hands from her lap, lifting her body up. She was losing weight; I could see it, and she was having a hard time keeping things down as well. Her shirts were a little more baggy, and her jeans.

" I love you so much, and I know this is so hard for you to deal with because I feel the same way you do. I wonder what could have been done, too; but we can't focus on that...So many good things are happening right now in these moments. We're planning our wedding."

She smiled, and it was a true smile for once, " You're right."

" You're going to me Mrs. Edward Masen." I whispered into her ear, wrapping my arms around her waist and kissing underneath her ear.

" I hope you don't think I'm not excited about it...It's just hard with all this..." she sighed.

My fingers ran through her hair, " That's why you have me to remind you. And I'll remind you every single day if I have to."

Her warm lips pressed against mine for the first time in what felt like forever and I sighed, lifting her up onto the counter next to the stool she sat on so I didn't have to crane my neck for her tiny, short frame.

" No making out in the kitchen." Alice said, flicking the back of my neck and startling us.

I pulled away from Bella, still leaning into her as Alice wrapped a beach towel around her barely there bikini.

" Go put on some more clothing."

She scowled, " I happen to like this bathing suit, _dad_. Jasper is coming over, and Emmett and Rosalie are coming outside too. What about you guys, maybe just get some sun?"

" Yeah, sure." Bella said, surprising me and putting her arms around my neck to lift her off the counter. I set her down carefully and kissed the inside of her wrist.

We went upstairs and Bella put on a pair of shorts and a tank top, while I kept my regular skinny jeans on and put on a wife beater so I wouldn't be dying from the fucking heat. When we got outside it was just Alice and Jasper there, already in the pool fooling around. I sat down on a lounger that was reclined back and rested my hands on Bella's hips and pulled her down carefully to sit in my lap. We stretched out together, her back against my chest in the shade, enjoying the light breeze that went by.

" I get to go pick up my tux soon." I told her, rubbing her lower abdomen to help loosen her cramping. " This help?"

" Yeah." she said, resting her hands over mine

A half hour later she had passed out on me completely, curled up on her side between my legs and her left arm lifted up for her hand to wrap around my neck.

The rest of them were all fooling around the pool, water splashing around. Rosalie was the only one out of the pool, trying to get herself tan with what sun was actually shining through the random clouds. Surprisingly it was mostly clear out today.

" Why bother coming out here if all you're going to do is sleep?" Rosalie said, flipping a page in one of her magazines.

" Stop being such an insensitive bitch." I snapped at her, being quiet enough not to wake Bella.

" Excuse me? Don't call me a-"

" How the fuck would you feel if you miscarried a child you didn't know you were carrying, huh? Would everybody be on your back about what the fuck you do? No Rosalie, everybody would drop everything to dote on you; all Bella fucking has is me and my family, and I don't need you and you're comments so shove down your fucking throat before I do it for you." I whispered harshly.

Her eyes widened, " She had a miscarriage? Emmett didn-..." she broke off, looking away abruptly

She looked a little taken back, and I had figured Emmett had probably told her everything considering they basically blabbed everything to each other like an old married couple. I turned my head away and instead looked down at Bella. Rosalie had said nothing at this point, probably finally learning she took it a bit too far.

After about an hour nap I awoke Bella with placing small kisses up and down the curve of her neck. A small smile lit up her face and she snuggled against my shoulder and turned around to face me completely, kissing my neck and rubbing my shoulder.

" That was nice." she said with a yawn.

I rested my finger underneath her chin and brought her lips to mine, giving her slow, light kisses and nipping gently at her bottom lip. Her slender fingers slid into the bronze hair at the nape of my neck, pulling at the short hairs and sliding her other hand around my neck.

Her body was warm and soft – slightly more boney as well-; I couldn't help myself as I slid one of my hands into her back pockets and squeezed her supple ass.

A cool splash of water came sprinkling down on us and I slowly pulled away, leaning up to glare at a grinning Emmett.

" Can I help you?"

" Keep that shit in the bedroom with the door closed, brother."

Bella hid her face in my chest and I sat up, rolling my eyes at Emmett.

" Want to lay down inside or bring your medicine out here?"

" I think inside. I'm feeling nauseas." she said, resting her hand lightly on her stomach.

After going inside we went inside for Bella to take her medicine, and then she wanted to lay down and watch TV for a bit while I had offered to help Esme with random housework she wanted to be done so I did some vacuuming and cleaned the kitchen while she dusted and cleaned windows. I hadn't seen Bella come down so I assumed she probably passed out again, her medicine usually knocked her out anyways. I knew that I'd see her later anyways.

My mom talked about the wedding in between cleaning, and when the rest of them wandered in Alice was talking about the caterer and the appointments for setting up the little clearing where the ceremony was taking place as well as saying the linens for the tables that we are renting should be here any day. The chairs we were renting were white and they were made nicely and cushioned so there would be no need to decorate that any further.

We talked about flower arrangements, and the colors for the wedding were actually just really natural colors to match the settings, white, light greens and dark chocolate browns put together in an elegant and classy way, there were also just small touches of purple I saw Alice incorporate. We didn't want to do the typical black, white and red, or the white and tiffany blue; we just wanted to keep everything fucking simple.

Although Alice was rambling about crystals in the flower pieces and lace going over table clothes; It was nonsense, and I listened to placate her but all that mattered to me was that on August 13th Bella would be completely mine.

When my mom started on dinner I decided to head upstairs and saw Bella was completely passed out as I'd thought, her chest rising and falling and she'd also managed to take her shorts off and replaced them with a pair of her plaid sleep shorts. A movie was playing, but played on low. Her bottle of pills had been tipped over and a glass of water empty and a few pills had fallen. She'd probably already been sleepy after taking a nap in the warm heat. Her pills were also cut in half because the doctor wanted to slowly wean her off and soon her pain would be gone. I closed the bottle and climbed up on the bed, rousing her in the process.

" Hey...How long was I asleep?"

" A little over two hours."

I pressed myself up against her warm body, loving the feeling of her soft and warm from sleep.

" I feel like all I do is sleep."

" Your body heals that way." I told her, resting my forehead against the middle of her back.

She sighed, probably in agreement to my words.

" My mom is making a fruit salad and chicken kebabs for dinner."

" When do we go back to the doctor?"

" Next Monday."

I wrapped my left arm around her waist and kissed the back of her neck, she turned around in my arms and pressed her lips fully to mine, the feeling of her curves fitting against my body unleashed something inside of me and I wanted her _badly_. It felt like forever since we'd had sex when it had only been a week; I couldn't help myself with this beautiful woman.

I plunged my fingers into her chocolate waves and pulled her face to mine, kissing her long and deep. Her hand rested on my shoulder before snaking around my upper back and wrapping her arm around my neck.

" We have to stop." I said, pulling away from her.

She pulled away breathless, burying her face in my chest. I shifted my lower half away from her, not to bother her with my...problem.

" Sorry, I just needed to kiss you...Feel you." she sighed, nuzzling my chest.

My fingers stayed in her hair, running through the long strands that went to her waist. The plaid extra blankets were falling to her hips and I pulled them up around her, wanting her warm and comfortable; feeling safe.

" I'm right here."

Her hand wandered down to the hem of my t-shirt, moving it up so that she could feel the skin underneath. Fuck, she was driving me insane, as if that kiss wasn't enough. But I stilled, letting her roam with curious fingers over flesh that was familiar.

She tipped her head up and I gave her a chaste kiss once, twice, three times before resting my forehead against hers.

A knock on the door interrupted but we didn't shift. I didn't want to move.

" Dinner's ready downstairs, guys. Thought I'd let you know, but I think mom is bringing you guys food up here. I got tea for you, Bella." I heard Alice say before the sound of a mug hitting the table sounded and the scent of honey filled my bedroom. I turned my head to look at her.

" Thanks, Alice. And tell mom not to bother. I'll bring the food up for Bella."

She smiled and shut the door, leaving it open a crack how it had been.

" Don't leave, I don't need food; just you."

" I'll never leave you; and if I go I'll always come back."

~\\~

As the doctor finished the ultra-sound on Bella's stomach she set it down and started to write on the chart that was sitting on her lap before looking up at us, her face happy but still solemn because of the situation.

" Good news is that your body has passed everything as it should, we were worried considering the damage months and months back; and you seem all clear; though I'm so very sorry for your loss. Are you still bleeding?" she asked politely.

" Not anymore, no." Bella said as the nurse handed me a warm, wet towel to help Bella get the blue gel off her stomach.

" And cramping or discomfort in your lower abdominal area?"

She shook her head, " No, it seemed to go away completley about two days ago."

" Okay, let me have you stand up here."

Bella pushed her shirt down and sat up, hopping off of the exam table. The doctor asked her to bend down to touch her toes, asking if she felt any pain and had her do a few stretches before jotting everything down and having her lay back down on the exam table, pressing into her sides carefully. There was no wincing or noises coming from Bella so after closing up her file she smiled.

" Well, everything seems to be going well. I would refrain from any sexual activity for just another week and if you feel any pain during intercourse come back immediately. Since your first doctor told you to stop taking the birth control and only take the pain medication when you first came in, we would suggest staying protected for the next month as you start taking them again if you do have sex. We of course do not want you at risk for another miscarriage."

I rested my hand on Bella's lower back as she leaned into my side.

" Thank you, Dr. Sweeney." I said as Bella nodded in agreement.

She smiled, " Of course, and make sure when you get back into your usual routine you take it slow. You may feel better but for the next week just take it easy and you should be perfect. And don't forget what the nurse said when you first got here, okay?"

After standing and shaking both of our hands, she left the room and let us get ready to head out. I grabbed Bella's sweatshirt from the chair and her purse as well that she took from me.

" Well, everything seemed to go well." Bella sighed as I opened the door and led her out into the halls of the hospital.

" Except losing nine pounds. You're not even a hundred pounds, love." I said quietly to her.

When we got to the car I stopped at Starbucks to get her Chai Tea and a Peach and Raspberry with Yogurt Parfait for her to eat on the way home since we didn't have a chance to eat breakfast.

My hand rested on her leg as I drove, tracing patterns through denim.

" Are you okay?"

She glanced over at me, shrugging, " Yeah, as good as I can be; you know?"

" We'll get through it like we've gotten through everything else."

I stole a sip of her tea as I pulled up the driveway and got out to open her door. It was just another gloomy day in Forks, Washington, a light drizzle falling from the sky. When we got inside my mom was waiting to hear everything and was glad that everything was okay. It was a relief to hear it, and of course she wanted to celebrate by stuffing Bella with the banana bread she had baked this morning; especially after hearing all the weight she had lost.

It was visible, her body felt more frail in my arms then normal; but I wasn't going to fucking treat her like a doll, she would kick my ass for that and only get annoyed. She was a self-proclaimed bad-ass bitch.

But fuck I loved her.

~\\~

BPOV

~\\~

" I can't eat any more of Esme's nutritious meals, please get it away from me." I complained, leaning against Edward's now closed bedroom door as I rested a hand on my full stomach. I was sure that I couldn't even have a drop of water without completely throwing up.

Edward was lying across his lounger, reading a book with a very concentrated look on his face, I was sure he didn't even notice me come into the room. I slipped my sweatshirt off and walked across the room to shut the doors that was letting in humid air from outside, on top of it being really hot.

That did nothing to help the uncomfortably full feeling I felt.

Not only did Esme stuff me, but Alice was rambling over wedding details, and next weekend she wanted to do the final fitting on my dress. Unfortunately, my mom didn't get to help me pick out my dress, but during our spring break Esme and Alice had flown down and we had gone shopping in New York for my dress, it was being shipped to their store in Seattle so they had it. We'd pretty much gotten all the bases covered. Alice had a list of everything for the wedding and everything was basically checked off.

Angela and Jess were going to be coming with us next weekend to get the fitting for their bridesmaid dresses, which were both the same. Alice, since she was my maid of honor, had a dress that had just a little extra touch to it because she was the maid of honor and she deserved a beautiful dress as well.

I couldn't wait to see my dress; thinking about the wedding was the only thing that was keeping me going right now, and Edward.

I was trying my hardest not to think about...the miscarriage but I couldn't forget it. I could see it in Edward's eyes that he was just as upset by the events of everything as well, but I knew moving forward was the only option we had. With a sigh I turned around and went over to Edward; I took his book from his hands and straddled his waist playfully and lifted the book to see what it was he was reading.

" Interview with the Vampire? Hmm?"

He rested one hand on my hip and the other grabbed the book from my hands, closing it and setting it aside.

" Yes, now what was it about my mother feeding you?"

" I'm not going to fit into my dress with the way she keeps feeding me."

Edward chuckled, " You tried it on when you had the extra nine pounds, I bet in your fitting they might have to alter it, sweetheart, and not to make it bigger."

" I don't want to get fat."

" You'd have to be skinny first to get fat, babe." he teased as I leaned down to peck his lips while his hands moved over my waist, squeezing my sides and leaning up to return a chaste kiss, while unceremoniously looking down my shirt. Very smooth.

" What are you looking at?"

His hands started to move up further, " Nothing that doesn't already belong to me."

When he started to get up further I playfully slapped his hand away and ran my fingers through my hair to tame the wild brown curls.

" When we finally get to go on our honeymoon, it's a no clothes allowed trip."

He was completely keeping the destination a secret, and every time he mentioned it he knew it drove me absolutely insane because I was so curious as to where he was taking me. Nothing had been mentioned, not a single clue dropped about it. It was a secret well kept, I could give him that.

I heard a loud meow and a paw tapping at the door and hopped up to go let Zoey in, she loved running all around the Cullen house but her favorite place was curling up at the end of Edward's bed for her little naps. Emmett wasn't really fond of her, having an apparent bad experience with a cat attacking him as a kid, but Alice enjoyed buying little kitten bows and putting them in Zoey's hair, to which she would paw out and chew at much to Alice's dismay; it only gave her an excuse to go shopping for more.

In the evenings during dinner she would rub her body all over Carlisle's legs and lay in his lap if he was ever in the living room because there was something about men that she absolutely adored, and Esme was just okay with her being here with us. I'm pretty sure Esme just isn't a cat or dog, or hell, even an animal lover; but every morning she would put food in her bowl for breakfast and pat her on the head so I knew she didn't completely fucking hate her.

She's so goddamn adorable anyways. Nobody could hate Zo.

When I opened the door she pranced right in and hopped onto Edward's bed, going around in circles until she curled up at the end, paws tucked under her head and tail curled around her body. I gave her a pet before sitting at the end of the bed, interrupting her position and making her stand to rub against me. I picked her up and held her to my chest, petting the top of her head and kissing her tiny nose.

" Sweet girl." I hummed, scratching under her chin as she liked before setting her down, purring like a maniac.

" Think she'll be okay on the plane alone?" I asked Edward.

After the wedding we were obviously leaving for our honeymoon, no Zoey in tow because Esme and Carlisle said they'd take care of her, and after our honeymoon we'd be heading straight back to New York, and she was going to fly back to us, counter to counter though so she'd be more safe and not in cargo and then we'd pick her up at the airport.

I guess I just loved the fur-ball so much I worried about her.

" She'll be perfectly fine."

I laid back on the bed and sighed, " It's so hot in here."

Edward sat up, " Well, I could throw you in the pool or we could watch a movie in the basement, it's cooler down there. Sneak a beer or something."

" Movie sounds nice."

We headed downstairs to the Cullen's basement and went through all of the movies after going into the small movie room off to the side of the basement. We decided on watching the newest Friday the 13th, he was in the mood for a horror movie.

The beginning of the movie set it off to the actual plot line of a guy looking for his sister, and a bunch of teenagers going to some rich assholes lake house. The deaths were pretty intense, by the time we had gotten to the middle of the movie it was two guys sitting on the couch while the blonde girl danced around and I felt Edward's roaming from where it had been on my hip to around my stomach and then lower down to the waistband of my shorts.

I knew he was definitely in the mood, especially since I'd been out of commission for awhile, but it was still two days until we were cleared to even have sex, and even then the doctor said we should use condoms.

Before I knew it a sex scene had literally just came out of nowhere so fast, I'd been so caught up in Edward. It was graphic, the naked blonde on top of the jock, but holding a camera as she moved over him. It was erotic and I soon found myself rolled underneath Edward with his lips hot on mine as we heard the loud moaning in the background and the teenage kid rambling about the girl's tits.

Typical male.

Edward's hands were all over me, and before I knew it both of our shirts were off and my hands were clawing at his back as my tongue explored his mouth deeply, licking his bottom lip and sucking it into my mouth before biting.

When my hands fumbled for his belt he was grinding into me as I tried to push up, my head leaning back as his lips now went to my neck, sucking and licking furiously. I released the loose belt and moved my hands to his shoulders, my mouth falling open in the pleasure of his mouth on my neck. He moved down over my collarbone and kissed between my breasts and down to my navel, his teeth at the button of my shorts as he undid them and unzipped the zipper.

Then suddenly all the lights in the room turned on and I was blinded by the light that I barely had time to react to anything and cover myself before I heard Emmett's loud, booming voice.

" This is the MOVIE room, we watch MOVIES, here. Jesus Christ you horny motherfuckers."

Edward grabbed my t-shirt for me as Emmett stood at the end of the couch with a glare.

" And Edward, I don't want to know what the fuck you were doing with your head down so low." he said, shuddering as his eyes flicked to me then to the television.

" Nice boobs, Bella."

I tossed my tank top back on and Edward fixed his pants while I did the same with mine and he laid against my side.

" Don't stare at my fiancé's chest, Emmett."

" I can't really help it, I mean, they were just kind of looking nice in that bra; don't girl's like compliments?"

" Compliment your own girlfriend's boobs."

He shrugged and plopped down on the opposite couch, " You see, Eddie, fake ones are different than the real thing. Not as…soft and supple, ya know?""

" That's enough, Em." Edward said blandly before resting his head on the middle of my chest, as if he were trying to cover me up so nothing was showing.

" Hey, Em. Wanna feel them?"

I decided to play with him a little bit, what could I say. He was incredibly easy to mess with, and I knew that he would actually agree to it, although I knew Edward would probably think I was insane.

His eyes shot to mine, " Wha-What?"

" I said, do you want to feel them?"

" Bella, what the-"

I slapped Edward in the stomach and Emmett gulped before taking a deep breath, eyes flickering to Edward.

" Well, yeah, sure; I mean, if you're offering..."

I pulled down just the straps of the tank top and bra, not pushing anything down and sat at the edge of the couch. Emmett leaned forward, putting his hands out in front of him eagerly and when he got close enough I grabbed onto his shoulders and pushed him backwards before relaxing back against a laughing Edward and Emmett.

" What the hell?!"

" You think I'd let you feel me up?" I laughed

Emmett rolled his eyes, " That was mean."

" I can totally use this against you." Edward laughed.

" Don't you dare tell, Rose. She'll kill me."

Edward kissed my shoulders and pulled the straps up, grabbing the throw over the couch and wrapping me up in the blanket as we finished watching the movie.

His hand moved up and down my hip the entire time, it was soothing, comforting and eventually I felt myself falling asleep in his warm arms. I felt myself being roused by Edward about an hour later, the room was still dark and the credits on the television were rolling.

" Good nap?" He asked, kissing my forehead.

" It would be better if I was still sleeping." I teased in a tired voice.

" That blonde chick was hot; damn." I heard Emmett say as he took the movie out of the player and back in the case it had been in previously.

I heard the basement door open and small feet, followed by heavier ones, skipping down the stairs. Alice appeared in the middle of the room with a smile on her face.

" What are we watching?" she asked brightly as Jasper stood behind her.

" Hey, Jasper." I said politely.

" Hi, Bella..." he paused, " How have you been?"

I gave a small smile, " Good, yourself."

" Pretty good." he said, tickling Alice's side as she rambled off many romantic comedies that we had down here. Emmett riffled through the movies, ignoring Alice, and Alice sunk into the plush material of the overstuffed couch next to Edward and I.

" Mom said dinner should be done by the time we all finish watching a movie together." Alice said brightly.

" We are not watching Mean Girls." Emmett grumbled.

" It's a total classic!"

I rolled my eyes and Edward turned me into his chest and threw his long leg over both of mine to hold me in place."

" How about Nightmare Before Christmas? Oh wait, we've already got Jack Skellington over on the couch." Emmett joked.

Edward scoffed, " Heard that one, Em."

" What about Corpse Bride, you resemble that Victor character."

I smiled and hugged my fiancé's thin frame closely. Maybe he did look like a walking Tim Burton character but I loved him exactly the way that he was.

" Oh, Step Brothers! Fucking score, guys."

I more listened to the movie than actually watched it, and I dozed off multiple times, waking up to awkward funny moments including the line ' Stay golden, Ponyboy'. Edward's chest would rumble quietly with laughter every little while, but I knew he was being careful not to ' wake me' because I appeared asleep. I felt half asleep and half awake.

Esme called downstairs during the last ten minutes of the movie and we went upstairs immediately. Edward dragged me along next to him, tired and weary and wishing I could just keep sleeping. The doctors said it was normal, so I wasn't freaking out about wanting to sleep every moment of the day. Edward didn't seem to mind laying around with me also, I'd usually find him wrapped around me sleeping as well.

We went upstairs and enjoyed the dinner Esme had made for us, cleaning up afterwards. Carlisle wasn't around, so I assumed he was having a later night at the hospital.

" Oh, Bella, I want you to come upstairs with me!" Alice said after we finished putting all the dishes away.

I quirked my eyebrow at her, " Okay? For what?"

She smiled, " Well, I can't say it with Edward here."

I rolled my eyes and instead followed her upstairs to her bedroom where two boxes lay, one was a shoe box with a fancy designer name on it, and the next was a plain white box, flatter and smaller than the other one.

" They both just got here for the wedding, your shoes and your garter!" Alice said excitedly as she sat down on the bed. I sat down on the other side of the boxes as she smiled enthusiastically; and I was so glad that she was enjoying helping me out.

God knows I couldn't fucking do all of this alone.

She showed me the garter first, and it matched the beautiful ivory of my beautiful dress. It had lace in the middle and a ribbon around the thick lace band that was white with a little bow. I held it carefully and smiled, it was beautiful; honestly.

The next were the shoes and they were absolutely amazing. They were custom made by Christian Louboutin, a five inch pumps with a one inch platform and a closed toe. The shoe had an ivory lace overlay and matching Swarovski crystals on the toe and on the back that matched my dress too fucking perfectly; it was incredible.

" Wow, Alice, this is absolutely amazing thank you so much. Christ, I bet these cost more than the dress."

Alice just smirked and closed the box before setting the box that the garter was in on top of it.

" They are your something new." she informed me, " So, are you going to be able to do your fitting this weekend?"

I nodded, " Yeah, I'll be fine for it. Edward just doesn't ever want me out of his sights, you know?"

" What you guys have gone through while you've been together haven't exactly been things that are easy or things that most do go through. I mean, when Edward's lung collapsed, everything with your dad at Christmas and when he was in the hospital, then breaking up and then getting back together and then your accident, finding out new things about your parents, now all this...It's been a lot in just a few years, Bells."

She was right. We'd been through a lot of hell; but we'd made it out alive. And engaged.

" He's been too fucking perfect to me...I feel like sometimes I don't know how to pay him back."

" You've given him enough by loving him, Bella. That's all he's wanted. I mean, he was just so lost when I met him, you know? Everybody just looked at him like a bad kid doing awful things but I just thought it was his way of trying to find himself, trying to find something to fill a hole he had in his life after his parents got divorced. It wasn't until we moved here that I had actually seen him happy for once. I'd never seen him ever smile, or look at anybody the way he does at you. It was like after my dad found Esme...Emmett and I hadn't had a mom at all. I was just born when she was left and Emmett was still too young to remember anyways when she'd left. When they married it was like he was complete. He'd always been a great dad but there was always that look in his eyes, you know? That emptiness of not having that unconditional love from someone."

I couldn't help but smile, knowing that I had been someone to make another so happy, and knowing people could physically see it meant a lot to me.

" He did that for me, too, you know? I was just so fucked up about everything with my dad and Edward just...he made it all okay; he took away all the pain I felt inside."

" Everybody deserves to have a person like that." Alice said simply.

I gave her a hug before heading back downstairs to join Edward, thanking her for everything and for talking to me because I guess every once in awhile it was nice to talk to someone who had a different, but good perspective.

The Cullen's made me feel like family, and that alone made me more grateful than anything else.

**Authors Note- So, did you guys see Breaking Dawn Part 2?! I saw it last night at the 10PM showings, I tweeted a little, and I won't give out spoilers but oh my goodness that twist ending was AMAZING! I have to admit though, at the end I got a little teary. It's now come to an end, but enough with the sadness! If you've seen the movie tell me what you guys thought about it! I want to hear from all you guys!**


	53. Long Live

**Authors Note- I know it's been two weeks. Explanation below I promise. Love you guys!**

**Disclaimer- S. Meyer owns all things Twilight.**

**Chapter Song- Long Live by: Taylor Swift**

~\\~

BPOV

July 25th, 2010

Sunday

~\\~

" Oh my god, you look absolutely beautiful." Esme breathed as I stepped out of the dressing room and stood on the pedestal, wearing my heels and all. The lace lined veil falls over my shoulder and down my back, lying against my dress perfectly. Too fucking perfect.

When I looked into the mirror I couldn't even help the smile that spread over my face as I looked at my slim figure in this gorgeous dress. The neckline was strapless with a slight sweetheart neckline, so it showed a little bit of my cleavage, but not enough to be inappropriate for the wedding. The gown was a simple fit and flare mermaid dress. It absolutely fit my body like a glove, and then below my hip it flair out just slightly. The bodice was lace and had beautiful Swarovski crystals embroidered into the lace fabric. The train was what they would call chapel length and made out of English net and it had patterned tulle that had lace appliqué designs to match the dress. The tulle or net wasn't overdone; it was simple and flowed nicely to the floor.

The back of it dipped down slightly below my shoulder blades and hit just above the midpoint of my back in about fifteen little pearls that held the dress closed by the loops around then. The entire dress made me look just a little curvier, and I enjoyed the classic lace ivory look; it was more me. I didn't want the bright white Cinderella poufy shit.

When I had gone for my previous fitting last month it had been just slightly loose fitted because of my weight loss, so they took it in slightly, not completely so when I gained some of that weight back and came back for my last fitting it would be perfect, and it was. Damn, it was.

The lady who had altered the dress came in next to my consultant, Amy, who helped me into the dress and looked around to see if there was anything loose or too tight before stepping back to say I looked beautiful. They had a bag for the dress to go into, so when I slipped out of it Amy, who was too fucking nice, put it nicely into its dress bag while I changed into my clothes. I had just put on a little summer black dress from Hot Topic with three grey buttons that fitted at the top and flowed out mid thigh. I slipped my heels off and put on my flats before stepping out of the room and letting my hair down out of the ponytail it had been in.

After getting back from the Cullens, Alice had forced Edward into the kitchen so he couldn't see the dress, even though it was concealed in a white bag, while I hung it up in Alice's closet as she had told me to do, and Esme helped me with the shoes and put everything in place before going back downstairs.

I knew he already had his brand new tux in his closet, and I couldn't wait to see him in it. In less than three weeks we would be married, husband and wife and the excitement I felt over it was almost insane. There was a little bit of nervousness, but the happiness excelled over it.

" She's trying to steal you from me." Edward said, wrapping his arms around me tightly.

" No, she doesn't want you to see my dress." I corrected, quietly giggling as he nipped at my neck.

" It doesn't matter. Everything pales in comparison to you, beautiful."

I heard a fake gagging noise across the room and saw Emmett and Rosalie rolling their eyes at us. Unfortunately, by default, Rosalie was invited to the wedding as well, her parents, too. Her father had been quite nice, her mother on the other hand a frigid bitch like her daughter. The Whitlock's were also invited, too, because their parents were good family friends of Esme and Carlisle so we figured it would be nice to extend the offer; and we'd met them at Christmas time so it wasn't awkward to have them there. They were pretty nice.

I was nervous to meet Edward's other family though, like his two Aunts, and his cousins as well as older family friends from Chicago who were flying in. Apparently 'Crazy Mary' didn't want to miss his wedding, they were coming as well. So it was going to be a mess of Esme's side, Edward's dad's side, and his step-dad's side as well.

" Choking on something Emmett, or is it the extra weight on your lap making you wheeze." Edward said, straight faced before turning back to me and kissing me on my nose.

" Whatever." I heard Rosalie say in response, but her tone showed that it got to her.

In that moment Alice came down with a big, bright smile plastered on her face.

" We are going to have to have camera's set up for when you see her in her wedding dress. Even mom teared up a little." Alice said, perching herself on a stool.

" Wearing a dress? I'd just figured someone as butch as you, Bella, would just wear a raggedy old t-shirt and cut off shorts."

" Can you just shut up." I heard Emmett mumble before standing up and pushing her off his lap.

" What?" she said, talking more high pitched.

" Stop being so fucking high school. Edward's my brother, and Bella's my little sister. Keep your mouth shut unless it's to say something nice, Rosalie; it's so annoying to hear all of your little comments. You're clearly jealous as fuck and feel the need to demean everything to make yourself feel better."

" You've got to be kidding me? Jealous? Of her? And what about my little comments? Just last night you were saying that they were too young and things might get fucked up anyways."

Edward's head snapped towards Emmett, and then back to Rosalie as I just leaned into his chest and shook my head.

" You know what, to the both of you? Stop fucking talking about both of us! I'm sick and tired of this bullshit, and you are right, Emmett it's all high school. Grow the fuck up."

Rosalie stomped out of the room with her head down and I heard the loud slam of the front door. Emmett had whipped past us so fast I felt a slight wind behind me as he left the room and Alice stood on her perch on the island, lips pursed with her head shaking as mine did.

" I think they're just jealous, and Rosalie obviously just has issues."

I looked up at Edward and smiled curtly, " Ignore it. I don't want that bullshit going on, on my wedding day so just let it go. I love you."

" As I love you. You guys hungry? I was thinking about making burgers or something for lunch."

Alice and I agreed and everything else was forgotten.

After eating a good lunch Edward wanted to go for a swim before another storm was supposed to hit, so I joined him outside in a new dark purple bikini that I'd bought with Alice at Victoria's Secret. She required that new bathing suits were necessary for every single summer, although I disagreed; I went along to appease her.

Edward wore his trunks, and I saw him doing rigorous laps as I walked out. I saw his arms moving rapidly and his head come up for air every few seconds. When I got into the pool I used the steps before drifting into the water. He noticed me almost immediately and pushed his dark bronze hair back out of his face, wrapping his arms around me tightly. I held myself up using his shoulders and the tips of my hair floated on the top of the water, moving with me as Edward walked along the ground before falling back and our chests were pressed together.

The weight of my body almost pushed him underneath and I giggled and stood on my feet as he leaned up.

His arms went underneath the water, grabbing at my waist as he lifted me up, I screamed as he tossed me onto one of the single person rafts, grasping on tightly as suddenly it started to sink when he climbed up from the bottom. I squealed as he grabbed my leg, placing a kiss on it before crawling on top of my wet body with his own. Once he was fully on top of me I adjusted my legs and locked them around the back of his calves just as he grabbed my wrists, holding them above my head as our lips met in a fiery kiss. He used his free hand to tug through my hair, which was mostly dry on the top,

" Who do you think you are, hm? Looking so sinful in this scrap of fabric?"

" I love you." I giggled, running my fingers through his bronze hair after tugging them from his grasp, and then running them down his back, slick and warm from the slight bit of sun that peeked out and warmed him.

" I love this little ensemble." he growled, biting my chin lightly before working down to kiss my neck.

I pushed up and rolled us over into the water, completely enveloped in it and taking him completely by surprise. When we came up he wrestled with me around in the water, tickling, kissing and biting me.

" Edward!"

He kept his ministrations up until he finally relented and I swam around to the other side of the pool, watching him from across the way. I floated onto my back and looked up at the sky, gloomy with the sun showing every short while when the clouds would let it peak out. The pool was warm though, almost too warm around me, but it was comfortable.

Suddenly I felt to hands underneath me, holding me afloat and moving me around. It was nice to have a quiet afternoon to relax and just enjoy the heat of summer.

" You're so beautiful." he hummed, leaning down to kiss me chastely.

I floated up and wrapped around him, and he held me back, kissing the top of my wet hair.

" I can't wait until you are mine forever." it was almost a whisper, but I heard him.

Leaning back, I raised my hand to run through his thick, wet hair with a small smile.

" And I can't wait to be yours forever."

" Hey, guys- Bella's phone was ringing like crazy, when I answered it was Tiffany's; they said the wedding bands were ready." I heard Alice's tiny voice shout from the patio.

Edward and I looked up, still wrapped in each others arms. " Thanks, Alice." I yelled back at her as she hopped back into the house.

I kissed Edward's chin before getting out of the pool, letting him watch the view as I bent over to grab my beach towel, water dripping off of me. I wrapped the towel around me and sat on one of the loungers. Edward did a few laps in the pool before getting out and sitting on the lounger next to me, drying his hair off. I leaned back and relaxed, drying naturally.

After relaxing outside for a bit and planning on when to pick up the rings we went inside to take a shower, wanting to get the chlorine off of us, and my hair was already getting a weird texture from it; so after showering and getting dressed we hung around in his room to watch a movie. Alice and Jasper joined us ten minutes into watching Coraline, settling at the end of the bed because to be honest, the bed was big enough to fit about ten people in it essentially.

Edward passed out in the middle of the movie, fast asleep with his head turned into the pillow I laid on. The back of my hand rubbed back and forth on his arm, and I could feel his even breathing lightly on my cheek.

At the end of the movie, Jasper and Alice popped out of the room and I left a sleeping Edward in his bed after covering him with the thick gold blanket at the end of the bed. I went downstairs and spent some time with Esme, cutting up some vegetables for dinner and just talking.

" Are you nervous?"

I smiled, shaking my head, " No...I mean, I want to spend the rest of my life with him, and although we're young I just feel this is right."

" I can't wait." she said with a big grin, " Edward is going to be so incredibly shocked when he sees you in your dress."

After finishing cutting up the vegetables Esme put a slight bit of water on the bottom and a little butter and put the glass top of them to put in the microwave to steam.

" Speaking of that boy, where is he?"

" He fell asleep upstairs while we were watching a movie."

About an hour later Carlisle arrived home and dinner was just about done. I hadn't seen Edward, so I went upstairs to get him for dinner and saw him still passed out in bed. With my hand resting on his shoulder I leaned forward and kissed his unmoving lips.

" Hey, do you want to eat dinner?" I asked him quietly as he started to rouse.

He rolled over for his back to face me and sighed, his left arm falling off of the bed with his eyes still closed.

I ran my fingers through his hair gently, " Edward."

" Hmm?" he finally answered.

" Your mom has dinner ready, do you want to eat?"

" I'll eat later." he sighed, snuggling into the pillow and blankets.

My fingers found his hair again, " Okay, sweetheart." I said quietly, kissing the back of his head before getting off the bed and heading downstairs.

I enjoyed dinner with the Cullen's, and Jasper had also joined us in place of Emmett, who was currently at Rosalie's and most likely avoiding us for now. Dinner was really good and light, and afterward we cleaned up as per usual and then Esme brought out her homemade peach ice-cream for us to enjoy, and it was really creamy and delicious.

Everybody seemed to disperse afterwards so I wandered upstairs to find Edward still asleep. I grabbed my laptop and opened up my e-mail to find one from my mom. I hadn't talked on the phone with her in a little while, but we were going back and forth with e-mails about the wedding and her and Phil were going to be flying in the tenth of August, so she let me know all of that information in this current e-mail, so I e-mailed her back quickly before throwing out any other junk mail and shutting my laptop down.

I toyed around with my phone for a bit until I was taken by surprise when Edward rolled around and turned into my side, his arm draping over my stomach.

" Hey, nice nap?"

He nodded, rubbing his eyes, " I feel like I needed that."

I set my phone down and turned towards him, " Now you're just going to be up all night."

" If you've failed to remember we used to be up until three in the morning, until we became boring college students sleeping before midnight unless we're taking tests."

" Do you got any...?"

His eyes narrowed, " Seriously?"

" Yeah. Don't tell me you and James-"

" I've got some, baby." he said, rolling to the other side of the bed where he specifically kept his medicine, a white box and usually his cigarette's and any pot that he had.

The blunts were already rolled up, sealed and everything so all we did was light them up and open up his doors so that it would air out in the room. I took a long puff and held it in for a minute, relishing in not having this feeling in so fucking long. My body sunk backwards as I took long, slow drags until we were at the end. It took me about two to be actually somewhat baked, as for Edward, about three and it was the strongest. So, we used five total and shared the fifth until we were in a haze and the room was blending colors,

" Edward, I'm sinking into the mattress." I giggled as I held onto his arm, my body falling deeply in.

He rolled over, his eyes big and wide; green and beautiful. I laughed.

" Fuck, this feel so good. I feel weightless." He sighed, laughing quietly at the end before getting off the bed.

" I feel like a sack of bricks, Edward, help!"

Edward laughed and grabbed my ankles, pulling me up towards him as I sunk in head first. Before I was deeply in, he lifted me up into his arms and I felt weightless just as he had.

" Oh, goddamn. So relaxing." he sighed, sinking into the chair in the bedroom.

My legs were straddling his thighs and I leaned forward, resting my chin on his shoulder.

" Mmm, I was thinking we could do that a little later." he whispered in my ear.

I leaned back, " What?! I'm not trying to have sex with you!" I yelled, trying to get off his lap and tripping backwards, laughing as I hit the floor and banged my head on the soft part of the mattress.

" I'm fucking starving." he groaned, lifting himself up before walking to the door.

" Edward, what if someone is downstairs?" I whispered in a laugh.

" Well, fuck me. I guess we'll see."

~\\~

Though our high wound down the heat in the room went up and I found myself underneath Edward at two in the morning, trying to keep quiet. He rocked his body and moved it like I'd never seen before, his mouth at my neck biting almost furiously.

" Edward, fuck I'm going to have so many bite marks. Don't try to eat me." I laughed, rolling my hips.

When he pulled away I saw a drop of blood on his lips that I had licked off immediately and wrapped my arms around his neck, pulling his mouth to mine. He tasted like pot, cigarettes, coca-cola and mint. He kissed down my collarbone and moved his bare body against my equally as naked body, and I saw stars behind my eyes.

Soon we had both reached our point and he collapsed next to me, panting heavily.

" What are you panting for, I was doing all the heavy lifting?" I laughed, pushing his shoulder.

He growled and rolled back on top of me, his entire body weight heavily on me.

" Ugh, get off." I whined, using all my strength to push him off of me.

" I already did." he whispered in my ear.

I rolled my eyes at him and covered up with the blanket, leaning back into the hundreds of pillows behind me as I stared up at the ceiling. Edward ended up wrapped around me hugging me closely to his body.

" What?" he asked as I looked down.

" You're so clingy."

He laughed, " No, I'm not."

" Yeah."

" Fuck, no."

" Yes!"

" This is my bed, I do what the fuck I want."

When I rolled onto my back he pulled himself flush to my side with his arm around me. I turned my head and pecked his lips.

" Mm, that's it?"

I reached my arm around him and ran his fingers through his hair, " We should save our real kiss for the wedding."

" Are you, Isabella Swan, actually getting excited?"

" What made you think I was never excited?"

He ran his finger down my arm, " I know things have been hard since...I'm just glad you can be happy about the wedding now."

" Edward, I was never dreading marrying you; if there was one moment of being unsure or uncertain I wouldn't have said yes to you. I want to spend every single moment of my life with you."

A smile incomparable to what I've ever seen spread over his face and he pulled me against his chest, holding me impossibly tight.

" You're so amazing. I have no fucking clue what my life would be if I didn't find you."

" Boring, lonely, sexless, lonely..."

" Sexless? I could find someone."

I glared up at him, digging my fingers into his ribs.

" What was that?"

He moved uncomfortably, his face contorting as my fingers moved and he started to laugh from being tickled, " No sex if it wasn't for you."

I slapped his arm, " That's right."

" Well, I'll admit; it wouldn't be good sex."

" How do you really know, though?"

" Don't you know that you've found like 'the one' when the sex is mind-blowing?"

I couldn't help but laugh at him, he was so cute, or maybe that was the wrong word considering we were having a sexual conversation; but it was pretty funny anyways.

" Mind-blowing, amazing, sexy..." he continued as I laughed quietly at him.

" I was thinking more that it's when you feel the sparks, the fire when you touch that person. Understanding them even when they can't understand themselves; just knowing." I whispered quietly, pressing a soft kiss to his cheek.

He rolled over so that I was laying on the other side of him, " I think it's the sex."

Knowing it was still the high talking, my eyes rolled and I just closed them and snuggled into his chest. His hands wandered all over my body, to my back, over my hips to my butt and thighs before moving all the way back up. Fingers tangled in long curled brown hair, gently tugging and twirling.

" So beautiful." he whispered.

He kissed my jaw slowly before dragging his lips down to my throat and resting his hand on my upper back, moving down to the middle to arch my back towards him.

" Mm." I sighed, just loving the feeling of his lips and hands on my skin.

He placed firm kisses on my throat, still being gentle at the same time as his hands slid over my back, lingering near the clasp of my bra.

I massaged his scalp, my fingers running through his bronze hair and holding him to me, kissing his temple softly.

" You're beautiful." He stated, " So soft and warm."

My eyes closed and I tipped my head back with a contented sigh. Before I knew it I was the one falling asleep, the last thing I could comprehend were his lips moving over my collarbone.

~\\~

It had felt like I had awoke the same way I'd fallen asleep, lips on my skin. This time they were behind me and on my shoulders and the back of my neck. I sighed and rolled away from the touch, craving more sleep. I rolled into a fluffy comforter and snuggled into it, feeling my chest bare against the fabric and enjoying the feel of nothing between it.

When a single finger dragged down my spine a chill ran through me and I arched my back and whined.

" You fell asleep on me last night." a sleepy voice said close to my ear.

" Tired."

" I didn't realize you were asleep until I tried for another round."

A smile spread over my face and I hugged the comforter to my chest, burying my face in it as well as Edward snuggled into me from behind, and I also felt another part of him pressed against my back...

I turned myself around and wrapped my arms around his warm, sleepy body. It was the best feeling. His arms wrapped around my waist tightly, sighing into my neck and placing tiny kisses in the same places. It was pure bliss.

" Maybe I should attempt to sue you for almost rape."

He laughed into my neck and I smiled.

" You think so?"

" Maybe." I yawned.

Edward shifted us so that I was smuggled into his chest, arms draped around each other, and he moved the comforter down to stroke the bare skin of my back; my body completely melting. The room was only slightly light, meaning it was probably very early morning and we could get some more sleep, and it did sound very appealing to get a few more-

" Bella, Edward! We have- Ugh, really, guys? You can't just put your clothes on when you're finished getting your groove on?!"

Edward sat up, alarmed at Alice's sudden burst into his bedroom. Again…

" Alice! Jesus, fuck! What do you need?"

" My eyes are covered. I'm having a problem with some of the linens on back-order for the tables and napkins. It said they might not arrive until the END of August. We've got to go out immediately to get everything and make sure it's in good quality so I was thinking we could head out to-"

" I'm going to say this once- do not come into my room anytime before nine if I haven't come out yet, and anytime after that you KNOCK and wait for me to tell you that you can enter. We will take care of wedding linens later. Goodnight."

" But, Edw-"

He laid back down next to where I'd covered myself up.

" I said goodnight, Alice.

I heard her sigh before the door shut and we were alone. Two hours later I was awoken to the smell of coffee, and it was almost like a siren. When I rolled over on the bed I realized that Edward had put one of his soft, thin flannel plaid button-up shirts on me. It was cozy and warm, but not too warm. On the other side of the room Edward was sitting in a chair in his pajamas, hair insane, on his computer with a cup of coffee on the table next to him. I smiled in his direction before grabbing the cup and sipping on the surprisingly still hot coffee on the end table next to the bed. I sipped at it until it was warmer and I took larger gulps.

Perfect amount of cream, sugar and everything. When the mug was empty I laid back with a full, warm stomach and sighed deeply, snuggling into one of the pillows and facing Edward. He looked at me from above his laptop and smiled.

" Sleep good, angel?" he asked.

I blinked slowly and nodded sleepily, running my fingers through my long curled hair.

He got up from his chair, closing the laptop he had on his lap previously before walking over to me, running his own fingers through my hair.

" I love the way you look when you wake up, sleepy, warm..." he trailed off, crawling onto the bed before finishing, " Inviting..."

Lips met mine in a slow kiss and I felt him exhale against my philtrum, warm breath spread over my cheeks. I pulled him down to the bed with me and felt his hand on my upper thigh, kissing me slowly but deeply, tilting my head to the side.

When I pulled away he was smiling, his fingers tangled in my hair.

" I talked to Alice and told her to take care of the linens, so her and Esme ran out to go to some fancy fucking store."

" Edward, they shouldn't have to-"

He interrupted, " Trust me, they were more than happy to go out. They are just living for all of this wedding shit, so I let them go ahead. Carlisle is at work, Emmett got up for a morning workout. We're all alone."

I felt his hand rubbing my skin over the fabric of his button up I wore, before moving down to cup my ass, covered by a pair of simple underwear.

" You're feeling a little frisky this morning, hm?"

After fooling around in bed for awhile I got out to take a shower, Edward joined me and afterwards I didn't bother to dress up in anything other than loungewear; since it was pouring outside I wasn't planning on going out. I put on a pair of black yoga capri leggings with a long tank top over it, leaving my hair to dry natural and not bothering with much makeup.

We ate lunch since it was more afternoon-ish time and lounged around in the family room with Edward watching movies, listening to the tapping of the insistent rain on the roof and windows. He held me closely, and for some reason I was still tired and fell asleep in his arms in the middle of a movie.

I was awoken when Esme and Alice arrived back, and they were bouncing around all excited about what they had found for the tables, and apparently had gotten a good deal; though they'd spent hundreds on just table linens, napkins and etc.

I almost face-palmed.

" We got just the perfect ivory color Bella, and it's lined with just an inch of lace; it's so gorgeous, look!" Alice said, sitting on the coffee table in front of me to show me closer. The fabric was soft and it was perfect; I knew that they only would get the best and I loved both Esme and Alice for doing this for us.

Esme showed me the napkins, showing me the dark chocolate brown color and then the light green color which was smaller to go on top of it. Around the napkins we were setting the silverware on it and then lightly using a ribbon around it that was custom made to the date of the wedding with our names on it; which was absolutely insane that someone could do that.

" It's all beautiful, thank you guys so much for going out and doing this for us."

Esme and Alice both smiled.

" It was fun." Alice said excitedly.

Esme kissed my forehead and ran her fingers through her son's mess of a hair.

" You'd better get that hair nice for the wedding."

I laid my head on the couch and laughed, " I think he likes it sticking up everywhere."

" Soon it will be flat to your ears, Edward Anthony." Esme said, kissing the top of his head before standing with the bag of linens and going into the kitchen.

My fingers ran over the stubble on his chin and jaw, smiling at his rugged features.

" I'll shave, too." he said in a playful annoying tone.

" I like your scruff." I said, leaning up to kiss him softly, feeling the course hairs against my cheek.

He hummed into my mouth, cupping my face in his hand and deepening our kiss. His warm, velvet tongue slipped into my mouth, sliding against my own and making me moan quietly into his mouth. The room felt warm and Edward had shed his hoodie before, it laying bunched near our waists.

" Excuse you!" I heard Esme exclaim before Edward got a smack on the back of his head with a magazine.

He pulled away from me, and I could still taste him in my mouth, mint and spice.

Edward rubbed the back of his head and glared at his mother, who sat herself comfortably in the chair as she flipped through her magazine carelessly.

" Love you, too, mom." he groaned, laying back down with me and pulling me against his chest as I giggled quietly to myself.

" No kissing in the living room."

I felt his lips touch my forehead with a loud smack, then both of my cheeks, my chin and finally my lips.

" Edward Masen..."

" Esme Cullen..."

" Bella Swan." I added in, trying to add to the hilarity.

Hands dug into my side, making me laugh as Edward started to tickle me uncontrollably. I screamed at him to stop and felt my sides' cramp from the laughter but his hands wouldn't relent. I soon found myself landing with a thump on the floor, Edward on top of me as he tickled my sides and ignored my scratching at his arms to stop.

When he stopped he got back up on the couch and I stood, smacking his chest and poking at his ribs, but he was strong enough to grab my hands to make me stop as I wrestled around him to grab at him.

" You two are just something else." Esme said with a slight chuckle at the end, still looking at her magazine.

" You aren't going to get me." Edward struggled to say as he grabbed my rapidly moving hands.

" How do you stand it, ma? I already want to shoot myself in the head looking at them." I heard Emmett say, entering the room suddenly.

Edward wrapped his arms around my waist and mine went around his neck, his chin resting on my collarbone.

" It's called love, sweetheart."

My forehead leaned against Edward's and he kissed my nose, a smile still on his beautiful face.

**Authors Note-**

**So let's be honest here, I didn't even realize it's been two weeks since I've updated! With Christmas coming up I've been trying to get my shopping done and out of the way, as well as juggling classes, working and I've been actually writing chapters for this story, which makes no sense how I lost so much time when I'm working on chapter 57 of this story! I can say now that I am sure we are ending The Story of Us with 60 Chapters, I have the need for even numbers. **

**In addition to that, I HAVE LINKS! Links to Bella's Wedding Band, Dress and yeah, it's all on my profile so check it out, her dress is GORGEOUS. I'd like to think so. Thank you everybody for the reviews for last chapter, so many of you were so sweet; I'm sorry the review replies have been on the backburner for right now! But I reach each and every single review and thank you all for the sweet words, you're all amazing!**

**Review if you'd like, give me your thoughts!**


	54. Starlight

**Authors Note- Hello, everybody! So, as you will read on this chapter was extremely important and crucial for me to write in a way that I would be proud. It took a lot out of me. I would've updated sooner, but with my OCD tendencies about this chapter and also attending school and doing finals on top of working I have been extremely busy. But enough of my blabber! Read on!**

**Disclaimer- S. Meyer owns all things Twilight.**

**Chapter Song- Starlight by: Taylor Swift (This song is just so beautiful)**

_Isabella Marie Swan_

_and_

_Edward Anthony Masen_

_Together with their families_

_Request the honor of your presence_

_At the celebration of their marriage_

_Saturday, the Thirteenth of August_

_Two Thousand and Ten_

_Five O'Clock in the Evening_

_420 Woodcroft Ave._

_Forks, WA_

~\\~

BPOV

August 13th

~\\~

Awaking in the morning I knew immediately that Edward wasn't in the bed next to me as he had been last night. We had spent most of the night with the Cullen's and my Mom, as well as Phil, before retiring into bed and curling up together. I also realized that the sun was actually shining through Edward's floor to ceiling windows.

The days leading up to the wedding had been a hectic whirlwind of activity in the Cullen household, and while I felt nervous, I knew that spending the rest of my life with Edward; the mere thought, filled me up with love and sheer happiness. It got me through the last minute details needed to be made and tying up any loose threads.

I was the happiest I'd ever been in my fucking life.

I rolled over and buried myself in his pillow, breathing in his scent and found a note, as well as a single red rose lying on the bed next to where I was laying. I lifted the rose up and could smell the sweet essence of it, a smile spread over my face just knowing he'd probably went down into Esme's flower garden just to get this for me.

When I grabbed the note it was folded once over, and as I opened it I saw his beautiful script before me.

_Good Morning, Angel_

_I wanted to be here when you'd awake but Emmett_

_had woken me up to go to Jasper's in order for us_

_to get ready for the wedding. Alice, Esme and Renee_

_are around the house somewhere. I love you my beautiful_

_Angel, and I can't wait to marry you._

_Yours Forever,_

_ Edward_

I laid in bed for just a little while, relishing in the warm sheets before rolling out of bed. I wrapped a robe around me, covering up my shorts and tank top while I padded downstairs to see what was going on. It was only ten, meaning there was seven hours left until the ceremony would be beginning.

I heard voices as I got further downstairs, and when I reached the kitchen I saw Esme, Alice, Jessica, Angela and my mother in the kitchen sitting in different places of the kitchen with mugs of coffee, and there were muffins and other breakfast foods on the island in the middle of the kitchen.

When they saw me it was like I was the fucking queen of England, everybody stood up with bright smiles on their faces. My mom ran to hug me and I could almost sense to tears about to fall from her eyes.

" Oh, my baby is getting married today." she said, her arms tight around my neck.

I patted her arm and smiled, " Don't cry, mom."

She pulled back and wiped her eyes as Jess wrapped her arm around my neck.

" Ange and I knew she was going to marry him the moment she left that party at our friends to hang out with him, Mrs. D." Jess laughed, resting her head on my shoulder.

I rolled my eyes and Alice hopped down from her stool, giving me a once over.

" Good, you got some sleep. Bags underneath your eyes would not be good for today!" Alice said with a smile, giving me a quick hug before finishing up her blueberry muffin.

" Well, you did awake a little late; was someone wearing you out last night so you'd get some good sleep?" Jess said.

My hands shoved her off of me and I scowled, " Excuse you."

She laughed, as did everybody else in the room.

" If it weren't for his mom and your mom you'd totally divulge." She said, sitting back in her chair next to Alice.

" Oh, sweetheart, you can talk about your sex life with me." My mom assured me, smiling.

No fucking way was I going to be telling my mother, and Esme especially, about my sex life with Edward.

" I'll take a pass on that." I mumbled, pouring myself of coffee and putting cream and sugar in it.

" In an hour we are heading over to the spa again! You are getting a manicure and pedicure this time, and just us girls are getting manicures."

" Why aren't you guys gett-"

" You're the bride, you get more attention, and plus, us girls did our toes this morning all nice and pretty for the wedding. Oh, and we've set up a facial too!"

Well, I knew that this had been much better than two days ago when we'd went to the spa and I had gotten waxed. Every-fucking-where.

Not only had Alice coerced me into getting a brazillion, but I'd gotten my legs waxed as well as my eyebrows. And while getting my legs waxed wasn't exactly a walk in the park, they felt incredibly smooth and it was assured that I wouldn't have to worry about shaving at all for the next month or so; which was nice for the honeymoon. The brazillion however was dreadful, I usually took care of everything myself but Alice being Alice convinced me, at least it was a lady doing it, but I had to put a special soothing lotion on because of the harsh burn.

After enjoying coffee and breakfast I just put on a pair of different shorts and a t-shirt to go to the spa, and a pair of flip flops. We had taken Edward's Volvo, that apparently on his terms only I was allowed to drive, and headed over to the spa.

First I'd gotten my nails done in a simple French manicure, and I was glad my nails were nicely grown out, so all the lady had to do was slightly file them before painting on the white tips and putting on a shiny coating to make them look glossy.

I had to admit, even though I tried to act like I hated all the fucking girly shit like getting nails done and what-not, the pedicure following the manicure was amazing. By the time my small foot was lifted from the hot bubbly bath they had put on a softening lotion, even though I took well good care of my skin, and started a French pedicure on my feet, doing the same with my feet when they were finished by ending with a gloss to make them all shiny and pretty.

We had to stay a little while my toes dried and Angela was still getting her nails done. Since there were only three people doing nails here and there were other customers so it took a little time. We were out of there by a quarter to one and headed back to the house. When I pulled up, Emmett's car was there and Alice had fire in her eyes when I looked at her.

" He'd better not be in there! You can't see the bride before the wedding."

" Correction, you can't see the bride _in her wedding dress _before the wedding." I said, turning the car off and hopping out.

When I got inside I heard the guys in the kitchen and knew that they had to be eating the remnants of the breakfast we had left behind. The moment I turned the corner I saw Edward by the fridge wearing jeans and a white t-shirt. He came to me and wrapped his arms around my waist, kissing the side of my neck while Alice yelled in the background.

" Emmett forgot his suit."

" You guys left at nine in the morning and NOW you realized you forgot your suit?!"

" We were having a little bachelor party, playing video games, talking shit, drinking beer; cut us some slack, woman! We're heading out right now!"

Edward kept his hold on me and leaned down to kiss me but Alice tugged him away and shoved him in the direction of the front door.

" No kissing until everything is official. Out of my sight, now!"

The boys all ran out of the house and I had to roll my eyes. Alice sighed annoyingly before looking at the clock and seeing that it was one.

" Oh my god! Only four hours to get ready! Okay, upstairs, upstairs right now Bella!" Alice said, grabbing my manicured hand and leading me upstairs.

I was not looking forward to the next four hours.

~\\~

Alice had her hair in hot rollers, which had to stay in for thirty minutes, while she did her makeup and Angela had gotten started on my hair. I said I could do this myself but everybody insisted otherwise. Angela already had her make-up done, and Esme and Jess were doing there's as well somewhere in the house; I wasn't exactly sure where. But I was in Esme's bathroom, which was absolutely huge. The mirrors and bright lights with long marble counter tops and double sinks. It was immaculate.

Angela was using a curling wand on my long hair, curling it in one to two inch sections. Yesterday Edward had interrupted Alice's plans on what she was going to do for an up-do, but Edward piped in his two cents and said he wanted my hair to be down; no exceptions.

After my hair was curled, and Alice was done with her makeup and hot rollers, she had to let her hair sit so it would loosen up, and started to work on my curled hair, we used a light hairspray so that during the ceremony it was going to be long and bouncy, but during the reception it would loosen up just a little into pretty long waves during the night.

Alice was doing some type of elaborate twist/braid on either side of my hair and holding them in with pins, using hairspray to make sure my bangs wouldn't come out.

When she started on my makeup, she had a sour look on her face while she was doing a light foundation and blending it in so that my skin tone would be even.

" What's the face for?" I asked her.

She sighed, " Bella, can I just ask one thing?"

I furrowed my brows, " What is it Alice?"

" Take out the lip ring."

" What?! No fucking way!"

" Bella, be reasonable!"

I glared at her, " You realize there's going to be a hole right below my lip if we did that, right?!"

Esme was in the room, already completely dressed with my mother next to her. Esme had kept her hair down with loose waves and one side was pinned back to show her natural face makeup. She wore a pretty one shoulder dress that was floor length and a dusty purple color with a v-neck. It was beautiful, honestly. She looked gorgeous. My mother as well wore a purple dress, but it went just to her knee's with a scoop neck, and it was a royal purple. Her hair was swept up and her face was fresh and natural, just like Esme.

I could see her tearing up a little seeing my hair being done while I sat in a bathrobe in front of the mirror with Alice behind me and Angela trying to keep the arguments neutral.

" Ladies, what's the problem?" My mom asked.

" She won't take out the lip ring. Just for the night, Bella; please, please."

I sighed and looked down, " Alice, it's part of who I am, I'm not going to just take out my piercings and hide them with my hair." I said, pausing to prove how Alice had taken strands out from the sides of my hair to cover my industrial bar by moving my hair aside to expose it. " Just to show everybody that I look like the societies view of proper? It stays in."

She sighed before setting a powder on my face and Esme was smiling, taking a seat on the edge of her tub.

The rest of everything else was a whirlwind. Alice had finished my makeup, doing a very light smoky eye and keeping my lips a pretty pink nude color with just a hint of blush. My skin looked flawless and everything was perfect. My hair flowed down my back, two intricate braids twisted behind my head to keep it out of my face for the night.

My dress was laid out on Esme and Carlisle's bed looking absolutely perfect. The girls left so I could put on my underwear, and I had picked out a white lace underwear set with a white lace thong, which was cotton with the lace overlay, like the matching bra. The dress didn't give me complete support, so when I found the strapless bra set I was pleased.

Afterwards Alice and Jess both helped to fasten all the buttons on my dress, and we'd almost forgotten the garter but Esme had reminded us and I quickly tugged it up my leg and smoothed my dress out in front of me before stepping back and looking in the long mirror that covered the closet in their master bedroom.

I'd never sat in front of a mirror and called myself beautiful, I always thought of myself as average, maybe somewhat pretty; but looking at myself now, I did feel beautiful, and I let out a shaky breath as I looked at myself. My mother stood behind me, placing the veil in my hair as the finishing touch.

" You look amazing." Jess said with a bright smile.

" I have to slip into my dress, I'll be right back!" Alice told us before disappearing from the room.

Angela and Jessica's dresses were a light green color, almost mint but not quite, they were floor length with a slit up the side and strapless with a sweetheart neckline. There were little crystals at the hip that gathered the fabric and added a little extra touch, but they were still simple and looked gorgeous on both of them. Their hair was both in messy buns, and they had on matching cream colored heels.

Speaking off, I grabbed the box off of Esme's bed and took a seat. My mom handed me each shoe and I slipped them on effortlessly; I'd worn heels this high, but not exactly walking on a trail in a forest. I'd only hope not to fall and bust my shit.

" Wow, these are something else." My mom said, admiring the shoe as she handed the last one to me and I slipped it on.

When I stood I had an extra five inches on my actual height, luckily the platform was one inch so it felt only like a four inch heel, what I walked in usually in my boots or regular heels.

Alice returned about five minutes later in her dress, and it was in a deep beautiful almost golden-y brown color. It clung at the bodice and then poufed out at the hip, not obnoxiously, and went above her knee's just a few short inches. It had crystals on it as well at the hip for embellishment, matching the bridesmaid dresses, and a sweetheart neckline. Her shoes were cream, just like the girls, but a different style. In her hands I saw her holding a jewelry box, and it was square shaped and quite large.

" It's already four fifty, we need to start heading down. But first, Edward requested this be delivered to his bride." Alice said, handing me the box.

I opened it and inside I saw a delicate chain necklace with a silver heart pendent that was outlined in small little diamonds, in the middle held the wedding date, and on the back it was engraved to say ' I promise to love you forever, My dearest Isabella. Always yours, Edward' in small elegant lettering. Tears welled up in my eyes and my mom took it from me and fastened it around my neck.

" Perfect."

" Okay, okay! We need to get downstairs! Let's go ladies." Alice ushered as we all shuffled out, careful not to step on my dress.

My heart was thumping in my chest, and so many thoughts ran through my head.

Would Charlie be there, Sue, Leah, Jake and Seth? Would Blake be there with his gorgeous wife? I clutched my mother's hand as she helped me down the stairs and we stepped through to the backyard. I could hear voices past the trees and knew there were guests seated and waiting. My mom kissed my cheek and looked me in the eyes with a teary smile.

" I love you, baby."

" I love you, too, mom." I said, leaning forward to hug her quickly before her and Esme scurried off to be seated.

When it was five o'clock, everything started. I could hear the light music in the background starting as we walked down the trail, Angela, Jess and Alice by my side. Emmett was one of the groomsmen so we had found him waiting for us at the edge to walk down the aisle with Jess to go first, and Angela was next to walk down the aisle with James, who gave me a wink and a smile before stepping through the moss tree, moving the branch to clear. I couldn't see much around me yet but the beautiful lights that lit up the area as twilight started to descend on us.

Alice stood next to Edward Sr., who hugged me before walking down the aisle with her and then I knew it was my turn. I slightly lifted my dress as I moved around the mossy tree and was enveloped in something so beautiful it took my breath away.

The tree's were hung with real flowers and tea-candles and twinkle lights. The seats were on either side and each at the back were covered in fabric in a bow-like shape. The aisle was in the same ivory fabric so my dress wouldn't be completely ruined by grass stains. I could see orange blossoms, freesia's and so many flowers hung from everything available to be hung from and it was so beautiful. I started my slow descend wearing my dress, clutching my bouquet in my hands that had all the flowers matching in the flowers that were hung around me.

It was perfect. Too perfect.

I was waiting for the moment for it all to be ruined.

When I raised my head I saw that all eyes were on me, and my eyes searched for my Edward, and I finally found him at the end of the aisle, in front of an arch that the priest stood under, it was covered in lace and white flowers with green vines and decor. It was beautiful, gorgeous and set up on a platform with two steps.

The moment my eyes met Edward's a huge smile broke out on his face, and I couldn't help but smile as well. When I finally reached him, he took my hands to help me up the stairs and I settled in front of him, heart beating fast, a smile on my face so wide it would make people think I was insane.

The ceremony almost passed too quickly, and before I knew it Alice was juggling both her and my bouquets while handing me Edward's wedding band and Edward Sr. handed Edward mine.

As we promised in front of friends and family to love each other in sickness and in health for as long as we both shall live, the two words easily passed through my lips as if they were made to be said.

" I do."

I slipped the perfectly fitted silver band onto Edward's hand, hoping it would be there until death did part us, and even after that. He repeated the same vows, looking deeply into my eyes with all the love that I wanted; all the love I saw when I looked into them every morning when I woke, and when we showed our love to each other.

" I do."

My engagement ring had been switched onto my right finger, since our wedding rings were obviously supposed to be closer to the heart as they said, so as my diamond embedded wedding band slid onto my left ring finger, his hands holding mine so delicately, I felt him slip off my engagement ring and put it on my left ring finger next to my wedding band, a smile still on his face.

" I now pronounce you Mr. and Mrs. Edward Masen. You may kiss your bride."

We both met ourselves halfway for our kiss and my arms wrapped around his neck while his wrapped tightly around my waist. The kiss was chaste, but lingering, and he pulled away gently to kiss me again, once, twice, three times before holding me closely to him as I heard clapping, cheering and wolf-whistles coming from Emmett's direction. I looked into his deep green eyes and kissed him again, wanting this moment to last a lifetime and he rubbed my lower back, stroking my tongue with his for a moment before leaning his forehead against mine.

Then both of us turned to face our families, still standing closely together as we walked down the steps and down the aisle, Alice following behind and then Angela followed by Jess. The photographers snapped picture after picture and I couldn't wait until we could see them.

When we followed the short trail back we were in the Cullen's backyard, and I couldn't hold in my gasp as I saw it completely transformed from what it had been when we stepped out back to walk to the ceremony.

Tables were scattered and chairs, the tree's surrounding the perimeter of the house many feet away in the same twinkle lights and hanging flowers. The tables had their centerpieces Edward and I handpicked, special napkins Alice and I had worked on putting together as well as seating arrangements. There was a bigger round table, which was for Edward and I, as well as the Maid of Honor, Best Man and the bridesmaid's and groomsmen- though they were seated a little further away from us at the table so we had space to move about easily and have room to move. There was as well a platform built with a square shaped arch and a microphone I knew were for the speeches from the family and what not.

We didn't get a band specifically, but there was still music and speakers set up to play music and the Cullen's yesterday had gotten clear panels covering over the pool as a dance floor, as well as the patio around it cleared off for dancing; it was perfect and I couldn't believe it was pulled together while the ceremony was going on and we hadn't heard one noise.

" Oh my god. This is fucking amazing."

Edward turned me towards him, his eyes raking over my body slowly.

" Do you realize how heartbreakingly beautiful you look tonight?" he whispered in my ear, placing small kisses down my neck. My arms wrapped around him and he placed his lips on mine, kissing me slowly and deeply.

" I love you, more than anything. You are all I've ever dreamed of Isabella Masen." He said.

I smiled at my new name, everything inside of me glowing and full of happiness that I've never felt before at such capacity.

" I love you as well. You're everything to me, and all that _I _have ever dreamed of."

I kissed him this time, my fingers digging deeply into his hair; lost in bronze, silky locks.

" This tux of yours is driving me insane." I said, looking over his tuxedo and fixing his crooked bow-tie from my own doing. It was perfectly fitted to his beautiful body. So fit. I couldn't wait to get it off of him.

" Your father is here." Edward informed me, still holding me closely.

" Which one?" I asked, shaking my head at my use of words.

" Both, and Sue, Leah, the boys. Blake also brought his wife."

I nodded and suddenly from behind I felt arms wrapping around me tightly. I turned to see Esme and returned her enthusiastic hug.

" Welcome to the family, officially."

" Thank you, Esme." I said.

Edward's father appeared and gave his son a hug before bringing me in for one as well.

" Congratulations to both of you. You look beautiful, Bella." Edward Sr. smiled, as Edward pulled me back into his arms and kissed my temple.

Afterwards I was introduced to many people from Edward's family. I was introduced to both of Esme's sisters and Edward's cousins which were in their late twenties, and when I met his father's side I was introduced to his brother, who looked very different from Edward and his dad. He had sandy blonde hair, but that same lanky tall figure of the Masen men. He introduced himself as Nicholas and his wife Kathryn as well as their two daughters Rachel and Rebecca, who were twins and two years younger than Edward and I. He was Edward Sr. younger brother.

Esme's mother had passed away many years ago from breast cancer, but I was introduced to her father, Frank Platt, who was incredibly kind. Edward hugged him tightly and expressed how much he missed him. He lived in Arizona on his own, but he had a strong will.

" Well, you are simply a beauty, I can see why my grandson is so enraptured with you."

I smiled, " Thank you, it's so nice to meet you." I said sincerely.

We talked for a few more minutes until I was whisked away to meet more family friends, and it was then that I was introduced to the infamous ' Crazy Mary'. Her parents Victor and Janelle were incredibly nice, but Mary seemed very taken with Edward as everybody has told me before.

Her wide hazel eyes gazed at him, and I looked at her attire, seeing her wearing a very tight light pink dress with a pair of silver heels. Her hair was black, and to her shoulders straight, something about her seemed very off; and it was in a creepy way, not in a threatening way.

" This is our daughter, Mary." Janelle said, her blue eyes sparkling as she introduced her daughter.

Mary shook out of her state of whatever-the-fuck that was and shook my hand.

" It's nice to meet you. And it's so great to see you again Edward." she said, her voice lingering on his name.

" Esme and I haven't been able to catch up in such a long time, how did you both meet I want to know!"

" Well, it was when I moved here. Bella was at Forks High, I was going there and we just got together. We've been attending college in New York, we have our own apartment there but we wanted the wedding down here with the family."

She smiled, " Of course, of course. Well, I'm going to find your mother. Congratulations, Edward. We're so happy for you."

Victor and Janelle wandered off while Mary stuck around; her eyes always watching Edward or wandering up and down his body. I grabbed his hand and pulled him away to go elsewhere.

I saw my father and Sue standing together. Sue was wearing a pretty light blue sun dress while Charlie had on a pair of slacks and a while button up tucked into them; more dressed up than I had ever seen him in my life time.

My mother was talking to Blake and his wife, Phil at her side and it was very odd to witness. I walked towards my father and saw Jake and Seth running around. I couldn't believe how tall they'd both gotten, and while Jake just said a short 'Congrats', I got a hug from Seth saying that he missed me and giving Edward a handshake. We talked about school and how it was going for him until we reached Charlie and Sue- I still couldn't believe they were here.

" I didn't think you would come." I stated, clutching Edward's hand tightly.

" I've treated you very unfairly, Bella. This was the least I could do; be here for an important day."

He glanced up at Edward, almost looking ashamed, " I apologize for never giving you a chance, or bothering to get to know you. The way I've acted towards my daughter in front of you alone is enough embarrassment, Edward." he said apologetically.

Edward looked down at me, his previously hard eyes softening and he held his hand out towards Charlie, and I felt a shift in the air. Charlie grasped his hand firmly and shook it.

" I don't forgive you for how you've harmed her, but I'm not one to blatantly ignore someone when they apologize for their wrong-doings." Edward stated, wrapping his arm around me and rubbing his hand up and down my waist soothingly.

" Um, Edward. I don't think you've ever met Sue. Edward this is...Charlie's wife, and Sue this is my husband, Edward."

She shook his hand shyly and Edward gave her a straight smile before releasing her hand.

Out of the corner of my eye my mother was waving her hand for Edward and I to go over to her, Phil and where my actual father was with his wife...My step-mother. I said a quiet goodbye to Charlie, thanking him for being here and went over to her.

As I walked across the grass I felt as if a door had closed between us, like everything that had to be said was and that was that. I knew I probably wouldn't see much of my father from this day on, and I knew that maybe that's how it was meant to be. It was too complicated to work out and we'd always from now on have an awkward relationship no matter what.

I took a deep breath and Edward kissed the top of my head as we kept walking steadily across the lawn.

When I reached them I stood across from Blake, somewhat next to him and felt a little weird but not completely uncomfortable. My mother looked between us and I saw her eyes gloss over as her head moved back and forth before settling finally on me.

" Goodness, do you both look so much alike." she sighed, hanging on to Phil.

" Awkward, mom." I muttered as Edward chuckled. It seemed to get a laugh out of everybody else as well and the weirdness seemed to break afterwards.

Blake turned to me with a smile and took my hand, " Congratulations, Isabella and Edward. The ceremony was absolutely beautiful."

" Thank you. It's all thanks to Alice and Esme, Edward's step-sister and Edward's mom. They did an incredible job."

His wife Gianna turned towards me with a warm smile, " I absolutely love your dress, you look very beautiful, and I agree with my husband, the ceremony was beautiful; and this reception is absolutely outstanding."

I smiled back at her, " Thank you. If it was up to me I'd be wearing a pair of jeans and converse." I said with a laugh.

Edward tickled my side, " You can dress up for one day for me, hm?" he said, tipping my head up to give me a light kiss.

" They are just so sweet together." I heard my mother try to say secretly, and I smiled against Edward's lips before pulling away slowly.

" I don't think we've been...properly introduced. I'm Blake Moretti. This is my wife Gianna." I heard Blake say to Edward, reaching his hand out.

He shook his hand and smiled, " And as you know I'm Edward Masen."

Edward shook hands with Gianna and my mom wrapped her arm around my shoulder, holding me closely to her side and kissing my cheek.

" You look so beautiful, sweetheart, I can't believe my little girl is married. Promise me you'll still come down for summers, hm?"

I laughed, " Mom, nothing has changed besides the fact that I'm married now. I'll still see you, even when I graduate and move to...wherever."

" Wherever? You mean you might not go back to Washington."

My eyes met Edward's, " We we're thinking maybe Chicago."

" Chicago, why-"

" Why don't we take our seats." Phil interrupted, " I'm sure Edward and Bella's first dance is going to be starting any moment."

Just then I heard Alice's light voice from the microphone on the stage.

" If everybody could gather around, the bride and groom are going to be sharing their first dance as husband and wife."

Edward grabbed my hand and started to lead me over towards the dance floor, and it was incredible that we were standing over the Cullen's large in ground pool with the clear panels drilled in. When he took me into his arms the world melted away. We swayed together, and Edward tried to pull some fancy moves on me that made everybody around us chuckle over the music before pulling me back to him and swaying his hips back and forth with mine.

" You are ridiculous." I giggled, resting my head on his chest.

I felt his slender fingers slide through my long locks, my veil had been taken off, as Alice had put it somewhere safe so it wouldn't be ruined.

" I love you, my beautiful Angel." he whispered in my ear before pulling back and kissing me.

Cameras flashed one after another as we kissed intimately, but still appropriate for the people around us. I smiled and pulled away, wrapping my arms around his neck and just holding him. I felt so complete, everything was so right and something had changed in the best way possible. This was the best feeling I'd ever experienced in my life, I wanted to feel this forever.

I knew that I would with Edward.

~\\~

The night passed absolutely amazingly, and everything went off without a hitch. Everybody danced and talked and mingled around and it was beautiful; I wouldn't have changed anything. I talked to Leah and she told me all about how she was at UW, still thinking about her major and I was extremely happy to hear she was doing well and that we were able to catch up.

The food was amazing and we were getting so many compliments on how good everything tasted, as well as the expensive wine and champagne we had served. We also had soft drinks as well for those underage.

I actually got Edward out on the dance floor to a beat more quick and fast pace, and although we weren't in the club he enjoyed teasingly grinding up against me. I shared a dance with the Jess and Angela in a circle, and then with my mom, followed by James and an eager Emmett. It was quite fun, I even got a dance in with Carlisle, who expertly glided me across the floor impressing everybody.

Everybody laughed, smiled and had fun; it was the fucking wedding I would have dreamt of if I was one of those girls as I always said.

When it was time to take off my garter, instead of slithering his fingers underneath my dress, Edward gently lifted it and his head disappeared and I felt his teeth graze my thigh before he dragged it down over my leg, shoe and then whipped his head backwards.

Emmett caught my garter out of the flock of boys and fist pumped while Rosalie glared, annoyed. Edward stood and grabbed my hands, lifting me up with him and giving me a lingering kiss, a smile on his lips.

" That was fun."

I gave his ass a light smack and it was soon that everybody was gathered at the table to hear the ending speeches, although I didn't want the night to end. It was already nearing eleven, and I wondered where in the hell we were going for our honeymoon, it was very late; I was clueless.

James, Emmett, Angela and Jess both made short speeches as the groomsmen and bridesmaid, and then Alice hopped up on the stage and lowered the microphone just a tad from Emmett just being up there; trying to crack sexual jokes about hoping I slept well because we wouldn't be sleeping for a couple days.

Awkward.

When Edward Sr. stepped up he looked calm and collected.

" I don't want to drag this out long, or make anything awkward by making sexual innuendos." he paused as everybody chuckled lightly, " But I would like to welcome Bella to our small Masen family. The moment I met Bella, I knew she was right for my son; and I knew that she was exactly what he needed in order to stay out of trouble here in Forks." he kidded, " But I love both of you, and I wish you happiness in your life together. I'm incredibly happy for both of you, and I couldn't picture a woman more suitable for my son than you, Bella. You are so kind-hearted and sweet, even if you try to put up a front anybody could see how warm you are. I couldn't be more proud to call you my daughter-in-law. To the bride and groom."

I was sure that both Edward and I were in tears as we stood, raising our glasses before setting them down. I lifted my dress and stepped around the table, wrapping my arms around Edward's dad, and I could feel Edward beside me with his arm around his dad.

" Thank you for that, so much." I whispered as I felt him tighten his hold before releasing me and giving his son a full on hug, patting his back.

" I love you, kid."

" Love you, too, dad."

Next was Alice who stood up on the stage to end the speeches, and she bounced up their excitedly with a big smile on her face.

" First I'd like to say that thanks to Bella, my dear step-brother is no longer a grouchy old man." Alice said with a giggle, " But in all seriousness, I'm so happy to have a sister in this family, and as my sister; you have to get over your aversion to shopping and fashion. I'm so happy that you both found each other. Not to bring anybody down, but after you had your accident I really felt like we became so much closer, Bella, and I thought of you as a sister even before today. I love you like family, and I love you, too, Edward. I'm just so happy for both of you because you both deserve it more than anybody else." Alice was crying up on stage and she gave a smile before stepping down and running over to give us a hug. I thanked Alice for everything and smiled all teary eyed.

" I love you, too, Alice." I said, hugging her tightly.

As I hugged Alice I realized that Edward had stood up on the stage and was holding the microphone with a smile on his face.

" It's an extraordinary thing when you meet someone who you can bear your soul to, who will accept you for you who you are. I feel like I've waited for what seems like a very long time to get beyond where I am, with Bella. I feel like I can finally begin, so I'd like to propose a toast to my beautiful bride. No measure of time with you will be long enough, but we can start with forever."

He held up his glass and took a small sip as everybody clapped around us and I heard many resounding 'aww's' going around before he was coming back to me and sitting at the table, I leaned in to give him a kiss, tangling my fingers in his hair.

" I love you."

" I love you, too." he whispered passionately, connecting our lips once more.

Soon after people started to leave, giving their last congratulations and hugging us goodbye. It had been amazing to meet his family and to be a part of it now. When arms wrapped around me, I felt loved even though I'd only just met these people.

Closer family stayed longer, and soon Alice was whisking me upstairs out of my wedding dress and carefully setting it back in its bag. I changed into a cream colored dress with a v-neckline with two inch straps that fell above my knees in a straight, structured form; though it was comfortable. There was a thin black belt around my waist and I changed into a pair of simple black closed toe heels.

I thanked Alice profusely for everything as I helped her put my dress in its bag. She hugged me tightly.

" The pleasure is all mine. Now go on your honeymoon, and have fun; okay?"

I pulled back and smiled before walking downstairs, seeing Edward waiting for me at the front door. He wasn't wearing his bow-tie or jacket, and a few buttons of his shirt were undone, the sleeves were rolled up as well. He held his hand out for me, and I grabbed it when I reached the door, letting him pull me into a tight embrace as we kissed in front of the front door, everybody gathered at the stairs winding down to the driveway, the car was already started up for our departure.

My mother stood outside near the front and I held her in a tight hug.

" Still a surprise, huh?"

I nodded, " Yeah, he won't tell me."

She smiled tearfully, " Okay, well, enjoy your flight, sweetheart, okay? And maybe call me in a week and tell me where you are?"

" Of course, mom. I love you. And thank you for being here, Phil."

I gave him a weird half-hug, and as Edward and I walked hand in hand down the stairs I saw Blake and Charlie. Blake gave me a hug, and it shocked me but I returned it and he wished me a nice time. All that Charlie did was give me a nod and a short smile. I gave Leah a hug, and at the end saw Emmett shutting the trunk of the car.

" Everything is packed."

" I don't think we even-"

" I took care of everything." Alice said with a smile, " Don't worry."

Everybody cheered as we got into the car, Edward opening up the door for me before jogging to the other side. I looked at the clock and saw that it was now nearing midnight.

" We have a two and a half hour drive to Seattle's airport."

" Why not PA Airport?"

" It wasn't suitable for our...little trip. Our flight it as two thirty five."

" When do we arrive at our destination?" I asked, smiling as I looked at him.

" Tomorrow at around seven, maybe eight."

My eyes bugged out and he smiled before leaning over to kiss me deeply. He put his car into drive and turned around the driveway, heading away from the Cullen house and all of the beautiful lights and everything else. Edward's hand laid over mine, a permanent smile on his face. I'd never seen him so incredibly happy; the only other time was when I accepted his proposal.

" That smile." I sighed, leaning my head against the headrest and looking at him.

He glanced at me, " What?"

" You look so amazingly happy."

" I'm always happy with you, Bella. But knowing that I am now bound to you in every way possible...It makes me the happiest man alive."

I squeezed his hand in mine, " Good."

The rest of the drive was quiet, but Edward played music in the car, quiet, gentle music that was soothing. When we got to the airport we got everything checked in and I looked through the carry-on back Alice put together for both Edward and I. Laptop, iPhone's, iPod's, crosswords puzzles, a travel scrabble and other fun items. There were snacks, an empty notebook and pens for playing games like hangman, connect the dots and see who makes a square first. It was cute that she did this for us.

" How long is this flight?"

" We'll see, baby." he said with a smile as we waited in the seats.

When our flight was called it said it was a nine hour and forty minute, approximate, flight to Rio. I was basically in shock as Edward was leading me out, our bags were set on the plane and we had our carry-on all looked through and everything. Edward handed the lady our tickets and we went to board the flight.

" Rio?" I asked.

He smiled, " Yes, Angel."

We were on first class seats for Virgin America airlines. The seats reclined and we sat in the front seats on the right, a television in front of our seats. It was amazing. Between us were two cup holders and then two small adjustable little lights. We got comfortable and Edward was holding the blanket we also had with us, a thick blanket to curl up with. He looked funny carting it around, but it was better than a purse I guessed.

When I sat in the cushioned seat, I sighed. They were very comfortable, and I was seated next to the window. Edward sat in the chair next to me and I set the carryon bag on the ground, reclining my seat back almost immediately.

I'd been up for more than fourteen hours and I was exhausted. I lifted Edward's hand and kissed his wedding band.

" Are you comfortable Mrs. Masen?"

" Yes." I sighed happily.

He grabbed the blanket and draped it around me. Just then the flight attendant came by with a cheerful smile.

" Would you like anything to drink, maybe some pillows or something to eat?"

Her eyes lingered on Edward for a little bit too long, and I glared.

" Maybe two bottles of chilled water. My wife had a bit too much champagne tonight, she needs to sober up."

Immediately the attendant had a bitter look on her face.

" Well, sweetheart; how could I not indulge. It was our wedding day." I said, leaning forward to kiss him firmly.

She stepped away with a smile and said she'd be right on it. Edward chuckled.

" Lay it on there a little thick, hm?"

" She was ogling you."

" I'm yours, you don't have to be jealous of something you already have.

I rested my head back against the incredibly soft headrest and closed my eyes, and before I knew it I was drifting off.

**Authors Note- How was it? Let me know before I go insane! Bella's dress is in my profile for you curious people.**

**Guaranteed update before Christmas, maybe on Christmas Eve, but to those who celebrate otherwise, Happy Holidays to you and I hope everybody stays safe. **

**On a side note I also send my prayers out to those involved in the CT elementary school shooting. I was incredibly disheartened to hear about this and all of those innocent people who's lives were taken, especially during this time of the year.**

**Take the time to review, and I am going to make an EFFORT to send out TEASERS! Leave me your thoughts.**


	55. Tremble For My Beloved

**Authors Note- Hello everyone! And Merry Christmas to those who celebrate! I promised to update today so I sat down ( After hours and hours of wrapping and family Christmas Even time) to edit this before bed so I would post it today and not worry about it, but anyways. I hope you enjoy this fluffy chapter of their honeymoon and I'll see you guys in the note below!**

**Disclaimer- S. Meyer owns all things Twilight.**

**Chapter Song- Tremble For My Beloved by: Collective Soul ( Going old school 1****st**** Twilight Soundtrack)**

~\\~

EPOV

~\\~

I gazed over at Bella, seeing her peaceful face as she slept in the reclined seat comfortably. I wished I could wrap my arms around her and hold her as she slept, but I knew there would be plenty of time for that later.

The entire day had gone off without a fucking hitch and I felt the happiest I'd ever been in my life. Surrounded by family and friends everything had been perfect from cutting the cake, to our first kiss as husband and wife and the toasts we'd made. I couldn't have been happier, and Bella glowing beside me added to it.

I wasn't entirely exhausted, so I entertained myself with games on my iPhone and Bella's since we both had varying ones. A movie played in front of me, and out of the five available from a romance, to comedy to action, rom-com and a kids movie, I chose a comedy and it was Juno. I put it on quietly so it wouldn't disturb Bella or anybody else around me, although most seats seemed to be empty besides five other people. My hand reached out to hold Bella's, and her engagement and wedding ring sparkled even in the dull light.

Two hours later I felt myself drifting off to sleep, and no dream could ever top the reality I was living in.

~\\~

BPOV

~\\~

I had gotten a solid six hours of sleep on the plane, and I didn't feel a kink anywhere in my body surprisingly. In front of me there were movie selections on the TV, and next to me Edward was peacefully asleep, reclined back and turned on his side towards me. I took the blanket off of myself and draped it carefully over my husband. When I looked outside it almost looked slightly dreary. I pulled down the little curtain so it would darken the space around us and laid back, resting my eyes for a few moments.

I watched one of the movies, which was The Proposal. I leaned back and enjoyed the movie while also crossing out words in the crossword puzzle book Alice put in there. As the captain announced we would be landing in around an hour Edward had woken up, stretching his arms out before looking over at me with his sleepy eyes.

" Hey."

" Hi, sleep good?"

" Yeah...You?"

I smiled, " Yes."

He leaned over and placed a kiss on my lips before snuggling back into the blanket with a sigh.

We arrived in Rio de Janeiro at precisely seven fifty at night their time, skipping ahead a whole six hours, and I knew our sleep schedule was going to be off for a few days. When Edward and I got off of the plane we went inside the airport to gather out baggage. There was a black, sleek car waiting for us and a driver. Edward rattled off something in fucking Portuguese, which I didn't even know he could speak, and we got into the car; loading our bags in before sliding in the back.

With the windows down I looked out on the streets, exotic people dancing and the entire city was so alive. Edward was pressed closely next to me, his lips against my ear, placing tiny kisses there and down my neck as I laughed quietly because it tickled slightly. When we were out of the city everything got darker, and before I knew it we were at the docs somewhere and the car stopped.

Edward opened my door for me and led me out of the car, and the man driving took our luggage out before saying something in his language and leaving. Edward grabbed out bags, letting me carry the carry on and one other bag while we walked down a long wooden doc, everything around us completely dark. At the end we came to a speedboat, very luxurious looking and Edward hopped in easily and set our bags down.

" Edward, what is all this?" I asked as he took the bags from my hands.

" We have about a half hour until we arrive. Come." he said.

I stepped closer and he lifted me up by my waist before setting me down on the boat. He untied the ropes holding it in place at the doc and took a key out from the carry-on bag and started it up. He settled in the front seat and started driving off, the water splashing against the fast speed boat. I sat at the bench at the end, my hair whipping back and I felt almost like I was flying. Edward seemed to know the direction he was going on, so I didn't worry about how dark it was. The moon shone brightly down on us, and Edward gestured me closer and I sat in the seat next to him, leaning my head against his shoulder.

" See the light far out over there?" Edward asked, pointing forward.

My eyes squinted and I could see a small light, and it was coming closer and closer as Edward sped up at a quicker pace.

" Yeah."

" That's Isle Esme. Carlisle bought it for Esme on their first anniversary and they said that we could use it for our honeymoon." he told me.

An entire Island. Carlisle bought an entire island for Esme, and it would be completely and totally ours for our honeymoon. I honestly couldn't believe we had an Island to ourselves for about two weeks, or more if we wanted. Fuck, this wasn't even real right now. I scratched my arm and looked over at him, but all he did was smile widely.

When we reached the doc I could see everything at a closer angle, and it was absolutely breath-taking, just a one story beach house with big windows and I could see the French doors leading into the house and all the lights were on, expecting our arrival. The beach surrounded it, and in the back I could see so many trees and hear a waterfall in the distance streaming down. This all felt like a dream.

In that case I never wanted to wake up.

Edward tied the boat to the doc and climbed out. I handed him all of the bags and then he lifted me out of the boat, holding me securely in his arms as we looked at the scene in front of us. To the right I saw stairs leading out of a room on a wooden porch with two seats and a long ottoman in the middle. Double doors were closed, with sheer white curtains hiding the room slightly; though all lights were on.

" There's two housekeepers here. They stocked everything up with food for us and cleaned all the linens and everything."

When we got to the front door I opened it up for Edward since he carried all the bags, he told me to wait there at the door and set the bags down inside before coming back near me; taking me fully by surprise and lifting me off of my feet and carrying me bridal style inside the house; I squealed and he smiled.

" What is that for?"

" I'm anything if not traditional." he said, walking me across the room. Everything was very romantic and warm looking. Cream carpet and light walls with dark accent walls. Comfortable looking couches and lighting that hung from the ceiling. Most of the walls were glass, but in the living room it had nice curtains for closing it off. The kitchen was a nice size and really well up to date with all stainless steel appliances, granite countertops and a nice table off to the side of the kitchen.

When we got into the bedroom, Edward set the bags down on the soft bench at the end of the bed and then on the right side before looking over at me on the left side, a smile on his face.

The room was a good size, and the bed was big, with a large canopy with while gauzy fabric hanging around and tied to each post. The comforter, sheets and pillow shams were all a light golden color and looked so soft; I wanted to sink into them. There was a bathroom behind where Edward stood and a double door closets to my left.

Edward opened up the French doors in the room, and even though it was warm outside, there was a light soothing breeze that made me feel warmer; and it was soothing against my skin.

" Do you want to clean up from the plane?"

I nodded and he grabbed his bag. " Towels and everything is in the bathroom, and I made sure that your usual shampoo and everything would be stocked in there. Here are other things for the bathrooms in this bag Alice put together."

I grabbed my razors and the big makeup bag she had in there as well as my tampons, deodorant and usual body mist. Just the usual things I used in the shower as well as other personal products and what not.

" I'll use the one just off the living room, okay?" he said, giving me a light kiss.

" Okay. Love you."

" You, too, babe." he said before leaving the room.

The bathroom was absolutely huge in here, with double sinks; the fucking fancy kind that looked like a bowl on top of the counter kind of sinks. There was a long bathtub and a glass shower in the corner of the room. I was able to set my things on the countertops and underneath in the cabinets without it taking up much room. I grabbed a towel from underneath the cabinets and set it on the counter as I started up the shower. I just washed my body and hair, not needing to shave due to all the waxing that occurred only days ago. When I was finished I wrapped the towel around me and combed my hair out with my usual tooth comb and cleaned my face with face wash and then put on a little chapstick after brushing my teeth. I blow dried my hair just a little so it wasn't dripping, but just slightly damp in few places, and put my usual de-frizz spray in it so it would dry into its usual nice curls.

I moisturized my legs so they would be extra soft, feeling all paranoid about all of these wedding night jitters and thinking everything had to be perfect with us. I brushed my teeth again and brushed through my hair for the millionth time.

What the hell, I'd already slept with Edward before; I had no idea why I was so nervous. When I went back into the bedroom I grabbed the bag that was supposedly my clothing, and noticed Edward wasn't back in the room yet. As I opened the bag all I saw was lace.

" Alice!" I said in a hushed, angry voice.

I picked up a complete sheer thong as well as a sheer nighty. As I dug deeper I found tank tops and underwear sets, and silky nighties, then ones that were sexy and made out of thin cotton and thin straps with low necklines. I found a few bikinis and shorts that were very fucking short, I should have called them underwear instead, and strapless fitted tops and other fitted tank tops. There were sexy push-up bras and I couldn't believe that she'd done that; knowing it was her brother who was going to see it.

I was about to grab one of the underwearand tank top sleep sets since it was the only bedroom attire that covered me comfortably when Edward entered the room with a towel around his waist, his abs wet and hair damp. It sounded like a bad romance movie but it was sexy as hell.

" Good shower?" he asked?"

" Y-Yeah." I stammered out.

Bella fucking Swan...Masen, speechless. Never thought I'd see the day.

" Good. Now come here." he said, stepping around towards me and motioning for me to stand.

I was pressed against his chest tightly as his lips met mine in a sweet, soft kiss. I knew my towel was barely hanging on, where I'd tucked it in slowly coming undone. I felt all my previous nerves melt away; knowing that this was my Edward; the same person who made love to me my first time, the same person who's loved me for years despite my flaws.

" You've made me wait two weeks to make love to you." he said against my neck, licking and kissing the skin there.

" I thought it was a good idea." I sighed, feeling his hands run my back and down to my ass.

" I'm starting to think so."

When our lips met once again his hands went to frame my face and I felt my towel slowly slipping off of my body. I lifted my knee onto the fabricated bench and made my way towards the bed. There was only a soft light in the corner of the room on, illuminating the room perfectly. Edward seemed to understand where I was going with the direction of the bed and followed me; soon we were lying on the bed in a tight, intimate embrace with our towels gone. The room was warm, but a slight lukewarm breeze caused goose bumps to arise over my skin and Edward grabbed the corner of the comforter and bed sheet, flipping it over hastily. I felt him roll us over so that I was on the mattress, lying on the sheet and he leaned over me, covering us with the blanket so we weren't cold. His hasty move to shift it caused the pillows to be placed flat on the mattress, my head sinking into one as I felt his lips press into my neck, placing a deep, sucking kiss there that I knew would make an obvious mark.

Our bodies moved with familiarity, but at the same time I'd never felt Edward so gentle with me as he was being now. The pillows to my right were pushed against my side and I lifted up to adjust the blankets since Edward had put them over us so messily, and he pushed me back into the mattress, a small laugh escaping both of us before I silenced us with a kiss.

The night was spent in this embrace, and our bodies moved together perfectly as they always had. I felt something so incredibly different with Edward, the way we now moved together; the tenderness when our lips touched and tongues mingled. His hands buried in my hair as I grabbed at his back, massaging and pulling him closer all at once. I ran my fingers up and down his spine in just the right way and he would moan with my lips on his neck as we connected. It felt like there were fucking fireworks lighting up all around us and inside of my body.

It was hours later we found ourselves leaning against the pillows pressed against the headboard, my legs tangled in his as I almost sat in his lap, my lips on his as he grabbed the back of my neck with his left hand with his right around my waist. My top half exposed. Our lips moved tiredly against each other, languid and soft.

He laid me down as we lay horizontal across the bed together. His fingers ran through my hair as our faces lay close together, lips touching every few seconds.

I sighed his name and my eyes closed sleepily.

My love for him whispered in the air and I felt his lips on my forehead before I was whisked off into blissful sleep.

~\\~

It was around eleven when I'd awoken up in bed in the morning, a warm breeze floating through the room and warming my bare skin. The curtains were only slightly drawn on each side. I laid in the same position I'd fallen asleep in, and Edward was asleep with his head on my chest and arm wrapped around my waist.

I shifted my shoulders and turned my head, sighing at the comfortable bed I lay on and the beautiful man laying on me peacefully. When I stretched my legs he started to rouse from his sleep. His eyes met mine and he smiled, shifting his head to kiss over my heart.

" Good morning, beautiful."

" Morning." I said sleepily as he moved up until our heads were at level, dragging the sheet up with him to cover my exposed body. He kissed my lips once before I turned and snuggled my head into his neck, turning to press against him.

" Last night..." he sighed, drifting off at the end.

I smiled and kissed his shoulder, my left hand resting on his warm chest.

" Everything just felt so-"

" Different." I said.

" Yeah. Did you feel it, too?"

" I definitely felt it." I teased as I felt his fingers find purchase in my hair.

He kissed the top of my head, " Last night was the best night of my life."

" Of your life?"

" Yes."

I looked up at him and rested my hand on his jaw, leaning forward to kiss him softly. I could feel it slowly escalating to something more as he pulled me on top of him and pushed the blankets low, moving his hands over my back and lower.

We enjoyed our afternoon delight in quiet peace, the only noises of our breathing and quiet moans.

~\\~

Eventually we crawled out of bed and Edward made us breakfast although it was one in the afternoon. I put on a pair of underwear boy shorts and a matching tank top with my hair up in a ponytail, clearly revealing all the marks on my neck from Edward last night.

A nice breeze blew through the house and I found Edward plating two omelets'. There was fruit cut up in a bowl already on the table, as well as plates and cutlery.

He put the pan in the sink and I wrapped my arms around his waist, kissing his lips softly.

" Thank you for breakfast."

" Of course. This is like the only thing I can cook without making a complete mess of the kitchen."

We sat down across from each other and enjoyed breakfast together. Edward said not to worry about dishes; the maid would take care of everything. He wanted to show me around the beach so we went into the bedroom to change. As I looked through the three bathing suits Alice packed for me; I groaned.

Honestly, I had might as well go buck fucking naked.

I grabbed the white one, which was also a two size push up bathing suit.

As if I needed more. I wasn't huge in the chest area; I wasn't small; but enough.

But it was the only top that had the most coverage besides the small triangles that sat before me. I put on the white top and it completely pushed everything up and together. I slipped into the matching bottoms and then put on a pair of shorts before going outside to join Edward on the balcony, only in swim trunks.

When he turned and saw me his eyes bugged out of his head.

" Alice?"

" Who else?"

He pulled me against his chest and looked down at the view, " Sexy."

" Eyes up here." I teased, walking away from him and heading down the stairs, my feet sinking into the warm sand. We wandered around the island, through the small trails and he showed told that we could go zip-lining if we wanted later, as well as scuba-diving. I was excited to enjoy this stress-free time with him.

It was so beautiful here, the bright colors and the pure raw nature of it all. I loved it. We could go hiking towards the back of the island Edward claimed, it was a good hour or more hike to the top, which wasn't bad and there was a trail.

" Want to go in the water?" he asked as we walked along the ocean's edge, our feet wet with sand stuck to them.

I smiled and shimmied out of my shorts before walking in a few feet and diving in, my hair saturated. The water was so clear and blue I could see the ocean floor. I heard a splash and knew Edward was close to me, when I stood, I couldn't find him. My eyes looked around before suddenly I was enveloped in his arms from behind; a quiet squeal escaping me in surprise.

His lips touched my neck and I sighed, enjoying this feeling.

The water came up to just below my bust, and up to Edward's waist. I turned around, looking up at him with my hands on his shoulders; trying to lift myself up. He chuckled and grabbed onto my hips, helping me and I wrapped my legs around his waist, my arms around his neck. Edward floated backwards, holding me closely against him as if I'd ever let go.

I tipped my head back to the sun, my eyes closed.

We fooled around in the water for awhile, enjoying it and getting a little bit of sun. As we made our way back inland I tripped over my ankle and tumbled into the sand, bringing Edward who was right behind me with me as I fell on my back; grains of sand sticking to every inch of my wet body

I groaned as Edward started to laugh uncontrollably.

" Fuck, how are we supposed to get through the house without making a fucking mess." I whined, trying to brush the sand off with already sandy hands.

He chuckled and I felt the water wash up underneath us; taking some of the sand but also making it worse.

Before I knew it Edward lifted me up into his arms and went running towards the house. He ran through the bedroom until we were in the bathroom, inside of the shower with the water running down on us, washing all of the sand off. It was literally everywhere, in my bottoms, my goddamn boobs; just fucking everywhere.

Edward shoved his shorts down before helping me take off my bottoms and then slowly untying the top of my bathing suit; and it suddenly was no longer about the sand as his lips caressed my neck, my jaw and cheek until he finally found my lips and kissed me with more passion that I'd ever felt. He turned us around so his back was to the wall and the water faced my back, streaming through my hair to get the sand out.

" Fucking huge shower." he said against my lips, sinking down until we were sitting and I was in his lap.

" That all you can think about?" I said against his lips, running my hands down his abs.

He moaned, " You wouldn't have the first idea."

~\\~

After our 'shower' I'd slipped into a pair of white shorts and a black strapless top. Edward had on a pair of dark cargo pants that rolled up to his calf and a loose, short sleeved button up shirt. We sat outside on the long, lifted up ottoman outside with two orangey-red fluffy pillows on top. He grabbed a box and set up a game of chess.

My hair dried in loose curls naturally from the breeze as I leaned forward and moved one of my pawns, taking one of Edward's in the process. With his black knight, he knocked mine out and grabbed it for his side.

He was winning, of course.

Our little game went on, kings and queens being protected and other pawns being knocked out of the game. I took out one of his bishops and a rook just as he finished off both of mine, and before I knew what I was doing; he was taking out my king and won the game. I shoved them off of the board and leaned over towards him.

" You chose this game because you knew you would be better at it than me." I said.

He chuckled, " Whatever you say, sweetheart."

Afterwards we headed inside for lunch and went to eat outside for awhile. The peaceful ambiance around me and this beautiful man beside me making this the best time I'd ever had.

~\\~

It had already been a week here in Isle Esme and I was already exhausted from all the activity Edward and I had done. He'd kept me distracted with everything from our countless games of chess to zip-lining through the island, swimming, scuba diving and snorkeling whatever the difference was between them. We explored the jungle that ringed around the rocky peak of our impeding hiking trip on the following day. We swam with porpoises that played in the warm, shallow waters on the other side of the island which was incredibly cool.

I felt a bit as if Edward were distracting me on purpose, because by the end of the night I was too exhausted to even consider having sex with him; I was famished by the time the sun set and ready to fall asleep after eating dinner that we would make; and he'd only sneak in a kiss or two. Our showers were strictly PG, and he hadn't had sex in a couple of days.

So I'd started to wear the sexy lingerie pieces Alice had packed for me, unashamed at the sheer lace when I'd lay in bed; exhausting but still hoping for _something_. I never wore anything this sexy in my life, but I was shameless when it came to Edward; he knew this.

Finally after a long day of hiking through the forests and jungles I collapsed in bed after a warm shower to clean off the sweat, Edward lying next to me reading a book. I sighed and snuggled into the pillows, my bare leg tossed over the long pillow I hugged to my chest.

" What're you reading?" I asked, stretching over the pillow to rest my head on his shoulder.

He moved his left hand from his book and wrapped his arm around me, holding me closely to his side and massaging my hip over the soft fabric of the purple lacy mesh baby doll I wore. It was sheer fabric from the bust down, exposing the matching panties as well as my flat stomach.

" Dexter, the book series."

" I see."

" Mhm."

" Are you alright, Edward?" I asked quietly.

He glanced at me before setting his book to the side and looking at me with gentle, comforting eyes, his hand still moving up and down my hip," I thought I could avoid having to say anything about it. I didn't want to worry you."

I sat up, suddenly feeling panicked inside, " What's going on?"

" The past few days I was having really bad chest and pains in my heart."

" Edward?! Why didn't you tell me? We need to go home; you have to see a doctor."

He shook his head and grabbed my hands, grounding me.

" Bella, it's okay. This used to happen to me a lot. I called Carlisle and talked to him; he just told me to take it easy for a few days until they went away. Therefore not doing anything that would make my heart rate go up or cause a lot of exertion. Which is why I've just been taking you out swimming and trail hiking; taking it easy and dosing up on my meds..."

" Are you sure?" I asked, resting my hand on his chest.

Edward nodded, " Yes, Bella. If I wasn't okay I would have told you. I was feeling alright today, so as long as it doesn't come back there is nothing to worry about."

" I thought you were trying to avoid having sex with me."

He laughed lightly, " You've been driving me insane wearing these types of things to bed." he told me, running his hand up my hip, dragging my top up, gathering it near my chest and running his hand over my smooth stomach.

" I'm sorry. You should have told me. First rule in marriage." I said, leaning over to kiss him softly.

His fingers ran through my hair, " You're right. I just didn't want to worry you, Angel."

" So...I get your heart racing?"

Edward rolled us over so he was on top of me, and he took my hand and put it over his heart.

" You make my heart go insane."

I grinned and he rested his body on mine, resting his head over my own heart, my arms wrapping around his middle. I smacked his ass lightly, pushing him down.

" Lay down." I told him, giggling.

With his full weight on me I sighed contently and ran my fingers through his hair, a low rumbling noise escaped him and I knew it was because he was enjoying what I was doing. I had my legs on either side of his, my knees bent up as his hips fit perfectly between my body.

It was comfortable and warm. He lifted up for a moment and slipped his shirt off, leaving him only in a pair of flannel pajamas. I wrapped the comforter around his waist and leaned my head into the fluffy pillows behind me, letting my fingers roam over his scalp and through his silky hair.

" Promise you'll tell me when you aren't feeling good."

" I promise." he whispered against my stomach.

~\\~

I awoke early in the morning, at the butt fucking crack of dawn. Edward was passed out in the same place had been before. My bladder was screaming at me and I had to go to the bathroom. Now.

" Babe." I gently roused Edward.

He sighed and turned his head to the other side, holding me around the waist tighter.

" Edward." I said, just slightly louder.

Edward sat up more and looked up at me with sleepy worry.

" What's wrong?"

" I have to take a wicked piss." I complained, moving away from his heavy body as he rolled over with a sigh.

I quickly used the bathroom, feeling relieved when I was finished and washed my hands before walking back into the bedroom and crawling up on the bed. Edward was awake, waiting for me and higher up towards the headboard, his hair sticking up crazily everywhere.

My head snuggled up on his chest and he ran his hand over the curve of my ass before lifting up the back of my nighty and tracing invisible patterns on my back.

" I love you." I said, kissing over his heart.

" I love you, too, Mrs. Edward Masen."

A smile spread over my face and he wrapped the comforter around my waist, although it was already warm and humid here on Isle Esme; the small gestures warmed my heart and I wouldn't trade them for anything, even if it felt like my legs were sweating.

" I don't ever want to leave here." I sighed, looking up at him.

" We have until September, we can stay here as long as then. Maybe for our first anniversary I can take you back here, hm?"

I nodded, " I would love that."

He smiled down at me, " You're beautiful."

" So are you." I murmured, cupping the side of his face with my hand.

Edward leaned down and pressed our lips together sweetly. I took his bottom lip between mine and sucked lightly on it, licking and biting before releasing it and doing the same to his top. When I stopped he sucked my tongue into his mouth for just a moment before kissing me deeply, our tongues mingling together as we devoured each other's mouths.

He pulled me on top of him, his hands running over my backside to my hips before anchoring me towards him. I wrapped my arms around his neck, holding him closer with our chests pressed together as close as I could make them.

" Bella," he moaned quietly.

I pulled away, breathing deeply, " What? Are you okay?"

He smiled, " Yes. You're just too much for me to handle."

" Too much?" I asked.

" Shh."

And he proceeded to quiet with me with a searing kiss as pressed his lips to mine and pressed me onto my back as my underwear slipped down my legs.

**Authors Note- I'm so sorry to the people I sent teasers to saying I was updating December 24th! It completely slipped up with that because although I type out everybody their on special response to a review, the ending is the same for everybody so I copy and paste- and I didn't catch on to see that I made a mistake there so I'm so sorry!**

**My gift to you for the Holidays is this chapter, and a teaser to go with it if you send me a Review present for this chapter. Please? Love you all, Happy Holidays**


	56. Love You Out Loud

**Authors Note- Hello everyone, and I hope your 2013 has been going great so far!**

**Disclaimer- S. Meyer owns all things Twilight.**

**Chapter Song- Love You Out Loud by: Rascal Flatts**

**Warning – Lots of Fluffy-ness below, don't get lost in it!**

~\\~

BPOV

~\\~

When I awoke in the further morning it was to the sound of my phone ringing. It had been quiet all week, and I knew I should have been expecting this; but my bubble didn't want to burst just yet. Edward rolled over and was kissing my neck, down to my chest and to my stomach; distracting me from my task.

I reached my phone that lay on the end table and answered it, bringing it to my ear.

" Hello?" I asked in a sleepy, raspy voice.

" Bella, you never called your mother to let her know where you are!" I heard my mother's loud voice shrill on the other end.

I rubbed my eyes, " Oh, mom, hi."

" It's five in the morning here, I was getting up for my early morning run so I figured I'd call you before I went is that okay?"

" No, no, it's alright."

" Where are you, honey?"

I smiled and felt Edward pressing himself against my back completely, pushing my hair over my shoulder and moving to kiss the back of my neck, his hand on my hip as he pulled his bare front to my back. I fought the urge to make any noise and focused on my task.

" An island off Rio. It's fucking beautiful mom, Carlisle bought it for Esme on their anniversary. I'll have to take pictures and send them to you to show you the house and beach. The weather has been amazing."

" That's amazing, what time is it there?"

"It's around eight." I said, looking at the clock.

" Oh, I'm sorry! I didn't wake you did I?"

" Mom, it's alright. I was sleeping but I got a good night's rest anyways. We've been snorkeling and hiking and zip-lining all week. It's amazing."

" Is Edward sleeping?"

" No, he's right next to me."

" Oh, okay. Well, I just wanted to check in with you, sweetie. I'm so glad you are having a good time. Call me when you get home?"

" Of course I will. I love you."

" Love you, too, baby. Bye."

" Bye, mom."

I hung up the phone and set it on my end table before lying back down in the sheets. Edward was still kissing and laving at my neck, and it was like a direct line to every wire in my body setting me on fire wanting more and more, but I was exhausted from our earlier activities.

" How's your mom?"

" Sounded good. Wanted to check in, know where I was. She was as curious as I was."

He smiled against the back of my neck before making me lay on my back next to him, kissing my cheek before resting his head against mine.

" I bet."

" You hungry?"

" I don't want to get up." I complained, turning into his chest immediately, wrapping my arms around him tightly.

He chuckled, " You don't have to get up."

" I don't want either of us to get up." I corrected myself.

For another hour we laid in bed before I got up and decided to make breakfast for us instead of Edward. He'd been making it for us for awhile so I felt like I should as well. Edward had fallen asleep during our anyways so I went into the kitchen and made us some chocolate chip pancakes, which are one of Edward's favorites, and cut up some fresh fruit just to keep the meal somewhat healthy. I brought it into the room and the aroma seemed to have woken him up because he sat up, rubbing his eyes tiredly. I got up onto the bed with my knees and sat down with my legs crossed with our food on my lap

" Look at this." he said, stretching his arms around and leaning forward to kiss me, flicking his tongue ring with mine. "Thank you, baby."

We ate breakfast in bed and then I put all the dishes in the sink while Edward got into the shower, and I joined him in the middle of it and cleaned up before getting dressed in a strapless top packed by Alice and a pair of white shorts.

I dried my hair and let it curl naturally as it dried; I put it up in a high ponytail and Edward couldn't seem to get his lips off of my shoulders and exposed skin. His hands ran over my smooth, and now tanned thighs.

" You're so sexy." he murmured as I attempted to draw a line of waterproof eyeliner on my eye.

" Edward, I can't focus." I said, setting the liner down and smudging a pencil liner on the bottom.

After a little mascara and another hickey added to my neck I got out of the bathroom and went to hang out in the living room in front of the expansive television. We hadn't yet to use it and an afternoon of relaxing on the couch together sounded very fucking nice after some very active days.

" What do you want on?"

" Anything good."

" I'll put a movie on, how does that sound? All the TV is probably nothing you'd understand."

I nodded and snuggled into a pillow. After slipping a movie in the player he sat in the middle of the couch and lifted my legs over his lap. He started scooting me closer until I was sitting in his lap and giggling. He kissed my cheek and started peppering kisses everywhere.

" Edward, shouldn't we be watching the movie?" I asked.

" It's our honeymoon." he replied pressing his lips to mine and gently kissing me.

Just then I heard a loud rapping on the door and Edward groaned.

" It's the cleaning people. Fuck."

Edward hopped off the couch and walked through the house to open the door. I didn't really see them until they were going into the bedroom and changing sheets, bringing new ones in and old ones out

" Isn't it kind of strange their changing seats that we've been having sex on?"

He laughed and wrapped his arms around me, " Trust me, they are probably fully aware of what has been going on in that bed."

I pressed my lips to his softly, " It's still weird...Fuck, Edward, my underwear from last night is still on the floor!" I said, jumping up.

He grabbed onto me, " Bella, calm down."

" Edward, no. That's just so fucking wrong."

Edward laughed and pulled me into his lap, kissing me senseless. He tugged my lip ring with his teeth when he pulled away. I licked his bottom lip before pulling away and ran my fingers through his hair.

" I think all the water is making your hair grow like crazy." I said, running my fingers through his mussed locks. His hair looked a lot longer since the wedding, it had been pretty short even then with still that messy look, Esme had made him get a haircut and even went as far as to have his face professionally shaved.

" It makes your hair all soft." he murmured, burying his fingers in my ridiculously long hair.

" You know, before you I wouldn't let my hair get any longer than just below my shoulders."

I wrapped one arm around his neck and put my head on his shoulder.

He smiled, " It's a fetish. When you straddle my waist and lean your head back-"

" Shh, shh." I said as the cleaners walked out, a man and a woman with a hamper and sheets, not looking much towards us.

" You're my beautiful, sexy, wife." he stated, emphasizing the last word, " but you can cut your hair if you want."

I shook my head, " No."

" You can't ever make up your mind can you?

" I like feeling your hands run through my hair, and plus, I don't think mullets are in anymore." I said, leaning closer.

" No?" He said. I could feel his breath on my lips.

" I don't think so." I whispered, wrapping both arms around his neck and pulling him down to me.

The rest of our afternoon was spent entangled in each other's arms and lazing around in the living room. We played card games and laughed through them and made a light lunch, not very hungry. We didn't wander much outside today, and when the cleaning people finally left all rooms were spotless and clean. The bed was so perfect I was sure I could bounce a fucking penny off of it.

Until Edward threw me on top of it and told me we had to start messing this place up somehow, starting with the bed. And we rolled around in the sheets and made out like we were kids again until exhaustion took both of us and we took a mid-afternoon nap in the messy bed.

Later I found all of my clothing folded in the drawers in the bedroom, not in my bags anymore; which were now under the bed, including my lingerie items and while I felt a little intruded on, she had cleaned them so I guessed organizing it was no different. Edward's clothes were all set out in the drawers as well; all in all, I guess it was more convenient than digging through a bag. We were just lazy mother fuckers.

The bathroom was spotless and clean, smelling of lemon cleaner Edward claimed as he yelled from the room taking a piss.

With the door wide open.

" We're married, isn't that okay now?" he asked, buttoning his pants after washing his hands.

" Edward, you take a piss while I'm in the shower, doing my makeup, hell, when I'm taking a bath."

With a roll of his eyes he crawled up on the bed and laid with his head on my chest, letting me run my fingers through it softly as he laid against me.

" I love you." he said out of nowhere.

" I love you, too." I murmured, kissing the top of his head.

He leaned up and buried his face in my neck, placing a gentle kiss over one of his marks he made on me.

" Do you really love it here?" he asked.

I smiled, " Being anywhere with you is enough, we could be in a motel room and I'd be just as happy. It's not about the destination."

" You're incredible. How'd I get so fucking lucky?"

" I ask myself that almost every day."

~\\~

August 29th

Sunday

~\\~

After seventeen days of pure bliss on Isle Esme it was time for Edward and I to head back home to the States. And while I would miss the quiet, the afternoon and late night swims, and no responsibilities; it was time for us to get back to reality.

We were also picking up Zoey at the airport as well, we had been able to get coordinating flights and she'd come in twenty minutes after we were supposed to land then we'd take a cab ride home. Everything was all packed and Edward kissed me as he locked up the door to the front house and pocketed it. We headed towards the boat at around one, our plane would be taking off at two forty, and we would be on a nine and a half hour plane ride as well as go behind six hours. So we would technically be in New York landing at 5PM, I was glad at the timing because at least we could keep ourselves up for a few hours and then crash.

We got checked in to the airport and boarded quickly. Most of the flight we were up and awake, but completely exhausted by the time we were nearing New York. We'd enjoyed the movies they played on the plane and took advantage of the games Alice packed for our carry-on bags as well.

When we were back to New York I was happy and sad. Happy because we were home, sad because it was pouring rain and I was used to sunshine and heat. We got our bags and Edward went to get them in the taxi and waited outside in the car while I went to grab Zoey. She was at the counter and I just had to sign a paper before taking my little ball of fluff and getting into the car. She was meowing like a mad woman, or cat. Pawing through the cage and I could tell the taxi driver was getting annoyed with her noises

The rain only got heavier when we got towards home and when we did, Edward did quick runs with all of the bags before coming with me and Zoey with an umbrella so her cage wouldn't become a wet mess.

When we got inside it was so weird to be home, but still so nice. I let Zoey out of her cage and cuddled her close, but she wanted her Edward. She climbed up his leg until he picked her up and snuggled with her, kicking his shoes and jacket off before going into the living room. I chuckled and decided to order some Chinese for dinner, delivered of course, and went into the living room.

" It's so nice to be home."

I snuggled into his side and smiled, petting Zoey's head, " I agree."

~\\~

" Holy fucking shit I can't stand to be in this house right now. Dishware, candle shit, silverware; which looks pretty fucking fancy, embroidered towels? What the hell? Glassware cups and wine glasses. A Panini maker...A Panini maker?!" Edward shouted through the mess.

After the day we'd gotten home, we were getting bombarded with all of the wedding gifts we'd received from Edward's family and it was absolutely insane how expensive all of these things were. Expensive vases, silverware and hell, we'd got an entire brand new set of pots and pans from a brand I couldn't even read.

Meaning it was the fancy shit.

Zoey chewed at the cardboard boxes and the tissue paper, playing around while Edward pulled his hair out.

" Look, all we have to do it just go room by room. Let's start with the kitchen. Fuck, an entire plate set? What do they think we eat off of here, paper plates?"

Luckily, we did have enough cabinet space for all of the plates, glass cups and wine glasses as well as a few highball glasses for beer or whatnot. We switched out our silverware with the ones that Carlisle's brother and wife had purchased for us that were really nice and finished up with all kitchen things, and then put away the embroidered towels, candles and candle holders. I found one huge package and ripped it open, not looking from who it was from and found brand new silk sheets, comforters, pillow shams and a bed skirt. I flipped the top over and saw it was from Crazy fucking Mary.

" Edward!"

" Yeah?!"

" Mary sent us something nice." I said, walking up the stairs as I saw him stacking the towels in the upstairs small closet.

I set the box on the bed and he looked inside before pulling his head away and groaning.

" Seriously?"

" We could use the comforter to sleep on, that would be nice."

" Bella..."

" The rest we can just fold up and put in the closet I guess."

" Their the same color my old ones were. Red. What a fucking weirdo!" he said, groaning.

I smiled and left him with the box upstairs as I went back down. The candles were really nice to put on our coffee table and on some of the extra shelving between books and movies. I realized we'd have to send out thank you notes to everybody. I figured I could do it all online and save trouble, then all we'd have to do is send everything out by writing addresses, and we could make stickers for our address to put in the corner. I groaned at all the work but all of these things were so lavish that I had to give my thanks to them. There were a few throw comfy blankets that I figured we could put on the couch and maybe on our bed. Since Edward was a blanket stealer and these were cozy; it would be nice. Some even sent full king sized blankets, god they were so generous.

And rich...

We spent the entire day going through everything before collapsing in bed after eating pizza for dinner.

" Why is your side of the family huge and mine so non-existent."

He laughed, " I'm sorry, baby."

I snuggled into his chest; his soft hoodie pullover he was wearing was covered in his scent and fucking cuddly.

" Feel free to burrow in." he said, wrapping his arms tight around me.

Zoey stretched out at the end of the bed and meowed before snuggling up against my back, stretching out like I knew she loved to do. I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled up to kiss him. He rolled me on top of him and Zoey whined at me, Edward pushed the little furball from the bed and started to slowly undress me, waiting until I was only in my underwear to undress him; lifting up his sweatshirt, his t-shirt before unzipping his jeans.

" Impatient, are we?" he laughed.

My lips kissed over the 'B' on his ribs, which always made him moan. Fingers ran through my hair as I kissed down his stomach to his navel, my tongue leaving a pathway as well. He lifted me up and pressed me against the mattress.

" Is tonight the night we christen our marital bed?"

" Indeed, Mr. Masen."

~\\~

When I awoke it wasn't to the pleasant noise of Edward's soft snore, or the rise and fall of his chest. No birds chirping or any shit like that, but to the sound of Zoey meowing in my ear. I groaned and buried into the blankets around me, the side of my face meeting Edward's shoulder. I felt his arm lift around me to pull me closer almost unconsciously. His chest was warm and smooth, soft skin against my own.

I brought my right arm up to wrap around his neck loosely, pressing my body up against his as I did. He held me tighter and I sighed deeply. The clock stated that it was already nine thirty in the morning; it was no wonder Zoey was going nuts. We usually fed her around this time, but she could wait a few more minutes...

" Can I just bury myself in you all day." I heard Edward say quietly.

" I was going to ask the same thing if you were awake."

" We can just pretend we're on our honeymoon."

Our naked chests pressed together and Edward kissed my neck softly while I returned the favor. He was warm and comfy and so damn soft against me; fuck I didn't want to leave either. Too fucking perfect. With his arms wrapped around me I wouldn't ever leave.

" Best idea." I mumbled against his skin.

I felt him throw his leg over mine and pull me closer. Zoey jumped onto the bare skin of my back and walked over to Edward, trying to curl up between us.

" Zooo." Edward whined, shifting underneath the comforter to make her move.

" You wanted her, you give her breakfast."

" As long as she gets off of my ass."

He whipped the blankets off and walked stark naked out of the bedroom. Edward was back within five minutes, hopping back into bed and covering up with the blankets quickly. He was obviously cold, and I could feel the goose bumps on his skin. I laughed as he wrapped his arms around me and tucked his head into my neck.

" Damn cat. I just wanted to enjoy my morning."

I laughed and ran my hands up and down his back, " Poor, baby."

I tugged at one of his cartilage piercings with my teeth playfully and he looked up at me with narrowed eyes, " What're you up to?"

" Nothing, silly boy." I said, turning over and making him face my back.

He leaned up and bit the back of my neck, making my mouth fall open slightly, my lips curling at the end. When I felt the entire length of his body up against mine, completely bare and warm I moaned quietly. He roamed his hand up my stomach and grasped flesh.

" Good morning, Isabella." he whispered in my ear.

" Well, good morning to you-Oh, fuuck."

~\\~

After pealing our naked sweaty bodies off of the bed and from each other; Edward had lifted me up and brought me into the shower, turning the water on so it was nice and warm. When I was pressed against cold tiles I pushed him back and stood in front of him.

" It's cold, stop." I complained, letting the water hit my back.

He lifted me up in his arms, kissing my lips and holding my head directly under the water, I could feel some of it pass between our lips, and when he pressed my back against the wall I gasped into his mouth. Partially from the cold wet tiles and the other because of surprise.

" Honeymoon, remember?"

~\\~

I wouldn't lie and say Edward and I did anything productive today. Boxes were still all over the main floor of the house, but we moved around them, walking around in barely any clothes just like we had on Isle Esme. I made us lunch in a pair of shorts and my bra, using the Panini maker we'd gotten, and ate with Edward, who was wearing just a pair of sweatpants.

We watched re-runs of CSI: NY and ate our sandwiches, that Edward claimed were good, until we somehow ended up tangled on the couch with clothes mangled on the floor and I lay with a breathless Edward who's head was on my chest, my fingers running through his hair.

I didn't get this much action in a day even on my honeymoon.

He was quiet, slowly catching his breath while I gazed and twisted his hair in my fingers. His body laid between mine, even though bare it was enough to warm me. He sat up slightly, taking a drink from his beer before laying back down on my chest, his chin against my breast.

" Comfortable?" I asked him.

He reached over, grabbing one of the many throws we now had for our couch thanks to his family, tossing it over his body and mine.

" Now it's perfect."

Edward had absolutely passed out on me for about an hour and a half. I couldn't complain though, my stomach was full, I could take sips of his beer and the CSI: NY marathon was enough to keep me entertained. His even breathing was soothing, and I never stopped my fingers running through his hair until they started to get tired. He was so peaceful.

I loved this man with all of my heart, every single crevice and corner without a doubt. He owned it completely.

When he woke up he still didn't want to move, but he complained about having to take a piss before getting up and wrapping the blanket around him. I went into the laundry room and grabbed a freshly folded shift of his that was still warm from the dryer, just a white short sleeved t-shirt, I slipped it on with my shorts and laid back down on the couch. When he returned he glared at my clothing, but asked me to sit up. He laid behind me the blanket between us and let me lay on his chest as I'd done for him.

" Why is the blanket between us you weirdo?" I asked, grabbing and pulling at it.

" You want to feel my junk on you? Be my guest."

" Should I fear what I now own?"

" Own, I don't fucking think so."

With a smirk I reached down and grabbed him, " I do."

" Okay." he moaned, trying to move but I rested my hand on his chest and laid down.

He grabbed my hand, " You're evil."

" You love me."

" And don't you forget it."

" This day has been so productive so far, I think we should continue with these."

He kissed my shoulders and moved his hands down my hips, " You're the sexiest woman."

I ran my fingers through my long mass of brown curly hair.

" You think so?"

Edward leaned up and pressed a soft kiss to my lips, " Mhm."

" Someone spike your drink with tequila?" I asked against his lips.

He shushed me and went to slip my shirt off, or his if we were being technical.

" I didn't tell you that you could put clothes on."

" Yes, Master." I joked, kissing his jaw.

I felt his hands on my face, gently touching the piercing in my lip before moving up to my ears and touching the studs and rings before giving a playful tug at my industrial bar.

" What do you think I'd look like without all this?"

" Just as beautiful." he said, kissing me softly.

I smiled and wrapped my arms tightly around his neck, my chest smashed against his covered with the blanket. His fingers made patterns on my skin and traced my spine, still kissing me languidly, softly.

My left hand rested on his cheek, soft and smooth and moving to his chin. I moved my lips down and grazed his chin with my teeth but he stopped me by burying his face in my neck, sucking on my skin with purpose.

He knew that his lips on my neck had a direct line to every wire in my body, and I was putty in his hands. I didn't realize he was probably making the ugliest mark on me until it was done. I shoved him off and yelled his name. He started to laugh and wrapped his arms tighter around me while I wiggled to get up.

" Edward!"

" You let me!"

" That was unfair, you know it."

I got myself out of his grasp and went to the mirror that hung on the wall adjacent to the television. Two dark blue-purple with speckled red bruises marked my neck, one just below my pulse and one below that one. They were extremely dark.

" The view of your ass from here is great."

My eyes were narrow as he laughed and finished off his beer.

" Baby, I'm sorry. I just couldn't help myself. You're mine."

" I married you, I married you! You don't need to mark me anymore."

He stood up and pulled me into his arms, " I'm sorry." he stated, kissing my forehead and nose softly.

" You're absolutely ridiculous. You know, you're buying me more concealer."

" Anything, my beautiful wife." he said, kicking a box aside and carrying me back towards the couch.

" You'd better."

" I'll make it up to you."

When he started to suck lightly on the other side I pushed him off of me and grabbed his t-shirt that he tossed off of me earlier, I put it on and grabbed the blanket that was tangled between our legs and covered up my neck.

" You're no fun."

" Fuck off." I laughed, as he tried to tickle my sides.

I lifted myself off of the couch with a sigh and yawned heavily.

" We have to clean up this mess." I told him, looking around the living room and into the kitchen, throwing his sweatpants in his direction.

He instead grabbed the blanket and wrapped it around himself, laying on the couch like the lazy ass he was and giving me a pouty look; as if he expected me to deal with all of this on my own.

No fucking way!

" I'm serious." I said, picking up one of the boxes.

" Can't we just have a day? When we got home we unpacked and then crashed, then we were bombarded with this mess yesterday, and trust me; I bet there is more to come today. I just want to lay around with you, baby."

His words almost broke me and I sighed and sat on the couch, leaning against his stomach.

" Can you just help me break everything down and I'll take it out to the recycling bin."

He groaned.

" You don't have to put your pants on."

" Where are the scissors?" he complained.

~\\~

We were able to break everything down and I took everything to the side of our house and tossed it out within two trips of the flat boxes. The house looked ten times cleaner and I sighed in relief before collapsing down on the chair across from the couch where Edward lay.

" Better?"

" Mhm. Now what are we going to do with those red silk sheets?"

Edward groaned, " Garbage."

" Or we could use the comforter to sleep on." I suggested again.

" Go for it. Happy wife, happy life."

I narrowed my eyes, " Are we that married couple already?"

He shrugged and put his eyes on the television. I got up and stood in front of him, lifting his face up and kneeling down on the couch.

" Hm?"

" I just want you to be happy, and if that makes you happy then go for it. That's all that matters to me."

I leaned down to kiss him, " They remind me of back in Chicago, sleeping on those black silk sheets with you..."

He smiled, " Okay, love, then you do what you want, but can you do it later?"

" Why?" I asked, just as he grabbed me around the waist and draped the covers around us. He had put his sweatpants on and I put my arms around him, snuggling into his warm chest and feeling myself fall into a deep sleep.

Edward and I napped on the couch for about three hours before the couch just felt uncomfortable and we were both pretty hungry. I made us an early, simple dinner and Edward went outside to grab the mail while I set the table.

I groaned when I saw the boxes he carried in. Seven more, there were seven more boxes and I hoped that was all that was left. They were all huge, and Edward left them near the door and sat down at the table and plated the food. Just a simple chicken breast with Italian breadcrumbs with a little bit of a lemony basil cream sauce and then just pasta underneath. It only took a half hour to put together and we were filled up by the end of dinner. Coke glasses empty and plates scraped clean, after putting everything in the dishwasher Edward lifted me up, making me squeal and carried me upstairs. We laid in our bed together, curled up with Zoey who had finished up her dinner.

" When school starts there won't be days like this very often."

I wrapped my arms around him, " There will be."

" Yeah, once a month. I need more you."

A smile spread over my face at his whiny tone.

" It's not like we won't be home every night in bed together. We live together, we're married. You're stuck with me."

He rolled over on top of me and wrapped his arms around my waist, worming them underneath me before placing a kiss on my lips softly. I sighed against his mouth and he pulled away.

" I sound like a fucking whiny bitch but I can't help it."

" It's okay, I love you, even the whiny bitch part."

I pinched his ass and he made a high pitched squeal/yelp before pinching and tickling my sides. I was gasping for breath, writhing beneath him on the bed trying to get away and breathless from constant laughter, begging him to stop.

" Stop! Edward! I can't breath!" I yelled out before he pulled his hands away and put his hand under my ass to give it a pinch. I yelped and dug my fingernails into his shoulder, to which he hissed quietly at.

" You like to be a little rough don't you, love?" he said, nuzzling my shoulder.

I pulled his mouth to mine for just a moment and I felt his forehead pressing into mine.

" I just want this to last forever."

He cradled the one side of my face, " It will. You and me, forever."

" And that's okay?" I asked, knowing he'd understand what I was referring to.

" Yes, it's perfect. You, me and Zoey, our surrogate child." he said, laughing at the end and reaching over to scratch the top of her head, her meowing at the sound of her name.

I wrapped my arms around him and pulled him down to me, wanting to feel his weight, his warmth; the all surrounding feeling of it was something I couldn't compare to anything. He rested head between my shoulder and neck, my arms wrapped around him; holding close.

We ended up completely passed out, at least I had first and then Edward; so I didn't feel the effects of his dead weight until three in the morning when my bladder was screaming at me. I put a pillow next to me sideways and slid from Edward's grasp, pulling the pillow in my spot and he groaned before curling into it with a small smile. I used the washroom quickly and washed my hands before getting back into bed. Zoey curled up next to me and I stroked her fur to fall asleep, watching Edward's beautiful face as he slept.

As he assured me before, I believed that we would be okay. I hoped that our life together just the two of us would be enough for him. I was sure that our love would never burn out though.

**Authors Note- I hope you all enjoyed this chapter, although it was delayed. I got very sick and had to take a couple days to get better, but I hope you loved this chapter. REVIEWS get TEASERS so what are you waiting for?!**


	57. Chances

**Authors Note- I could give lots of explanations as to why this is so late, but I have just been so busy! I've barely been near my laptop unless for class work but I hope you guys understand that I'm trying!**

**Disclaimer- S. Meyer owns everything Twilight.**

**Chapter Song- Chances by: Five For Fighting**

~\\~

BPOV

September 13th,

Monday

~\\~

" Please don't force yourself, I don't want you getting sick in the middle of the restaurant. I'm going to go get you some ginger ale okay, just sit back, and take deep breaths." Edward instructed.

I leaned back against the cabinets in the bathroom as he ran downstairs to grab ginger ale. I wiped my mouth and threw it into the toilet before flushing it and taking a deep breath.

The past few days had been hell, waking up, throwing up, after class, throwing up, during class, running out and throwing up. It was getting so fucking ridiculous to the point where I was feeling downright weak and exhausted. I knew I had to see a doctor and get actual meds because nothing was working at this point. It was fucking miserable being like this.

Ontop of the fact that it was Edward and I's one month anniversary and my Birthday, and we were going to take the day off of classes for the afternoon and evening and spend it together and go out to dinner. He'd been so sweet, making me breakfast, that I threw up after only morning class before dragging myself home. Edward had come home after his class ending at twelve and found me in the bathroom.

The stomach flu fucking sucked ass.

" Here, baby. Drink this, and eat some pretzels."

" No food." I mumbled around the glass of gingerale.

He gave me a look and I grabbed one of the small pretzel sticks and chewed slowly. The liquid soothed my stomach and Edward sat on the floor and wrapped his arm around me.

" If this isn't better by tomorrow we're going to the doctor, okay? I don't want you losing any weight from this, you're too fucking small."

I nodded in agreement and drank more. Edward helped me change into one of his t-shirts and I slipped my jeans off before getting into bed. He laid next to me, insisting he didn't want to leave and didn't care if he got sick, too.

I was able to get some pretzels down and Edward made some jello, which was also easy to eat. My body just felt exhausted, I fell in and out of sleep, and I knew Edward was getting more worried as the time went on. I was restless and couldn't sleep for more than just twenty minutes without getting up and feeling more nauseas.

" Maybe we should go now." he said at around seven in the evening.

" No, no. Then I'll be forced to stay overnight. I promise, tomorrow morning, okay? Baby, I feel fine; I'm just tired and my stomach is sick. There's no blood spewing out of me, right? I'm not feeling dizzy or like I'm passing out. I just want to sleep for awhile, my stomach feels more settled." I rambled out, trying to assure him that I was alright.

Edward relented and said he'd be back in ten minutes, making himself dinner and eating downstairs. The smell of the food wafting upstairs brought the nausea back and I burrowed into my pillows and sipped the ginger ale.

When he came back he had brought me some cut up fruit, wanting me to get some nutrients in me as well as a Gatorade for some sugar and electrolytes, so it'd give me more vitamins than the soda. I was able to eat the fruit and drink the Gatorade, and he wanted to check my temperature even though I knew I didn't have a fever. My body wasn't hot, and I didn't have the chills. Everything else felt normal.

" Edward, I don't have a fever." I mumbled with the thermometer in my mouth.

When he took it out it was ninety seven exactly, my normal temperature since I was a kid.

" I'm just worried about you, love." he sighed, kissing my forehead.

Everything was alright for the rest of the night, we went to bed and my stomach seemed to have calmed a lot. I didn't take anything for it, not wanting to take the medicine if I felt better even though he tried to argue with me. Edward had left the pretzels and Gatorade as well as ginger ale at my bedside to reach for during the night if I got up and felt hungry, and told me to wake him if I was getting sick again.

Until seven thirty I was fine, and that was when the throwing up began. Edward had been in the shower, and I had been asleep until my stomach lurched and I rushed into the bathroom. He rinsed off his body and hair before getting out, wrapping a towel around his waist before leaning down towards me.

Somehow I was able to coerce him into letting me lay down and calm down for a moment, until I felt sick again and knew I had to go to the hospital to get this under control. He wrapped his arm around me and helped me up. I slipped on a pair of shorts under the shirt I wore of his and then put on my moccasins.

Edward grabbed my bag and phone for me and we headed out to the doctor. Luckily my stomach stayed okay in the car, but when we walked through the doors of the Emergency room I ended up rushing to the nearest trash can. Despite how busy they were, two nurses immediately came to my side and were admitting me into the hospital. They took my blood pressure, sugar and asked me a whole slew of questions as I sat in a room in a wheelchair as they wrapped a bracelet around my wrist.

They already had me on file, from when I had transferred my physical therapy from Forks to here after my accident, so they had all my history, they were just adding to today's information. The nice nurse led me into a hospital room and set me up with an IV, saying I was a little dehydrated. Edward sat next to my bed and held my hand.

" Don't worry, everything is going to be okay."

I laid my head back on the weird, uncomfortable pillows with the thin blanket around me. I had taken my mocassins off but they didn't tell me I had to change into a gown so I stayed in my attire, feeling more comfortable this way anyways.

He kissed my forehead and then my hand.

" This completely sucks." I whined.

Edward laughed, " I know, baby, but the doctors are going to figure out what's wrong and give you medicine and it'll be alright."

There was a doctor in the room quickly, introducing himself as Dr. Sawyer, and started asking questions. He was asking me how long I had been getting sick, and previous issues with this and I ended up telling him about the miscarriage during the summer, because only Forks Hospital had that on their files and he immediately started asking about when I was throwing up, if anything specifically triggered it and what not while I answered the questions the best that I could

Everything seemed to go fast, and the doctor seemed very nervous despite the fact that their job was to keep their cool so It only freaked me the fuck out. A nurse came in and took some blood, and while they ran some tests the doctor gently lifted my shirt and gently pressed into my sides, asking if I felt any pain or discomfort. Lower there was a little discomfort but not enough for me to really complain about too much. It felt weird and foreign. He was writing things down on my chart furiously before telling me a nurse would check in with me in about fifteen minutes.

Within those fifteen minutes I was only throwing up more, and they had brought me a container while Edward found a hair tie in my bag and pulled my hair out of my face for me, rubbing my back softly. The nurses were sympathetic and offered ginger ale, which I eagerly agreed to take because it had helped me so much yesterday.

I only ended up throwing up the ginger ale and felt completely disgusting as I did. I fucking hated throwing up. I wiped my mouth and blew my nose before asking for a new container, what was in the current one now was enough for me to throw up at the sight of it.

I was laying back, and Edward had put a cool cloth on my forehead from the exertion my body was going through.

A doctor came back in with a nurse about fifteen minutes later while my stomach rolled. Dr. Sawyer had a grim look on his face as he sat down in a chair, looking over some sheets and flipping them back and forth. The nurse was wheeling in an ultra sound machine and everything, and she gave me a small smile before standing next to the doctor. I glanced at the ultra sound machine with wide eyes, but knew they also used this to find ulcers and other things. Edward looked over at me, showing me with his eyes that whatever it was it was going to be alright.

" Well, Mr. and Mrs. Cullen I guess I could say we have good and bad news." Dr. Sawyer started.

I took a deep breath and nodded, resting my hand on my stomach.

" Well, Mrs. Cullen, I am happy to tell you that the blood results came back and showed that you are pregnant, but we are very concerned on how this will progress considering the injuries that you have sustained and the previous miscarriage because the embryo was unable to develop. You are very, very early in your pregnancy, I'd say about a month. You do take birth control?"

I nodded nervously, my mind spinning, " Yes, I had changed in the summer, which was how I'd gotten pregnant, because I'd switched and it didn't kick in right away. I'm taking the new one and it's now just a monthly shot. I actually have an appointment tomorrow to get the shot, I get it the mid of every month."

" And I assume you don't use extra protection, such as condoms."

" We had to for awhile, but then we just stopped because the birth control was working but I guess..." I sighed, trailing off.

" We want to immediately get you on prenatal vitamins and a diet plan, as well as possible bed rest. If you want any chance of keeping this baby there are many things you are going to have to start and stop doing in order for this to progress. No strenuous activity or walking around too much, eating lots of nutrients and proteins for the baby. You see, Bella, it's not as if your uterus is unable to work obviously, but since your pelvic area had been crushed you had reconstructive surgery on many organs. Your uterus isn't what I would say deformed, but we are very surprised that you are able to simply produce in general. The baby might be able to survive inside of you if we take this day by day very carefully."

" How did this happen?" Edward said with his head in his hands.

The doctor looked at Edward, " Well, Mr. Cullen, you seem to be very potent if Mrs. Cullen is on birth control and still able to conceive; I'm surprised you weren't recommended to use extra protection during intercourse."

The nurse wanted to take an ultrasound of my stomach, and in the middle of the screen I could see just a small black, bean sized little thing in the middle. It was so incredibly tiny, and I was surprised I could see it but it was right there…

" That's the baby right there" she pointed out quietly.

After cleaning off my stomach the Dr. Sawyer was writing me out prescriptions for vitamins and the nurse was wheeling the machine out of the room. I put my head back against the pillows and covered my face, shaking my head.

" I can't lose this baby, Edward. I can't do that again, now that I know? What am I supposed to do? Take online classes again? I can't be going on runs or getting up and running back and forth between college buildings. And Esme? She's probably going to freak the fuck out about this."

Edward stood up from the chair and came next to me, holding my hands to either side of his face.

" It's going to be okay. I'm going to take care of you and we're going to do everything we can not to lose this baby; but Bella if something happens you can't blame yourself. I know it's fucking hard but please, I don't want us getting our hopes up only for us to be disappointed." he said, sitting at the edge of the bed and moving his hands to my still flat stomach.

I knew that he was right. We couldn't be getting excited about this because it would only crush the both of us if something did happen, and although there was already a part of me that loved this little tiny baby, I knew I couldn't crumble like I had the first time knowing the possibilities for my future. Our future.

" I love you, my beautiful girl. I'm going to take care of you, I promise." he said, repeating his previous statement before holding me in his arms.

A nutritionist had come in the room and talked to us for about a half hour straight, telling me certain foods to stay away from, and she said to stray away from any and all caffeine because of the special circumstances we were dealing with.

She mentioned staying away from raw foods such as sushi and hell, even raw cookie dough. As well as hot dogs and lunch meats because they are prone to listeria monosytogens, which is a bacteria that can actually cause a miscarriage, stillbirth or health problems. She said no raw vegetable sprouts, which I never consumed anyways, and no unpasteurized juices and BPA, which is plastic lined or canned foods. I basically felt as if I should eat nothing but salad for the rest of my pregnancy.

Another important thing she mentioned was that if Edward had any allergies to any types of food, I should steer clear of them because the baby could be prone to it as well. And Edward was only aware of himself being allergic to apricots, which was pretty random and I never really ate them anyways.

Afterwards the doctor came in with prescriptions and talked more to be about taking care of myself while the nurse took out my IV. He told me to drink a lot of water and even Gatorade to stay hydrated if I kept throwing up like I had been, and he had given me a few tips and foods to help with the nausea that were safe. They told me if I was getting profusely sick the way I was even after taking the vitamins and eating different foods, then to come back immediately.

On the way home Edward was on the phone with Esme, who was completely worried about me and was going on and on about coming to New York to take care of me, but we calmed her and convinced her that it was alright, and whatever was going to happen would happen.

Edward helped me get comfortable in bed, and there was a bowl and paper towels by my side if I got sick as well as water and some crackers for me to eat. I felt like shit, and probably looked like it as well.

" I hate seeing you like this." Edward said, laying next to me and letting me curl up against him. He rubbed my back and kissed me, wanting to soothe me in some way but the nausea lingered. I was able to drink sprite since it had no caffeine, and that helped a lot with nausea like the doctor has suggested.

" I'm going to make a salad, maybe but some hard-boiled eggs in there for a little protein, hm?"

" Okay." I said, curling up against his pillow as he moved from the bed, giving me a gentle kiss on my forehead and resting his hand on my stomach.

" I love you."

" I love you, too."

He went downstairs and left me with Zoey and the TV remote.

And my thoughts.

I couldn't sit here and say I didn't want to be pregnant, because I knew there were women out there with no chance of even getting pregnant period, but I didn't want this child inside of me only for it to die. I didn't want to live everyday wondering if it would be the day that I'd lose this baby.

It was a perfect combination of Edward and I, and I knew that any child of Edward's wouldn't be less than beautiful and I didn't want to lose that, I didn't want to wonder when I'd lose it. Tears fell down my eyes but I remembered that I needed to not stress out about this. Stress would affect the baby.

After a deep breath I put on something good for the TV and pet the top of Zoey's fluffy head, scratching the back of her neck like she loved.

Edward returned with food, and I hesitantly ate but he had filled it with lots of vegetables so I forced it down although my stomach did not want any of it.

When I finished the bowl he put it off to the side and curled up behind me, kissing the back of my neck, moving my hair to work his way up to my ear.

" No matter what happens we'll work through it, okay?"

" I'm scared. I'm scared of losing this baby but at the same time I'm scared of having this baby."

" Shh, don't cry. I can't stand to see you crying." he whispered, turning me around and wiping my tears from my face. " It's going to be hard, and we don't know what the fuck is going to happen but we have to hope that whatever does is what's best."

I nodded, " I know, you're right."

I ended up passing out in bed for a few hours, feeling extremely exhausted from today's events. I awoke in the evening and ate a little bit more of the salad Edward had made before going back to bed and literally sleeping through the complete rest of the day and night until the next morning when I awoke to a lurch in my stomach.

Edward was still asleep, it still being early in the morning until classes started. I moved Edward's heavy arm off of me and flew to the bathroom, holding my hair back as everything in my stomach came up. I must have woken Edward because I felt him behind me, grabbing my hair. He reached for a ponytail and tied my hair out of my face before sitting on the floor and rubbing my back.

" Go, you don't want to see this." I groaned before lurching forward again, my stomach heaving.

" I'm going to be here with you every fucking moment of this, so don't push me away."

He went to the cabinets and grabbed a cloth, wetting it with cool water and pressing it to my forehead. I held it there with my elbow on the toilet rim, sighing deeply but still feeling my stomach rumble uncomfortably.

" I'll get you something to drink, alright?"

I nodded and he got up, yawning and running his hand through his sleep-messy hair. He wore only his fitted boxer briefs and I smiled seeing his sexy ass.

Even pregnant and throwing up I was insatiable. Fuck.

Something twisted in my stomach again and I closed my eyes to avoid seeing all of the salad I ate, flushing the toilet and immediately wiping off my mouth and spitting out everything. I leaned back against the tub and Edward came up with can of ginger ale and a straw. It was nice and ice cool so it felt good to drink.

" Thanks." I sighed, leaning against his shoulder and sipping at the drink.

" I wish you weren't this sick."

" You're telling me." I grumbled. " I get to spend the days after my twenty first birthday throwing up, and not because I'm going to bars and getting completely wasted."

Edward lifted me up, after letting me brush my teeth and set me in his lap as he laid against the headboard, me curled up against him with my can of soda. It was six in the morning, and I had class at eight, and work later on.

" Babe, you can't go to school and work like this, and the doctor said he basically wants you on bed rest."

" How about we wait until I see an OB-GYN?"

" Do you want to take these chances, Bella?"

" What am I supposed to do, Edward?!"

" You can do what you did after the accident. Except this time you can go talk to your professors about the situation and doing the online classes. They did it before, I'm sure they'll do it now.

Tears sprung my eyes, " I don't want to be stuck here alone all day."

" Baby, Monday through Wednesday I only have three classes, and then two classes on Thursday and Friday. I can cut down practices and-"

" No, Edward; I'm not going to fuck up how well you're doing because of this."

" This is why I'm here, Bella. I'm your husband it's my job to take care of you and more importantly be with you through this; and it's not even a job; I want to do this for you, for this baby."

I nodded as he wiped my tears, " Okay."

~\\~

The next day I stepped in early to all of my classes to talk to my professors, I was lucky that they understood my situation and told me that they could have my assignments sent to me online through their NYU online program. I didn't explain much but the fact that I was pregnant and there could be future complications if I don't stay on bed rest and stay stress free.

When I talked to the library, my manager Mrs. Kahl, an older woman was very sympathetic about my situation and told me not to worry about anything. I didn't want to lose my job like I had at the coffee shop, and after taking care of all of that I went out to lunch because I was starving as fuck, and Edward wanted to see me anyways.

I ordered my food before he arrived and was halfway done when he did. He kissed my cheek and got in line at Panera to order his food. He got a salad and a sandwich and sat down next to me with my half eaten bowl of soup and my sandwich already gone.

" Hungry, sweetheart?" He asked, putting his school bag down.

I nodded. " Starving, and I made breakfast this morning."

" Good, have you gotten sick?"

" Not since yesterday afternoon."

He reached for my hand and squeezed it, " That's great. How did everything go with your teachers and at work?"

I took a bite of my soup before answering, " It was great. They understood and pretty much said everything could be done online. My manager at work said not to worry about everything, so I'm hoping that means I will still have my job in a couple months or depending on what happens..."

Edward gave me a feeble smile and pulled his hand away to eat his lunch.

I put my tray above the trash can and my dishes in the little container before sitting back next to him, taking a long drink and resting my hand on my full stomach.

" What if everything goes alright?" I asked him.

He looked up at me, " Bella, if you're able to make it to at least seven months then...We'll have a baby if there are no complications. If anything happens before then; god I don't want to even think about it but then we do what we can to get through it."

I nodded and rubbed my flat stomach before setting my hand on my leg.

When we finished lunch Edward still had a half hour until class, so I drove to his campus, which was a short drive, but he didn't want me walking all too much, and we walked by the main campus area and sat on a bench, students walking back and forth between classes. He sat down on the bench and I sat with my back against the arm rest with my legs over his lap, twisting his wedding band around on his finger as I felt his hand resting on my stomach, tracing patterns.

" You're so beautiful." he murmured, leaning forward to kiss my lips. I rested my hand on his cheek and returned his kiss, tilted my head to the side and welcoming his warm tongue as it grazed over my lips.

" Hey, Masen!" I suddenly heard.

Edward pulled away from me and I looked up to see a tall guy with dark blonde hair and brown eyes. He was wearing a simple polo shirt and cargo shorts with his bag over his shoulders and a folder in his hands that said 'Music Comp'.

" Hey, Luke." Edward replied.

" Sorry to interrupt, man; I was just wondering if you had an extra copy of the notes Mr. Gaffney handed out in class this morning? I have no idea where the hell mine went."

" Let me check. Bella, this is Luke, he's in my History of American Music Classics Class. Luke, this is my wife Bella."

He smiled warmly and reached his hand out, which I shook.

" Nice to meet you. Edward talks about you a lot."

I looked over at Edward as he ruffled through his bag and smiled.

" Is that so?"

He looked over at me, " Of course, beautiful."

Edward pulled out a small packet of notes.

" I only have one copy but you can make a copy of these, just get them back to me tomorrow so that I can study them before class on Friday, cool?"

" Really? Awesome, you literally saved my life. Well, I've got class in five so I gotta go. Thanks again, Masen, and it was nice to meet you Bella."

" You, too." I said before turning back to Edward who zipped his bag shut.

" He seemed nice." I noted.

Edward nodded, " Yeah, we sit together in class so we talk a lot."

" You should go out more with friends; it would be good for you."

" I like coming home and spending time with you, making dinner, watching movies...Bed time..."

" Are we even allowed to have sex anymore?"

" We need to set up an appointment with an OB-GYN."

I nodded, " When I get home. Maybe I'll call the hospital and see who they would recommend, maybe get a hold of the doctor who I saw."

He nodded and ran his fingers through my hair, " Okay, but after that I want you to lay down and relax. I'll take care of dinner tonight as well."

" Edwa-"

" Don't fucking argue with me." he said sternly.

I moved my legs off of my lap, " Then stop sounding like you're trying to be my goddamn dad."

" I don't want anything to happen to this baby."

" You think I do?"

" No! I didn't say that. I know how independent you are Bella, you like to do things for yourself and be moving, moving all of the time; I know this and I respect that as a part of who you are, but you can't be that person you are right now. I know you hate it, but I can't sit in a hospital room with another doctor telling me that I lost my baby."

" Well, what if I lose this baby when I'm laying down resting, huh? I'm all fucked up from that goddamn accident, Edward. They said that I lost the last baby because I probably don't have the right home in its normal form to carry a baby!"

He put his hands on either side of my face, " I know, I know this but please; please do this for me, Bella. I don't ask much, I just can't see that broken look in your eyes because it breaks me apart too. I can't fucking do it again and we might have a chance. I want you to call the OB-GYN today when you get home today, we can get a more proper ultra-sound of you and see how everything looks, okay? I'm not saying you can't go downstairs to get a cup of tea or make a snack, but I don't want you running around New York, or around the house cleaning. I want you to do what you need to do for you and that's it. I'll take care of everything else, okay?"

Tears ran down my face and he wiped them with his hand and kissed my forehead before pulling me in his arms.

" Okay." I whispered against his chest.

" I love you so much. I don't want anything to happen to the two of you." he whispered.

I nodded and wiped my tears, " I know, Edward."

He looked at his watch and sighed, " I have to get to class, baby. But I'll be home at around four or so."

I nodded and he kissed both of my cheeks before bending down to my lips, caressing them with his for a moment before pulling away and grabbing his bag.

" Drive safely."

" I will." I assured just as he kissed my forehead and turned to walk towards the buildings.

" Edward." I called, he stopped and turned to look at me, " I love you, too."

He smiled and I walked off towards the car and headed towards the apartment. I was greeted by Zoey, rubbing her fuzzy body against my legs and weaving between them. I made some decaffeinated black tea and went upstairs; changing into a pair of comfy sweats and socks with just the simple tank I had under my previous shirt. I turned on the TV and Zoey curled up next to me.

I called the hospital just as I had said and was actually able to talk to the doctor who I had seen before, and he recommended an OB-GYN that was really close to the area working near the hospital. Apparently she had her own practice and two people working underneath her, both were woman and it made me feel more comfortable. After getting the numbers I decided to call the office, feeling butterflies in my stomach as I talked to the receptionist.

All she did was ask just some basic questions, my name, address, age and what not before setting up an appointment. They actually worked on Saturday mornings so I was able to get their last appointment of the day which was eleven thirty and scheduled it. The lady sounded very nice on the phone so I was hoping it would be a good match.

Afterwards I just cuddled up with Zoey and watched some TV.

I hadn't realized I was even tired until I fell asleep mid friends episode.

Later on I awoke to the bedroom door opening and the shower starting. I yawned and rolled over, looking towards the open bathroom door and saw Edward's form in the shower, the glass fogged up from the heat. In any situation I would've gotten my ass out of bed and joined him but I was tired, and Zoey was curled up around my feet, sprawled out all cute and fast asleep with her little chest rising and falling.

I turned my head to face the television and closed my eyes. The shower turned off and I heard Edward moving around the bathroom; the scent of his shampoo and body wash flooding into the bedroom and making it smell completely like him.

Soon after I felt him lean on the bed probably on his knee and lean over to push my hair behind my shoulder.

" Hey, you awake?" he whispered quietly.

" Mhm. How were all your classes?"

" Alright."

I felt his lips touch my cheek softly before moved around me to lay where I was facing, rousing Zoey who gave him a glare before hopping off of the bed.

" What do you want for dinner?"

" I'm not really that hungry." I said, snuggling into my pillow.

He rested his hand on my arm, rubbing up and down, " Well, too bad; you're eating."

I glared at him and he wrapped both of his hands around my wrist before pulling me up to sit in bed.

" Edward." I whined.

I wrapped my arms around him, and suddenly he lifted me completely out of bed and I squealed loudly.

" Edward!" I screamed his name as he tossed me over his shoulder.

He laughed and carried me down the stairs and set me down in the chair in our kitchen.

" You can't cook." I told him.

" I can cook." He claimed, opening up the fridge. " We have chicken, and some frozen vegetables that I can just put in the microwave. I'll just season some of the chicken and have some vegetables, sound good?"

I nodded and leaned back in the chair. He brought me a glass of ginger ale and started to cook. I sat in my chair, giving him pointers, telling him to put oil in the pan before putting the chicken in, as well as explaining that using garlic seasoning didn't need garlic _and herb_ seasoning to go with it unless he wanted bad breath. I told him a combination of seasonings that I knew he would like and he grabbed some carrots, broccoli and corn from the freezer, it was mixed in a bag and all you had to do was pop it in the microwave, and put it in a bowl and add maybe a small teaspoon of butter for some flavor and salt and pepper.

Once everything was finished, and luckily cooked without being burnt, we sat down and enjoyed dinner. Edward talked about his classes, and I told him about how I napped all day; which of course gave us a lot to talk about.

" I wish I was the pregnant one." Edward claimed.

" Maybe we can do that some time."

He smirked at me and set his fork down on his empty plate and took a sip of coke, which I gazed longingly at.

" I talked to my mom after class on my walk home."

" Yeah?"

" I told her that we're just going day by day right now, not to freak out or get excited about anything."

I set my utensils down and rested my hand on my stomach, " I want to be excited, Edward."

Tears welled up in my eyes and I took a deep breath, wanting them to go away because I didn't want to fucking cry over this.

" So do I, sweetheart." he said, holding my free hand tightly over the table.

" I want to have your children, god, I'd have eight of them if I could."

He chuckled, " That's a lot of kids."

" I don't care."

Edward grabbed our dishes and put them in the dishwasher before lifting me bridal style into our living room.

" I can walk you know." I said, sitting down on the couch and letting my legs fold underneath me.

He grabbed the remote and put something on TV, which I saw as American Dad before he collapsed down on the couch next to me with his arm reaching out. I rested my head against his shoulder and leaned against him.

" Carrying you around is just way too much fun."

I grabbed the throw blanket off of the couch; it was thick and fluffy and wrapped it around my body before leaning against the arm rest of the couch with my legs in Edward's lap. He played with the long ties of my sweatpants before he was laying between my legs with his head on my stomach, my shirt bunched around my bust as he pressed soft, gentle kisses to the skin exposed.

He was being so gentle and soft as his hand moved over my side, as if he were trying to cradle my stomach.

My fingers weaved through his hair and soon he was passed out on me, arms wrapped protectively around my stomach. I let us lay on the couch until around nine until I woke Edward up and we headed upstairs. He brushed his teeth and changed which I brushed my own teeth and washed my face clean and just grabbed one of Edward's t-shirts before getting into bed. He wrapped his arms around me and kissed me, tilting his head to the side and deepening our kiss.

" I love you so much, and I want you to know that I'm going to do anything I can do make everything work out." he whispered.

I nodded, " I know...I forgot to tell you at dinner, it slipped my mind but I made an appointment with an OB-GYN near here. Her name is Dr. Jenner, and she has two ladies as well in her own practice. I have an appointment Saturday at 11:30. I figured it worked with your school and everything."

He nodded, " I don't care if I miss a class, baby. You're more important. This is more important." he said, resting his hand on my stomach before sliding it over my hip and holding me closer.

I leaned towards him and gave him a chaste kiss before leaning my head against his chest.

Somehow, in some way we'd get through this.

I hoped.

**Authors Note- Thoughts? Love you, guys and I hope you're all having a wonderful beginning to a new year!**


	58. The Strength to Go On

**Authors Note- Hello everybody. We are entering another month and I hope all of you guys had a great beginning to 2013! I sure have, which is why chapters are harder to get out but I'm still here!**

**Disclaimer- S. Meyer owns all things Twilight.**

**Chapter Song- The Strength To Go On by: Rise Against**

~\\~

September 18th

Saturday

~\\~

I laid back on the lounged recliner with Edward sitting next to me as Dr. Jenner sat down on her stool and was rolling over the ultra-sound machine. It was way more high-tech then the one at the hospital, with chords and tools attached to the side of it that I didn't even know existed. She set the transducer on the side of the bench and looked at me kindly, sweeping her light blonde bangs out of her hair.

Honestly, I hadn't expected her to be so young, she looked fresh out of school but Dr. Jenner was so nice and had her practice for almost five years. She asked many questions, and Edward and I had gotten my papers from the accident and the miscarriage faxed down to them today and she went over them and said we'd do the ultrasound to see my uterus and the baby. She also told me the hospital could to an ultrasound of my pelvis to see if there was any damage, or any disfiguration, to my reproductive organs. I knew there was damage, but there hadn't been anything said much about if there was anything disfigured and not in the right form.

I'd only been told I'd not be able to get pregnant. And here I was, pregnant for the second time.

I also talked to her about my birth control, and she told me that maybe it wasn't working with me for some reason due to the miscarriage, or just my body in general. Or she said it was a possibility that Edward was just very potent, which made him cough and look down at the floor with tipped red ears. I didn't even know that man could get embarrassed.

" Alright, Bella, so how about you just unbutton you jeans and push them a little below your hips and raise your shirt up for me." she said as she grabbed a bottle of jell and I adjusted myself as she had said to. Edward grabbed my hand as she put the gel all over my stomach and grabbed the transducer, pressing it against my stomach. The gel was lukewarm, so I didn't shiver from the feel of it.

When she started to move it around I could hear a pretty prominent thumping noise that was mixed with the _whoosh whoosh_ noises in the room. It bounced off the walls and pierced through me, bringing a smile to my face.

" You have got a baby with a very strong heartbeat, that is very good news, Bella." she smiled at me before looking around the monitor and moving it around. I stared at the screen and she paused for a moment and lifted her hand towards a small bean shaped thing; pointing to it.

" That right there is your baby. You seem to be about exactly a month along."

Edward looked at me and rested his head on my shoulder, a small smile on his face.

Then she started moving the tool all around my stomach, looking around the edges of my little beans home before printing out a couple of pictures and turning the machine off.

" To be perfectly honest, Bella, your uterus according to my machine tells me that you look just fine. But I still think it would be a good idea to get an ultrasound of your pelvis and all around to make sure, and maybe start making your appointments here every two weeks. If anything seems off then I want you to definitely give us a call, alright? You already have your prenatal vitamins and the hospital pretty much covered foods and what to stay away from and what's good for you. I also agree that with your past history that you do take it easy and stay mostly on bed rest. For now that's all we can do, but we're hoping for the best." she told us, smiling at the end.

I nodded, " Okay."

As she put her things away she smiled at Edward as he helped me get the gel off of my stomach.

" How long have you both been married?"

" Just a little over a month."

She smiled, " Oh, newlyweds. Congratulations."

" Thank you." Edward replied, tossing the paper towels in the garbage as I buttoned my jeans and pulled my shirt down..

" Alright, well you can make an appointment with my receptionist, and definitely follow up on me with the hospital reports for the ultra-sound of your pelvis if you can get in within two weeks, in fact you can have them fax everything to me."

" We'll definitely be sure to do that, thank you so much." I said, slowly lifting off of the reclined seat.

Edward came to my side, holding my bag and sweatshirt for me as he came to my side.

" Okay, well I hope to see you both in two weeks. If you have any questions Bella don't be afraid to call to talk to me. I just want everything to work out for you two, you've been through a lot but this baby seems to be a strong little fighter." she said, sounding sympathetic but brightening her tone at the end.

I gave her a feeble smile and Edward held me against his side.

" Thank you, and we will be here. Have a good afternoon." Edward said as we all walked out of the room.

She headed towards her office and we headed out to the receptionist to make our appointment in two weeks, exactly, on a Saturday but at ten this time. Afterwards we got in the car and Edward made a call to the hospital and was able to get a hold of the Dr. Sawyer luckily. They talked for a moment and I got an appointment for Tuesday in the evening for them to do a quick ultra-sound of my pelvis and then he called Esme and told her how everything went today; and she sounded hopeful for us.

I wasn't so sure.

When he got off the phone he reached over for my hand and held it tightly.

" Are you alright?" Edward asked, looking at me.

I nodded, " Yeah; I'm just nervous, you know? For future months how everything goes..."

" I know. But we're getting that other ultra-sound done on you and we'll see what's going on and maybe if there is a possibility that you can do this."

" We." I told him.

He weaved his fingers through mine and gave them a squeeze before we pulled up to the house and got out of the car. I unlocked the door and of course, Zoey had been waiting for us to give her some lunch. I gave her a small scoop and she ran off to eat while Edward tossed his keys on the small table by the door that had our bowl of keys, spares and mail on the side.

" What do you want to do?" he asked, wrapping his arms around me.

" Sleep all day." I answered honestly, that's all I'd been wanting to do.

He chuckled, " I know, we'll get to that but first how about you have some lunch?"

I shrugged and he rolled his eyes before going into the fridge. He tossed me a bottle of vitamin water and plated a bowl of salad with some dressing.

" I know you aren't that hungry, but eat some of this to get something in you."

With a sigh, I complied with him and he made himself two hot pockets and drank a coke with them. I looked at him, rolling my eyes back at him about his eating habits. On any day that would be my meal; god how I missed Chicken Jalapeño hot pockets, but spicy anything was off the table for me.

I drank my water and ate all of the salad until it was gone. Since I was tired Edward just dragged me into the spare room where we usually studied and handed me a book as I laid down on the couch and rested my head on the throw pillow. He grabbed his bag and dumped his books and papers out before starting on his work.

I was flipping through pages for about an hour until I completely crashed, as per usual the past week, god, I wished I wasn't so tired but I couldn't fight it.

Sleep overcame me.

~\\~

EPOV

~\\~

I glanced over at Bella just as the book laid on her chest and she fell asleep, looking peaceful and relaxed. There wasn't the crease in her forehead I permanently saw, or the look of uncertainty that went with it.

I didn't know what the fuck was going to happen, and I was scared shitless that we were going to lose this baby but I was trying to show some hope for Bella because I knew she really had none. I knew she wanted this to work out, even though we were young and still had school, but losing the last baby had been enough and we didn't even know she was carrying, this time we knew. It was real and I already loved the little bean shaped baby in her stomach. It was my family.

Losing that would break me, and I knew it would break Bella.

I worked on my homework until everything was finished about three hours later, so it was already dinner time and my stomach was growling once more with hunger. After putting everything away in the room I grabbed Bella's book and put it back on the shelf before lifting her up into my arms. She woke up almost immediately, but snuggled against me as I carried her light body down the stairs and put her on the couch before going to make dinner.

The past couple of nights I'd just been making Bella chicken and really simple meals with a lot of vegetables; I was obsessed with her diet now. Tonight I just followed directions on the back of the Italian breadcrumbs container and made some chicken with a cream basil sauce over it and of course, steamed vegetables. I softened carrots and then added a little bit of melted butter with salt and pepper.

I was turning into Betty Crocker.

Bella lazed up from the couch with a sigh and looked up at me after seeing the plate.

" I'm sorry I've turned into a lazy ass wife."

I laughed and went to her side, kissing her forehead softly.

" You aren't a lazy ass wife. Just a tired as fuck wife. And maybe it's good for the baby for you to sleep, hm? You rest and the baby can rest, right?"

She gave another one of her shrugs, " Maybe...This is really good."

" Thank the breadcrumb container."

A laugh escaped her, one of her real laughs and it felt good to hear it. We ate dinner and talked quietly to each other. Our usual conversation, trying to divert away from everything going on but it lingered in the air. After dinner we cleaned everything up and went upstairs. Bella had gotten e-mails and what not from her teachers about some classes and wanted to do some work so she wouldn't get more behind. I lounged in bed beside her, watching Dawn of the Dead but glancing at her as she was writing things down and flipping through her books.

She turned in at around eight and set her laptop aside and put her books in the next room, Zoey following her back into the bedroom. She ran and jumped onto the bed before curling up next to me, and I had to admit; I loved this little thing the moment I found it shivering in the bathtub scared. Bella always joked that she was my girlfriend because when I'm home she rarely leaves my side unless she's napping downstairs.

" She's obsessed with you." Bella said, slipping her shirt off and shimmying out of her jeans.

I watched her bend over and grab the clothes and toss them in the hamper before facing her dresser and opening it up. My eyes raked over her flesh and I felt myself stirring in my jeans watching her, needing her. I felt like we hadn't had sex in forever, when in reality it was probably just a week. She unhooked the back of her bra and I could just see the curve of her-

And then she put a tank top on quicker than I could even blink. Without bothering with shorts and giving me a nice view of her ass by putting on a pair of boy short underwear, she kneeled on the bed and glared at me with a playful smirk.

" You're eyes burn holes into my skin."

I looked at her after looking away from the TV nonchalantly, petting Zoey's fur softly.

" What, sweetheart?"

She lifted Zoey and set her off to the side before putting both hands on my shoulders and kissing me, her long brown hair cascading around us. I felt some sort of relief with her lips on me, but I still needed more and I felt so fucking selfish.

Why the fuck didn't we ask the doctors about sex?

She tasted like mint from brushing her teeth after dinner, and a hint of the cinnamon gum she had been chewing as she did her homework. I grabbed her hips and pulled her on top of me into my lap; she started to move them against mine and I was a goner.

" Bella." I groaned.

" What?" she asked, pulling away and running her fingers through her hair to push it out of her face.

Fuck she's so beautiful.

" I'm going to spontaneously combust if we go any further."

She gave me a look and sat back on her feet, " What do you mean?"

" It's not like we can..." I trailed off, motioning between us.

" I talked to the doctor when you went to the bathroom before the ultrasound, she told me she saw no problem as long as we weren't being rough. But if I felt any pain or anything to stop."

Thank fuck.

" Really?" I breathed.

" Yeah."

" I won't like...Poke the little human."

The look on her face told me that I was a fucking idiot, " No, Edward, you won't poke the baby. It's too small for one, and two I'm pretty sure you don't reach my organs." she told me with a laugh before snuggling her head into my shoulder.

I rolled on top of her, " That's kind of offending."

" Oh, I'm sorry, Edward; you aren't big enough to hit my uterus." she said in a teasing tone before stripping me of my shirt and pressing her hands against my chest, tracing the small 'B' on my ribcage and moving her hand over the scar from my lung collapsing.

I looked down into her brown eyes and it felt like everything was fucking new again. Our first date, our first few days spending time together, our first kiss and when we had made love before I left. It was overwhelming, and I couldn't believe that as I looked down at her now she was my wife.

My beautiful, strong, amazing wife; and she was carrying a little baby that we created inside of her that I hoped would hang on for dear life.

" I love you."

" I love you, too." she said, her fingers wrapping around the leather cord around my neck that had my cross on it for as long as I remembered. Though I'd hid it many years under clothes; I always kept it there.

I cradled her face in my hand, " Do you know how precious you are to me?"

Her smile could light up fucking Times Square, and she leaned forward and gave me a soft kiss.

" Just as much as you are to me."

" I don't know where I'd be without you." I said, holding her tightly to me.

" I don't know where I'd be either." She said, " Are you okay, baby?"

My eyes met hers again, " I just want you to know how much I love you, how much I need you. I hope that no matter what happens that can hold it all together." I said quietly to her, hoping she understood what I meant.

She rubbed up and down my back as our lips met and moved together. I braced myself on either side of her, not wanting to put my weight on her. My hands brushed away the straps of her tank top and I kissed her soft, bare shoulders. Her skin was warm and sweet, and a quiet noise escaped her as she kissed the side of my neck exposed to her.

That night I worshipped her, cherished her and showed her how much she meant to me in more ways than telling her.

~\\~

There was nothing that could beat waking up in the morning with my bare body wrapped about Bella's.

It was the fucking best.

She lay on her stomach with her head resting on my neck, her face angled towards me. My body pressed against hers, and we were only covered from the waist down, giving me a view of her smooth, tanned back. It was slowly fading from our honeymoon, and it was already getting a little chilly here in New York so we were more covered up.

I felt my bladder filled and begging for relief, so I carefully laid Bella's head on my pillow and went to the bathroom. When I came back she was awake, the comforter pulled up to her chest and looking tiredly at the door. It was early morning, and I quickly hopped into bed. She pulled the blanket away from her to let me into her little warm cocoon. My body wrapped around hers, and she pulled the comforter around both of us up to our necks and snuggled into my chest, arms wrapping around to my back as mine went around her tiny waist.

I wondered if her stomach would grow, a small little bump showing in a few months. I wanted that; to see her stomach swelled with our little baby.

" Why'd you wake up, hm?" I hummed against her forehead.

" The pillow wasn't sufficient."

I chuckled and wrapped my arms around her even tighter. I buried my face in her hair and kissed the top of her head.

A shiver ran through her body and she sighed, " Mm, it's so cold in this room."

" I can plug in the heater, babe. I don't don't want to put the heat on too early."

I slipped out of bed and grabbed a fresh pair of boxers on the way before plugging in the little heater for the bedroom; it would be warm in ten minutes if I put it on high so that when the heat of the oil inside warmed up it would radiate the heat throughout the room. I moved it away from the wall and got my ass back in bed, grabbing her underwear and flinging it at her. She giggled and adjusted underneath the sheets, and then I tossed one of my hoodies at her and she pulled it on quickly.

She smelled my sweatshirt and smiled, " I think I wear these more than you do."

I pulled her ontop of me, " That's perfectly fine with me." I said, kissing her forehead before she laid her head on my chest and started to slowly fall asleep. I kept my fingers running through her hair softly. It was silk between my fingers.

Bella fell in and out of sleep over the next hour before suddenly she was pushing me off of her and bolting to the bathroom.

And fuck I was hoping the barfing was over.

I heard her heave before the sound of...Whatever the fuck was in her stomach at this time came pouring out. I got out of bed, grabbing a ponytail from the end table. She bent over the toilet and I grabbed her hair around her, pulling it out of her face before tying it back.

She leaned forward again, stomach acid depositing from her and I grabbed the empty cup we left on the counter and rinsed it before filling it with cold water. When she had leaned back and wiped her mouth I gave her the glass and she drowned the contents. Her throat was already burning, and ginger ale would only add fuel to the fire.

" Thanks." she said, resting her hand on her stomach.

I helped her off the floor and she brushed her teeth slowly before laying back in bed, her back against the headboard.

" I hate this." she sighed, taking a sip of the re-filled glass of water.

I sat on the side of the bed and rested my hand on her stomach.

" I'm sorry, sweetheart."

" It's not your fault."

" Well, technically."

Bella looked at me with a feeble smile, " You're just really determined to make me have your baby, huh?"

I gave her a small smile, " Well, not me exactly; but a certain part of me yes."

I leaned forward and gave her a small kiss. " How's your stomach now?"

She sighed, " It feels all weird gurgle-y."

" Well, I'll grab your vitamins for you and get you a ginger ale."

" I can get it myself."

As my body leaned over her she laid back, I kissed her forehead, " I'll take care of it. Stay here."

I went downstairs and grabbed one of each of her vitamins as well as some ginger ale and saltine crackers. I brought it up to her and she thanked me while I told her I was going to shower. I could still feel the sweat on my body from last night, and Bella's scent; although I didn't want to wash it off of me the sweat made me feel gross. Just as I was rinsing out my hair the glass door slid open and Bella stood naked in front of me. Soap burned my eyes but I didn't give a shit. She laughed and reached up, telling me to close my eyes and massaging my head to get all of the shampoo out. I blindly reached for her shampoo and put it in my hand, washing her long hair. Although I was finished showering I had no problem helping her.

Being in the heat too long she said made her nauseas so I kneeled on the floor as she rinsed the shampoo and reached for the conditioner, washing each of her soft, smooth legs. Since she had waxed them they felt amazing, but she said in a week she'd have to get them done again.

So fucking worth it.

I placed a kiss on her stomach before lathering it up and moving upwards until I got to her collarbone and pushed her chest against mine, running her loofa down her back and cleaning her off. I knew that I now probably smelled like fruity, girly body wash but it was worth it. I slipped out of the shower and let her stay in while I grabbed towels. I wrapped one around my waist and grabbed one for her. Once she dried off she put on her robe and put her hair up in the towel to dry.

I ruffled my hair with my towel and let it do its own thing, but I had to fucking shave because I was looking a little rough. I accidentally nicked myself near my jaw when Bella was suddenly bent down over the toilet throwing up ginger ale and crackers.

" Oh, fuck, fuck, fuck." she groaned before heaving forward again. I washed my face, wincing at my cut and ripping a piece of tissue off to place it on the cut.

" What's wrong?"

" Nothing, nothing. Ginger ale just doesn't feel good coming back up."

I rubbed her back while she flushed the toilet and brushed her teeth again, frowning at my cut. She kissed next to it.

" I'm sorry."

" Don't be." I said, kissing her forehead before going into the bedroom while she blow dried her hair. I put on a pair of jeans and a long sleeved shirt with a hoodie over it. I ran my fingers through my hair and twisted my lip rings as I jogged downstairs for breakfast.

Damn, I missed Bella's Sunday bacon, eggs and toast...

I put some bacon on the stove and scrambled eggs in a bowl while I tried not to burn toast. The breakfast was mediocre at best, and when I was finished up and cleaning up all of my dishes and emptying out the dishwasher Bella came downstairs with her towel and previous clothes.

She was wearing a pair of leggings and one of my oversized hoodies that almost went to her knee's. It was fucking adorable. Her hair tumbled down her back in beautiful dark chocolate waves.

I was so lucky not only to have a caring and loving wife, but one that was fucking gorgeous as well.

She wrapped her arms around my waist from behind as I shut the dishwasher and put the final plate in the cabinet. I turned around and lifted her body off of the ground; making her squeal loudly.

" Edward!"

I set her down and gave a swift slap to her ass and told her to pop in a movie in the living room. I went and grabbed my laptop and was typing out a few assignments, and handed it over to Bella soon enough because she wanted to work on a few of hers as well since she was behind a couple of days. She was working on a thesis and simple notes and other sheets.

Her professors were making everything so easy for her, and I was extremely impressed and happy about that.

Maybe for once everything would work out.

~\\~

The rest of September as well as October seemed to pass by in a flurry, and New York was already swirling around with light snow and people were preparing for the upcoming holidays.

Although the morning sickness was still coming around, but luckily not as often, Bella was doing well. She was already three months pregnant and showing the smallest little bump. We had gone to the hospital on our appointed day and got Bella an ultra-sound of her pelvis. Dr. Sawyer told us that there were certain parts of her uterus around the lower side edges that could show damage from the accident. But all around she was looking alright, and the baby was developing as it should.

I gave updates to my mom, and Bella had decided to tell Renee since she was already three months along. She was absolutely ecstatic, but at the same time still fearful for what was to come.

We were still going day by fucking day, and as each day kept going and going I started to become less fearful that something would happen. Bella was still going to her appointments every two weeks, and the baby was progressing very well. Dr. Jenner said everything was looking good, but she was still telling us to be cautious and for Bella to be resting plenty.

And she was. Most of the day she was either sleeping, doing homework on the laptop, eating and going to the bathroom; she hated being in bed all the time but she knew it was for the right reasons. I started to spend a little more extra time at school, but made sure I talked to Bella throughout the day to see how she was doing. Every day was different. Some days she was in the fucking bathroom all day throwing up, others she was completely at ease relaxing.

And some she was yelling at me to stop fucking calling her because she was fine.

God, I loved this woman anyways.

It was already mid-November, and the semester was coming to an end the beginning of December. I'd only have one semester left until graduating in the summer, and then Bella would be graduating mid-December next year.

I wondered if we would have a baby then.

Where would we be?

Her due date was about May 17th, but we hadn't been talking about planning for a baby or cleaning out the spare room and buying furniture. My mom hadn't said much, I guessed it was because we were in a good place now nobody wanted to really say much, just take it slow.

I parked on the curb, finally at home and happy to be there. It was dark outside and snowing like crazy. When I got inside there were a couple candles lit and I found Bella curled up on the couch reading a book. I had brought home sandwiches from her favorite place and hoped her stomach was settled enough for her to eat. I took off my wet coat and shoes and dropped my bag near the stairs before going into the living room.

She smiled when she saw me, " Hey, you. How was your day?"

I leaned down to kiss her, " Good. How about you, sweetheart?"

" I'm okay. My stomach wasn't feeling so good about an hour ago so I had some decaf tea and it helped a lot. What's in the bag?"

" I brought sandwiches for dinner; that sound good?"

" Sounds great."

Just then I heard our dryer turn off from the laundry room and make a noise.

" Don't kill me, I just did some laundry. No carrying any hampers since you brought it down this morning."

" Bella..."

She put her hand on my cheek, " I'm okay, Edward. Dr. Jenner said as long as I'm not running or going up and down stairs a lot and moving around constantly that I'm okay to walk around the house a little."

I relented and handed her the sandwich I got for her before grabbing plates and eating in the living room with her.

" I tried to put on my jeans today. I can't even button them." Bella stated.

My hand reached out to touch the small little bump.

" Not letting your mommy fit into her pants are you?" I said, leaning close to her stomach.

Neither of us realized the words that came out of my mouth until Bella smiled at me, tears in her eyes as she put her hand over mine on her stomach.

" I want to be excited, Edward." she told me.

" Be excited, baby. I want you to be happy."

" But, what if-"

I silenced her, " No. Whatever happens from here happens and is meant to be for the both of us. I love you, and I love this baby."

She nodded and took a bite of her sandwich. I rubbed her stomach once more before finishing up my dinner and taking a long drink of water.

" You're right. Whatever happens is meant to be. It just doesn't make it easier."

" I know." I told her, grabbing her free hand and giving it a squeeze before taking our dishes.

" Next month we can find out the gender." Bella told me from the living room.

" Yeah... So maybe this weekend you want to go out shopping?"

She furrowed her brows, " For what?"

" Well, you can't wear my sweatpants forever."

" But I like them...And their stretchy."

I leaned forward and kissed her forehead, " I know, but we can get you some jeans and shirts."

" I don't want fucking maternity tops."

I laughed, " Okay, babe. We can just get flowy shit and stretchy shirts and some sizes up, okay?"

" I can't just wear your shirts and my leggings?"

" Baby, do what makes you happy; I just want you to have options."

She sighed, " You're right. We can go this weekend. I just don't have money saved up that I want to spend on clothes."

" I'll take care of you."

" Edwa-"

" I impregnated you. I pay for the expenses. Just say thank you."

She sighed, " Alright, thank you."

For part of the night she laid on the couch and read her book quietly. I did some homework downstairs, just wanting to be close to her. I was working on a composition, and tomorrow I was going to school early to practice in one of the rooms, even though I could hear the tune in my head. We'd been working on a number for the Holiday recital, and for us Seniors it was going to have to be good because for some of us it was our last holiday show.

I was just putting my books in my bag when I saw Bella peacefully asleep on the couch, wrapped up in her blanket with the book resting on her stomach. I left my bag on the coffee table and closed her book, setting it on the end table and turning off the lamp and other lights before pealing the blanket from her body and lifting her up into my arms.

Since being pregnant, Bella slept like a total rock when it came to moving her around or if I got out of bed, but noises such as the shower or cabinets/drawers opening and closing, woke her up so easily. I was glad I brushed my teeth and changed when I grabbed my books and things. I laid her gently in bed and covered her up before crawling in beside her. She immediately turned over towards me on her side, and I could feel her little baby bump against my ribcage.

I rubbed her stomach gently before putting my arm underneath her neck and letting her head rest on my shoulder before drifting off to sleep.

~\\~

BPOV

~\\~

It felt extremely weird trying on bigger clothes. I had to buy maternity pants because going up in size made them longer, but luckily they had skinny jeans in the aisle and they were stretchy in the waist. Thank fuck. I got a few flowy shirts from stores like Forever 21, AE and usual stores, and got medium sized shirts from Hot Topic and Hot Rags instead of my usual XSmall.

But we had to make one last stop that Edward didn't know about.

I'd definitely shifted in bra sizes, I could notice my boobs being bigger and spilling out of my usual 32B's or C's depending on the store. When we walked into Victoria's Secret he got a look in his eyes and I shoved his shoulder.

A very eager lady came up to me with a measuring tape asking me question after question but I told her that I'd rather grab a few bra's on my own and try them on to figure it out myself. I grabbed a few thin cotton 32C's and a couple everyday wear 32D's before going in the dressing room, shoving Edward out before trying them on. The 32C's were just barely making it, and I sighed and was trying to adjust myself to fit into them only to find myself getting frustrated and trying the D's.

Okay, it was nice to have big boobs I guessed, but I just didn't feel like this was my body, it was being invaded by my little bean. Edward knocked on the door after fifteen minutes and I opened it up and grabbed him inside quietly before locking it and sitting on the small bench with my head in my hands.

" Sweetheart, what's wrong?" he asked, looking at the bra's all hung around on the floor and hooks before kneeling before me.

" I just don't feel like me right now. I'm not calling myself fat, I just don't know what to do, everything feels just so uncomfortable and not what I'm used to."

He wrapped his arms around me, and I knew I was fucking lucky to have him. I didn't want to cry but it was just weird and foreign and not something in my comfort zone right now.

" Everything is changing, and I know it's getting hard to deal with because it feels like it's going fast; but I'm here for you, okay? I know I can't make these feelings go away but just know you're beautiful even if you do feel uncomfortable. Now, stand your sexy ass up, come here." he said, pulling me up with my hands and pressing us together.

" If it makes you feel better; I like your boobs." he teased, wrapping his arms around me as we looked at each other in the mirror.

" What fits best?"

" The fucking D's."

He grabbed the two I hadn't tried on and took the tags off the one I was wearing, which was just regular black, the other was white and then a dark blue one. He grabbed all my bags that he had been holding and grabbed one of the shirts from Hot Topic that we got and pulled the tags off before tossing it to me.

" Wear that, okay? You'll be more comfortable. Now lets go check out, okay?"

Edward purchased the bras for me and made sure the lady scanned the one I was wearing; she gave me an understanding look and smiled and then we were walking out with a pink striped bag in hand. I wrapped my arms around Edward and kissed his jaw.

" Thank you."

" You don't have to thank me, baby. I love you."

" Love you, too." I mumbled against his chest.

He smiled, " Let's go get some dinner."

" Great, I'm starved."

~\\~

Four and a Half Months

~\\~

The screen showed up immediately and I could hear the heartbeat echo in the room as if it were my own; the familiar noise always relieved me and made me feel like everything was safe and okay. That our baby was safe and okay.

Edward sat next to me, his head on my shoulder as usual as he saw our baby.

" There's your baby. Looks like about six inches tall…. Growing right in time which is very, very good. It looks like the hands are up by the face, maybe sucking their thumb." Dr. Jenner chuckled.

Edward held my hand and kissed my temple.

" Would you guys like to know the gender?"

" Yeah." Edward said almost immediately.

She moved down further a little bit, a few moments passed as she moved it around to get a look look before smiling and looking over at us.

" It looks like you are having a little baby girl."

When I looked over at Edward I could see silent tears falling down his face and he wiped them quickly.

" A little girl." he said brokenly into my shoulder.

I smiled and turned my head towards him, kissing the top of his head.

" I love you." I whispered.

He kissed me softly, " I love you, too. And our little baby girl."

Dr. Jenner smiled, " Everything looks so good so far, but as I said still our two week appointments, okay?"

My stomach had really grown the past month and a half, not too much but when I looked in the mirror; it was completely obvious that I was pregnant. I luckily wasn't getting puffy or anything, I looked like me, except for a little bump in the front.

It was the day before Christmas Eve, and I was almost exactly four and a half months along now, nearing five.

Dr. Jenner had told me that if I got to six and a half at least that the baby could make it outside of the womb with plenty of care if anything were to happen. She was being open and honest with us about everything. I'd been going to routine appointments and even still seeing Dr. Sawyer who said things seemed to be going good as well.

At home right now we had Esme, Carlisle and Alice as well as my Mom while Phil was currently travelling over Christmas, but might be able to make it. Since I couldn't fly to Forks, Christmas was coming to my house. Emmett was flying in tomorrow morning, and our house was full. We had the futon in the spare room with the back pulled completely down with extra blankets and comforters as well as pillows for Esme and Carlisle, and Alice was enjoying our comfy couch in the living room while my mom was in our study room on the pullout couch. We had to fit Emmett in somewhere, but as long as we had food that boy would be fucking happy on the floor.

Everybody was having fun, and Esme and Alice were having a blast going out shopping and taking cabs; they said it was part of the experience even though Edward and I offered the car to them.

I pulled my long sleeved flowy shirt over my stomach and sat up slowly after the gel was removed and Dr. Jenner gave me a hug and wished both Edward and I a Merry Christmas. As usual we made our appointment with the receptionist, Liz, and headed out back home. It was definitely cold here in New York, and snow covered the ground but no serious storms had occurred yet, which was good.

When we got home everybody was talking and relaxing around the house, and when I walked through the doors they all wanted to see the pictures of the baby right away. I sat down and the picture was being passed around to everybody, and Edward and I announced that I was having a girl.

Esme and my mom cried and held onto me tightly, I was sure that my mom was going to have a heart attack she was freaking out so much. Edward had a huge smile on his face as he looked at me and the photo.

" Oh, goodness. I'm so happy for the both of you."

" I just want to start planning." Alice said with a pout.

Edward wrapped his arm around her, " So do we, but we're just hanging in there still. Do you want something to drink, babe?"

" Oh, wait, before that we have a little surprise." Esme said, grabbing onto Edward before he went into the kitchen.

Just then coming down the stairs was Edward Sr, and I think Edward and I was both stunned into silence until he wrapped his arms around his son and then gently hugged me, looking down at my protruding stomach. For just a moment he rested his hand there and smiled.

" My goodness, I can't believe this. I'm so happy for you, son...and my daughter. I've been thinking about you every single day, Bella."

" I can't believe your here. When did you get in?"

" Just got dropped off a half hour ago. Your mom wanted to surprise you." he said, wrapping his arm around his son and holding him tight to his side.

" You look radiant, Bella. And you're having a girl?"

I nodded, " Yes, that's what our doctor said."

Edward came to me and wrapped me up in a hug, kissing my forehead.

" We just need Em and everything is perfect!" Alice exclaimed, vibrating with happiness.

" Thank you all so much for coming out here. I know it's hard with work." I said, looking at Edward Sr. and Carlisle, " And being away from ones you love." I said, looking at Alice and my mom, " But it means so much to me that you guys are here. Thank you." I said, trying not to tear up.

" We all love you, Bella. It's worth it. Now we just need to figure out how to fit all these people in this house."

" Well, I can cuddle with Bella, I mean, the three of us can fit in a king. Right, Bella?" Alice said.

I laughed, " Sure, whatever. I just want you all here."

Over the hour we were able to figure out all sleeping arrangements. Since we had a nice sized couch with the part that stuck out at the end, Alice said she'd sleep there and then Renee was going to be taking the other part of it. Edward's dad would take the pullout couch in our study room and Carlisle and Esme would stay put, and then Emmett we had said we could move the coffee table around and make him a makeshift bed. We had so many comforters and blankets that it would feel like a mattress. It was all stuffed in our closet upstairs so we took it all out and distributed blankets to everybody to make it even and left plenty for Emmett.

Edward made me a salad and some rice to eat for lunch as well as some decaf tea that I often drank. It helped my stomach so much, and it was okay to drink.

As we were in the kitchen they decided to set up Emmett's little bed on the floor and everybody was hanging out on the floor or the couch talking. Edward pulled me into his lap on the couch and rubbed my stomach softly, whispering into my ear.

" I want a little girl who looks just like you."

" I was thinking more along the lines of bronze curly hair and beautiful green eyes." I whispered back as he kissed my cheek.

" She's going to be beautiful?"

" You think so?" I asked, a lump in my throat to the second meaning of that question.

He wrapped his arms around me tighter, " We're going to make it Bella. There have been babies surviving four months early from the womb and you're going to be at five next month. We're having this baby."

I smiled and turned to kiss him.

" Aw, you guys are so cute." Alice said.

" Oh, just downright adorable." I said sarcastically before standing up.

" Need something?"

" I'm just going to put on some sweatpants or something."

He nodded and I went upstairs and changed into a pair of sweatpants, a pair of mine that fit and went low on my waist but they had a nice tie. Over it I put on one of Edward's shirts, because I still enjoyed wearing them and tossed my hair up; just then I heard a knock on the door and saw Alice.

" Hey." she said, plopping down on the bed as I brushed my hair out in the ponytail.

" Hey, everything alright?"

" Yeah, I just wanted to see how you are doing."

I shut the bathroom light off and sat down next to her.

" Everything feels weird but I'm okay. I'm kind of scared but Edward...He's been so great."

" He really seems to be in some type of 'daddy mode'. It's kind of weird for us." Alice laughed.

I nodded, " Yeah, I feel like I haven't even gotten there yet. Like I'm waiting for something to happen." I said, resting my hands on my stomach.

" Does she kick yet?"

" A little, mostly I can feel her move. I can't believe it's a girl, my mind is already starting to think it's becoming so real; I just don't want to lose her."

Alice smiled, " Bella, everything will be okay. We'll all make sure of that. She's a fighter in there, and the doctors say everything is going good. Trust in it, Bella. We've all been praying for you."

" Thank you, Alice. Really." I said, leaning forward to give her a hug.

" Well, someone grew a little bit." Alice teased.

I rolled my eyes, " Feel free to take a cup size from me."

" I wish! I'm stuck in barely 32B's!"

" Trust me, Alice. It's fucking annoying."

" I bet Edward doesn't mind."

I shoved her shoulder lightly, " That's gross, he's your brother."

" Just sayin'!"

" Everything alright up here, ladies?" Esme said, coming into the room with Renee behind her.

Alice nodded, " Yeah, we were just talking about Bella's huge new boobs."

I turned beat red and stood up, glaring down at Alice.

" I thought I was the only one to notice!" My mother exclaimed. " Sweetheart, even before you got pregnant I don't know where you got boobs, but be prepared to keep them. I was an A when I had you, and got up to B that never went away."

" Please tell me you're lying."

Esme laughed and rested her hand on my shoulder, " It's all part of it sweetheart. I went up to double D's with Edward; luckily I went down to a C which was my regular."

" This is so embarrassing."

" But I bet Edward doesn't mind." My mom said, wrapping her arm around my shoulder as Alice laid back on my bed and laughed while Esme shook her head back and forth.

" Mom, don't even go there."

She gave me a look, " Any guy would enjoy it, Bella."

" You guys are just weird."

" Well, I don't enjoy it. That's what counts."

" Are you telling me Edward and you haven't been active since you found out you were pregnant?"

Poor Esme.

" Mom! Not only is his mom in the room, as well as his sister, but I am not answering that!"

" It's okay, Bella. All of us are secretly curious, even mom!"

I groaned, " Not often, okay? The further I get along Dr. Jenner tells me to keep a lid on it. Once I get to at least six months she told me that we shouldn't have sex at all just in case."

" Damn, well, that sucks." Alice giggled.

" Okay, well, I'm going back downstairs. You guys feel free to talk about my boobs and sex life as you please."

They all laughed as I headed downstairs. Edward was waiting for me, arms open and I curled up against him and closed my eyes.

" Their trying to torture me."

" How?" he asked.

" Talking about my boobs and asking about our sex life."

Edward choked a bit at the end, " Isn't my mom up there?"

" I didn't give them details!"

He wrapped a blanket around my shoulders and kissed my forehead.

" I'm sorry, babe. Just rest."

I twisted the hem of my t-shirt and sighed, relaxing against him before drifting slowly into a short, blissful nap.

**Authors Note- Alright, so feel free to leave any thoughts. If you have any questions I WILL get to them in a review reply. Other than that thank you for reading!**


	59. The Good Life

**Authors Note- I know...I know...**

**Disclaimer- S. Meyer owns all things Twilight.**

**Chapter Song- The Good Life by: Three Days Grace**

~\\~

BPOV

~\\~

The moment we heard the funny knock on the door, beating in the sound of a Christmas tune, we all knew that Emmett had arrived; what we didn't expect was to see Jasper and Rosalie behind him. Alice squealed and ran off of the couch and jumped outside into Jaspers arms, snow falling from the sky, in her pajama's and no shoes on.

Emmett pulled Rosalie into the house and looked at me, almost as if he was looking for approval and I nodded.

I was over the high school drama and talk that Rosalie's spewed, as long as she knew to keep her mouth shut everything would be just fucking fine. When his eyes dropped to my stomach, obvious in the tank top I wore, he ran over to me and lifted me up into his arms.

" Holy shit, Bells! Look at you."

Edward came over with wide eyes, " Put her down, Emmett. She can't be jostled around like that, it's not safe."

Immediately Emmett set me down but I leaned forward and gave him a hug.

" How far along are you?!"

" It'll be five months mid January." I told him while Rosalie looked at me weirdly from the side.

Emmett went and wrapped his arm around her before smiling at me. Jasper carried Alice into the house and shut the door, stomping his feet on the matt before taking his shoes off and setting Alice down. He came towards me with a small smile.

" I hope it's alright that I'm here."

" Of course, the more the merrier. I just don't know where to put all of you!"

" Don't worry about it.

He surprised me by giving me a light hug and looking at my stomach.

" Congratulations to the both of you. I hope everything is going to go well; I wish the best."

" Thank you, Jasper." Edward said respectively.

I leaned over and looked at Rosalie, " Hello, Rosalie. How have you been?"

" Isabella." she regarded, " And I've been fine." she stated, not asking how I was in return.

Edward wrapped his arms around me and kissed my forehead.

" Well, you all got to figure out sleeping arrangements. My mom and Carlisle got the spare bedroom, and my dad has the pullout in our study, Alice and Bella's mom are on the couch and we were putting Emmett in the floor in the living room."

Emmett waggled his eyes, " I can shack it up with your dad, what do ya say Mr. Edward Sr?"

Edward's dad rolled his eyes at Emmett, " No."

" Rose and I can take the floor together, there's enough room. And we'll squeeze Jaspy in between us; he loves to snuggle." Emmett said while Jasper wrinkled his nose.

" We'll work it all out." I said.

Everybody put their bags near the entertainment center, and Emmett, Rosalie and Jasper took out the wrapped presents from their bag to put under the tree Edward and I had put up. We'd gotten a fake tree, with colorful lights and plenty of ornaments that Zoey loved to tap and play with.

And speaking of, the cat herself bounded down the steps to see what all the commotion was, and she paused with big eyes at Emmett before drawing her ears back and hissing loudly at Rosalie, growling and digging her paws into the floor. Rosalie looked taken back, moving closer to Emmett.

" What the hell?"

" Zoey, knock it off." I snapped.

She growled louder and Edward grabbed her from behind and picked her up, claws still out to attack, but calming when she saw it was Edward, purring into his shoulder.

" Stop being a little bitch." he chuckled and tossed her on the couch.

" Well, we have some leftover breakfast you guys must be hungry!" Esme exclaimed.

Jasper, Emmett and Rosalie had breakfast and everybody spread around the downstairs, in the kitchen, living room, at the table or just hanging out anywhere else.

I went upstairs and took a short shower and changed into a pair of my skinny jeans and a red long sleeve shirt that clung to my chest but flowed out. I curled my hair, which was feeling so much silkier lately and put a little makeup on as well as concealer underneath my eyes.

" Hey, baby...You look gorgeous." he murmured, pulling me into his arms and holding me close, kissing my lips softly.

" Thank you, and so do you." I said, appraising his dark jeans, white button up and dark sweater over it.

He rested his hands on my stomach and just then I felt a tiny little kick from the baby where his hand was and he smiled.

" Merry Christmas Eve, my sweet little Angel." he whispered, kneeling in front of me and lifting my shirt to kiss my bare stomach. I was so glad I wasn't getting horrid stretch marks, I still had some time but I was putting lotion on my stomach constantly to prevent it.

" I love you." he said before pulling my shirt down and standing up.

" And I love you." his eyes sparkled and his lips touched mine again, this time more deep and sensual. He was really turning me on and I got the sudden urge to jump on top of him. I started moving towards the bed and he paused and pulled away, chuckling.

" What are you intentions?"

" To get you the fuck out of your clothes. Now." I said, determined as I grabbed the buckle of his belt.

" As much as I would love to, we have family downstairs, Bella."

My hormones were raging crazily, and I couldn't help but feel like I was going insane with lust for him.

" I don't care."

" I promise when we're alone I'll take good care of you."

" Edward, I need you now." I said, sounding like a kid who wanted a cookie before dinner.

He palmed my ass and gave me a quick kiss, " I need you, too. But we have to wait. When did you become so insatiable?"

" My hormones are everywhere, Edward. I just need you." I said, pulling my lips to his and moving my hand slowly down his chest. He stopped it before it got lower and kissed my hand before grabbing it and leading me downstairs.

" Seriously?"

" Bella, I'm not doing anything with you right now." he said.

I groaned and pulled him close to me, " That's not fair."

" What's not fair is you turning me on when we're supposed to be downstairs." he growled, pressing me against the wall in the hallway.

My hand scratched up and down his back and just as the moment was there, it was gone when someone started running up the stairs. It was Alice, and she gave us a look and crossed her arms over her chest.

" What're you too doing up here?"

" Doing whatever it is married people are allowed to do, Alice." Edward said, pulling me past her and down the stairs. I laughed as she glared at us, when we got downstairs I sat down on the couch near my mom and rested my hand on my stomach lightly, rubbing absently.

" Were you and Edward talking about names last night?"

I gave my mom and even smile, " No...not really. We're still trying not to get so...attached but it's so hard when I can feel her kicking and when Edward talks to her and touches my stomach. If I lost her I don't know what I would do. I love her too much."

" You can't detach yourself from something that's a part of you, sweetheart. Of course you love her. You just need to have hope that everything will be okay, just like everybody around you. You'll make it through this, sweetie. You're so strong." she assured me, wrapping her arm around me and holding me close. I breathed in her familiar 'mom' smell and she kissed my temple.

" Don't worry yourself. I don't want you and Edward living everyday wondering if you might lose the baby. Surround this baby with love and family, give her everything you can."

" You're right."

She smiled, " And I know that your father has all of your baby furniture in the attic. Maybe you could give him a call and have it sent here in a couple months."

" Yeah, I can sense the conversation. Hey, Charlie, I'm pregnant and I was wondering if I could have the furniture from when I was a baby sent here. No way."

" No way, what?" Edward asked, sitting on the floor in front of where I sat on the couch. I adjusted my legs around him and rested my hands on his shoulders.

" No way am I calling my father to ask for the furniture I had when I was a baby."

Edward made a look and I rubbed my hands over his shoulders, pushing and massaging the tight muscles as he moaned quietly. " That feels really good."

Renee laughed, " You men. So simple to please."

He tilted his head back to rest on the couch, looking up at me. I leaned down and gave him a quick kiss before continuing my ministrations for a few minutes until he was curled up on the other side of me on the couch, his head in my lap as I ran my fingers through his hair. My mom and Esme as well as a few others were in the kitchen; wanting to make little finger foods to eat and then tomorrow we were going out to dinner, switching up the tradition a bit for the Cullen's. Edward was practically asleep in my lap, a blanket tossed over him while Rosalie, Emmett, and Jasper watched a movie with us in the living room. Emmett picked it and I believed it was Dawn of the Dead or something. Very not Christmas of him.

" Tired, babe?"

Edward nodded and turned his head the other way, facing my stomach and placing a small kiss there before nuzzling his face there.

" Didn't sleep too much. You've been moving a lot in your sleep, talking a lot more."

" I'm sorry." I whispered.

" It's fine. You almost fell off the bed but I was able to grab onto you." he chuckled lightly.

For about an hour and a half Edward got a nice nap, his head laying in my lap the entire time and he barely even moved. I was able to sneak a few snacks that Esme had brought me. Eventually the house was getting rowdy and he was waking up very irritated.

" You should go upstairs." I said, rubbing his back over the blanket he was wrapped up in.

" You're too warm and comfy."

" Well, I'm kind of sleepy, too, so how about we sneak away for two hours and take a nice nap." I suggested, being honest because I did feel tired and I usually took a nap during the days now.

He nodded and slowly stood up, rubbing tired eyes and yawning as he stood, lifting me up with him.

" Hey, Bella and I are going to head upstairs to take a nap. Help yourself to anything and make sure Emmett doesn't break anything." Edward said to Esme.

" Okay, you both get some rest. You look tired, Bella."

I took a little crescent wrapped hotdog upstairs with me and ate it in two bites before collapsing in bed in my jeans. Before I could move Edward was pealing them off of me and tossing leggings in my direction as well as a long t-shirt. I put it on and snuggled underneath the sheets with Edward next to me, arms wrapped around me.

He was such a fucking cuddler that it was adorable.

Edward buried his face in my chest as I rested my chin above his head.

" Comfy?" I asked.

He nuzzled my boobs, " Mhm."

I was sleeping within second afterwards.

~\\~

" Bella! Bella, baby, wake up!"

I frantically sat up, completely taken by surprised by the way Edward had woken me up. I sat up and my hand through my hair and looked over at his panicked face.

" What's wrong?"

" Your bleeding."

I looked down and saw a stain of blood on the sheets. My eyes flashed back to the pool of blood months back and my mind drifted before I snapped back and saw that it wasn't anything big, but noticeable. I got out of bed and went to the bathroom.

" We have to get to the hospital, Bella. Now."

" Get me a pair of underwear and sweatpants."

" Bella, we need to go! Now! I already have my dad heating the car up."

My heart raced in my chest, " Sometimes bleeding can happen, Edward. If...If I miscarried I think there would be more, now can you please do as I say?"

I didn't feel any cramping in my stomach, but when I went to the bathroom I was spotting so when Edward came in with underwear and a pair of sweatpants I cleaned up and searched for the package of pads that I never used, but had from when I had miscarried in the summer. I got myself ready and grabbed my purse while Edward led me downstairs. Everybody looked panicked but I took a deep breath. My mom sat in the passenger seat and Edward got in the back with me as we got to the hospital.

They were insanely busy, but when we walked up to the front desk and told them what was going on they immediately were admitting me and were taking me into a room quickly and getting an ultra sound tech down as well as taking blood and changing me into a gown.

Everything was happening very quickly, and Edward helped me into a gown. I didn't feel like I was bleeding heavily and I had a nurse asking me questions while a doctor wrote it down. I asked them if Dr. Sawyer was in but his shift had just ended so I had a nice lady who looked pretty young, Dr. Carter who was filling in the questions that the nurse asked me such as how far along, had I been bleeding any days prior and the Dr. Carter went through my other files to see my previous miscarriage and the accident as per usual.

They left after a few minutes and said the ultra sound tech would be in, and they already sticked me with an IV for fluids and the nurse set up a heart monitor for me and the baby; which they said was looking normal but they were still checking.

I laid my head back and Edward held my hand, " I'm so sorry, baby."

" Why are you apologizing?"

" I hate seeing you go through this."

He was watching the heart monitor, and Edward's dad was sitting out in a waiting room, my mom was in the room with me sitting in a chair looking worried but giving me reassuring glances every few moments.

I sighed, " Edward, I hope she's okay."

Edward sat on the edge of the bed and rested his hand on my stomach.

" It's going to be alright." he murmured.

I felt a small kick in my side and pressed my hand there.

My thoughts were running rampid and I was trying to stay calm because the doctor had told me that everything seemed alright and that some bleeding was normal for some women, but in my case she had wanted to check everything to be safe due to my past records. Edward reassured me, kissing my forehead and squeezing my hand, trying not to show his own panic to make me go off the deep end right now.

The ultra sound tech had entered to room twenty minutes later and everybody was a little more relieved. She introduced herself as Sam, and said she was going to take a look. She dragged up the hospital blanket as she lifted my gown so I wouldn't be exposed and put the gel on my stomach, but the feeling of it being so cold caused a shiver to run through my body. When she started to move around to look around I could see my little baby on the monitor.

She was checking to see the umbilical cord, making sure it wasn't wrapped around the neck, as well as making sure everything was intact. The placenta didn't detach and I could hear her heartbeat going strong, echoing in the room.

" Well, Bella, everything seems to be looking alright. Your baby is moving, and active and seemingly very, very healthy. The doctor will be in shortly to talk to you. Do you have any questions?"

" Everything looks perfect?" Edward asked.

She smiled, " Yes, everything looks great."

When she left Edward let out a breath he was holding in, as did my mom and myself.

" Thank god."

No sooner did Dr. Carter come in and smile at me.

" Well, Bella; I have some news from your blood tests and from when the nurse checked everything out and it appears that you have a yeast infection, which is very common in pregnant woman; but otherwise you are perfectly healthy. Have you noticed any kind of discharge or any pain or itching of your genital area? Or any pain during sex?"

Fucking. Embarrassing.

My mom slyly walked out of the room with a smile, understanding.

" Uhm...I noticed when I went to the bathroom sometimes something white would come out, but I didn't really think much of it. Sometimes I feel a little sore but no itching or pain during sex."

She nodded, " We will prescribe you a cream to help get rid of the infection. You will have to insert the cream inside of you; preferably at night. This infection will not hurt or affect the baby at all as long as it heals. If you continue to get them then the baby could have it passed on during birth in his or her mouth, which is just white patches on the roof and the sides of the mouth but they are very easily treatable and not harmful to the baby; this is something known as thrush."

" Okay."

" After you apply the cream for the week I recommend going to see your OB-GYN, and she'll probably want a follow up after you both tell her about tonight. To prevent getting any more yeast infections I will recommend that if you work out and break a sweat that you clean yourself immediately, but since you are inactive due to your situation I'm sure that won't apply unless you are sexually active. At night time you can try sleeping without underwear for more circulation especially if you wear a night gown or something similar. I would definitely avoid baths and perfumed soaps, and I would get detergent for laundry that isn't scented for your undergarments. As well as try to avoid wearing tight pants and wear underwear that is more breathable cotton. These will help with prevention."

" Thank you so much, Doctor." Edward said.

I was sure he loved the woman.

She smiled, " Of course. Now do you still feel any bleeding, Bella?"

" Just small spotting." I said.

" That's normal and should go away within the next few days, but I will go write out the prescription for the cream, all directions are on the box just in case and I'll have the nurse discharge you. If this happens again more heavily I suggest that you come to the ER immediately. But other than that you are perfectly healthy as is you baby."

" Thank you very much, Dr. Carter."

She smiled and left the room. Edward immediately wrapped his arms around me and held me closely.

" Thank you, god. I love you, and I love you." he said, kissing my lips and then my stomach.

I took a deep breath and saw my mom come back in the room.

" Everything okay?"

" Yeah, mom. Everything is great. Just a prescription and I can leave."

The nurse came in and took my IV out, as well as got rid of the heart monitor for me and the baby, turning it off and detaching me from all the cords. She put a bandage on my hand from the IV and wished me luck as she left us with papers and what not.

Soon the doctor came in with the prescription and just as the nurse did, wished me luck. While I got myself dressed Edward called Dr. Jenner and talked to her for a good ten minutes before coming back into the room just as I was grabbing my purse tiredly.

" I set up an appointment for Friday to see Dr. Jenner at 12:30; she said that she was so glad to hear everything was okay with you."

I nodded and Edward wrapped his arm around me as we headed out. Edward Sr. gave me a big hug when he saw me and then we headed to the car. He pulled it up to the front and we all got in. Edward called his mom to let her know everything was okay, just a small infection but it wouldn't hurt the baby and I was just fine. The spotting and bleeding from before was normal and just the easy, non graphic details.

When we got back, Esme wouldn't let me go and she kissed my forehead multiple times. Alice told me not to scare her like that again and Emmett said if I ever freaked him the fuck out like that that he'd kill my cat; who seemingly hated him. Edward took me upstairs to rest and I just wanted to fucking sleep, the rush of everything was emotionally and mentally exhausting. He brought me crackers and sprite and I pulled on his shirt to lay next to me. Someone had cleaned up the sheets and I was thankful for that, it was the kindest gesture and I knew it had to be Esme and Alice. They were too good to me.

" Please hold me." I sighed.

He grabbed onto me and hugged me closely, rubbing my stomach gently on the side.

" God, Bella; I thought..." he choked out.

" I'm okay, everything is okay. She's okay." I whispered

" I love you two so much."

I wrapped my arms around him tightly and he kissed every place exposed to him.

" You need to rest, angel."

" Stay with me; don't leave."

" I'm not going anywhere, just sleep for me."

He kissed my forehead and I buried my head in his chest and wrapped myself around him.

When I awoke later on everybody was already asleep. Edward was passed out next to me and the room was mostly dark except for the lamp on his side that he had dimmed. I sat up and quietly walked downstairs as my stomach growled. I rested my hand there and looked to my right. On the floor in front of the couch I saw Rosalie and Emmett curled up and asleep, and near the tree Alice and Jasper made their own little bed and were asleep wrapped around each other as well as my mother slept peacefully on the couch.

I went into the kitchen and saw food that Esme and my mom made with plastic wrap around it to keep it fresh. There were also things in the fridge. My stomach growled again and I grabbed a bottle of water and sipped on it as I searched for something good to eat. I had some stuffed mushrooms and then dug in the fridge to make a roast beef and mustard sandwich on rye; trying my best to be quiet. My stomach was satisfied when I was finished and I took another long drink of water. As I was putting the bread away I turned around and saw Rosalie standing in the kitchen.

Fucking weird.

" Are you feeling okay?"

My inner bitch growled.

" I have respect for you because you are with Emmett, but...Why in the hell do you care?" I asked quietly.

" Maybe because I have some sense of sympathy for you for some stupid reason." she bit back.

" Well, I don't know why. Don't waste your time."

I wanted to walk out of the room but she stopped me.

" Why do you have to be such a bitch, I'm trying to be nice and you just throw it in my face. You can't just get over high school and junior high, Bella? Really?" she said, sounding frustrated.

What the fuck?!

" Why can't I get over it?! Rosalie, all I did was stay out of your way to be nice until finally you took it too far when you cornered me with a knife in a bathroom. Hell, when I first started dating Edward I tried to be nice to you around the family but all you did was throw out comments that I was a dyke and Edward deserved better. Excuse me if that made me run out of reasons to play nice."

After that she was silent, and when she sighed and looked up I could see her blue eyes softened.

" You're right. I was a bitch to you for absolutely no reason then."

" What reasons did I give you in high school, huh?"

" It's stupid. I just...I'm sorry for how I treated you."

" Don't just apologize, what is it?"

She gripped the counter top, " I cornered you in the bathroom that one day at school because I saw your friend Jessica making out with the guy I liked...And it's stupid and I went for you because you were an easy target. I don't even remember his name which is why I said it's stupid. In high school I only taunted you because of your parents' divorce and I just thought since I always taunted you I could keep going with it for the fun, and then during the middle of Sophomore year you started to hang out with James Graham, and he was best friends with Sam Taite, remember?"

I knew Sam somewhat. Or maybe I should say when I was sixteen I knew him on a more sexual levels during James' parties. Rosalie and Lauren used to go to them for as long as I remembered until I guess she just stopped. I never really cared as to why, but it was just abrupt. Then I lived my life partying, smoking and hooking up with guys without going all the way. I wasn't a complete slut, but I wasn't innocent.

" Yeah, I remember him."

" We had been dating for three months until I found you blowing him at James' party out by the side of the house."

My eyes widened and I felt embarrassed. The way she put it out there so blatantly took me off guard, and to be perfectly honest thinking about my past besides Edward made me feel kind of sick.

" Oh."

" I'd liked him since freshmen year and he was finally into me and then when I found you guys all over each other and...you all over him I got pissed and I guess held it again you even when I met Emmett because I thought you did it to spite me.. I don't know how to explain...It was pathetic and petty and I know it. The way I've treated you is wretched, and when I found about the miscarriage during the summer I felt like a bitch for what I said. I know that I said a lot of shit about your relationship with Edward and made jokes about you guys being emo stoners, and yeah; I meant it then but it was stupid. I judged what I saw on the outside."

" Rosalie, I'm really sorry for that...I'm not proud of what I did during those years of my life and I probably hurt other girls along the way, and even though you treated me like shit before, what I did was downright wrong. But I want you to know that I didn't know you were with him whether you believe what I say or not...Look, I'm over everything else, I'm married, I'm graduating in a year and I have a baby to worry about right now."

She nodded, " I know, and that's why I wanted to apologize. I know we won't ever be best friends, but at least be civil in the same room. I've talked to Emmett a lot and...he loves you like a little sister and I know it makes it weird for him sometimes with the way I act. So can we call a truce?"

" Yeah." I said.

She reached her hand out, " I'm sorry for being a bitch to you, making threats and calling you an emo stoner to sum it all up."

" I'm sorry for telling Emmett that your boobs are fake." I stated, shaking her hand.

And then we were laughing quietly in the kitchen. In the middle of it all Edward appeared around the corner, clothes rumpled and hair a total mess. He looked between Rosalie and I before settling his eyes on me.

" Uh, am I still fucking sleeping?"

" No. Bella and I just called a truce. And I forgive you for that, Bella. Even though Em still makes jokes about it to me."

Edward looked at me like I was crazy, " Are you feeling okay, love?" he asked.

" Shut up, yes. We're just over the fucking high school shit and moving on. Now, uh, Edward move on too."

" Hilarious." he deadpanned.

I looked at him and sighed, " Look, even before you we both did shit to each other, mine more unintentional than hers but I'm not a kid anymore, and no; Rosalie isn't going to be my future bestie or shit like that, but we're cool. She's sorry for the shit she said about us, so can we just go back to sleep and move on?"

" Whatever." he mumbled, grabbing water from the fridge and gulping it.

" I'm going to go back to bed before Emmett wakes up, and thanks for not freaking out when I showed up with him. He practically got on his knees and begged me."

" It's fine, Rosalie. I'm just glad we can just get over all the shit in the past. Goodnight."

" Night."

She walked out of the room and Edward put his hand on my forehead, a weird look on his face and taking another pull of his water.

" You sure you're okay?"

" Yes."

He wrapped his arm around me, " How about the baby?"

" I don't think I'm bleeding anymore, but I have to change out of these clothes."

" Night gowns, no underwear." he whispered suggestively.

I rolled my eyes and started to head upstairs with a full stomach and my water. Edward followed after me and I went to the washroom. I wasn't bleeding, but I used panty liners and put on light underwear as the doctor suggested. I slipped on one of my nighties, they were ones I wore before I was pregnant, but ones Alice had gotten for my honeymoon; luckily my boobs didn't completely fall out of it, and they flowed nicely over my stomach and to mid thigh. I saw Edward laying in bed just in his briefs when I got out of the bathroom and his eyes went to me, hungry and wanting; but I knew he wouldn't do anything.

" Hello, sexy." he said as I got into bed, climbing across the bed on my hands and knees towards him.

" Hi." I said, laying next to him. His arm wrapped around me to rest on my stomach, lightly rubbing.

His eyes were locked on my stomach, and I could see the love in his eyes, so warm and full of care. It made me feel full of pure love for him.

" You're going to be the best dad." I whispered to him, kissing his cheek.

Edward smiled up at me, " You think so?"

" I know so."

" Well, you're going to be a wonderful mother."

I leaned up and wrapped my arms around his neck, giving him a tender kiss. When I pulled away he smiled at me, and I kissed him once more before resting my head on his chest.

" Why'd you stop?" he asked, rolling me onto my back carefully and kissing my lips smoothly.

My neck laid at an awkward angle so I turned it to the side and enjoyed the feeling of his soft, pliant lips against mine; moving together so perfectly. He wrapped one of his arms around my neck and I felt him press close to me, my stomach in the way a bit making me laugh quietly.

" I think someone is coming between us." he whispered, trailing kisses down my neck and moving down over my collarbone, the middle of my chest and down to my stomach; placing a kiss right in the center of my baby bump.

" I love you." he whispered, running his hands over my stomach.

My fingers ran thought his hair before he leaned back up to me and kissed me. I couldn't get enough of his lips on mine; it was something I knew I'd never tire of. The sparks still flew around us as if it were the first time he kissed me all those years ago in high school.

I rolled onto my side and he followed my movement; his tongue wrapping around mine and exploring my mouth, never stopping. My hand moved up the side of his abdomen before sliding down to slip my hand over his ass.

He moaned quietly into my mouth and ran his hand up my leg, bringing my small nightgown with it and baring my skin to him.

" So soft." he whispered against my mouth, sliding his hands over my back.

I scratched my hands over his back, raking my nails on his skin like I knew he loved. He kissed the corner of my mouth and brought my bottom lip between both of his; sucking gently before releasing. I tilted my head back and enjoyed the feeling of his lips on my neck.

" You're driving me insane." he moaned, " Making me want you when I can't have you."

When he pulled away, he rested his head on the tops of my breasts, kissing where my heart was placed.

" I love _you_."

" I love you, too." I replied, wrapping my body around his as much as I could.

His fingers wrapped in my hair and massaged the back of my head. The feeling of it was bringing me to the brink of sleep.

" Rest, my beautiful girls." was the last thing I heard him say before I fell asleep.

**Authors Note- I'll not be THIS late next time I promise!**


	60. Miracle

**Authors Note- Hello everybody, this is the latest writing/installment! I hope you're excited to read more!**

**Disclaimer- S. Meyer owns all things Twilight.**

**Chapter Song- Miracle by: Paramore**

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BPOV

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Christmas with the Cullen's, as well as the others, had been something else to be perfectly honest. I awoke to the sound of many voices talking, the sound, and delicious smell, of breakfast being made and Emmett sitting by our bedroom door to see if we were awake.

Edward curled up against my back with his head burrowed into my neck. His arm was wrapped around my waist, and I felt his lips against my skin, warm and soft.

" Shh." he whispered.

I couldn't help but giggle. We'd been quiet for too long.

" You are awake! I knew it you fucking fakers!"

I turned over in Edward's arms and buried my head in his chest; hoping to block out Emmett's booming voice.

" Go the fuck away." Edward whined.

" I want to open presents!"

" My house my rules. Leave us alone until 10."

" That's a whole sixty minutes!" he groaned.

Edward laughed, " Congrats, Em, you know how many minutes are in an hour. Now go; I had plans this morning with my wife."

" To what? Lay in bed and talk about finances?"

" I was thinking more along the lines of hot sex, it's finally my morning to be on top, close to door behind you please and maybe lock it." Edward said.

" Ugh! Ew fucking gross, Edward! Ugh, I'm getting mental images, I fucking hate you man."

The door slammed and I giggled against Edward's chest, wrapping my arms around him.

" I was being serious you know."

I bit into the spot between his shoulder and neck and he rolled on top of me and grabbed the hem of my nightie. He literally ripped it off of me and he gazed down at my exposed skin before his hands were grabbing and touching.

My crazy insane hormones wanted to rip his underwear off and let him have all of me, but the logical person inside me knew that our family was downstairs and that was kind of weird…and wrong. My hands had a mind of their own as they slipped underneath his boxers to squeeze his ass.

" Baby, as good as this feels I can't...Fuck...We can't have sex with everybody in the house."

He groaned loudly, continuing to suck on my collarbone.

" This isn't fair, your messing with my hormones. I'm not only young, but I'm pregnant and it's not fair. You're taking advantage of me." I sighed, my fingers in his hair.

Edward rolled us on our sides and ran his hand down my body, " You're just so beautiful."

" I'm fucking huge." I said, rolling over and getting out of bed. I put on one of Edward's t-shirt and a pair of long flannel pants with clean socks.

I felt his arms come up behind me, and I rested against his chest.

" You aren't huge. You're insane." he whispered, kissing the side of my neck.

" And you're naked." I laughed, feeling a certain part of his anatomy pressed against my back.

I reached into his drawer and pulled out a t-shirt, boxers and pajama pants, turning around to press them against his chest. He put his hands on either side of me, pressing into the dresser before leaning forward and kissing me. I kissed him back for just a moment, gently biting his bottom lip before pulling away.

" Get dressed." I whispered, nipping his jaw before heading for the bathroom.

I took my vitamins, brushed my teeth and tossed my hair up in a ponytail. When I went into the bedroom Edward was dressed but laying in bed all curled up in the covers. I laughed and went over to him, grabbing his hands.

" Let's go downstairs, come on." I said.

" Sleep." he whined.

" Well, I'm going downstairs. My stomach is telling me it's time for food."

He groaned as he got up and we made our way downstairs. Emmett averted his eyes away from us as Edward winked at him. It was creepy but so fucking hilarious.

" Sweetheart, we made breakfast come eat while it's still hot." my mom said, ushering me into the kitchen to sit down. Edward followed me, sitting down as plates were set in front of us.

" Emmett, do you feel sick, honey? Your face is almost green?" Esme said.

I covered my hand with my mouth and looked over at Edward who was trying not to laugh.

" I'm fine, mom." Emmett said, sounding clearly off.

" Obviously you aren't, how about you sit down."

Something seriously seemed to have gotten into Edward, or seemed to burst out of him because he started laughing louder than I had ever hear him laugh before and I covered my face with my hands.

" Emmett came upstairs to see if Bella and I were awake and I told him to give us an hour because this morning was mine to be on top; okay? I scarred him for life, now can we move on. Merry Christmas!"

I blushed, fucking blushed like a little school girl.

Esme slapped Edward on the back of the head, as did his father with the newspaper.

" Edward Anthony! Do you have any manners, or any sense of keeping certain things to yourself?"

" Oh my god, it was a fucking joke! Do you really think for one Bella and I have a schedule of sex positions per morning? And second, if we did, would I tell Emmett about it?"

" Edward, please shut the hell up." I snapped at him.

If he thought he was getting any in the next few weeks he was so wrong.

" Sweetheart, I was ju-"

" Shut up! And if you think you are going to be getting any action for the next couple of months you are sorely mistaken!"

I grabbed my plate and went into the living room while a resounding " Ouch" sounded in the kitchen as I sat down on the couch to watch A Christmas Story.

Alice came to sit next to me, giggling quietly into her hand.

" The look on his face is priceless." she whispered.

" Good!"

When I finished up with breakfast Esme took my plate from me and I thanked her, and then everybody was gathering around to open up gifts. Edward sat beside me and I pleasantly ignored him, even though he was sitting so close he was in my lap and he'd apologized a million times.

" Please, I don't want you to be upset at me." he whispered and then rested his hand on my stomach.

" Then shut your mouth about our sex life."

" Baby, I was just telling them what I told Emmett."

" Still!" I said shrilly.

He sighed and leaned forward, turning my face towards his before kissing me softly.

" I love you."

" Hey, lovebirds. A gift coming your way."

A package hit Edward in the side of the face and he grabbed it with a glare, it was from his mom and Carlisle and he set it in his lap.

" I love you, too." I said to him, leaning into him because to be perfectly fucking honest, I couldn't stay mad at this man, no matter how irritating or big-mouthed he could be.

The rest of the gifts were spanned out for everybody before our living room became a mess of wrapping paper. It was insane; but everybody was so happy with their gifts that it was worth the mess of everything. Esme had gotten me some nice maternity tops, and they were fucking awesome because they were exactly my style. One was a more fitted top and it was a long sleeved black lace shirt with a black shirt underneath, so the lace was an overlay. She also got me a long sleeved one that was tunic styled with little skulls all over it.

Honestly, it was sweet that she didn't try to buy me pink flowy tops with butterflies and shit all over it. She understood what I liked and went with it, which I respected.

But then Emmett got me a shirt that had an arrow pointing down saying 'Bun in the oven', and there was no fucking way I was going to wear that but it was funny to look at. All the gifts were from him and Rosalie together, and he also got me a few other cool things, some movies, cd's and other randoms that I would expect from Emmett, such as another new piercing, but this one was for my tongue, and on the front part it had a steak on it, and then a silver ball on the bottom.

" It's like you're eating all the time." he stated.

I couldn't help but laugh at his antics.

Esme and Carlisle had also gotten Edward some clothes as well, and some new hoodies that he desperately needed. He also got the new iPad from them as well which he was having an amazing time with. I had gotten him the new iPhone that he had been salivating over but refused to buy himself, and got him a few other little things such as a few books on his wish lists and new composition books.

Then came the big gift that everybody had pitched in to get for him. Carlisle, Edward Sr, Esme, Emmett, Alice and I. When I handed him the envelope he looked confused, but when he read the paper on the delivery for his brand new piano he almost had a stroke. He literally got up and hugged everybody in the room before lifting me up into his lap.

" Your always worried about staying late in the composition rooms and leaving me here alone at night because I don't have classes, so...I thought you might light this. We can put it in the spare room and move the futon and other things around in there to make it however you want and paint the walls in there so it can be your little room."

" What about the baby?"

" Edward, our living room is open enough for us to put our bookcase down here, and we can get rid of one of the desks and put our things together. If...If our baby gets here then everything will work out."

" She will get here." he whispered, leaning forward to kiss me.

I smiled and leaned my head against his shoulder.

" Do you like it?"

" I love it. Thank you, everyone." Edward said with a smile.

He got up from the couch and grabbed a gift that had been in the tree and it was a small box from Tiffany, and I knew it had to be a charm. I'd already opened a few things from him, including a Nook color which was basically like an iPad but more for books and I could go online with it and I was so excited to set it up and play with it.

When he handed me the little box I opened it up and saw a little gold teddy bear charm with pink enamel on its stomach in the shape of a little heart. I looked up at him with tears in my eyes.

" Look, I know we're going day by day, but this little girl already means the world to me and no matter what I just always want you to have this to remember. I had it enameled with the pink heart especially for you."

" I love it, Edward. Thank you, baby." I said, leaning forward to kiss him before holding my wrist out. He attached the charm for me to the bracelet that I wore everyday and lifted my hand to place a kiss on the top of my hand.

" You're welcome." he whispered, kissing my lips softly.

I curled up against his side as everybody looked around and messed with their gifts. Alice was fawning over her new designer bag Jasper got her, Rosalie over the necklace Emmett got her while Edward's dad was surprised to see that we'd gotten him a brand new pure wood brief case and brass clasps as well as a few other things Edward picked out for him. My mom loved the Pandora bracelet that I got her, and I told her that Phil could now get her charms and so could I, and Edward had picked out the charm to get for her which was a little present with a red ribbon.

Everybody was essentially happy with their gifts, and although Christmas wasn't about the gifts it was still nice to give the gifts to everybody and see everybody enjoy them and be thankful. I grabbed one of Edward's new hoodies and slipped it on while he laughed.

" What, just trying it out." I said as he wrapped his arms around me and buried his face in my neck.

" You can wear any of this anytime you want." Edward replied, continuing to laugh.

" Well, maybe I should have signed everything to Bella and Edward."

Edward grabbed the long sleeved lace maternity top. " I would took damn sexy in this."

Everyone laughed and I shook my head, " No, Edward, just no."

" She'll let me try it on later." he claimed, setting it down and sprawling out on the couch next to me.

Carlisle brought in a black bag and everybody tossed out all of their garbage, things in packages and what not to clean up the living room, and Esme apologized for the mess but I told everybody not to worry and just put their shit where they wanted. Honestly, I didn't care.

" You're beautiful." his quiet whispers made me smile, and his hand on my stomach comforted me. I couldn't feel the little one moving around too much, so I was sure she was sleeping because she was moving active this morning when I got up. Apparently all the Christmas fun tired her out, too.

He pulled a blanket up around me and I snuggled into it, my eyes on the TV, and my pretty new charm. His left hand moved up towards my wrist, and I lifted his hand and kissed over his wedding band.

" Thank you for all my gifts."

" You don't have to thank me, it's my job to spoil you."

I smiled and hugged his arm to my chest. He secretly copped a feel and I slapped his hand away playfully. He nipped lightly at my ears, tugging at my piercings before kissing underneath my ear.

" I have got to go out now and spend this gift card at to Sax! Rebecca Minkoff just came out with the most adorable convertible clutch and I just have to get it! Come on Jazz we have to get dressed!" Alice squealed.

Edward knew that exact way to Alice's heart, and she was hopping up and down and squealing. Rosalie wanted to tag along with her because Esme and Carlisle had gotten her a gift card to Brandy Melville's so she and Emmett were going to tag along as well. Then somehow it ended up that Esme and Carlisle were going to head out shopping because Esme wanted to go with Alice, and Carlisle hinted at a present he wanted to get her. So in the end by the time everybody was ready with only two showers in the place it was Edward Sr, Edward and I left at the house.

We cleaned up a little bit, well, Edward forced me to lay down while he cleaned up a little and then sat down on the couch while Edward's dad sat on the opposite side of the couch, legs stretched out in front of him.

" So, dad, not interested in scouring Times Square?"

" Son, I'm not crazy."

Edward chuckled and wrapped his arms tighter around me.

" How's everything back home?"

" Good, really busy and just closed up a pretty big case. A nasty divorce, so many kids involved I can't stand it when the parents can't think of them before themselves."

Edward nodded, " I couldn't stand dealing with that shit. I'd tell them to figure it out and walk out of the room."

" And that is why you are a music major, kid." Edward Sr. said with a laugh, " So how is online schooling going for you Bella?"

I shrugged, " It's alright. I'd rather be in the class but my teachers are really accommodating and understanding the situation I'm in right now."

" Have your doctor appointments been going well?"

" Yeah, early mid next month I'll be five months along...My doctor told me that if I made it until seven at the earliest going into early labor would be a risk but she could make it; but there is no guarantee."

He smiled, " I know you'll both be just fine."

" Do you want something to drink, babe?"

I sat up and he quickly got up and went into the kitchen. I rolled my eyes as he came back with a PowerAde.

" I'm pregnant, not handicapped." I said before he sat down on the couch. I took a drink from my bottle and laid my head on his lap.

" Close enough." he said, running his finger over my bottom lip before dragging it down to my shoulder and twirling a piece of hair with his finger.

" Well, I'm going to take a quick shower if you both don't mind."

" Alrighty, you can use Bella and I's if you want; I don't even want to know what the others did to the one down here."

He chuckled, " Thanks, kid." he said, ruffling Edward's hair as he walked past and Edward pushed his fist out to get him in the side.

" Nice try!" he yelled as he went up the stairs.

I laughed and looked up at him, " I love your dad."

" Do you have a crush on my dad, Mrs. Masen? He is your father-in-law."

" Oh, please. But he does give me a good vision of what you'll look like in the future."

" And?"

" You'll still look young and have crazy hair."

Edward tickled my side before lifting up the shirt I wore and rubbing his hand over my stomach.

" I want to feel her."

" She was moving around a little this morning, I can really feel her."

" It's because you're so damn skinny you can feel if your food shifts in there."

I glared at him as he leaned down to kiss my forehead.

I felt a tiny little push against the right and Edward felt it slightly and smiled.

" Does it hurt?" he asked.

" No, not really. Just small little nudges."

He pushed my, well his, shirt down and I sat up and moved to sit in his lap. My legs were covered with a blanket and I rested my head on his shoulder. As usual, he had one arm around me and the other on my stomach.

" Why are you always putting your hand on my stomach?" I asked.

" Does it bother you?"

" No, I was just wondering."

" I don't know...It just makes me feel like maybe I can protect her, that if I keep myself close nothing can happen."

I turned his head to the side for him to look at me instead of downwards.

" Whatever happens will happen, but you are the sweetest man and I am so incredibly lucky to have you. We are."

" There was no fuck, shit, damn or hell in that sentence."

I rolled my eyes and leaned forward to kiss him, pressing my lips against his soft at first but it grew more eager and needy as he cradled the back of my neck and adjusted us to lay down, him above me. His mouth was hot and warm, mixed with coffee and mint and I wanted to devour him.

He kissed over my neck and put his hands underneath my shirt as I attempted not to moan like a fucking whore. My hands grabbed at his back, pulling him closer and closer. I missed being able to fully press my chest and body against him, the little bump in front of me obstructed that.

I grabbed one of his hands from underneath my shirt and put it near my neck and his fingers tangled in my hair, slightly pulling and tugging like I'd do to his.

" Your dad is out of the shower we have to stop." I said, pushing on his chest.

" I've been out of the shower for awhile so I did some work on my laptop." a familiar voice said from the kitchen.

" That's kind of sick that you know what we were doing dad, but thanks for not interrupting."

I covered my face with my hands and groaned.

" That's just so weird." I said, moving out from under Edward as he laid on his stomach. I stood up and stretched. Edward gave me a smack on my ass and I went into the kitchen and grabbed something to eat, which was a peanut-butter sandwich. I enjoyed it with slivered almonds on the inside and then went into the living room to get my gifts. Edward and I put our things away in our bedroom and whatnot and I took a shower and put on a pair of jeans and one of the new tops Esme got me, deciding on the black lace one.

Although black was a slimming color, I could really see my baby bump with this shirt, and Edward's eyes kept going back to me; making me feel slightly self conscious of myself with all of the weird creepy staring.

I made the bed and then sat down at the edge of the bed putting earrings in as Edward came out of the bathroom freshly showered, looking at me.

" Do I need to change my shirt?" I asked, clearly annoyed.

" No, why?"

" You keep staring at me. I get it; I'm fucking fat."

And the fucking asshole laughed at me. Laughed.

He came over to me and wrapped his arms around me as tightly as he dared. I wished I had a knife in my hand to kill him with it for being such a jerk and not only staring at me, but laughing at me, when I accused him of thinking the obvious.

" I was staring at you because I love that fucking shirt that Esme got you. I want to ask her if it came in multiple colors. And sweetheart, you have a small little bump, you aren't a huge blimp like most are at around five months. Even though you do stick out a little in the front I still love it so stop worrying. You look beautiful."

Edward kissed my lips, chin, cheeks and finally my forehead as he wrapped his arms around my neck and pulled me to him closer.

" Fuck. Years ago if I would've told myself I'd be living in New York with my husband pregnant I would've asked them what the fuck they were on and if I could have any."

" I could say the same to you, babe." he whispered, " Besides the pregnant part, and switch the word husband with wife."

I chuckled quietly and peered up at him, planting a small kiss on his lips before he brought me back for a little more.

" I love you."

" I love you, too."

" This shirt really is sexy."

My hand slapped his ass, " It better be."

His fingers ran through my long, silky curled hair, loosening them up as they fell over my back nearing my waist.

" When are you going to chop this all off again?"

" Soon." I said, giving him a lip-smacking kiss and pulling away to grab my body spray, giving it just a small little spray on my neck and just a little in my hair misted so the scent would hold.

" Compromise."

" Shoulders." I said.

" Fuck no."

" Fuck yeah."

" Just under your boobs."

" Collarbone."

" Boobs."

" Fine, now shut up."

Zoey meowed at our little bickering fest and hopped down off of the bed, rubbing up against my legs and wrapping her tail around them as well.

" I just like a little something to grab onto, babe." he said, pulling my mouth to his and running his fingers through my hair and down over my back.

My fingers gripped the shirt he wore, wrinkling the fabric to pull him close before he pulled away from me; smoothing my hair back before holding me close with my face against his chest. He made me feel so small standing next to his tall figure, but safe and protected. He was still warm from his shower and the fabric of his sweater was soft, despite the toned chest he acquired from weekly gym attendances.

" Wanna go downstairs, sweetheart?"

" We'd better."

He kissed me once more before we headed downstairs. I grabbed a pair of clean socks from the basket, telling myself to remember to take up the fresh clothes and then started a new load of laundry.

" Hey, babe, I'm going to run out to go get some beer."

" Why don't you call one of the guys or someone to do it for you?" I yelled back in response, pouring detergent in before shutting the little slide out thing where I deposited fabric softener afterwards; waiting for a reply.

" They're still doing shopping in the city and it's just down the street. I'll be back in like ten minutes; I love you."

Edward pecked my lips and stroked the side of my stomach softly before heading down the hall, I followed him and he grabbed his keys and headed outside into the cold. Edward's dad was just hanging out on the couch wanting TV and I asked him if he wanted a drink since I was going into the kitchen.

I grabbed a can of ginger ale and a glass of water for Edward Sr. I gave him his cup and curled up on the couch. My stomach was feeling a little off today, so I resorted to the ginger ale Edward kept in the house constantly when I had this issue. At least I wasn't having any morning sickness as often as I had been in the beginning, it only happened once in awhile usually once a week on a lucky one.

" So, what's on?" I asked, covering my legs with one of the many blankets on the couch.

" A Christmas Story; still."

I laughed and looked at the television just as Randy saw his new jet plane, laughing quiet at the little boys tone.

" Edward loved this movie as a kid. We couldn't turn it off when it started until it was over the next day at seven. Even in his bedroom while he slept he wanted it on."

I shook my head, " It's a classic. I watched it when I was a kid with my parents, and when they divorced I'd always watch it in my room since Sue was more of a White Christmas and Louise in St. Louis person. And I never was really included in Christmas after they married."

" I'm sorry, Bella. But I do understand what it's like being alone on Christmas. Edward always had to be at the parties that Carlisle threw with his family at his home. I'd see him the day after but it wasn't the same, and I knew Edward hated it; that was the worst part. So the next day we'd watch A Christmas Story on the VHS tape that we had since he was little and I'd get two six packs of beer, not that we'd go through all of it, but you know...He appreciated it and we'd just spend the day together."

" He mentioned that to me. Always said he loved that time with you."

" I love that kid."

" But how can you stand Carlisle? He didn't like me until I think Edward and I got engaged."

He sighed, " Bella, I still can't stand that man; but I respect the fact that he is married to my ex-wife and he cares about her. I won't let that get in the way of family gatherings; for the sake of my son I wouldn't put him through that."

I laughed at the way he said he couldn't stand Carlisle. Sometimes he could be judgmental, I experienced that the moment I walked through the door; but I couldn't imagine if Edward and I had a child and he re-married and I had to be civil for the sake of my kid. I'd rip the chicks head off.

" You have a lot more restraint than I would have if I were you."

" You won't be me, Bella. What you and Edward have is something people don't often find; that kid looks at you like you are the center of the universe. He dotes on you."

I rolled my eyes, " Trust me, I know. He's insufferable. But he definitely has no problem stealing all the covers in bed."

He chuckled, throwing his head back, " Oh, Esme used to do that constantly to me. I always had to keep an extra blanket at the end of the bed."

" Yup, I have a quilt right there for me; but if I'm feeling brave I'll pull on him and wake him up, then he'll usually act like a complete ass or he'll relent and give me some."

Just then the front door slammed and Edward put the beers in the fridge before plopping down on the couch next to me with a Heineken in his hand with the cap popped open.

" Beer in the fridge if you want any dad."

" Duly noted, I don't think getting drunk on Christmas would be a good idea."

Edward rolled his eyes and I leaned into his side.

" What'd you talk about while I was gone."

" I was just telling Bella about how when you were little you used to rip of your diaper when you were little...including times when you peed in it."

I put my hand over my mouth to stop the laughter as Edward was glaring harshly at his father.

" Thanks, dad, I can always count on you to say positive things about me." he said, lifting his beer towards him before tipping it back for a heavy gulp.

" That's...cute?" I said.

He tickled my side and I jumped, jabbing his rib with my elbow knowing he couldn't retaliate with me; or would dare to.

" Shut it, Swan."

" Don't be so sensitive, Cullen." I kidded.

His arm wrapped around me tightly, kissing my temple in forgiveness.

" I think Christmas is just going to be with us three." I noted.

" Sure looks like it."

" I've got all the family I need here." Edward chuckled.

" Your mother would love hearing that."

" That's why you never heard it!"

I laughed at their bickering and closed my eyes, feeling a nap waiting to overcome me because it was past noon and I was already yawning.

Edward ran his fingers through my hair, " Tired?"

" Mhm. Scoot."

He scooted over and I laid on my side with my body curved on an 'L' shape, my legs spread out on the part of the couch that extended and my body bent at my hips so I could rest my head in his lap, my favorite place to rest my head for a nap besides his chest. He knew I loved it when he ran his fingers through my hair; it was basically my form of sleep medication.

I rested my hand on his mid-thigh, my thumb stroking up and down slowly as my eyes closed.

" Is she sleeping a lot?" I heard Edward Sr. ask distantly.

" Yeah, we talked to the doctor about it but she said that it's good for her to rest. She's basically bed ridden, and when she isn't sleeping she's doing school work or I'll make her dinner. I'm just glad she's following what the doctor is saying; she's so independent."

" She's so strong for her age."

" She is, and I love her all the more for it." he said, leaning down to kiss my temple softly, brushing my hair back.

" You should talk about me when I'm actually sleeping." I said, turning over on my other side.

Edward chuckled and leaned down to kiss me again, this time on my cheek.

" I love you." he whispered in my ear.

" I love you." I replied, burying my face against his shirt as he tipped his beer back.

I sighed and felt him rubbing my back softly.

" You feeling okay?" he asked.

" Yeah. Just restless."

I sat up and reached over for my ginger ale, when I turned my stomach twisted and I got up and ran out of the room as quickly as possible, Edward yelling at me from behind. I managed to make it to the bathroom before throwing up my breakfast and anything else I had eaten. Edward got to me, holding my hair back as I clutched either side.

" Are you okay? Should we go to the hospital?"

" I'm fine, Edward. My stomach has been feeling like this all morning. The doctor said it's normal to be throwing up especially since I had it so bad in the beginning."

" You don't feel any pain."

I shook my head and wiped my mouth with a Kleenex before grabbing the spare toothbrushes we kept in the drawer and brushed my teeth, careful to stand slow to do this task. Edward wrapped his arm around me, supporting my weight, while Edward Sr. asked if I was alright. After assuring him I was I laid back down on the couch and it seemed like throwing up was just what I fucking needed to take a nap.

~\\~

Later everybody got back and they were showing off all of the things they had bought. Alice got a cute Rebecca Minkoff purse from the gift card that Edward and I got her, and she absolutely loved it. Rosalie did some shopping at Brandy Melville, and Esme showed off a new pair of earrings she had gotten from Carlisle.

Afterwards they were heading into the kitchen to get started on dinner. I had taken the turkey out of the freezer previously to unthaw itself and everybody got to cutting, but apparently I wasn't allowed so I just stayed on the couch with Edward and the rest of the guys.

The rest of the day flowed nicely, dinner was ready in time and we ate in the living room due to the fact that our table set couldn't go beyond seating four people. It was a crazy fun time with all of them around, and exhausting.

Then again sleeping was my new sport; I was fucking number one in the category.

After eating dinner we watched more Christmas movies and enjoyed everyone's company before planes would be taking off tomorrow, leaving with it more love and hope and assurance.

But Edward and I would get by. Just as we always had.

**Authors Note- As I said, I'd never let my stories go two weeks without being updated. I'm on the target for that! I apologize for not being able to get out weekly updates, but lately life has gotten busier! I've had more activity in my personal life that's taking away time for writing, but I don't ever want you guys to think I don't want to be here writing!**

**I love and appreciate every single one of you, and I cherish every single review, whether I get 5 or 50, they mean the world to me!**


	61. Heaven Help Us

**Authors Note- Read End Note please!**

**Disclaimer- S. Meyer owns all things Twilight.**

**Chapter Song- Heaven Help Us by: My Chemical Romance**

~\\~

2011

BPOV

~\\~

We seemed to burst into a New Year quickly, and as the first month of the New Year past and more weeks went by, my stomach grew and my doctor's appointments were going very well. I was showing a lot more now, and it was obvious that I was pregnant. It was no hiding underneath shirts or anything, unless I wore thick big sweatshirts.

Then I looked like a downright bum.

Edward was working hard since this was his last semester, and he was doing so well with balancing school and being around for me and all of my appointments, I was exactly seven months along right about now in mid February.

It was scary, but with it, we had more strength that all would be okay.

We had started moving things around in the guest room and Esme was insisting on sending the furniture set that Edward had when he was a baby. It wasn't girly, yet it wasn't meant for a boy so it was really nice. We'd gotten the cradle and it was literally out of a movie. All white fabric and lace hems at the bottom, soft pillow-y mattress at the oval shaped bottom. The spare room had been painted just a plain grey, but Edward had surprised me by painting it a light lavender that would match the light wooden furniture. We'd gone out and bought things for the crib, hesitantly, but Dr. Jenner said it would be good for us to do it.

She had hope, and I was slowly beginning to believe that I was going to become a mother.

So far we had the dresser in there that was delivered, and certain pieces of the crib and the changing table would be here soon.

As well as having the essentials for that, we had also bought some clothes. Not many, but we already had clothes picked for the hospital. We had bottles and little odds and ends and things that we would need, but we weren't buying anything in bulk. It was that 'just in case' thought we had in the back of our heads

My mom was upset that she was unable to get a hold of any of the furniture I had when I was a baby. Since Esme didn't have a rocking chair, my mom wanted to get mine but she hadn't been on much speaking terms with Charlie; who had all of these things in the attic of his house. She said she tried calling but she'd never get an answer. I was okay with it, I didn't want to think too much about him.

" Bella." I heard a voice whisper into my ear.

I groaned loudly and curled into my blankets, not wanting to get up at all right now. I wanted more sleep and warm covers surrounding me for a couple more hours.

Then I felt a hand on my wrist touching my charm bracelet, and I knew it was Edward putting another charm on it for Valentine's Day. He was going to have to buy me a new one at this point, my wrist was already weighed down with the beautiful charms he would buy me.

" Happy Valentine's Day, baby." he said, kissing behind my ear.

I turned towards him and opened my eyes, looking up at his bright green eyes and crazy bronze hair. He was smiling big, looking so incredibly happy and I glanced down at my wrist and saw a beautiful garnet stone in the shape of a heart gleaming as it hung from my bracelet.

" It's so beautiful, thank you."

He leaned forward and caught my lips in a kiss, moving one of his hands to rest on my stomach where our little girl was still peacefully sleeping. She was always still and barely moving at all during the day, but at night-time, that little girl was doing fucking flips inside of me. She was definitely a night owl and I hoped that would change. I liked my sleep, but waking up with a little foot caught in my ribs was not fun; especially since it freaked Edward out so badly because he couldn't do anything about it.

" Not as beautiful as you. How are my girls?"

" Good. Of course now sleeping." I said, glancing down at my stomach.

I was glad that I wasn't huge like some woman can get when they get pregnant with girls. My mother said when she was pregnant with me she felt as if she lost all her beauty and put it into me until I was born.

I wasn't swelling anywhere or looking puffy. I looked like me, with a bump in the front.

" Mhm, of course. Hungry at all?"

" No, but-"

"- thirsty as fuck." he finished for me, handing me a bottle of cold water.

This was my usual morning. I always woke up so thirsty for some weird reason. Dr. Jenner said it was nothing to worry about; my body just needed extra of everything now because of the baby. I grabbed the bottle of water and took long, deep gulps of it until the bottle was half empty and set it down on the end table before sitting up and rubbing my eyes. Edward took my hair out of its ponytail and wrapped his fingers in it, bringing me closer to him and kissing me deeper.

We hadn't actually had sex in months, and while it was absolutely driving me insane; the doctor didn't want anything to be bringing me towards an early labor. Sex was one of those things, or the release of it I guessed so it kind of sucked, but Edward enjoyed teasing me with his sexy kisses.

" Still think you are up for dinner, babe?"

" Yeah, definitely." I replied, hugging him closely as both of his hands rested on my stomach, tracing invisible patterns.

" Okay, good. I haven't taken you out in awhile, it'll be nice."

I smiled and pulled away, " It will be. When do you have class?"

" It's already eleven, so just one more at eleven thirty. I can still lay in bed with you for about fifteen minutes."

With that I pulled him down next to me and wrapped my arms around his neck.

" Seven months." he whispered.

" Yeah..."

" Everything is going to be great." he said, pressing a soft kiss to my lips, letting them linger for a moment.

I ran my hands up and down his back, scratching lightly as he buried his face in my neck.

" We haven't talked about names, you know." he mentioned.

It was true. It seemed to have been one topic we had been avoid avoiding, because maybe then it made it more official. Of course we had furniture in the room, more being sent to us and clothes hanging in the closet, but naming her would make it more real. She wouldn't be just baby girl Masen.

" We haven't." I agreed.

" I want her to have some of your name in hers."

I looked down at him, " We are not naming her Isabella, and we most definitely are not naming her Marie."

" I mean like her middle name. And what's wrong with your name? I happen to adore it."

" That's because it has Masen tacked at the end of it."

He shook his head, " No, it's beautiful. Just like you."

" I hated my name, always thought it was way too girly."

" I want her to at least have the middle name Marie or Isabella. We can pass that down with tradition. My name has been passed down for forever; now it's your turn."

I sighed, knowing that he would win by just charming me into it.

" Okay, fine."

" Maybe we should wait until we see her."

" I hope she looks just like you." I said, running my fingers through his bronze hair.

" Nope. I want her to be all you. I want a little Bella reincarnate." he said with a chuckle.

My eyes rolled at his words, I could only imagine a little me running around here. In that case she'd be just a little daddy's girl...And this time she'd always be.

I wouldn't lie and say I wasn't a little bit scared to become a mother, but I'd taken care of myself when I had to. I was sure I could figure out how to take care of a baby, and I had Edward, too. I only hoped I could make it to my due date so that school wouldn't get in the way of anything.

We were trying to be prepared for anything, at this point we'd gone through so much we knew exactly what to expect, but now with the pregnancy along this far they were hoping that a natural birth would be okay, either that or I would have to have a C-Section. I hoped for whatever would be the less painful option, and we talked about epidurals; but it depended on how fast I'd go through the labor process.

But I guess things were going to work out the way that they wanted to.

No matter how much I wanted them my way.

~\\~

April 15th

1:46AM

Friday

~\\~

My body jerked awake as I felt the sharp pain searing through my stomach. I sat up and gasped, my hand immediately going towards my stomach. I could feel her moving around like a little jumping bean inside of me, and I differentiated this pain from a foot getting stuck in my ribs. This wasn't that, and it wasn't like any pain I had felt before; it was a new type of pain.

Edward made a small noise and turned in his sleep, but I reached over and grasped his arm, a little harder than intended, but the pain was intense and I needed to hold onto something. Unfortunately he was the one to deal with it. I took a deep breath and said his name clearly. As the last syllable of his name came out of my mouth he shot up, hair everywhere and all disheveled. The side of his face creased from lying on the pillow, and his shirt was all rumbled.

" What's wrong?"

" I think it's time, Edward. Shiiittt."

I gripped his arm and put my head down, biting my lip.

" It's time. Fuck, okay...Okay, let me grab my jeans and I'll get the bag. Stay right here okay?"

I nodded and he kissed my forehead before getting out of bed. I let out a small cry, needing to release a bit of the pain in some way.

Were contractions supposed to be _this _painful?

It felt like someone was searing a rusted knife through me, jerking it around inside and trying to carve me from the inside out. I gripped the sheets and heard Edward ruffling around in the bathroom, muttering to himself and frantically moving. He came into the room and grabbed his shoes, putting them on a tying the laces quickly and tossing a hoodie over his head and pocketing his keys that laid on the dresser.

The bag was sitting in the corner; it was what we prepared for if this happened so that we could just grab it and go. It had clothes for the baby, for myself, and a few other things we could need during the time at the hospital also depending on how long we'd be there. Edward grabbed my zip up hoodie and my moccasins for me as he dialed Dr. Jenners personal number.

He was talking on the phone and carefully helping me out of bed, but I was almost completely bent over in pain. It was horrifyingly grievous. I'd never felt this much pain, not even after the car accident that I had went through; and I remembered days I cried because of the pain.

" She seems to be in a lot more pain than she should, and the contractions are close to eachother...Okay...Alright we are leaving right now."

He hung up the phone and grabbed onto me after putting it into his pocket.

" What'd she say?" I gasped out.

" The pain could be from all the scar tissue from your accident, the pressure being put on it is most likely making it worse. She said to get to the emergency room quickly, if your contractions are close than you must be dilated further than expected and she doesn't want your water to break because you might need an emergency C-Section."

I wasn't able to even get myself down the stairs as we headed out of the room.

Edward carried me as I curled up in his arms in pain. When we got into the car he tossed the bag in and immediately started going fast down the streets heading towards the hospital, which was luckily only about five minutes away. I was surprised we didn't get pulled over by any police officers; he was driving like a maniac. I didn't care enough to say anything, I just needed this baby out of me, and I needed her to be healthy.

Not many people were out driving, and he quickly pulled up to the Emergency pavilion which was luckily empty. He parked before lifting me into his arms and grabbing the bag before walking through the doors of the hospital with stride. The ladies behind the desks got up from their seats, and I vaguely saw few people wandering around the open hospital looking at me with curious eyes.

Being the center of attention was the last thing I wanted right now.

A wheelchair was immediately rolled in my direction as one of the receptionists came near, a nurse following her closely behind. Edward carefully set me in the chair and I winced in the pain of being more stretched out when being curled up in a ball was much more comfortable than this.

" My wife is in labor we believe. Isabella Masen, she is on file here and her OBGYN is Dr. Jenner."

" Okay, Mrs. Masen, we're going to get you into a room and get you set up quickly. Has her doctor been contacted?"

" Yes." Edward answered. " She is on her way as soon as possible."

The nurse smiled, " Great, Dr. Jenner has delivered here before. Mrs. Masen, how far apart are your contractions?"

" They were coming on really quickly it seemed, almost not ending. But it seems like about maybe three minutes, lasting about one minute." I said, taking a deep breath.

Edward rubbed my back softly and ran his fingers through my hair, trying to comfort me as I bit my lip through the pain.

I was being wheeled around as they asked me a couple of questions, another nurse got me on file of all my information and Edward helped me change into one of their god awful gowns once we got into a delivery room. It was large and had plenty of counter space, another area on caring for the baby once it was out of the womb and more.

Just as I was trying to lay back on the bed, Edward carefully helping me, Dr. Jenner walked in looking completely awake and ready in her usual attire. She grabbed a pair of gloves as she greeted us and started to ask questions.

" How are you feeling, Bella?"

" It's really bad. Like- ohhhh god."

I gripped the sides of the bed as Edward came to my side, trying to help me breathe through the awful contraction I was having. My body was curling up trying to reject the pain, It felt as if I were dying, and hell I almost wanted to die if I never felt this again. I'd do anything to just get rid of this excruciating pain.

" This definitely is not normal. Women often go through a lot of pain during childbirth but this situation isn't normal. We could do an epidural but I need to see how many centimeters you are dilated, Bella. Your water hasn't broken yet and we might have to rush you into emergency c-section, I don't want to put either you or the baby at risk."

Other nurses and another doctor came in, introducing herself as Dr. Reid. She was incredibly nice, and Dr. Jenner talked animatedly with her seemingly knowing her before. The nurses were hooking me up to a heart monitor, as well as the baby. I got an IV put in me and they checked my blood pressure, which they said was just a couple points higher than normal but nothing to be alarmed about. The baby's heart was okay, as was my heart rate; but both doctors had affirmed that a cesarean section was most likely necessary.

Dr. Jenner moved my gown to check my dilation, and I was already at fucking ten. The contractions seemed to only be getting worse and worse and coming quicker, with the pain I felt I knew I wasn't going to be able to push at this point; it felt like my lower body was being put through a shredder. I felt like I couldn't talk through the pain.

Everybody was looking at me, but I couldn't physically say anything. I was sure if I opened up my mouth I would scream. Something was wrong, it wasn't right and I couldn't verbalize anything. Edward looked at me worriedly, running his hand over my sweat beaded forehead.

" We have to get the room set up and put the numbing medication in you, Bella. I wish we could have done this naturally but-"

Suddenly a rush of water flooded between my legs, and I thought that I had pissed myself but when I heard Dr. Jenner yelling for a nurse and my gown was being frantically pushed up; I knew my water had broke. I screamed at the sudden searing pain I felt a moment later, and I couldn't think of anything but the pain.

I couldn't do this. My body felt like a live wire about to blow its fuse.

I closed my eyes tightly, my head jerking from the searing sensation ripping through my body. I couldn't breathe; it came out in short gasps and heaves.

" Bella, Bella; open your eyes, baby." Edward begged.

" We can't do the C-Section it's too late, I can already see the baby."

" Bella, Bella, you have to open your eyes for us, okay?"

My eyes only cracked open to the bright lighting and my head spun. I felt my contraction hit me and I couldn't help the scream that emitted from me. It was uncontrollable. Frantic voices were surrounding me, and I wanted them to help me. I tried to say something but all that came out was screams. I didn't know what to do. My hands gripped the sheets on either side of me; my fingers feeling as if they could shred through them.

Tears streamed down my face from the pain. I'd never felt anything this awful in my entire life; I was being completely torn in half, ripped open and sliced to pieces fully alive. My body shook and shuttered and I heard loud, insistent beeping in the background. So many machines making different noises.

" You have to pick Mr. Cullen. It's either Bella or the baby, we can try to save both but I don't think that-"

Everything went black.

~\\~

EPOV

~\\~

Everything seemed to happen so fast from waking up to this moment right here. Within a half hour Bella had been admitted to the hospital, hooked up to various machines and examined by the doctor. I knew that everything was going completely wrong when Dr. Jenner saw that Bella's water had broke and she could already see the baby's head. The screaming come from Bella stirred instant panic inside of me.

What the fuck was going on?

" Edward." Dr. Jenner said in a rush just as Bella's eyes rolled into the back of her head. Her heart was slowing and I felt the panic rise in me.

Not my Bella.

" Get the baby out, get the baby out and fucking save her!" I yelled, running my hands over Bella's face.

" Her body was pushing, I don't think she realized. Her shoulders..."

Dr. Reid was behind Dr. Jenner as two nurses were taking vitals for Bella and wrapping a band around her arm to check her blood pressure, also attempting to wake her. My heart slammed into my chest painfully.

Tears streamed down my face as I stared at Bella's pale white face. It was white, too white. Something wasn't right.

Then suddenly I heard a cry, and laying on Bella's stomach was our baby, small splotches of blood on her but she was perfect. Immediately they cut the cord and the nurses had taken her away before I could look at her; just a short memory of a little girl being announced shortly before she was taken.

Suddenly there was a long beep from the monitor and my eyes shot to it.

Her heart had stopped.

" Bella! Bella, no, no."

" WE NEED MORE HELP IN HERE!" Dr. Reid yelled as she went through the cabinets.

Suddenly the room was filled with more people, and all I heard was a baby crying, frantic voices and a long drawn out beep resounding in the room. I couldn't breathe. I couldn't think and I felt my body being pushed back by a male doctor.

I heard a beep before someone yelled, " Clear."

Bella's limp body jolted and they rubbed the paddles together before doing it again. I was walking backwards, hitting the wall and slowly sinking down as I saw my life shatter around me.

How could I live without her?

How could I raise our daughter without her?

" Bella, don't leave me." I whispered, covering my hands with my mouth.

Another jolt and suddenly I heard the four words that hit me harder than anything.

" We've got a pulse!"

" We need to set her up on oxygen immediately. Clean her up to prevent any infection."

The room was silent and I finally heard slow heart beats. In front of me I saw Dr. Jenner, kneeling down next to me.

" Edward, she's going to make it. She's going to be alright."

~\\~

She wasn't awake, but as more time passed her heart had gotten stronger. Dr. Jenner was able to rid of the placenta and Bella was put in a new gown with new sheets covering the bed. She had a small tube running on the top of each ear and an opening up to her nose to help her breathe more; even though she was breathing on her own now.

The doctors said that her body had gone through so much pain and trauma that it had probably tried to shut down on itself, but they were quick enough to get her back.

After she was cleaned up and I was in the room one of the nurses wheeled our beautiful angel in.

Born at 2:27AM February 15th. Six pounds and two ounces. Nineteen inches tall and born with a full head of curly brown hair. She had Bella's little bowed lips, and tiny ears. She had my nose and chin.

She was so perfect. Tiny, and so fragile but so perfect. I held her in my arms, she was a quiet little thing, and they told me that she was perfectly healthy, absolutely no problems with her. She was just a little bit of a thing from being born earlier, but I'd never forget holding her in my arms for the first time as long as I lived.

One of the nurses brought me a bottle with formula, and she eagerly drank before cuddling back in my arms to sleep. I hadn't seen her eyes open yet, and while it was typical that all babies were born with blue eyes, I remember my mom telling me how when I opened my eyes they were striking green that she'd never forget.

But a part of me wanted to see that warm chocolate brown. She already looked so much like Bella; I did want a little version of the woman I loved most. Could anybody blame me?

I had texted my mom, Bella's mom and my dad. I told them that there were complications but that they were both okay; that I could talk to them in more detail later. I just wanted them to know that she was born safe and healthy. And that Bella somehow made it through all the pain.

Dr. Jenner did say that Bella's chances of getting pregnant after this were pretty much a zero. But I didn't get a sinking feeling, because now we already had our little part of us, all we would need. She said that Bella wouldn't be able to survive being pregnant again, that her body now was physically incapable.

She said it would be best for either Bella to get her tubes tied or I get a vasectomy to prevent pregnancy; that it was very serious this time.

" You look just like your mommy." I whispered to my warm little bundle, tracing her tiny lips.

The way her little head nuzzled against my chest even reminded me of Bella, how she loved to just burrow into anything warm, whether it be me or a pile of blankets and pillows.

" Just like her, too, baby girl." I said, leaning down to kiss her soft forehead.

She was fast asleep, and I carefully set her down in the little bed, still all swaddled up like the nurse had kindly showed me how to do. She only moved slightly when I set her down, but she didn't cry. Her little chest just moved up and down contently.

I reached over towards Bella and grabbed her hand that was warm and soft against mine. I pressed my head against her side, breathing deeply and stroking her fingers.

" She's sleeping?"

My head shot up at her voice and I stood up at once. Green eyes met brown and I bent down, pressing my forehead to hers and cradling her face in my hands carefully as if she were made of glass.

" I thought I lost you. You were..."

" I'm right here...I couldn't leave either of you." she whispered.

I ran my hands over her face, " She's nineteen inches tall, six pounds and two ounces...God she's perfect, she even has your hair; I told you."

She let out a small laugh and lifted her hand to rest over mine.

" How do you feel? They gave you a dose of pain medication just in case..."

" What happened?"

" You just went out. Your...Your heart stopped beating." I choked out, " They were asking me who to save and...I told them to get the baby out and save you. They had to use paddles, after three times they got your pulse going. They gave you oxygen and cleaned everything up. Dr. Jenner is here...She said that you physically can't have any more children and stay alive, Bella. She said it would be best if one of us got surgery to prevent it."

" I'm okay with that." she said.

" They said the pain your body was going through was what caused your heart to go out. It was too much, especially because of how small you are."

She nodded, " I can't describe..."

" Don't, baby. Everything is okay. I texted my mom and yours, and my dad, too. Only your mom got back to me but I'm sure I'll hear from my parents soon."

" You didn't tell her-"

" No, I didn't want to freak her out. I figured you could talk to her when you feel up to it."

Again, she nodded in agreement before leaning over, " Can I see her? I want to hold her."

" Yeah."

I carefully lifted her out of the bed and cradled her before placing her in Bella's arms. Immediately it was like she knew it was her mother and she turned towards Bella, her little hands peeking out of the blanket. Bella reached her finger out and it was grasped by a tiny hand.

" She's so beautiful. She has those long Masen eyelashes."

I nodded, " Yeah, but she looks so much like you."

" Just what you wanted." Bella said quietly, leaning forward and kissing her tiny nose.

" So what do we name her. Baby girl Masen on her birth certificate isn't really ideal."

Bella smiled before looking down at her. " You want her middle name to have some of my name..."

" You know, my mom said she was going to name me Aria if I was a girl..." I mentioned, remembering her telling me that on the phone recently when I told her Bella and I were talking names.

" Aria...I like that, it's really different. Aria Marie Masen?"

I leaned forward and kissed her forehead, " I love it."

" We have a daughter." she said, her voice cracking as she looked up at me.

My fingers brushed over her hair and just a moment later a nurse and doctor walked in. Dr. Jenner followed and we both looked up and I sat in the chair next to Bella's bed.

" We had quite the scare, Bella." the male doctor said, " I'm Dr. Kirke; I was able to revive you. Right now it looks like your vitals are stable and looking over your charts and your history it seems as if the amount of pain you were enduring through labor was more than it should have been. It seems like your body gave out and was attempting to shut down, you're thin and small which is no shock that your body couldn't handle it. We want to keep you for the rest of tonight of course, and the day to monitor you. But your oxygen levels are normal so we can get rid of this machine and move you out of ICU."

Bella nodded and Dr. Jenner smiled kindly, " You're such a strong woman, Bella. You scared all of us quite terribly. I'm so glad to see that you are okay, and goodness is your daughter beautiful. She's amazing."

" Thank you so much Dr. Jenner...For everything."

She leaned forward and gave Bella a small hug before smiling down at her, " It was worth it, Bella. You both deserve the best."

The nurse stepped forward, " I'll be your nurse once your moved upstairs, you can just call me Kailey. I'll be here to help you with anything. Were you planning on breast feeding or bottle feeding, any preference."

" Bottle feeding is more what I was leaning towards, so I was planning on pumping when I can, or substituting with formula."

She nodded, " Okay, we can definitely get that set up for you."

Everybody soon filed out and it was just the three of us.

_Three._

" Edward." Bella said from beside me.

Aria opened up her little eyes and all I could see was shocking green. It was lighter than mine and looked like the color of a green granny smith apple. Her eyes stared up at her mother, gleaming brightly and I leaned forward just as her eyes moved to me slowly. I reached over and rested my hand where her little stomach was, rubbing slowly.

I looked up at Bella and saw tears running down her face, I wiped them quickly before leaning forward and kissing her slowly, my hand resting on her cheek.

" I love you so much."

" I love you, too."

I leaned down and kissed our daughters head softly. Bella grabbed my hand and tugged me closer to get into bed with her. She scooted to the side while I adjusted around her and rested my head on her shoulder, cradling both her and the baby.

" Are you happy it's a girl?"

" I wanted a little girl that looked like you...But I would love a boy just as much, sweetheart."

" You're going to have to have a bat next to the front door to keep all them boys away."

I kissed her shoulder, " Not a chance, I'll teach her to be a ball buster."

Bella laughed, " Yeah?"

" Oh, yeah." I said, tracing the small little cupid's bow of Aria's lip.

She fell asleep quietly in Bella's arms for a good half hour before she awoke a little fussy. The nurse had come in with a bottle of formula and Bella gave her to me so that she could rest. She was entirely exhausted understandably, but I also did want to feed our baby. She eagerly sucked and sucked until it was all gone, and proceeded to stay away for a little while as I held her. I would say Bella got a solid twenty minutes before Aria started to cry.

And I knew she probably needed her diaper changed. While it wasn't the best activity, I knew I'd have to do it sometime. Bella awoke disoriented, still half asleep and asked what was wrong.

Luckily the nurse came in and helped with the first diaper while Bella laughed from the bed tiredly. I glared at her as I tried to pay attention to the nurse, who handed me a perfectly swaddled Aria who was fast asleep. I put her in the little bed to let her sleep before climbing into bed with Bella and curling around her for a nap. She turned around and buried her face in my chest, resting her IV arm carefully on her side, grazing my hip.

" Sleep." I whispered.

" Thank you for doing what I would have done."

" What?" I asked, confused.

" Telling them to get her out before worrying about me...I would have rather been dead than her. I would have wanted her to live a full life whether you raised her alone or with someone you'd find to love, Edward. Thank you."

I buried my face in her hair, " I knew you had to make it, Bella. But there would be nobody else that I could love this way besides you. Nobody who could be her mom besides you."

I didn't realize that she had fallen asleep, but her face buried in my chest and her breathing was more deep and even. I stroked her hair lightly and held her closely, turning my head to look over at our peaceful little trooper.

Everything I needed was right here.

**Authors Note- So as you see I've updated with a chapter. It took me a lot but the overwhelming response from everybody last chapter has been on my mind non-stop. I was compelled to write. This is chapter 61 of the story as you see, and I've started on the next chapter! This story is wrapping up very, very soon, less than five chapters left.**

**I'm so sorry about how long this has taken, I feel awful about it. But I have so many of you guys out there supporting me that I had no idea existed! And thank you so much for the push that I needed, and letting me know that you wanted me to continue with the story. I could never repay for that so thank you!**

**I can't promise an update next week, but I am working on the next chapter and it will be up when it's finished! Thank you all!**


	62. Good Life

**Authors Note- Hello everybody, I'm back again! I hope all who celebrated had a safe and Happy Fourth of July! I've been having a little bit of computer problems so it really has not helped my writing process but I am back on the ball. This chapter is going to be a little filler, I think we need some of that after such intense tension throughout the pregnancy but I hope you enjoy it! Thank you.**

**Chapter Song- Good Life by: OneRepublic**

~\\~

BPOV

~\\~

" For the millionth time, mom; yes, I'm alright. If I wasn't alright I wouldn't have been released from the hospital." I stressed again.

I couldn't really explain to anybody what it felt like when your body was almost dying. It felt like you were just slowly floating away, no pain existing and only peace inside of you. It probably sounded like something you'd hear from a fucking bible hugger; but it really was true. Everything seemed to cease to exist; there was nothing there but your soul finding its way to where it belonged.

Although enduring the outrageous pain of giving birth to my beautiful daughter, both of us almost dying in the process of it, I'd say everything was pretty damn good right now. Except for the fact that my mom called about four times a day to see what I was doing, how I felt, how the baby was, and if she should fly out to help.

After two days in the hospital, Aria and I were both released. The doctors wanted to monitor me further to make sure there was no damage internally, especially with my brain due to the fact that I had flat lined. Obviously, my reproductive organs were now fucked up beyond repair, not that it was hurting or affecting me in any way, it was just that I was now unable to conceive a child. They knew this for sure now that my body would not be able to carry another baby without a miscarriage or terrible complications.

And I was okay with that. I was at peace with it.

It's been a week since we were out of the hospital. Aria is already nine days old and she is the perfect little baby. She's already sleeping on a schedule, but she slept a lot. I talked to the doctor about it and they said it was normal; some babies just like to sleep. As long as I woke her up to feed her, change her, and have a little bonding time; she could sleep as much as she wanted because her little body was growing.

Edward took himself a couple free days from school to help me out the first few days, but with how Aria was; he honestly didn't even need to since he only had morning classes. Usually I was able to put her down at nine at night, and she would awake at around two, I would feed and rock her; Edward and I usually switched off, and then she would wake up between five thirty and seven. It wasn't bad at all, especially since my body was adapting to her schedule so I wasn't a zombie during the day.

Mostly I kept her by my side. Edward and I had got an extra cradle for downstairs and I could sit on the couch while she slept near me so I could do my homework. Something about being around her made me feel calm and happy; at peace.

But seeing her with Edward completely melted me into a pile of damn goo. He's go gentle and careful with her, always holding her close to his face and kissing her. Even when I hold her he is stroking her head and her little belly after she eats. He's an amazing father, and he slid into the role with ease and perfection. I couldn't imagine it any better. He's attached himself to her, and even more to me if it were possible. He couldn't stress enough that if he lost us both or either of us he wouldn't be able to deal with it.

After getting off the phone with my mom I heard the front door open and close quietly, meaning Edward was back from his night time practice. He was too wary of playing in the house, although he loved to play for Aria when she was awake, so on some weekends or week nights he would go to the open practice rooms like he used to.

I set my phone down on the kitchen counter as well as the rag I held from drying dishes and went to him. He was leaned over the cradle in the living room, kissing Aria on her sleeping head before coming over to me and wrapping his arms tightly around me.

" How are you?

" Good. How's everything coming along?"

" Great, my teachers are very impressed." Edward replied, kissing my forehead softly.

I smiled, " You're almost done."

He ran his fingers through my hair, " I can't wait. Has she been sleeping since I've been gone?"

" She woke up about five minutes after you left and I gave her a bottle before she went right back to sleep. I swear those green eyes are going to kill me with how she stares."

" All part of the Masen charm."

I kissed him before pulling away and resuming doing the dishes. He set his bag down on the table and ran his fingers through his hair, tugging at the bronze strands.

" My mom called, again. I swear it's like she thinks I'm going to drop dead."

" She's only worried babe."

" I know, I know."

He grabbed the rag I held and tossed it on the counter, lifting me up to sit on it. I wrapped my legs around his waist and my arms around his neck.

" I worry about you, too. I'm just better at hiding it."

I put my hands on either side of his face, " I'm perfectly okay. The doctors said so, and I feel okay. So don't worry."

" I just want to take you upstairs and-"

From the other room I heard a shrill little cry and Edward pulled away, " I'll get her."

" She probably needs her diaper changed. She passed out right after I fed her." I stated

" Great." he said sarcastically before grabbing the wipes off of the counter.

The crying ceased five minutes later and I went into the living room to sit with Edward.

Aria laid against his legs that were propped up on the coffee table, her blanket loose around her as Edward rubbed her stomach and gave her sporadic kisses. She looked at him with her wide green eyes in awe, and seeing that moment was beautiful.

As minutes passed her eyes started to close. Edward switched positions and cradled her carefully in his arms before sitting up and heading upstairs. About five minutes later he returned and plopped down on the couch next to me.

" Dead asleep." he whispered into my ear before turning me to face him and laying me on my back.

His lips met mine in a searing hot kiss, and his hands ran through my hair and down over my chest to the hem of my shirt. I shook my head and pulled away from him.

" No, no. I need to go to the gym." I stated with a whine.

" Bella." he wighed

" My stomach is all weird looking. No."

He rubbed my sides over my shirt, " Baby, I love every part of you."

" Nice try." I whispered, leaning up to kiss him before pulling him down to lay on top of me.

Edward comfortably laid between my legs with his head on my chest resting peacefully. I wrapped my arms around him and he kissed my upper arm, his hand rubbing over my shoulder. I rubbed his back and felt his body growing heavy, his breaths getting deeper.

" Let's go head to sleep, hm?" I whispered in his ear.

With a groan he turned himself over and stood, lifting me up in his arms and taking me by surprise. I giggled into his neck as he carried me up the stairs quietly.

" My mom called me during practice, she wants to fly out and see the baby." Edward whispered.

" I know, Alice called me saying she couldn't wait for summer break."

" They're trying to convince us to move to Forks I can sense it." he replied as I curled into his chest.

" Yeah right, as if." I said, rolling my eyes.

He chuckled before kissing my forehead and landing us into our bed.

~\\~

July 20th

~\\~

I guess both Edward and I shouldn't have passed off the thought of moving back to Washington months ago because here we found ourselves unpacking boxes in our new house in Seattle. I couldn't believe that we had uprooted and moved back here, but in fact we were here with little Aria who was growing each day.

Esme was beyond over the moon about us moving back, and in the long run Edward missed his family and I could see it. We were in the midst of summer, and back in the muggy weather of Washington. Although we weren't living in Forks, on weekends we could still make trips out to Forks to see the Cullen's.

Edward had graduated at the top of the class at Juilliard with many offers in New York that he had turned down. Instead he was going to be already starting out as an assis. professor under someone at the University of Washington School of Music. He was going to be learning even more and hopefully becoming a teacher. With all of the offers he had they were very impressed with Edward and his talents, but they wanted him to work with someone before throwing him into a class with students.

I was going to be finishing out the rest of my schooling online. I had enough of going back and forth with school and I wanted to be home with Aria anyways. I'd be graduating in the winter and hopefully be able to find a good job in Seattle as well.

Emmett had graduated from UW and was working as a personal trainer out here in Seattle while Rosalie was still working on her nursing degree at UW. Emmett and Rosalie had gotten an apartment just outside of the campus and it was about ten minutes away from the house so Emmett would drop by to visit his little niece who he loved to pieces.

I had to say that hitting the three month mark for Aria was a big step. She was giggling and lifting her chest and head up now when we set her on her stomach on the ground. Of course she was a ways from being able to crawl, she was still moving her arms and legs and being more active, as well as filling out in her features. She's making more vowel sounds and even reaching for things; doctors are very impressed with her development and she is right on time with babies her age.

Everybody was mesmerized by her; she had the sweetest face and eyes that could capture anybody. I teased Edward that in the morning they had the same hair because her little thin hairs would be all messy sometimes; sticking up in every direction.

" Babe, where do you want this box of linens?" I heard Edward call from the living room that was full of boxes upon boxes.

" The extra bed sheet linens can go upstairs." I said, walking into the room with Aria on my hip and her sleepy head on my shoulder.

Edward walked past me with the box and kissed the top of her head and ran his hand over my ass before walking up the stairs. I smirked at him and sat down on the one and only thing set up in the house, our black leather couch. I grabbed Aria's blankets and boppy that lay all over the floor and set them on the couch and laid her down. She happily snuggled into her blankets and the boppy that held her.

I stood and threw my hair up in a ponytail, deciding to tackle what was inside the boxes. I started to look through boxes and found picture frames of Edward and I, as well as Aria. The one I had made him for his birthday, ones of Edward and his dad, mom, and then pictures of us from our wedding day as well as pictures of Aria from the day she was born until now. I put them on the fireplace mantel and just as I was setting the last picture down I felt Edward's arms wrap around my waist.

" It's already feeling like home."

Edward and I were extremely excited about the home we had found. It was a beautiful two story home with four bedrooms and two and a half bathrooms. We had a beautiful kitchen with stainless steel appliances and marble counters with beautiful wood floors and lush carpet leading into the living room and up the stairs into the bedrooms.

There were big bay windows in the kitchen and living room and in Aria's room there was a little window seat in the turret attached to the house. The master bedroom is big with a beautiful bathroom and down the hall another bathroom among the other three rooms.

The living room had high ceilings and it was big and open, light filtering in the space. We had already been able to paint the upstairs, and we wanted to get everything up there put together then take care of the downstairs because we didn't want the baby to be breathing in fumes. Aria and I slept over at Carlisle and Esme's for a night while Edward and Emmett made day and night of painting the upstairs for two days with the extra help of Jasper and Rosalie. Alice hung out with me and the baby as well as Esme while Carlisle worked. We were making everything work in our own way and it was perfect. I surprisingly felt myself enjoying Seattle and being back in Washington. We were a good distance away from Forks, but not too long so we could visit Edward's family.

" By tonight Aria's room will be set up, we just have to get the furniture moved around in our room."

" Don't like camping out on just a mattress and a blanket?"

" I wanna curl up in the sheets with you, baby." He purred into my ear.

I put my head back to rest on his shoulder. " Don't start something we can't finish."

Pulling away, I grabbed the box that had little extra things for Aria and also the new curtains for her room. He had installed all curtain rods this morning, it was just the finishing touches we needed in her room, little things hanging on the wall that she had, curtains; extra bed covers and etc. It was just all over the place around here and it needed order.

" You take all of this and get her room finished and I'll take care of putting things away in the kitchen."

Just then I heard four musical taps on the front door and knew it was Alice. I stood and went to open to door, seeing Alice bouncing on our doorstep. Her and Jasper had an apartment outside the campus and she had just finished her three year program at the school and was looking for internships all around the city in her field of fashion designing. She was about fifteen minutes away from the house, in the opposite direction of Emmett she liked to tease to keep him away, and out of her fridge.

" Good afternoon! Now where is my favorite little niece?!"

" She's your only little niece." Edward yelled from upstairs as Alice slid past me and went into the living room.

I smiled and closed the door, following her into the living room. Aria was already in Alice's arms being bounced around and animatedly being talked to and kissed all over her face.

" I think you love her more than us, Alice." I teased.

She snickered, " Look at how damn cute she is. I can't even stand it."

I saw a bag hanging in the crook of her arm and I folded my arms, " What's in the bag?"

" Just a little outfit." she said, kissing Aria's cheeks, who giggled and babbled in response.

" Alice! Everytime you come here you have an outfit."

" She's just so cute I can't not buy her anything. I walk through stores and see the baby aisle and I can't help but get her anything! Here, look at this!"

She handled me Aria and went through the bag, producing a little pink dress with colorful Hawaiian flowers all over it with a pastel pink denim vest to go with it. It was high end baby clothes to the max.

But who puts a baby in a vest?!

" Hey, babies can wear vests! And it's so adorable! The little ruffles on the bottom totally sold me!"

Apparently I said that out loud...

" What in the hell do you want to put my daughter in?" I heard Edward say behind me.

" You guys can't turn her into a skinny jean, black t-shirt, and converse dressed emo baby."

" Watch me."

" Edward!"

I sighed, " Thank you for the outfit, Alice. It's cute and good for the humid weather. But you don't need to buy clothes for her before you come over. She's growing so much and I don't want her to have all these three months clothes that are so nice only for her to grow out of them."

" Okay, okay. I'll ease it up. You guys need help with anything?"

" Any help would be great, Alice. We have things for the downstairs bathroom that need to be set up! Do you want to do that?"

" Sure! Happy to help, put me to work!"

I gave her the new things for the bathroom and she went along to get that done. I was grateful that the Cullen's were helping us out, we had a lot to get through but hopefully in time it would all get done. Edward went upstairs back to Aria's room and I put her back down on the couch. Her sleepy head lolled onto the side of the bobby. I kissed her forehead as she yawned and peacefully fell asleep.

~\\~

" Finally. God, it feels so good to be laying in bed."

" Mm, you're telling me."

Edward rolled over onto me and pressed his lips into mine, holding the side of my face. I turned my head slightly to the side and moved my arms to wrap around his neck, sinking into the bed under his weight.

" I love kissing you." he groaned, pressing his lower half into me.

My back instinctively arched, a quiet moan leaving my lips. Enjoying the soft touch.

His free hand went underneath my shirt, roaming my stomach and over my chest, gently squeezing my breast. I dug my nails into his back over the shirt he wore, breathing heavily into his neck as he kissed up and down from my shoulder to my jaw.

" And I love your body. So perfect, soft in the right places." he whispered, running his hand over my stomach.

I wound one hand into his hair and pulled, holding him closer and pushing my body up against his. I roamed down to find the hem of his shirt and pulled it up, giving him the go ahead to take it off. He pulled back and threw it off before sliding my shorts down and moving his body to follow, kissing my legs all the way down to my ankles before taking them off. I reached up and pulled him back to me.

Everything inside of me wanted him and wanted him now. It had been forever; well months upon months to be exact. His tongue flicked my ear before he nibbled and tugged. I moaned into the pillow next to me and wrapped my hands around his shoulders, pushing him onto his back.

He laid back with no argument and grabbed my tank top, tossing it over my head and onto the ground now leaving me bare with only my underwear on. I leaned down and kissed his lips, biting his bottom lip and tugging at it. I pulled the waistband of his boxers down before taking them off swiftly. He kicked them off at his ankles and grabbed my hands, putting them above his head and bringing his mouth to my chest.

When the rest of my clothes were gone everything finally connected. The sounds in the room only our moans and heavy breathing, sweaty skin moving together sensually; our bodies coming together as one whole.

In the end Edward laid ontop of me, holding his weight on his arms and kissing my lips every few seconds. I rested my hand on the side of his face, tracing his face with the tip of my finger.

" I love you. God, I missed making love to you, beautiful."

I smiled and turned my head to the side just as his lips landed on my cheek. He settled in beside me, draping his arm and leg around me; the warmth of his body heating me. His face buried in the back of my neck and I could feel his light breathing just as his hand moved to my waist and started to move up and down soothingly.

" I have to agree." I sighed.

He kissed the side of my neck and I turned my body around and pressed it against his. My arms wrapped tightly around his body, clinging tightly and burrowing deeper into him.

" Mm, babe."

" Not another round you insatiable boy. Hold me."

He laughed and reached down to grab his shirt, advising I put it on while he put on his boxers as well as my panties. I heard little noises coming from the baby monitor, Edward had put Aria down a little while ago in her new room, but she usually slept in here. I got out of bed and wandered down the hall to her room and opened the door. She lay awake with her eyes looking up, immediately finding me with a smile and giggle. I lifted her up and checked her diaper before bringing her into our bedroom; it wasn't time for her to eat again for a couple hours.

I got into bed with her cradled to my chest and Edward put his head on my shoulder with his arm around me close to her.

" Mm, my two girls. All I could ever need."

I smiled and looked down at Aria, her sweet face was so carefree and I could also see her eyes falling tiredly. She always slept good next to Edward and I's bed, or side in general. I reached over and put her in the cradle with the blankets securely around her before turning the lamps in the room off and laying at the end of the bed; staring at her sleeping face.

Edward spooned behind me and I could feel his breathing evening out. I linked my hand with his and looked over at our little girl and closed my eyes. Everything was perfect, and here in this moment everything felt so incredibly complete. I had my little family, happy and healthy and god did it feel damn good.

~\\~

" Esme, you really don't have to watch her, enjoy the pool!"

She waved her hand at me, " I should be telling you to enjoy the pool! I've got her, and plus she is the best little cooking buddy."

I smiled as I handed Aria over to Esme, she giggled happily and twisted her little fingers in Esme's hair, playing with it just as she did to mine.

" Okay, but if she gets cranky just let me know."

" No worries. She's a little angel."

" That's because you only see her on weekends." I teased as Esme took her into the house with a laugh. I headed out to the pool where everybody else was and tossed my towel on the lounger before walking down the steps into the pool. It was eighty two degree's in here and ninety, hot and humid, here in Forks.

" Hello, sexy."

I was lucky that most of the scars on my lower stomach were covered by my bathing suit bottoms, but from the bone sticking out of my arm? Well that scar was evident and ugly to look at. I couldn't do anything to hide that though. I felt two capable arms lifting me up and my chest leaned into Edward's, my head resting on his warm, tanned shoulder.

" Mm, my baby. Where is my other baby?"

" In the house with your mom."

Edward drifted around the pool lazily with me while Emmett and the others fooled and splashed around the water playfully. I just wanted to relax, the long drive here and a fussy baby on the way wasn't fun and I really wanted a nap. Edward and I were going to stay here for the night and make a little weekend of it, and so was Emmett and Alice as well as Jasper and Rosalie, so it was going to be like high school all over again, but we were closer and Rosalie didn't hate my guts; and Jasper actually knew how to talk.

" Bella! You can't have Eddie cart you around, volleyball, let's go."

" I'll give you a fussy baby on a two and a half hour - three hour drive and then we can talk."

" Oh, Bells."

I rolled my eyes and laid across the air mattress, enjoying the warm sun and the relaxing atmosphere around me. I loved Aria but it was kind of nice to get a break from her. Usually she is a calm baby but this morning she was far from being an angel.

I enjoyed the warm weather and the pool for a couple of hours before getting out to dry off. Edward and Alice won a game of volleyball against Rosalie and Emmett, and Emmett was handing Edward a fifty dollar bill.

Boys and their stupid little bets. At least Edward won.

" Go buy diapers with that."

" Fuck off, you're just pissed that you lost."

Emmett rolled his eyes and shook his hair out, sitting on the edge of one of the loungers to dry off.

" Bella and I need to invest in a box of condoms actually so thanks, Emmett."

" I'm surprised she still has sex with your skinny ass."

Edward laughed, " Make fun, Emmett. I don't give a shit.

Emmett went to open his mouth, but Rosalie gave him a smack on the shoulder walking past him and he shut up. I smirked and combed through my hair before putting it up in a damp ponytail. Edward sat down next to me and I rested my hand on his knee.

Just then I saw Esme walking out with Aria, who was in her little shorts and thin t-shirt to keep her from being too warm. She had been kicking her shoes off all morning so she was barefoot and of course she was taking her hat off, the little monster.

" I gave her a bottle and changed her, she was getting a little tired of being in the kitchen I think she missed her mommy."

I reached out for her and took her in my arms, she started to squirm and her face twisted up like she was about to cry. I sighed and Edward grabbed her, immediately she calmed and stopped tensing up and curled up against his bare chest.

" Of course." I mumbled laying back into the shade. He squeezed in next to me and kissed my cheek.

" Don't be frustrated, babe. She's just being crabby."

" I know. I know."

I rested my head on his shoulder, rubbing Aria's back softly as she started to fall asleep.

" So cute, look at the little family!" Alice said, sitting down with her glass of lemonade.

" I can't wait to have kids." I heard Rosalie say.

" What? You want burping, pooping, barfing babies?" Emmett balked.

" That part doesn't last forever, Emmett. But it's the best part when they are little like Aria. Look how cute she is. Of course I want to have a baby. I want to graduate and get married first, but I want a family."

There was a pause in the air before Edward spoke, " Yeah, Em, I mean look how cute."

" Don't encourage it, man."

" Deal with it."

Just then Aria broke out in a cry and Emmett got a smug smile on his face.

" Cute, huh?"

I took her from Edward and went into the house to get her out of the heat, but nothing was helping. She was being all fussy no matter what I did, rocking, bouncing, toys and I even warmed up another bottle.

Nope. Nada.

Edward came in the house an hour later, seeing my frustration and took her from me before I exploded. Esme was helping out too, trying to distract her and even checked her forehead to see if maybe she was sick or not feeling well, no, she was just crying to exercise her lungs it seemed.

She screamed louder when he changed her wet diaper, her face beat red with tears running down it. I loved her to pieces but she was driving me crazy! Esme said sometimes you just have to let them cry it out. She was comfortable, fed, dry and being loved; that still didn't stop her. I was glad that Edward had more patience that I did.

I took Tylenol for my headache and went upstairs to lay down for awhile. Her cries still echoed off the high walls and down the hallway to Edward's old bedroom. While her cries broke my heart, I knew that she was okay.

After laying down I enjoyed a long relaxing shower and cleaned the chlorine off of me and changed into comfy clothes. When I got out, I heard silence. It was the best sound that I had heard over the course of two hours of fussiness; on top of the car ride and her sporadic crying here.

I saw Edward completely passed out in bed with one of Aria's blankets on his shoulder. I saw her sleeping soundly in her bed, her breaths even and her face still a little red from crying.

Carefully, I got onto the bed but Edward awoke abruptly, breathing heavy before realizing everything was alright and he saw me. His hand came to the back of my neck, pulling me to rest my head on his chest. I wrapped the blanket at the end of his bed around us and closed my eyes,

~\\~

When we woke up the clock told us that it was nine thirty three. I immediately I shot up, shocked that we had slept from four thirty until that time. We had missed dinner, and I couldn't believe Aria was still sleeping. Looking over I saw that she was missing from where she slept and knew that one of the girls took her downstairs to feed her. I laid back and sighed.

Next to me Edward stretched and rolled onto his side.

" Where is the little monster? She isn't crying."

" I think your mom or Alice took her downstairs. We slept for five hours."

" Parenting is catching up with us." He stated, tucking me into his side.

I nodded in agreement and ran my hand up and down his waist.

" I miss the days of spontaneous sex."

A quiet laugh escaped me, " Yeah?"

" I feel like we have to plan it. Ugh, who does that?"

My fingers ran through his silky hair, leaning up to kiss him softly.

" She's the best thing to ever happen though. I don't regret it."

" It wasn't easy, it was worth it though." I laughed.

He wrapped me up close and kissed the side of my neck.

" Everything has been worth it."

It was the most truth I'd ever heard.

**Authors Note- Hey guys... READ EVERYTHING BELOW PLEASE!**

**So if you read the note above you've heard about my computer problems and I'm trying to get past it! It's been hard writing in fifteen minute intervals, but I'm trying so so hard.**

**The next chapter I am 99.99% sure is the Epilogue. I have just a few things to tie up in this story and I feel like I can do that in the last post; and it's going to be a pretty hard chapter to write but this story will be finished if it kills me! Thank you all for sticking with me, a review would be amazing. It would honestly make my entire process of this hardship even more worth it than it is. So please? I can reply to all of them, I promise that. Love you guys.**


	63. Epilogue: Fearless

**Authors Note- Epilogue! Read the end notes!**

**Disclaimer- S. Meyer owns all things Twilight.**

**Chapter Song- Fearless by: Taylor Swift**

~\\~

BPOV

2012

April

~\\~

For the Spring time it was seemingly nice for a day in Washington. The sun made an appearence through the very few clouds, though it was now starting to set; swirls of orange and blue mixing together as it fell behind the buildings. The air was light, a small breeze drifting around.

I could hear my heels clacking on the pavement, my black work slacks swishing back and forth. I unbuttoned the suit jacket I wore and enjoyed the feeling of the air with no moisture for once. I passed people on the street, laughing and talking with friends. While some shopped, others stood talking and laughing. I stepped up and grabbed the handle to the restaurant. I was immediately greeted by the hostess who led me to the table.

" It's good to see you." he said, standing up to pull my chair out.

I waved my hand and he sat down, awkwardly sipping on what looked like whiskey that was filled halfway up. I took my seat, dismissing the menu briefly to order a drink from the overly perky waitress.

Trust me, nobody is fucking happy working in any type of restaurant. Four years at Forks diner and I hated it. And I barely had customers.

I looked up into dark eyes and dark hair, taking a deep breath before I opened my mouth.

" Thank you. How is Heidi?"

" Good, very well. And Edward?"

" Great."

It was becoming easier visting Blake, my father, as it went on. This was the third time that we've met up since the beginning of the year, after I had graduated and gotten my degree in editing. I thought that it was maybe time to talk to him, time to let him into my life. Edward supported me the entire way and for the first time I met with my father he came with me.

There honestly wasn't much for us to talk about, unless we rehashed the past. But we talked for hours about ourselves, and I got to know about my actual dad. He told me about his younger years, high school, my parents, college and after college. Also about meeting Heidi and his success he has had over the years.

I was learning more and more about him, and though I was wary about me, I talked to him. Of course my mom had given him information as I grew up, but he was learning through me. I talked to him about how hard I worked in high school, and I could see the pride in his eyes. By no means were we anywhere close to calling eachother father and daughter; but we were somewhere.

Getting there.

" Work?"

" Amazing. I can't imagine it getting better."

After graduating I worked two months for a small publishing company underneath a complete asshole that drove me up the wall.

Mr. Boggs.

Asshole was probably a nice word to describe him, but I worked as an assistant for him. I got coffee, made appointments, got him lunch, and pretty much spent my time being his bitch. After work I'd come home in the most awful moods that made Edward want to avoid me, but after a long day I didn't feel like making dinner or doing chores that I had spent my day doing at work.

Then the CEO of Random House in Seattle, WA, walked into the building with an offer to make the company part of their publishers. Apparently Mr. Walsh saw something in the girl who brought him coffee during their meeting, because at the end of the day I found myself talking to him about my efforts here. and I was offered an editing position after showing him some work I had done in college, and even at home with stories and edits I did myself freehand. I was able to show him my resume which included the places I had interned my previous semester. He was very impressed in my hard work.

It was all a dream, and Edward was ecstatic that I was now working in a place I loved. I worked for fucking Random House. It was completely surreal, and lets just say that Mr. Boggs wasn't exactly happy in the position he had been put in with losing me. His little company was brought into Random House with the good work they did do, and he lost an assistant to Random House themselves. Although they were affililated, he was probably now torturing some other girl. He won and lost in a way, I was glad that I was on the winning end of things.

" And little Aria?"

I smiled at my little baby girls name.

" She's running around the house like mad." I noted, thinking of her this morning as I tried to get to work; running around our room in her diaper giggling. She was the happiest little baby.

" We are actually having a Birthday party for her on Sunday. You and Heidi are invited of course. It's just going to be the Cullens, and well my mom is flying in this weekend and staying with us. Edward's dad pulled some strings to come here as well."

" I get to meet her?" He asked.

" I'd like her to have as much family as possible. I want her to have things I didn't. Charlie and my mom's parents were already gone by the time I was five."

" Do you want her to grow up thinking I am her grandfather?"

I sipped at my water, " I do...I know that you and I are still working on things, but I want that for her. I mean, three grandparents is fun, right?" I said with a small laugh.

She had Carlisle and Edward's dad, as well as Esme and my mom; I figured I'd give my baby girl all that she could get. I wanted her to feel loved and surrounded by as much family as she can.

" I'd love to be there, Isabella."

I leaned back in my chair, " It's Bella." I said, flicking my eyes up to his matching ones.

" I enjoy your full name."

" It's annoying and girly."

" I don't agree."

" Hello, sweetheart." I heard next to me, followed by a sweet kiss on my cheek. " Hi, Blake."

Edward shook his hand before taking a seat in the chair closests to me, resting a hand on my knee.

" What are you doing here? Where is-"

" With her Auntie Alice, and I thought that I would join in. Seems like I've joined the two most stubborn people in a conversation."

Blake smiled slyly and shook his head, glancing at me before taking a sip of his drink. The waitress came by and Edward quickly rattled off his order and we folloed suit after him. She scribbled it down before going to get Edward's drink order.

" How has the school year been going, Edward?"

" Amazing. I've learned more than I thought, I have amazing students in the classroom. A lot of potential I love it."

" That sounds great."

Edward glanced at me, " I'm not interrupting, am I?"

" Of course not." I assured him, " Honestly, we don't talk about anything special. But I invited Blake to Aria's Birthday party."

" Will you be able to make it?" Edward asked, taking a small sip of my water.

Blake smiled widely, " Of course, I wouldn't miss it for anything. Heidi will just love going baby shopping for something I bet."

" Oh, you don't ne-"

" Nonsense, there will be gifts for her upon gifts." he chuckled.

" Is he somehow related to Alice?" I asked Edward before looking back at Blake, laughing quietly.

I let Blake in about my relationship with the Cullen's; how they were a real family to me, and he knew about all of them. Of course next week he would be meeting them, as well as Rosalie and Jasper. He would even be meeting Edward's dad.

I wondered how it all would go, how he would feel once he realized that he comitted himself into having a relationship with me, and now Edward and I's daughter. Adding Aria into the equation was something hard for me to consider, I don't want her to lose somebody if I can prevent it. I'm trusting with both feet in that my...father...wants to be there, to be a grandfather to her and love her as his own. Because she is a part of him. Even if we weren't close daughter and father, it was different with Aria.

" Well, I can't wait to meet your family, Edward. Isabella has spoken so much good of them."

" I hope you're ready to meet them." Edward replied with a laugh as the waitress put a coke infront of him.

" Heidi has an awfully big family. She has four sisters and they all have husbands and children. The holidays are always crazy with the kids running around and the gossip."

" I think if you can handle that, this will be easy...What about my mom?" I asked.

" Your mother and I...despite everything we do talk and we are friends. Heidi is aware of this, and so is your step-father. We will always have a connection, and that is you, sweetheart." he said, so much soul in his words.

What he said was true. I was their connection. I'd forever be that.

We enjoyed our dinner before splitting off on our own ways, promises to see eachother next weekend. Edward and I headed off, he picked up Aria since he had her car seat, and he got home just a few minutes after me with a little princess in his arms, itching to run.

" Where's my baby?!" I exclaimed, on my knees with my arms stretched out.

She ran/wobbled over to me before wrapping her little arms around me, wailing something that sounded like 'mmmmmaa'. I hugged her tightly and lifted her into my arms, kissing her forehead and cheeks.

Giggles filled the air and I smiled, hearing the familiar sound.

" I missed you, my darling."

I put her on my hip and immediately her head dropped on my shoulder, brown and bronze curls hanging down her face. I kissed her temple and moved back and forth just as Edwad grabbed a drink from the fridge.

" I'm going to get her ready for bed. I'll see you upstairs."

Edward gave Aria a kiss on her forehead and I brought her upstairs, listening to her little babble as I walked up the stairs. I brushed her hair back and walked into her room. I put on the dim lamp and laid her down to put on her night diaper. Her pretty green eyes watched me as I changed her, humming as I did. I changed her into a little sleep outfit and sat in the rocking chair with her.

I held her close, a blanket over her lap.

" I can't believe almost a year ago I had you, my little baby." I whispered to her. " You and your daddy are the best choices I've ever made, despite any risks. I love you baby girl."

She yawned and curled up against my chest. I lifted her up and put her in her crib, putting her blankets around her. I turned the light off and clicked on the night light before leaving the door open a crack.

Walking down the hall I saw the bedroom light on and I slipped into the room just as Edward was stripping his shirt off. He smiled seeing me and walked over, tossing my suit jacket on the bed and unbuttoning my shirt slowly. Once it hung open he took the tie out of my hair to let it fall down around me in thick curls.

" You're so sexy." he whispered in my ear.

I smiled and kissed his jaw, unbuttoning my work pants that I wore all day.

He looked down at groaned, seeing me in my underwear and heels. I rolled my eyes and kicked my heels off before slipping my work shirt off my shoulders, pressing my body against his.

" I love you, baby."

" I love you, too." I replied, moving him backwards towards the bed and pushing his jeans down quickly.

He fell back on the bed in only his tight briefs as I crawled ontop of him.

And promptly collapsed with my face in his neck ready for bed.

" Tired, sweetheart."

" Dead." I replied.

" Thanks for the tease." he said, giving my ass a swift smack.

I smiled, kissing his neck softly before nuzzling behind his ear. He wrapped both arms around me and turned onto his side, still holding me closely to his chest. His scent surrounding me while making me dizzy, falling deeper into sleep.

~\\~

April 15th

Sunday

Aria's Birthday

~\\~

My house was bustling with craziness, and nobody had arrived yet besides Alice and Jasper.

Alice was driving me insane.

Of course as a mother I went out and I bought party decorations. There were balloons, ribbons, a birthday banner, among other things. I even bought a pinata and my baby girl could barely hold up the stick to smack it with. She found more amusement in throwing it at Edward.

She really does have some of my characteristics.

Anyways, onto Alice, apparently since everything wasn't pink it wasn't up to her standards. She walked through my door and looked at everything like a tornado hit my house. Edward and I spent all night with the ribbons and hanging banners and placing balloons around perfectly, ontop of me cooking all yesterday for the party guests.

After completely shutting Alice down I gave her the job of blowing up extra balloons, so she sat in a corner sulking at me; mumbling about pink and sparkles.

Jasper held Aria, and she was bouncing in his lap with a smile on her chubby face. She adored him, mostly because Jasper loved to read to her and she loved soaking it all up. Aria was so smart and with the Cullen's around I knew she was going to be brilliant. She was already climbing stairs, running, and yelling 'ma' and 'da'. I couldn't forget the mess she enjoyed making if we forgot to put a lock on a cabinet.

Comet and a baby do not mix let me just mention.

Finally when two o'clock rolled around, Esme and Carlisle were here along with Rosalie and Emmett. Edward's dad was on his way from the hotel, and my mom had just walked through the door with the biggest smile on her face before embracing me.

" How are you doing, sweetheart?"

" I'm great. How are you! How is Phil?"

" Good! and good! Now where is my adorable granddaughter."

" Carlisle has her, good luck." I said, turning towards the front door to close it.

Just then I saw Blake and Heidi walking up the front steps, both of them holding gifts. I immediately opened the door, greeting them both and giving Blake a slight glare. I do remember saying no gifts, but he was only being curteous. It just seemed like too many!

" You can put the gifts on the table, the kitchen is on the left." I said, following them.

My mom immediately greeted him with a hug. Carlisle and Esme turned the corner and I felt myself getting nervous for some reason.

" Carlisle, Esme this is Blake, my father. And this is his wife Heidi. Blake, this is Carlisle and Esme, Edward's stepdad and Edward's mom."

Carlisle still held Aria, and she stared curiously at the two strangers infront of her, gripping onto Carlisle's pressed blue button down. For a moment everybody watched her, and suddenly she giggled and reached out desperately towards my father.

Without hesitance he reached out for her and Carlisle handed her over carefully. Blake supported her, knowing exactly how to hold her and she wrapped her arms around his neck. It was weird to see him holding her...

but after all that was her grandfather.

Heidi stood there awkwardly, not knowing what to do. Slowly she moved towards her husband and gently touched Aria's back, rubbing it softly.

" She's absolutely adorable." he stated, running his fingers through her curly hair.

Edward wrapped his arm around my waist, pulling me closely to his side.

" I told you not to worry." he whispered in my ear.

Eventually Aria started to call for me and I lifted her up, holding her on my hip before going into the living room. I introduced Blake and Heidi to everybody, and they all seemed to be perfectly accepting.

Even Rosalie.

Alice immediately started with questions, asking him everything about the awkward high school days to how he and Heidi met. Neither of them seemed fazed by any of the questions, and Heidi seemed to loosen up a bit. I went into the kitchen to grab a bottle of water, and found her walking in when I closed the fridge.

" Do you want anything to drink?" I asked.

" No thank you, I'm alright." she replied, playing with the ends of her blonde hair.

We stood in silence for a moment,

" It's weird...My husband having a daughter. I knew when I met him but I never thought I'd meet you...and now seeing him with his granddaughter..."

" It's a lot to take in. I understand."

She laughed, " Do you?"

" Yeah. I mean, I spend all my life thinking the man I lived with was my father, and he wasn't. I called him dad, and accepted the verbal abuse he gave me because I thought he hated me because I was related to my mother...Turns out he hated me because I looked like my biological father. Learning he wasn't my father was a shock, then meeting him, trying to introduce him into my life. My family."

" He adores you...Really, he does. I can only imagine how he feels about that little girl. She's beautiful."

" Thank you."

" You've been so wonderful about everything. You could have ignored him and passed it off, and I think so much of you for not doing that."

I smiled, " Well, I knew what was right."

She came forward and wrapped her arms around me, I hugged her back.

My step-mother...

It seemed too weird so I tossed that out of my head quickly. She pulled away with a bright smile and we walked back into the living room; back to the family that was now not just mine.

But ours.

~\\~

After everyone had left Aria was completely exhausted from all the love and attention. She ripped open gift after gift, from cute outfits, to toys, to a little bike that she can use around the house and use by her feet given by my father.

She was passed out with cake remnants on her face, and Edward took her upstairs for a quick bath. Aria went down to bed real easily, so Edward came back downstairs to help me clean up everything. We took the ribbons and banners down, and released the air from the balloons. We saved everything but the balloons, and then tackled the living room.

Edward loaded up the dishwasher with dirty dishes while I cleaned up wrapping paper. By the time everything was finished we collapsed on the couch with the TV on at ten thirty. I curled up against his side, his arm around me, and looked up at him.

" Thank you." I whispered against his shoulder.

" For what?" he asked, muting the television and turning towards me.

" This life, all of it."

He kissed my forehead, " I should thank you, beautiful."

" How'd you think Blake did, and Heidi?"

" Good. Him and Aria seem to have some kind of click. She already adores him, I can tell."

I rested my hand on his stomach and smiled, " I want that for her. If she can't have it from Charlie, she deserves this."

I hadn't heard anything from Charlie in awhile, the only person I kept in touch with was still only Leah. She would call me and check in, and I'd do the same for her. She was going to the University of Washington, and lived on the campus. She's met Aria a couple times, and as I've said; I want her to have as much family as she can.

I should correct. Good family.

With the Cullen's around, Edward's dad, having my mother, and now having my biological father and Heidi as well around; I feel like she has so much love around her. I want her to have the love I had growing up as a kid, and even though it crashed; I knew that Edward and I would be together.

We didn't have a love that would fade, one that would be dishonest and built on lies.

" Heidi I think is just a little weird about it." he laughed.

" She's really nice, I know that in time she will be able to fit in."

" Are you happy?"

I smiled widely, " I'm beyond happy. I have everything and more, Edward."

" You gave me more than I thought. Moving to Forks was supposed to be a fucking disaster...but it really turned out to be so much more. Ive got the most wonderful wife, and a beautiful daughter."

Edward pulled me into his lap, and I rested my head on his chest. His warmth spread around me, keeping me warm. I let my mind wander, remembering the moment that we met, from the moment that we first kissed, and to our wedding day.

" It was a disaster in the beginning, but we figured it out." I joked, pressing a kiss to his lips.

He brushed my hair out of my face, " Well, that's the story of us."

**Authors Note-**

**I cannot believe how long it has taken me to get this up, but I have recieved my new laptop as of yesterday and Ive been writing like a mad woman. I didn't want this epilogue to be too long like most. I wanted a simple ending to a story that had so many ups and downs.**

**First of all, I have to thank my reviewers and readers for sticking with me through this process. The end was rough, but I got through it because of you guys and all of the encouragement that you gave me. Each and every single one of you hold a special place in my heart.**

**Secondly, thank you to T-Swift for the inspiration, I swear she will be writing my stories forever. She is wonderful inspiration, relatiable and she is the reason that I am able to get such emotion for my stories. Even though that talented young lady doesn't know, she gets a shout out for being the inspiration that provides you all this story, and my others**

**Lastly, I don't know when I will be writing another story. This could be my last, or the beginning of even more. I'm leaning towards a vampire fic actually, but I want to take some good time on it; as you guys know I like to do. So put me on alerts, I might be around in a couple of months! For now I have to focus on my online class courses and etc.**

**Again, I love all of you; thank you so much for the support and I hope to hear from some of you in the future!**

**Sincerely,**

**Twilightx28**


	64. Incredible News!

**Something amazing just happened that of course I have to share with you all.**

**So ' The Story of Us' has been entered to be in the ****Top Ten Completed Fics ****in September, 2013!**

**I know, we are all freaking out like I am right? Way to end my story! If you guys could simply just go to the link and vote, it would be awesome****  
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**THE LINK TO VOTE IS ON MY BIO ON THE TOP FOR EASY ACCESS, JUST SCROLL DOWN AFTER YOU CLICK ON THE LINK AND CHOOSE 'THE STORY OF US'**

**And ****just scroll down to 'The Story of Us'****! I cannot believe I have made it here, it wouldn't be without you guys and I am seriously over the moon. Even if I am the tenth on the list in the end. I express my love and thanks to all of you guys, and seeing that my story made it in to a competition is FREAKING AMAZING of you all, I can't believe it. Honestly, thank you so much.**

**You can vote everyday, after every 24 hours, ****and honestly keep the votes coming guys! If you guys can get this story within the top five; ****I'm thinking I will post what I've been writing, a new vampire fic (eeeek!) on Halloween****! Just for you guys for getting me here**!

**THE LINK IS IN MY BIO FOR EASY ACCESS ON THE TOP OF MY PAGE.**

**I love you all so very much! Vote on!**

**Sincerely,**

**Twilightx28**


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